


A Nail Through a Star

by Croik



Category: The Evil Within (Video Game)
Genre: Body Horror, Brainwashing, M/M, Masochism, Past Child Abuse, Psychological Torture, Suicide, terrible medical practices
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-05-21
Updated: 2016-09-06
Packaged: 2018-03-31 12:41:34
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 18
Words: 179,433
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3978469
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Croik/pseuds/Croik
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Two weeks after the events at Beacon, Sebastian's search for the truth of what happened to him and his partner takes him straight into an unlikely alliance with the only person higher on Mobius' shit list than him.  But as they struggle to survive their common enemy and each other, Mobius recruits allies of its own the only way they know how.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * Translation into Русский available: [A Nail Through a Star](https://archiveofourown.org/works/11284020) by [Easy_Owl](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Easy_Owl/pseuds/Easy_Owl)
  * Translation into 中文 available: [纵贯晨星](https://archiveofourown.org/works/11409582) by [RalitoEnSalaa](https://archiveofourown.org/users/RalitoEnSalaa/pseuds/RalitoEnSalaa), [SDSlanderson](https://archiveofourown.org/users/SDSlanderson/pseuds/SDSlanderson), [ujhghg123](https://archiveofourown.org/users/ujhghg123/pseuds/ujhghg123)



> Some amazingly talented peeps on tumblr have done fanart for this fic! Please check them out in the links below (labeled by chapter because some of them are spoilery). I'm so flattered, thanks so much to them and everyone following, I really appreciate your support!
> 
> [Seb and Ruvik, Chapter 1](http://valveillen.tumblr.com/post/120377005474/this-isnt-leslie-he-told-himself-again-leslie), by Valveillen
> 
> [Seb and Ruvik, Chapter 1](http://xaira-gabvi.tumblr.com/post/138817607132/i-ship-this-ship-so-hard-a-fanart-for-the-evil) by Xaira-GabVi
> 
> [Seb and Ruvik, Chapter 2](http://delborovic.tumblr.com/post/130021659836/fanart-of-tew-fic-a-nail-through-a-star-by-croik), by Delborovic
> 
> [Agent Lim, Chapter 4](http://croik.tumblr.com/post/140915211070/agent-ye-jun-lim-of-mobius-from-my-tew-fic-a-nail) by Delborovic
> 
> [Ruvik, Chapter 8](http://delborovic.tumblr.com/post/133357234896/warm-up-drawing-of-ruvik-possessed-leslie-from-the) by Delborovic
> 
> [Seb and Ruvik, Chapter 9](http://jazitupart.tumblr.com/post/149358956794/jazitupart-soas-any-tew-fan-who-is-into-reading) by Jazzie
> 
> [Joseph, Chapter 10](http://delborovic.tumblr.com/post/138032458056/mobius-joseph-as-he-appears-in-the-fanfic-a-nail) by Delborovic
> 
> [Myra and Lim, Chapter 15](http://delborovic.tumblr.com/post/148557809246/another-collab-between-me-and-the-amazing-jazzie) by Jazzie and Delborovic
> 
> [Ruvik and his demons, Chapter 16](http://nitacerberus.tumblr.com/post/149079625186/well-yeah-the-16th-chapter-of-a-nail-through-a) by Nitacerberus
> 
>  
> 
> EDIT: Also, I made this fic [a fanmix on 8tracks!](http://8tracks.com/croik/a-nail-through-a-star#smart_id=dj:15307097)

_Welcome to Elk River_ the sign read, and Sebastian pulled his car over.

He sat behind the wheel, glaring up at the sign as his cigarette burned down. There wasn't anything remarkable about it – just a painted figure of an elk, antlers circling the name of the town with pine trees and a stream in the background. He could think of a dozen just like it. There probably hadn't been an elk so far south in ages but that didn't stop every small country town up and down the east coast from slapping one on their city limits.

Still, he watched it for a long time. Elk River wasn't like those other towns, and he wondered if that much was apparent somewhere in its banner. There should have been a warning carved somewhere deep in that sign, some indication that the town's population counter of 1,397 was eleven people short of what it should have been. He traced each line and brushstroke with his eyes until everything blurred together, leaving the shape of the elk a nearly indecipherable smear, like a creature in motion.

Sebastian tossed what was left of the cigarette out the window and rubbed his eyes. "Fuck," he muttered. "The fuck am I even doing out here?" Then he put the car back in gear and drove into town.

Sebastian had never been to Elk River. A few of the older detectives had, back when the killings had made news, lending their big city expertise to the terrified locals. Captain Remmington had told him once that heading into the rural villages was like going back in time. As Sebastian turned down Main Street he couldn't say he disagreed, though he had expected worse. The country houses with their wraparound porches were intact, their residents fresh and fleshy. The barns in the fields stood tall with fresh paint. There were no rotten palisades circling a compound of sagging farms, just a tall, white picket fence and cozy, family run shops.

Almost two weeks since Beacon, and Sebastian still half expected the undead to wander out from behind the general store.

They'd told him to go on leave. "Get your head on straight, because you'll never find Oda with it loose," they'd said. "Leave it to us," they'd said. But they'd read Sebastian's report. Joseph was either dead or worse, and with the feds chewing through Beacon, there were no leads and no reason to go looking. No one at KCPD was sticking their neck out for Sebastian or his partner.

So Sebastian went to the only place he could think to look. It took some cash to get directions out of the locals. By the time he made it down the overgrown dirt road leading away from town, the light pouring through the trees was a deep orange, and he'd smoked the rest of his pack. Amidst the ancient evergreens and ferns he found an old iron gate hanging from its hinges, stone on either side. He recognized it, and again he stopped, just staring for a long time before finally leaving the car and stepping through. And then he saw it.

The Victoriano Mansion. He had convinced himself that it wasn't real—just an illusion from Ruvik's mind that had chased him out of the mental hospital, haunting his sleepless nights. But it stood before him anyway, a blackened shell of its former self but still achingly identifiable. Sebastian took in the mangled grounds, the creaking stone foundation, the charred oak eaves. Even decades later the stench of the fire hung heavy in the air like the fog in a madman's nightmare. It was real, though, as close to Sebastian as anything ever had been, and it was compulsion more than rational thought that drove him back to his car in the lane.

"There's nothing in there," Sebastian told himself as he pulled his shotgun out of the trunk. He loaded it with shells and slipped four more into the pocket of his coat. "It's just an old, empty house." He made sure his revolver was loaded, an extra bullets in his other pocket, and tucked his hunting knife into the back of his belt. "Probably isn't even a clue worth finding."

Even so, he kept the shotgun held tight as he ventured inside.

The layout was a skeleton of what he remembered. The broad, curved staircases that bordered the foyer were still standing, and the evening breeze whistled through gaps where Sebastian remembered windows should have been, but all the furnishings--the curtains, the paintings, the mirrors and fixtures--had been reduced to ash. A family's history crumbled with every breath through its foundations. Sebastian felt the loss of it all like a hard stone in his gut. He should have been beyond sympathy—he _was_ beyond sympathy for the family of obsessive recluses that had perished within and without the mansion's walls—but still, the ruin around him made him ache. It was the smell, he told himself as he pushed a shell of an ornament off the west staircase's post. It disintegrated against the floor with a puff of black. The smell of too many things burned could get its teeth in a man, and he already knew it so well. It made him sentimental when he ought to have been numb.

A pair of doors stood ahead of him, partially opened in a hint of an invitation. Sebastian crept forward, barely breathing, fully expecting Hell on the other side. With shotgun raised he pushed the door open using his foot.

Hell might have very well waited beyond, but it wasn't the gruesome blood lakes from Beacon. There were no gauntlets of dead-eyed mannequins or piano wire traps. There was only a room, scorched empty by the fire, where a young man had once sat at the table his father made for him, playing doctor.

"It's real," Sebastian murmured. He could almost see a ghost moving about the room, reenacting old horrors. When he moved back into the mansion's entrance hall, the vestiges of the dining room lay to his right, a parlor to his left. "What he showed me was real. This place really did exist."

What it all meant, Sebastian wasn't sure. He wasn't even sure if it mattered. But within all the insanity and deception Ruvik had cast before him that afternoon in Beacon, there was also truth. The community of Elk River may have hidden the facts well, but once upon a time, in a hundred year old mansion on the outskirts of a rural village, an act of cruelty had created a monster.

"Were you trying to show me the truth, Ruvik?" Sebastian asked aloud. "Of what really happened to you?"

He didn't expect an answer, but then he caught a glimpse of movement out of the corner of his eye, and a man said, "Yes, I was."

Sebastian whipped around, but before he could determine where the voice had come from, his ears erupted with a shrill pitch he knew all too well. Like an ice pick through his skull the noise shattered any thoughts or focus he might have been able to pull together, and he could only grab at his head, scanning the dark corners of the room with watery eyes. When a flash of white crossed his bleary vision he didn't wait to make it out before lifting the shotgun.

Five meaty fingers closed around his wrist and wrenched it back. Metal creaked close to his ear, followed by a grotesque squelch of wet muscle. There wasn't time to react; by the time Sebastian had his hand up the tentacles were around his neck, yanking him up on the tips of his toes and closing his airways. A broad arm hooked under his armpit to prevent him from reaching for the knife in his belt, and he was trapped against the creature's heaving chest.

" _Fuck_." Sebastian pulled at the slimy tendrils, but they were as unwavering as the white-knuckled grip on his wrist, and he had to fight hard just to breathe. He waited for his flesh to split, for the safe to snap shut with his mangled head inside, but then the beast stopped. Its attention was steady but it didn't try to break his arm or tear his head free, it just stopped, patient and waiting.

All around them, the mansion changed. The blackened ash melted away, giving birth to polished wooden moldings, flickering candles, lush rugs and brass lights. The Victoriano's long-lived estate came to dreary life, complete with its master: a man made of scars in a white robe, flashing into existence before Sebastian's eyes.

Sebastian stopped struggling, but his heart was fast and heavy in his aching throat. "Ruvik."

The corner of Ruvik's lip twitched with bitter amusement. "Seb," he greeted. "How good of you to come."

Sebastian's gaze swung left and right, half expecting a charred she-devil or a slew of barbed undead to be waiting in the wings, but it was only him, and Ruvik, and the safe-headed beast behind him. "You were expecting me."

"I knew that you would search for me," said Ruvik, moving slowly closer. "And also that you would only have one place to look. So I've been here, waiting for you." He stopped, and the tentacles around Sebastian's throat loosened just enough that they could meet each other eye to eye. "I knew you wouldn't disappoint me."

Sebastian winced against the unearthly whine in his ears. He knew he probably wouldn't get a straight answer, but he asked anyway. "How is this possible? That last time I saw you, you were a brain on the floor. I _killed_ you."

"Do I look dead to you?" Ruvik retorted. "Do you really think you know _anything_ about death? How to quantify it, how to fight it?" He wound the front of Sebastian's vest in his fist. "You think the boundary between life and death is so firmly drawn that I couldn't surpass it if I wished to?"

"You're not real," insisted Sebastian, yanking at the beast holding him captive. "The Feds tore the STEM apart—your _brain_ was on _the floor_ —you can't be real!"

Ruvik snatched the hunting knife out of Sebastian's belt. A flick of his wrist split Sebastian's vest open, and then he was pressing the blade hard against his ribs. Sebastian tried to fight back. He grabbed at Ruvik's hood, trying to get to his throat, but then the slimy ligatures around his neck drew in even tighter. He couldn't breathe, and panic drove his tingling fingers back to his own throat, struggling to relieve the pressure against his windpipe.

"I could put this knife through your heart right now," said Ruvik, his voice still shockingly clear despite the room beginning to spin around them. "Let you feel every drop of blood pour from your body. Let your skin turn black and rot away." He dug the tip into Sebastian's skin, until it drew blood. "But it wouldn't matter. You see, I've already cast your mind down my well. You are as much a part of me as any of the others." He let out a quiet huff. "Maybe even more so. Your being here proves that. If I were to recreate you in the world to come...you wouldn't even be able to tell the difference."

Sebastian managed to dig his fingers into the tentacles enough to allow himself a full breath. It put spots in his eyes. "You're insane," he gasped. "And I'm going to kill you again."

"You're going to try," Ruvik corrected, tapping the knife against Sebastian's chin. "But you'll see soon enough, Sebastian. Death doesn't apply to me anymore. Or you." He licked his lips in anticipation. "Let me prove it to you."

He angled the knife, and The Keeper's tendrils parted just enough to allow him clear access to the hollow of Sebastian's throat. Desperate, Sebastian twisted and writhed, trying to get his knees up in an attempt to throw Ruvik away. Before he could mount a proper defense, Ruvik leaned back. He turned his head to the side and his eyes went dull.

"You didn't come alone," he said distantly. "Who did you bring?"

Sebastian relaxed in his struggles, and thankfully, so did The Keeper at his back. "What?"

"You brought someone with you. Was it...." Ruvik's expression hardened. "No. No, you were careless. Mobius followed you here. They're here to kill you." His gaze flickered to Sebastian and then away again. "As if I would allow that."

He narrowed his eyes on a shadow somewhere across the room. Sebastian didn't know what he was up to and didn't care—all that mattered was that Ruvik was distracted. He lunged at the knife, clawing it from Ruvik's hand, and then put all his strength into stabbing it behind him, into the unholy face of his captor.

The Keeper reared back, thick blood spewing nauseatingly against the back of Sebastian's neck. A jerk of the knife severed the largest of the tentacles and Sebastian was free. Ruvik was uncharacteristically slow to react, and in moments Sebastian had him by the collar, swinging the knife toward his eye socket.

 _Kill him_ , he thought in a frenzy. _Kill him, fucking kill him!_

The noise hit him like a strike from a mallet. Sebastian tried to stay on course but his body crumpled beneath the weight of reality screaming all around him. He gripped his ears and couldn't help but cry out, his voice lost in the shrill Hell ringing throughout the mansion. _No, no, no, you have to kill him!_ His knees shook as he righted himself, ready to try again, but then he realized: Ruvik was crying out, too.

It didn't make any sense. Ruvik was hunched before him, gripping the sides of his head, his teeth gnashing. He wavered and groaned as if caught in the same terrible symphony of his victim. And then he was gone. In the blink of an eye, he vanished—as did his faithful servant, the living mansion, even the knife in Sebastian's hand. Sebastian snapped as if waking from a nightmare and found himself standing alone in the Victoriano's burned out shell, the last light of sunset creeping through the stones.

"Son of a..." Sebastian turned in place. His vest was intact and unbloodied, and when he touched his throat he found no bruises. His knife was still in his belt. All that remained of the encounter was a fleeting sensation of warmth against his face, like skin against skin. He was half convinced he had hallucinated it all until he heard a soft, choking sound coming from the floor.

There was a body—a young man lying crookedly on the scorched wood, twitching and gurgling. His pale eyes were rolled back and his paler hair was streaked with ash as he quivered in the grip of what appeared to Sebastian as some kind of seizure. Even so, he snatched up his shotgun and leveled it at the helpless, familiar figure.

 _That's not Leslie Withers_. He remembered the weakness in his knees as he stood at Beacon's entrance, watching a head of white hair disappear amongst the flow of Krimson's officers. He remembered the noise splitting his skull open. _You fucked up, and that's not Leslie—that's him. Kill him_. He curled his finger around the trigger. _Kill him for real this time._

Gradually, the young man's shaking stopped. His limbs were still fiercely locked in rigid angles, his eyes wide and unseeing, but as bile dribbled from his parted lips he at last fell still. Sebastian didn't move, either. He swayed with every percussion from his heart until he felt dizzy, until nearly a full minute of silence had passed. Only then did he lower the gun.

"Leslie...?" Sebastian knew better, he did, but for once in his life optimism got the better of him. Keeping one hand on the gun he crouched down in front of the crumpled figure and took his shoulder, tugging him onto his side that he wouldn't choke. Leslie didn't react, but his pulse was steady beneath Sebastian's seeking fingertips. Faint, but steady. Sebastian let out a breath.

 _This isn't Leslie_ , he told himself again. Leslie was wearing dark jeans and an oversized hoodie over an undershirt, so different from the hospital sweats Sebastian had last seen him in. _And even if it is, he's something else now._ But as Sebastian watched him struggle after each breath, he couldn't fathom putting a bullet in him. He hadn't come to the house for that; he wasn't Juli Kidman.

"What are you doing here?" Sebastian murmured, leaning back on his heels. He raked his hand through his hair. "Fuck. Now what do I do with you?" He was trying to remember if he had a pair of handcuffs in his trunk when he heard the mansion's front gate creak.

Sebastian stood. His instincts as a cop had always been strong, and in the wake of Beacon he understood better than ever the importance of paranoia. He moved quickly but quietly to the front door and peered outside. Ruvik had been right; there were men slipping onto the grounds, dressed in dark combat gear with rifles in hand.

 _They're here for him_. Sebastian hurried back to the fallen Leslie. _They know what he is—they must be the ones behind all this_. He dragged Leslie's arm over his shoulders and grabbed him around the waist, hauling him upright. As much as he hated going into Ruvik's old workroom, it was the nearest shelter, and the overturned table against the far wall provided a small alcove for him to hide Leslie inside. _You can't let them have him_ , he thought as he covered Leslie with his coat. _They don't know what he's capable of. And if they do, but don't kill him_...

Sebastian left the room and drew the door shut behind him. By then he could hear the men climbing the steps to the entrance, and their voices drifted in through the shattered windows.

"We're approaching now," said one. It was too late to find proper cover, so Sebastian hunkered down beneath the western staircase. "Standby."

Two entered first. Sebastian knew better than to stick his head out for a peek, but he could hear their boots scuffing through the house's charred remains. They paused in the entranceway, likely scanning the layout, and Sebastian's heart thudded with the realization, _They don't know this house like you do._

Because Sebastian well remembered running up and down the halls, ghosts and monsters on his heels. He knew the rooms, the sightlines, the connecting doorways. Memorizing its twists and secrets had saved his life.

"Two take the west doorway," the apparent leader passed instructions to his men. “Carson and I will take the east. You two, the middle. We'll regroup here for the upstairs. Remember: aim low. We'll take him alive if we can, but if he puts up too much of a fight, drop him. We have to neutralize him here, whatever it takes."

The men grunted their understanding. Before they could fan out, Sebastian backed away. Using the staircase to block their view of him, he crept into the dining room and pressed his back to the wall. There was a hole to his left where a window had once been; he could have slipped out, doubled back to his car or theirs, but there didn't seem to be much point in escaping. Not if they found Ruvik.

 _Six_ , Sebastian thought as he pulled his hunting knife. _You fought off worse, at Beacon._ Two of them were coming closer; he crouched down, bracing himself. _At least these won't bite._

The first man stood in the doorway, leading the way with the muzzle of his automatic. He seemed to know what he was doing, but Sebastian stayed low, stayed perfectly still. He stepped inside. Sebastian waited only long enough to mark his target: the gap in the body armor at his neck.

 _It's their fault_ , he told himself, a sudden, eager tremor in his hands. _It's because of them that Joseph is dead._

The human skull was a lot tougher when it wasn't rotten from the inside and half split with wire and rebar. The impact of the knife reverberated down Sebastian's arm and made his elbow ache. But his aim was damn good; he caught the man below the ear, stabbing behind his jaw and into his brain stem. It was more than enough to kill but he twisted the knife anyway. The second man was just behind, and he swung the muzzle of his rifle around, but he couldn't maneuver past his doomed comrade in time. Sebastian was already so close he didn't have to aim; he just braced the stock of the shotgun to his shoulder and pulled the trigger.

Most of the buckshot caught in the intruder's body armor, but what slipped past tore his throat open. He was still on his way to the ground as Sebastian wrenched his knife free and shoved past him.

 _Don't go into the dining room_. The rest of the men turned, but they were expecting Sebastian to retreat deeper; instead he darted behind the staircase again, circling around in their confusion. _It dead-ends at the kitchen, but the upstairs has more rooms, more halls and alcoves, it's all connected—you can out maneuver them up there._ He rounded the crumbling post, and having no time to contemplate if the stairs would hold him, he bolted up them.

Three of the men were just below him, having hurried to investigate their fallen comrades. Only the leader was in any position to spot Sebastian, and his shouts were blurred out by his gunfire shredding the stairway rails. Luckily, the angle was bad, and the wood more solid than it looked. Sebastian reached the landing unscathed and put his shoulder to the nearest door.

He burst through into a hall. _Library on the left,_ he recalled as he sheathed his knife. _The bedrooms. No furniture to hide under this time._ He ducked into the far bedroom and pressed himself again to the wall. _The library connects straight to here._

The men were in the hall, but they were cautious. None spoke but there was conviction in their slow advance and Sebastian suspected they were using hand signals. At any moment one of them could find the passage through the library straight to him. But he waited, breath held and ears straining, listening for the hiss of their breath against their face masks. They were only men, after all. They weren't much smarter than monsters.

Sebastian unclipped the flask from his belt. He was tempted to empty it. _You've earned yourself some whiskey when this is done, that's for sure_ he thought with an almost manic detachment. He heaved the bottle through the doorway on his left, into the next room.

The men paused, and though it wasn't much of a distraction, Sebastian made the most of it. He swung out from his hiding place and into the hall, unloading his shotgun into the nearest man. He heard a scream but didn't wait to confirm a kill—fired three shells as he backed away, driving the men into cover, and then bolted for the end of the hall.

 _Only two shells left_. Sebastian threw himself through the next door and into another hall. _But if you circle around, maybe take out one more and get downstairs, you can take the guns they dropped and_ —

Sebastian looked to his left and stopped. There was a door in the corner, shut tight and not nearly as rotted out as the rest of the house. His stomach dropped with the memory of the floor rocking beneath his feet, of the doors flying open to reveal ravaging metal. The shrill screech of machinery filled his ears and he waited for the world to tilt. He _knew_ the trap was in there.

 _Is this even real?_ Sweat trickled into Sebastian's collar as he stared, helplessly captivated, at the door. _Is this Ruvik? What is really behind that door?_

Gunfire screamed past Sebastian, jarring him back into action. The hall was long but he didn't have any choice other than to make a run for it. The connecting hall had plenty of turns—he'd already taught his enemies caution and they wouldn't rush around corners anymore. He could get ahead of them—he could win.

The corridors were just as he remembered, and he moved swiftly through them, though occasionally cringing when the old wood beneath his feet creaked and threatened to give way. By the time he reached the study he could still hear his pursuers rounding the corners, just as he'd expected. _You can get to the extra shells in your coat,_ he thought as he reached the far door. _Or get one of the rifles. That ought to even—_

The door flew open, and Sebastian was close enough that it caught him full in the face. Years of decay softened what the blow could have been, but it still put splinters in Sebastian's lips and blood filled his nose. The odor of copper and ash was overwhelming. Head spinning, he stumbled back, and when he tried to raise the shotgun someone jabbed a rifle butt directly into his solar plexus.

He lost all his air. His diaphragm seized and before he could think he was on his knees, doubling over. The asshole must have spent years perfecting that handy technique. Sebastian tried to keep a hold onto his gun but it was kicked out of his hand, and he couldn't breathe or even see well enough to prevent it.

"Sebastian Castellanos," said a man's voice from somewhere above him. "It's over. You need to—"

Sebastian didn't have his wits pasted together yet, but he threw himself forward anyway. A rifle went off too close to his ear and left him dizzy, but he didn't feel a bullet, so he didn't relent; he devoted all his strength and weight into heaving the armored man off his feet. They landed in a tangle of hands outstretched for the gun. When their scrambling only pushed it further away, Sebastian abandoned the effort in favor of getting his hands around the man's throat. "What is Mobius?" he hollered as he shoved the man beneath him, putting the strength of his shoulders into his choking fingers. "Why are you trying to kill me? Why did you take my partner!"

The man sputtered and squirmed, but he was no match for Sebastian and his leverage. His eyes bulged beneath his faceguard. Instead of trying to pry the hands from his neck, he suddenly lashed out, grabbing for the revolver in Sebastian's shoulder holster. It made Sebastian angry more than anything. Even when the man squeezed the trigger, and Sebastian felt the heat of the shot through the leather, righteous fury guided his hand to his hunting knife, and his hunting knife into an eye socket.

 _Destroy the brain_ , he thought wildly as he jabbed the knife all the way to the hilt, _or he might get back up._

The rest were coming. Sebastian abandoned the knife and instead freed his revolver as he made a dash for the stairs. There were only three left, maybe two, if his shotgun had caught one of them in the hall. He could still win. He all but flew down the eastern staircase, heart skipping on every stair that threatened to give way beneath him. When he hit the floor he heard shouts above, and then gunfire ripping through the rails and ornaments. He grabbed the stair post with his left hand and swung about, trying to propel himself out of their line of sight, but there were bullets everywhere, cutting through the wood like icicles through snow. They were _everywhere_ , stabbing into his thigh, slicing through his holster, tearing flesh from his throat. Agony erupted up and down his entire left side, and again when his back hit the floor.

 _Oh_ , Sebastian thought, breathless and burning. _This is real after all._

Everything became blood: blood slicking his teeth, blood pouring from his leg, blood pumping against his hand when he reached for his neck. Even his muscles felt liquefied for all the good they were doing in his limbs, and he couldn't draw his legs in let alone hope to stand on them. All he could do was shudder, smothering the wound in his already copper-clogged throat, until the men were over him.

"Shit," said one. "I shot his fucking throat out."

"He just killed half our team—I think that counts as enough of a fight."

A boot pinned Sebastian's wrist the floor. It wasn't until he felt the revolver grip digging into the meat of his thumb that he even remembered he still had a weapon. "HQ, this is Alpha," the man who owned the boot was saying. "Target is down. He killed three of our men, including the captain. He didn't leave us any choice."

Sebastian could barely see more than a smear of shadows above him, but he strained his eyes anyway, trying to make out anything of his killers. There were three men left, two with their rifles trained at his head. The third was standing back, arm held tight to his chest and blood on his uniform. Three red stars decorated his chest.

A radio crackled. "Is he dead?" said a woman's voice.

"Getting there. He won't be talking, at least."

"...That's fine. Bring the body when you're finished."

"Yes, ma'am." 

The radio clicked off. Sebastian squirmed, but there was nowhere to go and he had no strength to take him there. He waited for his life to flash before his eyes or something, dreading it, but the bark of the gun came too soon to be his death knell. One moment the man standing above him was reaching for his trigger, and the next his brain was spilling out the back of his shattered helmet.

He crumpled. The other men whipped around, and another was felled just as easily, the vertebrae in his neck splitting beneath a bullet. The third man got his rifle up fast for being injured. Without waiting to see if a third shot would take him, too, Sebastian lifted his revolver and fired. He pumped six shots into the bastard and got lucky when two caught him in the armpit, burrowing past the body armor and into his lungs. With a sickening gurgle, he dropped.

Sebastian let his arm fall, and the revolver skidded out of his grip. They were dead. It didn't change that he was dead, too, but he took some morbid pleasure in dragging a few shadowy goons with him. But then he heard footsteps approaching, and his already tingling limbs went cold. Leslie was standing over him, an old hunting rifle in his hands.

 _That's not Leslie._ If Sebastian had harbored any secret hope that a trace of the poor young soul still resided in his own body, it was scattered at the sight of Ruvik's emotionless glare fixed on him. Even without the scars and protruding brain he barely looked human. Sebastian groaned; if he was lucky, Ruvik would think him not worth the effort and put him down quick. And it looked for a moment that that might be the case, but then something in Ruvik's unimpassioned face twisted, and he slung the rifle over his shoulder. He crouched down at Sebastian's left and reached for the hand on his neck.

"Let me see," he said.

Sebastian jerked back, and when Ruvik reached for him again he tried to fend him off with his other hand. Ruvik snorted with irritation, even though it didn't take much effort to brush off Sebastian's feeble attempts at resistance. "If your jugular is severed, you're already dead," Ruvik said sharply. "Let me see."

Sebastian shuddered; he knew it wasn't beyond Ruvik to torture a man who was already dying. But he peeled his hand back anyway, and gagged at the sensation of fresh blood escaping the wound. Ruvik leaned over him, hissing softly through his teeth as he prodded at the torn flesh. "Hmm, you're lucky. Five stitches ought to do it." He pressed Sebastian's hand back. "Keep that pressure tight."

"What...?" When Ruvik leaned back Sebastian tried to keep an eye on him, but he couldn't lift his head. He felt Ruvik unbuckling his belt. "What are you doing?"

"Saving your life," said Ruvik. He slipped the belt around Sebastian's thigh and drew it tight; pain skittered up and down Sebastian's frayed nerves and he cried out. Once satisfied with the tourniquet Ruvik moved to Sebastian's other side. "Bend your right knee."

Sebastian grimaced as he tried to comply, but it took Ruvik's help to draw his leg in. "You," he gasped, grabbing at Ruvik's shoulder. "You were...going to kill me."

"Don't be an idiot." Ruvik reached across his chest to grip his gun holster; though torn by the rifle fire, it held tight enough when Ruvik pulled. "Roll toward me," he instructed, and once Sebastian was semi-upright Ruvik drew his arm over his shoulders. "Now push with your right leg—push, push against me. Get up."

Sebastian clenched his jaws, shivering beneath his sweat as he forced himself up. He only made it half-way before a wave of pain and nausea threatened to drop him, and when Ruvik couldn't bear his weight, they stumbled awkwardly into the wall. With a muttered curse Ruvik wrapped his arm around Sebastian's waist and pulled, until they were stable and upright enough to move.

"I can't carry you," Ruvik warned as he half-dragged Sebastian toward the eastern door. "If you pass out, I'm leaving you."

"Fuck you." Sebastian tested his left leg, just to see if it would hold any weight, but the burning that flared up and down his side was so great he almost collapsed again. " _Fuck_ ," he growled. Ruvik had to lean them against the wall another moment before he was able to continue. "Fuck, what the fuck did they want with me?"

"What Mobius always wants," Ruvik muttered. "Now stop talking."

He led them through the parlor and into the next hall. By then Sebastian was panting and light-headed, blood soaking his shirt and pant leg, and he couldn't be sure if he made the entire trip to the music room fully conscious. He snapped awake quickly enough when he heard the soft metallic whirr of a safe dial. Ruvik was opening the secret room in the corner. Sebastian cringed, expecting a burst of blood and muscle, but the passageway opened like any other door, into a shadow-cloaked hallway.

"When the men don't report back, Mobius will send more," Ruvik said as he pulled Sebastian to the end of the hall. Even though the passage didn't seem to have been badly affected by the fire, everything was still black in the lightless workroom at the hall's end. "And they'll keep sending more as long as they think you survived. We'll have to be quick."

He guided Sebastian onto a stool and urged him to lean back against the work bench. It wasn't much of a reprieve but Sebastian sagged against the rotting wood as if it were silk sheets. The strength went out of him, and cold crept in through his fingers and toes, wringing the blood from his wounds. Even when Ruvik lit a small kerosene lamp on the table, his vision was too weak to make out any detail in the room, and he didn't try. He tried to concentrate on each breath, each pulse, not certain if there was any point left in fighting. It would have been easier to let go, he thought, listening to Ruvik rustle about the room. He should have left Ruvik to the fuckers that had created him. They weren't his problem anymore.

But then Ruvik started to pull his hand away from his neck again. He clapped it back, snarling through his teeth like a wounded dog. He couldn't let Ruvik win. Even if it meant dying alone in the enemy's house, he couldn't bear the thought of giving him one inch of his compliance. "Don't touch me."

Ruvik was sitting on a crate next to him, his cheeks deceptively warm-colored in the lamp light. It didn't do much for his eyes. "What is it you think I'm going to do?" he asked.

"You were..." Sebastian swallowed hard and winced. " _You_ were going to kill me before _they_ showed up."

"You think I'm trying to kill you now?"

"Aren't you?" Sebastian looked past him to an open case on the table, scalpels gleaming orange among needles and glass bottles. "It wouldn't be the first time."

"Sebastian," said Ruvik, the certainty of his voice drawing his focus back. "Mobius is coming for you, and you are bleeding out in two places. If I wanted to kill you, all I'd have to do is walk away."

Sebastian stared back at him, trying to see the lie in Ruvik's false face. There was no reason to trust him and plenty of reasons to just let everything slip away, but every throb from his neck screamed, _You don't want to die here._ _Not here, not with him._ Teeth clenched, he put his hand to the table.

Ruvik immediately went to work. Even in the dim light he moved with swift precision, wetting a wad of gauze to clean the wound. Sebastian braced himself as Ruvik scooted in closer, expecting rough treatment, but Ruvik's hands were steady as he wiped away the blood and traces of ash. He disturbed the wound only as much as necessary with each swipe, finally emptying a bottled water over anything that remained. Sebastian kept still as best he could, but when Ruvik ripped open the suture packaging, he couldn't help a shudder.

"Where did you...?" he croaked, eyes wide as Ruvik threaded a curved needle.

"These supplies have never been used," said Ruvik. "They're as sterile as they can be, not that we have luxury of worrying about that now." He finished threading the needle. "Now stay still." He nudged Sebastian's chin into a suitable position. "And don't speak."

Sebastian sucked in a long breath. It wasn't his first time getting stitches by far, but the situations hardly compared, and his hands were shaking. He flinched when Ruvik pinched the wound shut and couldn't help a thin groan of pain at the first prick of the needle. The sensation of the metal easing through his skin rattled his stomach. "Fuck..."

"Don't squirm," Ruvik ordered. "You've had stitches before."

"How would...." Sebastian squeezed his eyes shut. "With _anesthetic_."

"Pain is important." Ruvik drew the thread through. "It's how your body communicates with you. Damming it is like smothering a screaming child."

Sebastian grimaced. "Christ, the things that come out of your mouth."

Ruvik tightened the first stitch. To Sebastian it felt as if his throat was being turned inside out, and he gasped, one hand tightening against his knee while the other latched involuntarily onto the closest brace: Ruvik's shoulder.

Ruvik grunted. He passed the needle to his other hand so he could pry the hand off him. But instead of shoving it away, he drew it down, guiding it his hip. "If you have to grip something, grip here," he said. "At least then your arm is out of my way."

Sebastian started to reply, but then Ruvik leaned in closer again; Ruvik's knee rubbing against his wounded thigh drew from him another jagged gasp as pain shot up his side and down to his ankle. He wound his fist reflexively around the waist of Ruvik's jeans. " _Fuck_ ," he hissed. "Fuck you, be careful."

"I need to be close to see," said Ruvik. "There's not much light, you know." But he did adjust, turning enough to take pressure off Sebastian's leg, instead leaning into the crook of his elbow. He nudged Sebastian's chin again. "Now _stop talking_."

He went back to work, and Sebastian did his best to not cause any more interruptions. It seemed to take hours—Ruvik piercing him, and then again, drawing the thread tight, tying it off. The world became a dark blur of tightening agony; the pounding of Sebastian's own heart in his ears; the flicker of red light against his closed eyelids; the stirring of Ruvik's breath against his jaw. The monster commanded his new body with confident authority, never stuttering or missing his mark, even when Sebastian clenched and quivered against him. Just one stitch after the other, quiet and unrelenting, until the final knot was tied.

Ruvik smeared a dab of sharp-smelling cream across the closed wound with this thumb. "Five stitches," he said as he ripped open a clean bandage. "Just like I said."

Sebastian breathed a long sigh, his shoulders sagging. Ruvik had to prod him again in order to affix the bandage, securing it in place with tape. He then wrapped Sebastian's neck with gauze. "That wasn't the worst of it," he warned as he stood. He eased Sebastian's hand from his jeans. "Are you ready for the leg?"

Sebastian stretched his back carefully against the worktable. "Do I have a choice?" he grumbled.

Ruvik repositioned his crate. He stretched Sebatian's leg out slowly, with more care than Sebastian would have thought him capable of, but as soon as he was seated he slung his own leg over Sebastian's shin and then bent his knee, locking the injured leg in place. Sebastian moaned and tried not to fight back.

"God, that hurts," he breathed.

Ruvik tore his pant leg open around the wound. "No exit wound," he murmured. "The bullet is still in there." He pressed both hands flat to Sebastian's trembling thigh and splayed his fingers. "Take a deep breath," said. "And hold it."

Sebastian did so. He expected pain, but what followed he was almost at a loss to comprehend. A tingle spread up and down his already unsteady frame, like a low level current, tightening his overworked muscles. He hissed, clutching at the edge of the workbench, but what frightened him beyond reason was the sensation in his foot: his toes were wiggling. With no help from him his toes curled and stretched, and his heart beat rapidly against his ribs with the realization that his body suddenly didn't belong to him.

"What are you doing?" he demanded. When he tried to reach for Ruvik, he quickly realized that he couldn't; his arm simply wouldn't obey. Panic lit him ablaze. "What the hell are you—"

"Quiet," Ruvik snapped, and Sebastian's jaw clapped shut. "I'm trying to listen."

Sebastian whimpered through his closed teeth. _No, no, no, he can't still do this,_ he thought madly. He closed his eyes and tried not to think about boils rupturing his skin. _He can't do this to you—this is you fucking body!_

Abruptly, the feeling dissipated. Sebastian jerked as he regained control of his limbs, weak as they were. His breath came fast as he glared at his benefactor. "What the fuck did you just do to me?"

"I was asking your leg where the bullet is," said Ruvik calmly. He ripped Sebastian's pant leg open further and then cleaned the wound and surrounding area as best he could. "There's been some damage to the muscle. Even with surgery, you'll probably have a limp for the rest of your life."

He leaned forward, retrieving a scalpel and forceps from his case. The sight of the gleaming blade turned Sebastian's stomach. "You didn't just survive the STEM," said Sebastian tremulously. "You didn't just take Leslie's body. You brought something else out of there with you—you're a monster."

"Don't be dramatic." Ruvik felt out along the outside of Sebastian's thigh and then stopped, tapping with two fingers. "There it is." He tightened his leg around Sebastian's. "Brace yourself. This won't take long."

Sebastian took in another deep breath and held it as Ruvik cut into his skin. The scalpel was so sharp he almost didn't feel it at first—it was the forceps gliding into the wound that drew fresh sweat to his brow. But true to his word, Ruvik was swift. He guided his instruments with unwavering accuracy and within seconds the bullet was pattering on the floor.

"There's not much else I can do without opening you up," Ruvik said as he re-threaded his needle and began stitching the incision he'd opened. "But I doubt you'd want me doing that here, even if we had the time."

"No shit." Sebastian wilted. The pain was finally becoming overwhelming, and he had to fight to keep his eyes open as he watched Ruvik work. It was surreal; Ruvik was so calm, so focused, with almost no hint of emotion in his downcast eyes. "I wouldn't have thought you even knew how to do this," Sebastian muttered. "I thought all you cared about was taking people apart."

"The human body is an incredible thing," said Ruvik as he moved to the entrance wound. "I've taught myself as much as I can about how to keep one alive. Live bodies make better subjects than dead ones."

"Jesus Christ..." Sebastian grimaced with revulsion. "I should have killed you. I should..." He wavered on his stool and had to grip the bench to keep from slumping off it. "Kill you..."

Ruvik finished with his stitches and reached back into his bag for bandages. "Stay awake, Sebastian," he warned as he covered the two wounds and wrapped them tight. "Now that I've stitched you up I can't let Mobius find your corpse, or they'll know I was here."

Sebastian bit his lip hard, but it didn't help his focus any. The air in the room was too heavy; it was weighing him down, it was hard to draw into his lungs. He forced himself to watch Ruvik finish his work, and then, with trepidation, Ruvik preparing a syringe. "What's…?"

"Cefazolin," said Ruvik. "To prevent infection." He stretched Sebastian's arm out and administered the drug; Sebastian didn't feel the needle, though he couldn't be sure if it was a testament to Ruvik's skill, or how profoundly screwed the rest of him already was.

"That's all I can do, for now." Ruvik packed everything back into his case. After a moment of rustling around, he pressed a plastic bottle into Sebastian's hand and uncapped it. "Drink this," he said, guiding it to Sebastian's mouth. "Slowly."

Sebastian growled and tried to lean away. "What is—"

"It's orange juice," Ruvik said impatiently. "Stop being so difficult—I just saved your life twice over."

"Force of habit," Sebastian grumbled, but he did drink. The tang hitting his tongue helped a little, but when he tried to get a proper gulp, Ruvik urged the bottle back down.

"Count to ten," Ruvik instructed, "out loud, and then take another sip. And keep doing that until I get back." He lifted the lantern off the workbench and grabbed a duffel bag from the floor.

Sebastian tried to straighten up. "Where are you going?"

"Keep drinking, and don't move," Ruvik insisted. "I'll be back."

"Wait, what are you—" But before Sebastian had finished speaking, Ruvik was gone, the light with him, leaving total darkness behind.

Sebastian shivered, eyes wide as he waited for them to adjust, but there was no source of light to draw shapes from; not so much as a crack in the wall. "One," he whispered. "Two, three...fuck this." He took another drink, gagging a little at the taste of blood that came with the juice, but he kept it down. He wanted to swallow the whole bottle at once, but he understood what Ruvik's intentions were; he was only trying to keep him focused, keep him conscious. After another few seconds he drank again.

The house was silent. The cement blocks that made up the walls crowded out any noise from outside, even the wind through the bricks. He couldn't see his own hand in front of his face. Panic started to seem like a viable option as the minutes ticked away; maybe Ruvik wasn't coming back. He had to—he had left his supplies, his pet to torture, it made no sense to leave then—but Sebastian couldn't stop thinking about what would happen if he didn't. Maybe "Mobius" would find him, whoever the fuck they were, and finally put him down. Maybe if he talked a little, someone would talk back. Maybe his leg would rot off and he'd die alone in a lightless room, everything already so dark and cold he wouldn't even be able to tell the difference.

 _But what if he comes back?_ Sebastian continued to take small sips of his orange juice as he reached out along the bench, feeling for Ruvik's medical case. He fumbled the latches open and drew his fingertips carefully over each instrument. _You could drag a scalpel across his throat. Wouldn't that be worth all this pain?_ His fingers were half numb but he pried the scalpel from its casing and drew it close to him. _Even if you make it out of this fucking mansion, there's nowhere to go that these bastards won't find you. Do you really think you can be a hero and take them down yourself? At least if you deny them Ruvik..._

His hands shook. He downed the rest of his drink and let the bottle fall as he continued to convince himself. _He deserves it, after the people he's hurt, he's killed. He's going to keep doing it, if he gets away now. Then all those deaths will be on you._ Sebastian palmed the scalpel in his right hand and pressed it to the work bench, trying to look as if he needed the support—which he did anyway. Ruvik wouldn't be able to see it until he was in range. _Kill him. His death is worth more than your life now. Just kill the bastard and let it be over._

Sebastian stewed in his bitter resignation for what felt like ages. By the time he heard Ruvik returning down the hall he was half-conscious and wishing he had taken the advice about the juice. But the footsteps wakened him. The lamp light, dull as it was, hurt Sebastian's eyes as it bobbed closer. He took a deep breath, steeling himself. _Kill him._ He braced his empty hand to his knee as he leaned forward. _Kill him_.

Ruvik set his bag down on the floor; it made a heavier sound than Sebastian remembered. Then he looked up. There wasn't any way he could have seen the blade from their positions, but he regarded Sebastian coolly and said, "If you're going to use that, don't aim for my throat."

Sebastian tensed. "What?"

"The scalpel." Ruvik took a step closer, putting himself deliberately in range. He set the lantern onto the bench. "You should put it through my eye socket," he said, leaning over Sebastian. "As deep as you can. Because if you leave my brain intact for even a moment, I will make you wish you had never left Beacon."

Sebastian tried to remain firm. His fingers curled around the metal and he stared Ruvik straight in the face, gauging the distance he had to cross. He could do it, if he was quick. It was worth it. But then he thought of Beacon. For two long weeks after leaving that cursed asylum he had sweated through his nights, his only real comfort knowing that nothing he faced for the rest of his life could ever match the horrific ordeal. The longer he met Ruvik's unblinking eyes, the more he doubted. His heart thudded and his stomach threatened to empty.

If anyone else had warned him that a worse fate awaited him than what he had already overcome, he would have laughed; but Ruvik himself was before him, eyes hard in his deceptively youthful face, and Sebastian believed him. From his throbbing neck down to his traitorous toes, he believed him, and when Ruvik held out his hand, he surrendered the scalpel.

"What are you?" Sebastian whispered. "What are you really?"

Ruvik lifted his free hand, and Sebastian cringed but didn't try to retreat as five blood-smeared fingers cupped his chin. "You have a lot of questions for me," Ruvik said. "And I intend to answer. I have a few questions for you, too, after all. But neither of us can get our answers from corpses." He lowered his voice. "Do you want to die here, Sebastian?"

The answer thundered through Sebastian's bones with a ferocity he didn't know he was still capable of. "No."

"Good." Ruvik leaned back. "Take off the tourniquet. You're going to have to use that leg."

Sebastian did as he was told while Ruvik packed the scalpel back into its case. As soon as the belt was loosened, fresh blood flowed into Sebastian's aching leg with a feeling like daggers under his skin. He hissed and shuddered as he fixed his belt around his waist once more. "I don't know if I can walk," he admitted.

"Then you'll run," said Ruvik. He packed the case into his duffel and then returned, sheathing Sebastian's hunting knife in his belt and his revolver in its holster. "They're already here. I know where we can go, but it's not close, and we have to stay ahead of them." He drew the duffel over his shoulders, and it was then that Sebastian noticed his shotgun, along with Ruvik's hunting rifle, sticking out of it. "And like I said: I can't carry you."

Sebastian tried to bend his injured leg, without much success; his muscles spasmed as if preparing to abandon his femur all together. Sheer stubbornness put enough strength in his elbows and knees to force him off his stool. He stumbled almost immediately and had to catch himself on the wall. But despite the agony, and the cold sweat soaking him, and the blood wailing through his veins, he remained upright. "I'll manage," he said.

Ruvik blew out the lantern and then moved closer, grabbing Sebastian's belt. Taking it as an invitation, Sebastian in turn grabbed Ruvik's shoulder. Between his support and the help of the hallway wall, he managed to hobble, grimacing, out into the music room.

Ruvik guided them to hollowed window in the northern wall. Ruvik went through first, his shoes crunching the overgrowth in the yard. As Sebastian sat down on the ledge, preparing himself to swing his legs about, he heard the front door of the mansion bang open.

" _Shit_." Sebastian had to grab his shredded pant leg to get his injured limb through the opening. He expected a harsh landing, but Ruvik had him by the belt before he came through, helping to ease the transition. Practicality more than sympathy, he assumed.

It was as they headed through the rear gardens that they were interrupted by a percussive blast from somewhere inside the house, followed by a crash of wood and men's shouts. Sebastian tried to look back, but Ruvik hurried them on.

"Just something I left for them," Ruvik said. "Come on—before they find your blood trail."

Sebastian kept his jaws tightly clenched as they made their way to the property's far gate. Every step was anguish, and by the time Ruvik was dragging him into the woods, he was shaking so hard he couldn't believe he was still upright at all. He put everything he had into his forward momentum, into Ruvik's shoulder beneath his white knuckles, into Ruvik's arm, snaking around his waist when the grip on his belt wasn't enough. Step by step, over gnarled roots and past rotting cedars, until he was half numb and Ruvik was panting with fatigue at his side. Finally, they came out into the field.

A field of dead sunflowers.

Sebastian stopped walking. He had to; he was rooted in place just like when facing down a rusty meat grinder behind the mansion's upstairs doors. It wasn't the same sight from Ruvik's nightmare—it was ragged with weeds, every bulbous flower sagging over its stalk like hanged men, so unlike the brilliant and unending ocean of blooms that Sebastian remembered. But it was real, as real as the blackened foundation at its center, and Sebastian could only gape.

Ruvik's arm tightened around his waist. He, too, was still for a long moment before taking the first step. "We're almost there," he said hoarsely. "But we have to hurry—they've left the house."

Sebastian didn't bother to ask how he knew that; he was far more concerned with the approaching wreckage that had once been a barn. It reeked of smoke and ash almost more than the mansion, despite being even less of a structure. Only a few heaps interrupted with a handful of foundation stones remained. He didn't want to go anywhere near it, but his unsteady legs carried him there anyway. Step by step, through the abandoned crop, until they'd reached their despicable haven.

Ruvik lowered Sebastian to the ground, followed by his duffel bag, and then began pawing through the dirt. It was full night by then, moonlight gleaming on his sweat as he grew more erratic in his search. At last he unearthed an old iron handle, and when he pulled, a wooden door opened upward just outside where the barn's southern wall used to stand. It revealed a staircase made of cinderblocks leading into the ground.

Sebastian stared, apprehensive, but when Ruvik dragged him toward the steps he didn't fight back. Together they descended into the narrow space. The cellar floor was made up of only packed earth, cool and blissfully solid beneath Sebatian's weary back, and he collapsed against it with an involuntary sob. He had nothing left. As soon as he was stretched out in the dirt his body gave up, and he could only gasp weakly after each breath as he gazed into the black.

"If they find that door," he wheezed, "we'll be dead."

"They won't find the door," said Ruvik. He shoved his duffel into the corner and then leaned over Sebastian. "Stay here and keep quiet, not that I expect you can do much of anything else now."

"What? Wait." Sebastian's arms were as weak as the rest of him, but he reached out anyway. "Where are you going?"

"I'll be back. Just—"

Sebastian found Ruvik's hoodie and latched on. "Ruvik." He clenched his fist until it ached as he drew the man close. "Don't let me die in this hole," he said, "or I swear to God I'll haunt you until the end of your miserable fucking life."

Ruvik squeezed Sebastian's hand. "That was always going to be the case anyway," he replied, peeling the fingers off him. "Now rest, Sebastian. If you survive the night, we'll have a lot to discuss."

He pulled back, out of range. Sebastian reached after him, but by then his consciousness was finally failing him. The last thing he saw as he was dragged under was Ruvik stalking out of the cellar, and the door banging shut behind him.


	2. Chapter 2

Juli Kidman's alarm went off at five in the morning. She got up, dressed in her sweats, and set off.

Her small apartment at Mobius HQ was in Block B of the residential quarter. By most it would have been considered a privilege and an honor to be housed with some of the organization's most celebrated agents, but Juli was more interested in memorizing the hallways and exits as she jogged through it every morning. She counted her steps and recited the names of her neighbors in her mind.

Out in the facility proper, there weren't many people about. The normal morning shift didn't start until six, leaving only a few employees at their posts and in their labs as Juli passed. She smiled to them, and received acknowledging nods in return as she made mental notes of their faces and routines. The guards were of a particular interest to her, and she had learned many of their names in the last two weeks by chatting them up when she paused to stretch. Her time with KCPD had taught her a lot about how to socialize with men and women who carried guns for a living.

There were two ways leading to the upper level of the facility: an escalator used by workers, and an elevator for transporting equipment. Their security had been increased since the Beacon Incident, as they were calling it, and only authorized personnel were allowed to use them, at authorized times. Juli had never seen anyone break protocol so she had no idea what kind of measures were in place to suppress intruders, let alone escapees, and didn't suspect she'd have the chance anytime soon. She would have to do the best with what she had when the time came.

She was just jogging past the biometrics lab when she detected a familiar presence.

"Agent Kidman!"

The old Juli Kidman would have pretended not to hear, but she slowed to a halt, letting the man catch up to her. It was Dennis Green, tall and gangly, a brilliant smile splitting his pock-marked face. He was carrying a brown paper bag. "Hi Juli," he said once he'd reached her. "I stopped by your room, but you weren't there. Figured you'd made it this far by now."

Juli smoothed her hair back from her face. "Finally decided to join me for some exercise?" she teased. She noted his plaid tie—always plaid on a Saturday. "You're not dressed for it."

"I need to collect you for the boss," said Dennis, and Juli's heart skipped. "He's waiting for you in his office. Sounded pretty important."

"Oh, sure." Her mind began to sprint ahead of her, but she was quick to reel it in; she couldn't afford to break character even for Dennis. "I'll just stop at my room quick to—"

"No need." Dennis held up the bag. "I grabbed some clothes for you."

Juli stared, and she just managed to channel her grimace into a smile. She'd had a lot of practice in that lately. "How thoughtful." She peeked into the bag even though she already knew the clothes would be hers. "So, did you pick the lock to my apartment, or did my supe just give you the key?"

Dennis laughed. "There's a restroom right over there you can use," he said, nodding toward the end of the hall.

A key, then. Juli did her best to look only playfully irritated as she headed for the bathroom. She could hear his footsteps just behind her, and half expected him to follow her in, but when the door closed it was just her facing the mirror.

There were cameras in the bathroom, too, so Juli was careful to keep her expression neutral as she tidied up at the sink and then slipped into the handicapped stall to change clothes. Dennis was a studious guard dog, she had to give him that. There weren't any undergarments in the bag, but the plum button up he'd picked for her would conceal her dark sports bra.

 _At least he wasn't pawing through my panties_ , she told herself, but it was a shallow comfort. She understood very well the message he and their superiors were sending her.

She still belonged to Mobius.

Once Juli was finished changing, she left the restroom and found Dennis waiting for her. She held up the bag with her sweats and smiled sweetly.

"Would you mind taking these back to my room for me?" she asked. "I know my way to the office. Thanks, Dennis."

He started to reply, but when she pushed the bag into his chest, he accepted automatically. "Sure," he said, though he looked like he was still trying to process some other answer. "Good luck."

Juli waited until she was around the corner to shudder. Then it was chin up all the way to the Administration Wing. Not only was she expected, but everyone on duty was bright-eyed and anxious for it being so early in the morning, and she was shown quickly into the head office.

Juli stepped forward, into the array of irregular shadows. Her superior was at his desk, mostly obscured as was his megalomaniacal habit, right index impatiently tapping. As Juli rounded the armchair set out before him, she realized suddenly that they weren't the only two in the room; Tatiana Gutierrez was already seated on one side, and she nodded slightly in acknowledgement. Juli nodded back and then took a seat herself.

"Agent Kidman," said the administrator tersely. "Do you know why I've called you here?"

Juli sat up tall and straight; she had faced this man down when he was a literal shadow, all of reality bending beneath him, and she wasn't about to be intimidated by anything lesser. But she was also wise enough to know her place. "Agent. Green didn't tell me," she said. "But I'm hoping it has to do with the investigation."

The administrator was quiet a moment, as unreadable as the stone-faced Tatiana at Juli's side. "It does," he said at last. "In a manner. Yesterday afternoon, Detective Castellanos was tracked out of town. Our agents caught up with him just outside Elk River."

Juli stared straight ahead. She wouldn't have been surprised if Tatiana was only there to be her lie detector, feeling for any shift of discomfort on the red leather. "Has he been neutralized?" she asked.

"Yes," he said, and Juli did not react. "But not until after he'd taken out all of Alpha team. They managed to wound him enough that their backup was able to track him down to the riverbank. There's a team out there now recovering the body from the water."

Juli did _not_ react. "And we're absolutely sure? If they haven't recovered the body yet, can we be certain he's dead?"

"According to Captain Morse," said Tatiana, "he took three rounds in the back and two in the head on his way into the river. It was a confirmed kill."

She could see it. Juli stared into the silhouette of her superior and could easily imagine Sebastian's face splitting open beneath a hail of gunfire. It almost frightened her how quickly the scene came into her mind.

"The bodies of Alpha team are being examined now," the administrator went on. "I find it hard to believe that he handled all of them himself, given the situation. We think he must have been working with someone."

"I believe I wrote in my report that he wasn't to be underestimated," Juli heard herself say. "He was never going to go down without a fight."

"Even so." He laced his fingers on the desk and leaned forward. "Is there anyone at KCPD that we should be looking into? His friends, former partners? Anyone that he might have convinced to go out there with him?"

Juli shook her head. Part of her didn't want to ever stop. "Detective Castellanos was very protective of his partner, Detective Oda, and visa-versa even more so. But he wasn't very close to the other members of the force, from what I gathered while I was there. Most of them steered clear. Officer Connelly told me once offhand that the other detectives stayed out of his way for the sake of plausible deniability; if they saw him breaking the rules they'd have to report him, but they'd rather turn a blind eye and get results instead."

"So they were loyal," Tatiana supposed.

"There were pragmatic," Juli corrected her. "And likely still are. I would be very surprised if anyone left at KCPD stuck their neck out for Castellanos." She looked again to their boss. "Was there any evidence at the scene of a second person? Maybe even...."

"No. But considering the circumstances, we can't overlook the possibility." He paused. "He was investigating the Victoriano Mansion. We can only assume he was looking for Ruvik. What do you suppose he wanted with him? And can you think of a compelling reason why Ruvik might be interested in him?"

Juli caught herself trying to form fists. "I can only imagine that if they met up again, they'd be trying to kill each other," she said.

"Very well." He leaned back. "You're dismissed, Agent Kidman. If you happen to think of anyone else who knew the detective who might have been persuaded to help him, or who he might have confided in, you'll let me know."

"Of course." Juli stood, and Tatiana stood with her. She felt as if her ribs were made of steel, and before she could stop herself, she asked, "What about Agent Hanson? Has she been notified?"

There was no making out the administrator's face, but Juli could sense his displeased looked. "She has," he said, "not that you should concern yourself with that."

"Understood, sir," Juli said quickly. She ducked her head in apology. "Excuse me."

She left, and Tatiana went with her. Still tight and anxious, she managed to wait only until they had turned the corner to ask, "Any sign of Ruvik?"

"He has yet to be located, but we're still on it."

Juli swallowed back her frustration and tried channeling it into determination. "I want to be put on the team that's tracking him, under Agent Lim."

"That's rather bold." Tatiana put her hand to the security scanner to let them through the east door. "You're still a rather new agent to us, as I understand. Agent Lim's team is the best. What is it you think you can contribute, after you let him escape the first time?"

"He woke up out of the STEM directly into Mobius custody, just like my orders stated," said Juli, watching impatiently as the lights drew across Tatiana's palm. "A dozen of us were there escorting him, and then he was gone, just like that. You were there, too—you know it wasn't anything I did or didn't do that allowed that to happen. Ruvik somehow tricked all of us."

The door opened, and Tatiana passed through without so much as a glance to her companion. "He's still only human," she said. "He's never lived by himself in the real world. They'll catch up to him soon enough."

"Soon enough isn't soon enough," Juli insisted. "They've never been inside the STEM—they haven't seen what he's capable of, not like you and I have."

At last Tatiana was given pause, and she turned back to fix Juli with a cool look. "Excuse me?"

Juli took the opportunity to lean in closer. "You've been in the STEM," she said. "You've seen Ruvik's mind first hand; you must understand how dangerous he is, and how important it is that we catch him."

Tatiana's brow furrowed. "I don't know what you're talking about. I've never been inside STEM while it was active."

"Yes you have—I saw you in there." When a pair of guards walked past, Juli waited until they were out of range to continue. "And I read the report," she said, more quietly. "You worked in the hospital while Ruvik was there; it was you that warned us about Jimenez and the STEM prototype."

"It was," said Tatiana. "And yes, I worked at the hospital. I'm one of only a few people that knew him as Ruben, before all of this, which is why admin has chosen to keep me here to advise. But I _left_ Beacon to deliver that warning to HQ. I wasn't inside when the first pulse went off, and I have never been connected to STEM." She leaned back. "Whatever you think you saw in there, you and I first met when we left the hospital together with the rest of the field team, Agent Kidman."

Juli didn't believe her, but she wasn't getting anywhere. "All right," she said, "but if you knew _Ruben_ then you understand even more so. He needs to be brought in, as soon as possible."

"Yes, I understand." She turned to leave.

Juli watched her get only a few feet away before she couldn't help herself. "Agent Gutierrez!"

Tatiana stopped and looked back. Juli could only gesture helplessly. "I can't sleep," she said, not caring if anyone else heard. "I'm not sure I'll ever sleep again until I know he's here, safe."

Tatiana considered that, a twinge of something almost genuinely sympathetic in her face. "I'll let Agent Lim know you've volunteered," she said.

Juli let her shoulders fall. "Thank you." Tatiana nodded and then continued on.

Juli returned to her apartment. The brown bag was on her kitchen table, but she ignored it, instead stripping out of her clothes and tossing them immediately into the hamper. She turned up the radio in her bedroom as loud as it would go and started the shower. It wasn't until she was under the spray, as alone as she could possibly be, that she slapped both hands hard against the wall.

"Shit!" She beat her hands into the tile, knocking her toiletries into the tub with her elbows, disrupting the shower curtain so that water spilled onto the mat. "Shit, shit, _shit shit shit!_ "

She smacked the shower head from its caddy, and it clattered onto the floor of the tub, spitting hot water at her ankles. Finally, she stopped, leaning into her forehead as she caught her breathe and tried to collect her wits with it.

Sebastian was dead. It was an obvious outcome, really—she ought to have been better prepared. But she kept playing over their last conversation in her mind, his gun aimed at her head. _No, it's Ruvik_ , he had said. _He's the one._

Juli sank to her knees. If she had found a way to explain to him what was really going on, could she have saved him? If he had known what he was up against, could she have convinced him to keep his head down, to back off and not rouse Mobius' suspicions? She doubted it. Even a fleeting acquaintance with Sebastian had taught her plenty about his stubborn nature and she knew he would never have sat idly by with fanatics pulling his strings and Ruvik out and lethal in the world. She knew that. He had stepped far beyond saving the moment he entered the hospital, damned by his own human decency.

She knew that, but it didn't stop her from aching. It didn't stop her from thinking of all the times and ways she could have prevented his death.

 _No._ Juli took a deep breath and grabbed up the shower head. _No, it's Ruvik_ , she told herself as she wet her hair. _It may have started with Mobius, but it'll end with Ruvik if he's not stopped. I'm the only one left that understands what has to be done._ She pulled herself upright so she could continue showering properly. _If they get their hands on him, they're just going to repeat the same mistakes and worse. I have to kill him._ She raked her fingernails through her hair. _I have to find a way, and as soon as I do, I'm getting the fuck out of here._

"I have to," she whispered, letting the water trace her cheeks. "I owe it to Sebastian, and besides." She took a deep breath. "I'm the only one who can save Joseph now."

Juli finished showering and got dressed. She wasn't expected anywhere in the building until the afternoon, so she headed into the lower levels where the range was located. If Tatiana kept her word and Lim came looking for her, she wanted him to find her with a gun in her hands.

***

_Ruben._

Ruvik stirred. He was cold all over; morning dew clung to his hair and had soaked through his clothes. The hard soil was like ice beneath his shoulder. It was bizarre; he'd forgotten so long ago what cold felt like. He wanted to be rid of it as soon as possible, but his limbs were heavy, so heavy, and he couldn't move them.

_Ruben, it's time to get up._

He was trying—he wanted to tell her so. He opened his mouth but only formless gurgles came out. He wanted so badly to speak to her.

 _You're not taking very good care of yourself._ She was so close that Ruvik could smell the char on her skin. _If you keep this up, he'll come take it back._

Ruvik groaned low in his throat. He dug his fingers into the ground, could taste soil in the corner of his mouth, but he couldn't rearrange his twisted arms and his legs were completely numb. He tried to concentrate on reconnecting the threads and gnashed his teeth with the effort.

_See? Here he comes now. You'd better get up, little brother, or he'll take it from you._

Ruvik shuddered with an unexpected pang of fear and forced his eyes open. He was in the field. The sunflowers loomed overhead, tall and indifferent to him, their faces straining toward the moonlight as they swayed in the rushing wind. All around their tangled leaves rustled against each other, but as Ruvik stared into the maze of stalks, he could see when some were shoved aside by a passing figure. Something was coming closer, low to the ground. He could feel its vibrations reaching out to him through the earth.

_Get up, or he'll take it back._

Ruvik's breath came fast as he strained after every loose thread. The thing was coming closer, utterly obscured by shadow, its pace increasing with every shuffling step. He tried to turn away but he couldn't take his eyes off the sunflowers as they were jostled back and forth. Still he struggled, clawing back into his weary body. The thing was almost on him.

_Ruben, wake up!_

Ruvik jolted with a huge gasp of air, which he then immediately expelled, hacking and dry heaving. Pins and needles rippled along his every nerve as he at last got his arms beneath him. As soon as he was up on his elbows he spat bile into the mud. He was in control again, but only barely; his eyes were sore and crusted with tears, and his pants reeked of drying urine. He couldn't stop shivering.

Once up on his knees, Ruvik was able to take better stock of himself. He was still in the sunflower field, but the ground beneath him was sour, the plants leaning and rotten. Instead of silver moonlight, the first haze of daybreak was cresting the tree line to the east. The wind was gentle, almost apologetic, as it stole from his prickling skin any lingering sensation of another body close to his. Even his unseen enemy had vanished without a trace.

"Laura?" Ruvik looked left and right, disoriented, forgetting everything about his circumstances. His lungs fluttered uncertainly with each breath. "Laura!" He thought he saw a lock of black hair whip through the flowers, but it was only a crow taking flight. He was alone. It wasn't until he had staggered to his feet that he finally remembered how he'd gotten there.

 _It's been several hours,_ he thought, rubbing his hands together as he scanned the area. _Much longer than the last time._ His fingers stung when he clenched them, but gradually the pain subsided from every inch of him, until he was whole again. _Much worse than the last time._ But he was alone, which meant that his plan had worked, and that was what mattered most.

A chill ran up Ruvik's spine; he ducked into his sore shoulders and scrubbed furiously at his arms to rid them of goose bumps. Of all the things he'd gained along with his new body, he hated shivering the most. But it wasn't about to get warmer anytime soon, so he took one more long look over the open field and then headed for its center.

The door to the cellar was still closed. Ruvik let himself in and crept down into the shallow chamber. It was too dark to see anything, but as soon as he was inside he could hear a man's shallow rasp of breath close to the far wall. He felt his way to Sebastian's side—still alive, at least.

Sebastian Castellanos; viewed in a certain light, he was Ruvik's own murderer, but Ruvik didn't feel any lingering resentment toward the man for that particular crime. Sebastian's interference in STEM had never accomplished enough for any true grudge to form. What he felt instead was the rattle of Sebstian's unsteady breath through his chest. When Sebastian groaned in his sleep, Ruvik felt it rumble in his own throat. It was a truly abhorrent sensation, and another of Leslie Withers' unpleasant parting gifts: mirror neurons. So many microscopic mirror neurons connecting his senses in unfathomable ways.

 _Strange, that it only extends so far,_ Ruvik thought, remembering that guiding a needle through Sebastian's severed flesh had not provoked any synesthetic reaction. _Maybe practical experience is necessary._ After all, the last time he had taken a needle to himself, his skin had long since been deadened to pain. His brain had no comparison to draw.

Ruvik dug his thumbnail into the side of his throat. He dragged it across the path of Sebastian's wound, contemplating the sting. He thought unwittingly of Jimenez.

 _"I wonder if you would take such delight in causing pain,"_ the old man had said once, _"if you were capable of perceiving it."_

Ruvik let his hand fall. _What did Jimenez ever know of pain?_ he thought bitterly. _Or of me?_

Sebastian groaned again, and Ruvik reached out, taking his pulse at the wrist. His skin was cold and clammy.

Ruvik dragged his duffle closer. He only had a handful of supplies with him, but luckily among them was an old quilt he'd stolen from a farmhouse on the town outskirts. It took some fumbling in the pitch dark, but he managed to draw the blanket over Sebastian and then stretched out alongside him. Comfortable or not, at least he would be close if the man took a turn for the worst and needed more of his help.

 _Not that it even matters_ , Ruvik thought, glaring into the darkness where Sebastian's face would be. _He's not that much more useful alive than dead. Is he?_ He remembered the thing stalking toward him through the underbrush and shifted closer. _He is strong-willed, if nothing else. He knows a thing or two about killing demons in the mind._ He frowned. _He's still shivering._

There was no ignoring it. Even when Ruvik put some distance between them, he could feel Sebastian quivering beneath the blanket, his breath sharp and shallow in the echoing space. It was almost worth it to kill him, to not have to put up with it. Instead, Ruvik felt up to Sebastian's face and found his brow tightly furrowed; fear and agony had woven nightmares in his sleep. And though the dreaming world had for a long time been Ruvik's exclusive domain, he hesitated. He didn't have to stretch his senses far to know what Sebastian was running from.

He was dreaming about fire. The smell of rotten ash, still inexplicably heavy around the barn's foundations, had crept into Sebastian's tattered brain and was wreaking havoc among his memories. It was territory Ruvik dared not tread, even if he hadn't been in a state of near exhaustion himself, his brain fragile in the wake of its recent episode. But there would be no rest for either of them if he didn't do _something_. Taking a risk, Ruvik squirmed closer and covered Sebastian's nose and mouth with his hand.

Ruvik took from him the smell of the coals, the sting of the smoke. Rather than worry about whatever images were running rampant through Sebastian's mind, he focused only on odor, replacing the stench of the fire with the rich soil of the cellar walls. He blotted out all but packed dirt, dampened to mud by morning dew. It was an old and unmistakable smell, another of the simple shades of life that Ruvik had forgotten living behind asylum walls. Not all of his associations with it were pleasant, though, so rather than try to guide Sebastian into a dream of his making, he simply let the stimuli loose.

And it worked so well. Sebastian's unconscious mind drank up the distraction, and drew from Ruvik's injection vibrant nostalgia. Whatever nightmare had been present before transitioned swiftly into father and daughter on the river bank, bare toes in the mud, earthworms in pails. Ruvik could hear the child's laughter squeal between his ears, and was relieved and pleased with his success. Within moments, Sebastian's breath had evened out and he was resting as comfortably as his injured body would allow.

Ruvik drew his hand back. "At least your unconscious mind is willing to cooperate," he murmured. "Let's hope the rest of you will follow." He settled in once more, mind alight with possibilities as he allowed himself to rest.

***

Sebastian awoke from pleasant dreams into the worst pain of his life.

He thought at first that his leg had been hacked completely off, so terrible was the agony throbbing up and down his thigh. Even the thought of moving it nauseated him. His entire body felt too hot and cold at once, sweat in his clothes in hair, goose bumps on his neck. Moving his head to try and see his surroundings pulled against his stiches and didn't do any good in the dark of the cellar anyway. After a great deal of wincing and squirming, he managed to sit up, and was startled by something sloughing off his chest. He actually thought it was a layer of skin until he had the weathered fabric between his fingers.

 _A blanket? The fuck?_ Sebastian took long breaths as he felt himself out: the bandages around his neck and thigh, his revolver tucked in its holster, hunting knife digging into his hip. He wiggled his toes and a feeling of disgust shook his already tender stomach. "Ruvik?" he called out, but there was no answer. He was alone in the hole.

__

_That little shit left you here_ , he thought, testing his right leg. It was sore from having to make up for its partner, but it had some fight left. Turning himself around was an effort that put fresh sweat on his brow, but once he had the hang of it, he was able to push up with his hands and crawl toward the exit. _Or he got himself killed. Either way...you can't stay here any longer._ He ran into the concrete steps and reached behind him, scraping his knuckles as he dragged himself up. _Get out. You're not dying down here_. His head striking the wooden door made his neck throb, but he clenched his teeth as he twisted on the steps and then shoved with all his might. _You can't die in this fucking hole!_

The door banged open. Afternoon sunlight hit him hard, momentarily blinding him, and he couldn't help but sneeze. _That_ didn't help his throat any, and between the sun, his aching leg, and his awkward position on the steps, he had to stop and catch his breath for a while.

"Oh," said Ruvik. "You're awake."

Sebastian rubbed his eyes. When the spots finally cleared he could finally see Ruvik sitting in the dirt nearby; he had changed clothes into new jeans and a shirt, his plaid blue button up too big for him even with the sleeves rolled. The duffel bag was next to him, emptied of its contents, which Ruvik appeared to be taking stock of. Sebastian expected not to be spared a second glance and devoted himself to getting above ground, making it almost a shock when Ruvik took hold of his gun holster a moment later. With Sebastian pushing with his good leg and Ruvik pulling from behind, he was finally able to sit up on the top step.

"It's almost one in the afternoon," Ruvik said, turning back toward his things. "I was starting to think I would have to come down there and wake you up myself."

Sebastian wanted to scoff, but by then Ruvik was passing him a bottle of water, and he forgot everything else. He drank half of it down on one breath, and would have kept going if he wasn't startled by Ruvik unbuckling his gun holster. He reached instinctively for his revolver.

"You can shoot me," said Ruvik, pulling the straps off Sebastian's shoulders, "or you can take your shirt off so I can get a better look at your neck."

"I wasn't..." Sebastian gave up, instead focusing on passing his water from hand to hand as he worked out of the holster, then his tie, his vest, his shirt. It wasn't until his clothing was in a pile next to him that he realized just how much blood he'd left on them, and how much was still on him. His entire left side was awash with crusty copper; it was in his teeth and under his fingernails. He'd seen corpses that were in better shape. "Christ," he muttered. "I almost can't believe I'm still alive."

"Just barely, for a while there," replied Ruvik. He sat down close to Sebastian's hip and began unwinding the gauze from his neck; it stuck in places that had Sebastian wincing, but he managed to keep still better than the last time. "Are you light-headed? Feverish? Numb anywhere?"

"I am the opposite of numb." Sebastian glanced down at his blood-drenched pant leg and grimaced. "But yeah, I'm a little dizzy."

Ruvik peeled back the bandage and made a clicking sound with his tongue. "It's not so bad, all things considered," he said. "But it could use a fresh bandage." He leaned away to grab up his medical kit, which thankfully looked a bit less ominous in the full afternoon light. All the implements were freshly cleaned and there was a smell of alcohol. It twisted Sebastian with a pang of thirst that he tried to smother by drinking more water.

"This is going to sting," Ruvik warned.

Sebastian clenched his jaw, but after everything he'd been through, Ruvik cleaning the wound wasn't as terrible as he thought it would be. He was able to distract himself pretty well by watching Ruvik's face out of the corner of his eye as he worked. It was different, seeing him outside the mansion. They were so close together that he could tell Ruvik's eyes were bloodshot, dark bags beneath them, and blood flecks in his hair; not quite the infallible beast he had appeared to be in his natural habitat.

He waited until Ruvik was applying a fresh bandage to ask, "What happened to the men chasing us?"

"They're on the other side of those trees," Ruvik said, nodding to the west. When Sebastian tensed, he added, "But don't worry, they're not heading this way anytime soon. They're dragging the river for your body."

"The river?" Sebastian squinted into the distance even though there was no chance of seeing them. "Why?"

"Because that's where they think you are."

Sebastian pulled a face. " _Why_ do they think I'm dead in the river?"

Ruvik finished taping the bandage in place and gave it a snug wrapping. "Because I told them to think that," he said.

Sebastian watched as Ruvik turned away to paw through his supplies some more. "And you can just do that," he said warily. "Just make something up and force other people to believe it's the truth. It's just that easy."

"Yes," said Ruvik. "It's just that easy. Here." He handed Sebastian a red flannel shirt. "Put this on."

Sebastian did so, but his eyes never left Ruvik. _It's that easy_ , he thought, noticing the muscles in Ruvik's jaw tighten. _Sure_. "Where did you get all this stuff?"

"There are a few farmhouses all over this countryside." He handed Sebastian an orange and then climbed down the cellar steps so he could take off his shoes. "One belongs to a veterinarian. I've been able to get by the past two weeks by borrowing and scavenging." When Sebastian gave him a look, he added, "I haven't killed anyone, if that's what you're wondering."

"Not just gonna read my mind to find out?" Sebastian taunted, peeling his orange.

"Why would I, when your answers are always in your face?" Ruvik tossed the shoes down into the cellar and then moved higher, unbuckling Sebastian's belt.

By the time Sebastian reacted, Ruvik was already unbuttoning his fly. "Whoa, whoa—"

"Lift yourself up," said Ruvik, "and I'll pull."

 _There's no point in being difficult_ , Sebastian thought. Holding the orange peel between his teeth, he braced his palms and lifted himself up just enough that Ruvik was able to drag his pants down. The fabric clung to his skin grotesquely, and Sebastian couldn't help but groan as he lowered himself again. "Your bedside manner could use some work," he muttered around his breakfast.

Ruvik discarded the pants and then began undressing Sebastian's leg. "Do I have to remind you yet again that you're only alive because of me?"

Sebastian slouched. When he finally got his orange peeled the tart citrus against his tongue helped focus him a little, but he was still painfully aware of his own vulnerability. He had nothing to retort with as he watched his thigh being uncovered. Seeing his flesh stitched together awoke in him a whole new understanding of how tenuous his survival was, and he shuddered.

Ruvik shuddered, too, and then shook his head. "Two of the stitches here pulled loose," he said. "And there's some dead tissue that needs to be cut away." He checked the incision he'd cut himself. "Looks like these held up a little better. Pass me my kit."

Sebastian did so. He tried to concentrate on eating, but he couldn't tear his eyes away from the grisly spectacle his leg had become. "You said there was damage to the muscle," he said quietly.

"Yes. The bullet came in at an angle." Ruvik mimicked its path with his finger. "Grazed your vastus lateralis. The impact has probably sprained your tendons; you're lucky the muscle wasn't ripped off the bone. As bad as it seems now, it could have been much worse." He narrowed his eyes as he traced Sebastian's thigh with his thumb. "I still wish I could open you up for this."

Sebastian gulped. "Yeah, I'll bet you do."

Ruvik leaned back, pulling a syringe from his things along with a vial to fill it from. "Either way, it won't make for an easy recovery," he went on. "I'll have to keep a close eye on it."

Sebastian chewed his lip as he watched Ruvik prepare the needle and then dab his thigh with alcohol. He made sure there wasn't anything still in his mouth when the needle went in so he could take deep breaths and try not to think about how much the damn thing hurt or what it was for. The burn was incredible, and Ruvik was damnably patient. By the time the syringe was out, Sebastian was feeling faint again. He forced himself to keep eating.

Ruvik prepared the needle for another injection. "You're not going to ask what this is?"

"No." Sebastian let out a long sigh. "I get it now; you _are_ helping."

Ruvik's eyebrows perked, and he looked pleased. As he finished with the syringe, Sebastian finally began to notice that the burning sensation in his leg was fading, and with it, the worst of his pain. He stared down at his leg in hazy astonishment. When Ruvik positioned the needle closer to the exit wound he'd made, Sebastian was all for it, initial burning or no.

 _Fucking anesthetic._ It wasn't magic, of course—the leg still hurt like a son of a bitch. But with the worst of it numbed, he could at least relax somewhat, putting less stress on his other muscles. He licked his lips. "Thank God," he muttered. "But I thought you didn't believe in this stuff."

"I don't," said Ruvik. He finished with his syringe and packed it away. "If you can't feel the trauma to your leg, it'll encourage you to put weight on it once we finally have to hike out of here. You won't be able to appreciate the amount of damage you're doing to yourself." He scrunched his nose. "But you're not going to be able to move much at all without it, so we'll just have to be careful."

When he turned back around, he was offering a pill bottle. Sebastian was so relieved to see a glimpse of _oxy_ on the label that his hands were shaking as he accepted. "Take two," Ruvik advised. "I don't know how long it'll be before we can get more, and you'll want it to last, I assume."

"Yeah, whatever." But Sebastian had learned to respect Ruvik's advice, and when Ruvik handed him a fresh bottle of water, he only gulped down two of the pills. He snuck the bottle into his front shirt pocket, determined that nothing would separate it from him.

Ruvik unpacked his scalpel and suturing tools. Sebastian wasn't sure he was up to watching another round of stitch-me-up, so he instead watched Ruvik's face. It was still surreal to see the calm intensity in Ruvik's eyes as he worked. But then, he had to admit that almost nothing made sense about their situation. He played it back through his mind and simply couldn't understand how everything had happened so quickly, and in such bizarre fashion.

"Why are you doing this?" he blurted out.

Ruvik placed his scalpel aside and began threading the needle. "Because I don't want your leg to rot off," he said.

"But why?" Sebastian shook his head as much as his sore neck allowed. "I mean, you're going through a lot of trouble for my sake. Why do you want me alive?"

"The same reason Mobius wants you dead," Ruvik replied without looking up. "You survived the STEM—survived _me_. That puts you on a very small list, Sebastian. The fact that you did so without help and emerged more or less intact is even more impressive."

Sebastian lowered his eyes, watching the thread weave through his skin, even though he couldn't feel it. "I did have help," he said bitterly.

Ruvik frowned, and his eyes flickered briefly to Sebastian's face. "I'm talking about something else—something Mobius developed to combat my influence within STEM. It wasn't terribly successful, but still, you didn't have even the benefit of its aid. You know too much, and they will do anything to destroy you."

Sebastian growled under his breath. "But I don't know anything! I'd never even heard the name 'Mobius' until _you_ said it. There's no point in killing me."

Ruvik finally raised his head. "When you were in Beacon, did you see their crest on the walls?" he asked. "Leading into the central STEM?"

"Yeah. A red star, with something sticking out of it." He shrugged. "Maybe more. The men last night had it on their uniforms."

"There, see?" Ruvik went back to work. "By their standards, you already know too much."

"This is insane," Sebastian grumbled with frustration. "Who the hell are these people? What did they have to gain by helping you create that machine? This is so fucking—" He stopped himself, rubbing his face; his composure was probably the last thing he had left, and he had to hold onto it. "I guess you're going to say next that they'll never stop hunting us, and there's nowhere we can go because they own the fucking world, or something."

Ruvik hummed thoughtfully as he finished tying the final stitch. "They're not as powerful as you might think they are," he said. "And not nearly as powerful as _they_ think they are. Plus, they think you're dead, which means we're a step ahead of them. As long as we're not careless, we can stay that way."

"We," Sebastian echoed. "We're a 'we' now?"

"Aren't we?"

Sebastian didn't like that thought much, but one look around the empty field surrounding them reminded him of his precarious situation. Even just getting back to civilization from where he was would be an ordeal, let alone dodging trained agents from a shadowy organization. "Yeah, I guess we are, for now." He narrowed his eyes on Ruvik. "But I haven't forgotten what you are," he said firmly, "let alone what you've done. I'd rather us both end up dead than see you back in their hands, or worse, on the loose. If it looks like it's going to come to that, I _will_ kill you."

"Like I said before; you can try." Ruvik began applying fresh bandages to Sebastian's leg. "But I suggest we focus on putting distance between us and Mobius before you do."

"Fair enough."

Once Ruvik was finished and had set his tools aside, he produced from his bag a pair of blue jeans and heavy farming boots. It took both of them to get Sebastian dressed, but he felt a bit more human once he was, even if everything was a size too large for him.

"Compliments of Mr. Harvey Whitlam," said Ruvik. "Never not drunk before noon, even when I knew him as a boy. His farm is just down river from here. We have him to thank for these, too."

He handed Sebastian a pair of Slim Jims, and kept a pair for himself. Having to chew wasn't ideal given the state of Sebastian's neck, but he was hungry enough that he didn't care. Ruvik preferred to suck on his, occasionally nibbling, as he kept his hands free to clean his medical supplies and pack everything useful back into his duffel. Sebastian's bloody clothes and used bandages all went down into the cellar.

"Mobius won't look here, and if they do, we'll already be long gone," Ruvik said, mostly to himself, as he moved about their rough camp. "The revolver has six shots left, the rifle has nine, the shotgun has six. If we go east, we can make it to Finley Road, and from there…" He looked to Sebastian. "I don't suppose you know of a place far enough away from here where we can stay hidden for a while?"

"I can think of a place or two," he replied, securing the gun holster around his chest.

Ruvik nodded as he paced the area. He was starting to look restless as he finally resorted to gulping down his jerky. "If you need more time, we can stay until dusk," he said. "But we can't stay here another night."

"No, you're right. Let's go." Sebastian took a few breaths and then dragged himself away from the cellar so it could be closed. "If you…if you can at least help me to the woods, maybe we'll find a branch or something I can lean on."

"All right."

Ruvik drew the duffel over his shoulders; he still looked awfully skinny beneath it, even with some of its contents gone. Getting Sebastian onto his feet took time and a lot of patience, and once he was there he worried about what Ruvik had said about his numb leg, but after a few shaky starts they were on their way out of the field. Sebastian glanced back once at the crumbled, ashen foundation in its sea of rotten flowers. Ruvik did not.

"I didn't think this place really existed," Sebastian said as he limped along, depending on Ruvik's shoulder for each step. "The mansion, the barn…" He tried to catch a glimpse of Ruvik's face. "You really did grow up here."

"Yes," said Ruvik without meeting his gaze. "I did."

"And everything you showed me? The fire, Jimenez…"

"Yes. It all happened, more or less."

There wasn't any reason left to doubt, but he wanted to hear Ruvik say it. "You killed your parents in that house."

Ruvik took in a deep breath, held it, let it go. "And?"

But Sebastian had nothing. He could only shudder with cold incredulity.

They marched on in silence for a while, shoving sunflowers out of their way as they went. The afternoon sun and lack of pursuers made it an easier trip than going in, but Sebastian was still exhausted by the time they reached the tree line. He didn't want to imagine what state he would have been in without the drugs. Ruvik was only somewhat better off, bearing so much of Sebastian's weight and their few supplies the whole way. When they discovered a fallen tree, they agreed on a rest, and sat side by side on the trunk.

"Got any more water?" Sebastian asked.

Ruvik reached into his bag. "Just this," he said, and he handed Sebastian a lukewarm Dr. Pepper.

Sebastian stared at it for a long time. "This…doesn't seem like you," he admitted. He cracked it open.

"Another donation from Mr. Whitlam," said Ruvik, and he pushed to his feet. "I wanted to know what it tastes like; they only had Pepsi at Beacon."

It was such an absurdly normal thing to say, Sebastian almost couldn't believe it. He watched Ruvik move among the fallen tree branches as he sipped his drink, a tangle of misfiring instincts. "How are you even possible?" he asked.

"What do you mean?" Ruvik found a severed branch and tested his weight against it. "If you're going to ask questions, be specific."

"You were a murderer," said Sebastian. "And then you were a brain, and now you're Leslie. How is it possible you're still alive? Are you, like...." He frowned skeptically around the words. "Are you a ghost or something?"

Ruvik frowned, casting the branch aside in search of another one. "Not exactly."

He continued poking around the branches without elaborating, until Sebastian finally said, "If you're not going to answer, just say so."

"I'm going to answer," said Ruvik. He braced his foot against the tree and pulled, trying to break one of the larger branches free. "I'm trying to think of a way of explaining it that you'll comprehend."

Sebastian pulled a face and took another drink from the can. "Considerate."

Ruvik didn't have much luck with the branch; he scraped his hands in the process and scowled. "All right," he said as he rubbed his palms against his jeans. "Imagine that every human being is a computer. Their body makes up the hardware, their brain is the software, and their mind—their personality, their experiences—is the data stored on it. Yes?"

"Sure." He snorted. "I guess it doesn't surprise me that you would think of us that way."

"And like a human being, a system isn't really considered complete unless all three elements are functioning in unison," Ruvik went on as he reached again for the branch. "There's compatibility to consider. If you have a powerful piece of software, you can't simply install it on any system, and not all software can make use of all data. Human beings are even more particular. But I always knew that it was possible." Ruvik took hold with both hands and braced his heel to the tree. "Possible that two human systems could reach a state of compatibility."

Sebastian's mouth was suddenly dry. "And that's what Leslie was to you," he supposed. "You overwrote his data with yours."

Ruvik yanked, and the branch split with a loud crack. "Yes," he said. "At least, that's the most apt comparison I can think of."

Sebastian cradled the soda can in both hands, uninterested in having anything else in his stomach. "So, he's completely gone. He's dead."

"Yes." Ruvik dragged the branch into a more open area so he could begin picking the twigs and leaves off it. "By all meaningful definitions of the word, Leslie Withers is dead."

"And that doesn't bother you at all, does it?" Sebastian knew he was probably wasting his anger, but Ruvik's uncaring expression was digging under his skin. "You erased a person, stole his body, and you don't even give a shit."

Ruvik didn't answer immediately, and it was eerie, seeing Leslie's young face contemplating his own death. "It's unfortunate," Ruvik said at last. "Leslie and I had many things in common, and I would have preferred not to lose him. But he was too precious to give up. Our resonance was almost perfect. I'm almost tempted to call it fate—that his body was made for me. And his sacrifice has made everything possible." He met Sebastian's gaze with resolution. "If not for Mobius' interference there might have been other solutions to explore, but they forced my hand. In the same circumstances I would kill him again."

The can crinkled in Sebastian's grip. "You don't deserve to live over him."

"You can think that, if you want." Ruvik looked away. "But Leslie is gone. Killing me will not bring him back."

Sebastian noticed the subtle twitch of muscle around Ruvik's mouth. _It's just that easy_ , he thought. "You know," he said, "for a murdering psychopath, you really are a shit liar."

Ruvik carried on with the branch and didn't respond. Whatever he was hiding, he wasn't about to make uncovering it easy, and Sebastian had just enough self-preservation left in him to not push the issue. He shifted his position slightly, testing his legs, but he didn't feel steady enough yet to continue their march to civilization. _But if he is willing to answer questions..._ "We're no longer connected to STEM, right?" he asked. "The machine can't affect us anymore?"

"It can't function without me," said Ruvik. "So, no."

"Then how did you do that in the mansion?"

Ruvik snapped off the last of the smaller branches. "Specific, Seb."

Sebastian scowled and then rubbed the expression off him. "I mean, everything. The hallucination in the hall, when your box-head friend grabbed me. Whatever you did to the men that were after us. The _conversation_ you had with my leg." Wiggling his toes still gave him a chill. "How can you still do all that?"

"It's..." Ruvik stopped himself, his eyes unfocusing in deep thought. "It's complicated. From a medical standpoint, I don't know that I can explain why it's possible. But I do know how it works."

Sebastian watched him closely, determined to know if Ruvik tried to lie to him again. "Enlighten me."

Ruvik returned to his side and took a seat. "You understand the way that your sensory organs communicate with your brain, no?" he asked with a sudden, almost boyish animation. "They receive stimulus from the outside world and transmit it to your brain via your nervous system. Your brain then processes the information and reacts. For example, pain."

Ruvik reached out and pinched Sebastian's thumb hard; Sebastian flinched but didn't pull back. "Your skin transmits to the brain that I'm touching you. But it's your brain that interprets the action as an assault, and the sensation as pain." He let go and moved his hand higher, drawing his fingernail along the inside of Sebastian's elbow. "If I were to sever your median nerve, the signal would be interrupted. I could pinch you again and you wouldn't feel it, because it's not your hand that feels pain. It's only in your brain."

"Okay," Sebastian said cautiously. "It's been a long time since eighth grade science, but I understand that much."

"Good." Ruvik drew his hand back, to Sebastian's relief. "You see, all your senses function in this way. You are only able to perceive reality through the process of transmission and interpretation as carried out by your brain. But imagine now that these transmissions can be interrupted, repelled, and replaced. Imagine that I tell your brain that you are being pinched, whether or not you are. If your brain mistakes me for your hand, tells it to pull away, and I assure your brain that it has...you might never know that what you experienced didn't happen."

Sebastian's lungs cinched with a feeling close to panic. "You're saying you can pirate the signals between my body and my brain?"

"Something like that, yes," said Ruvik, maddeningly calm despite the horrifying truth he was explaining. "You see, the original purpose of the STEM was to join two human minds as intimately as possible. When connected to the machine, subjects can experience each other's stimuli, and especially those signals transmitted by the host. When I was at its heart, all stimuli came from me. You saw and experienced as I wished. Thus was I God of your reality."

Sebastian swallowed hard and couldn't speak as Ruvik went on. "At the time, I did not expect that I would retain that influence, once we were no longer joined with the help of the STEM. But I learned much about the function of the human brain while I was connected. Corrupting and controlling the inferior mind became second nature to me, and still is. I cannot trick your senses as easily as before, but our compatibility connects us, Sebastian." His eyes gleamed. "You are still mine."

"Bullshit," Sebastian said immediately. "You don't control me."

"After everything you've seen?" replied Ruvik. "You really doubt me?"

"It's not possible." But Sebastian could hear the almost manic denial in his own voice. "I fought you off in there. You couldn't control me then—you can't now. You don't fucking own me."

Ruvik's face was still abominably unmoved. He hopped off the tree and faced Sebastian with thoughtful contemplation. Sebastian tensed all over, waiting for any sign of when or how Ruvik's attack would come, because he knew it was coming. He even considered if he would be able to reach the revolver in its harness in time. But Ruvik reached out slowly, touching two fingers to the bottom of the Dr. Pepper, and pushed. Sebastian lifted the can, thinking at first that Ruvik meant to take it from him, but he only kept pushing, up and up, his chin tilting to give Sebastian the idea. Bewildered and anxious, Sebastian allowed Ruvik to guide the can to his lips.

He drank. As soon as the liquid entered his mouth his tongue began to tingle. It didn't hurt, wasn't a threat, but Sebastian went cold all over, paralyzed beneath Ruvik's unfaltering stare. With eyes half lidded and lips parted Ruvik urged him to swallow every drop, and only then lowered his hand.

"Hmm," he murmured, and he licked his lips. "So that's what it tastes like."

Ruvik stepped back, and immediately Sebastian clapped a hand to his mouth. His tongue was still tingling; he squeezed his eyes shut, trying not to vomit, until it had passed. He wiped the sweat off his lip and told himself that Ruvik was just fucking with him, as always—his authority couldn't have been complete. It was just tricks, illusions, and empty threats. But his hands wouldn't stop shaking. He opened his eyes, and despite his best efforts at defiance, he couldn't help but shrink in the face of Ruvik's smug little grin. His body was already resigned to what his mind refused to accept.

"I think this branch will hold you," said Ruvik, displaying his work. "It's sturdy enough, and you can rest your armpit in the fork, here. It may do until we can get you proper crutches." He waited for Sebastian to reply, and when he didn't, added, "Unless you need more time to rest...?"

"No," Sebastian said hoarsely. He scraped his wrist over his mouth one more time and then braced himself to stand. "No, I'm ready. Let's get out of here."

Ruvik handed him the branch. It was a decent size, and Sebastian was able to lean into it well enough that he could get up with only minimal assistance from Ruvik. After a few exploratory steps, Ruvik shouldered his bag and they were off again. It wasn't much easier on Sebastian's sore legs but he would have done anything to put some distance between himself and Ruvik then.

 _Your body isn't just yours anymore_. Sebastian stared straight ahead and tried not to think of the weight of the gun against his chest. _He can do anything to you, at any time. Do not ever forget what he is._

Ruvik led the way, looking very pleased with himself.


	3. Chapter 3

It was a grueling walk back to civilization, and even then, the "Finley Road" Ruvik had promised was little more than a strip of gravel hunters used to cut through the forest between house and cabin. With his back supported by a fifty year old maple, no sign of human life in either direction, Sebastian certainly didn't feel as if they had made much progress. At least Ruvik had left him alone for most of it. They stood together at the tree line, catching their breath.

"This must lead back to Elk River," said Sebastian, trying to get his bearings. "Where does the other direction lead?"

"Breckenridge," said Ruvik. He put the duffel down and moved to stand on the edge of the road. "After that, a highway, I think."

"Route 13, then." Sebastian nodded to himself, feeling at last a sense of stability; he knew where they were. The hard part came next: where to go.

He'd tried not to put too much thought into it during their hike. It took enough concentration just taking step after step. But Breckenridge was a real town, and couldn't be more than a twenty minute drive away. From there, they could go just about anywhere, as long as they could pick a direction. It was time to think of a real plan, a safe place, a means of surviving.

Because Ruvik had a plan, at least for their immediate situation. Sebastian could see it in his steel eyes, locked on the bend in the road east of them. He was standing completely still and his focus never wavered. There was clearly only one thing on his mind.

Sebastian pulled the revolver out of his holster and checked it; Ruvik must have reloaded it with the bullets from his coat at some point in the mansion. He didn't bother re-holstering, didn't try to hide it. There didn't seem to be any point in hiding from Ruvik anyway, and it didn't interrupt Ruvik's vigil of the road.

Within minutes a truck came around the bend, paint sun-bleached, an older man with a baseball cap behind the wheel. Ruvik took two steps into the road and the truck began to slow.

"Ruvik," said Sebastian, warning.

The truck stopped and the man leaned out his open window, confused and curious as Ruvik approached. "Hey," he said, shifting into park. "You fellas look like—"

Ruvik tilted his head to the side, and the man went rigid. His eyes bulged wide in his head as a look of horror engulfed his suddenly pale face. Sebastian had seen it coming and could easily imagine the agony Ruvik was subjecting him to. With his gun brandished he hobbled as quickly as he could into the road. By then the man was breathing hard, working up to a scream, and Ruvik was so preoccupied that he didn't notice Sebastian's approach until the muzzle of the revolver was against the back of his skull.

"Stop it," Sebastian ordered, thumbing the hammer back. "Right now."

Ruvik's posture straightened. The old man's panicked heaving did stop, but he remained deathly still, eyes gaping blindly at his attacker. Sebastian waited, his own breath held, expecting the tingle of Ruvik's nerves twisting around his, or even a sharp pain proceeding his gruesome death.

"Do you really think you can pull that trigger before I kill you?" Ruvik asked.

"I'm willing to find out," Sebastian replied. Anticipation sharpened his fear into grim resignation, and he couldn't lower the gun. "I've got nothing to lose."

Ruvik took in a slow breath; Sebastian squeezed, just enough to feel the pressure against his finger, the cylinder revolving a bullet into place. He wasn't bluffing, and Ruvik must have sensed as much, because then the old man slumped into his chair, unconscious.

Sebastian waited a moment longer, muscles straining. He watched the muzzle stir Ruvik's hair and wanted to pull tight. He wanted it so badly he could already picture Ruvik's rotten brain matter spraying the truck's sides. But then Ruvik stepped to the side, and Sebastian didn't bother to track him. He let his arm fall, and as his tension unfurled, he risked a glance at Ruvik's face.

Ruvik was watching him with the same unfaltering malice as moments ago. "Don't test me, _Seb_."

"Likewise," Sebastian retorted. Though he hated to do it, he forced himself to holster his gun. With one hand braced to the truck he reached inside. The old man was passed out in his seat, but he was breathing and his pulse was steady. Biting back curses, Sebastian leaned back again and took a look around. At least the road was empty.

"Are we going to take the car or not?" Ruvik asked impatiently.

Sebastian flashed him a sour look, but it didn't seem like they had any choice. "Yeah," he said. "Help me get him out of there."

Together they wrestled the man out of the truck and stretched him out on the side of the road. As Ruvik went through his pockets, Sebastian investigated the cab and found half a pack of cigarettes and matches in the cup holder. By the time Ruvik returned with the duffel bag, Sebastian was leaning against the truck's frame, happily puffing.

Ruvik glared at the burning tip. "Do you have to do that?"

Sebastian blew a ring of smoke at him. "Yeah, I do."

Ruvik scrunched his nose, but he didn't say anything more. Instead he looked into the truck and paused, intensely thoughtful. It was worth it to give him a moment to enjoy his cigarette, but eventually Sebastian was fed up. "What's the matter?"

Ruvik chewed on the answer before he could get it out. "I've never driven a car before," he admitted.

"Really?" Sebastian took another puff. "Yeah, I guess not." He tossed his crutch into the bed. "Help me in."

"You only have one good leg," said Ruvik doubtfully.

"It's not a stick—I'll manage." Now that their showdown had ended and settled, Sebastian was finally starting to feel an inkling of victory over backing Ruvik down, and he couldn't help but push his luck. "Besides, even if you could drive, I wouldn't want you behind the wheel if you had another seizure."

Ruvik wound tight beneath Sebastian's eyes, but it wasn't hatred that collected in the corners of his downturned lips so much as poorly concealed anxiety. "Did you think I forgot that part?" Sebastian egged him on. "Back in the mansion? You dropped like a rock."

Ruvik looked away. "It's nothing."

"It didn't look like nothing," Sebastian pressed. "Is it something I should be worried about?"

"It's nothing," Ruvik said again, and he walked away. "Get in the car."

Sebastian watched him round the hood, pleased with himself for having found one of Ruvik's buttons to push. That feeling wore off as soon as he realized he still had to get in. Climbing into the cab on one leg was bad enough without it being his left that couldn't hold any weight. Determined not to lose his brief advantage over his unwanted comrade, he clenched his jaw and yanked himself into the seat as quickly and soundlessly as possible. Ruvik shoved his bag into the narrow back seat and then they were off, putting their victim quickly behind them.

"He's not going to remember us when he wakes up, is he?" Sebastian asked, even though he wasn't sure he wanted to know any more details than what he'd seen.

"No." Ruvik took the man's wallet out of his pocket and started flipping through it. "He'll think three men robbed him at gunpoint." He pocketed the cash he found and shoved the rest in the glove box. "Though he may have nightmares for a while."

They drove in relative silence for some time. Sebastian kept his eyes on the road, counting fallen trees to keep himself focused off of his aching leg and sullen company. Ruvik kept his face turned toward the window. It wasn't much of a reprieve, but the familiar roar of the engine and the nicotine in his lungs did make Sebastian a little more confident. They had the means. It was time to start thinking of directions.

By the time they passed Breckenridge, Finley Street had become paved, and they started to see other cars. Ruvik didn't seem concerned with them, so Sebastian paid them no mind. As they approached the turnoff, he realized that Ruvik was even humming very quietly to himself as he gazed out the window.

Sebastian looked. Ruvik's eyes were soft, half-lidded in relaxation, and his expression was almost pleasant. He had his legs curled up close to the chair, and all in all hardly seemed like himself. For the first time since their mansion reunion Sebastian thought he saw a hint of something other than Ruvik in what had once been Leslie Withers; something younger and maybe even remorseful.

He didn't know what to make of it. When putting it out of his mind didn't work, he said, "Hey, Ruvik?"

Ruvik stopped humming and glanced to him, and though nothing specific in his face actually changed, any image of innocent Leslie was instantly shattered. "What?"

Sebastian tossed the remains of his cigarette out the window as he made the turn. "Nothing."

Ruvik stretched, squirming in his chair. He turned back and forth as if coming awake from a nap and then frowned. "We're going east," he said.

Sebastian continued to face forward. "Yup."

"We're going back to Krimson City?"

"Yup."

Ruvik stared at him, but Sebastian stubbornly refused to look. "I thought we agreed to put distance between us and Mobius."

"Yeah, but for what?" Sebastian's hands tightened against the wheel. "Like you said, they will never stop hunting us. I'm not going to spend the rest of my life on the run, jumping at shadows." He snorted. "I figured you would know that about me by now."

"So we go back to Krimson," Ruvik said carefully. "And we fight."

"Yeah." Sebastian took a deep breath and felt it flicker like fire tips against his lungs. "We fight. Even if it just means taking as many of them down with us as possible. And then…" His lips pulled back from his teeth. "I'll probably blow your brains out." When Ruvik didn't reply, he said, "You got a problem with that?"

He expected some manner of taunt, but Ruvik remained damnably quiet. As it grew to be insufferable, he finally spoke up. "There is another option."

"I can't wait to hear it."

"We go back to Krimson," Ruvik said. "We track Mobius down, find their headquarters. And we rescue Joseph."

The fire fanned out under Sebastian's skin. "What?"

"Your partner, Joseph Oda," Ruvik said as if Sebastian might have forgotten; it made him wish he had a pale throat between his hands. "It's been a while since they took him, but there might still be something left of him worth saving."

"Joseph's dead," said Sebastian, the words stinging his lips.

"I really doubt it."

"He's _dead_ ," Sebastian snarled, hating Ruvik for making him say it. "I was there—Kidman shot him through the heart, he—" He stopped, all his heat turning to ash. "Kidman." He couldn't believe it hadn't occurred to him before. "She was working for _them_ , wasn't she? She's Mobius."

"That's not important now," said Ruvik.

But Sebastian was whirling; his mind raced back to KCPD, being introduced to hard-laced rookie Juli Kidman for the first time. He remembered her cool detachment, the ways she had faked her part that seemed so obvious in hindsight. "Was she a mole from the start?" Sebastian demanded. "Did they send her to spy on us? Why? She was with us for months before we went anywhere near Beacon!"

" _Sebastian_." Ruvik took his elbow; he realized suddenly that his foot was off the gas and they were coasting onto the shoulder. "That's not important now," Ruvik said firmly. "Calm down."

Sebastian gritted his teeth and pulled over, putting the truck in park, but he wasn't anywhere near finished. "Why us?" he asked angrily. "Joseph and I—why would Mobius give two shits about us, enough to sic a spy on us? Did they know what was going to happen? Did they send _us_ to Beacon on purpose?"

"I don't know," Ruvik said, and he didn't look like he was lying. "I was never Mobius—we only ever used each other. They didn't tell me anything about that."

"But you were working together," Sebastian persisted. "You and Jimenez turned that asylum into a slaughterhouse, and Mobius was covering it up, weren't they? Did they help you cover up your parents, too? All those people in Elk River you butchered? The dozens of missing persons cases—"

Sebastian stopped, breathless. "All those disappearances Myra was investigating," he said, and he almost didn't recognize the sound of his own voice. His pulse was suddenly throbbing in his temples, blotting out even the ever-present agony from his wounded leg. " _You_ killed them. You and Mobius made them disappear."

Ruvik licked his lips. "Sebastian—"

"No bullshit, Ruvik," he snapped, dizzy beneath the blocks sliding into place. "What did they do to _my wife_?"

"I don't know," Ruvik said, and Sebastian tried so hard to catch him lying, but there was nothing. "I only know the ones they brought to me." When Sebastian took a breath, he added, "No, she wasn't one of them. I've seen your wife, in your mind. I didn't recognize her."

Sebastian swallowed hard, knuckles white against the steering wheel. He almost couldn't get his voice out. "And Lily?"

Ruvik didn't even blink. "I don't know."

Sebastian waited; he watched the muscles in Ruvik's jaw and neck, thinking he could see signs like before that Ruvik had the truth lodged in his throat. But there was nothing. He rubbed his face with both hands and tried not to let the scream out of his stomach. _Stay sane_ , he told himself, shakily lighting up a fresh cigarette. Ruvik turned away from the match. _Stay sane, you've got nothing else._ A few deep breaths later, he shifted the truck back into drive and continued down the road.

"What makes you think Joseph is still alive?" he asked.

"If he had died while connected to STEM, I would have known," said Ruvik. "I can feel it, when it happens. And besides, I saw him when I woke up."

"You _saw_ him?"

"In Beacon, yes." Ruvik resituated himself in his chair. "I saw Mobius agents taking his body out of the chamber. If he was dead they would have left him there, like they did you. They must have seen some value in him."

Sebastian didn't like hearing him talk about Joseph like a thing, but he was too raw to say anything without launching into another argument. He used the cigarette to help him stay focused. _They said to try and take you alive, back at the mansion_ , he reminded himself. He shuddered. _Live bodies make better subjects than dead ones_. "They could have just as easily killed him later," he said. "He could still be dead."

"But he could still be alive," said Ruvik. "If Mobius wants to salvage anything from the STEM project, they need survivors. Joseph is valuable to them; they won't kill him lightly."

Sebastian sucked on the filter. He didn't know if he still had it in him to hope, but God, he wanted to. "Why do you care, after the hell you put him through? He could have died a hundred times over inside STEM and you wouldn't have batted an eye."

"I only care because you do," Ruvik admitted. "If he's alive and inside Mobius, it means we have a common goal. Listen, Sebastian." He leaned closer, his voice dropping so that for a moment he almost sounded like his old self. "I want to see Mobius destroyed even more than you do, after what they did to me. Inside their headquarters, there's a STEM terminal. If I can get inside without getting caught long enough to adjust it, I can show them what hell really is."

Sebastian grimaced with the thought, but Ruvik continued on before he could speak. "But I don't know that I can get in, by myself," he said. "You, on the other hand, might be able to find your way in and save Joseph, but you'd never get the two of you out again. If we work together, we can get our revenge tenfold and you can finally save your partner."

"And then what?" Sebastian side-eyed him skeptically. "We take down their whole organization ourselves, and then we just part ways? Like it never happened?"

"Or you could try to kill me," Ruvik offered. "Since you're so keen on the idea. I'll make sure you have your chance."

Sebastian puffed on his cigarette as Ruvik's words rolled over and over in his skull. "So you'll help me save Joseph, if I help you destroy Mobius," he said. "That's the deal?"

"It's not unreasonable."

"No...it's not." Sebastian watched the road ahead, wondering if he had any hope of seeing the lake of fire before he inevitably wound up at its bottom. His skin prickled with the heat of it. "All right," he said, probably half mad from hope and fury. "But if we're going to work together— _really_ work together—we need to establish some ground rules. Some conditions."

Ruvik crossed his arms. "Name them."

"No hurting civilians," Sebastian said before he even had time to think. "What you did to that man earlier doesn't happen again, period. This is between us and Mobius and no one else. Understand?" Ruvik squinted at him, but Sebastian beat him to the punch. "If you're going to make people forget they saw us, that's one thing. But no more 'showing them hell,' or whatever the fuck you were up to. You leave them out of this."

"Fine," Ruvik grumbled, as if it were a great imposition. "I'll be...gentle. What else?"

"You stay the fuck out of my head." Sebastian pointed emphatically with his cigarette. "No more hallucinations, no more pirating body-signals—none of that that psychic power bullshit. If I need you to know what's going on in my head, I'll let you know. End of story."

Ruvik shook his head. "We need some exceptions."

" _No_ exceptions."

Ruvik leaned against his seatbelt and grabbed Sebastian's thigh. Immediately the tell-tale pins and needles spread from it to Sebastian's other side, and just as Sebastian was getting ready to deck him, he realized that the pain in his gunshot wounds was gone. _All_ his pain was gone. For a few brief seconds he felt rejuvenated and whole, but when Ruvik pulled his hand away, it all came crashing in again and the car swerved beneath his startled hands.

"You little shit." Sebastian glowered at him at the point of erupting. "You could have done that _at any time_?"

"Your leg could still kill you," Ruvik said, and it shut Sebastian up. "Considering where and how you were shot, there could be debris in the wound I wasn't able to clean. If it becomes infected, you might not know until it's time to amputate, or worse. I can look after your body better than you can, and you need me to do it."

Sebastian winced as he tried to shift his sitting position, but the reminder to his leg was making it throb until he felt dizzy, and nothing was even approaching comfortable. He sighed. "All right, do what you have to do. But _only_ when it has to do with keeping me alive, nothing else. I don't want you fucking around in my mind."

"Very well." Ruvik settled, satisfied. "Is that it?"

"Yeah." He rolled his eyes. "I suppose you have some conditions of your own?"

"You have to stop threatening to kill me," Ruvik said immediately, with more vehemence than Sebastian was used to hearing from him. "You'll have all the time in the world to wave your gun at me once Mobius is dead, but in the meantime, you've made your intentions plenty clear and I'm tired of hearing about it."

"Fine," Sebastian said, but when he realized how much he sounded like Ruvik, he tried again. "Fair enough. Anything else?"

Ruvik's manner changed as he considered, making Sebastian nervous. By the time he spoke, his eyes were downcast and hard. "If I have another seizure," he said, "don't leave me alone until I wake up."

That gave Sebastian pause. He watched Ruvik quietly struggle and had no retort to offer. "All right." He didn't like the hint of vulnerability in Ruvik's tense shoulders and was eager to move them past it. "So, basically, as long as you behave, I won't be a dick to you. Does that sum it up?"

Ruvik shrugged off the strange air. "Seems to. Then we're in agreement." He offered his hand. "We work together until this is over."

Sebastian made a face, but he did shake Ruvik's hand. "Agreed."

They drove on in silence for a few minutes before Sebastian decided he couldn't let it lie. "So," he said carefully, "you wanna tell me now what the deal is with the seizures?"

"No," said Ruvik.

"How often does it happen?" Sebastian asked anyway. "Is there something that sets it off?" He shrugged awkwardly. "They did give us some seizure training at the academy."

"It's none of your business."

"Of course it's my business!" Sebastian reined himself in before he could lose his temper, taking a deep breath. "Ruvik. You've kept me alive. I'm…not ungrateful. And we've already agreed that you're going to keep looking out for me. If you want me to be able to do the same for you, I have to at least know what to look out for." He snorted smoke. "I can't read your mind, after all."

A battle of pride played out across Ruvik's face; Sebastian had seen it take place in the interrogation room a hundred times, and he knew he had succeeded long before Ruvik got around to admitting as much. "It's happened four times that I know of," he said when he was ready, the weight of his voice betraying his concern. "Sometimes I feel it coming, sometimes not. I lose consciousness. The shortest was only a few minutes, but the longest was several hours." He made a quiet, irritated noise at the back of his throat. "Nothing I wasn't already used to, I suppose."

Sebastian frowned. "You've had seizures before?" He imagined Ruvik's brain jiggling in its glass case and his stomach turned. "You mean…back in your own body?"

"Yes, but they're not related." Ruvik held his hand up in front of him and curled his fingers, slowly. "What I've done is unprecedented," he said. "My mind and body are still struggling to adapt to one another. I'm certain that balance will be achieved in time, but for now, I have to be careful about exerting myself."

"Maybe if you stopped trying to scramble people's brains, you wouldn't have that problem," said Sebastian.

Ruvik shot him a look. "Your sarcasm is almost as tiresome as your empty threats."

"Oh, well, then I'll be sure to stop."

Ruvik continued to glare at him. "If you want to make 'no sarcasm' one of your conditions, this isn't going to work," Sebastian retorted. "Because I'm not sure that I can be straight with you and not break the first one."

"You don't get to threaten to threaten to kill me, either," said Ruvik.

" _In any case_ , you're not going to be fucking with people, so it shouldn't be an issue." Sebastian rubbed his eyes; he was beyond exhausted and didn't think he'd be up to sarcasm much longer anyway. "Just...let me know, all right? If you think you're about to keel over?"

Ruvik turned toward the window. "You said before you had an idea where we could be safe for a while?"

 _Fine, it was a stupid subject anyway._ Sebastian cracked his neck and tried to refocus; it was still a lengthy drive back to the city. "Yeah. Someone owes me a favor. No one else knows about it, either, not even Joseph." He scowled. "Or Kidman. No one, let alone Mobius, will think to look for us there."

"You trust this person?"

"Yeah, I do." Sebastian glanced at him sideways. "I'm a pretty good judge of character."

Ruvik wasn't amused, and he didn't retort, which was just as well. They were better off giving each other the silent treatment. Sebastian took another long drag off his cigarette and hunkered down for the rest of the trip back to Krimson City.

***

As Joseph lay dying, all he could think was, _If only he hadn't stopped me._

A bullet to the head would have been a decent way to go, compared to one in the chest. He could have been scattered in an instant, rather than lying half broken among asphalt rubble, conscious of the blood pumping out of his heart with every struggling beat. He could have died with sunset warming the back of his neck instead of icy rain pounding his face. He wouldn't have spent his last living moments alone.

But best of all, his brain would be flecks of mush, and it wouldn't have mattered that it was rotting from the inside.

Joseph could feel it creeping up on him when the thunder rumbled: a sour taste choking him even more strongly than the blood, a stirring inside his skull like maggots. His skin rippled and split, and boils oozed pus into his eyes, into his mouth. Voices hissed up and down his ear canals and his legs kicked in spasms as if trying to right him. But he couldn't get up. His left arm was broken under his back, and his right buried in the stone. He couldn't even staunch his flowing wounds let alone rise as the monstrosity the world wished him to be, driven by senseless, murderous intent.

He fought anyway. The thought of dying one of those _things_ , drooling and howling until his body decomposed past the point of Hell finding him useful, was too much to bear. So he clenched his jaws, clenched his eyes, clenched his broken fists and willed the poison back. He groaned until blood sloshed against his teeth and his lungs quaked on the verge of collapse. He had to die himself. _He had to die himself_.

The invading presence receded as it had a dozen times before, leaving Joseph alone again with his bullet wounds, his burn scars, his withering organs.

 _If only he hadn't stopped me,_ Joseph thought. His glasses were askew, so that through just one lens he could see the outline of his gun, nestled into a crevasse near his head. With one hand free he could have reached. _It's not like he needed me after that_. He braced his heel against the road and pushed, trying to lift his hips high enough that he could work his hand free. _All I did was make things harder for him._ When he tried to move his arm, he could feel bones grating. _And now I'm dead anyway_.

Joseph groaned, pulling as hard as he could, but his arm didn't budge. As he sagged in exhaustion, he felt a fresh pulse of hot blood spurt from his chest and down his stomach, soon to be cooled by the rain. He had to have bled six or seven pints already, over hours and hours. How long could it possibly take to die from a bullet to the heart?

His cheeks heated with a stinging, too-familiar pain, and he whimpered, bracing himself for another fight against himself. _If only he hadn't stopped me._

"Ah, there you are."

Joseph stopped. He could see a shape of a person leaning over him, but between the dark, the rain, and his sanity falling away, he couldn't make out who it was. He had the distant thought that whoever it was shouldn't get too close when his teeth were starting to feel too large for his mouth.

The person crouched down next to him. "I've been looking for you, Detective Oda," they said, and it wasn't until Joseph felt the slender weight of a hand on his chest that he realized it was a woman. "But you just kept slipping away."

Joseph squinted up at her, but he still couldn't see any detail in her face and didn't recognize her voice. He tried to take a breath and choked on it. "Shh," the woman soothed, and impossibly, the poison started to ebb from his bloodstream. "Shh, Detective. He's not watching anymore. It's time to wake up."

The rain grew thin and gentle until Joseph couldn't feel it anymore. The concrete softened beneath his back, and his limbs tingled their way into a pleasant numbness. "It's time to wake up," she said again, and the taste of copper in his mouth turned to plastic. "Wake up, Detective," she said, and his arms flowed out from under their trappings. When the lightning flashed next it didn't fade, stinging Joseph's eyes as the world became bright and sterile. He blinked, and he was awake.

Even half blind without his glasses, Joseph was familiar enough with his surroundings to recognize them right away; he was in a hospital bed, sensors on his chest, an IV in his arm. His chin itched with a rather uninspired attempt at whiskers and he smelled like sweat and unwashed hair. It felt too real to be real, and he kept very still, afraid that any movement would rupture his chest again. When a few deep breaths didn't seem to hurt or reinjure him, he at last felt confident enough to press the nurse's call button wedged in the side of his bed.

"Hmm?" He could hear shoes tapping, and then a pair of indecipherable woman were at his bedside. "My my, look who's awake," said one, and Joseph's ears prickled with recognition. "Detective Oda? Can you hear me?"

Joseph peered into the haze of the woman's face. "My glasses…?"

A moment later she touched his forehead, and then his glasses were slid into place. "Better?"

Joseph blinked, then rubbed his eyes and blinked again. Finally the shapes coalesced into human figures. One of the two was an Indian woman, dressed in scrubs with her hair tied up; the other was a brunette with olive skin, brown eyes behind thick glasses, dressed in a handsomely tailored suit. They were both watching him very closely.

"Thank you," he said hoarsely.

"Take it slow," said the nurse, and she handed him a Styrofoam cup with a straw. "You've been through quite an ordeal."

Joseph used the bed controls to prop himself up enough to drink. He had the fleeting sensation that the water was flowing down his throat and then out through the hole in his chest. "How long have I been out?"

"Fifteen days." The nurse retrieved a blood pressure cuff, and Joseph obediently surrendered his arm.

"Fifteen…. It's been two weeks?" _Is that how long I was lying there? It felt like it…._ Joseph took in his surroundings and found them rather sparse, even for a hospital room. The window was shielded with heavy blinds and there wasn't even a television, only a broad mirror. "Is this St. Vincent?"

"No," said the brunette. "It's not." She pulled a chair closer and sat down while the nurse took Joseph's blood pressure. "My name is Tatiana Gutierrez. And this is nurse Anvi. She's been taking care of you this whole time."

Anvi smiled, and Joseph smiled back, though he was still dazed. "What happened to me?" he asked, watching the tiny blips on his heart-rate monitor. "Where's Sebastian? My partner—is he here?"

"We'll talk about Detective Castellanos in a moment," said Tatiana. "But first, I'd like you to tell me what you remember about the incident at Beacon."

Joseph gulped; already a host of unwanted memories was pulsing at the back of his skull, and the last thing he wanted was to let them loose. "We were…. Detectives Castellanos and Kidman and I were called to Beacon Mental Hospital in response to a disturbance," he said, trying to treat it like any other follow up in the chief's office. "They didn't tell us anything going in, other than several officers were possibly down. When we arrived on the scene…." He grimaced. "Everyone was dead. Someone…some _thing_ attacked us, but after that…."

He remembered everything turning black, cold hands on his clothes, a rush of foul water. He remembered waking up in Sebastian's arms, more than once, and fighting off waves of undead. He remembered a world against him, his own mind and body against him. He remembered the press of a gun against his temple and a bullet through his heart.

"I don't know," Joseph said, almost involuntarily. "My memory is fuzzy. I blacked out, and the things I remember are…impossible. I must have been dreaming, or…."

Tatiana continued to watch him, expecting more, but Joseph wasn't anywhere near ready to continue. She exchanged a look with Anvi, who was finishing taking his blood pressure. "That might not be too far off, to be honest," Tatiana said. "We believe you were exposed to an experimental device at Beacon, which was designed to treat their most…complicated patients. We're still piecing the events together ourselves, but it seems that the head physician was conducting an unauthorized trial of this device without adhering to the proper safety protocols. A wide range of patients and staff members were deeply affected, which led to a kind of mass hysteria. It seems you experienced the same thing."

Joseph stared back at her, trying to make sense of the words coming out of her mouth. "Hysteria," he repeated. "I was hallucinating?"

"Yes, I'm afraid so." She lowered her voice, but whatever sympathy she was trying to project rang hollow. "You're lucky to be alive, Detective Oda. Most of the people inside that hospital murdered each other, and the rest, the good doctor finished off himself. We're very glad to have you still with us."

"What about my partner?" Joseph asked with a sense of mounting ill ease. "And Detective Kidman? Are they all right?"

Tatiana leaned back and looked to Anvi, who nodded and then left the room. As Tatiana turned to face Joseph again, the cold detachment in her face made his skin crawl. "Detective Kidman is fine," she said. "She'll be by to visit you shortly, I'm certain. But Joseph." She braced her elbows against her knees. "I'm very sorry to have to be the one to tell you this."

Joseph went numb all over. "No."

"Detective Castellanos is dead," said Tatiana, and the air in the room grew thin and stinging. "I'm so sorry."

"No." Joseph shook his head; he felt adrift and weightless, as if being dragged into the vacuum of space. "No, that's not possible—that doesn't make any sense." His lips broke in a pained grin. "How could I make it out, and not him? There has to be—"

"He did make it out," Tatiana interrupted gently, her every word less comprehensible than the last. "Of the hospital, at least. But his body was recently discovered. We believe the surviving doctor from Beacon tracked him down, and—"

"No," Joseph said again. It was the only thing he _could_ say. "No, that's....that is wrong. Not Sebastian—not like that." But as Tatiana continued to watch him, that terrible non-emotion in her face, Joseph's throat began to close and his eyes burned. "You're telling me that after everything we went through in there, it was all just a dream? And then he was murdered anyway? That's not...that doesn't make sense, it's just...."

Tatiana's eyes never left his face. "I'm sorry."

Joseph just kept shaking his head. He tried to take a breath, to tell Tatiana again how incorrect she had to be, but stopped dead when a familiar heat skated along his cheeks. He could feel the boils rising beneath his skin. _I'm still dreaming_ , he thought, and he welcomed it, for the first time not trying to fight the angry red from blossoming across his face. _If I'm this, at least that means this isn't real_ , he told himself as his vision sharpened into agonizing pinpoints of light. The bullet was burrowing into his heart; he could feel the blood pumping down his chest and up his throat. He was still dead.

"Detective Oda?" Tatiana stood, her hand on his shoulder urging him back against the mattress. "Are you all right?"

"It's okay," Joseph said, letting her lay him down. "It's okay—he's not dead. _I_ am."

He shuddered, choking on the coppery taste in his mouth. Tatiana turned over her shoulder. "Anvi!" she shouted, but then she was back, touching Joseph's face. "Detective, you need to calm down," she said as he wheezed. "Look at me and tell me what you're seeing."

There wasn't anything to tell her. Joseph tried to say so, but the bullet was worming its way through his lungs, and nothing would come out. At least his arms were finally free. He should have just let go—what reason was there left to fight?—but he found himself pawing at his chest anyway, trying to staunch his gaping wound. He thought his face was going numb, but then realized it was just the sting from the rain.

"Detective, look at me," Tatiana said. "I need you to breathe."

"Can't," Joseph wheezed. Anvi was on his other side; was he hallucinating her nails clawing the flesh from his wrist? "I can't—"

Tatiana grabbed his chin and turned it toward her. "Joseph, _breathe_ ," she said, her voice crackling like thunder. _"Right now_."

And he did. His lungs expanded and air plunged into them, expelling the agony and lead. Every breath came easier than the last, and with it, the poison evaporated from his sweat. Gradually everything became reality again, and before he knew it, there were tears in his eyes.

Tatiana leaned back with a quiet sigh. "Was it the bullet again?" she asked.

Even with the incident having past, Joseph still had a hard time drawing his wits back to him. He blinked up at Tatiana dazedly. "What?"

"I told you he wouldn't remember," said Anvi.

"Yes, but at least he came back much sooner."

Joseph looked between the two of them and felt nauseated. "What are you talking about?"

Anvi took his pulse at his wrist. "Detective Oda, you've been having relapses since you came out of Beacon," she said, with a bit more sincerity than her partner. "This is the third time you've woken up like this. But we are seeing some improvement, so I think the treatment is working."

"Relapses?" Joseph echoed. The words crumpled like sand in his ears. "Treatment?"

"I think he's coherent enough for a real dose this time," said Tatiana.

"Yes, I agree."

"Wait—what's going on?" Joseph watched with apprehension as Anvi filled a syringe and plugged it into the IV. "What is that?" He reached for the needle in his arm, but Tatiana took his hand and clasped it tight.

"Joseph," she said firmly, "it hasn't been easy for us, delivering you this news over and over. Please try to remember this time."

Anvi injected the fluid. Joseph could feel the burn of it when it entered his veins, but then she took his other hand, and both women held fast until the pain faded. By the time they let him go, he knew it was pointless to protest. "Is this…is this real?" he asked, his stomach twisting in knots. "You were telling the truth?"

"Yes, I'm afraid so." Tatiana smoothed a stray lock of hair out of his face and then leaned back. "We'll give you some time to yourself. If you feel the bullet again, hit your call button, all right? One of us will be nearby."

Joseph watched the two women head for the door. He didn't know what to say or how to feel, and by the time he had worked any kind of strength into his voice they were already gone. The door clicked shut and left him in silence. He stared up into the ceiling and tried to arrange his thoughts into order, but images kept flashing before his weary eyes, like film spots: Sebastian across from him, shock in his face; the world shattering into thousands of pieces. And just like it he began to fall apart, bit by bit, until he was sobbing into his hands.

***

Juli had just finished her afternoon rounds when she headed to the medical wing. She had tried not to show too much interest in her former partner, ever conscious of the many eyes on her, but no interest was just as suspicious. So she timed her visits, and so far had been successful in not attracting too much attention to herself. Her luck wasn't so strong, then.

Myra Hanson was standing outside Joseph's room.

Juli slowed in her approach. She had only seen Myra in passing since the Beacon incident, and hadn't fully developed a strategy in how to handle her. It was probably dangerous to try to talk to her without a plan, but Juli's curiosity won out, and she walked up beside her.

"Agent Hanson," she greeted.

Myra didn't respond right away. She was standing in front of the viewing window with her arms crossed, her expression unreadable. There was a time when Juli had admired her for her calm poise, but with the knowledge she now had, she found it eerie.

She at last acknowledged Juli with a nod. "Agent Kidman. I heard you've volunteered for Agent Lim's team."

"Word travels fast. I just want to finish what I started, ma'am."

"We all do," said Myra distractedly. She nodded to the glass in front of her.

Juli took a step closer and was able to see into the room; Joseph was in bed, his arm draped over his eyes. Juli's throat cinched with sympathy. "Is he conscious again?" she asked, fighting to keep her tone strictly professional. "Have they...told him?"

She looked to see if Myra's face would change, but her cheeks were carved from marble. "Yes," Myra said. "And his conditioning has begun. Agent Gutierrez administered the dose twenty minutes ago."

Juli felt a chill. She watched Joseph with new eyes and wondered if she had looked like that, only a few months ago. "I thought the Administrator wanted him for the STEM project."

"He does, but Joseph's not stable. Conditioning will solve that." Myra cast her a measuring look. "Would you like to observe?"

"Of course." Juli even managed a smile. "I'm going to have to learn sooner or later, right?"

Myra's smile was thin. "Indeed."

Tatiana and Anvi emerged from another room and joined them. "He should be ready for you, Myra," said Tatiana. "But are you sure you want to be the one handling this?" She glanced at Juli. "If you think the connection is that important, we can use Agent Kidman."

"No. It should be me." Myra let her arms fall and turned toward the door. "If he's going to remain on, we're going to have to have a conversation sooner or later. Might as well be when he's dosed."

They all started to head inside, so Juli took a deep breath, trying to prepare herself for whatever was to come.

***

Joseph almost didn't notice when the door opened. He had spent the last twenty minutes since the women's departure in a daze, reality nothing more than a smear at his edges. Only the images from his dreams remained vivid, surging to the forefront of his mind in unending waves. His stomach lurched with every unwanted reminder. Even when his visitors approached his bedside he remained only half conscious of them and their droning monotones.

"Detective?" one of them asked. Maybe it was the nurse. "How do you feel?"

"Like I'm going to be sick," he replied before having the chance to think about it. He lowered his arm to his side. "I feel...dizzy."

"There's someone here who wants to talk to you. Think you're up to it?"

"No," said Joseph, but by then a woman was sitting in the chair next to his bed. Gradually, her features shifted into a familiar arrangement. He recognized her high cheekbones, her pale hair and sharp blue eyes. She looked just like he remembered, but he was so sick of hallucinations he refused to let her presence register.

"Hello, Joseph," she said, and the sound of her voice cracked across his brain like a whip. "It's been a long time."

The haze parted, leaving just enough room for a ghost. Joseph stared in dumbfounded astonishment for nearly a minute before he could work his voice up. "Myra...?"

Myra smiled with weary sympathy. "Yes, it's me. You're not dreaming anymore; I'm really here."

Joseph's stomach was still churning, but he shoved against the mattress and managed to sit up. "How...?" A thousand questions and emotions bubbled throughout his chest, and normally he would have been able to keep them at bay, to arrange them into order and handle the impossible with some level of composure. But there was poison in his veins and he had no barriers. "Where the hell have you been?"

Myra sat up straighter. "It's a long story," she said. "I'm sorry."

She looked safe and whole and alive—not a prisoner of a government conspiracy, not dead in a shallow grave somewhere. "Are you...you're all right?" Joseph asked. He needed to understand but righteous anger was winning over any desire for answers. "You're just...back? Just like that?"

"I'm all right," said Myra. "I know you must have a lot of questions, but there's not much I can say."

Joseph cringed with revulsion. He remembered standing at the doorway to Sebastian's office, watching his partner stare at the missing person's posters on the board while their comrades whispered in the halls. "They were all right," he said, shaking around the words. "He was so convinced something terrible had happened to you, but you...you just left. Didn't you."

Myra lowered her eyes. "I had to."

Her attempts at remorse only made Joseph angrier. "Why? _How_? He needed you and you just ran away—how could you do that to him?"

"I can't explain now," said Myra, eyes still downcast. "But I will, in time. You'll understand."

"No." Joseph shook his head and was sure he was about to be sick. "No, I won't, because you have no idea what it's been like since you left, what you've put him through—what _I've_ been through." He tried to shut himself up and couldn't. "He believed in you. When everyone said that you abandoned him, he wouldn't accept it. But you did! You're worse than all of them, you selfish coward!"

Myra didn't answer. She just kept staring down at her gloves, and Joseph quaked, wanting to shake her, to scream. Was it the bullet again, making his chest hurt? "Did he even know?" he asked, even though the last thing he wanted was to know the answer. "They said he made it out—did you see him? Before...." His throat ached, and he tried to swallow back the bile. "Did he at least know you're all right?"

Still Myra didn't reply, but that was answer enough for Joseph. "He's dead," he said, hands fisting in the bed sheets. "Sebastian's dead, Myra. Don't you even care? Or is that what you wanted?" She didn't even flinch, and he hated her for it. "Did you blame him for Lily—were you hoping he'd just kill himself so you could move on? You should have stayed dead, too! How dare you come back now when he's already gone!"

Myra was out of the chair. She retreated from the room so swiftly Joseph wasn't even sure at first what had happened; everything was spinning and buzzing around him. His stomach was finally giving way. With hands clasped over his mouth he tried to hold it back, but then someone touched his shoulder and handed him a plastic tub. He vomited, organs seizing painfully. But he couldn't get the poison out.

"Something's wrong with me," he croaked, eyes stinging and hands cold. He couldn't believe everything he'd just said. "What's wrong with me?"

***

As soon as Myra left the room, Tatiana followed. Anvi looked bewildered, but once she'd collected herself she moved to retrieve something from the far cabinet in the room. That left Juli holding the bucket, rubbing Joseph's back as he helplessly puked his guts out.

"What's wrong with me?" he asked again, shakily removing his glasses so they wouldn't fall. "Why did I...."

"Shh, it's all right." Juli took his glasses from him and placed them on the bedside table. It almost made _her_ sick seeing Joseph in such condition, even more so when she imagined that she might have gone through a similar process during her "initiation" into Mobius. "Just breathe, Joseph. Try to calm down."

"Am I dreaming?" Joseph wiped his mouth, face screwed up in a grimace. "Is this even real?"

"...Yes. I'm sorry." Aching with sympathy, Juli put the bucket aside and helped Joseph to lie down. "Just relax for a minute, okay? Catch your breath."

Joseph allowed her to prod him onto his back, but once there, his brow furrowed all over again. He squinted up at her. "Kidman? Is that you?"

"Yeah." Juli forced a smile as she gave his arm a reassuring squeeze. "Yeah, it's me."

Joseph went very still beneath her hands. "Was it you?" he asked quietly. "Did you kill him?"

Juli went cold, and she glanced behind her; Anvi was preparing a syringe. "No." She sat down on the edge of the bed and leaned over Joseph in the hopes he might be able to see her face more clearly. "No, Joseph, I didn't kill Sebastian. It was...." Anvi was coming closer. "It was Ruvik. Ruvik killed him."

Joseph turned his head away. It was dangerous to say more, but Juli couldn't help herself; she gripped his hands tight. "Joseph, listen to me," she said urgently. "I know you're in a lot of pain right now, but I'm here for you, okay? Whatever happens, I'm on your side. Please, you have to trust me."

Joseph didn't look at her, but he did nod. By then Anvi was beside them, and Juli backed off so she could deliver the medication.

"He's having a bad reaction to the dose, it seems," said Anvi. "Everyone responds a little differently." She glanced to the door and then to Juli. "They may not wish to begin the conditioning when he's like this."

"I'll find out," said Juli, thinking Anvi would start to find her suspicious if she stayed close for too long. Resisting the urge to take Joseph's hand one more time, she left him to the nurse and went into the hall.

The two women were standing close together a few meters away. Myra had one arm wrapped around her waist, her fist at her mouth, and Tatiana speaking to her in gentle tones. It was the most sincerity Juli had ever seen her display, and her ears burned with curiosity, but Tatiana had stopped speaking by the time she was in range.

"Yes, Agent Kidman?" Tatiana asked.

"Nurse Shah wants to know if you plan to continue," said Juli. "He's in bad shape in there."

Myra gathered herself up. "Yes, we'll continue," she said. When Tatiana looked to her with concern, she nodded and gave Tatiana's arm a rub. "Go on. I'll be right there, I just need another moment."

Tatiana chewed her lip, looking dissatisfied, but with one more urging she headed back into the room. Myra didn't move to join her right away, and when Juli ventured a step closer, she saw that she was pale and her eyes were red.

 _At least it means she's human after all_ , Juli thought, not sure what to make of her own emotions. "Agent Hanson?" she asked carefully. "Are you all right?"

"Yes—I'm fine." Myra wiped her eyes and then turned to Juli with a tired smile. "We're not always as ready as we think we are."

Juli nodded vaguely. "I know that feeling, ma'am."

Myra considered her for a moment; Juli wasn't sure how to interpret the gleam in her bright eyes, be it kindness or cruelty. "I'm going to recommend you for a field team, Juli," she said abruptly. "That will take you out of undercover for good. You should consider yourself lucky, that your assignment was as short as it was."

"Thank you, ma'am." Juli licked her lips. "You know, when I was with—"

"Don't." There was no mistaking the cold warning in her voice then. "I know you probably mean well, but don't." Myra took in a deep breath and then headed back for the room. "Come on; we still have work to do." Juli had no choice but to follow.

Inside, Joseph was still lying on his back, face turned away. The women exchanged glances as Myra retook her seat at his bedside. Juli took up a stance near the wall where she could see everything, even if it made her ill with helplessness. But if there wasn't anything she could do to intervene, at least she could watch.

"Joseph," Myra said, and he flinched. "I know I have a lot to answer for, and I will explain myself when the time is right. But for now...I need to ask you a series of questions."


	4. Chapter 4

It was early evening by the time they made it to Krimson City, which meant all manner of people were out and about, enjoying their Saturday evening. Ruvik pressed himself up against the window to watch.

A family was coming out of a Mexican restaurant, two young boys fighting playfully while their parents pretended not to notice. A group of high school girls gathered on the street corner waiting for the light to change; two of them had streaks of neon in their hair. As Sebastian slowed through the congested traffic, a young man pulled up beside them, head bobbing and thumbs beating a swift rhythm against his steering wheel—a rhythm Ruvik could feel through the car's strongly vibrating stereo. He tapped his fingers against the door until the car pulled away, and then turned his attention to the mini-van ahead of them, where the children in the backseat were watching a cartoon on the vehicle's DVD screen.

So many cars, rumbling up and down the lanes and spewing exhaust. So many minds crackling at the edge of his senses as they raced and chirped and tangled. He tried to take it all in and wished he was God.

"Didn't get out much, did you?" asked Sebastian.

Ruvik drew his focus back into the truck cabin that marked the limit of his domain. "Hm?"

"You look like a little kid that's never been in the big city," said Sebastian, rather amused despite being on the edge of exhaustion. "Small wonder, considering you grew up in the sticks, I guess. It's really something, huh?"

"It's something," Ruvik agreed, and he went back to staring out the window.

"I understand why Jimenez wouldn't want you running loose," Sebastian carried on. "I sure as hell wouldn't. But didn't he ever take you anywhere? Even just to get you outside?"

"Do you care?"

Sebastian shrugged. "I'm just talking to stay awake," he said. "I was thinking, maybe you'd be better adjusted if you had gotten out more. Actually seen some of the world." Ruvik could hear him smirking. "If you're impressed with Krimson, you'd be shitting yourself in New York."

"Impressed," Ruvik echoed, irritated that Sebastian had judged him so poorly. He wondered if a man like him could possibly comprehend, and then he remembered something he'd seen in Sebastian's mind. "Did your father ever take his belt to you, Sebastian?"

"…What?"

Ruvik turned back and mimicked Sebastian's careless tone. "Did your old man ever beat on you?"

The wary discomfort in Sebastian's face was worth it. He snuffed out what was left of his cigarette. "Yeah," he said slowly. "When I deserved it. But you already know that, right?"

"I saw a lot in your mind, while we were connected," Ruvik confirmed. "You grew up in the city, a decent kid with a rough temper. You stole cigarettes for your friends, finished more fights than you started. You looked after your mother, your brother, your peers. Your heart was mostly in the right place."

Sebastian's jaw worked, but if he had something on his mind worth saying, it didn't come out. So Ruvik went on. "But sometimes, you misbehaved. Sometimes, your father drank. When the two circumstances overlapped, a reaction occurred. It's simple science, really. You earned your reality. And you never questioned, because why would you? Children often assume their circumstances are universal."

"Ruvik," said Sebastian, sharp and hard enough to be the death threat he was probably holding behind his tongue. "What does this have to do with anything?"

"Why wouldn't it be the same for everyone?" Ruvik continued. "All your friends were just as rough as you. They misbehaved and their fathers drank. Simple science. So you didn't give it much thought at all, until that day at the river."

They approached a red light, allowing Sebastian to give Ruvik his full, angry focus. " _Ruvik_."

But Ruvik just kept talking. "One of your friends saw the scar on your back," he said, and he hoped that Sebastian was there in that moment, reliving the memory that had caught Ruvik's attention so well when their minds were nearly one. "It was so small they'd never noticed before. You didn't think twice about telling them how you got it." He lowered his voice. "But then, the looks on their faces. The _shame_ you felt, when you realized for the first time that their reality wasn't anything like yours after all."

Sebastian grabbed him by the collar, not an unpredictable response, but Ruvik tensed beneath him nonetheless. "You don't know me," he said, his hand shaking slightly as it scraped against Ruvik's clavicle. "Download _that_ to that hard drive brain of yours, all right? _You do not know me_."

He released Ruvik with a shove and sank back into his seat, steering them through the intersection as soon as the light was green. Ruvik rubbed his stinging neck. "If you say so," he muttered. "But you know plenty about me. Where I lived, how I was raised. The isolation and manipulation I suffered. For seven years I lived in the walls of my own home while my father pretended I was dead. Until Jimenez brought me to Beacon, I had never watched a television, or owned a pair of sneakers, or seen a building over three stories tall. I'd never even heard of a computer. For a while I thought I had invented the entire concept."

Ruvik gathered himself up and stared straight at Sebastian. "If you think about it very hard," he said coldly, "maybe you can start to understand what _I_ felt when I first realized how different the world was from how I imagined it to be."

Sebastian shifted uncomfortably, and swallowed, and licked his lips. He understood. "There you go again," he said quietly, lacking his usual scorn. "Trying to make me feel sorry for you."

"I don't want you to feel anything for me," Ruvik replied. "I'm just keeping you awake. You're not going to last much longer."

"Yeah." Sebastian took a deep breath and passed his hand back through his hair. "It's not much further, though. I'll make it."

They drove on in silence for a moment; Ruvik could feel the weight of Sebastian's thoughts without even trying. "So," said Sebastian. "Did your old man ever beat on you?"

"Yes," said Ruvik, the window cool against his forehead. "He did."

Sebastian brought them to the south end of town, stopping in front of one of several small apartment buildings in decent-ish repair. Ruvik frowned at the bars covering all the first floor windows. "Someone here owes you a favor?" he asked skeptically.

Sebastian stopped the car and leaned heavily into his seat. "Yeah," he said, rallying himself. He looked like he could have passed out at any moment. "Just let me talk, all right? We can trust her."

Ruvik waited, and when Sebastian didn't make any move to get out of the truck, he took the initiative. He wrestled the duffel out of the back and then moved around to the driver's side door. "Come on," he said impatiently. He didn't want them out in the open, where so many eyes could potentially be on them. "I'll help you."

"I'm all right," Sebastian grunted as he unbuckled. It still took a great deal of effort to get him out of the truck, leading with his left leg. Listening to him hiss through his teeth made Ruvik's own leg throb, even more so when Sebastian was finally out and leaning on him for support. _The synesthesia?_ Ruvik thought bitterly as he helped Sebastian up to the complex's front door. _Or is it just echoes of our connection? Either way, it will probably get stronger, the more I'm around him._ He scowled to himself. _I should have anticipated this._

Sebastian jabbed at the door's buzzer, and a minute later, a woman's voice answered through the intercom. "Ken, if that's you, I'm not giving you another key."

"It's Cas," Sebastian replied. "Come on out, Bre, I need a favor."

A woman came to meet them, as tall as Sebastian, a few streaks of gray in her twisted hair. Her bracelets clinked against each other as she opened the door. She took one look at them and her jaw dropped. "Good lord, Cas, what'd you do to yourself?"

Sebastian smiled wearily. "Hey, Bre. Tell me you haven't rented that apartment."

"No, it's…" Bre opened the door wider and ushered them in. Her quick glance around the parking lot made Ruvik a bit more confident in their choice; at least she immediately understood their need for caution. "It's empty. Christ, did you get _shot_?" She pulled back the collar of his shirt, noting the blood that had dried across his chest. "Where's your par—"

"We need somewhere to lie low for a while," Sebastian interrupted. "Quietly. Can you help us out?"

"Yeah—yeah, all right." She stepped back. "I'll get the key."

She hurried down the hall to the manager's office and returned with a ring of keys, which she handed off to Ruvik. "Here," she said, "I'll take him. Come'ere, Cas. Can you manage the stairs?"

Sebastian was happy to switch crutches, and Ruvik was even happier relinquish him. "Yeah, I'll make it," Sebastian said, though he still kept one hand on the wall as they made their way to the second floor. With Bre's guidance Ruvik let them into 2B, a single bedroom apartment with windows facing the building's rear. It was well furnished, with stereo equipment piled in one corner and posters from various bands and DJs on the walls. It smelled like smoke and Lysol.

"Camilla's up on 3," Bre said as she pulled Sebastian into the bedroom. "I don't think she's on shift until tomorrow. Should I ask her to come take a look at you?"

"No," Sebastian and Ruvik said at the same time. When Bre glanced between them, Ruvik shrugged the duffel off his shoulder. "I can look after him," he said. "I have training."

Bre looked skeptical, and Ruvik was tempted to _make_ her believe it, but then Sebastian spoke up. "It's okay; he knows what he's doing." The bed was a queen size, and Sebastian sank gratefully onto it. "I'm not going to cause trouble for you, Bre. I just need to keep the kid out of sight for a while, that's all."

"Sounds like the less I know, the better." Bre rubbed her face and then took a deep breath. "We cleaned out any food that was going to go bad, but there are a few things left in the cupboards and the freezer. Martin won't miss anything." She wagged her finger at him. "But stay _out_ of the booze. I promised him it'd still be here when he got out."

"I'd replace it," Sebastian replied, smirking, but then he grew serious again. "Thank you. I owe you for this."

Bre scoffed. "You're the one paying for it," she said, stepping back. "I don't think anyone saw you come in, but if they did, I'll keep them quiet." She waved at Ruvik, and when he handed the keys over, she separated the one for the apartment for him. "Holler down if you need anything."

She showed herself out; Ruvik followed her to the door and then listened to her making her way downstairs. It didn't take much effort to spy on her mind as she returned to her apartment. A young woman—a daughter—was waiting for her, and as she explained the situation to her, it became clear she wasn't about to go spreading rumors or call the police on them. Ruvik resolved to keep an eye on her when he could, but it was looking more and more like Sebastian's judgment was sound after all.

Ruvik ventured into the kitchen. As Bre had said, there were canned goods in the cupboards, dishes and silverware, a few frozen dinners. He filled a tall glass of water and brought it to the bedroom. Sebastian was fumbling with the bottle of painkillers, so Ruvik traded him. "Who is she?" he asked as he opened the bottle and shook the pills free. "And whose apartment is this?"

"Martin Rios lives here," said Sebastian, eagerly accepting the pills. "Joseph and I put him away for theft a few weeks back, in connection to a murder." He gulped down the medication and the entire glass of water. "There's a lot of crime in this area, but it's hard for us to get far without tips from the locals. Bre owns the building, so she hears a lot. But it's not in her best interests to tell us. Not only could she get in trouble for snitching, if we put her tenants away, that's money out of her pocket. So I made her a deal."

"If she helps you put one of her tenants in prison, you'll pay for the apartment?" Ruvik supposed, eyebrows raised.

"Only until she finds someone to take it." He handed the glass back and grimaced as he stretched out on his back. "Martin will be out in a few months, so I told her I'd cover it until then."

Ruvik frowned thoughtfully as he set glass and bottle on the night stand. "Is that legal?"

"Why do you think I never told Joseph?" Sebastian collapsed into the mattress with a hard sigh. "Fuck, my head is killing me." He rubbed his eyes. "Just trust me, all right? We'll be safe here for a while."

Ruvik watched him; he considered suggesting Sebastian eat something, but he didn't seem to have the strength for it, and the prospect of spoon feeding was not a pleasant one. "Do you want me to help you sleep?" he offered instead.

Sebastian eyed him, but his fatigue won out over his suspicion. "Yeah," he said. "Okay."

"Close your eyes," said Ruvik.

He draped his hand over Sebastian's forehead. He opened himself to all that Sebastian was experiencing: the throbbing, red-hot pain from his healing wounds, the soreness in his muscles from the long drive, the stress crippling his overly anxious mind. They were all very familiar to him, and he let them flow through him before tackling them one by one, gradually invading and then easing every fiery nerve. He lowered the volume on Sebastian's outward senses. Bit by bit, he guided Sebastian's weary brain into a cool and welcoming darkness.

Just as before, Sebastian was remarkably receptive. Within moments he was a pile of melty bones and heavy breaths, as relaxed as Ruvik had ever seen him. "God," he murmured, tipping his head back. "That feels…so much better...."

"You're welcome," said Ruvik, and then Sebastian was deeply asleep. He waited a moment longer to be sure before drawing his hand back. He snorted quietly. "You're much better company when you're unconscious anyway."

Ruvik opened a can of soup from the cupboard and ate from it, cold, as he made a quick but thorough investigation of the apartment. There were clothes that would probably fit Sebastian if he could be convinced to wear them, but not him. The television worked but only received basic broadcast signals, not that Ruvik cared to watch it anyway. There was no computer that could have made for a decent resource, no books, only CDs and DVDs. He found a few packs of cigarettes scattered about and at first threw them out, then took them back out of the trash and set them on the counter. Separating an addict from his drug wouldn't do either of them any favors.

Satisfied with their refuge, Ruvik finished his meal and headed into the bathroom. After taking care of the essentials, he stood contemplating the shower for a long time. He hated to admit how much it intimidated him. Though he had always taken his hygiene seriously out of necessity, the thought of that much water beating down on him drew to life images of delicate flesh being stripped away, of the screams of Jimenez's most hopeless madmen as they were hosed down in their cells.

But then he thought of the rain, pattering softly against his upturned face in that moment he knew he could succeed. He thought of Sebastian's dreadful sarcasm if he were there to see him lose his nerve. So he stripped down and turned on the shower.

Ruvik started slow: palms up beneath the spray, testing the strength and temperature. The pressure wasn't so great after all, and soon he was inching more of his body beneath the lazy jets. The feel of it against his scalp made him shiver, and he immediately turned the heat up, closing the shower curtain in as much as possible to extinguish any chill. A bar of soap had been left behind, but not knowing who might have used it last put him off to it; he focused instead on scrubbing with his hands, at last freeing himself of the dirt from the field, the ash from the mansion. He sucked Sebastian's blood out from under his fingernails.

And for the first time in he didn't know how long, he allowed his mind to abandon concerns of survival and vengeance. There was only the water tapping a constant rhythm against his new body, his skin thirsty for the sensation. He drew his fingertips down his face and neck, tracing the paths his scars would have crossed. Finally, he could _feel_. He concentrated on the warmth of the steam against flesh, the gentle probing of his fingers—then the bite of his fingernails, scratching welts along the lines of his veins. He dug his knuckles into the bruises Sebastian had ground in his shoulders and waist and relished their ache. He wanted the hurt.

Because it was his. _His_ pain, not a borrowed sensation half glimpsed through a stranger's mangled senses, blossomed beneath his eager, raking hands. It was as real and tangible as anything could be, and soon he was gasping, made dizzy by the rush of so many forgotten stimuli reminding him of a time when he had almost felt like a human being.

Inside STEM, his mind had ruled as a boundless god. Outside, he was muscle and bone, delighting in the puckered skin of his waterlogged fingers. But he could have both. He _deserved_ both.

Ruvik sat down on the shower floor and drew his knees in tight to his chest. He tried to make himself small enough that every part of him was within the shower spray. With eyes closed he let his mind drift, senses tuning outward in ripples. He remembered those first moments when the machine took him as its heart, the weightless emptiness he had felt with only darkness in all directions, but then, the minds. Frail human souls flickered within the black, and he reached out to them as easily as if they were in their tubs, waiting for him.

Below him, Bre was braiding her daughter's hair the way her mother used to braid hers. Her nostalgia wove with her concern for Sebastian and her mind kept skipping between unconnected thoughts. Her daughter probably didn't realize how much of that simple exchange was being imprinted into her young memory with every gentle tug to her scalp. Above him, a woman was stretched out across her floor, eating M&Ms from a bowl and watching reality television. It was distracting her from thinking of a particularly nasty encounter during her last shift at the clinic she worked in. Ruvik supposed she was the Camilla that Bre had mentioned.

In the other apartments, a man and a woman argued over how they could earn enough to make their rent, while teenagers smoked in the stairwells to escape their parents, and an elderly man used two fingers to type Facebook messages to his grandchildren. Their minds and their lives were open to him, some more accessible than others; all of them were points of light within his grasp, from the woman doing her makeup for a night out, to a man sound asleep with the tender weight of a young body curled on his chest, a tiny heart beating close to his own.

Then Ruvik realized, no, _that_ was just Sebastian in the next room, dreaming of better days.

_Ruben!_

Ruvik's concentration was shattered by a sudden, stabbing pain between his temples, and the noise—that terrible, nerve-warping scream—seeming to fracture every delicate bone in his ears. He crushed a sound of pain against his palm and curled into his knees as he fought against it. His brain stem was fraying; his capillaries were drifting away. He felt as if the tub were overflowing, and soon the glass would close him in, and soon his new body would be numb and dead.

 _No_ , Ruvik thought, shuddering against the tile wall. _No, it's mine! Laura!_

He bit down hard on the meat of his thumb, and the pain awakened him. Feeling soared back into his quaking limbs and he could breathe and think again. He turned his face into the water, letting it sting his eyes. Every droplet settled him more firmly until he was grounded and whole, his body his alone.

Ruvik dragged himself to his feet, scrubbing his face and pushing his hair back. He waited beneath the water until he was certain the spell had passed before twisting the dials. As he reached for the curtain, however, he was struck with the uneasy realization that he wasn't alone.

The thing was waiting for him. He could sense it huddled just beyond the curtain, no more than a blackened weight at the edge of his perception. Like a child he recited to himself that it was only his imagination even as the curtain rustled in his grip. With a deep breath, he flung it open.

There was nothing, as Ruvik knew there would be. But as soon as he drew a towel over his head, goose bumps rose up his shins, warning him that _something_ would be there once he looked up again. _Something_ was waiting in the kitchen while he borrowed a pair of boxers and a T-shirt from Mr. Rios' drawers, and _something_ was waiting in the hall as he poured himself a glass of water.

Ruvik sat down on the couch, trying to work his anxiety into anger as he surveyed every corner of the darkening room. Wherever he looked, he thought he detected movement somewhere close by. He licked his lips. "Laura?" he called softly, even though he knew better.

He got not answer. He forced himself to lie down, nestling his back deep into the cushions, trying to see everywhere around him at once. Nothing stirred. But when he closed his eyes, he could feel the thing stalking him. He could hear the mass shuffling across the carpet, and every time he opened his eyes, it vanished. Every time he closed his eyes, it was back, and closer than before.

Ruvik scowled at his trembling hands and returned to the bedroom.

Sebastian was still fast asleep. Ruvik glared at him for several minutes and still couldn't figure out why he'd come in at all. He busied himself with divesting Sebastian of his gun holster and hunting knife, then his socks and shoes, then his pants. Sebastian grumbled something at one point but he didn't stir, speaking only to his dreams. He reeked of sweat and blood, and it put Ruvik strangely at ease; there was no forgetting the physical realm when its odor was so strong.

Ruvik collected his kit from the duffel bag, gathered a towel and a damp washcloth from the bathroom. Tending to Sebastian's wound gave him focus, for a time. He was so familiar with damaged skin and healing sutures that he felt more like himself. Not having Sebastian awake to complain was a significant advantage. But once he'd finished, and there was nothing more to do and no energy left to do it with, Ruvik's mind began to wander again. The thing was still just beyond the bedroom door.

Ruvik covered Sebastian with a sheet and then sat back down on the bed. He couldn't _not_ sleep. Having a body meant upkeep that he had managed to forget about for a time; he was sore and tired and they had so far left to go.

So he lied down, his back to Sebastian, and closed his eyes. He let the man's heavy breathing become his metronome and inhaled the sour air into his lungs. He willed the heat of the body against his shoulder blades to keep him grounded. His last thoughts were that at least if Leslie did catch up to him, Sebastian of all people would end that quickly. He would still have one last vessel to retreat to.

It gave him comfort, and he slept.

***

When Sebastian awoke the next morning, it was piece by piece. His mind and memory came first, reminding him of all that had occurred in the last two days, long before he was able to open his eyes. The room was still dark even with the far window open; gradually the sound and smell of rain rustled his weary senses. Then came the pain, hot and seething in his healing wounds, deep and aching in his overworked muscles and joints, but still not nearly as agonizing as they had been. He felt rested and energized in a way he had almost forgotten was possible. Finally, as he came fully awake, he realized he wasn't alone on the bed.

Ruvik was asleep next to him. His back was turned and his knees were drawn in tight. Sebastian watched him for a moment, wary but curious. He tried to sit up without disturbing the mattress, thinking he might be able to catch a glimpse of his face, though to what end he wasn't entirely sure. It didn't work, anyway; as soon as Sebastian started to move, Ruvik snapped awake.

"Hey," said Sebastian, pushing up against his elbows.

Ruvik sat up and kept his back to Sebastian as he stretched his shoulders and knees. "I trust you slept well," he said tersely, as if irritated that Sebastian had caught him in the bed.

"Yeah." Sebastian relaxed into the headboard. "I hate to admit it," he said, "but that was probably the best damn night of sleep I've ever gotten. I feel pretty good, all things considered."

"You're welcome," said Ruvik, and he stood, grimacing with the effort. When he lifted his T-shirt to wipe his face, it pulled up just enough to make visible the bruises on his hip where Sebastian had clutched at him during his first set of stitches.

Sebastian frowned. "Looks like you can't say the same." It was weird to ask, but he did it anyway. "Are you all right?"

"Fine." Ruvik didn't look at him as he moved around the bed and headed for the door. "I'll find us something to eat."

Sebastian watched him go and then sighed. "Prickly little shit," he muttered, but he couldn't work up any temper. He was starving and sore, but his head hadn't felt so clear since before Beacon, and he knew who he owed that to. Hard to even complain about waking up half stripped, under the circumstances.

Getting from the bedroom to the kitchen was a challenge, but thankfully the apartment wasn't that large. By the time he'd managed to hop-limp to a chair at the table, Ruvik was passing him a pair of microwaved burritos on a plate, along with a glass of water. He might have said something about the quality of the food, but Sebastian didn't hear; he was already wolfing breakfast down.

"Even if we don't plan on staying here long, we'll need to get some supplies," Ruvik said as he opened a can of peaches. "There's not much food left after this, and you'll have to keep your strength up. We do have some money, thanks to that man on the road, but neither of us is in a position to do any shopping."

Sebastian drank down half the glass of water; his stomach complained but he was still thirsty. "You took the bullets out of my coat but not my wallet? Why didn't you just bring the whole thing?"

"The bullets were more immediately relevant," said Ruvik, picking peach bits out of the can with his fingers. "And I was trying to convince Mobius you're dead. It made more sense that you left things behind as you fled for your life."

Sebastian watched him eat for a moment, an uneasy feeling in his chest. He remembered the apparitions of a young Ruvik, and he imagined him stealing what food he could from a house determined to deny his existence, eating it in hiding behind the fireplace. He cleared his throat. "Sure, I get it." He started on the second burrito. "I really liked that coat, though."

"I know." When Ruvik got to the bottom of the can, he dumped out the last slice of peach on Sebastian's plate. "But sentimental value isn't going to help us against Mobius."

Sebastian looked the peach slice over, thinking maybe something was wrong with it, before Ruvik's expectant look convinced him it was actually an offering. With a shrug he ate it. "What will? I don't even know where to start. Myra left me some leads, but they're all dead ends."

Ruvik considered as he sucked the juice from his fingers. He looked like he already had the answer but was reluctant to share. Only after he had tossed the can away did he sit back down and face Sebastian. "We need to go back to Beacon," he said.

Sebastian went tight and half choked on his breakfast. He wiped his mouth. "Why?"

"Mobius may be full of deluded narcissists," Ruvik explained, completely without irony, "but there are plenty of them, and they're well equipped. Considering it's just two of us against them, our only chance is to take them out all at once, and our only chance of _that_ is using their STEM terminal against them. Unless you have a better idea."

Sebastian continued to eat at a much slower pace; his appetite was quickly waning. "I don't like it," he said. "You rebuilding STEM." He scowled. "But if Mobius has more spies in KCPD, we can't go to anyone on the force without putting them in harm's way. And the feds were already looking at me as a suspect, so…no, I don't have a better idea yet."

Ruvik nodded. "The terminal is incomplete without a core," he continued. "Mobius will have harvested the one from Beacon, and probably rendered it useless by now with their amateurish tinkering. But with some equipment from my lab, I should be able to create a new core I can use to take control of the terminal."

Sebastian forced himself to finish off the burrito and then took another long drink. "Won't Mobius have raided your lab by now, too? Not to mention the FBI. They've been carting things off in trucks all this time."

"I built a secret room off the lab," said Ruvik. He moved his fingertip against the table, tracing the layout. "It was…special. Anyone who tried to breach it without me would have been killed." He raised an eyebrow. "You would have heard about that if it happened, no?"

Sebastian frowned thoughtfully as he leaned back. "Not necessarily. The feds pulled rank on us, locked us out of Beacon as soon as they could. I don't remember any emergency crews going out there after that first day, but…." He straightened up again. "Wait—what day is it?"

"Sunday. Why?"

"Shit." Sebastian scratched his whiskers as he considered their suddenly limited options. "Then we'll have to go tonight. The FBI promised Remington they'd let us back in come Monday morning. Once KCPD is on the scene it'll be a lot harder for us to get in and out unseen."

"But until then, it's the FBI," said Ruvik. "You think less of them than your local police?"

"Of course I do," Sebastian said immediately. "They don't know what they're up against, and besides, a lot of good cops died in that building. KCPD will rip that place apart, and I don't want any of them stumbling onto your death traps."

"If you say so," replied Ruvik, and Sebastian wondered briefly if smacking him across the face counted as breaking the conditions he'd agreed to. "But I don't know about you being able to make it through Beacon now. You still need to recover." He wrinkled his nose. "I can go tonight, by myself."

"No. You're not going alone."

Ruvik sighed with irritation. "You're in no condition to keep up."

"You're not going _anywhere_ alone," Sebastian insisted. "Don't worry about me—I'll keep up." Determined to prove it, he stood and carried his dishes to the sink; the three steps it took had his teeth aching as he bite back any sound of pain, but he did make it. "We'll give some of the money we have to Bre," he said, leaning against the counter. "There's a grocer down the street that delivers; she can call in for some supplies for us. We can rest up here, swap out the license plate on the truck so we can keep using it for a while longer. When it gets dark, we go to Beacon. I doubt the feds will hang around into the night their last day."

Maybe he was imagining it, but Ruvik looked relieved. "Very well. In that case, you should go back to sleep. I can speak to Bre." When Sebastian pulled a face, he added, "You did say I needed to get out more, didn't you?"

Sebastian rolled his eyes. "Okay, fine. We'll come up with a list and you can take it to Bre. Just be…nice. She's a good woman."

"I do, occasionally, manage to exercise impulse control," said Ruvik as he retrieved a few scraps of paper and a pen from a nearby drawer. "She'll be fine."

"Leave the sarcasm to me, all right?" Sebastian rejoined him at the table. "You're terrible at it."

Together they counted out the stolen money and came up with a grocery list. As Ruvik got redressed and left to make the request of Bre, Sebastian hobbled into the bathroom. He hated having to sit down to piss. Giving himself a sponge bath in a stranger's bathroom wasn't much of a picnic, either, but it felt damn good to get the rest of the blood off him, to say nothing of the dirt and sweat as well. Even in a borrowed T-shirt and boxers he felt much more like himself, and as he flopped down into bed again, Ruvik returned.

"Bre gave me this," Ruvik said, balancing an aluminum crutch against the wall near the bed. "She had it left over from a foot injury, and lets people around the building borrow it when they need it."

"Great." Sebastian stretched his back against the mattress. "Wake me up when it's time for lunch, all right?" he said, closing his eyes. "I'm still starving."

"All right."

Ruvik's footsteps moved away, but before they could get too far, Sebastian peeled his eye open again. "Hey." When Ruvik stopped to look back, he almost lost his nerve. "Would you…do that thing again?" he asked carefully, very aware that he might soon regret it. He tapped his forehead. "Whatever you did?"

Ruvik didn't react at first, and Sebastian hoped to God he wasn't waiting for a "please," but then without a word he came back and touched his hand to Sebastian's forehead. As before, the world quickly grew cool and quiet. Sebastian sighed, imagining himself sinking into familiar water. The tingling in his neck and thigh was even pleasant as it removed pain from his body's vocabulary. He felt weightless, and peaceful, and safe. He hadn't expected that Ruvik could even comprehend sensations like that let alone bestow them.

"Thanks," he mumbled, and his lights went out.

***

"Sebastian took me fishing once," said Joseph. "Years ago, right around when Lily started walking. He and his brother inherited a cabin from their father, you know? Up river? Sometimes I think everyone born here has a little cabin on the river somewhere. He invited me out for the weekend, to go fishing."

"That sounds nice," said Tatiana, drawing the needle from his arm.

"It was just the once, though." He chuckled even as his stomach turned. "I was really terrible at it. Which is a strange thing to say, I suppose. Catching something or not should depend on the fish as much as skill, when you think about it. But I was _terrible_. I think Lily caught more fish than me."

"I've never been fishing," said Tatiana, packing the syringe away. "I wouldn't know."

"I've been out to the cabin a couple times since then, but not to fish," Joseph went on. Tatiana started tightening the restraints around his wrists, but something prevented him from caring. "I think I complained too much, and Sebastian took the hint. I regretted that, later. I looked back and thought, maybe it wasn't so bad. I should have given it another shot. But after the fire…."

Tatiana buckled his ankles to the wheelchair. "A shame, what happened."

"It kept me up last night." Joseph lowered his eyes; the memories were so close to his surface, bright and muddy like children's finger-paintings. "Of all the things to get hung up on. I'd wake up and think, 'I should tell Sebastian I want to try fishing again.' And then I'd start thinking about when a good time to go would be, and I'd remember…."

Tatiana gave his hand a brief squeeze. "Loss is hard on all of us, Joseph."

"Is it, though?" The drug burned through his system and made everything brighter still, and yet somehow even less distinct. "I'm not sure that Myra cares at all."

Tatiana grabbed him by the chin, and he startled, trying to focus on her face. All he could make out was the red of her lipstick. "She cares," she said firmly. "More than you'll ever know."

There was a knock on the door, and Tatiana let go as Myra stepped through. He knew it was her because of the light glinting off her earrings; the rest of her was a blur of blue-green surgical scrubs. "Hello, Joseph," she greeted. "How are you feeling today?"

"Terrible," Joseph admitted. He couldn't lie to her. He couldn't even remember if he'd ever been able to. "Whatever you keep giving me, I don't think it's working."

"It's working," said Myra, moving closer. "I know it doesn't make much sense now, but it will. That's what today is all about." She looked to Tatiana. "Is everything ready?"

"Yes, we're ready, except...he doesn't think you care, Myra."

Myra was quiet a moment, and Joseph found himself sinking back into the wheelchair. Her hand clasping his was tight and cold. "I care, Joseph," she told him firmly. "More than you'll ever know."

 _She cares_. Joseph could still see only a shadow of her face, but her voice was piercing, aching along his veins. _She cares more than I'll ever know_. "I know," he said.

"There," said Tatiana, moving around behind him. "It's working."

Myra stepped aside so that she could start wheeling him out of the room. Joseph frowned up at the hallway lights. "What's working?"

"Don't worry about it now," said Myra, walking at his side as they continued on. "Just trust me; you'll start to feel more like yourself in no time."

They were joined by a pair of guards with guns, who fell into step ahead and behind them. Joseph didn't pay them any mind. _I'll feel like myself in no time_ , he thought, and he believed it.

***

Juli was on her way to Joseph's room when she came across the small procession heading down the hall. Joseph was at the center, restrained in a wheelchair, armed guards along, but it was Myra and Tatiana dressed for surgery that made her hair stand on end. She moved to the side to let them through and then fell into step beside Myra.

"What's going on?" she asked. "I thought we had another session today."

"Today is a little bit different," said Myra, not looking at her. "You're not needed for this stage, Agent Kidman."

Juli glanced to Joseph; his eyes were closed, breathing slowly like he was trying to keep from being sick. He'd already been heavily dosed again. "I thought you were involving me in this process so I could learn," she said. "Shouldn't I be observing?"

"Not this part."

"This is the least pleasant part of the conditioning," added Tatiana. "Better that you spare yourself."

Anxiety cinched the edges of Juli's lungs. "I'm not worried about pleasantries," she said. "This is my job, and Detective Oda—"

"Juli." Myra took her by the wrist, halting them both. "I'm doing you a favor," she said as Tatiana and the guards continued on, Joseph in tow. "You don't want to see this. Trust me."

Juli cycled through every angle she could work from, trying to think of some way of expressing professional curiosity and not the panic creeping up her spine. "Agent Hanson," she said carefully. "I appreciate what you're doing, what you've done for me, but...."

Myra looked away, and Juli couldn't help but follow her gaze to the room at the end of the hall that the rest of the procession was continuing toward. A man was waiting for them in the open doorway, dressed in a tailored suit. The medical wing's sterile lighting offered her a perfect look of his face: deep lines, dark eyes, heavy brows. It was not a face she'd often glimpsed in the waking world but it perfectly matched her otherworldly memory of it. He acknowledged her with a slight incline of his head. She almost expected shadows to peel away from the walls, and her hands ached for a gun.

Myra let go of her wrist. "You're dismissed, Agent Kidman," she said, moving to rejoin her group.

Juli followed a few steps. She was able to catch glimpse of more people inside the room, also dressed in scrubs, and what looked like a defibrillator pushed up against the wall. Joseph lifted his head. She heard him say, "Wait, what is _that_?" but by then Myra had caught up, and with one last glance at Juli, the Administrator closed the door.

Juli stood in the hall. She felt it stretch out in front of her, impossibly long like something out of a horror film, straining her ears for any hint of the unseen events taking place beyond the door. Her entire body was rooted to the spot and she could barely breathe as the seconds ticked by. She heard nothing. It was somehow worse than if there'd been screaming, and resolution thrummed through her: _I can't let this happen._

She went to the range as swiftly as she could without running outright. She would only be able to check out one weapon at a time, but one was all she needed. Hell, she'd survived with less than that. If she could get her hands on a fire extinguisher, she could shoot it open in the lab and cause enough confusion to take out the pair of guards. The doctors and nurses were only that, they wouldn't put up a fight. She might be able to catch Myra by surprise, knock her out without killing her, but Tatiana and the Administrator would each need a bullet. She could do it, if she was fast enough, and she felt fast. She felt _manic._

From then it would depend on what state Joseph was in. If he could run, they would have to go down three hallways, up one staircase, a left, a right, and finally make it through the exit checkpoint. They could make it, if Joseph could run.

If he couldn't….

Juli entered the range and moved to the near wall, where a window of bullet-proof glass separated it from the adjoining armory. They were pretty familiar with her, so she didn't bother to hide her impatience as she leaned against the opening. "Gimme a .45," she said. "I want to try something bigger today."

The man behind the window had his back to her, and she didn't recognize his thick, black head of hair. "I thought you might," he said, and all the lights went out.

With the sudden darkness came a rush of cold. There were no windows on the range or armory, leaving everything in pitch black except for the red of an exit sign. Juli knew darkness like this. Every night she remembered spots of warm, angry light glowing in the black, the shadows cast on shadows that made depth and shape so impossible to read. Her pulse staggered, and when she felt leather against her wrist she was half convinced she'd lost her mind to delusion.

The yank that followed was definitely real. A steel grip wrenched her up against the window, cutting her lip against her teeth and bloodying her nose. It crossed her mind that her arm was about to be ripped from the socket, but then she heard the click of a Glock hammer being thumbed back. Her adversary was only human. With her knee against the wall she relaxed her hand as much as she could and pulled back with the strength of her shoulder; she slid right out of his grasp and fell back, landing on her ass.

"What the fuck are you doing?" Juli hollered as she sprang to her feet. It was stupid—she knew what was going on. Mobius knew. They had her—she was fucked. Somehow they had anticipated her, or had known all along she planned to turn on them, and there probably wasn't any way out anymore.

The man wasn't in the window. She could hear him using his keycard to open the security door between the two rooms. If the exit wasn't locked there were probably already armed guards beyond it, and the red light was just enough to illuminate anyone trying to hide in one of the booths, so there was only one option: she jumped through the nearest opening, onto the range itself.

She heard the door open, and then nothing. No footsteps. But the exit door wasn't opening, either, which meant he hadn't called for backup. Maybe he thought he could take her alone and was scanning the booths, hoping to find her cowering.

 _Not this time, asshole_. Juli crawled along the edge of the booths, away from the door; escaping the range wouldn't do her any good without a weapon anyway, and hopefully her attacker would expect her to make that mistake. There was a chance she could get behind him, get the Glock away from him.

She hadn't gone far enough when she heard the man climbing over the booth next to the exit. She turned, catching only a glimpse of his outline in the dim light, but when his head turned toward her, she could have sworn his eyes glowed green.

 _Is this real?_ It would take too long to cross back over, and make too much noise; Juli retreated down the shooting range, further away from the light. _How did he get all the way down there? I didn't hear him move at all._ She remembered Joseph and his relapses, and suddenly couldn't shake the feeling that at any moment the world around her would twist, and that a blaze of piercing light would engulf her. The blood in her mouth only convinced her more. She was being hunted.

The man was heading her way. She still couldn't hear him, but she sensed his approach. Before she could decide on a plan, he fired; five shots echoed in the empty chamber, and she felt one of the paper targets close to her head shudder with an impact. She held very still, expecting a bullet for her head at any moment, but the room was silent again.

 _He can't see me._ Juli took a deep breath and braced herself. _I can't see or hear him, but he can't find me, either._ She closed her eyes. _He doesn't know darkness like I do._

She waited, patient and silent, until she knew he was close. It was only a whisper that gave him away: a flutter of paper when he brushed aside the target to her right. Instantly she had a picture in her mind of his body, nudging the target out of his way using his gun hand. Taking advantage, she threw herself into him, jabbing her elbow as hard as she could into his ribs.

The man staggered, but not nearly enough. Juli could tell from the weight of him that it wasn't worth it to try to grapple with him for the gun. Instead she ran back the way she had come, her heels clacking. As she clambered over a booth she felt the man just behind her, and she only had enough time to reach the security door before she was caught.

He wrapped his arm around her neck, like she knew he would. The Glock dug into her waist. He had height and strength over her, but he made the mistake of not killing her immediately. Instead he leaned into her ear; his voice was like lead. "Those heels will have to go," he said. "They led me right to you."

"Yeah," Kidman spat back. "I know."

She shoved the muzzle of the gun just enough to clear her stomach, and at the same time stomped her heel into his foot as hard as she could. The reverberation that spread up her ankle could have only indicated his bones breaking. He deserved it for trying to cover his footsteps by pursuing her in his socks. He cried out and reeled back, giving her time to yank the keycard off his lapel. With a swipe she was bursting into the armory, slamming the door behind her.

 _Gun, gun_. Juli ran to the wall, but everything was encased. As she felt around for a key reader, she heard something crash behind her that sounded like the wall giving way. _How the hell could he—?_ Her hands stumbled over a slot, but by the time she was fitting the card in, her attacker had her by the back of the neck.

She swung about with elbow again, but he was ready for her. They grappled roughly against the wall as he tried to keep her pinned and she struggled free, clawing his hands off her. But he had too much leverage, and she knew she wouldn't be able to hold him off much longer. When she didn't feel a holster across his chest she reached for his belt, discovering and freeing his pistol.

He caught on right away, and another swift battle ensued as they fought for control of the weapon. Even when she sank her teeth into his knuckles he grunted but didn't relent, using the superior weight of his body to shove her hard into the gun cases at her back. The absolute darkness that had once been her ally was suddenly disorienting as the back of her skull struck hard against the glass. The Glock's muzzle was digging into her chin.

The man let out a long breath. He braced his feet firmly against each of hers to prevent her from using her knees, and he had her one arm pinned over her head, the other trapped between them with the gun. "Shit," he panted. "You're pretty good."

Juli spat blood at what she hoped was his face. "Fuck you."

He laughed. "Okay, I admit it: that first hit wasn't fair. But what can I say? Fair isn't really what we do here, is it? And besides, you asked for me _specifically_."

"What?" Juli's head was throbbing and it took her a moment to pull her wits together. "Agent Lim?"

"Naturally." He gave the gun a yank, angling the muzzle toward himself. "If you want to survive around here, you've got to be prepared to—"

Juli squeezed the trigger.

The man went taut, hands convulsing against hers, and she couldn't help a thrill of satisfaction at the smell of real fear that came off him then. But the gun didn't fire—it clicked and nothing came out. For a moment the pair of them stood suspended, pressed tight enough to breathe each other's air as they waited for the delayed report, but nothing happened. Finally, he laughed again, this time clearly rattled. "Christ, Kidman, all right already," he said, and he let go of her other hand so he could pry the Glock away from her for good. "You passed."

Juli braced herself against the cases, prepared to make another run for it at any moment, but then he backed away. "I what?"

"You _passed_. Isn't this what you wanted?"

As soon as she couldn't feel the heat of his body, Juli turned around. The case was still unlocked, and she reached inside, snatching up the first recognizable weapon she laid her hands on: a 9mm that didn't have much kick but was more than enough to get the job done. As she swung around the lights came back on, and she winced back, shielding her face with one hand. By the time she was able to blink the spots out of her eyes, her mystery attacker was several paces away, hands up in surrender.

"Whoa there—calm down. It's over." He pointed to his gun, sitting on the countertop several meters away. "No need to impress me."

Juli didn't lower her gun. As light as Lim's manner seemed, there was something _off_ about him that prevented her nerves from settling. He was a lot like she had imagined: he had a strong build beneath his white button down and slacks, a hard-lined but handsome face, wide hands in white gloves. But his skin was porcelain smooth, and his wide-set eyes were a brilliant, icy blue that came nowhere near matching the rest of his dark complexion. Something in the curl of his lip suggested _unhinged._ Juli figured that was to be expected from Mobius' "finest."

"What the hell is this?" she demanded. "You were just testing me?"

"Mobius hazing is the most unique in the world," said Lim, lowering his hands. "But Hanson wouldn't have given you to me if she didn't think you could handle yourself. She must really like you." He tilted his head thoughtfully. "Or else she wants you dead. She's a tough read."

"You're telling me." Juli glanced around the room and then out at the range, still convinced that armed security would burst in at any moment, fully aware of her treasonous intentions. As the seconds passed and only Lim continued to stare back at her, her adrenaline finally began to thin. They weren't on to her yet after all.

"Okay, come on," said Lim abruptly as he limped toward her. "Don't make me say you passed one more time—it wasn't _that_ exciting."

He offered her a handkerchief from his back pocket, other hand also outstretched, and Juli finally relented; she traded him the cloth for the gun. She stepped aside so he could replace the handgun in its case. "So," she said, mopping up the blood from her nose. "Guess that means I'm on the team. Am I supposed to be thanking you?"

"That would be appropriate." Lim locked the case once more and turned toward her. "But you can hold onto it for a while, if you want. I'm patient."

 _Is this guy for real?_ Juli glanced away and finally took notice of the glass partition separating the armory from the range; or at least, where it used to be. It had been ripped straight out of the wall. She wouldn't have thought a human had the strength to do that. "Thank you," she said. "For not breaking my nose."

He lifted an eyebrow. "Wish I could say the same for my foot."

Juli made a face. "Am I supposed to _apologize_? I thought you were trying to kill me."

"Well, then, here's your first lesson as my new team member." Lim grinned. _Unhinged_ , said the flash of his teeth. "If you have enough time to think that I'm trying to kill you, I'm not."

There couldn't be many men who could make a threat like that sound credible, and Juli wasn't sure even he pulled it off, but she felt the bruises darkening on her wrists, and she looked at the mangled opening where shatterproof glass had once been bolted into the wall. He wasn't _all_ talk. Still, the last thing she wanted was for him to see her sweat. He was still testing her.

"Are you always like this?" she asked bluntly.

Lim blinked, and she thought she might have judged poorly, but then leaned back. He was still grinning as he eyed her; the light reflected strangely off his irises. "Yes," he said. "Always. Are you?"

Juli handed his handkerchief back. "What do you mean?"

He stared at her a while longer, judging. She had no idea what to expect, even less so when his tongue poked out from between his teeth. He inhaled sharply as if pretending to have suddenly remembered something. "They took that detective friend of yours to the Admin today, didn't they?"

Juli did her best not to react, but she hadn't been expecting the change of subject. The thought of Joseph disappearing behind that closed door made her sweat all over again. "What does that have to do with anything?"

Again Lim took his time replying, and Juli instinctually started cycling through her options of escape if he decided to "fail" her after all. "It's frightening, isn't it," he said at last, watching her so closely that goose bumps rose up her arms. "They disappear behind that door, and when they come back out, you can't even tell the difference. But you know _something_ happened to them."

 _He's not testing you_ , Juli told herself, meeting his unflinching gaze. _He's fucking with you._ "Detective Oda isn't a friend," she said, though she had no idea how convincing she sounded. "He's an asset."

"That's not the point," said Lim. "He could be your worst enemy or a total stranger, and it would still frighten you just as much." He lowered his voice. "Because now you can't stop wondering, can you? What could they be doing to him in there? Whatever it is, they must have done it to you, too. Right?"

Juli clenched her fists at her sides. She had been trying _not_ to think about it, but there was no denying the cold tingling in her fingertips. "And you. Right?"

"What did you see?" he asked.

"Nothing." Juli shook her head. "Agent Hanson wouldn't let me in."

Lim tsked her. "Of course not, but what did you _see_?"

Juli wanted to squirm, sick of his unrelenting stare, of the taste of blood still thick in her mouth. She wanted to slap that smug look off his face, grab the Glock on the table and blast her way out of Mobius for good, Joseph at her heels. Or maybe Lim was right, and all she wanted was to get into that room to know for herself what her enemy was really capable of. "There were armed guards," she said. "Myra and Tatiana were dressed for surgery."

Lim waited to see if she would say more, and when she didn't, he nodded vaguely. "I'll tell you what," he said. "The truth is, I want you out in the field with me tonight. But both of us could use some...freshening up." He plucked at his blood-flecked shirt. "And I assume you'll want to spend some time checking yourself for surgery scars you don't remember getting." Juli couldn't help but shudder as he went on. "It'll take you a while to find, because you've been conditioned not to notice it. But once you find it, come back here, and you can check out the .45 for our field trip."

 _Fuck_. Juli swallowed hard and suddenly found it hard to breathe. _Fuck this place, fuck these people._ Lim took a step back and tilted his head expectantly. _Fuck this asshole._ But her skin was crawling, ready to burst open at every seam, and she knew she'd lost her chance. She couldn't get Joseph out without a gun, and she couldn't get a gun with Lim guarding the armory.

"Have it ready for me," she said, and she showed herself out.

It took almost all of Juli's remaining willpower not to sprint back to her room. As soon as she was inside, the door safely closed behind her, she stripped out of her clothing in front of the bathroom mirror. She had plenty of scars to account for. She'd cut her stomach crawling through a shattered window while breaking into a house once. She'd fought off a coke-head who came at her with a knife, slashing her forearm. "Shit," she hissed as she turned and twisted, scratching every patch of discolored skin. " _Shit_."

They'd put something in her. The layers of her flesh seemed to squirm against each other and she wanted to throw up. She'd defeated a shadow of the Administrator in her own mind, cast off their influence that had kept her docile and unquestioning for so long, but _there was something inside her_ , and every thought except finding it fled from her brain. She checked her torso, her thighs, her neck, but she could recall how she'd gotten every scar. She was growing panicked with the thought that her memories had been tampered with when a pain in her hand stopped her.

Her palm was bleeding. She cradled it in her other hand, stunned, until a swipe of her thumb dispelled the illusion, just like when she had left the STEM. There was no cut, but there was a scar carved into the natural lines of her hand. She had no idea how she had gotten it and couldn't remember even noticing it before.

Without thinking, Juli stormed into her kitchen. She grabbed up a steak knife and pressed her hand to the counter as her breath heaved through her lungs. _Get it out_. She lifted the knife, angling it toward her palm. _Get it out, get it out._ But then she started to shake. Several times she braced herself, willing her limbs to go through with it, until finally she threw the knife to the floor.

If anyone saw her with a bloody hand, they would know what she had done. Lim may or may not turn her in himself, but Myra or Tatiana would not be forgiving. She was still trapped.

Juli got dressed in fresh clothes. She stopped a few times to dig her thumb into her palm, feeling for some foreign object. Even just a clue as to what they'd put in her would hopefully ease her mind, but she found nothing. By the time she'd finished cleaning her face and was on her way back to the armory, she had calmed, somewhat. But her heart was still teetering in her chest, the horror of uncertainty ever at the back of her brain.

Lim was waiting for her just outside the door to the range. He had changed clothes as well, into a black suit coat, a gun holster barely visible beneath. He smiled at her, offering up a gun belt with a 1911 pistol strapped in it.

Juli buckled it around her waist. "What did they put in me?" she asked directly.

"Same thing they put in me," said Lim, taking off the glove on his left hand. He showed her the scar on his palm, which though long faded, was a match to hers. He then loosened his tie and undid the first few buttons on his shirt. "I've been here longer than most, but I still don't know what's in there. The rest of it, I mostly do."

He tugged his shirt down, showing off what looked like a coroner's Y incisions across his chest. Then he turned around, lifting his hair so Juli could see the scar that followed his hair line across the back of his scalp from ear to ear.

"Christ," Juli let slip without meaning to. "Why would you let them do that to you?"

"It was worth it." Lim turned back around and tidied himself up again. "Mobius helped me when no one else could. Kind of like you, if I read your file right."

 _You're nothing like me_ , Juli wanted to say, but she managed to hold herself back that time. "Yeah. I guess so."

Lim regarded her thoughtfully for a moment and then gestured for her to follow him. "I know what you're thinking, Kidman," he said as they headed down the hall. He showed no hint of a limp even though Juli was certain she really had broken some bones in his foot. "'These people are fucking crazy.' We've all thought it, sometime or another. But you'll get used to it. You'll fit in just fine."

"And if I don't?" Juli asked carefully.

"Then I'll shoot you in the head." He flashed her a cold smirk. "If it ever gets to that point, you'll be begging me to."

Juli believed him; it was actually something of a relief, thinking her death could be that simple after having seen glimpses of the alternative. "Thanks," she said, and she shook her head. "You know, I think you might be the most honest person I've met here."

Lim chuckled. "Yeah. Probably."

Juli gathered herself up. She had lost her chance, but there would be others. If she could at least convince Lim she was doing her best to fit in…she might learn more about what she was up against. Or if nothing else, what they'd done to him that might be used against her and Joseph in the future. _Joseph, hold on. I'm not giving up yet._

__

"So," she said, "where do I get to go for my first Agent Lim Approved field trip?"

"Beacon Mental Hospital," he replied, and Juli almost stopped walking. "This is our last chance to poke around before KCPD gets full control of the scene. It's been pretty much picked clean, but you've seen a side of it I haven't. Maybe you can help me find anything we missed."

Juli forced herself to breathe normally as she continued to match his pace. "The Beacon I was in was a dream world. Just a version of it from Ruvik's mind. I'm not sure half the stuff I saw was real let alone useful."

"Ah, but it's Ruvik we're trying to catch," Lim pointed out. "And you've been in his mind. You probably don't even realize yet how valuable your insight is." He chuckled some more. "I have high hopes for you."

Juli didn't know what to make of that, but she didn't protest further. He might have been right, after all. _I still have to kill Ruvik,_ she told herself as they headed for the facility's main exit. _It'll be easier to do that from within Mobius than on my own. He has to come first. Then I can worry about getting the hell out of here._


	5. Chapter 5

Beacon Mental Hospital. Sebastian wished he had burned it to the ground.

It certainly made for a satisfying image; sunset orange glowing hot over the hospital's skyline already gave it an appearance of seething embers, and the rattle of wind through the trees could have just as easily been a roar of healthy flames. Sebastian sucked on his cigarette and imagined the tower crumbling into flaking ash. The thought that he might one day walk the streets of his hometown without feeling the eye of that damned lighthouse filled him with an almost manic eagerness.

"Home sweet home, huh?" he said as he and Ruvik made their way up to the hospital's western wall. Ruvik didn't reply.

They would have looked like an odd pair, Sebastian thought as they approached the ten foot tall stone barricade. Some of their stolen money had gone toward buying Ruvik a pair of cheap jeans that actually fit him, but he was practically swimming in Martin's oversized hoodie, his rifle slung over his shoulder. Sebastian, meanwhile, had chosen track pants and a silk dress shirt—only because it was black—with his gun holster over top, the shotgun hooked to his back and pry-bar shoved down his pants. Joseph would have laughed himself sick.

Thankfully, the road they had left the truck at was surrounded on both sides by trees, the nearest buildings far enough away that no one was going to spot them without some effort. The wall itself was overgrown with thorn bushes, and an old door nestled into the side didn't look like it had been opened in years. It reminded Sebastian of a cheap movie set.

"I guess we should have brought a ladder," Sebastian muttered, leaning on his crutch as he eyed the wall.

"I hid a key in the bricks on the other side," said Ruvik. "Help me over the wall."

"I was afraid you'd say that." Sebastian put out his cigarette and picked out an area by the wall with the thinnest bushes where he could get into position. _At least he doesn't weigh that much_ , he told himself, but he still grimaced when Ruvik stepped onto his laced hands, the crutch digging into his armpit. Fortunately, Ruvik was fairly spry in his new body, and once on Sebastian's shoulders he had no trouble pulling himself over the top of the wall.

"Careful," Sebastian called up to him, his concern reactionary more than anything.

Ruvik dropped to the other side, and after a minute, Sebastian could hear the door's heavy iron lock being opened. The door itself was less willing, and it took both of them to get it open wide enough for Sebastian to hobble through. Deciding it would be safer in case they had to make a hasty get-away, they left it half open and headed into the compound.

"You asked if Jimenez ever let me out," Ruvik said, tucking the key into the pocket of his jeans. "He didn't have to."

Sebastian snorted. "I find it kind of hard to imagine you hitting the town."

"I never went far when I was alone." Ruvik lifted his chin as he guided them toward the hospital's main building to the south. "There were just times I wanted to be outside the walls."

"I guess don't blame you." Sebastian glanced back and forth, taking in the old buildings that made up the grounds, their tall and slanted spires, the rustling shrubs and twisted trees. "For some stupid reason I thought this place would be less creepy as the real thing."

"Home sweet home," Ruvik muttered, and Sebastian honestly couldn't tell if he was bitter, nostalgic, or maybe both.

It was quiet, except for the wind. The noise from the city was well blocked out by the walls and trees, and Sebastian's skin prickled with goose bumps with the thought that they were cut off from the outside world. He hadn't expected to find much in the way of FBI, but at least their presence would have made the scenery more normal, more human. At least then maybe he could stop waiting for zombies to crawl out from around every corner.

"So," said Sebastian, trying to not let the looming shadow of the lighthouse intimidate him, "isn't it about time you told me what we're really up against?"

"What do you mean?" asked Ruvik, staring straight ahead.

"Mobius. You still haven't told me all that much about them. I may be a detective, but I can't find them for us without something to go on."

Ruvik stopped suddenly next to an old oak tree, and he waved for Sebastian to stay close and quiet. Sebastian obeyed, and after a few moments, Ruvik continued on again. "Someone is inside the building," he said quietly. "But they're heading up, not where we're going."

Sebastian looked for himself, but he couldn't see or sense anything. He followed close behind Ruvik. "Seriously, though," he persisted, though in a lower tone. "I need to know everything you do if we're going to hit them together."

"Most of what I know about them comes second hand," said Ruvik, keeping an eye on the lighthouse until they were up against the building and well-sheltered by the eaves. "From Jimenez, from my father. I'm not sure how reliable some of it is."

"Your father?" Sebastian leaned against the wall, catching his breath a moment while Ruvik peeked in through the windows. "Your old man was Mobius?" The connection clicked in his brain an instant later. "That old church that collapsed over in Cedar Hill," he said. "That was the church he belonged to, wasn't it? Where they found all those bodies? That was a front for Mobius."

"It's the other way around actually," Ruvik corrected him. He tapped on the frame of one window in several places. "Mobius began with the church, and yes, my father was a prominent member. Not that I paid it much mind, at the time. Pry bar."

"Huh? Oh." Sebastian handed the pry bar over and watched as Ruvik shoved the curved end into a small gap in the window frame. "So, you mean Mobius is actually some kind of religious organization?"

"In a sense." Ruvik wedged the pry bar in as far as he could and then pulled; the metal bars covering the window creaked angrily as the entire frame pulled away from the wall. When Sebastian added his strength they were able to open it wide enough that Ruvik could reach his arm inside, flicking open a pair of latches that allowed it to spring wide. Between the guns, the crutch, and Sebastian's leg, climbing into the building wasn't easy, but soon enough they were in and closing the window behind them.

The inside of the hospital was as dark and foreboding as Sebastian remembered, only moonlight through the dirty windows guiding their way. His hair stood on end as he limped alongside Ruvik down a familiar corridor. There were still bloodstains on some areas of the floor. "You would be better off referring to them as a cult," Ruvik continued his explanation as they went, shoving the pry bar through his belt loop. "Rather than worshipping any Christian concept of God, they are devoted to the ideal of Godhood itself. The Bible states that God created man in His own image, after all. Members of the Church take this as the literal truth, and believe that within every human being lies the potential for divine power—that omnipotence is an evolutionary inevitability. The work they do is simply speeding the process along."

Sebastian grimaced as he thought of the creatures in Ruvik's nightmare world. "So, basically, they're insane."

"If spending several hundred years killing and maiming people in an attempt to prove a theory that has no scientific basis is the definition of insanity, then yes."

"Yeah, that," Sebastian said with confidence. "That's a pretty good definition of 'insane' right there."

Ruvik shook his head. "There are some among them I would consider…willfully misguided to the point of absurdity," he said, and Sebastian was tempted to make some manner of _takes one to know one_ crack. "But from what I know of them, Mobius is made up of maybe a dozen very wealthy and very deluded fanatics. The rest are sheep drawn into the fold through promises of immortality and perfection—weak souls being preyed upon by greedy imbeciles. Not unlike most religious establishments, really."

Sebastian's first instinct was to contradict, only to remind himself that his own Catholic upbringing hadn't left him with a glowing impression of God's good word, either. "All right, so, they want to be all-powerful super-beings," he pressed on. "So why STEM? I doubt that playing God in a dream world is enough to satisfy maniacs like them."

"Correct," said Ruvik, "if 'playing' God were all it were."

Sebastian definitely didn't like the way he said that. As they stopped at the stairwell door, he took a moment to study Ruvik's face. "What the hell is that supposed to mean?"

Ruvik opened the door a crack to peek through, but when he started to carry on, Sebastian took him by the shoulder. "Tell me what you mean," he insisted.

Ruvik faced him, and his eyes took on that almost boyish look Sebastian had seen in him before. "Was your time in STEM really so amusing that you considered it play?" he taunted.

"Don't—" Sebastian caught himself, remembering that they might not be entirely alone in the building. He lowered his voice to nearly a hiss. "Don't fuck with me Ruvik," he said. "I'm trying to learn more about our enemy so we can get through this alive. Your head games won't help anything."

"I'm asking in earnest," Ruvik replied calmly. "Do you really consider what I put you through to have been merely play?"

 _Don't give him an excuse to prove himself,_ Sebastian's better sense warned him. _Handshake or no, you can't trust him to keep a promise._ "I know very well what you're capable of," he said carefully. "But that doesn't make you God."

Ruvik eased Sebastian's hand off his shoulder. "Maybe not," he said, pulling a flashlight out of the front pocket of his hoodie. A smirk tugged his lips as he turned it on and pushed the door all the way open. "But you must admit, it does make me _very_ special."

"Special." Sebastian tried not to show any pain as he followed Ruvik down the stairs, cautious over every step. "Sure. Very special."

"What I was able to accomplish using STEM has never been done before, not by human hands," Ruvik carried on as he led the way. "I created an entire _world_ , Sebastian. It was unrestrained, uncompromising. It may not have been what I originally intended, and it certainly wasn't what Mobius expected of me. But it was mine, born of my own mind, and it was _real_."

"It was a nightmare," Sebastian retorted. "A sick fantasy, illusions. Nothing more."

Ruvik trailed his fingertips along the wall as he rounded the landing. "I carved a new reality into your eyes," he said, sounding too pleased within himself for Sebastian's liking. "Into your ears, your flesh. Don't tell me you can't still feel it."

Sebastian felt it all right; Beacon had rested just below the layers of his skin ever since he first entered. Being within its walls again was twisting his nerve endings into knots. He licked his lips as he debated over how honest he could risk being. "I'm not saying it wasn't...effective. But you admitted yourself that it was all in our heads. It was a dream—it didn't actually happen. It wasn't real."

"You only say that because you don't know what 'real' actually means," said Ruvik. "The definition is much broader than you're imagining."

"You don't get to invent meanings for words," Sebastian muttered as they reached the lower floor. "I know what it means just fine."

Ruvik held the door open for Sebastian; he still looked unbearably smug. "Do you remember the conversation we had in the forest?" he asked. "About the way your senses process reality around you?"

They entered into a hallway, and immediately Sebastian had to pause. Something about the lines of heavy doors jiggled a switch in his mind he couldn't quite throw. It reminded him of being in the Victoriano Estate, and he found himself wondering if there was a meat grinder hidden behind the double doors lying at the end of their path. He didn't want to keep going and he couldn't make his feet carry him, so he leaned against the wall, faking like his injured leg needed the rest.

"I remember," he said, not that he wanted to keep going in their conversation, either. "I think I already know what you're going to say."

"You should," Ruvik said, nodding. He leaned his back against the opposite wall, very content to pause in their progress. "It's a very old school of philosophy, after all: the tragic separation of man from his reality." He stared down the hall, eyes focused as if already looking into the room beyond. It made Sebastian ill with an inexplicable dread. "Man is not capable of interacting with his own reality directly. We only perceive it through our senses—imperfect organs transmitting signals that require an equally imperfect brain to translate. Senses are the window to the world, both channel and barrier. So who can really say what is real and what isn't? Even when we build machines to perceive what we cannot, that's only one more layer of separation. Knowing this, can you say with confidence that you've ever experienced something 'real'?"

"Yeah, and if a tree falls in the forest and no one hears it, does it make a sound?" Sebastian scowled. "It's bullshit. You convincing all the people in this hospital that they're in Hell doesn't make it real." His stomach twisted, and the words spilled out before he could stop them. "Not any more than you can change the past by trying to convince yourself it didn't happen. The world is what it is. There's no changing that, and you know that every bit as well as I do."

Ruvik's gaze flickered back to him, and his eyes were briefly full of ghosts. He looked away again. "The question isn't whether or not the tree makes a sound," he said. "The question is, does it matter one way or the other?"

He pushed away from the wall and continued toward the far doors. Sebastian had little choice but to gather his wits and follow. "In science, we determine truth through repetition," Ruvik said as he walked. "If you can prove your hypothesis through experimentation enough times, with a wide enough sample size, you can reasonably determine that you have gained useful knowledge of the world. But what about aspects of our reality that cannot be so easily quantified? What about abstract concepts like color and music? What about morality, history, hope? So much of what we take for granted every day depends on subjective perceptions of the majority. So what _is_ the nature of truth? These are the questions that STEM strives to answer, and can. STEM is a machine that can reform the nature of reality itself."

"Do you even listen to yourself when you talk?" Sebastian muttered as he fought to keep up.

"If you'd take this seriously instead of being stubborn for its own sake, you'd understand what I'm trying to tell you," Ruvik retorted. He reached the far door and stopped again so he could face Sebastian, his face alight with urgency. "Here's an example you'll be familiar with: Two men witness the same crime, but even if they're honest, they'll both end up giving you a different story. Why?"

"Because people are biased," Sebastian answered. "Memory isn't absolute. Or they saw it from different angles, at different times, in different lighting or whatever. There are lots of reasons." He leaned closer. "But nothing they say changes what _actually_ happened."

"What if it did?" said Ruvik, rising up slightly on his toes even if he had no hope of matching Sebastian's height. "What if perception were universal? What if all people, everywhere, saw everything from the same perspective—what if they had no choice but to agree on every detail of the world around them? What if one man's intellect at the center of humanity guided every choice, every preference and experience? If all human souls on the planet agreed on an event happening a certain way, would it even matter if it was a lie? Would reality itself be able to withstand it?"

Sebastian's heart pounded at the thought. His head ached and he remembered how ridiculous and yet how _real_ everything had felt within STEM. Every time the impossible had screamed at him, reminding him in the most dramatic and obvious of ways that he was only in a nightmare, somehow it had been so difficult to accept. He suddenly found it very easy to imagine the world Ruvik was describing for him, and it left him ill.

"You're talking about global mind control," he said uneasily. "That's what Mobius is after."

"The STEM is wireless, now. With a large enough core and enough transmitters, it would be possible."

Sebastian shook his head. He tried to shake the words right back out of his ears. "But what good does it even do them to be kings of a bunch of coma patients in bathtubs?"

"It's not about vegetables in tubs, don't you…." Ruvik sighed with frustration. "I'll just have to show you," he said, and he pushed the doors open.

Sebastian wasn't able to follow at first. His brain was already spinning like a top and nothing on the other side of those doors was going to make his life any easier. It was the doors swinging shut, cutting off the light from Ruvik's flashlight, which drove Sebastian after him. The room was a laboratory. He could only see scant details in the meager lighting, but there was no mistaking the carts and shelves meant to house instruments, the drains in the tiled floor, and at the lab's center, an empty tub the size of a queen mattress. There were also the remnants of some kind of cylindrical apparatus, left behind by the FBI likely because it was already mostly destroyed, its panels torn open with wires exposed. The divots in the metal looked eerily like knuckle imprints.

"You recognize this room, don't you?" Ruvik asked, shining his light into the different corners, then lingering on the tub at the center. There was no water, but the light flicking off its surface reminded Sebastian of a time when there had been.

Sebastian stared into the tub, and finally the switch was thrown; he could almost see Leslie lying in the filthy water, metal clamps on his temples as Jimenez moved between the different controls and displays. "It's like that lab in the dream," he murmured, remembering where he had stood. Behind him, where he had been thrown like vapor through a chain-link fence, there now stood only a solid wall. "It's not exactly the same, but this was in STEM. It's where Jimenez tried to wake up Leslie."

"Even that old fool started to catch on, toward the end," Ruvik said as he moved around the tub, his fingers slithering against the cold metal. "This was the first STEM terminal I built after coming to Beacon. It was brilliant for its time, primitive now by comparison. I'm sure he thought that between the main core in the lighthouse and the two secondary terminals in the wings, I would overlook this one. Which is why he brought Leslie here."

 _Leslie._ Sebastian frowned; he didn't like hearing Ruvik say the name. "Looks pretty busted up," he said, rapping on the central unit with his knuckles. "No wonder the feds left it. What happened?"

Ruvik snorted with amusement. "You know what happened."

"Why would I? I've never actually been here."

"Haven't you?" Ruvik stopped at the foot of the tub and shone his light directly into Sebastian's face. "Look again, Seb."

Sebastian winced back. "Cut that out." He covered his eyes, and when Ruvik lowered the flashlight, it took him a moment to blink the spots away. As he did, he saw flashes of the dream; the lab gleamed in patches of memory around him, drawing into focus the smell of the steam, and the hiss of the fleshy beast that had crushed Jimenez into bits and blood. He shivered beneath a rise of goose bumps.

"What are you saying?" he asked outright, one hand on the tub as he circled toward Ruvik. "That I was here, in this room, while I was dreaming about being in this room? How does that make any sense?"

"The original STEM connection was very tenuous," Ruvik explained, and when Sebastian got too close, he moved away, towards the head of the tub again. "The subject needed to be in a state of sensory deprivation, hence the bathtubs. But once Jimenez completed my wireless STEM, once those traitors placed me in its heart, I became strong enough to force connections without those extra precautions. It helps _maintain_ the connection, certainly. But with a stronger, larger core, the need for sedation and deprivation becomes non-existent. You could come in and out of this hospital, place your fingerprints in every hall and room, never knowing you were connected at all."

Sebastian stopped bothering to chase Ruvik around the tub as he let the words finally sink it. "We weren't just dreaming," he said. "We were sleepwalking."

"You woke up in the lighthouse, didn't you?" Ruvik said, sounding pleased with Sebastian finally catching on. "Did you never wonder how you got there? Don't you remember finding my terminals, tearing the wired subjects free from me one by one?" Sebastian flexed his fingers, and they remembered the feeling of the oily tubes jammed into human scalps. "In its perfected state, the STEM is not a kingdom of Lotus Eaters, it is a filter to cover the world, like colored cellophane over a lightbulb. _That_ is what Mobius desperately wants: a living nightmare that they control, and seven billion people carrying out their daily lives so well adjusted to it that they don't even know it's there. They can shape the world entirely to their choosing, and reality itself will have no choice but to follow suit."

 _It would be possible,_ Sebastian thought, looking again to the inside of the tub. He could hear Leslie screaming through his ears. _With a large enough machine, a few more years development...._ He glared at Ruvik through the dark. "And you built it for them."

"Not for them," Ruvik said sharply. "Like I said, this isn't what I originally intended it for." He reached the main portion of the terminal and stroked the many blemishes covering it. "But look at what it's made me capable of. It's difficult to argue with this level of success."

"You really expect me to believe that a monster in your nightmare reached into the real world and smashed this terminal?" Sebastian asked.

"Sebastian." He tilted the flashlight up, lighting his face from below. "You do remember that you're speaking to a ghost, yes?"

Sebastian made a face, but he had to admit that Ruvik had a point. He rubbed his eyes and stepped back from the tub. "Let's just...get what we came for," he muttered. "I want to get out of here."

"Likewise." Ruvik strode to the wall and pushed a few of the rolling carts aside. He began feeling along the floor tiles, but when Sebastian came closer, he waved him back. "You might want to stay over there for now," he said. "I need to disarm it."

"Right. Deathtraps." Sebastian couldn't make out much of what Ruvik was doing, but he heard tiles scraping, and a squeal of metal followed by sharp clicks. "They really don't get any crazier than you, Ruvik."

"Takes one to know one," Ruvik said, deadpan, as he worked.

Sebastian harrumphed. "Did you really just say that?"

Something gave way with a screeching noise, and Sebastian jumped, bracing himself between his crutch and the tub. "Got it," said Ruvik. He set his rifle and pry bar against the wall nearby. "Down we go."

Sebastian edged closer, and when he saw the two foot wide hole in the floor, he got a chill. Even when Ruvik shined his light inside, there was only black. "Down _there_?"

"Or you could stay here." Ruvik twisted onto his hands and knees and began to lower himself backwards through the opening. "But the flashlight comes with me."

The thought of being left in the pitch dark lab made Sebastian's skin crawl; he could have sworn Ruvik's mad amalgam was breathing against the back of his neck. "No, I'm coming." He braced his crutch to the wall, along with his shotgun, and began the careful process of lowering himself to the floor. "I want to keep my eye on you."

Ruvik disappeared down the hole, flashlight in hand. Immediately the room above was plunged into total darkness, and Sebastian's breath came faster as he felt out the opening and shoved his legs inside. _Calm down, there's nothing here_ , he told himself, arms straining to hold his weight as he dropped himself gradually into the unknown. The edge of the tile scraped against his chest and he smelled gunpowder. _What the hell kind of trap was protecting this?_ He flinched when Ruvik took his pant leg, but it was only to keep his left knee bent so that he wouldn't put any weight on it when he landed. At least he was an ever-attentive doctor.

Ruvik's "secret lab" was everything Sebastian had imagined it would be: cramped, dark, and stuffed full of all manner of bizarre instruments and pieces of electronic equipment. The walls and floor were made from cement bricks, as were most of the work spaces. An air mattress with a lumpy pillow was stuffed into one corner and canned foods gathered around it. As Ruvik went around flicking switches, a bare bulb hanging from the ceiling illuminated, a trio of computers turned on, and a ventilation fan started turning. The extra light made visible a host of charcoal drawings on every wall: medical diagrams, lines of text, hand-drawn flowers. Sebastian took it all, his stomach up in his throat.

 _For seven years, I lived in the walls,_ Sebastian recalled Ruvik saying. He watched Ruvik hunch down in front of the computers and didn't know what to make of the sudden, strangling emotion that came over him. He limped to a nearby pile of blocks that was tall and broad enough to support him and sat down.

"So," he said, carefully stretching out his injured leg. "You put this all together yourself?"

"Yes, piece by piece." Once the computers booted up, Ruvik opened a small pencil case hidden in one of the cement blocks and plugged in a USB stick. "The electricity runs on a separate circuit from most of the hospital, and the ventilation shaft opens into the courtyard garden. I needed somewhere I could be away from Jimenez's prying eyes, but not so often that it made him suspicious."

Once the computer was busy transferring files, Ruvik moved about the room. He stripped the case from the pillow and began filling it with pieces of equipment. Sebastian watched, telling himself several times not to attempt any more questions, but seeing Ruvik's eagerness in collecting his belongings convinced him there was still one left that needed answering.

"What were you originally going to use STEM for?" he asked, watching what he could of Ruvik's face in the glow from the monitors.

"Does it matter now?" Ruvik squatted down next to the canned goods, looking them over with the flashlight.

"Yes, it matters to me." Sebastian leaned forward. _Because you're here, helping him rebuild it. What if you use it to destroy Mobius, and you can't kill him? What will he use it for then?_ "As fucked up as you are, I can't imagine you going in for the world domination routine like Mobius. So what was it?"

Ruvik didn't answer right away. Sebastian rolled his eyes, expecting some manner of dumbed-down metaphor for his benefit, but then he realized just how quiet Ruvik had become. All the smug condescension had left his eyes by the time they were returning Sebastian's expectant look. "You won't believe me," he said. It was the most absurd notion to come out of him so far, and Sebastian laughed.

He couldn't help it. Ruvik just looked so damned sincere he started to laugh until his ribs ached. It had been a long time, and for those few, bizarre moments, he was grateful to Ruvik for reminding him what it even felt like. He laughed himself almost out of his seat.

Ruvik glared at him the entire time, unmoving anger hard in his face. "Ruvik," Sebastian said when he could, wiping his eyes. "God damn it, Ruvik, I haven't believed a word out of your mouth since I met you. You're really gonna clam up on me _now_?"

"If you're not going to take this seriously, then neither am I," he retorted, returning to the computers.

"Jesus Christ." Sebastian shook his head, finally managing to wrangle himself under control again. "Come on, just answer the question. I want to know." When Ruvik ignored him by moving the USB from one computer to the next, he tried again. "Look, I'm sorry I laughed, it's just...." He had to smother another incredulous chuckle against the back of his wrist. "Seriously, all the impossible shit you've be spewing at me the last forty-eight hours? How can this be worse?" When that didn't help matters, either, he sighed. "You might as well just tell me. I'm the only chance you'll have to tell _anyone_."

That did the trick. Ruvik shifted on his knees, glancing at Sebastian over his shoulder. "You really want to know?"

"Yes." Sebastian had to channel his greatest husband-like patience to banish all lingering humor and sarcasm from his face. "Yes, Ruvik, I want to know. Please."

The please might have been pushing it, judging by Ruvik's wary expression, but he did take a deep breath and begin. "You have to understand, I've been working on this machine my entire life," he said firmly. "I first conceived of it when I was just a boy, before the...incident. My motivations and the device itself grew hand in hand over a course of almost twenty-five years. There's no one reason why it exists."

"Then just tell me how it started," Sebastian offered, "so I can carve it on Mobius' headstones."

Ruvik considered some more, and then, after starting another file transfer, turned to give Sebastian his full attention. "It's like I said before: I wanted to connect two human minds as completely and seamlessly as possible."

"So you could get yourself a new body?"

"No—this was before that." Ruvik shifted his weight, and Sebastian's remaining amusement slipped away; some stories were difficult even for Ruvik to tell, apparently. "When I was a child, I had nothing but questions," he said, testing the weight of each word as he spoke. "I wanted to know as much as I could, about everything, and nothing fascinated me more than living things. Other human beings especially were an utter mystery to me. I wanted to understand them better, and I dreamed often of different means that would help me accomplish this."

That sick feeling crept again into Sebastian's gut. "I guess going out and meeting people wasn't really an option for you, huh?"

"Even if it were, it wouldn't have been enough," said Ruvik. "I'm talking about an understanding that goes beyond that." His enthusiasm must have been replenishing, because he crawled closer. "It's like what we were just talking about. We cannot even hope to comprehend the world around us—what hope do we have of ever connecting with each other? You don't _know_ other people, all you have are ghosts of them that live only in your mind: your perception of how they look, how they sound, how they act. But their truth, the very nature of who and what they are, exists only inside of _them_."

Sebastian leaned back. His mind was suddenly aflame with memories of Myra, the tones of her voice and the contour of her skin, and he tried to wipe them away. "And you thought that connecting brain to brain could get you past all that?"

" _Yes_." Ruvik's eyes wandered toward the room's shadows, and Sebastian wondered which ghosts were haunting him then. "It was the only way that would be close enough," he said, his voice hushed with importance. "I wanted to understand another person at the deepest, most intimate level, so that I knew what they were thinking, at any moment. I wanted to experience the world through their senses, feel what they felt. To know what it was like to be someone else." He drew deeper into his shoulders. "I had to know if she considered me as irreplaceable as I did her."

The air suddenly felt much denser. Sebastian hardly knew what to think or how to react. "If I didn't know better," he murmured, "I'd say you were talking about being in love."

Ruvik gaze flicked back to him with their usual intensity. "And you always know better than me, do you?"

"In this case, yeah." He gestured with his left hand. "Because I've actually _been_ in love, more than once. Loving someone is not the same as knowing them."

"Shouldn't it be?" Ruvik glared back at him defiantly. "The desire to know another person beyond the limits of what our current reality allows for is the only definition of that word I find useful at all."

"Is that so?" Sebastian crossed his arms. "So why'd she end up a six-limbed hell-beast stuck in your nightmare world?"

Ruvik tensed up, and the walls of the lab almost seemed to flex with him, but Sebastian kept talking before he could reply. "Because that's who you're talking about it, isn't it?" he said. "Your sister, Laura? Hell of a way to honor her memory."

"You don't understand anything," Ruvik said coldly.

"You wanna talk about knowing someone, I've been _in your mind_ ," Sebastian pressed on. "You've never used this fucking machine to 'get to know' anyone—all you've ever done is push _your_ mind onto them, _your_ pain. You think your history is so damn ugly you want all of us to suffer as much as you did, too. You don't give a shit about other people except when it comes to punishing them, and it's your own selfish bitterness that made your memory of her into a monster."

Ruvik continued to glower at him, fists clenched against his knees, but Sebastian found his anger merely vindicating. "Well?" he prodded. "Not so funny when I do it to you, is it?"

"If you talk about my sister that way again," said Ruvik, "I'll kill you."

Sebastian grunted. "I thought we were past death threats."

Ruvik crawled back to his file transfers. "That was your promise to make, not mine."

Arguing their conditions wasn't about to lead anywhere, so Sebastian let it drop. But as Ruvik continued working in silence, the bitter atmosphere began to get to him again. For a few minutes Ruvik had appeared honest, and Sebastian began to think it would have been worth it keep his mouth shut and learn some more. But it was probably too late; he suspected Ruvik would be much less willing to share if he tried again anytime soon.

 _Don't you dare feel guilty_ , he told himself. _He killed everyone in this hospital—almost two hundred people died thanks to STEM. Don't forget what he really is._

At last Ruvik finished, shutting down the computers. The last of them was a laptop that also went into the pillow case. "That's it for down here," he said, his voice still stiff and irritable. He moved around the lab, shutting off the fans and lights. "I'll see if there's anything that can be saved from the terminal itself, but I doubt it. We should leave."

"Yeah, I hear that." Sebastian used the wall to drag himself upright. When it was time to climb out, though, he hesitated. There were grooves in the wall meant to be used for climbing that wouldn't do him any good. "Maybe you should...."

"I'll go first." Ruvik handed him the pillowcase and climbed up without waiting for a response. Once again Sebastian was thrust into darkness; he squeezed his eyes shut for a moment, hoping it would be less disorienting. Passing the pillowcase up was no issue, and then it was Sebastian's turn. He took a deep breath, and with Ruvik pulling and a short hop to the first foothold, he was able to squirm from one mad scientist's layer to the next.

And then Ruvik stopped. He turned his head sharply toward the door like a bird catching on to a cat. Sebastian retrieved his shotgun, but otherwise tried to remain as still as possible; if Ruvik sensed a threat, he knew well enough to take it seriously.

"They're coming back down," Ruvik said, hushed. "There's only two." His eyes narrowed. "They're Mobius."

Sebastian's hands flexed around the gun. "You're sure?"

"Yes. At least one of them feels familiar." Ruvik tied off the top of the pillowcase as best he could and offered it to Sebastian again. "Take this."

"I can't carry it, walk, and shoot at the same time," he warned.

"You won't have to." Ruvik shoved the pry bar into his hoodie pocket, letting it poke out on either side. The rifle he kept handy. "You're going to stay here. I'm going to check them out and come back."

"No," Sebastian said immediately. "If there's two, we should take them together."

"We might not have to—they could just pass us by, and if they don't, I can incapacitate them." He headed for the doors, and Sebastian had to holster his gun so he could struggle to his feet. "If they see either of us, it might as well be me. We have an advantage as long as they still think you're dead."

"If we kill them," said Sebastian, hobbling after, "it won't matter if they see us."

"If we kill them, Mobius will know I was here." Ruvik peeked through the door and then turned back to Sebastian. "Just wait here, and if anyone tries to get in without knocking first, shoot them. It's very simple."

Ruvik pushed through the doors, and Sebastian wasn't close or fast enough to prevent him. "Ruvik, wait!" Sebastian called after him, but then the doors swung shut, blotting out all but a blurred gleam of the flashlight through the round, porthole-like windows. Muttering curses, he set the pillowcase down and put his back to the wall beside the doorway. Very soon, every trace of light was gone, leaving him shivering in the black.

 _This is a shit idea,_ Sebastian thought, wedging the crutch hard into his armpit so he could keep both hands free for the shotgun. The sound of his breath was distractingly loud in the empty room. _Probably him getting back at you for laughing at him, the little prick._ But there wasn't anything else he could do, so he stayed still, trying not to think about Frankenstein beasts waiting for him in the shadows.

***

The inside of Beacon Mental Hospital was a little too close to Juli's memory of it. Navigating the hallways with only flashlights as illumination, wind howling through the eaves, dried blood in every corner—a few shambling corpses and she would have been right at home. The upper lab hidden in the lighthouse tower itself at least had the benefit of sunset streaming through the windows, but even that was fading fast. All the machinery was gone, leaving only empty tubs like headstones.

"I'm sorry," Juli said, leaning into the back of the elevator as she and Lim descended after their brief investigation. "This is all very familiar to me, but I don't think it's going to help us. I'm sure the lab's already been combed for secret exits. However Ruvik slipped away, I don't think he did it up here."

"A secret exit isn't what we're looking for," said Lim. He didn't seem affected at all by the hospital's ominous atmosphere, and Juli wished she had some way of sharing a little taste of that hell with him. "Gutierrez worked in this building—there isn't any route he could have taken that she wouldn't know about, and you don't just slip away from under the eyes of three armed Mobius agents." He smirked to himself. "I'm willing to bet he used a much more interesting trick than that."

Juli eyed him cautiously. She still wasn't sure how much she could risk trusting him with. "Then you believe me?" she asked. "About what he's capable of?"

"I've seen the things they wheeled out of that lab of his, here and at HQ." He swept his tongue over his teeth. "I believe he's capable of just about anything."

"I'm not sure I even want to know what that means," Juli replied. The elevator slowed to a halt, and she snapped her attention to the doors as they opened; she half expected a shadowy figure to be lying in wait on the other side. But there was only the hallway they'd crossed, foreboding but otherwise unremarkable. "Where to next?"

"We'll check the other terminal labs," said Lim as he exited the elevator. "They're where he spent the most time. He had a room in the east wing, but Gutierrez said he hardly used it."

Juli took a step after him, but before she could get further, a hand closed around hers. The skin was hot and leathery, and she could feel the close proximity of another body where there should have only been wall. She knew immediately who it was; her heart skittered up into her ears as she dropped her flashlight and reached instead for her gun. By then Ruvik was already yanking her toward the elevator panel, and he forced her outstretched fingers against the door close button.

Lim turned, but his expression registered only mild confusion. "Kidman?"

"It's him!" she shouted, trying to pull her hand back as the doors closed, but Ruvik was already shoving her hand onto the button for the basement level. "It's Ruvik! He's here!" She wrestled her gun free, only to realize there was nothing to aim at. Even though she could still feel his scarred hand around hers, his goddamn breath against her cheek, she saw nothing beside her, and there wasn't enough room between her and the wall that there _could_ have been.

The doors closed her in. Once the elevator was descending the ghostly hand let go, and Juli threw herself back against the far wall. She leveled her pistol at the space she had just occupied but there was still nothing.

"I know it's you," she said, thumbing the hammer back. "Show yourself!"

She received no answer. As the elevator whirred softly with its descent, she began to doubt it had actually been Ruvik at all; she could no longer feel even a lingering impression of his hand against hers. But her mind was buzzing with anxious energy, and her every instinct demanded she not let her guard down. When the elevator slowed, she snatched up her flashlight and then braced herself again for attack.

The doors opened. Only an abandoned hallway lay beyond, locked doors like sentinels lining the walls. Juli waited several beats and then took a cautious step forward. She reminded herself of all the horrors she had already suffered within these walls, the creatures and traps she had overcome. Ruvik was only one man with no machine—she could finish what her partner had started. _I'm not afraid_ , she told herself as she stepped off the elevator. _It's just tricks and illusions, and I have a gun that shoots big fucking bullets. I can take anything he throws at me_.

Juli changed her grip on the flashlight, turning it outward to support her gun hand. As she stepped into the hall she scanned each door and corner, daring Ruvik to appear. It wasn't until her flashlight passed over the circular windows in the far-end door that she caught a glimpse of movement. She waited a moment, expecting some monstrosity to burst through, but there was nothing. She continued forward. _If it is Ruvik, and Lim finds me with him, he's going to want to bring him in alive,_ she thought. She didn't bother to try to hide the clack of her heels. _I can't let that happen. I need to find a shot and take it—I can tell him later I had no choice. All that matters is killing Ruvik._

She reached the door, and there paused one more time to rally herself. A glance over her shoulder showed no ghouls sneaking up on her from behind, and the elevator was still there, its doors open. Lim wasn't even trying to follow. _Maybe Ruvik is preventing him. So much for Mobius' finest._ Juli took in a deep breath. _Kill the bastard._

Juli kicked the right door open. It swung wide, smacking loudly against the inside wall and granting her only a glimpse of the lab inside. There was no sign of Ruvik, but there was a blast from a shotgun. If she had taken one step into the room she would have gotten herself a skull full of buckshot. Startled but far from shaken, she ducked behind the second door, making sure to keep her head clear of the window, which was wise; another shot from her attacker shattered it a moment later.

A shotgun didn't seem like Ruvik's style, but as long as a shadowy version of herself wasn't behind the trigger she wouldn't complain. With her back again to the wall she aimed at the right door as it slowly swinging shut once more. The tips of fingers poked around it; he was using the door as a shield just as she was. _I'm not scared of you anymore_ , Juli thought, and she shot the other window out.

The fingers pulled back, and Juli could hear his shoes scuffling against the tile floor as he retreated more deeply into safety. Rather than wait for him to solidify his position, she charged into the lab and threw all her weight into the door. She heard a man's startled grunt, felt the door give way as he lost his footing. Her heels didn't have much for traction, but with her enemy unsteady she was able to pin him up against the wall with the door between them. She heard the gun clatter to the floor.

 _I've got him._ Juli angled the muzzle of her pistol through the shattered window. _I've got him!_

The shotgun went off again, buckshot careening through the open window close enough that Juli's hair stirred. She didn't have time to wonder what she'd heard hitting the floor; she couldn't help but reel back, ears ringing, and it gave him time to throw her off her feet.

Juli landed on her side. He elbow stung and the flashlight rattled out of her grip. As it twirled across the floor she caught a glance of her attacker, and just from the knees down she realized that it wasn't Ruvik after all; the stranger was dressed in black, his legs longer and stockier than she remembered of Beacon's pale wraith. With her gun pinned beneath her and the shotgun barrel turned toward her, she kicked as hard as she could at his ankle.

It worked better than she could have hoped. The man dropped to his knees a let out a shout of pain that gave her goose bumps. As she scrambled to her feet, the flashlight rolled to a stop nearby, and with the man groaning half-collapsed on the floor, it illuminated enough of his face that she recognized at once who it was.

Juli's mind went blank. "Seba—"

With a growl, he coiled his legs beneath him and charged. He had so much weight and strength over her that even in agony he lifted her clear off her feet. Something hard clipped her in the lower back and she tumbled over it, banging her shoulders and knees, until she was on her back with slick metal all around and no leverage. By the time she was able to orient herself and look up, the shotgun was aimed at her face.

"Sebastian, wait!" She held her hands over her head. "It's me—don't shoot!"

He didn't shoot, but he didn't lower the gun, either. His breath wheezed and his face, only its bare contours visible, twisted with pain and distrust. "Kidman?"

"Yeah, it's me." Juli grinned, dizzy with relief at seeing him alive, but his finger was still tight around the trigger. She licked her lips. "Listen, I know you don't have any reason to trust me, but please at least hear me out before you shoot me."

"You're Mobius," he said.

Juli grimaced. Part of her wanted to shove the gun away and chew him out for everything she'd been through and risked in the name of avenging _him_ , but then she remembered their last meeting. "I'm not Mobius," she said, but that only made Sebastian tense more, so she added, "Not anymore. I was—I didn't know who they really were, what they were capable of. But I see it now, and the only reason I'm still with them is to stop them. And to help Joseph."

Sebastian's shoulders fell. "He's alive?"

"Yes," she said quickly. "Yes, Joseph's alive. He's in trouble but we can still get him out."

Sebastian lowered the gun. The strength seemed to flood out of him, and he had to grip the edge of the tub to stay upright. When even that wasn't enough, his elbow buckled, and he dropped out of sight.

"Sebastian?" Juli holstered her gun and then climbed out of the tub. The flashlight was nearby, so she grabbed it up knelt next to him as he leaned back against the tub. "Are you all right?"

"You kicked the shit outta me," Sebastian complained, hissing as he tugged at his pant leg. "Fuck."

"Sorry," said Juli. "But you _were_ about to blow my head off."

He sighed. "Yeah. But so were _you_."

Juli smiled despite herself. With the flashlight in hand she could finally get a decent look at his face, and the wry curl of his lip was so familiar her chest swelled with unexpected sentiment. "God damn it, I'm so glad you're alive," she blurted out before knowing the words were in her. "Everyone at Mobius thinks you're dead."

"Good—that was the idea." Sebastian finally managed to settle into a position he was satisfied with. "Tell me about Joseph," he said. "Is he all right? What has Mobius been doing to him?"

"He's...." Juli tried not to wince. _I can't tell him that they're cutting into him as we speak,_ she thought. Her stomach turned. _Let alone that it's his own wife doing it. Oh God, I have to tell him, don't I?_ She looked into his face, weary but expectant, and had no idea where to begin. "He's all right. At least, physically, he's all right. But they're—"

She was interrupted by a high pitched wail, the likes of which she'd never heard before. It shrieked in circles around her skull, even when she covered her ears, until her hands shook and her eyes watered. She was only half aware of Sebastian shuddering next to her in a like state. Her bones reverberated with the power of it, and then just as suddenly as it had attacked, it was gone, leaving only spots in her vision to be blinked away.

"What..." Juli pulled her gun out again. "What the fuck was that?"

Sebastian scrubbed his wrist across his eyes. "Ruvik," he breathed. He looked even more affected than Juli, and he had a hard time grabbing for the edge of the tub behind him. "Help me up."

She did so, and when Sebastian pointed to the door, she finally recognized an aluminum crutch lying on the ground as the item he'd dropped before. "Ruvik's here," she said urgently as she retrieved it for him. "Shit, I knew it had to be him. Maybe he never left?" She helped Sebastian transfer his weight to the crutch. "Could he have been here all this time right under our nose?"

Sebastian made a face she couldn't interpret. "You didn't come alone, did you?" he asked. "Is it someone you trust?"

"No," Juli answered immediately. She took the lead as they hurried out of the lab as fast as Sebastian's unsteady legs would carry him. "No, his name is Lim, and he is one hundred percent Mobius. He's got more than a few screws loose but he's dangerous. If they're taking each other on, maybe I can get you out of here before either notices and then help him kill that son of a bitch Ruvik."

Sebastian fell quiet for a moment. "Is there some way I can contact you once we're out of here?"

"Nothing they wouldn't catch on to." Juli considered as they drew closer to the elevator. "But I might be able to sneak out. We could pick a meeting spot."

"You remember the night we took you out for drinks after your first closed case?" Sebastian asked. "That old bar on the south side?"

"Yeah?" Juli screwed her nose up with the memory. "God, that place was a dive."

Sebastian stopped walking, and so did she. "Do you remember the name of the bar we _didn't_ go to?"

Juli frowned, and when it came back to her, she scoffed. "Yeah," she said, and in better circumstances she might have laughed. "No one would think to look for either of us there."

"Good." Sebastian wavered on his crutch. "Come take the shotgun for a second," he said. "I need to borrow your shoulder."

"Sure." Juli accepted the gun and moved closer, allowing Sebastian to brace himself against her. He really was in shit shape, and it made her ache with sympathy. _If he's like this, he's not going to be much help. I need to get to Joseph, to undo some of the damage Mobius has done before—_

Sebastian's hand clenched around the back of her neck. She didn't think much of it until he threw his weight toward her, driving her head into the wall. Everything faded swiftly to black.


	6. Chapter 6

"I'm sorry, Kidman." Sebastian lowered her to the floor as gently as he could. "It would just take too damn long to explain."

He grabbed the shotgun and straightened back up. He considered taking the flashlight as well, but he didn't like the idea of leaving her alone in the pitch black as he had been. Instead he angled it toward the elevator and continued on. A glance back at Kidman lying unconscious by the wall made his organs squirm with guilt. _Maybe you should have let her do it,_ he thought, even as he stepped into the elevator and hit the button for the upper floor. _If she's on the inside, maybe you could get Joseph out together without Ruvik's help at all._ He made sure his handgun holster was unsnapped and then braced himself against the wall, shotgun aimed at the doors. _Then there'd be no reason to risk him and the STEM. You could just get Joseph free and run away._

The doors opened, and Sebastian held his breath. There was nothing in the hallway beyond.

 _But what if she tried to kill Ruvik and couldn't?_ Sebastian continued to ponder as he left the elevator. _She doesn't know what he's still capable of—he could destroy her with just a thought. If he killed her that would be on you_. It was too hard try to maneuver the crutch and the shotgun, so with a grimace he set the crutch up against the nearest wall and limped on without it. _And if he figured out you betrayed him…there's no telling what he'd do, or who he'd take it out on. Maybe even Bre and her daughter._ He shuddered, teeth clenched as he braced the stock to his shoulder. _You can't turn on him unless you know you can kill him. Can you kill him?_ He heard a noise from a door on the left and headed toward it. _If he's fighting this Lim character, can you just blow both their fucking heads off and be done with it?_ But then he thought of Ruvik plucking peach slices out of a can with his fingers, and for some reason the idea didn't have the same appeal it once had.

Sebastian put his shoulder to the doorframe and peeked cautiously through. The room was another lab but with the benefit of window light: metal examination tables formed a row down its center, computer desks and other pieces of equipment on either side. Ruvik was lying face down on the first of the tables, blood on his lip, seemingly unconscious. Standing beside him was a man in the process of tossing his black suit jacket onto the nearest desk. "As for me," the man said to himself as he rolled up the sleeves of his dress shirt, "I'm not much of a surgeon. So you're going to have to bear with me." He drew his handgun from the holster across his chest. "Can't think of a better way of keeping you from running off again."

He pressed the muzzle of the gun against Ruvik's ankle. Sebastian's heart skipped, and without thinking he swung through the doorway with his shotgun at the ready. "Don't move."

Lim went still, only his eyes swiveling toward the door. Recognition sparked across his face. "Castellanos."

The cold slither of his voice put Sebastian's hair on end. _Don't you fucking limp_ , he told himself as he stepped into the lab. His thigh was throbbing, but he managed to hide it fairly well as he got Lim more decidedly within his line of fire. "Put the gun down," he said. "Slowly."

"You don't remember me, do you?" Lim took a step to his right, keeping the gun trained on Ruvik as he carefully maneuvered the metal bed between them. "I'm honestly a little hurt."

"Put the gun down, _now_."

Lim trailed the muzzle of his weapon up the back of Ruvik's leg. "I'm not sure if that says more about me or you," he said, letting his aim come to rest in the crook of Ruvik's spine. "Most devoted husbands would remember when their wife introduces them to a handsome stranger."

Sebastian stopped dead. His finger quivered against the trigger and if not for Lim digging the gun into Ruvik's back he would have blown his head off. "The hell are you talking about?"

"July," said Lim, insufferably smug. "Lily's fifth birthday. Swing set."

And then he remembered: Lily in her white dress and green socks, her tiny legs kicking as she sailed back and forth; the stranger behind her, not at all out of place among the dozen other cops and their kids, one hand on her back urging her higher and higher; the subtle tension in Myra's face as she motioned him over.

" _This is Agent Lim, one of my contacts in the bureau,"_ her voice rang through Sebastian's ears. _"He has to leave now."_

The memory was suddenly so close to him he could barely breathe; he couldn't stop thinking of Lim's hand against his daughter's back, and then as it was in that moment, curled around the handle of a gun. It turned his brain to ash.

"Ah, there you go," said Lim, grinning wide. "I knew a father wouldn't forget."

Sebastian squeezed the trigger. He had enough presence of mind to aim high, but Lim anticipated him, dropping below the edge of the table as just the gun went off. Sebastian knew what was coming next, so he threw himself behind a nearby crash cart as Lim's gloved hand rounded the table leg, firing off several shots from the pistol. The bullets shattered floor tiles and clipped one of the cart's wheels. Sebastian's leg was already complaining so fiercely that he wasn't sure he would even know if he got hit, but so far it didn't seem like it, so he kept going. He scrambled behind the more robust security of a metal desk. _Two shots left._

Lim didn't give him time to get his bearings; he simply grabbed the desk by one corner and tossed it out of the way as easily as if it were a plastic toy. Another volley from his pistol chased Sebastian down the line of equipment, denting metal and breaking glass less than inches short of their target. He was a good shot and running wouldn't be an option for much longer.

Sebastian dove into cover again. He had to yank his left foot into safety when his knee refused to bend—a bullet clipped the rubber sole of his boot. "Who the fuck are you?" he shouted. "What do you know about my family?"

"'What do you know' isn't really the question you should be asking," Lim replied, his footsteps swiftly approaching. "More like, 'What did you _do_?'"

Sebastian was firing over the top of the desk before he could even finish processing the words. He missed thanks to his enemy's swift dodge, and despite the wrath in his veins he had to retreat beneath a hail of gunfire. His pulse throbbed up and down his straining limbs. _One shot left._

Then Lim was on him, one strong kick upending the desk so that it sailed over Sebastian entirely. He couldn't bring himself to run again. The shotgun shuddered in his grip like a live animal and he squeezed the trigger as soon as he had any kind of shot. Both of them fired. The heat of a bullet passed his left shoulder, but it was Lim's blood that splattered across his chest. It was the bright-eyed monster whose gun went skittering away as buckshot tore hunks out of his arm.

But it didn't stop him. Lim's body turned with the blast, and he cried out with an inhuman howl, but then his left hand wrapped around the barrel of the shotgun. He ripped it out of Sebastian's grip and wielded it backhanded, cracking the stock against Sebastian's temple.

The blow crumpled Sebastian, white in his eyes and pins and needles where his limbs had been. For several terrifying seconds he felt separated from the rest of his body, as if his brain had rattled off its stem. But he didn't pass out. The sound of the man's crooked laughter overhead stoked his anger and kept him from surrendering that easily. Groaning and half numb, he crawled until he knocked up against another of the metal tables.

"I knew you couldn't be dead," Lim crowed. When Sebastian struggled his revolver out of its holster, Lim stomped on his knuckles, grinding them into the floor until was forced to let go. He kicked the gun away. "What a waste that would be, if I never got to see this look on your face."

Sebastian growled, and as he fought to get his elbows and knees under him, he saw it: Ruvik's hunting rifle lying on the floor a few meters away. He braced himself, and when Lim stepped on his shoulder, trying to roll him, he hooked his elbow around the back of Lim's knee and yanked.

Lim reacted quickly, but he made the mistake of trying to catch himself against the table with his mangled right arm. With a yelp he buckled, and Sebastian managed to get in one good jab to his throat before he dove for the rifle. It was too far to make in one lunge, so he clawed at the tiles and shoved his with feet until the wooden stock was in his hands. He rolled onto his back, but the fucker was already on him, peeling the rifle from him and hauling him off the floor with inhuman strength. Everything spun and then Sebastian's lower back hit the edge of a table. Lim had him by the throat, pinning his shoulders to the metal.

"I almost gave up on hoping for this," said Lim, eyes wild and teeth bared as he dug his fingers into Sebastian's windpipe. Even with an arm full of holes, bone exposed at his elbow, none of Sebastian's struggles were enough to dislodge him. "But now you're here, and all that's left is to decide what I do with you. Would you prefer Heaven or Hell, Castellanos?" He chuckled low in his throat. "Would you rather see your daughter, or your wife?"

"You—" Sebastian's air was quickly cut off, leaving him to choke and writhe, enraged but helpless. The lab smeared to black at the edges and suddenly he wasn't even in pain any more. He could feel his left leg clearly as if there had never been a bullet in it at all. It seemed like a strange blessing for a dying man, until he glanced over Lim's shoulder and saw Ruvik straightening up on the lab table.

Sebastian drew his knee in, wedging it against Lim's chest. Lim must have noticed how he'd been favoring it and wasn't prepared; with his right side already compromised he was easily tossed back. Sebastian's body surged with newfound strength and he pursued, shoving Lim directly into Ruvik's range.

Ruvik pounced. In an instant he had the pry bar lodged under Lim's chin and he pulled, his feet hooked over the edge of the bed to give him more leverage. Lim struggled, but his spine was arched against Ruvik's knees, keeping him from getting his weight where he needed it. Watching his eyes bulge with sudden panic filled Sebastian with a morbid exhilaration.

"You've got something to say about my wife?" Sebastian snarled. All his pains and injuries were forgotten as punched Lim hard in the base of his sternum, forcing what breath he did have out of his lungs. "My _daughter_?" Again, harder—he wanted to see the bastard turn blue. "You piece of Mobius shit, was it you?" He punched Lim in the face; blood smeared on his knuckles as Ruvik held fast. "Did you _fucking kill them?"_

Lim stopped trying to pull the pry bar away from his throat and instead lashed out, grabbing Sebastian by his gun harness. A firm yank drew them sharply together, and Sebastian saw stars when his forehead smacked into Lim's chin. He stumbled back, giving Lim enough time and space to flip a startled Ruvik over his shoulder. The three of them tangled on the cold tile floor, but Sebastian was still free of pain, still blazing with righteous anger, and he regained himself first. With only fury guiding him he snatched up the rifle and smashed the butt of the stock into Lim's face. Then at last Lim was on his back, and Sebastian put his boot to the man's throat, the muzzle to his eye socket. His finger wrapped around the trigger.

"Don't kill him!" shouted Ruvik.

Sebastian had already put so much force into squeezing that stopping himself sent a ripple all down his bones. His breath heaved through his lungs. _Kill him_. He watched Lim squirm, whose one hand pushing futilely at his boot while other, bloodied one gripped the rifle barrel. _Kill him right now._ His hands clenched.

"Don't kill him," Ruvik said again, pulling himself upright against the examination table.

"Why not?" Sebastian growled. "Didn't you hear what he said? He's the one who—"

"I know." Once Ruvik was steady on his feet he moved alongside Sebastian. "But we can use him. We need to—"

"He killed them!" He ground the rifle into Lim's eye and got a chill when Lim groaned in complaint. "He fucking—you heard him, he—"

" _I know_." Ruvik moved in front of him so Sebastian could see the hard expression on his face. "And I understand, you know I do. But right now we need him if we're going to find Joseph."

Sebastian's shoulders hunched and his jaws ached. His hands shook against the gun and he wondered if he could even continue to exist if he didn't squeeze the trigger. But then Juli's voice came back to him, urgent but hopeful, and with a moan that was almost a sob he backed off.

Ruvik gave Lim a kick to the side of the head, finally rendering him unconscious. As he crouched down to inspect the damage, Sebastian pried his hands off the rifle and let it fall. It was over. He leaned against the table, breathing hard and utterly dazed, up until the pain suddenly returned to his overworked body. A brand new level of agony splintered up and down his thigh, his throat, his bruised temple, and with a strangled yell he collapsed.

Everything went black. Sebastian didn't know for how long, and then Ruvik was smoothing his hair from his forehead, shining the flashlight into his eyes. "Sebastian?"

" _Fuck_." Sebastian shuddered on his back as every breath and movement threatened to make him vomit. "Fuck, you could have warned me."

"Sorry," Ruvik said, making Sebastian wonder just how hard Lim had him both of them. "I can only focus on so many things at once." He turned the flashlight away. "At least it doesn't look like you have a concussion."

He crawled away. Sebastian didn't bother to wonder what he was up to at first, as keeping from passing out again was using up all his viable energy. He squeezed his eyes shut and gagged at the thought of Lim's hand against his daughter's back.

Gradually, everything stopped spinning, and only then did Sebastian force himself into a sitting position. Ruvik was kneeling by Lim's head, both palms flat to his temples, his own eyes closed in deep concentration. Sebastian let him be as long as he could stand to. "Well?" he asked. "Do you know him? I think...his name is Lim."

Ruvik looked up, intrigued. " _Agent_ Lim? Well, that answers some questions."

"You do know something?" Sebastian dragged himself closer. "Who the hell is he?"

"We've never met before now, but I've heard rumors. He's one of Mobius' test subjects." He peeled Lim's eye open and shined the flashlight on it, displaying the eerie green color it reflected back. "He's undergone some experimental procedures, it looks like. All in the name of human perfection." He scoffed. "He's tough but he could use some work."

"You should have let me kill him."

"Not until he's outlived his usefulness…."

Ruvik put his hands again to Lim's temples. After a moment his brow furrowed, and Sebastian winced as echoes of the terrible, ear-splitting whine rippled through the air. Ruvik pulled quickly back. "Damn."

Sebastian rubbed his forehead; the last thing he needed was an even worse headache. "What's the matter?"

"He's had some kind of mental training in addition to Mobius' infusion," said Ruvik, straightening up. "Whenever I try to get into his mind, it fights back."

 _Is that what happened down in the lab?_ "I thought what you could do is one of a kind," he muttered. "How could Mobius already be training their people to fight against it?"

"I don't think it's meant for me." Ruvik shook his head. "It doesn't matter—I might be able to force through it, except…." He shifted on his knees anxiously, hiding something, but then his gaze flicked to Sebastian. Something bright and excited shone in his pale eyes.

Sebastian gulped. "What?"

Ruvik hesitated a moment longer before finally saying, "I need your help."

" _My_ help?" He wished all over again that he had burned Beacon to the ground when he had the chance. "How?"

"If the STEM were active, I would have no trouble breaking through his defenses," said Ruvik. "But I have limits, now." He frowned. "My mind is not as firmly rooted to my physical body as I would like it to be. By exerting my mind, it leaves my body vulnerable."

Sebastian watched him closely. "Vulnerable to what?"

The answer was all but visible on Ruvik's lips, but he managed to swallow it down. "You, on the other hand, have a very strong connection," he continued. "Especially because of the amount of pain you're in, no offense. And I can connect very easily to you. I think that maybe I can use you as an anchor."

 _No_. Sebastian's basest instincts were firing on all cylinders, and if he'd had the strength he would have left the room. _No, don't you fucking dare._ "You want me to invade his mind with you?"

"It wouldn't be that different than what you're used to from me," said Ruvik, which was not at all reassuring. "And it's the only way to learn what he knows. Isn't that what you want? He may know what happened to your wife."

Sebastian looked at Lim's bloody mess of a face, and a swell of panic crushed his lungs against his ribs. He wanted to know—wanted the truth so badly it was agony, but he had witnessed what Mobius was capable of, and he dreaded imagining that cruelty inflicted on Myra.

"Only if we kill him afterwards," he heard himself say. "He deserves to die."

"He deserves _worse_ ," said Ruvik. "And who knows worse better than you and I?" He offered his hand. "Help me hurt him."

It was an insanity he couldn't pass up. Sebastian reached for him, hesitated, and finally closed the distance. He was sweating and breathless, but he curled his fingers around Ruvik's hand and gripped him tight. _Now you've done it_ , he thought as the lab began to change around them. _You've sold your fucking soul._

At first, everything turned black. Even the flashlight extinguished, and Sebastian wavered dizzily in the indeterminable space as his ears hummed with the telltale invasion of Ruvik's mind. He could hear metal scraping somewhere in the black, wind rattling the windows and Lim groaning from further away than he had been a moment ago. Then a single florescent light flickered to life overhead, setting the stage: one of the examination tables had twisted itself upright like a torture rack, and coils of barbed wire had bound Lim against it. The rusty metal circled his wrists and ankles, his waist and neck. Blood oozed in thick streams from every severed artery.

Sebastian took it in. The air was sour but it tasted _real_ , as real as the light stinging his eyes and the lab's rotting walls. It was every bit the Beacon nightmare he remembered and he already hated himself for giving in to it. When Ruvik stood, so did he, without so much as a twinge from his healing wounds. He told himself as he had a hundred times before that it was only a lunatic's painted fantasy, but he couldn't quite make himself believe it. He was too eager to see Lim's blood dripping to the floor for it to not be real. He looked to Ruvik to know what came next, and jumped at the sight: instead of Leslie's soft hair and pale skin he was met with burn scars and a Plexiglas brain case half hidden beneath a singed white hood.

Ruvik noticed him staring. "What?"

"Nothing, I just…." Sebastian swallowed hard. "I almost forgot you looked like that."

Ruvik frowned and traced the scars along his jaw with one finger. "I suppose that subconsciously, this is still how I see myself," he said thoughtfully.

Lim groaned and began to struggle, drawing their attention. His eyes opened and immediately he began to pull at the wires, gasping when the barbs tore deeper into his skin. Sebastian wasn't sure what was he supposed to feel, what he expected or wanted to feel, but watching Lim suffer made his skin crackle like live wire. Without Ruvik's hand still tight around his, he honestly didn't know if he would be at Lim's throat or out the door.

Lim's eyes gleamed brighter than ever as they rolled in his head, finally landing on Ruvik and Sebastian. He stopped fighting against the wires and laughed. _Unhinged_ said the shrill scrape of his voice. "She was right," he croaked. "She was right about you."

Ruvik let go of Sebastian and instead put his hand to his back. "He's all yours," he said.

Sebastian let the gentle push propel him forward. It only took three steps to put him and his enemy face to face, and at that close the stench of blood from Lim's many wounds threatened to suffocate him. He breathed it in anyway. "Lim," he said. He didn't recognize the sound of his voice. "You're going to answer my questions."

"I'm always honest," Lim replied, pressing back against the examination table as much as he could to keep the barbs off his throat. There was a hint of a grin in the upturn of his lips, but his body was spring-taut, ready to exploit any opening. "All you have to do is ask."

"Did you kill my daughter?" asked Sebastian, quaking around the words.

Lim's eyes narrowed. "Mostly?"

Sebastian punched him in the stomach; Lim flinched, rocking against the wires, gagging and squirming. "What the fuck does that mean?"

"It's…." Lim sprayed blood when he coughed and then licked it from his lips. "It's complicated," he said, and then he chuckled wetly. "So many of us bare the blame. Even you."

Sebastian grabbed him by the front of the shirt and pulled. Lim tried not to struggle at first, but as his skin opened in jagged slits his composure began to falter. "Yes," he wheezed as one point scratched dangerously close to his jugular. "Yes, I set the fire."

"Why?" Sebastian demanded, not easing up. "She was only a child, you sick bastard! Why her?"

"Because…." Lim's crazed smile returned. "Because I promised Myra that I would."

Anger exploded behind Sebastian's eyes, and his body acted without him, punching Lim in the jaw. The blow turned Lim's head and tore his throat open, but even with blood pouring down his chest he could still laugh. Even when Sebastian hit him again and again, knocking teeth loose, Lim gurgled and shuddered and kept on laughing.

"You can't kill me," he goaded. He spit blood across Sebastian's face. "I know this isn't real."

"You mother fucker—"

Sebastian pulled his arm back, but before he could throw another punch, Ruvik touched his arm. "Sebastian," he said, and though he urged Sebastian to stop, his eyes and voice were bright with approval that made Sebastian sick. "Allow me."

Lim eyed Ruvik's approach with what might have been real concern, though he tried to hide it. "The Ruvik himself," he said. "Gutierrez told me you were _ugly_ , but—"

Ruvik dug his fingers into Lim's wounded arm and pulled. Something gave way with a horrible _snap_ that had even Sebastian cringing, and Lim screamed, trying in vain to draw away. "Death should be the least of your concerns," said Ruvik, reaching deeper into Lim's meat. "Death is release, a peaceful oblivion. When we're through with you, you will _beg_ for death."

He yanked again, and Lim cried out as his elbow bent outward against the joint. Bile burned Sebastian's throat but he couldn't look away from the grotesque spectacle. "Now," said Ruvik, tugging at Lim's biceps. "Is Detective Joseph Oda alive?"

"Yes," Lim sputtered, eyes rolled back as he quivered against the metal at his back. "Yes, he's alive. He's...they're...conditioning him."

"Conditioning," Ruvik echoed. He shoved his thumb through one of the bullet holes in Lim's arm and twisted his wrist. "You mean, brainwashing?"

Lim writhed, but it only made his elbow grind and pop, and with a whimper he tried to stay still. "Yes...yes.... They took him...to Adam."

"Who the hell is that?" Sebastian demanded

Lim started to answer, but then his lips pulled back in a grin that was mostly snarl, and he giggled. "Adam is Mobius' administrator," Ruvik answered in his stead. "One of the 'greedy imbeciles' we were talking about."

Lim's humor grew pained, and he sagged against the wires. "He's going to be disappointed in me," he said miserably.

"Where is he?" Ruvik asked, and when Lim offered only unintelligible mutterings in response, he raked his fingernails down the muscle he'd exposed. "Where is he, Lim?"

Lim wheezed and gagged; Sebastian closely watched his every quiver, absorbed every sound of pain. He didn't know how much more either of them could take, and then he noticed it: a blood stain stretching in a Y shape down Lim's chest that neither he nor Ruvik had been the cause of. "Ruvik," he said, pointing it out. "Wait."

Ruvik hummed curiously as he ripped Lim's shirt open. An autopsy scar crossed the man's chest, and though the edges looked to have healed years ago, toward the center the skin was split and oozing. "Interesting," said Ruvik, prodding with two fingers at where the wounds met. "Is this how you see yourself, Lim?" He pushed in to the knuckles. "A fresh corpse?"

"I wouldn't do that," Lim warned.

Ruvik probed around for a moment, looking for a reaction, but Lim was suddenly very calm. It was almost more nauseating than when he'd struggled, and Sebastian shifted back and forth, working himself up to stopping them. Then Ruvik flinched back and quickly tugged his hand free. He stared at the incision, startled but also clearly intrigued.

 _You don't want to know_ , Sebastian told himself. He took a breath. _Don't even ask._ "What is it?"

Instead of answering, Ruvik reached forward again. With more care than before he nudged his thumbs into the wound and peeled the flesh back. Sebastian couldn't bring himself to breathe as he watched, his body drawn as tight as if the barbs were in his skin, too. As Ruvik continued to pull, he opened a four inch wide hole to reveal not a sternum, but a bloodied orbital socket and a human eyeball staring back at them.

Sebastian recoiled. "What the fuck _is_ _that_?"

The thing moved. The skin stretched across Lim's chest flexed and tightened as the skull inside turned in place, revealing the broken ridge of a nose, a flash of long teeth, resting with the other eye peering out, shifting back and forth between them. Even Ruvik lurched back, though he was alight with fascination. "Very interesting," he whispered.

The eye blinked, though its eyelid was little more than a ruddy membrane. _Fuck this_ , Sebastian thought, and he surged forward, grabbing Lim's shoulder. "What the fuck is that?" he hollered, shaking him, his wits scattered. "What the fuck are you? _What is that_?"

"It's—" Lim cut himself off with another choking laugh. "It's what Mobius did for me." He smacked his red lips and his incision bulged as if the face in place of his ribs was doing the same. "What your friend has to look forward to."

Sebastian shuddered with revulsion. "Where is he?" He grabbed Lim's collar and pulled, forcing the barbed wire deeper into his neck. "Where is Mobius? Tell me, God damn it, or I'll cut your fucking head off!"

"It's—it's too late." Lim made a horrible, bubbling sound, but he still managed to look Sebastian straight in the eye. "You want to know where Mobius is," he hissed, "go ask your fucking wife."

Sebastian had had enough. Horror and frustration boiled in him to overflowing and steamed through his skin. He thought of Lim's hand on Lily's back, of a tiny body cracked open with a corpse behind its ribs, but more than anything else, of his house engulfed in blistering red fire. He remembered being dragged back as Hell engulfed the home he'd made, the blaze searing his eyes and smoke burrowing into every pore, every cell. He remembered waking up in the night again and again, made mad with the hope that his little girl had suffocated before the fire blackened every part of her.

And now Lim was part of that memory, brilliant orange reflected in his inhuman eyes as he set it all aflame, and all Sebastian could think was, _He deserves to burn._

Fire rippled out from under Sebastian's hands. Within seconds it caught on Lim's clothing and spread in all directions, down to his hands and feet, up into his hair. It happened so suddenly that Sebastian's fingers were red with burns by the time he retreated, and he stared, captivated, as Lim was swiftly consumed. The mangled arm, shit-eating grin and repulsive eye disappeared within an inferno, and the scream that came out of the burning husk threatened Sebastian's sanity. But he stayed rooted to the spot, heart racing as he watched. He needed to watch.

It was the noise he knew so well that woke him from his trance. It spread from Ruvik in waves that jarred the entire makeup of the lab around them, and Sebastian almost fell to his knees beneath its weight. He turned, and was struck by the look of child-like terror on Ruvik's face. It was almost as disturbing as the cause, and Sebastian was so taken in he almost didn't notice the creature stalking toward them.

It hid itself in the pulses. At first Sebastian thought that Lim's ridiculous parasite had escaped the fire and was aiming for vengeance, but the thing was entirely black, a roiling mass of wormlike tentacles that scuttled on spider's legs. He had seen worse in the depths of Ruvik's world. But then the creature abruptly picked up speed and jumped, latching onto Ruvik's back.

Ruvik rocked with the impact, and he fought back, but the creature jabbed its insectoid legs into the seams all along his scalp. Though it had nothing approaching a mouth or face it wailed as it ripped at Ruvik's head, trying to pry the brain plate loose.

"Ruvik—" Sebastian grabbed at the thing, but it was wet and squished beneath his hands, and he couldn't get a proper grip. "Get off!" Sebastian hollered, yanking at the twisting mass. He tore the limbs off one by one as Ruvik pushed futilely at the body. "Get the fuck off—just fucking—"

He snapped awake. Sebastian blinked around in confusion and found himself sitting on the tiled floor of the lab, Ruvik's hand still in his and Lim twitching and mumbling on the floor. His hands weren't burned and neither was Lim—there weren't even wire marks in his throat. _It wasn't real_. He panted, dizzy and in pain again, as he tried to feel human. _It's just dreams after all._

The hand in his gave a sharp jerk; Ruvik, back in Leslie's body, had collapsed over his knees and was shaking, his muscles tightly wound and eyes wide and blind. He looked just like he had in the mansion, and Sebastian cursed as he drew him closer.

"Ruvik?" Sebastian cradled Ruvik against his good knee. He knew better than to try and restrain him, but he didn't want him banging his head against the floor, either. "Shit, Ruvik, you never told me how to handle this. Is that thing still attacking you?" He didn't know what else to do, so he sank his fingers into Ruvik's hair and pulled, trying to free him of an invisible monster. "Fight it, Ruvik," he hissed. He rubbed Ruvik's forehead and temples to try and coax him back. "Come on, you little shit, you can't die after _all that_."

__

Ruvik drew in a loud gasp, and though he was still shaking, his movements changed; he wasn't seizing so much as trying and failing to control his limbs. Sebastian hooked an arm under his shoulders to support him. "Ruvik," he said, as calmly and firmly as he could manage. "It's me—it's Sebastian. Can you hear me?"

Ruvik's eyes swiveled toward him, but they fell short, still blinded by whatever fit he was experiencing. "Seb?" He pawed at Sebastian's chest. "Can't—I can't—"

Sebastian took his hand and squeezed. "It's me," he said. "Try to calm down—I've got you."

"Can't fee…." Ruvik squirmed touched his face, but whatever he was trying to do, it wasn't working. "Pain," he gasped, kicking his heels into the floor. He yanked at Sebastian's hand. "Hurt me."

Sebastian blinked. "What?"

" _Hurt me_." Ruvik grabbed at his chest again and then clumsily felt his way up until he'd found Sebastian's jaw. With a groan he shoved his fingers into Sebastian's mouth.

"The fu—"

Sebastian tried to rear back, but Ruvik hooked his fingertips over his bottom teeth. "Bite," Ruvik said insistently. "Bite!"

Sebastian was pretty sure he couldn't feel any crazier. He bit down hard, wincing when Ruvik hissed and wriggled against his lap. But it worked; gradually Ruvik's breath evened out and he began to relax. By the time his shaking had stopped, he was nudging Sebastian's jaw to get him to let go. "I'm okay," he said, cradling his bruised fingers against his chest. He closed his eyes. "Thank you."

Sebastian was too tired to find his apparent sincerity surprising. He took a moment to catch his own breath before asking, "What the hell was that thing? Was it Lim?"

"No." Ruvik gave his face a rub and then finally worked himself up into a sitting position. He still looked shaken. "No, it's…complicated."

"More complicated than _that_?" Sebastian pointed emphatically at the catatonic Agent Lim. "What the fuck was that thing in him? What did Mobius do—is that what they're doing to Joseph? To _Myra_? What is 'conditioning', what—"

"We should leave," Ruvik interrupted. He used Sebastian's shoulder to help him stand. "If he goes too long without checking in, Mobius will follow up, and neither of us are in any condition to handle another team."

"Wha…." Sebastian tried to follow suit, but he couldn't get his leg beneath him. It wasn't until Ruvik offered both hands that he was able to stand up. "I'm losing my God damn mind," he muttered as Ruvik helped him to lean against the examination table. "I don't know if I can do this anymore."

"Breathe," said Ruvik, though he sounded like he needed to follow his own advice. "It's over, Sebastian. We're all right." He gave Sebastian's jaw a light tap to keep him focused. "What did you do with Kidman?"

"What?" Sebastian stared blearily at him. "You knew it was Kidman? Why didn't you tell me?"

"Because I was hoping you'd feel shocked and betrayed enough to kill her," Ruvik admitted. He took a few steps away to test his balance, and seemingly pleased with his recovery, moved about the room to collect their guns. "She's more of a threat to me than the others—they at least would rather take me alive."

Sebastian rubbed his mouth; he could still taste Ruvik on his tongue. "We could just explain it to her," he suggested, but as soon as the words were out, he doubted them. "So why didn't you just kill her yourself? You could have, right? Or is she protected like _him_?"

"I could have killed her." Ruvik came back and piled their weapons on the table. "But she's not technically Mobius. I thought it might count as breaking our conditions."

"Yes," Sebastian said immediately. "Yes, it would. So don't kill her."

Ruvik sighed. "Fine." He grabbed up his flashlight. "Where did you leave our supplies?"

"Back in the lab. And…my crutch is out in the hall."

"All right. Wait here."

Ruvik turned to go, but Sebastian was just fast enough to catch his elbow. "Wait," he said. The thought of being in the room alone with that blinking eye made him feel faint. "What do we do with…."

They both glanced to Lim. He was still shaking against the floor, still staring blindly at the ceiling. It made Sebastian's skin crawl.

"Do what you want with him," said Ruvik, his voice distant with bitterness. "Kill him, cripple him." His gaze was hard, and Sebastian regretted meeting it. "He killed your family, Sebastian. He deserves whatever fate you hand him."

Ruvik left, and Sebastian remained still for a long time, watching Lim's chest rise and fall. He took his revolver off the table and cocked the hammer back. He put Lim's head in the sights, fingered the trigger. He couldn't breathe.

***

When Ruvik came back, Sebastian was leaning against the wall outside the lab. His shotgun and revolver were holstered and the rifle was in his hands. Ruvik traded the rifle for the crutch and then peeked into the room, even though he already had a feeling as to what Sebastian's decision had been. As expected, Lim was right where he'd fallen, oblivious but still alive.

"If I kill him, Mobius will find him," said Sebastian quietly, eyes downcast. "Which will leave Kidman to try to explain what happened. They'd kill her, wouldn't they? If they thought for a second that she betrayed them?"

"Yes," said Ruvik. "She was only at Beacon in the first place because she was expendable. Any suspicion would get her killed."

Sebastian's shoulders sagged with relief as he nodded, as if he had been just that eager for Ruvik to validate his choice. "Then let's get the fuck out of here."

Ruvik agreed, and together they retreated into the night.


	7. Chapter 7

When they were finished, Myra headed into the locker room to change out of her scrubs. She'd managed to not get much blood on them, but she was still careful to touch as little as possible as she tossed them into the proper receptacle. She told herself that the worst was over. There would be follow ups, but for the moment, everything was progressing as it was meant to, and it would only get easier. She'd never have to see Joseph like that again.

And yet, as she buttoned her shirt up, her hands started shaking. She couldn't get her fingers to work as she wanted, and she quickly gave up, sitting down on the nearest bench. It didn't make any sense. She held her hands up in front of her and watched them bitterly, thinking, _After all this time, how can I still have any fear left?_

There was a knock on the door, and Tatiana entered without waiting for a reply. She closed it behind her quickly, but Myra caught a glance of Dennis shuffling about in the hall beyond. He wasn't involved in conditioning so she had no idea why he might be hanging around, and that alone made her anxious.

"Myra," said Tatiana, sitting down next to her. She hadn't changed out of her scrubs, and Myra tried not to look at the smear of blood on her sleeve. "How are you holding up?"

"You don't have to worry about me," Myra said quickly. She started buttoning her shirt again, though she didn't have much more success than the first time. "The worst is over, and I'm still here, aren't I?"

"So you say." Tatiana watched her struggle for a moment and then stood up. She took Myra's hands, using them to draw Myra to her feet. "But I know how hard it was on you, the last time," she said as she buttoned Myra's shirt for her. "I'm going to be watching you. You'll tell me if it becomes too much, won't you?"

"Of course," said Myra, letting her do as she pleased, but when it looked like Tatiana was about to say more, she brushed past her to get her pants from her locker. "What does Dennis want?"

Tatiana waited for her to finish dressing before she answered. "Lim took Kidman out to Beacon tonight," she said, and Myra's heart gave a thud. "Apparently there was trouble, but Dennis didn't want to interrupt us until the procedure was finished."

There was only one kind of trouble Myra could imagining them finding at the hospital, and her imagination raced with possibilities. "Are they all right?"

"No." Tatiana continued to watch her very closely. "Well, Kidman will be. But if Dennis isn't exaggerating, Lim might not."

Myra wasn't quite sure what to make of the thrill that passed through her. She hoped to God it didn't show in her face. "Take me to him."

***

Ruvik drove them home. There were few enough cars on the road that it didn't give him any trouble, and it kept his mind relatively focused. Parts of him were reeling from the events at Beacon, and he feared that reality might at any moment scatter out from beneath his fingers like frightened mice. But whenever the feeling got too strong, he looked to his anchor, and he found stability again.

Sebastian was slumped in the passenger seat, eyes downcast and breath heavy the entire way back to the apartment complex. He didn't speak, but he didn't have to; Ruvik could feel the waves of grief and frustration pouring from him, the anger drawing him taut as he quivered beneath his sweet. His pain was so familiar to Ruvik that even without tangled neurons or psychic powers they would have been resonating on the same frequency. It was exciting and disgusting in equal measure, and fascination kept Ruvik firmly rooted in the world of his own senses.

Once they'd parked outside the complex, Ruvik moved quickly to the passenger door. "Fuck," Sebastian muttered, and he hissed through his clenched teeth as Ruvik helped helped him climb out. "Fuck this."

"Lean on me," said Ruvik. Even when they'd managed to get Sebastian on his crutch, his legs weren't up to the task of carrying him far. Ruvik relieved him of his weapons and left them in the truck with their supplies for the time being, focusing instead on assisting Sebastian into the building and up the stairs. Sebastian's hand tight on his shoulder, breath hot on his ear, reminded him too well of fleeing his mansion home into a rotten field. He was both grateful and disappointed when they reached the door to the apartment.

"I can make it from here," Sebastian muttered.

Ruvik unlocked and opened the door for him. "It's only a little further."

"Go on," he insisted. "I don't like our stuff sitting out in the truck."

He hobbled inside and didn't seem about to collapse, so Ruvik went back to the parking lot. Thankfully, there was no one around to see him hauling several guns and a stuffed pillowcase up the stairs to the second floor. Once everything was safely inside with the door closed, he ought to have felt some relief. Instead he tingled with cold and found himself looking from one corner of the room to the next. He rubbed his hands together as he ventured into the main room in search of Sebastian.

He found him on the sofa, legs sprawled out, drinking from a bottle of tequila. He frowned. "Didn't Bre say—"

"Don't," Sebastian grunted. He had been in rough shape going into Beacon, but the fight with Lim had left him with fresh bruises on his face and neck, burst blood vessels in his eye, making his appearance all the more frightful. "Not now."

Ruvik ventured closer as Sebastian downed another long gulp. "That's not a good idea," he said. "You haven't come close to—"

"I don't want to hear it." Sebastian glared back in defiance, but exhaustion was already wearing his anger thin. He started to drink again and then stopped, his hand shaking around the neck of the bottle. "I just…." He rubbed his eyes, grimacing. "I need to stop thinking for a while," he said hoarsely.

Ruvik watched him, every shift and flinch and grumble digging under his skin. It would be easier for both of them if Sebastian just stopped thinking for a while. He came closer, and when he was standing beside Sebastian he reached ouch, touching his fingertips to his unblemished temple.

Sebastian quickly snagged his wrist. "No." He drew the hand back and waited until Ruvik had retreated a step to let go. "Don't do that." He leaned his elbow into his knee, his head into his palm. "I can't let you...erase this. Not this."

Ruvik fingered the point of his wrist where Sebastian had touched him. "Was what Lim said really so shocking?" he asked. "You've been convinced all along that the fire wasn't an accident."

"I wasn't supposed to be _right_." He raked his fingernails through his hair and took another drink. "The fire was a freak accident—Myra left me because I couldn't cope. Everyone said so. It made sense. But now…." He straightened up abruptly, thumping his bottle onto the coffee table. "But now I know that sick fuck was behind it. They'd dead, they're both dead, and…Christ, you of all people know what they must have put her through. I should have killed him." He sank back into the couch cushions, though he was still taut and anxious. "I should have burned him alive for real."

Ruvik shivered. He hated shivering. His stomach turned with the memory of Agent Lim bursting into flames before his eyes, with the heat that clung to his skin and the stench of roasting meat in his nostrils. Even so, he couldn't look away. He listened closely for every hitch in Sebastian's breath and studied the quiver in his upper lip. He remembered bitterness like this. He didn't want anyone to erase it from him, either.

"You probably made the right choice," he said slowly. "Sparing him spared Kidman, and her being on the inside might give us the opportunity we need. Besides, you'll get another chance, I'm sure."

Sebastian was quiet for a long time. He stared down at his hands, scrubbing his thumb back and forth over a spot of blood. Finally, he took a deep breath. "What did it feel like, Ruvik?"

Ruvik gathered himself up. "What?"

"When they burned you," he said, and suddenly the room seemed much larger, his words echoing off the walls. "I saw it, in your mind. Saw your scars. What was it like?"

Ruvik swallowed, and then berated himself. He ought to have been furious, but his pulse was suddenly throbbing hard enough that he nearly swayed on his feet. "I know you're not asking because you feel guilty about Lim," he said.

"I want to know." Sebastian lifted his head, and their eyes met. "You could show me."

He offered his hand. Ruvik eyed it as if it were burning coals ready to catch fire at any moment. Already that history was too close to his surface; with his mind bruised and weary, it wouldn't take much to summon that childhood horror which had for decades smoldered at the heart of him. He could do more than revisit it, he could _bestow_ it. He could take Sebastian's hand and share Hell.

"That's not what you want," Ruvik said cautiously.

"I want to know," Sebastian repeated. "I have to know what she went through because of us." He waved at Ruvik as desperation crept into his voice. "Come on, Ruvik, show me! I have to know!"

"No," said Ruvik, with more force than he'd intended. "Do you think it made it any easier for me, knowing _exactly_ what my sister went through? Suffering like she did won't absolve you of guilt."

Sebastian's expression twisted, and he let his hand fall. "Besides," Ruvik continued as Sebastian turned his head away, "didn't the coroner tell you that she suffocated before the fire reached her?"

"He said…." Sebastian scrubbed his mouth with shaking hands. "He said she was so small, her…." His throat closed around the words. "Her lungs," he tried again, gesturing vaguely to his chest. "They were…they wouldn't have…."

The rest of his strength left him in a rush. "She was so small," he said, voice breaking as he crumpled into his hands. His shoulders hitched and his breath shuddered and heaved. "She was so small…."

Ruvik was transfixed by the sight of him. The echoes of Sebastian's grief rippled along his sinews like nothing he'd felt in ages. He'd spent the better part of his life consuming the pain, anger, fear, and helplessness of others, but this was something else—something he couldn't allow himself to indulge in, even if he'd had the patience to replicate it. He wouldn't have thought he was capable of mourning anymore. But as he watched Sebastian dig fingernails into his scalp, he found the sensation was still in him after all.

Ruvik sat down on the sofa and leaned into Sebastian's shoulder. He wanted to feel every quiver run through his heated body. He wanted to taste every haggard breath through his lips. He wished he could crawl into Sebastian's chest and be enveloped by every twisting rib, to recall and relive the loss that had changed his world. It was trauma that kept him close to _her_ ; he wanted to take every moment of it into himself.

"Sebastian," he said, breathless beneath the weight they shared. "I can't show you how it feels." He put his hand on Sebastian's knee and squeezed. "But I can show _them_. With your help, I can give them the Hell they deserve. We can avenge her through Lim, through Adam—every last one of them."

Sebastian fell quiet. When he moved, it was only enough so that he could see Ruvik through the gaps in his fingers. "Promise me," he said.

"I promise," Ruvik replied without hesitation. When Sebastian lowered his hand, he took it, gripping it tight. "Every last one of them will burn."

***

They arrived at the room Lim was being kept in. Myra would have liked to go in alone, but she knew that Tatiana was far too attentive to allow it, so she didn't ask. Dennis, at least, had the good sense to remain in the hall.

The inside of the room was dark, and it smelled like blood. She could hear Lim hissing and muttering over the steady blip of a heart-rate monitor—not the first time by far, but it never failed to stand her hairs on end. As they entered, Tatiana clasped her hand. She allowed it. Only a small desk lamp illuminated the space, and they followed it to Lim's bedside.

He had been stripped down, covered only by a thin sheet with gauze loosely wrapping his right arm up to the shoulder. The IV drip he was connected to was tinged with amber serum. As Myra drew closer, she realized that his eyes were open, but they didn't react to her approach, and he continued his indecipherable mumblings.

Myra licked her lips. Her mind was so well tangled it left her numb as she slipped away from Tatiana and instead touched the inside of Lim's wrist. She could already hear his pulse filling the room, but she wanted to feel it against the pads of her fingers. It was faint, but steady. Her hand curled by itself, and she would have dug in with her nails, if not for the sudden realization that there was one other person in the room, listening to him live.

"Sir," said Myra, straightening up. She turned toward a shadow-cloaked corner at the other side of the room. "Do we know what happened to him?"

The Administrator leaned forward in his chair just enough that the desk light caught his face. All signs pointed to him having planned it that way. "As you can see, he hasn't been able to give his report," he said icily. "But Agent Kidman is saying _Ruvik_ happened to him."

Myra frowned, and she moved to the other side of the bed so she could lift the gauze covering Lim's arm. The flesh was pierced and shorn in half a dozen places, most noticeably at the elbow, and was still bleeding in spots. There didn't seem to have been any effort spent in repairing the wounds. "This was a shotgun," she said. "That doesn't seem like Ruvik's MO."

"It wouldn't be the first time he's used firearms," said Tatiana. "It's how he used to hunt down potential subjects, back in Elk River."

"Possibly as recently as two nights ago," the Administrator said.

Myra tucked Lim's arm back into the gauze. "You believe Ruvik was there at the mansion when Castellanos was," she said carefully.

"The members of alpha team were recovered from the scene with three different caliber gunshot wounds. I find that difficult to explain under the assumption only one man was responsible."

Myra didn't know how to respond, so Tatiana took over. "What else did Agent Kidman report?" she asked.

"She claims not to have seen Ruvik himself." The Administrator stood and walked to Lim's bedside. "She felt his presence as he separated her from Agent Lim," he continued, without looking at either woman. "She heard the shotgun fire, and was knocked unconscious. When she woke up, she found Agent Lim like this and called it in."

Tatiana crossed her arms and frowned down at Lim thoughtfully. "Then that raises an important question about what Ruvik is really capable of, even though he's lost the machine. You can't be knocked unconscious by a presence."

"And more importantly," said the Administrator, "why he allowed her to live."

"Either of them," Myra added, and when he finally looked at her, she met his cold gaze unflinchingly. "He left Lim in one piece, too. More or less."

The Administrator continued to stare back at her, but it had been a long time since he'd caused her to sweat with one of his looks. "Tatiana," he said. "Wait for us outside."

Tatiana looked reluctant, but she did as she was told. As the door closed behind her, Myra faced the Administrator with shoulders squared. He wasn't shy, so she waited, silently attentive, for him to speak his mind.

He took his damn time in an effort to intimidate her. "Is Castellanos alive?" he asked.

"You seem to have made up your mind already," Myra replied calmly. "Why bother asking?"

"If you know something, you will tell me."

"I don't know anything," Myra said, folding her arms. "Castellanos and I were through a long time ago. What does he have to do with me now?"

The Administrator narrowed his eyes at her. She didn't flinch. "I know what you're thinking, Agent Hanson. If he's alive, I want him here, for the STEM project. Stay away from him."

Myra stared straight back at him. "I don't know what you're talking about."

He grabbed her by the wrist; Myra didn't fight it, even when he backed her up against the hospital bed, trapping her between his body and the oblivious Agent Lim. "Insubordination from you will not be tolerated a second time," he warned her. "It is Mobius that decides who lives and who dies, not you. You will follow orders."

 _You will follow orders._ The words rumbled through her, and her left hand tingled and prickled with the heat of them. Still, she stared back at him definitely. She had lived far too long on the edge of sanity to let petty threats define her. "I will follow orders," she said. "But not from you. Don't forget, _Adam_ , I'm just as much Mobius as you are."

Myra covered his hand with hers, and it only took a small amount of her strength to get him to let go. His eyes pinched with irritation but he did step back, jerkily, as if pulled by strings. He had always been formidable in his own way, but his cracks were starting to show, and Myra knew exactly where to pick.

"I'd like a moment alone with Agent Lim," she said.

The Administrator frowned, but they both knew he wasn't about to deny her. "I want him fixed," he told her sternly. "Whatever it takes."

"Of course you do." Myra turned her back on him. "I'll have a report for you by tomorrow evening."

He hesitated a beat longer, but he caught on that Myra was finished speaking. She could feel him glowering at her as he left. Only once she was more or less alone in the room did she allow herself a long, slow sigh.

Lim had quieted. Myra didn't waste any more time; there was no telling when the Administrator's impatience would get the better of him. He didn't like anyone toying with his favorite pet, after all. So she tugged the sheet away from Lim's chest and pushed hard into the cross-section of his scars.

Lim took in a sharp, shaky breath. His eyes rolled back and forth but they couldn't land on her properly. She waited to see if he would regain some sense, but when he didn't, she covered his eyes with her other hand. "Ye-Jun," she said, quiet but firm as if scolding a child. "It's me. I know you can hear me."

He squirmed beneath her hands, panting, and finally was able to form real words. "Put it out," he begged, gripping the sheet. "Put it…put it out, put...."

"Ye-Jun, focus." She rubbed his chest back and forth along the lines of his scars. "Put out what?"

" _Fire_ ," he gasped out, and Myra almost drew her hands back as if it would spring from his skin. "He lit me—it burns." He reached out blindly and found her elbow, gripping it tight. "Put me out!"

Myra watched him writhe, the hiss of the sheets blurring in her ears to flickers and pops. Her skin prickled with electricity as if currents were dancing between each bead of sweat. She thought she might vomit but she couldn't take her eyes off him. "Who?" she asked, and when her voice cracked, she gulped down a huge breath and asked again. "Who burned you, Ye-Jun?"

"It was _him_." She could feel his eyelashes fluttering against her palm. "Your…Castellanos."

Myra shuddered. Her emotions sprinted from one to the next so erratically all she could hold on to was a sick gratitude that it was Sebastian who had given her a gift like this. She leaned in closer. "He's alive," she said, voice barely above a whisper. "Sebastian is alive—you saw him?"

"Yes," Lim croaked. He tugged fitfully at her sleeve. "Yes, he and…Ruvik, they're…alive." He whimpered. "Please put me out."

"In a minute." She rubbed her thumb against the bridge of his nose as if that would be a comfort. "I need you to make me a promise."

His expression twisted with uncertainty. "That promise ran out already," he muttered.

"A new promise." Myra gave his chest another rub; he wouldn't be able to tell that her hands were shaking. "Promise me that if you see Sebastian again, you'll kill him this time." Her throat ached with the heat of the words. "Please, Ye-Jun. You know what I've been through because of him. Kill him for me."

Lim's breath hissed in and out as he considered, maybe even drifting out of consciousness again. Then he slid his hand down her arm, closing it around her fingers. "Okay," he said. He smiled crookedly. "Anything for you, Myra."

When Myra left the room, Tatiana and Dennis were still out in the hall waiting. By then her face was porcelain. "Dennis," she said, and he snapped to attention so quickly she half expected him to salute. "Find a fire extinguisher and douse Lim with it. He thinks he's on fire."

"Um, yes, ma'am." Dennis hesitated. "Should we prep the O.R. for him? His arm…."

"The serum will be enough to heal it," Tatiana said confidently. "We'll only operate if he requests it."

"Yes, ma'am."

As Dennis scuttled off, Tatiana faced Myra with a serious expression. "You look tired."

"I am tired," said Myra, though she didn't feel like it. Her pulse was aching against the walls of her arteries. "I'm going back to my room."

"You don't want to talk to Kidman?" Tatiana asked. "She's just next door."

"No, it can wait." Myra started down the hall, and was a little surprised when Tatiana didn't fall into step next to her. She paused. "You're staying?"

Tatiana nodded, though she didn't make any move to head for the room. "I want to hear her report myself. If Castellanos is alive, and he and Ruvik are working together, we may have to alter our plans for Mr. Oda."

Myra lifted her chin slightly, but otherwise didn't show any reaction in her face. "Whatever you think is best," she said, and she continued on before she could betray anything else.

She listened for Tatiana to enter Kidman's room, but even as she made the turn at the end of the hall, Tatiana hadn't moved.

***

Sebastian was used to waking up in pain. Skin throbbing against stiches, deep bruises and a pounding headache had become as familiar to him as breathing. Finding himself half-slumped on the sofa was new, but not unusual or alarming, even if it added a crick in his neck to his his many other aches and pains. What was less common, though, was waking up to Ruvik asleep against his lap.

The sofa wasn't large, but Ruvik had apparently made the most of it; he had curled his body up tight, feet against the armrest, head pillowed on Sebastian's thigh. Despite the bruise darkening his jaw, he looked remarkably peaceful. Sebastian kept still so he could watch for a while. It was different from waking up to him in the bed, when he had assumed Ruvik was just too proud to give up a mattress for the couch. Ruvik could have left him, and didn't. At some point, exhausted and bereaved, he had passed out, and Ruvik had stayed.

 _Unless it wasn't by choice._ Remembering the events at Beacon, Sebastian reached down to stroke Ruvik's temple. _Maybe that thing attacked him again, and he just passed out like this._ He traced the invisible line of Ruvik's skull window, but Ruvik only mumbled something unintelligible and settled again, making "monster-induced coma" seem less likely.

Ruvik slept on, so Sebastian didn't do anything to discourage him. It was strange but somehow relaxing to just sit for a while, the gentle weight against his lap and warm skin beneath his hand, mind idly drifting between distant speculations. Rather than worry about Mobius and its mad agents, he instead contemplated the phantoms of young Ruvik he had seen within STEM: at first curious, then desperate, then vengeful. He wondered if there had ever been any hope of Ruben Victoriano, son to a cretin and destroyed by tragedy, growing up to be anything less than a monster. How far back would one have to travel to find an untarnished version of the brilliant little boy who would one day claim to be God?

"The hell even happened to you, Ruvik?" Sebastian murmured, fingering strands of his hair, which were thin and soft like corn silk. "Did you really make that beast of a machine because you were _lonely_?"

Ruvik finally stirred. He didn't seem to realize where he was at first, as he hummed softly and even turned his face against Sebastian's palm. Then he went stiff. His eyes snapped open and he looked cautiously upward.

Sebastian lifted his hand to the back of the sofa. "Hey," he said, trying not to sound too teasing. "You're up."

Ruvik sat up and rubbed his cheek where a crease in Sebastian's pants had left its mark. He looked everywhere except Sebastian; he might have even been blushing. "Good morning," he muttered, and then he hurried upright. "I'll get us something to eat."

Sebastian relaxed into the sofa, too exhausted for quips. He even dozed off again, waking only when Ruvik returned with two bowls of oatmeal topped with banana slices, along with the bottle of painkillers. Despite still looking vaguely embarrassed, Ruvik sat down next to him and they ate together.

"I want to check your stitches when we're finished," Ruvik said. "You had a rough night."

"Yeah. I feel like I got hit by a truck." Sebastian swallowed a pair of pills with the help of the oatmeal and then cast Ruvik a sideways glance. "We are going to talk about what happened, aren't we?"

"Which part?" Ruvik asked without looking up.

"Christ, I don't know where to begin," Sebastian muttered. Every time a question bubbled up, it smeared into confusion and shame. He spied the tequila bottle still sitting on the coffee table and was tempted, until he remembered that he'd just downed a pair of OxyContin. "What about you? Are you all right?"

Ruvik poked at the bruise on his jaw. "I'm fine," he said. "I'm not as well-equipped to take a punch as you, but he didn't hit me that hard. I just wasn't prepared."

"You're not getting away with deflecting this time," Sebastian persisted. "I'm talking about the seizure."

Ruvik continued to eat as if he hadn't heard, but Sebastian kept staring at him, so he at last gave up his avoidance strategy. "I'm fine," he said again. "I appreciate you helping me."

Sebastian waited for more, and when none came, he said, "That's it?"

"What else is there to say?"

It would have been so easy to let his impatience get the better of him, and he came close. _You can't blame him_ , he told himself, remembering the feeling of Ruvik's hand tight around his as Beacon melted into nightmare around them. _You don't really want him asking about your state of mind, either, do you?_ "Ruvik," he said carefully. "Whatever comes out of this, we're in it together. Tell me what's going on with you, so I can be better prepared to help you next time."

Ruvik finished his breakfast and set the bowl aside; only then did he turn on the sofa to face Sebastian. "It wasn't…." He frowned, reconsidering his explanation. "It was working. Using you, I was able to keep the dream stable, at first. But I lost my concentration, after you…" His brow furrowed, and he blurted out, "I wasn't expecting you to light him on fire."

"It wasn't on purpose." Sebastian glanced down at his hands and half expected them to be covered in burn marks. "I didn't even know I _could_."

"Inconvenient as it was, it's a good sign," said Ruvik. "You were able to seize control of your own reality. That may prove useful to us, once we have to use the STEM against Mobius."

 _Every last one of them will burn_. Sebastian's stomach clenched, and he finished eating before his appetite could vanish entirely. "Inconvenient," he muttered. He chewed anxiously at an unfamiliar emotion. "That…couldn't have been easy for you to watch. I didn't mean for that."

Ruvik snorted. "If that's the best apology you can muster, don't bother. It was my idea to interrogate Lim and I was prepared for risk. Though admittedly, not prepared enough." He stood, heading toward a small table near the apartment's entrance. "But we did gain some valuable information. Your partner is alive, and Adam is looking after him personally. That means we can count on them not killing him anytime soon."

"Yeah, but Lim said he…." Sebastian seethed at the thought of the deranged Lim poking around in his friend's mind, but as Ruvik returned with some papers and a pen, he realized how firmly Ruvik had changed the subject. "Wait a minute. What about the monster that tried to crack your skull open?"

"That's not important now," Ruvik said. He knelt down next to the table spread Martin Rios' bills out, face down, so he had something to write on. "I want to show you something."

"It _is_ important," said Sebastian, even as Ruvik began sketching out the shape of a human face. "You can't just… _Ruvik_." It wasn't easy given the state of his legs, but Sebastian leaned forward against the table and grabbed Ruvik by the wrist. "Tell me."

Ruvik stopped, staring down at Sebastian's hand. He didn't try to pull back, but he contemplated for several beats before raising his eyes. Sebastian didn't expect him to relent after the back and forth they'd shared in Beacon's underground, but then Ruvik nodded.

"That was the first time I've gotten a good look at it," Ruvik said, and Sebastian let him go, settling back into the couch to listen. "But I've felt it at the edge of my mind for a while now. Like I told you before, when I exert my new abilities, it leaves me vulnerable. It's trying to take advantage of that vulnerability to sever my mind from my body."

"Then you asked for my help because you knew it would be there. You should have warned me." Sebastian shook his head and kept going before they could get into an argument about it. "But what _is_ it?"

Ruvik didn't answer right away, but he was getting easier to read; Sebastian could tell he was compiling an explanation rather than stalling. "Going from our metaphor before," he said, "I suppose you could call it…corrupted data, not unlike the creatures you encountered within the STEM." He continued to scrawl across the paper as he spoke. "The dreaming mind often pieces together fragments of what it perceives to be unusable date: half-registered stimuli, memories, subconscious instincts, etc. They come together within the mind to create the dream landscape and it inhabitants. That's why dreams so often feel metaphorical—they're made of building blocks your mind already carries with it."

"Monsters as metaphors," Sebastian said, his mind cycling back through the bizarre terrors he'd encountered in Ruvik's mind. "But some of those things were people once. Like—"

"That creature is not a person," Ruvik cut him off swiftly. "It's bad data, an amalgam of my…." He stopped drawing, tapping his pen against the paper as he worked the words out. "Of my fear," he finished slowly, and Sebastian sat up a little straighter. "The fear that my mind will ultimately fail to connect well enough with this body, and someone will come to take it back from me. Like the last one."

Sebastian watched Ruvk carve tiny, jagged points into the corner of his drawing. "Your own fear is trying to kill you."

"It sounds overly dramatic when you put it like that, but I suppose that's accurate." Ruvik glanced up, and when he noticed how closely Sebastian was watching him, he shook himself self-consciously and resumed his work. "It's the same for all people, really. If all of humanity had the experience of living in a dream world where their deepest fears could manifest through sheer force of will like _I_ did, we'd see a lot more ghosts like it, I'm sure."

The portrait was taking shape as a man's face, but Sebastian didn't recognize him, so he kept his focus on Ruvik. _So he does feel fear like a normal person_ , he thought, but rather than the sense of schadenfreude he thought he should be feeling, all he could think about was the terrible look on Ruvik's face as a man went up in flames. "What can I do?" he found himself asking. "The next time it happens, how do you want me to handle it?"

Ruvik looked up again, his gaze cautious and searching. He was expecting scorn, and when he didn't find it, he seemed to relax. "You were fine," he said. "If it attacks again during a dream, we can fight it off together. If not…" He curled and stretched his fingers. "When I can't reconnect with my body, the fasted route back is with pain, something persistent. Like a bite, or a hard pinch. Nothing permanent, please."

Sebastian harrumphed. "Sure." The air was starting to feel _too_ heavy, so he lightened his tone and added, "I think I can handle slapping you around, since you're asking so nicely."

Ruvik rolled his eyes, but he was obviously relieved. "All right," he said, "now that that is out of the way." He scribbled the finishing touches to his drawing and turned it around to show Sebastian. "Back to business."

Sebastian leaned closer so he could see. "This is Adam," Ruvik introduced as he looked over the sketch: the man had a long, oval face with thick brows and deep set eyes. "He's Mobius' Administrator. I assume there's an inner circle of some sort that forms the heart of the organization, but as far as I know, the Administrator wields all meaningful control at Mobius. His 'employees' are inexplicably loyal, given what a self-righteous buffoon he is."

"I don't recognize him," Sebastian murmured, committing the face to memory.

"I didn't expect you would." Ruvik began a new drawing. "I imagine he gets out about as much as I ever did. But you might as well have all the information on Mobius I can give you, limited as it is. There's no telling when it will be necessary."

"Yes—good." Sebastian nodded. "Glad we're finally on the same page." He watched with great interest as Ruvik sketched out what was looking to be a woman. "You're pretty good at that."

"My sister taught me," Ruvik said confidently. "Jimenez used to say I could write my own textbooks when I got older. I didn't like the thought of anyone illustrating them but me, so she helped learn."

Sebastian's eyelids drooped, his imagination granting him an unexpected vision of Lily kneeling next to Ruvik at the table, scribbling with her favorite crayons. "Your sister must have been pretty good, too."

"She was. She was brilliant at everything she did."

He finished by drawing in a pair of glasses, and suddenly the face clicked. "Wait," said Sebastian tugging the paper closer. "Wait, I know her."

Ruvik's eyebrows shot up. "You know Tatiana Gutierrez?"

"Is that her name?" Sebastian squinted at her; Ruvik was a good enough artist that the features were unmistakable, down to her blank expression. "I guess I don't _know_ her, but I've met her. She was in the STEM."

Ruvik's surprise was quickly replaced with cold suspicion. "Tatiana was inside the STEM?"

Sebastian frowned; Ruvik's expression was suddenly so full of malice that his vulnerability from a moment ago felt like a hallucination he'd had. "What's the matter? I thought you were in control of everyone who connected to the machine."

"I was." Ruvik glared at the portrait, deep in thought. "What did she do, when you saw her? Did she say anything to you?"

"She didn't really say anything worth remembering," said Sebastian. Even when he tried, he could remember the dull monotone of her voice, but almost none of the words. "A bunch of cryptic bullshit. But at the time it did feel like she was trying to help me. She was holed up in a wing of the hospital—I ended up there over and over. It was the only place I could catch a breather." Ruvik looked more displeased with every word, so Sebastian finally just asked, "Who is she?"

Ruvik steepled his fingers and leaned into them. "She's a Mobius scientist," he said. "But she worked within Beacon as a nurse. She assisted Jimenez and I with the STEM, and even participated in some of my other...personal projects. Out of everyone working for Mobius now, she has the most knowledge of how STEM functions. It's not enough to let her recreate the core, but she'll be the one trying." His eyes narrowed. "She's the one who dissected me."

Sebastian winced; Ruvik's anger was palpable, and it made his skin crawl. "Then...maybe it wasn't really _her_ , inside STEM," he suggested. "She could have been another of your 'ghosts,' right? Something your subconscious created, or whatever?"

Ruvik looked unconvinced, and he didn't answer. Sebastian waited as long as he could stand to. "Anyway," he said at last, "is there anyone else?"

For a moment it looked as if Ruvik still didn't plan on responding, but then he drew another paper toward him and started sketching again. "The only other person from Mobius I remember that's worth mentioning is Anvi Shah," he said distractedly. "She worked as my assistant, the few times I conducted research at their headquarters itself. I got the feeling she was trying to learn from me, though who can say how successful she was."

"Wait, wait." Sebastian waved at him to stop. "You've been to Mobius' headquarters?"

"Yes, a handful of times. They sometimes provided me with…." He frowned as he continued his sketch, his eyes flicking to Sebastian and back. "In any case, I don't remember the way. They were careful to transport me in vehicles without windows."

Sebastian leaned back into the sofa. He ached for a cigarette. "They'd give you people to torture, didn't they?"

"To experiment on," Ruvik corrected, though he didn't raise his eyes again. "Mobius was going to kill them anyway."

"Christ, you're so…." Sebastian rubbed his face with both hands, but in doing so he remembered echoes of blisters on his fingers, and that horrible thrill when fire swallowed his enemy whole. "Whatever. I guess it's too late to worry about that, now."

Ruvik was quiet as he finished his work. The last sketch was of an Indian woman with her hair pulled back. "I don't recognize this one," said Sebastian. "Pretty, though." He snorted. "What a fucking shame she's probably a psychopath like the rest of them."

"It's not much to go on," Ruvik admitted, folding his arms on the table as he looked over the three drawings. "The headquarters is large, with several levels above and below ground, and it's maybe an hour from Beacon. But that's about all I remember. I didn't care enough about them at the time to pay better attention." He sighed. "We may have to rely on Kidman after all."

"I told her a place we could meet up. We should go there, tonight." Sebastian scratched the back of his neck. "If she even remembers, after I…bashed her head in, shit."

"What kind of place?" asked Ruvik with sudden interest. "If it's somewhere public, you're going to have to choose something less conspicuous to wear."

Sebastian plucked at silk shirt and track pants ensemble. "You should talk," he shot back. "You're the one Mobius is really looking for, and you stand out like a sore thumb with that white hair of yours."

"It's not by choice. Though maybe dying it wouldn't be a bad idea...." Ruvik climbed to his feet. "In any case, I still want to check on your wounds," he said as he retrieved Sebastian's crutch. "And I assume you'll want to clean up some. I'll get my kit ready and meet you in the bathroom."

"Um, all right." Sebastian allowed Ruvik to help him upright and get the crutch beneath him. "If we're not planning on going anywhere until tonight, I wouldn't mind another shot of that anesthetic."

"We'll see."

Sebastian hobbled into the bathroom, and as he stood in front of the mirror, poking impishly at his swollen eye, he heard the front door open and close.

***

Ruvik stood in the hall for several minutes, leaning back against the door, trying to put his thoughts in order.

 _Tatiana was in STEM._ He folded his arms against his chest. _How did I not notice her? She couldn't have been that well-hidden, not using that fool infusion of hers. Did she slip in with Adam somehow?_ He ground his teeth. _How did I not notice her? If Sebastian's right and she's just another ghost of my own making…how many more could there be?_

Ruvik forced himself to take a step forward. _As if Leslie wasn't enough_ , he thought as he headed for the third floor. _I should have told Sebastian the full truth. He's going to find out eventually anyway._ He allowed his mind to flow outward. _I don't want to look like Leslie anymore._

By the time Ruvik returned to the apartment, Sebastian had stripped down to his boxers and was sitting on the closed toilet, carefully removing the bandage on his thigh. "There you are," he said crossly. "I was starting to worry. Where the hell did you go?"

Ruvik tossed him a small box, which he looked over with a curious frown. "Hair dye," Sebastian said, peeking inside. "Where'd you get it?"

"A woman upstairs gave it to me," Ruvik answered as he removed his hoodie. "She decided to go to a salon instead."

"Did she now?" Ruvik headed into the bedroom to fetch his surgical kit, so Sebastian called after him, "Are you sure you didn't warp her mind into handing it over?"

"Not that I'm aware." Ruvik returned along with an extra towel and washcloth from the closet. "I asked for it, and she said I needed it more than she did, and she gave it to me." He began setting out his things as Sebastian finished removing the bandages. "She doesn't remember any of that now, of course, but I didn't steal it from her." He made a face. "I didn't want to get an earful from you."

"So you at least had to read her mind to know she had it," Sebastian continued to ramble on, even as he offered up his leg to Ruvik's care. "And then erase her memory. Why are you even fucking with that after what happened last night? You're putting yourself at risk."

Ruvik was caught off guard by the direction of Sebastian's complaints, and he frowned to himself as he studied the healing gunshot wound. "Your concern is very touching," he said dryly. "But I'm fine."

"I'm being serious," he insisted. "If you wander off and pass out, how am I supposed to keep up my end of our bargain?"

"I'm not going to pass out over something so trivial." Ruvik started preparing a syringe. "There's some new swelling around the wound site," he murmured. "I'm going to give you another dose of antibiotics."

Sebastian sighed. "All you ever do is change the subject."

"While you spend too much time belaboring a point." Ruvik filled the syringe and then handed it to Sebastian to look after while he swabbed the inside of his arm with alcohol. "If I'm ever going to be able to fully control these abilities, I need to practice. I _want_ to practice. But I'll be careful, so you don't go into hysterics over it."

Sebastian tried to protest, but then Ruvik took the syringe back and jabbed it into his arm. " _Fuck_ ," he hissed as he tried not to squirm. "Come on, Ruvik, I'm trying to play ball with you, here."

"I know." Ruvik tried not to squirm himself as he injected the drugs. A little pressure kept the puncture from bleeding, and from there it was time to begin cleaning the leg wound. "Your…efforts…haven't gone unnoticed."

Ruvik tended to the wounds in Sebastian's thigh and then re-bandaged them. They had held up remarkably well given the circumstances, and were healing as well as he could have hoped. Addressing Sebastian's neck was slightly more complicated, as there was no stool for Ruvik to sit on and the edge of the tub was too far away to play the role. In the end he had to brace one knee to the toilet mount and lean over Sebastian's shoulder to reach. Ruvik didn't mind. Sebastian's body was sturdy despite the amount of pain he was in, and he found himself somewhat charmed by the sensation of a bare back against his equally bare forearms—he couldn't even remember the last time he'd felt skin against skin on more than his hands. He wouldn't have expected it to feel quite so _unique_ , and he thought nothing of the close quarters as he worked.

Sebastian, on the other hand, did seem to mind. After much grumbling he distracted himself by reading the instructions to Ruvik's boxed hair dye. "So," he muttered as Ruvik was finishing up. "Luminous, rose gold blonde."

"It's not going to make much of a difference," Ruvik said as he cleaned and packed away his tools. "But there's no other option within the building, and I'd rather not waste the money."

"This'll be fine." Sebastian began removing the box's contents. "You're so damn pale, anything darker would make you stand out even more." He hummed thoughtfully. "You used to _be_ blond, didn't you?"

Ruvik closed up his kit with a snap. "Did I?" He thought back, and realized with an unexpected chill that he didn't well remember what his own face had looked like as a child. He couldn't recall any specific memory in front of a mirror, or his mother or the servants attending to his appearance. He only remembered the oil painting in the hall, and how much the artist had made him look like his father. "Maybe I was."

"I thought you picked it on purpose," Sebastian said as he handed Ruvik two small bottles from the box. "To look more like you used to. Should I start calling you 'Ruben' now?"

"No," Ruvik said immediately. "I'd rather you didn't."

"Fair enough." He nudged Ruvik with his foot. "You're supposed to mix those."

Ruvik stared at the bottles and gave each a small shake. "You've done this before?" he asked as he uncapped them.

The lines deepened around Sebastian's mouth and eyes, and Ruvik was grateful that he'd looked up soon enough to see it; as faint as the expression was, Ruvik was so familiar with the grief beneath that it resonated easily through him. "Yeah," said Sebastian. "Yeah, with…Lily." He gestured vaguely as if it would help shake off Ruvik's stare. "She wanted to be Dora the Explorer for Halloween, but the wig was scratching her, so we tried it out. Myra wasn't so happy about it, but…."

Ruvik watched him a moment longer to see if he'd finish that thought before turning his attention to the bottles. "You don't like talking about her, do you?" he said as he mixed the contents. "Your daughter, I mean."

He could feel Sebastian glaring at him. "Do _you_ like talking about your sister?"

"I do." Ruvik put the cap back on the filled bottle and shook it. "I would tell the whole world about Laura if I could, down to the last detail I can remember." He handed it back to Sebastian. "I'd tell you to just ask Jimenez, if you could."

Sebastian glanced between Ruvik and the bottle. "Wait, am I doing this?"

"You are the one with experience," Ruvik said, dragging a towel across his shoulders. "And you have a better viewing angle than I do."

"Yeah, fine." Sebastian shifted forward on his seat and spread his feet wider. "I guess it's only fair after you took care of me."

Ruvik turned around and scooted back until he was between Sebastian's knees. It would have probably been faster and simpler to do the job himself, which he was fully confident he could do—he had performed entire operations on himself, he doubted that dying's one hair even compared—but he had a sudden, very keen interest in putting Sebastian to work. The plastic gloves supplied with the kit were almost comically small on Sebastian's hands, but he manipulated them well enough.

"Your hair's so damn short," he complained. "But I'll try not to get it all over your ears."

"I'd hope so," said Ruvik.

He flinched slightly when Sebastian touched him, even though he'd been expecting it. It had been almost thirty years since the last time he'd had hair, and it was strange at first, feeling it tug against his scalp as it was parted. He thought of all the times he'd watched Laura comb her hair before bed, and the few opportunities he'd been given to comb it for her. How he'd fretted over every tangle, fearful of hurting her. How much care she'd shown him in return.

Of course, Sebastian's hands were nothing like Laura's. They were still careful—maybe he was indulging in a familial memory of his own—but his fingers were blunt, firm in their attention. One of his nails was split, and it scratched as he worked the dye in. Ruvik couldn't compare the sensation to anything he'd felt before, which in itself fascinated him. The gentle pressure of warm fingertips where there had once been only a plastic case was startling and intriguing. He amused himself with the thought of Sebastian reaching through that clear wall to massage his brain.

"Stop squirming," Sebastian muttered. "Unless you _want_ it in your eyes."

"I can't help it," he admitted. "I haven't had hair since I was ten. Just scars and stitches."

"I'm already helping; you don't have to play the 'pity me' card anymore."

Sebastian continued on the other side, and Ruvik tilted his head slightly to make it easier for him. He even found himself leaning into Sebastian's knee, his arm warm against Sebastian's calf as strong fingers kneaded into the back of his skull. Relaxation had been almost impossible to come by at Beacon, and he was completely unfamiliar with the way his shoulders were drooping, his muscles soft and slack. He didn't know it was possible for his mind to feel so weightless but also so firmly attuned to his body, and as his eyes drifted shut he breathed a long, blissful sigh.

Sebastian paused. "Can you not do that? You're making it weird."

"Sorry," Ruvik mumbled, but he didn't straighten his posture, only tilted his head more. "Almost finished?"

"Yeah." Sebastian switched the bottle of dye to his other hand and continued. "Just hold still."

Sebastian was rougher with his right hand. His patience seemed to be wearing out and he worked faster, tugging harder at Ruvik's hair. Ruvik liked it better that way. He wanted to feel the pressure of worn fingertips digging into his skin, carving their prints against his scalp. He wanted bruises that would later remind him of how he felt in that moment, focused and alight, both prickling with energy and deeply at ease. He wanted—

"Okay," said Sebastian, leaning back. "That ought to do it."

Ruvik snorted quietly with disappointment, but he didn't linger; he climbed to his feet and looked to the mirror. "It doesn't look blond," he said.

"You have to wait half an hour and then wash it out," said Sebastian as he threw away the used supplies. "They even give you a little bottle of conditioner to use to keep it from fading right away."

"Conditioner," Ruvik echoed. "If you say so." When he finally looked away from his hair, he realized his cheeks were redder than they ought to have been, and he gave them a self-conscious rub. "I suppose I should thank you for your help."

Sebastian grunted. "Don't strain yourself or anything."

Ruvik glanced at him. Sebastian was in truly terrible shape—bruised, swollen, exhausted—but his eyes were still sharp, his hands still steady. It was remarkable and almost unnerving how tightly his willpower stitched the shorn and aching pieces together, a canvas of stubbornness and cynicism pulled over a grief Ruvik had only the night before truly come to appreciate. He could not have asked for a more fitting companion to help him meet his ends, and he wasn't above recognizing that.

Ruvik hung his towel on a nearby hook and then faced him. "You should get some more rest," he suggested. "Let me help you to the bed, and I'll give you a shot of the anesthetic."

He offered his hands, but Sebastian just stared at them. At last he shook his head. "Ruvik," he said, his voice coarse. "Listen, just...thank you. For not doing what I asked last night."

Ruvik lowered his hands. He wanted to say that it wasn't for Sebastian's sake that he'd held back, but it didn't seem worth the effort. Even directly acknowledging Sebastian's gratitude didn't feel entirely right, so he only nodded. "Do you need a minute?"

"Yeah." Sebastian rubbed his face and then took a breath. "Yeah, I'm going to try and clean up a bit more. I can make it to the bed on my own."

"All right." Ruvik scooped up his kit. "Call if you need me," he said, and he showed himself out. He could still feel the heat in his cheeks.


	8. Chapter 8

Sebastian slept through the morning. Without Ruvik's aid his dreams were sharp and restless, full of crumbling foundations and voices rising from smoke. He awoke with a feeling of weight against his chest that he rubbed away with trembling hands. He knew how dangerous it would be to let it settle.

A noise from the bathroom drew his attention, so rather than wallow in bed any longer, he investigated. He found Ruvik standing in front of the mirror, fussing with his hair. Apparently he hadn't bothered with a hair dryer, letting it set naturally into rough, gold-blond whorls, and Sebastian took some amusement from watching him comb it in various directions.

But then Ruvik wet the comb and parted his hair down the middle, smoothing it down toward his ears on either side. He turned his head back and forth and stood contemplating for a full minute. His eyes were dull and resentful. "It's not me," he said, running his hand through the part to ruin it. "Nothing feels right."

Sebastian stepped closer. "It's just hair," he said. "It's not about to trump the fact that you're wearing someone else's face." He plucked the comb out of Ruvik's hand and used it to brush his hair entirely back. "There." He smoothed a stray lock behind Ruvik's ear. "At least that makes you look older."

"If you say so." Ruvik turned to and fro again. "It'll do, for now."

 _Well, you tried._ Sebastian limped back into the bedroom. "You could try blue next time," he suggested dryly as he dug a T-shirt out of the dresser. "If you really want to blend in."

"I don't mind the blond," said Ruvik. "It's this face." He followed Sebastian and sat down on the bed. "When we're finished with Mobius, I'm going to find a proper operating room and fix it."

"Fix your face?" Sebastian scoffed as he dragged the T-shirt on. "You're just gonna do plastic surgery on yourself?"

"Why not? It can't be that difficult." He rubbed at his nose. "It's just a matter of harvesting usable cartilage, maintaining the blood supply. I've performed much more complicated surgeries."

"On _yourself,_ though?"

"Of course. You've seen the results." Ruvik tapped his forehead. "I'll admit it wasn't the most attractive work, but that wasn't my goal, at the time."

Sebastian stared at him, thinking he had misunderstood. "That big hole in your skull," he said, leaning back against the dresser. " _You_ did that? In the real world, not just the pseudo-reality that you…." He imagined Ruvik maneuvering a bone saw toward his own face and felt sick. "That's crazy."

Ruvik was unmoved. "Do you think I would trust anyone else to do such a surgery? Gutierrez was my assistant, but yes, the bulk of it I did myself."

" _Why_?" It made Sebastian's scalp itch to think about. "Just felt like…airing it out? Christ."

"I wanted access," Ruvik explained, with that twinkle in his eyes that sprang up whenever they talked about his brand of science. "Direct access for direct stimulation. I guess you could say I went through a phase."

Sebastian couldn't help but sigh. "Of course you did," he said, shaking his head. "Why does anything you say even surprise me anymore? What the hell is wrong with _me_ that I expect you to ever say something normal? You cut a hole out of your skull so you could poke at your own brain. Sure—makes perfect sense."

Ruvik watched him very carefully, but it wasn't with the irritation he usually bore. His eyes were still bright and he looked almost eager, as if Sebastian were an entirely different person worthy of study. It was unnerving. "I lost faith in the STEM, for a time," he elaborated. "It was a few years after Jimenez brought me to live at Beacon. I doubted the machine would ever grant me the depth of connection I was seeking. But I was even less willing to accept that I would be forever trapped in a scar-ridden body incapable of basic sensation."

Ruvik pinched and scratched at his jaw as he talked, drawing Sebastian's reluctant attention. "Rather than trying to see the world through another's senses, I decided to try going straight to the source," he carried on. "I believed I could bypass my imperfect body and stimulate my brain directly, giving me access to all those fascinating impulses that had been deadened in me: fear, pain, pleasure." The little twist of his lip was downright predatory. "I'm embarrassed to admit I was thoroughly obsessed for some time before even that dissatisfied me."

Curiosity was a terrible thing; it gnawed at Sebastian's brain stem as he fought viciously not to picture the scenes Ruvik was describing. And still he couldn't stop himself. "Pleasure," he repeated. "I'm scared to know what you think that word even means."

 _Why would you even say that?_ Sebastian thought almost before the words were fully out of his mouth. Watching Ruvik sit up straighter made his palms sweat. _You know better than to bait him_.

"I know what it means," said Ruvik, and the intense thoughtfulness in his tone made Sebastian's skin crawl. "Do you?"

"Just...forget I said anything, all right?" Sebastian turned around and began opening drawers in search of a pair of pants. "You can think whatever you want."

He heard Ruvik get off the bed. _Don't turn around_ , he thought, even as his ears strained for footsteps. _Don't give him anything else, or you'll never hear the end of it._

"It's like I've demonstrated for you before," Ruvik was saying. His socks made only the barest sound on the carpet as he came closer. "Sensation lives in the brain, not the body, and the human brain is a toy to me. You'd likely be amazed at the kinds of pleasure some acetylcholine and a well-placed electrode can provide."

Sebatsian felt Ruvik just behind him, and he couldn't help but think back to their brief rest in the woods, and the eerie tingle on the tip of his tongue reminding him how easily his body could be wrenched away from his control. Part of him knew he could trust Ruvik not to break his word, but his heart was loud in his ears anyway. "We're not having this conversation," he said firmly. To prove his resolve to Ruvik and himself he turned back. "I really don't care about—"

"I could show you," said Ruvik.

Sebastian stared down at the hand Ruvik was offering and his every thought screeched to a halt. "What?"

"I could show you," Ruvik said again. He was trying to sound flippant, which only made the excitement buried in his voice even worse. "I don't need any of those things now." Even his breath sounded faster than a moment ago. "All I have to do is...flip some switches, and you'll understand exactly what I mean."

"What? No." Sebastian's gaze danced between Ruvik's hand and his face as the dresser dug into the small of his back. "I don't think so."

Ruvik's smile was almost playful, which in itself was terrifying. "Don't look so panicked," he teased. "I'm not going to do anything without your permission." He licked his lips. "I just thought you might be as curious I was, to fully experience what our tender human minds are capable of."

"I don't get what you're…." Sebastian trailed off, swallowing. It didn't matter what Ruvik was really offering, because he fully understood the message beneath it: his body wasn't his. He'd let himself forget from time to time, with a blushing cheek resting on his lap, but the fact that Ruvik was asking permission didn't change anything between them. They were still playing a game, and Sebastian was still losing.

He imagined himself with his toes hanging off the edge of a subway platform, the train screaming in. And he felt that tug against the base of his ribs: that sickening urge to _jump_.

"No." Sebastian took in a deep breath. "Um, no thanks. I'm…I'm good."

Ruvik's eyes pinched with amusement. "Suit yourself," he said, lowering his hand. "You should put some pants on and come see what I've been working on while you were asleep."

He left the room, and Sebastian slumped in his wake, gripping the dresser behind him. "What the fuck was that about?" he muttered under his breath. When he was feeling a bit more stable, he returned to digging up a fresh pair of sweat pants. Though his stomach was still churning, he dressed and then rejoined Ruvik in the living room.

Ruvik had set up his laptop on the coffee table, along with a variety of tools and electronics taken from his lab. "I realized something," he said as Sebastian leaned against the wall to watch. "I don't need to recreate the entire core—I myself am as much of a core now as it ever was. As long as I can amplify my own signal, I should be able to manipulate the STEM terminal inside Mobius myself." He lifted a mess of cobbled together parts that Sebastian had no hope of identifying. "See? It's so simple."

"And here I thought you spent the whole time messing around in the bathroom," said Sebastian.

"It won't do us much good if we can't find Mobius' headquarters, of course." Ruvik set his things down and turned to the laptop. "We can compare a map of the city to what I remember about how far it is from Beacon, how large the building is, but that's a lot of ground to cover with no leads."

"Here's hoping Kidman will have something for us," said Sebastian. He kept one hand on the wall and headed into the kitchen. "I'm going to make us some lunch."

After lunch, they spent the afternoon in relative quiet. Sebastian enjoyed several hours nearly pain-free thanks to one of Ruvik's shots, as he made a list of possible buildings and properties Mobius could be hiding in. Ruvik passed the time tinkering with his electronics. He didn't make any more bizarre offers, but Sebastian tensed a little every time he took a breath to speak, cautious of whatever might come out.

"I'd be interested to let you try this as well, once it's finished," Ruvik said at one point, twisting a screw into place. He managed to sound honestly curious and condescending at once. "You've shown a great degree of compatibility with me, not to mention the control you were able to exert over Lim. You might be able to 'broadcast' a signal of your own."

"No thanks," Sebastian replied, and he flicked the television on in hopes of squashing any further conversation on that subject.

It worked; the news was on and reporting about Beacon. There was, naturally, no mention of the struggles that had taken place there the night before, but they were running an interview with Captain Remington about KCPD's increasing involvement with the case, and their frustrating lack of culprit or motive. When they began showing clips from families of the victims, Sebastian changed the channel. Ruvik didn't look up, but he did remain quiet for a while afterward.

By the time six o'clock rolled around, Sebastian's anesthetic had worn off and he was feeling restless. "Kidman may not remember the place," he said as he changed into a pair of jeans, as tasteless as he found their pre-faded knees to be. "Or she might not be able to get away from Mobius. But we have to try. If she can help us get to Joseph…."

"Agreed," said Ruvik, layering a short-sleeved shirt over a long-sleeved one. "But she's been with them, possibly for a long time. Be careful how much you trust her, Sebastian." He tugged at the hems of his sleeves. "How do I look?"

Sebastian couldn't help but snort. "Like no bar would let you through the door even if you had ID."

Ruvik smoothed his hair back as best he could. "You said this made me look older."

"Not old enough." Sebastian buckled his gun harness across his chest and pulled a windbreaker on over it. "It doesn't matter—we're not going inside anyway. It'll be safer if we scope it out from across the street." He waved for Ruvik to hand him his crutch. "You'll be able to sense Kidman if she gets close, won't you?"

"Of course," said Ruvik, surprisingly agreeable about fetching the crutch and helping Sebastian to get his balance. "If we're both on guard, hopefully this outing will go more smoothly than the last one did."

"I don't see how it could go any worse," Sebastian replied, and together they left the apartment.

***

Juli stayed away for as long as she could stand to. She sat through several debriefings, underwent a few tests for her aching skull, even allowed her brainwaves to be scanned for any hint of Ruvik's meddling, and afterward retreated to her room to rest and regroup. They were certainly watching her. She played her role as best she could, even asking about Lim's health as if concerned for her new supervisor, but as evening approached impatience got the better of her.

 _Sebastian's alive,_ she thought as she made her way to the infirmary's recovery wing. _He out there—I'm not alone in this._ She rubbed the side of her head. _Asshole didn't have to knock me out, though. What the hell was that for? Did he think I wouldn't be able to handle Ruvik?_ She thought of how she had found Lim on the floor of the lab, wide-eyed and twitching, and grimaced. _Maybe he was right, but he could have just said so, the jerk._

She reached Joseph's room and peeked through the viewing window; he was in bed, asleep and alone. _They're watching_ , she told herself as she let herself in. _Always watching. But maybe I can get a message to him, somehow. He has to know that Sebastian's still fighting for him._

Juli entered and moved swiftly to Joseph's bedside. At a glance he seemed to be wholly intact and sleeping peacefully, but his hair was mussed and smelled like sweat, and his left hand was wrapped with gauze. _Whatever they did to me, they did to him_ , she thought, touching the back of his hand. _And when he wakes up, I won't be able to tell the difference._ Her nails caught in the fabric; she wished she could dig whatever it was right out of him. _But I overcame it. He can, too. We can still get out._

She clasped Joseph's shoulder, hoping she could nudge him awake, but then she noticed something else: more than his hand had been dressed. She tugged down the sheet that was covering him and found a wide bandage taped into place over the left side of his chest.

 _What is that?_ Juli's own heart began to pound as she watched Joseph breathe slowly in and out. _What the hell did they do to him?_ _Did they put something in him?_ She put her hand to her chest, feeling through her shirt for a scar she didn't remember getting. _It's not the same as Lim's, but shit, that's more than a small incision. What the fuck is wrong with these people?_

"You don't need to look," said a voice behind her. "You don't have one of those."

It was Myra. Juli went tight, but then she forced herself to calm. She hadn't done anything suspicious or incriminating. Had she? She glanced over her shoulder and found Myra seated in a corner of the room, just next to the viewing window and purposefully invisible from the outside. Her arms were crossed and her expression, as usually, was carefully blank. _She was waiting for me_ , Juli thought as she dropped into the chair at Joseph's bedside. _She'll want to test me, like Tatiana and the Administrator did._

"Agent Hanson," said Juli, trying to look unmoved as she tucked Joseph into bed once more. "I'm sorry, I didn't see you there."

"Joseph's conditioning was more involved than most," Myra went on. She pushed to her feet and came closer, watching Joseph. "Some extra reinforcement was necessary. It's not usual, but it's not unusual, either." Her gaze slid to Juli. "We didn't carve into your chest, Agent Kidman."

That gave Juli no comfort at all. "I guess I'll have to take your word for it," she replied, but then she caught herself. "Not that it matters at this point, really. I'm Mobius, after all."

"Yes," said Myra distantly. "Yes, you are. Joseph, too, now." She tilted her head to the side. "He'll be good at it. He's clever and he's focused, but he lacks direction. He needs someone to follow. It's no wonder he and Sebastian made such good partners."

Juli watched her while trying not to look too interested. She had never heard Myra mention Sebastian's name so casually, and she wondered if news of his "resurrection" had reached her. _Or this is part of the test?_ she thought. _She's feeling me out._ "They really did," she said. "I noticed some friction between them, but they didn't let it get in the way of their work. They had the best arrest record on the force."

"Friction?" Myra repeated, confused. She sat down on the foot of the bed. "Oh, that's right. It was in your report." She watched Joseph as he continued to sleep on, oblivious to them. "The drinking."

Juli waited—hoped—to see regret in Myra's face, and thought she caught a glimpse, but she couldn't be sure. "I guess that wouldn't have been a thing while you were still with them," she said. Even if it was a test, she was hungry to learn as much as she could.

"Not really, no," Myra answered, still seemingly only half present. "They butted heads over procedure sometimes, sure. But they always got over it, and they always had each other's backs." She smiled, the expression streaking across her face like a wince of pain that quickly vanished. "I think they watched too many cop shows growing up. They both had these expectations of what it meant to be a detective, a partner. Sebastian especially. It's part of why I decided to marry him."

Juli felt heat prickling under her skin like a warning, unable to shake the feeling that she was hearing something she wasn't supposed to, and the Administrator would burst in at any moment. "I don't follow," she said. "Unless you've got a thing for cops."

Myra chuckled quietly. "It made him easy to understand," she explained. "It was like he walked out of the reruns of some old crime drama, down to the wardrobe." She looked at Juli with eyebrows raised. "I'm sure you felt the same way while you were getting to know him."

"Yeah," Juli admitted. "Like a living cliché. Though he'd switched genres by the time I met him."

"When you grow up inside Mobius, understanding normal people doesn't come naturally," Myra went on, and Juli's attention sharpened. "Just getting by at KCPD was hard enough, and worrying about being found out all the time made it worse. But Sebastian...made sense. It felt like I knew him already. He was so easy to predict and control, especially after he'd fallen in love with me. I didn't even have to lie to him that often, because he trusted me so much and never questioned. Not until…."

She trailed off, and Juli waited, breath held, for what would come next. But then Myra smiled again and lowered her eyes. "Well," she said. "You were smarter than me, Juli. Not falling in love while you were out there."

Juli made fists at her sides. Half of her wanted to grab Myra and shake her, blame her, the other half to rip her shirt open and count her scars. "I'm not sure it works that way," she found herself saying. "That's not something you choose."

"No," Myra said after some consideration. "I suppose it's not."

Juli gave Myra time to collect her thoughts—and her own—but it became clear that she wasn't about to continue. "No offense, ma'am," she prodded, "but why are you telling me this?" She decided to take the risk. "Is it because Castellanos is still alive?"

Myra didn't react at first. "Did you see him?" she asked without looking up.

"No." _Careful, Juli._ "I didn't even know he was at Beacon, at the time. But the Administrator said he was—is—still out there."

"Did you tell him about me?"

Even the thought made Juli's blood run cold. "No," she said. "I don't think I could if I wanted to." She shifted her weight. "That would make things pretty complicated for you."

"Yes, you could say that." Myra pushed off the bed and started for the door. "Come walk with me, Agent Kidman."

Juli hesitated, glancing involuntarily back at Joseph, who continued to slumber on. "Okay," she said. "But I thought—"

"Don't worry about Joseph." Myra opened the door and waited there expectantly. "He's not going anywhere."

 _Neither am I, apparently_ , Juli thought, and without much other choice, she followed Myra outside.

As soon as they were in the hallway, Myra linked arms with her, keeping her close as they walked as if they were grade school girlfriends. "Sebastian being alive makes things more complicated for you, too," she said, staring straight ahead. "You may not have known him like I did, but you worked with him for quite a while. Everyone here at Mobius has been undercover at some point, but it's different, when you're a cop. You've risked your life alongside him. It's not the same as lying to your landlord or your boss."

"It was a job," Juli protested, forcing herself to relax against Myra's arm. It reminded her of Tatiana sitting too close to her in the Administrator's office. "You've read my file—I don't have any love for cops."

"I don't need to read your file." Myra lowered her voice suddenly, to where Juli had to strain to make her out. "I know what it means to you, being here," she said. "And what it means to you that he's still out there. You don't want him in here any more than I do."

Juli watched Myra out of the corner of her eye as her pulse picked up again. _This is a test. Isn't it? Damn it, why is she so hard to read?_ "The Administrator wants him here for the STEM project," she said just as quietly.

"Sebastian won't do him any good, you and I both know that. They won't break him as easily as Joseph, and even if they do, what's left won't be usable." Myra continued to look ahead, but her arm tightened around Juli's. "You want to help him, don't you? I know it's been a long time since you felt like you were of real use to anyone. No one expects anything from a runaway mongrel like you, do they?"

The words cut deeper than Juli wanted to admit. "I don't see what that has to do with anything," she muttered.

"Now's your chance to prove that you matter," Myra said. "You can repay him for the faith he showed in you. He doesn't deserve what Mobius will do to him, and we can save him."

 _Does that mean_ I _deserve it?_ Juli wondered, unease in her stomach. _Does Joseph?_ "You're talking about going directly against the Administrator," she warned. "What makes you think I won't go to him after this and rat you out to save myself? I know how things work in here, Agent Hanson. If I betray Mobius I'll be worse than dead." She glanced around and realized Myra was steering her toward another infirmary room. "Or is it already too late for me to worry about that?"

Myra offered the faintest of smiles. "I like you, Juli. I think you have a strong future here, and I don't want to jeopardize that for you. But for now, I'm glad your conditioning hasn't held up as well as it should." Juli's heart skipped, and she started to pull back, but Myra held her tight. "It means you can help me save Sebastian."

They reached a door, and Myra finally let go so she could open it. She stepped inside without looking back. Juli stood there, glancing up and down the hall, but there was no one else milling about, and all she could see through the open doorway was the foot of a hospital bed. _She's on to me. But what can I do? Maybe she really does want to save him._

With a deep breath Juli stepped into the room. She immediately regretted it; Agent Lim was sitting up in the bed, dressed in a hospital gown. He smiled at her. "Hey, Kid."

Myra closed the door behind her, but it was the flick of the lock that drew Juli to panic. She turned, and was met with a fierce right hook to the jaw that sent her reeling. Her already aching skull rattled with fresh agony, and her thrown balance made it easy for Myra to shove her up against the bed. Lim only had one good arm but he made good use of it, grabbing her around the neck. He yanked her back hard enough that her feet almost came off the floor. She fought back at first, clawing at his ears, but another jerk of his arm halted her.

"I said I'd put a bullet in your head," he said against her hair, "but I'd settle with breaking your neck. Don't make me."

Juli stopped struggling, but she gripped Lim's arm in the hopes that he would give her an opening. That hope faded when she saw Myra pulling off her gloves. "Stay still," Mya told her as she came closer. "This won't hurt unless you fight."

"What the fuck are you doing?" Juli's heels scraped against the tile floor as she tried to get some balance, some leverage, _anything_. "Myra—"

"Shh," Lim hushed, tightening his grip until she could barely breathe. "You're wasting your time."

Myra pried Juli's left hand free and laced their fingers, digging her nails into the back of Juli's palm. "Look at me, Juli," she said, her voice as calm as still water. It made Juli's scar burn. "And tell me the truth: did you see Sebastian at Beacon?"

Lim eased up enough that Juli was able to get a full breath, but when she tried to answer _no_ , the word caught in her throat. Her lungs shuddered with the effort of pushing it out. "No," she gagged. "No, I—"

"You can't lie to me, Juli," Myra said, smoothing Juli's hair back with her free hand. "Try again. Did you see Sebastian at Beacon?"

"Yes," said Juli, the answer flying out of her like a bird from a cage. Her stomach roiled with confusion and disgust. "Yes, I saw him."

"Did you make a plan with him? To contact him, to meet?"

The words were in her mouth before she could stop them, but she clenched her teeth shut, desperate to hold them back. _This bitch was playing me all along_ , she thought as she writhed and choked. _She doesn't give a shit about me, or Sebastian, or Joseph._ Pins and needles spread through her hand, but she couldn't pull back. An answer was wailing inside her, and she didn't think she could hold it in much longer.

"You will follow orders, Agent Kidman," Myra said firmly, and a jolt shot up the length of Kidman's arm. "Tell me where to find Sebastian."

"Barley Brothers," Juli blurted out. It didn't even sound like her voice anymore. "He said to meet at Barley Brothers."

Myra let her go, and so did Lim. As they both backed away Juli's knees gave out, but she managed to catch herself against the bed before collapsing entirely. She rubbed her neck with her half-numb left hand as she drew her composure back to her. She wanted to vomit. "Wha…." She worked her jaw and grimaced. "What the fuck did you do to me?"

"Barley Brothers," Lim said thoughtfully as he gave his arm a shake. "Now that's something."

Myra drew her gloves back on. "No one who knows him would think to look for him there."

"Very true."

Juli got herself upright, and though her feet weren't as steady as she needed them to be, she was able to maneuver herself between Myra and the door. _Can I make it out of here, if I run?_ she thought desperately, planning out the route in her head. _Without a gun?_ Myra and Lim looked completely unconcerned with her, but she'd seen how quickly they could turn. _I'm fucked, aren't I?_

__

"You're not fucked," said Myra, and Juli started. "I'm not turning you in to Adam." She came closer, and Juli retreated until her back hit the door. "I know you don't trust me, and you're right not to. But I wasn't lying." Her eyes gleamed with a fire Juli hadn't seen in them before and didn't know what to make of. "What I'm doing is for him. You'll understand."

Juli stared back into Myra's face. She didn't even know where to begin translating the contradiction between her actions and her words. "I want to believe that," she said.

"Then that'll have to do for now." Myra reached toward her, and Juli stepped to the side, determined not to get blindsided again, but it was only to unlock the door. "Go back to your room and stay there until morning," she said. "Don't speak to anyone, don't go anywhere else. You'll be fine."

"What about Joseph?" Juli put her hand on the doorknob, ready to spring free if it looked like Myra—or Lim, smug bastard that he was—would change her mind. "You'll stick your neck out for your husband but not his partner?"

"There's nothing I can do for Joseph now," Myra said plainly. "And like I said, he'll do well here. He doesn't need saving."

 _Like hell he doesn't_. Juli's palm throb, and she found herself almost speaking her mind without meaning to. The hairs on the back of her neck rose and she wanted to run. "Then I'll leave Sebastian to you," she said. She glanced to Lim and back. "I'll do what you said. Let me know if…it works out."

"Goodnight," said Myra, and she turned her back. Juli got the hell out of there.

***

"Do you want me to go?" Lim asked once Juli had left the room. "I only need one hand to fire a gun."

"No," said Myra. She put her hand to Lim's shoulder, and he obediently laid down. "I don't want you anywhere near Ruvik until you've had a fresh infusion. I'll go myself."

Lim's eyebrows perked as he settled into the mattress. "I thought the point of asking me in the first place was so that you wouldn't have to."

"It was." Myra tucked him in and then stepped back, her ribs tight in her chest. "But it's not really fair of me, is it? To keep asking you to do things for me, knowing I'll hate you for them later?"

Lim smiled, and she hated him for that, too. "I don't mind."

"Get some rest. Your arm still needs to heal." Myra started to leave, but at the door Lim called her name, and she glanced back.

"Bring a big gun," said Lim.

Myra nodded and showed herself out.

***

Barley Brothers. Sebastian wouldn't have been caught dead inside among Krimson's young and trendy with their flavored craft beer, so it was a good thing he and Ruvik found a bench across the street to settle in. The night was cloudy but warm, and there were plenty of people milling about for a Monday. Sebastian stretched his legs out in front of him and puffed on his cigarette, and despite being anxious of the possibility of Juli joining them, there was something familiar and stabilizing about being on a stakeout. The city with its flickering lights and spewing exhaust was a very welcome change from the truck, the apartment, the hospital. It felt normal, and that felt damn good.

Ruvik was all poorly-concealed enthusiasm. He sat at the edge of the bench, toes together, watching the people flow up and down the streets. He put his hood up, then pushed it back down over and over indecisively, as if hoping to be seen and remain unseen at once. He even asked a few questions about the surrounding buildings and the businesses that worked out of them. It was almost charming.

But sight-seeing wasn't part of the plan. Once Ruvik had started to relax, Sebastian said, "I've been thinking about what Lim said."

Ruvik leaned back into the bench, close enough that their arms pressed together as he made himself comfortable. "I recommend you don't," he said. "But for curiosity's sake, which part?"

"About Mobius and Myra." Talking about it threatened to raise Sebastian's hackles all over again, but he took a breath off his cigarette and was able to stay focused. "He said, 'if you want to know where Mobius is, ask your wife.'"

"He said something like that, yes. What about it?"

"What if Myra really did find them?" Sebastian tried to catch Ruvik's eye, but he was still watching the men and women heading into Barley Brothers. "That has to be why they killed her—she was getting too close. There might be a clue in the notes she left me that I missed."

Ruvik hummed distractedly. "Anything you left in your home would be gone by now," he said. "Taken by Mobius."

"Yeah." Sebastian sighed, rubbing the back of his neck. "You're probably right." Then it occurred to him. "But those weren't her only notes. She was investigating a string of missing person's cases at the time." He grimaced when he remembered the cause of those disappearances, but Ruvik looked totally indifferent, so he kept going. "Those people must have all had something in common that connected them to Mobius. If she was able to catch their tail by investigating those cases, we might be able to do the same."

Ruvik didn't reply, and after a moment Sebastian grew frustrated enough to ask, "Well? What do you think?"

"Think about what?"

"About what I was just talking about." Sebastian was tempted to blow smoke in his face to get his attention, but then he felt it: a hum at the back of his brain, a subtle whine he'd grown so used to he almost didn't notice it at all. "Hey," he said. "Are you reading minds again?"

Ruvik pulled his hood back up. "Of course?"

"Hell," Sebastian muttered, "I can't take you anywhere."

"It's what I'm supposed to be doing, isn't it?" said Ruvik. "If anyone inside the bar sees Kidman, I'll know." He drew his heels up on the bench. "Besides, the people in there are very interesting."

"They're really not." Sebastian scoffed. "It would be just the thing, if you finally lost your mind to a bunch of hipsters."

"I don't know what that means," said Ruvik. "But as long as you stay close, I'll be fine."

Sebastian frowned at the shoulder pressed against his own. _Close, huh?_ he thought. It was hard not to think of Ruvik's strange behavior earlier in the afternoon. He knew better than to bring it up, he did. He did. And then he said, "If I didn't know better, I'd say you're starting to like me."

"Did I ever say I disliked you?" Ruvik replied. With his hood up Sebastian could only see a hint of his profile, but he could just imagine that little smirk of his he sometimes got. "I seem to remember claiming you as my property more than once."

"Which is still bullshit, by the way."

Ruvik rested his chin on his knees. "But I'm afraid you're not quite as interesting as the people inside that bar," he said.

He couldn't have laid more obvious bait, and Sebastian rolled his eyes. "That would really offend me if I thought you meant it. I know for a fact you don't give two shits about the 'microbes' in there."

"Maybe not," Ruvik conceded easily enough. "But they're young, and vibrant, and contradictory. I haven't been around people like this often. It amuses me."

Sebastian puffed thoughtfully on his cigarette. He was trying to think of something clever to say when Ruvik unexpectedly carried on.

"Leslie rarely trusted people," he said, and Sebastian blinked at the name, "but he still wanted to be around them. He would sit at the edge of the cafeteria and watch meal hour with his tray of chicken nuggets and peas. He liked watching them." Ruvik drummed his fingers against his knees. "I don't know what he thought he could learn from them that way. There were so wretched, so..." His fingers paused as he reconsidered whatever he was about to say and then resumed. "They held no interest for me. But they did, for him, even if he almost never engaged. I didn't understand it."

There were a lot of things Sebastian considered saying. Scorn would have been easiest. But Ruvik was talking, revealing things, and as satisfying as it had been to let him have it back at Beacon, shutting him up again wouldn't move them forward. "So," he said, his tone neutral. "Do you understand it now?"

"I don't know," Ruvik admitted. He sounded perplexed by his own answer. "Humans are weak and strange. But being among their minds, seeing the uncomplicated lives they live, feeling their connections...and not being able to act on it is very different than what I was used to." He hummed to himself. "If you weren't here to disapprove, I could pull each of them inside out in a heartbeat." Sebastian grimaced at him warily, but he continued. "But I have to admit that in forcing myself not to...I am able to learn things about them I wouldn't have considered to look for while in STEM."

Sebastian watched the outline of Ruvik's hood and wondered all over again what kind of creature Ruben Victoriano might have been in a saner world, and if Ruvik himself ever wondered the same. "Do you wish Leslie was still here?" he asked. "So you could ask him what he saw in them?"

Ruvik didn't reply. Sebastian wanted to believe it was remorse keeping him quiet. He found himself watching the people across the street just like Ruvik was, speculating on their mundane lives, amusing himself with the thought that they had no idea an angel of death was seated next to him on a curbside bench, watching them go about their Monday night rituals. He felt as if he had a monster on a leash.

The whine pitched into his ears, and he straightened up, goose bumps on his arms. "Hey," he said as Ruvik winced and scrubbed at his eyes. "You all right?"

Ruvik pushed his hoodie back down so he could rub his temples. "I'm fine," he said, though he looked strained. "I tried reading too many at once, is all."

"If you need me to slap you, I'm ready anytime," Sebastian offered. "Just say the word."

"That won't be necessary."

Sebastian frowned as he watched Ruvik pull himself back together. _He's going to keep doing that until he seizes up again_ , he thought. Thinking he might be able to collar his little monster against temptation, he gave Ruvik's knee a tap. "Hey," he said. "See that woman across the street in the blue coat? What's her story?"

Ruvik looked up. The woman in question was a Chinese woman in her mid-twenties, by Sebastian's estimation, her long hair swept up in a clip. She was engrossed in her phone as she waited outside the bar, occasionally turning in place. "Her name is Allison Wu," Ruvik said, lowering his feet to the ground. "She's texting her roommate, trying to convince her to come out for drinks even though they both have to wake up early for work tomorrow." His eyes narrowed, and the disdain creeping into them put Sebastian on edge. "She has a metal rod in her left femur from when she was hit by a car crossing the street. She thought she was going to die. And sometimes, she—"

"What's she drinking tonight?" Sebastian interrupted.

Ruvik frowned at him. "What?"

"She's dragging her friend to the bar; they're going to drink," said Sebastian. "Something expensive and foreign, probably. What does she like?"

"Mezcal," he answered carefully, as if expecting a trick.

"Figures." Sebastian took a long breath off his cigarette. "What else do you know about her?"

"She almost walked out into traffic last week. Her lover has been sending pictures to other women, and she—"

"Yeah," Sebastian cut in again, "but what music does she like?"

Ruvik glared at him. "What are you doing?"

 _What_ are _you doing?_ Sebastian asked himself. _You really think you can tame him?_ He took one last puff off his cigarette and put it out on the sidewalk under his heel. _If you can't kill him in the end, and he goes free...will anything you've said and done be enough to make a difference? He is what he is._

"I want you to say something nice about her," said Sebastian, even if he was half convinced he was out of his own mind. "But if you can't manage that, neutral will do."

"Why?"

"Because...humor me." Sebastian did his best impression of not actually giving a shit. "Come on, Ruvik, you can read her entire mind, see all her memories. You said before you want to _know_ people, right? Find something nice—I dare you."

Ruvik sighed. "You're so utterly transparent."

"Well, if you can't do it—"

"I don't care what kind of music she likes," said Ruvik. "If you want to know, ask her yourself."

Sebastian was about to scoff, but then he realized that Ruvik was offering his hand. He eyed it as one might a cobra. "This isn't like this afternoon, is it?" he asked uneasily. "I don't want you in my mind."

"This isn't about me being in your mind, it's you being in hers," Ruvik assured. "Like with Lim."

Sebastian recoiled. "We're not hurting her."

"Like Lim but with less torture," Ruvik said impatiently. "She won't even know we're there."

Sebastian hesitated, glancing between Ruvik and Allison. _This is a bad idea_ , he thought, as across the street Allison shared brief pleasantries with a couple heading into the bar. _You've given him too much already_. But he knew Ruvik wasn't about to stop spying on her or anyone else on the street even if he said no, and the intense look on his face was oddly inviting for once, like a child desperate to share his favorite toy. Maybe the timing was right to make a difference.

Sebastian scraped his sweaty palm against his pant leg and took Ruvik's hand. "She won't know we're there," he said firmly.

Ruvik twisted his wrist so he could lace their fingers together, and though Sebastian didn't care for it, he didn't fight. The sounds from the street became muddled through the ringing in his ears, and all around them shadowy ghosts began to appear: cloudy white specters just like the ones he had seen in Ruvik's mind. Allison was in each of them. In some she was as they could see her then, a flowering adult engaged with her friends, her co-workers, paying bills and dwelling on the past. In some she _was_ the past, young and immature, making mistakes and sometimes learning from them. There were so many memories vying for his attention they overlapped in places, and her voice rang like an orchestra all around him.

"How?" he stuttered, glancing from one to the next, trying to make sense of them. The youngest of them showed Allison as toddler clinging tightly to her father as he carried her against his hip, and Sebastian ached; he remembered exactly how it felt to have that weight settled in the crook of his arm. "There's so much, how do you—"

"Don't try so hard to focus," Ruvik said, his voice lower and much closer to Sebastian's ear than before. "Let it all come into you. Your mind knows what it's looking for."

Another wispy Allison appeared in front of them, striding purposefully across the street. Sebastian felt a thrill of dread even before a ghostly truck careened through the intersection and struck her. He felt echoes of her pain all through his body, splintering through his leg like a bullet, but was worse was her fear crackling up his spine. She thought she was going to die. The sensation burned in his throat and he tried to let go of Ruvik's hand. "Ruvik—"

"Ah, that's right," said Ruvik. The grisly scene vanished, along with most of the rest of the apparitions. "You wanted to ask her about music."

A five-year-old Allison danced along the curb. Sebastian burned more than ever at the sight of her fluffy dress bouncing along with her uncoordinated hopping and arm-waving. The song driving her was Stefani's _Hollaback Girl_ , to the embarrassment and delight of her parents. With her short bob of black hair swishing, her grin dazzling, she could have been a Youtube sensation. It was her first memory of music.

There were other Allisons—a parade of increasing older girls, singing along with her mother on a car ride, playing the flute in the school band, hiding from a scolding beneath her headphones. Sebastian watched her grow up to a soundtrack of familiar songs and melodies, from child to adolescent to teenager. He caught glimpses of her parents and the influence of their tastes on hers as they floated in and out of her background. They appeared less as she got older. In what was mere minutes, he lived through her ears a life his daughter should have had, until there was only Allison standing outside Krimson's trendiest bar, nodding along to the indie rock that flowed from the open door.

"It's amazing, isn't it?" said Ruvik. "The things you can see through a person's mind when you're connected this way. Her every memory, open to us. A little deeper, and we can know her better than she knows herself." His thumb drew little circles against Sebastian's knuckle. "We could even remake her, if we wanted to. Think of the intimacies you could form with a power like this."

Sebastian tried to tell him to shut the hell up, but it was hard to draw a breath when he heart was several sizes too large for his chest. He was distracted again when a man approached Allison on the sidewalk—tall and handsome and right about her age. She jumped at the sight of him, and finally her phone disappeared into her pocket as they greeted each other with a kiss.

It was one of the strangest experiences of Sebastian's already strange life. He felt the rise of her excitement and the flutter of her uncertainty as the man drew her in. He held his breath as he felt the softness of her lips from the other side, shivered with her at the strong arm tight against her back, as tight as Ruvik's hand around his. Her breasts pressed up against his chest, and—

"Stop, stop." Sebastian shook himself free and leaned over his knees, scrubbing his face with both hands. His nerves untangled from Allison's and he could breathe again. "Jesus, fuck, that's so wrong."

"What?" Ruvik was still sitting much too close for Sebastian's comfort, his tone damnably amused. "Is that unusual for couples?"

"You can't just…." Sebastian glanced up and was relieved to see Allison and her boyfriend entering the bar together. "That's supposed to be _private_ ," he tried again.

"It's not like she knew we were watching."

"That's not the point!" Sebastian growled into his hands and then straightened up, letting the night air against his cheeks cool his blush. "I feel like a fucking voyeur—I just watched that girl grow up, _Christ_."

Ruvik regarded him without one ounce of concern. "Is it strange because she reminded you of your daughter up until that part?"

"It would be strange for _anyone_ ," Sebastian insisted. He turned toward Ruvik, one arm on the back of the bench. "Don't you get it? You can't just _violate_ someone like that, it's not right. I can't believe I let you talk me into it at all—we're not doing that again. Leave the people alone."

Ruvik huffed petulantly to hide what might have been honest disappointment. "It's not like they even matter."

Sebastian thought of a little girl dancing in her poofy dress, eyes alight, and he couldn't help himself; he gave Ruvik the sharp smack upside the head he'd been saving for days. Ruvik jolted as if he'd taken a bolt to the brain, and he covered the back of his head with hands as he glared at Sebastian in angry disbelief. "Don't."

"What, you don't like that?" Sebastian taunted. "Did I violate your personal boundaries?"

"You're so grossly naïve," said Ruvik. "These people are nothing to me _or_ you. Who cares if—"

He started to lower his hands, so Sebastian gave him a hard flick that had him covering up again. "I said _don't_ ," Ruvik demanded, but when Sebastian moved his hand again in a bluff, the irritation in his face turned to something more fragile. "Don't touch me."

"Don't touch _them_ ," Sebastian retorted. "And don't you ever tell me they don't matter. They're people, not playthings, and you don't own them."

"You were the one that pointed her out." Ruvik waited until Sebastian's hand was dangling off the back of the bench to let his guard down, and even then he pulled his hood up like armor. "Hypocrite," he grumbled. "I know there's nothing you wouldn't give to have had this power when your wife was leaving you."

Sebastian was sorely tempted to smack him again, and he came close. But he had to admit, there was something fascinating and disturbingly intimate to have seen another person's entire life flash by from their own perspective. In such a short time he knew more about the history of some stranger than the woman he'd made a family with. He _would_ have given anything to see through her eyes as she walked out the door. He tried to push the thoughts out of his mind; it did no good to speculate on answers he'd never have.

"Look," he said, certain he was wasting his time and not caring. "I can see why you get off on all this. But you don't have to put them _or_ yourself in danger with this crap. You've got a body now, you know. If you want to know what something feels like, you can do it—if you want to know more about someone, you can _ask them_. Like a normal fucking human being. Isn't that what you wanted?"

Ruvik was quiet for a long time. His shoulders were tense at first, but gradually they lowered, and at last he leaned into Sebastian's side. He settled in as if he belonged there and Sebastian was too bewildered to push him off.

"I think," Ruvik said, "you're finally starting to like me."

"You're so wrong it's not even funny," Sebastian muttered, but he kept still until Ruvik was comfortable, and then shifted just enough that his good leg wouldn't fall asleep. There didn't seem to be any point in doing otherwise. He couldn't feel the whine anymore, and that much at least put him a bit more at ease. So he turned his attention to the bar, trying not to wonder what music Lily might have listened to, waiting outside on a Monday night for her boyfriend.

***

Spotting Sebastian wasn't difficult. Myra knew that he wouldn't be inside, not in such a cramped space with too few exits and too many strangers. If it had been her, she would have put herself across the street, with only a narrow side-street behind that led to a public parking lot. And that's where she found him.

She had hoped not to find Ruvik with him. But as she picked a spot in the parking lot and rolled the windows down, she noticed the hooded figure next to Sebastian that could have only been him. He complicated things.

Still, Myra wasted no time. She unbuckled herself and opened up the silver case on the passenger seat. She assembled the rifle. Per Lim's advice she had picked one with long barrel and silencer; once it was loaded and the safety off she had to lean back, shoulders to the door and gun braced against her knee, in order to sight a proper shot. It had been a long time since she'd handled a proper firearm, and the stock dug into her shoulder as she set her sights on the two men.

They were sitting awfully close together; Sebastian had always struck and impressive figure even on his worst days, the span of his shoulders making him look almost like a bodyguard for his smaller comrade. It didn't surprise her that Ruvik had found a way to control him and it assured her more than ever that the bullets in the magazine were the only choice.

 _One for each of them,_ Myra thought, focusing on the back of Sebastian's head. _If I kill him first, he'll never even know what happened._ She traced the trigger with her fingertip. _Ruvik will have a moment to retaliate. He can't hurt me._ Her aim drifted to the hood, and she tried to guess from the shape of it how Ruvik's head was positioned. She wondered if she had any hope of shooting him through the neck and salvaging his brain. Even if they dared not risk him as STEM's core again, he was still of value.

But if she killed Ruvik first, Sebastian would turn. He would have a moment of clarity, to see his death approaching, maybe even register betrayal. They were too far apart for it to even be possible he'd know who killed him, but as Myra watched him take a breath off his cigarette, her aim snapped once again to the back of his head.

 _I can do it_ , Myra told herself, inching her finger around the trigger. She took a deep breath and held it, but though her hands were steady, her heart was thundering against her ribs. _I can spare him._ She bit her bottom lip hard. _It's better this way._

And then Sebastian turned.

It wasn't by much; just enough that Myra could see the familiar angles of his profile, a brief flash of his eyes in her direction. Without knowing if he'd seen her or not she ducked into her seat. Her lungs burned but she couldn't bring herself to breathe, not if there was a chance it would give her away. She locked eyes on the open window, expecting that at any moment Sebastian would be there, gazing down on her. Her fingers cramped around the gun, all thoughts of mercy out of her head in favor of cold panic. She couldn't bear to have him see her.

When Myra's vision started to swim, she finally allowed herself to exhale. With her finger yet on the trigger she pushed herself up and looked through the window; Sebastian and Ruvik were still on the bench, the former looking back and forth. He was alert and looking for a threat he shouldn't have known was even there. Despite herself, Myra smiled. "You big fool," she murmured. "Are you not finished yet?"

Myra wasn't one to question fate. The quiver in her hands convinced her she wasn't in any state to properly aim anyway. She raised the windows and stowed the rifle as quickly as she could. _I already spared him once,_ she thought as she drove away. _This time, it's up to him to save himself._

***

Ruvik was drawing deeper into his hoodie, reluctantly contemplating their recent conversation, when he realized that Sebastian was craning his neck to look behind them. He allowed his mind to drift outward once more, but an unexpected smell of smoking coals drive it back again. He had no choice but to ask, "What is it?"

"I don't know, for a second I thought...." Sebastian's brow furrowed, but after another moment of searching he gave up. "Never mind. I guess it was nothing."

It was after midnight when they finally gave up on waiting for Juli and returned to the apartment. "Looks like we don't have a choice but to try at the precinct," Sebastian said as he tossed his windbreaker and gun harness onto the kitchen table. "Most of Myra's open cases went to Detective Arcott after she went missing. It might not be easy getting any information out of her—she never liked me much."

"She doesn't have to know we're there," Ruvik suggested as he peeled his hoodie off. "Unless you're against me using my abilities to actually help us accomplish our goal."

"Don't be a brat—you know what I have a problem with." Sebastian depended heavily on his crutch as he shoved his boots off. "Sneaking us into KCPD isn't the same as spying on civilians for fun." Once finished, he considered the sofa for a moment. "Hey. You know, I don't mind taking the couch tonight, if you want the bed to yourself."

Ruvik tried not to frown as he folded his hoodie over his arm. "You're the one that's injured," he said. "It makes more sense for you to take it."

"I'm just as used to sleeping on a couch," Sebastian said with a dry turn of his lip. "And you couldn't have been comfortable last night, all scrunched up as you were."

Ruvik blushed, turning away before Sebastian could see it. "I was fine," he said, slipping out of his shoes. "Take the bed."

Sebastian didn't answer; he was waiting for Ruvik to look back, and eventually there was no choice but to do so. Once he had Ruvik's attention, he said, "If I take the bed you're just going to sneak in with me when I'm asleep, like before. Right?"

Ruvik held very still; fidgeting would have shattered his dignity. "You ought to be grateful," he replied smartly. "You sleep better with my help, don't you?"

"Well...yeah." Sebastian ran his hand through his hair. "It's just, you've been a little weird today." When Ruvik lifted an eyebrow, he added, "Weirder than usual."

Ruvik dropped the hoodie to the floor and came closer. Sebastian eyed him the whole way, and Ruvik had to admit, the way Sebastian's body grew taut with instinctual defense intrigued him greatly. "Weird how?"

Sebastian was pretty good at hiding a squirm himself, but he did gulp. "I don't know," he admitted. "I thought I was starting to get a handle on what you want from me, but when you make that face…." His eyes narrowed. "Makes me think I should be worried about whatever you're really thinking."

Ruvik wasn't entirely sure what he wanted from Sebastian, either, but he liked the face Sebastian was making at _him_. He liked the tense uncertainty between them that made it feel as if anything could happen: something he could instigate and not control, something _new_. It reminded him of the thrill of discovery that made so many years of agonizing research worthwhile.

 _If you want to know what something feels like, you can do it_ , he thought, and he offered his hand. "You don't have to worry," he said. "You can just ask."

Sebastian didn't even look at it. "I've had enough of that for one day."

Ruvik lowered his hand again, but he wasn't entirely deterred. "Sleep on the couch, if you want," he said. "But it's easier for me to help you sleep if I'm nearby, and…." He hesitated; he knew he could convince Sebastian, but he hated to do it when it meant being so honest. "And it'll be easier for me to sleep, if you're near me. I feel safer with you."

Sebastian pursed his lips, watching Ruvik closely as if trying to catch a bluff. When he didn't, he gave his eyes a rub and finally nodded. "Okay. Fine. We'll share the bed." He limped in that direction. "But you're staying on your side, understand?"

"Of course."

They took turns in the bathroom, shed pants and socks. Sebastian made as little eye contact as possible as they climbed into bed. "You don't think they killed Kidman after all, do you?" he asked as he stretched out on his back. "She's resourceful. She could have talked her way out of trouble."

"We won't know until we find them." Ruvik scooted closer, propped up on his elbow. "Rest up, Sebastian. Tomorrow is another busy day."

Sebastian frowned up at him, and looked ready to say a few different things before settling with, "Goodnight."

"Goodnight." Ruvik covered Sebastian's eyes and he was quickly asleep. His breath deepened, his body relaxed into the mattress. Ruvik drew the blankets over him but he didn't back away afterward, choosing instead to...observe a while.

He had thought himself above it. For years flesh and blood had only served as specimens for him, crude packaging that needed to be stripped away without contemplation. Later, he had relearned basic tactile sensation through the nerve endings of strangers. But he had taken very little interest or pleasure in the simplicity of two bodies slotted close together, sharing warmth. He had sought the extremes of pain, allowing agony to keep close the rage that motivated him. But coarse hair twisted between his fingers was something new. Whiskers scraping the backs of his knuckles was unprecedented. Gingerly he traced the contours of Sebastian's sleeping face, thumbing the slope of his nose and hairs rising with the breath against his palm.

They weren't the stolen prizes from someone else's memories; they were _his_ sensations, _his_ tickling nerves and rising pulse. And Sebastian slept on.

 _He asked me to help him sleep_ , Ruvik thought as he lowered himself and wriggled closer still. _And he will. It doesn't count as betraying my word._

When he was a young boy, he had crept often into his sister's room and beneath her covers. She had welcomed him, hugged him tight and kept him protected. Most days he couldn't remember what words she had whispered to him in the early morning hours when their father circled the halls, but they were treasures meant only for him. The smell of her hair and the soft satin of her nightgown formed his entire concept of home. It was his last true memory of ever feeling safe.

Ruvik burrowed into his unconscious companion; he wanted to feel safe again. A second urge he couldn't quite identify turned his stomach and shuddered in his lungs. He pressed his face into the crook of Sebastian's shoulder and breathed in his sweat as if that would satisfy the hunger, but it only made him want more. He followed the lines of Sebastian's muscles and tendons down from his shoulder to his biceps, squeezing occasionally as the names of each muddled about in his brain. Feeling the fibers flex beneath his touch gave him goose bumps. The point of Sebastian's elbow was rough and dry, the inside smooth and soft. Down and down he groped until he'd reached Sebastian's hand, where he explored every broad, calloused inch. He circled each finger in turn, stroked the dips between them, scratched the edges of his nails. He stretched two fingers against the inside of his Sebastian's palm and rubbed them back and forth, imagining himself as a weapon in his arsenal to be brandished.

Sebastian was too soundly unconscious to respond, but his hand did tighten reflexively against the stimulus, and Ruvik was startled by the adrenaline that coursed his blood when five strong fingers circled his. Up and down he stroked along the deep-set lines of Sebastian's palm, the friction warming him far more effectively than made sense to him. Without stopping he nudged Sebastian's leg with his own as well, his toes curling at the rough hair against his skin.

 _Is this what it should feel like?_ Ruvik wondered. He tilted is chin up so he could shove his nose into the curve just below Sebastian's ear; the taste of smoke was on his tongue, and without thinking he parted his lips. _Is this desire?_ His flesh buzzed with energy he'd never experienced before. Pleasure, he knew. A bit of fuel in his brain had, for many an ill-advised experiment, given him raw and unfocused ecstasy the likes of which he was sure most human beings didn't know existed, but it had always been such a fleeting, unfocused thing. He had never stoked pleasure the way it was meant to be, with touch and heat and skin on skin. It had seemed so overrated at the time, so primitive. He had shunned it, like so many things he was incapable of having anyway.

Sebastian sighed quietly in his sleep, and the way his body shifted, the way his hand and gripped tightly for a moment and then relaxed, drew from Ruvik a murmur of arousal he didn't know was in him. It excited him beyond measure. Like a shameless animal he rubbed up against Sebastian, until he became aware of the steady pressure growing between his legs. _So that's what that feels like_ , he thought, breathless and obscenely pleased with himself. He let go of Sebastian's hand for a moment so he could feel out the growing length of his erection through his boxers. Like so much of his previous body, deep burns and nerve damage had long prevented him from proper function, but finally, _finally_ , he was whole. He licked his lips, unintentionally tonguing the curve of Sebastian's jaw in the process, and gave himself a firm squeeze.

Ruvik's cock swelled in his hand, and he moaned aloud, startled by how much more sensitive he was; not just his groin, but every part of him was suddenly attuned. He reached down the front of his underwear so he could explore and caress, pulse hard and breath catching with every slide and experimental tug. His thoughts blurred with pride and need, and before he could stop himself, he was snatching up Sebastian's hand again, dragging it between his legs.

Everything was new, and he wanted to share it. He wanted Sebastian's rough grip in his hair again, pulling and scratching. He wanted bare skin under his forearms, a strong arm around his shoulders. He wanted to crawl up inside the man and unravel into his bloodstream. But for the moment he would settle for hard knuckles to rub his cock against, using them to test which parts were most receptive. Shivering and panting, he took control of Sebastian's nerves by instinct alone, forcing the sleeping limb to cup and fondle. Heat struck all through him, and within seconds was nearly unbearable.

 _No, stop_. Ruvik took in a huge breath and held it as he pushed Sebastian's hand away. He scooted back and let the coolness of the neglected sheets soothe his burning cheeks. _If you orgasm_ , his rational mind chided him, _you'll go soft._

So he closed his eyes and paced his breathing to match Sebastian's until the pressure subsided. When he relaxed too deeply and his erection began to go limp, he quickly reached down again, stroking it back to fullness. He marveled at the weight of it that drew his attention so resoundingly no matter how he positioned himself. It wasn't quite like he had suspected and speculated, and he had no intention of losing it so soon.

Over and over, Ruvik meditated until his arousal had calmed, only to stir it to fresh life. He squeezed along the shaft, pinched and fingered the head; he tried to measure his own reactions but his scientists' brain failed to keep up. With every climax denied he grew more ragged, his control harder to maintain. He managed to keep himself from commandeering Sebastian again but he stayed close, sometimes shoulder to shoulder, sometimes gasping against his throat, letting fantasy spur him. Sebastian of all people would understand what this gained experience meant to him. He must—he was all Ruvik had.

Finally, Ruvik was too exhausted to continue. Still hard with unresolved passion and all but quaking with restraint, he curled up next to the oblivious Sebastian and held himself still. It wasn't easy, but it was worth it. His body burned with frustration and need; he wanted to cling to them for as long as he could, carve them into his sinews. He didn't want to ever forget how he felt then, weak and eager and alive. He fit himself beneath Sebastian's arm and savored each beat of his heart as it echoed down through every part of him. And at last, shivering and content, he slept.


	9. Chapter 9

Meanwhile, Sebastian dreamed.

He dreamed of the night he asked Myra to marry him. It wasn't the most creative affair: a nice dinner out, a private walk down the pier, a ring. She smiled and said yes as if she'd been expecting it. He'd always been an open book to her.

When they got back to his place, Officer Draper had broken in, inviting their friends and coworkers to celebrate, which made for a small but very lively gathering. Sebastian learned later that a surveillance van had been employed to make sure they could clear out in time in case Myra said no. How Draper had figured out the proposal was happening at all, she never said. But she did handcuff the happy couple together for the rest of the night.

Someone dragged new transfer Joseph Oda along for the party. They shook hands for the first time on the best night of Sebastian's life.

And when everyone finally cleared the hell out, Sebastian tumbled into bed with his fiancé, still handcuffed together. She climbed on top of him, lacing her fingers with his as she kissed him with more passion than he though she had in her. She hiked her skirt up and he arched his back, eager to be inside her.

"I should get you drunk more often," he teased.

He tried to reach for her ass, but she pinned his hands above his head. He could hear metal clinking, and when Myra leaned back, her wrists were free, but his were cuffed to the bed. At first he laughed, but when she began unbuttoning his shirt, he squirmed. "Hey, come on." He bucked with his hips to entice her. "Let me touch you."

"Shh," Myra soothed, and she ripped the rest of his shirt open. "Just stay still. I'll take care of you."

She bent down and kissed him, and as Sebastian strained to kiss her back, he started to think the cuffs weren't so bad after all. _I've got all the rest of our lives to touch her_ , he thought happily. Then something cold and sharp jabbed him in the chest.

" _Ow_." Sebastian turned his head away. "What the hell..."

She pulled back again, except she wasn't Myra anymore: Tatiana was looming over him, settling her glasses into place. There was a syringe in her hand. "Just stay still," she said. "It'll be over soon."

"The fuck?" Sebastian tried to pull against the handcuffs, but they weren't handcuffs anymore, either: they were leather shackles pinning him to a table. His dressers and lamps were doctors in scrubs, his wallpaper was the cold, sterile walls of a lab. When he tried to struggle, his limbs wouldn't listen, lying heavy and dead against the metal beneath him. But they weren't numb. If anything, his skin was more sensitive than ever, prickling with heat as if he could feel every breath from the strangers in the room.

Tatiana disappeared from his lap only to reappear at his bedside. Neither her face nor voice held any recognizably human emotion as she said, "Let's begin the operation."

Another woman stepped forward and plunged a scalpel into Sebastian's chest. He felt his muscles fly apart beneath the blade, agony streaking through him, but he was paralyzed. He couldn't move or speak as she carved into him. Tatiana joined in, and together they opened his chest, dug their glove-clad fingers into the wounds and _pulled_.

 _Ruvik?_ His eyes bulged as he stared into every dark corner of the lab, desperate for a glimpse of a familiar face or even a whine in his ears. There were hands yanking at his ribs and he couldn't scream. _Ruvik!_

Sebastian woke up with a shudder, cold sweat on his forehead. Someone was tucked under his arm, hugging him tight around the chest, and he thought it might have been Myra until the ache in his leg brought him back up to speed. It was disorienting more than anything, and he kept still, catching his breath as the apartment came into focus around him and his bedmate. The clock on the nightstand glowed 4:07. Then he realized that Ruvik was shaking.

"Hey." Sebastian tried to urge Ruvik back, but he was clinging too strongly to allow it. "Hey, Ruvik." He worked his fingers into the base of Ruvik's skull, tugging on his hair. "Wake _up_."

Ruvik sucked in a sharp breath. The tension unwound from his limbs and he drew his arm back as Sebastian let go of his hair. "Damn, Ruvik," Sebastian muttered around a sigh. "You're supposed to be helping us sleep, not giving us nightmares."

He expected Ruvik to put some much needed space between them, as had been his habit when caught waking up in compromising proximity. But then Ruvik squirmed higher up the bed and wrapped his arms around Sebastian's neck, hugging him close again.

"Sorry," he mumbled into Sebastian's temple. "It wasn't intentional."

Sebastian blinked into the dark. _The fuck is this now?_ he thought, dazed, as Ruvik settled in with finality. He grabbed the back of Ruvik's shirt, intending to pull him off, but then...he couldn't remember the last time someone had been at his side, comforting him after a bad dream. Was it really Ruvik, of all people, welcoming him with tenderness? He relaxed just to see if Ruvik would reveal some ulterior motive, but there was only steady breath on his ear.

 _Maybe it's the other way around,_ he thought. His heart was still pounding, and he closed his eyes, allowing Ruvik to stay close as he tried to calm himself down. _That wasn't just a nightmare, that was one of his memories. They really cut him open while he was awake for it._ The thought made his chest feel tight, and he took in a deep breath, trying to expel the sensation of biting scalpels. _Served him right, but still...no one should have to live with a memory like that._

Then Ruvik slid his hand down to Sebastian's chest, and the tension changed. He drew little shapes into Sebastian's T-shirt and nuzzled the curve of his jaw. Sebastian kept still even as his pulse sped back up. Dealing with Ruvik was already enough of a challenge without curious fingertips tracing out his ribs, and he had no idea how to react. Anyone else and it might have been a welcome reprieve. Even with the memory of his wife so close, the guilt not far behind, he had to admit how much he'd missed the skim of nails and gentle sighs on his neck. But it was _Ruvik_ squirming up against him, nosing his cheek, maybe even working himself up to something more. He honestly didn't know if throwing him off or letting him explore was more dangerous.

 _You already sold him your damn soul,_ he thought, eyes still closed as Ruvik propped himself up on his elbow. _You're going to let him have this, too?_ He took in a breath and tasted Ruvik's, not sure what he would say but knowing he had to say _something_. Then Ruvik shifted, making obvious the damp spot already in his boxers.

 _Jesus Christ._ Sebastian opened his eyes and grabbed Ruvik's shoulder to keep him from getting any closer. "What the hell are you doing?"

Ruvik paused, and again Sebastian expected a retreat, but then he leaned harder into Sebastian's hand. "Stay still for a moment," he said quietly. "I want to know what it feels like."

There was so little distance to cross. Sebastian had no time to protest—Ruvik's lips were already on his. It wasn't like any kiss he would have expected from Ruvik: slow and curious, a little clumsy, but still so full of energy, as any first ought to be. He hadn't been kissed like that in ages, and he caught himself holding his breath, just as Ruvik was holding his. It wasn't fair, that a creature like him could offer something so tempting. But then five fingers tightened possessively over Sebastian's fluttering heart, and warning bells echoed through his ears.

Sebastian shoved hard at Ruvik's shoulder, throwing his weight forward to roll them both over. On hands and knees his pinned Ruvik's back to the mattress to keep him at a safe arm's length. "I'm not your test subject," he growled.

Ruvik surrendered too easily. He sank into the bed without a fight, and Sebastian made the mistake of looking at his face. His lips were parted, cheeks flushed, but the real danger was his eyes, piercing and intense in the dark of the bedroom. He stared up at Sebastian with a fierce, calculated arousal that didn't belong on such a youthfully handsome face. The dart of his tongue over his lips made it so much worse, putting butterflies in Sebastian's gut as if he were a teenager.

"I could be _yours_ ," he offered.

Sebastian froze. _That doesn't even make sense_ , he wanted to say, but Ruvik's hands were creeping up his biceps, squeezing the muscles with tender worship. Ruvik's knees were nudging the insides of his thighs—every inch of his body was warm and enticing, and Sebastian's quivered with restraint. It had been so damn long since anyone had looked at him like that, not just with intention but desire, and it made his elbows weak. Before he knew it, Ruvik's fingers were lacing behind his neck, and he was sitting up into another kiss.

He couldn't allow it, not on those terms. He grabbed a fistful of Ruvik's hair and pulled, pinning him again to the mattress. Ruvik gasped, and the flash of startled vulnerability in his face did Sebastian in. He chased Ruvik down, capturing his mouth in a heavy, biting kiss. Days of frustration and even hate rumbled through his chest as he smothered Ruvik beneath the broader span of his body. Ruvik crumpled helplessly, completely unprepared for grinding stubble and a tongue down his throat. Sebastian was disgusted with the excitement he took from the smug son of a bitch wilting beneath him.

Ruvik's weakness didn't last long. He clutched at Sebastian's shoulders, digging in with his nails. His kiss was just as vicious as he moaned and whined around Sebastian's tongue. The raw inexperience of his passion drove Sebastian half mad. They twisted together, gnawing at each other like starved animals. When Ruvik managed to drag his legs out from under Sebastian's, he dug his heels into the mattress and arched his back. His entire body seemed to lift off the bed, rising to meet Sebastian's with urgent hunger, and fucking hell did that feel good.

Sebastian forced himself to let go before he could be drawn in further, giving Ruvik one last shove as he untangled himself and rose up on his knees. His breath came fast, his pulse even faster, but the night air against his flushed cheeks helped him regain some sanity. "Well?" he asked. He scraped the back of his palm across his mouth. "Is that what you were curious about?"

Ruvik gazed up at him through his lashes. He was so pale and his limbs so blissfully lax he could have melted right into the sheets. " _Yes_ ," he panted.

Sebastian gulped. "Good," he said. "Now you know what it feels like." And without another glance he stumbled off the bed and into the bathroom, shutting the door behind him.

 _Why the hell did you do that?_ Sebastian berated himself as he leaned over the sink, splashing cold water on his face. _Is this any time to be thinking with your dick?_ He squeezed his eyes shut, trying to think of _anything_ else, until the adrenaline in his blood thinned out. After a piss he didn't feel like hiding in the bathroom anymore, but he could hear the sheets rustling in the bedroom, and he had no intention of finding out what Ruvik was up to. So he retreated instead to the living room, dropping onto the sofa.

 _This isn't over,_ he thought as he wedged himself as deeply into the cushions as he could manage. _He's not going to let it go after that._ But he was exhausted enough that he managed to fall asleep again, and thankfully, he didn't dream.

When Sebastian woke up five hours later, it was to the quiet sounds of scraping metal. His heart skipped, and he peeked cautiously over his shoulder to find Ruvik sitting on the floor at the coffee table, tinkering with his machines. He was dressed and showered, and he hummed a slow melody as he twisted a screw into place.

Sebastian rolled onto his back and watched. He had no idea what to expect. "Hey."

Ruvik looked up. "Good morning." He didn't smile, but there was a gleam of cat-like amusement in his eyes as he turned toward Sebastian. "Look what I found," he said, holding up a pair of expensive-looking headphones. He had cracked the casings open and replaced the speakers with his hand-crafted mechanisms. "I had to improvise a stronger power source, but they're the right size to house the transmitter. And less conspicuous, no?"

"Martin's not going to be happy you ruined his Beats," Sebastian said, still on edge.

"Then we can replace them for him, along with the tequila you drank." That time Ruvik did offer a faint smirk as he replaced the headphones on the table. "I can have it finished before we go to the station today, if you still think that's our best next course of action."

"Yeah, but...." Sebastian was so focused on gauging the distance between them that he almost missed what Ruvik was really saying. "It's almost finished? Already?"

"Of course," Ruvik said as if it should have been obvious, tapping on his laptop. "I already told you, it's not as complicated as creating a whole new core. The wireless transmitter was the simplest modification I made to STEM. How else would Jimenez have been able to implement it without me?" He scoffed. "That old fool couldn't have constructed even an EKG with step by step instructions."

Sebastian's brow furrowed. "Uh, yeah. Pathetic."

Ruvik stopped what he was doing and put his hand on the sofa. Sebastian tensed all over, hating that underneath his very well-advised caution was a tug of anticipation that was too curious to know if Ruvik would try again. But he didn't; he used the cushion as leverage to push to his feet, though for a moment when their eyes met, the heat in his expression was nearly as effective as any invitation he'd offered in the bedroom.

"I'll get us some breakfast," Ruvik said. When he reached the kitchen he glanced back thoughtfully before continuing on.

 _Well, Castellanos?_ _What are you going to do now?_ Sebastian kneaded his palms into his eyes and groaned. _The devil has a crush on you._

Breakfast was oatmeal again, this time with canned peaches. Ruvik gulped his down quickly as he continued to work on his transmitter, while Sebastian took his time. He was eager for any distraction or excuse not to converse, but of course, Ruvik had other plans.

"Can I ask you some questions?" Ruvik asked as he snapped the casings back into place.

"Not if they have to do with what went on in the bedroom," Sebastian replied without looking up from his oatmeal.

"Have you had a lot of sex?"

Sebastian looked up; he couldn't help it. Ruvik had plugged the headphones into his laptop and was rapidly typing out code. He only met Sebastian's startled gaze when he took too long to answer. Sebastian scraped what remained of the oatmeal around and around the bowl. "Define 'a lot'," he said.

"I can't," Ruvik said, continuing to type. "I don't have a frame of reference. That's why I'm asking."

 _This is not happening_. Sebastian forced himself to gulp down another mouthful. "Yeah, I've had plenty."

"With men and women?"

Sebastian eyed the laptop screen to make sure Ruvik wasn't actually documenting his answers. It was all jibberish to him. "Sure. Why?"

"When was the last time?" Ruvik pressed. "I assume you were with your wife, but—"

"Why are we talking about this?" Sebastian put his bowl down on the floor. "I really doubt this has anything to do with Mobius."

Ruvik finally stopped typing and faced him. "I'm just curious," he said, and though he seemed honest at first, he couldn't stop the sarcasm from creeping in. "You said if I wanted to know something, I should ask. That's what 'normal people' do."

 _Cheeky shit._ "We don't have time for curiosity now; we're supposed to be thinking of a plan to get into the precinct without everyone seeing us."

"That part's easy." Ruvik nudged the headphones. "Give me one more hour, and it'll be ready for testing."

That wasn't a very comforting prospect, either, but Sebastian still hadn't thought of any better course of action to help them fight Mobius. At least a pair of headphones would be a lot easier for him to smash than a lighthouse keep, if it came to that. "All right," he said, dragging himself upright. "In that case, I'm going to clean up and get dressed. Keep at it."

Ruvik handed him their dishes and then turned his attention back to the laptop. "Of course."

Sebastian carried the dishes to the sink. Though his limp was still pronounced, he was grateful that he could handle that much on his own. But as he left the kitchen, he found himself stopping to look at Ruvik again. He watched knobby fingers working with trained precision over the electronics, pale eyes deeply focused, full lower lip pinched hard between teeth, and an indestructible thought seized him: _You could have sex with him_.

It was insane, of course. There were a million reasons why it was the worst idea he could have had. He didn't even _want_ to. But for the first time in months a real opportunity was in front of him, and good sense be damned, no part of him was about to forget that. It certainly didn't help that his imagination was more than willing to supply him with all manner of speculation of what Ruvik was capable of intimately.

Ruvik looked up, and Sebastian hurried on before their eyes could meet. It was time for a very cold sponge bath.

***

Juli stayed in her room all night like Myra told her. She didn't get much sleep, and what she did was plagued by nightmares. By morning she was a wreck, and she donned her workout clothes for a long jog down her usual path though the facility. She wanted to sprint, to have her weary knees carry her far away from the techs and security guards that greeted her with empty smiles. She wanted to break Myra's door down and demand answers, or maybe throw Joseph over her shoulder and leap out a window to safety. Instead she found herself in the cafeteria.

Everything was already on tab, so Juli filled her plate with proteins and sat in the center of the room, gulping her breakfast down. She wanted everyone to see her. Maybe they'd think she was especially dedicated to avenging her new superior's honor, or maybe they'd see through her and see a rat desperate to escape the maze—she didn't care. She just wanted them to know she was still there, still fighting, and a force to be reckoned with.

It was when only two strips of bacon were left that Juli received company; Dennis Green slid into the chair across from her. He was wearing a paisley tie. "Morning, Juli," he greeted brightly. "Right back at it, huh?"

"Of course. I want to be ready for when Agent Lim is able to be out in the field again." The overly-friendly look Dennis was fixing her with gave her the creeps, so she offered him a piece of bacon in the hopes of turning his attention elsewhere.

"Thanks." He nibbled it happily. "Actually, you're going to get your chance sooner than that. Dr. Gutierrez asked to borrow you for a field trip today. You and I are going to be riding together."

 _Swell_. Juli tried not to let any apprehension show. _Field trip. Can't they ever just call it what it is?_ "Back to Beacon?"

"I don't think so," said Dennis. "Apparently we're going to be backup for Oda." Juli sat up straighter as he continued. "It's his maiden voyage, after all. Normally they don't let new recruits out so early, but they're really pulling out all the stops to try and get Ruvik in here as soon as possible." He finished the bacon and licked his fingers clean. "Can you be ready to go in half an hour?"

"Sooner," Juli replied. She shoved the remaining bacon in her mouth and collected her tray. _Joseph and I, in the field,_ she thought as she threw out her trash and walked with Dennis to the exit. _Then he's awake, at least. And whatever they did to him couldn't be that severe, if he's up and about already. This might be my chance to actually talk to him._ She bit her lip. _Here's hoping Myra won't be with us._

***

As promised, Ruvik was ready within an hour. He slung the headphones around his neck, very pleased with how inconspicuous it was. Even with a few extra wires poking from one side no one would suspect the power his invention wielded; with his hood up, they might not see it at all. Everything he had worked for was suddenly within his grasp, and he was all but giddy with excitement as he and Sebastian piled into truck and drove up town.

"I want to test it before we go in," Ruvik said once they were three blocks away from the police station. He couldn't stand to wait any longer. "Pull over."

"What are you going to do?" Sebastian asked immediately. "We can't be drawing attention to ourselves."

"I won't." Ruvik eyed the pedestrians on the street, the cars in the streets. There were at least forty people in his immediate line of sight and more that would still be in range. "Trust me."

Sebastian rolled his eyes, but he did find an empty spot on the curb for them to park. They climbed out of the truck, and as Sebastian leaned against the siding, Ruvik took another moment to survey his canvas.

"This is good," he said to himself, looking from the sidewalks to the clean, white clouds overhead. "This will do nicely." He turned to Sebastian. "Do I have your permission to borrow your mind for a moment? Otherwise you won't be able to see if the test works."

Sebastian shifted his weight anxiously. "You're not hurting anyone," he said firmly. "Right?"

"Of course not." Ruvik slipped the headphones over his ears and reached for the control he'd threaded into the pocket of his hoodie. "They won't feel a thing."

Sebastian didn't look entirely convinced, but he nodded. "All right. Let's get it over with, then."

Ruvik switched the transmitter on. The electronic hum filled his ears. It reminded him of the first time he had been connected to STEM after his dissection, and for an instant he was afraid, instinct making his body ache. He hadn't anticipated that, and he drew closer to Sebastian without thinking. It must have showed in his face as well, because Sebastian put a hand on his shoulder.

"You all right?" he asked.

Ruvik took a breath and nodded. He grabbed Sebastian's wrist so that he wouldn't be able to withdraw too easily or too soon. _How foolish_ , he chided himself, closing his eyes. _What is there to be afraid of now? I am in control._

He let his mind flow outward. Each nearby human soul twinkled at the edge of his perception, ripe for the taking. That much, he was used to. Their histories opened themselves to him, and he skipped from one to the next, indulging in their sweet as well as their bitter memories. When he flexed his power, he could see and feel more than ever—dozens of minds at his fingertips, just like when he had been God in a world of his own making.

"It's working," he murmured, eyes still closed. "It's amplifying perfectly." He stretched himself to the nearby apartment buildings, and was deeply amused to find more than one couple engaged in the same kind of amorous entanglement he'd experienced for himself for the first time only hours earlier. "My range is…nearly two blocks, now. And this is the lowest setting."

Sebastian's hand tightened against his shoulder uneasily. "Okay. Does that really help us, though?"

 _You still doubt me?_ Ruvik licked his lips. "Let me show you," he said. He tapped each of the brains within his reach and told them, _it's raining_.

Every eye turned to the sky, and where there should have been blue and white in equal measure, they saw only gray. Their ears filled with the gentle rumblings of a summer storm. Even Sebastian glanced upward in confusion, believing it as well as any of them. Then the droplets started to fall, gentle and lazy. The people on the street hurried to the cover of store awnings, and the drivers flicked on their wipers. A man in a suit heading for the subway cursed and used his briefcase as an umbrella. A woman drinking coffee in her apartment moved to the window and smiled, hoping that when it passed, there would be a rainbow.

It was such a simple lie, and every single one of them believed it.

Ruvik let go of Sebastian and stood back so he could see it with his own eyes. His heart was in his throat as he watched the sidewalks darken and the traffic slow. "It works," he said, breathless with the sheer weight of his accomplishment. "Can you see it?" He plucked at Sebastian's soaking windbreaker and grinned. "You can feel it, can't you?" He pushed his hood down and turned his face upward, letting the rain slide down his cheeks. "I fooled even myself!" He laughed, and the sound of his own voice startled him into laughing again.

 _Everything is possible now_ , Ruvik thought, turning in a circle. He watched Krimson's citizens ducking for cover and wondered if this was what joy felt like. _I can do anything—everything. I can have everything I wanted._ And he laughed.

***

Sebastian was weak in the knees. He watched the rain splatter across rooftops and car hoods, stretching as far as he could see in any direction, and the people scattering beneath it. And all he could think was, _My God. What have you done?_

STEM, back in Ruvik's hands. He should have known better than to ever trust the judgment of a madman, no matter whose life and freedom hung in the balance. It was too late to take back. If Ruvik could own two square blocks of the city on a whim, there was no telling the damage he could do with time and effort on his side. A million people were slaves to his mercy.

But then Sebastian actually looked at him, and his emotions tangled. He had never seen Ruvik smile or laugh, not with anything approaching sincerity. It was bizarre and somehow humbling, seeing the delight spark in his eyes. He slicked water from his face and might have even been handsome in that moment, so openly enraptured. Sebastian waited for it to turn. He waited for the rain to turn to blood and the curl of Ruvik's lip to turn sinister, but when Ruvik faced him again, he was gleaming.

"I fooled even myself," Ruvik said again. "Look!" He plucked at his soaked hoodie and laughed. "Didn't I tell you? Even God can't make it rain in an instant, but _I_ can. Isn't it magnificent?" He leaned into Sebastian happily. "And I might not have done it without your help."

Sebastian felt ill at the words, but then Ruvik grabbed and kissed him. His mouth was excited and hopeful, and he tasted like the rain. It turned Sebastian's brain to mush. Though he was shivering with horror beneath the weight of his drenched clothing, Ruvik's lips were so warm with fondness he didn't know what to believe, and he thoughtlessly returned the affection. A monster couldn't taste so sweet, he told himself. Evil shouldn't have to rise up on its toes to reach a kiss.

By the time Ruvik pulled back, Sebastian's heart was pounding and his head was ready to spin off his shoulders. Ruvik saw his struggle, and the light drained slowly from his face. He lowered his hands to Sebastian's chest. "What are you thinking right now?"

Sebastian gulped; he couldn't believe he actually felt guilty for shattering Ruvik's celebration. The truth rose like bile up the back of his throat. "I'm thinking," he said hoarsely, "that I should have killed you when I had the chance."

Ruvik would have seen through a lie. Sebastian still regretted not giving it to him; Ruvik's expression growing hard was worse than the rain coming down. It was like watching a child lose trust for the last time, and he couldn't breathe as he waited for a response.

"Is that a threat?" Ruvik asked.

"If it is, it's an empty one," Sebastian replied. "There's no way I can stop you now. Right?"

Ruvik considered that for a long time, and when he stepped back, the rain stopped—more than stopped, it may as well have reversed. The sky was suddenly blue and white again, the streets and sidewalks were dry, and all over people blinked upwards in confusion. They held their hands out from under the store awnings and leaned forward in their car seats. Even Sebastian, having known all along it was an illusion, was dizzied by the aftermath. It had never rained at all and no trace of the lie remained.

"I suppose I can let that one go," said Ruvik, and in much the same way, he was back to his old self as if laughter had never been part of his body's vocabulary at all. He pushed the headphones off his ears. "I already broke one of our conditions last night anyway."

Sebastian blinked at him. "Wait, what? Which one?"

Ruvik opened the passenger door to the truck and climbed inside; Sebastian turned, trying to follow. "What are you talking about?"

"Don't worry; I didn't hurt anyone." Ruvik scooted behind the wheel. "Get in—I want to drive."

"You what?" He was already starting the car, so Sebastian had no choice but to climb in. "Do you mean that kiss?" he asked. Much longer and his shirt was going to be soaked from sweat instead. "You didn't _make_ me do that, did you?"

"No, that was you," Ruvik said smartly. He adjusted the mirrors, buckled his seatbelt, and pulled away from the curb. "You slept through it. Forget it—you worry too much, Seb."

 _It's not worth knowing_ , Sebastian told himself, scrubbing his face. "Don't call me that," he said.

"Joseph calls you that."

"You're not Joseph."

Ruvik hummed thoughtfully. "What about 'Cas'? That's what Bre calls you."

"You're not Bre, either," Sebastian retorted, but then he sagged into his chair. "Whatever. Call me what you want." _There's no point in arguing with him._ He took a deep breath and forced himself to focus. _Just concentrate on what comes next._

***

It had only been a few days since Sebastian last stepped foot inside KCPD, but seeing it again was still bizarre. He watched the familiar faces heading in and out of the station and wasn't sure if the tight sensation in his chest was a longing for normal days, or a reluctance to go anywhere near it. His job and even most of his comrades had failed to give him gratification in a long time even before Beacon, and since then, everything had changed. In some ways he felt like a different person altogether.

"So?" Ruvik said, standing next to him at the cross walk. "I have an idea of a plan, but you're welcome to share yours, if you have one."

Sebastian sighed, adjusting the empty duffel back on his shoulder to keep it from catching on the gun holster under his jacket. It was pointless to get irritated over petty condescension at this point. "Myra was working a dozen cases before she left," he said as they waited for the light to turn. "She was convinced they were all connected. If I show you some pictures, you'll be able to tell if Mobius snatched them, won't you?"

"Some of them may have ended up with me, yes," Ruvik said carefully. "But I wasn't Mobius' only method of making people disappear."

"There has to be some connection between them—something Myra caught on to. If we can find it, and combine it with what you know about them, it…might give us a clue how to find them." He shook his head. "It's a long shot, but it's about all we have right now."

"Agreed." The light turned, and Ruvik tugged his hood on as they crossed the street. "Where will the files be?"

"Evidence lockup is in the basement," said Sebastian. "Unless Arcott is actually working the cases, in which case, she might have some things in her office." As they drew closer Sebastian's nerves began to tighten. "All you have to do is make it so no one sees me. That's not a problem, right?"

Ruvik snorted. "You mean, sees us?"

When they reached the other side of the street, Sebastian drew them to a halt. "I think you should stay here," he said, with enough force that it wasn't merely his opinion. "We still don't know how much of the force Mobius has in their pocket. If anything goes wrong in there, better that they only get one of us." He shrugged one shoulder. "And even if there's no Mobius, it'll be easier for me to talk my way back out if I don't have to explain you."

Ruvik frowned at him. "I don't like you going in there alone."

"What, are you worried about me?" Sebastian teased, though the moment of hesitation that showed in Ruvik's face immediately made it not that funny. "You'll be watching through the eyes of everyone in there anyway, right? Just stay here, Ruvik. Be my backup. You know it's safer for both of us that way."

"I don't agree," Ruvik muttered, looking away. Then he straightened with an idea. "But all right. I'll stay here, as long as you take me with you."

"Huh?"

He switched the transmitter on. Sebastian's ears buzzed with the telltale hum of inhuman interference, but it was more subdued than when Ruvik exerted his power alone. A figure appeared next to them, forming itself out of light like the many phantoms Sebastian had seen inside STEM. It was a ghost of Ruvik. His scars flickered along his skin like static and his robe even fluttered at the edges, moved by the wind as if it were real.

"An apparition," said Ruvik and his ghost together. Their voices overlapping gave Sebastian a chill. "Only you can see it. I'll be watching everything through your senses, but if you need to communicate with me, you may find it easier to speak to me this way than by me reading your mind."

"Oh." Sebastian wasn't sure which option was creepier, but he decided having a ghost tag along wasn't the worst thing Ruvik could have suggested. "All right, fine. Just make sure no one sees either one of us." He started toward the entrance. "And if you can do something about the cameras…."

"I'll handle them," Ruvik assured, and as he leaned back against a corner of the building, his apparition fell into step alongside Sebastian and took over the conversation himself. "I don't know yet if I can disrupt a camera feed with my mind alone, but convincing security to aim them away from us for a while shouldn't be a problem."

 _This is almost too much like STEM,_ Sebastian thought, eyeing Ruvik's ghost as they approached the door. But when he looked closely, he realized Ruvik didn't look exactly how he remembered from the nightmare; there was a subtle glint of intensity that hadn't been there before that made him appear much more human. He forced himself to look away. _Don't get distracted. You need to do this fast and get the hell out._

An officer was holding the door open for a pair of women who were entering, so Sebastian slipped in with them. Ruvik simply fazed through the wall. Once inside, Sebastian's apprehension returned in full, and he stood still for a moment, watching the cops and visitors mill past. He waited for someone's head to turn or a voice to call out to him, but there was nothing. A man being dragged along in cuffs even bumped into his elbow without pausing or glancing up, as if it hadn't happened. No one knew he was there.

"Funny," Sebastian muttered as he carried on toward the far stairs. "All those times I wished everyone would leave me the hell alone…."

"Any minds you want me to read while we're here?" Ruvik offered, eyeing the different officers as they passed. "I know how you feel about that sort of thing, but this is a golden opportunity to answer any questions you have about your comrades."

Half a dozen questions popped immediately to mind, even more after Sebastian gave himself a moment to think, but then he shook his head. "No, let's not go there." Then he reconsidered. "Unless…you can tell if any of them are Mobius? I don't want you getting yourself in trouble like with Lim, if they have that mental thing you mentioned, though."

"That shouldn't be a problem for me now." Ruvik flickered out of sight. Sebastian watched him flash about the room, appearing and disappearing next to different people around the room. Trusting that he was still keeping up his protection, Sebastian continued on to the stairs. It wasn't until he was in the basement facing the door to the evidence room that he remembered he didn't have a key.

"Ruvik," he said, turning back. "I can't get into the room without a key."

Moments later, Officer Braddock appeared at the top of the stairs. Sebastian flinched back even knowing she couldn't see him. Her eyes were dull as she marched toward him, Ruvik two steps behind. Without a word or glance she unlocked the door and then turned on her heel, walking out again.

"Will that do?" Ruvik asked.

"Thanks," Sebastian grunted, and he let himself in. "Did you find anything out?"

"No." Ruvik sounded disappointed. "Your captain has an inkling of Mobius' existence, but nothing we can use."

Sebastian had the path to the files memorized. Three boxes sat on the end of a far shelf, but when he looked inside, two of them were empty. He cursed under his breath. "They're not all here." He pulled the one box that still had papers in it to a nearby table and began flipping through it. "These are the oldest of the disappearances, going back a few years. Nothing specifically connects them to the newer ones, other than Myra's hunch." He opened one file and turned it toward Ruvik. "Recognize him?"

"I'm not really here, you know," said Ruvik. "I can only see through your eyes."

Sebastian pulled a face and looked for himself: it was a middle-aged man, Aaron Grossbeck, who disappeared from his hospital room after undergoing hernia surgery. "I don't recognize him," said Ruvik. "Try another one."

Sebastian paged through two more until pulling up the file of Patricia Yates, a school teacher who took a personal day to visit her mother and never came back. The mother reported having never seen her, either. "Ahh," said Ruvik. "Her, I remember."

 _Don't ask_ , Sebastian told himself. _Don't fucking ask what he did to her._ "Did Mobius say anything to you about her?" he asked instead. "Anything that might have indicated why they picked her?"

"Nothing I remember," said Ruvik. "Not that I would have paid attention to those kinds of details, back then." He hummed thoughtfully. "But her mother showed up a few weeks later."

"Her mother?" Sebastian opened the report again. "Madeline? They don't say anything about her being missing in here."

"With next of kin already dead, there might not have been anyone left to report it. Or maybe it was purposefully left out."

Sebastian frowned at his wife's signature at the bottom of the page. "Myra went over these files all the time," he muttered, his eyes glossing over the text again and again. "She was thorough. She would have followed up with the mother—she wouldn't have missed that."

Ruvik turned away, his eyes on the ceiling. "Detective Arcott is in the building," he said. "She has the remaining files in her office, if you want to relieve her of them."

"Yeah." Sebastian started shoving folders into the duffel bag. "Wait until we're up there, and then convince her to take an early lunch or something. There's a few things in my office I want to grab while we're here, too."

The homicide department was located on the second floor. Though Sebastian didn't like the thought of taking the elevator, maneuvering his bag and his crutch on the stairs was an even less appealing prospect. Ruvik assured him that the camera would remain mysteriously off for the short trip. As they arrived and made their way down the hall, they passed Arcott heading the other way with her partner, the both of them having decided to visit a sub shop down the street before the afternoon rush. They were talking about her daughter's upcoming recital. Little Tammy Arcott and Lily Castellanos used to be in the same kindergarten. Sebastian stared straight ahead.

"Someone's here in the station," said Ruvik as they let themselves into the office. "But it's strange. I can't quite see them."

Sebastian moved swiftly to Arcott's files and started digging through them for familiar names. "What does that even mean?"

"I'm not sure yet." He had his head cocked to the side like a dog trying to catch a scent. "It's like Lim but…different, somehow. Like a black hole."

"Be careful," Sebastian warned. "Once I've found what we're looking for, we can just leave."

Ruvik considered for a while longer and then said, "I'm going to get a closer look."

"Leave it alone. If Mobius is here, we should get the hell—"

A jolt of pain flashed through Sebastian's skull, making his ears rings with the ever-familiar whine of mental feedback. The impact of it crumpled his knees, and he had to grip the desk tight to keep from falling over. " _Shit_ ," he hissed as he gripped his temples, waiting for it to pass. "You stupid shit, _I told you_." When the spell had ended he straightened up and looked around the room, but Ruvik's apparition had vanished.

"Ruvik?" Sebastian closed his eyes and concentrated, even if he felt like a fool doing it. "Fuck, Ruvik, can you hear me?" But he couldn't feel the tingle of a mind at the edge of his senses anymore, and with more cursing he dug back into the files.

 _Mobius is here._ He found the names he was looking for and shoveled the folders into his duffel. _Maybe even Lim himself, or…someone worse._ _And if it's the same as last time, Ruvik's lying unconscious on the sidewalk._ The thought twisted his stomach more than he thought it should. _God damn it._ He shouldered the bag and rushed out, but once in the hall he caught a glimpse of someone getting off the elevator, and he retreated into his own office.

 _At least him being unconscious out there is better than him being unconscious in here_ , he reassured himself as he moved to his desk. _He'll be all right. The worst that'll happen is someone calls an ambulance for him. If you can figure out who this Mobius fuck is, you can at least get Remington to hold him for a while, give you time to get out of here._ He ripped his desk drawers open, grabbing up his spare set of keys, an extra carton of .38's, and his backup weapon, which he tucked into the back of his jeans. _Your word still has to count for something around here. Doesn't it?_

When Sebastian turned to go, his eye caught on one of the missing person's posters on the wall. Myra was watching him. "Almost," he promised. "I've almost got them."

The door opened. Sebastian tensed, reaching for the gun in his pants, but a man stepped through before he had time to draw. He was greeted with the round, crop-cut head of Detective Phi. Fucking Internal Affairs.

Phi blinked at him in confusion, but then he quickly transitioned into annoyance. "Castellanos?"

"Yeah?" Sebastian faked an itch in his side, not yet willing to let his hand get too far away from the gun. "What?"

"I thought I heard someone in here," Phi said, stepping further inside. "What are you doing?"

"What do you think I'm doing? This is my damn office." Sebastian eyed him warily, but his gut told him that as much of a prick as Phi was, he wasn't the kind of cop to go on the take, let alone fall for Mobius' bullshit. He gave up on the gun and instead headed for the door. "I just needed to pick up some things."

"You look like hell," Phi said, not that there was any sympathy in his voice. "What did you do to your leg?"

"None of your business."

He had just reached the door when Phi took his elbow, halting him. "You being a fuck-up is _exactly_ my business," Phi said angrily. "Where the hell have you been the past few days? I warned you that if you went off on your own again—"

"I don't have time for another lecture, Phi," Sebastian growled. "Let go of my arm."

Phi looked like he would have liked to take a swing at him, which wasn't all that unusual, but he hadn't worked up the courage in years and he wasn't about to find it then, either. He sighed and let go. "Fine, go," he grumbled. "But at least tell Oda you're all right, won't you? Before he has kittens?"

Sebastian stared at him. "What?"

"Your partner?" Phi reminded him crossly. "You know, the guy with the glasses? He doesn't show it but you and I both know how he worries about you." The more he talked, the quieter his voice seemed to become, as if Sebastian were drifting away from him. "All this time you've been ranting about him being kidnapped or some nonsense, and now it's his turn, chasing you. You two are something else."

It didn't make sense. Sebastian kept staring at him, expecting a laugh, or a betrayal, or something else that would have fit to reality. He could barely breathe. "Joseph's here?"

"Yeah," said Phi, his temper weakening in the face of Sebastian's utter bewilderment. "He just came in—he's with the captain. They're probably filing out a MPR for you right now."

 _No, that can't be_. Sebastian shook his head, and when Phi touched his arm again, he shoved it off. _Mobius has him. They're torturing him._ "I have to go," he managed to get out, and he limped into the hall.

"Get your shit together, Castellanos!" Phi called after him. A couple heads turned from the detectives at their desks, but Sebastian ignored them, rushing into the stairwell as quickly as his weary legs would take him.

"Ruvik," Sebastian hissed as he made his way down a floor. "You picked a shit time to pass out on me."

He burst out of the stairwell and into the lobby. More heads turned, and Sebastian thought he heard someone say his name. He ignored them, too, heading toward the captain's office. He had no idea what he expected to find, or what he would say or do if Joseph really was inside. He didn't know what it would mean for his alliance with Ruvik if he was. But he had to know for himself, and as he drew closer, he could see a pair of figures seated in front of Captain Remington's desk. One was a woman, but the other, even obscured through the blinds, was unmistakably Joseph.

Sebastian sagged against his crutch as the breath rushed out of him. _Thank God_ , he thought. _He's okay._ He couldn't even begin to wonder how he'd gotten out—it didn't matter as long as he was safe. _Christ, how are you ever going to tell him everything that's happened?_

He took a step forward, but just then, Joseph and his companion stood up. The shift in angle made the woman's face visible for a moment, and Sebastian stopped cold. It was Tatiana Gutierrez.

He'd never seen her in the real world. He wasn't sure he'd ever seen the real _her_ , but there was no mistaking the unimpressed look in her eyes; he felt immediately that he was back in the ward, her voice echoing among haunted corridors. And she was there with Joseph. She was shaking hands with the captain.

 _No. No, what is this?_ Sebastian staggered back, bumping into a uniformed officer. The man startled, taking Sebastian's arm to steady him. "Whoa," the man said. "Are you…oh, Detective." He straightened up with recognition. "Are you all right, sir?"

Sebastian looked and was sure he should have recognized the man, but his brain stumbled over his name. "No," he mumbled, too stunned to lie. He looked to the office, where the captain was moving around his desk as if they were all about to leave. "I'm not."

The door opened. Sebastian obeyed his raw instinct, turning in full retreat for the station's exit. With his legs in motion again, his wits finally caught up. _It was her_ , he thought, ignoring curious voices at his back as he charged out of the station and onto the sidewalk. _Mobius' scientist—the one who cut Ruvik's brain out of his God damned skull. She's the black hole that took Ruvik out._

A group of people were gathered at the corner of the next intersection, and Sebastian hurried into their midst. As he'd feared Ruvik was on the ground, propped up against the building, but he wasn't unconscious; his fingers were wound tight in his hood, which he had dragged as far down over his face as it would reach. His knees were drawn up and he was shaking. A woman had crouched down and was rubbing his back to try and comfort him. "Someone should call an ambulance," she said to the small crowd.

"No," Sebastian said quickly. He dropped his things and knelt down in front of Ruvik. "No, he's…he's mine. He's with me." He squeezed Ruvik's hands. "Ruvik, it's me—it's Sebastian. Can you hear me?"

Ruvik peeked out from under the hood. His eyes were bloodshot, but he looked fully aware. "Cas?"

Sebastian's lip quirked with relief. "Yeah, sure." He drew Ruvik's hands to his shoulders. "Hold onto me; I'll help you up."

Ruvik held tight, leaning into Sebastian as they climbed upright. A few people helped them, and a man even handed Sebastian his crutch back once Ruvik was steady on his feet. "Are you all right?" Sebastian asked. "Can you walk?"

"Yes." Ruvik shook himself and seemed to be fully composed, though there was still strain in his face. "I can walk."

"Good, because we need to run." Sebastian shouldered the duffel bag. "I know who it was in the station."

"Are you sure you're all right?" asked the woman that had come to Ruvik's aid. "My car's right nearby; I can take him to the hospital."

"No—thank you." Sebastian managed a smile and a nod; it was oddly reassuring to know the entire damn city wasn't against them. "I've got him."

He glanced back toward the station entrance, fearful of whoever might be coming out of it, but he couldn't have expected what he saw: a ghost was standing at the door, white and translucent, and on top of that somehow even paler still. He was dressed in the heavy clothes of a Beacon patient and his eyes were heavy and accusatory. Sebastian felt a chill as he stared back at the figure, baffled. "Leslie?"

Ruvik flinched. "What?"

Sebastian was still trying to make sense of the apparition when it abruptly vanished, disturbed out of existence by the station door opening. A man stepped through and he didn't have to see his face to know who it was. "We have to go," he said, dragging Ruvik through the remaining crowd of onlookers and around the corner. They were heading away from the truck, but any other way would have made them too visible.

"Joseph's here," Sebastian said as they followed along the building's side. "But he's with Gutierrez. They wouldn't have let him go, right?"

"I don't know," Ruvik admitted. "I couldn't see him."

It sounded much eerier the second time. "What does that _mean_?"

"I don't think I can explain now."

They crossed the street, then entered a fenced in parking lot, and from there took to the alleyway behind a line of small storefronts. There was no sign of a pursuit but Sebastian's gut told him not to slow down. Then Ruvik drew them to a halt. "Give me the bag," he said. "We need to move faster, and you're hurting enough already."

Sebastian hadn't paid any attention to his leg, but as soon as Ruvik mentioned it, his thigh burned with the sudden stress he'd put on it. He handed off the duffel and they continued on, past dumpsters and private driveways. "Maybe we can circle back around to the truck," he muttered, laying out a map in his head. "There's a subway station not that far from here—we can take the yellow line down one stop…come out on 31st Street. Then—"

"Sebastian!"

He stopped. His heart thudded against his stomach and he turned, staring between the buildings to the fenced-in patio of an uptown pub. Joseph had chased them after all and was on the sidewalk, watching him through the bars. Sebastian held his breath, but when relief broke across Joseph's face, he couldn't help himself; nothing else mattered and he headed toward him.

"Sebastian," Ruvik warned, reaching for his arm too late. "Wait!"

Sebastian went anyway. Once on the patio, he dropped his crutch against a chair and ran, catching himself against the fence. Joseph was already gripping the bars, and Sebastian covered his hands with his own, needing the physical reassurance that he was really there. "Joseph." He grinned, exhausted and elated. "Holy shit, it's good to see you."

Joseph's own smile was tight, as if he were trying to hold back his emotions; Sebastian was so used to the familiar expression it made him ache _._ "I thought you were dead," said Joseph. "I thought…." He trailed off, wincing. "You look terrible."

"I feel worse." He looked Joseph over to make an assessment of his own, and was a little taken aback by his wardrobe: a black suit jacket and tie over a red striped shirt, unusual choices for him. But he looked whole and unharmed. He was about to say again how thankful he was to see him, but then he suddenly remembered their circumstances, and he glanced up and down the street. There was no sign of Tatiana. "Where is…?"

"The next ally up is open, I think," said Joseph. "Let's meet up there."

He leaned back, but Sebastian kept hold of his hands to prevent him from pulling away. "Wait," he said urgently. "Where's Gutierrez?"

Joseph frowned at him. "She's bringing the car around. Why?"

 _No_. Sebastian's hair stood on end, but he didn't want to believe what was already so obvious. _No, he's just confused._ "We have to get out of here," he said. "Before she finds us."

"Why? You should let her look at your leg—you were limping pretty badly just now."

Sebastian shook his head. "No, she's one of—"

The air next to him flickered, and Sebastian felt the press of a hand against his arm as Ruvik's apparition took shape at his side. "Sebastian," Ruvik said hurriedly. "We have to go."

"No—wait." Sebastian tried to shake him off but couldn't. "He has to come with us."

Joseph glanced back and forth with increasing concern. "Sebastian?"

"That's not your partner anymore," Ruvik insisted. "He's under Mobius' control—we have to leave him or they'll get to us, too."

"We're not leaving him!"

"Who are you…?" Joseph straightened, and the look of horrified realization that came over him was exactly what Sebastian himself was feeling. "It's Ruvik, isn't it?" he asked. "He's here with you."

"It's not whatever you're thinking," said Sebastian quickly. "I can explain _after_ we get the hell out of here."

Joseph slipped one hand out from under Sebastian's and grabbed up the radio from his belt. "He's here," he said into it, and Sebastian felt dizzy. "We're outside O'Hare's on Hensway. I think Ruvik is influencing him."

"We're in position," Tatiana came back.

"No—wait—!" Sebastian reached through the bars, trying to draw Joseph in again. " _You're_ the one who…." He noticed then, with Joseph's hand at his ear, that he wasn't wearing his usual black leather gloves; they were white. He let go of Joseph's hand that was still holding the fence and found a red star emblazoned across the back of his palm.

" _Sebastian_." The apparition disappeared, and Ruvik himself was at Sebastian's back, yanking at his jacket. "Let's go!"

As soon as Joseph saw Ruvik, he drew his gun. Sebastian instinctually reached behind him, making sure he was out of the line of fire, which only made the shock and betrayal Joseph was fixing them with worse. "Seb, get out of the way."

Sebastian staggered back several steps, letting Ruvik pull him. His mind was quickly going blank. "You don't understand," he tried again. "Ruvik's not the one who—"

A black car stopped next to the curb, and men in black suits and white gloves climbed out. Tatiana was with them, and the sight of her jolted Sebastian enough that he turned to retreat. When Ruvik gripped his hand the pain vanished from his overworked leg and they ran back down the alley, crutch forgotten.

"Sebastian, wait!" Joseph continued to shout after them, and when Sebastian looked over his shoulder, he blanched at the sight of him scaling the wrought iron fence with too little effort. Tatiana was relaying their location through her radio, and the men were fanning out. There were probably more; they would soon be trapped.

Sebastian clenched his teeth and ran.


	10. Chapter 10

There were at least six of them. They stood out against Ruvik's vision of the city like film spots, their empty space unnerving him more than he cared for. There hadn't been any blind spots in STEM, and his new device completed him in ways it never could. He should have been Godlike, not fleeing through back alleys from a handful of thugs, no matter what master was behind their whip.

But Sebastian's hand was tight and sweating. He was painless at the moment, but his body had limits that would catch up to them before long, made worse by the frenzied state of his mind. His shock and confusion were a contagion they couldn't afford, but Ruvik felt it infecting him anyway. He knew even better than Sebastian what fate awaited them in Mobius' lair if they were caught.

They passed through a fenced-in park, shoving their way through the partially opened gate and into a small parking lot behind a row of duplexes. Sebastian put a hand against the cars as they passed. "Joseph would never help them willingly," he said as Ruvik continued to drag them onward. "What the hell did they do to him?"

"I don't know," said Ruvik. He had been offered insight into their methods once, but declined—their medieval practices couldn't have been a match for his level of research. So he had thought, at the time.

"But you can help him, right?" Sebastian pressed. "You can undo it?"

"I don't know!" Ruvik stretched his senses, trying to check on the locations of their pursuers, only to realize there were two unaccounted for. He gritted his teeth, instead borrowing the eyes of civilians on the streets, trying to spot their black suits. In his distraction, he clipped a side mirror with the duffel bag and was nearly jerked to a halt; Sebastian stumbled into him, and they braced each other, trying to catch their breath.

"Can't you just take control of him for now?" Sebastian asked, his desperation making Ruvik sweat. "Make him come with us, and we can sort him out once we're safe?"

Ruvik whirled on him. "I can't even see him—how do you expect me to do that?" he demanded, though his anger wasn't meant for Sebastian. "If I'm going to 'take control' of anyone it'll be _you_ so we can—" He cut himself off when a young cab driver spotted two agents in black suits turning the corner—more were coming out of the alley behind them. "Damn it."

Sebastian drew his gun, but that wasn't about to help them. Ruvik pushed him back against a rusty car and took control of the nerves in his legs, forcing him down on his knees. Despite the angry protests that earned him, he dropped the duffel full of their files and put himself in front of Sebastian as the agents approached with their guns drawn. A man and a woman came toward them from the street side—Joseph and another man jogged up from the rear. They quickly fanned out to surround the pair.

"Ruvik," Sebastian hissed, gripping his pant leg. "What the fuck did you—"

"Quiet," Ruvik snapped back. "Just wait, and run when I tell you."

He reached behind him, and Sebastian took his hand again. Maybe he was only hoping to get feeling back for his legs, but the grip of five unsteady fingers around his made Ruvik's heart pound. A ferocity swelled in his chest he wasn't prepared for, and he stared down their attackers with all the righteous hate that had fueled him for a lifetime.

 _He belongs to me_ , he thought, eyes flicking from one to the next, unflinching in the face of their emptiness. _You vermin cannot take him._

Joseph had his handgun aimed at Ruvik's head. "Sebastian," he said, and Ruvik burned with frustration that a mind that had once been so pliable to him was suddenly so far out of reach. "It's all right—come over here."

Sebastian's hand tightened until Ruvik's knuckles ached. "Joseph, this isn't you," he said. "These people are using you!"

The woman was reporting their location to Tatiana over the radio. "Should we just shoot him?" suggested the man on her right. "It's Castellanos we're here for."

"No—hold your fire," Joseph said immediately. The strain in his face even looked genuine. "If Ruvik's been controlling him for this long, we don't know what'll happen to him if he's killed."

Sebastian shook his head. "I'm not the one who—"

"Cas," said Ruvik, and watching Joseph bristle was unexpectedly satisfying. "You're wasting your breath. He can't hear you."

Joseph narrowed his eyes on him. "Step away from him, Ruvik. There are more of us coming, and your tricks aren't going to work on me this time. I'll shoot you if I have to."

"I'm counting on it." Ruvik glanced between Joseph's three cohorts. Each of them had undergone some of Mobius' mysterious process, but they weren't equally impenetrable; up close, he could detect echoes of memories from the man on Joseph's left, like figures moving about in dense fog. He swung all his focus onto the agent, and most importantly, his gloved hands around his gun. He squeezed Sebastian's hand to signal him for readiness, and was relieved when Sebastian tensed behind him in understanding.

 _He's mine—you can't have him_ , Ruvik thought again, and then he was in the agent's nervous system. He turned the gun toward the woman on Joseph's other side and pulled the trigger.

Joseph lurched back as the woman was shot twice through the face. Even before she had the chance to fall Ruvik gave Sebastian his legs back, and he yanked him upright, leading them in another mad dash toward the street. It didn't buy them as much time as he would have hoped; he turned his slave toward the remaining agent, but then Joseph put a bullet through the man's head. He didn't hesitate. Sebastian flinched at the report of the gun.

"Sebastian!" Joseph shouted after them, and Ruvik tensed in anticipation of gunshots, but he instead followed on foot. "Wait, I'm trying to help you!"

They reached the sidewalk. There were a handful of people about, heads turned curiously toward the parking lot at the sound of the shots, and Ruvik put each of them to work; he tapped everyone in range and forced them to rush forward, putting as many hapless citizens between them and their pursuers as possible. But when Sebastian realized what he was up to, he gave Ruvik's arm a yank.

"Don't involve them!" he said angrily. "You promised!"

"This isn't the time for that!" Ruvik scowled; there weren't enough people to make for an effective shield anyway, so instead he pulled Sebastian toward the street. A red four-door was stopped at the light, and Ruvik forced the driver to unlock the doors so he could rip one open and shove Sebastian inside. "Get in!"

Sebastian tumbled into the back seat, and it wasn't until Ruvik climbed in after that he realized he'd grabbed up the duffel bag before their escape. "You should have left the bag," he scolded as he pulled the door shut behind him.

"We need these files to—"

" _Get down_." Ruvik grabbed Sebastian's shoulder to drag him down below the windows. "I can keep the driver from noticing us, but not them."

"They already saw which car we got into," Sebastian retorted as their unwitting chauffer turned right and sped off. "This isn't going to work."

"Trust me; I have a plan."

Ruvik cupped his hands over his headphones. Logically he knew that didn't do anything, but even a gesture of concentration helped him focus. He saw through the driver's eyes, and from him flickered from one citizen to the next, forcing them to brake or turn or merge wherever necessary to keep their path clear. None of them would even realize why they were doing it, so well-honed was his craft. He was even able to use them to track the Mobius agents in their own vehicles, struggling to follow through Ruvik's continuing blockade of slow-moving traffic. As soon as he was convinced they were out of their direct line of sight, he slowed.

"We're coming up to another intersection," he said. "There's a blue van heading our way. When it stops, get in."

They stopped at the intersection, and Sebastian put his hand on the door. "I can't believe he just shot that man," he muttered. "He didn't even blink."

"It's not him," Ruvik reassured him, though he wasn't sure why he bothered. "You know that."

"I know, but...." Sebastian cursed under his breath and kicked the door open. The van stopped obediently next to them, and they rushed from one getaway car to the next. In the driver's seat was a woman, her infant son in a car-seat behind her. Between the two of them and the duffel it was too much of a struggle to get in, and Ruvik had to climb into the front passenger seat. Then they were off again, just as a black SUV rounded the corner.

"I don't think they saw us," said Ruvik. "We should be all right for a while."

"We're not staying here," Sebastian replied quickly. "Find us something else."

Ruvik glanced back at him; he was crammed down between the seats, a toddler kicking and gurgling above him, but he was very well hidden, and their driver was as receptive to him as anyone could be. "When we get to the next block over, we—"

"We're not staying in a van with a mother and a child," Sebastian insisted. "Find us something else."

"Just because your Joseph is willing to kill a comrade in cold blood doesn't mean he'll execute civilians to get to us, if that's what you're worried about," Ruvik said, but the look that came over Sebastian's face made him regret it, and he sighed. "All right. Get ready to move again."

The van stopped, and the Escalade behind them laid on the horn in irritation. Ruvik's temper flared and he took control of the man driving it, along with several others up and down the street just to be sure. No one on the street, in the stores, or even looking out their high rise windows would see the pair of men retreating from a mother's mini-van into the back of a silver SUV. At least there was more room for them.

"Better?" Ruvik asked as they settled into hiding again.

Sebastian sank into the leather. "Thank you," he muttered, and Ruvik wasn't sure what to do with that, so he focused on spying on the city around them, trying to judge if their escape plan was still working. It was starting to become tiring, but he set his jaw and didn't relent.

And then he felt it: the twinkle of a familiar mind at the edge of his reach, back toward the police station. After being forced to consider Joseph temporarily lost to him, he was pleased to find one of his STEM subjects still wide open. "Kidman's here," he said, and Sebastian turned toward him. "They have her on standby, a few blocks down."

"Is she alone? Can you contact her?"

"She's not alone, but I think I can reach her." Ruvik closed his eyes, and without thinking about it, he took Sebastian's hand. "It's a good thing you didn't kill her after all."

***

Juli's hand was starting to sweat around the radio. She hadn't gone into the "field trip" with high hopes regardless, but so far she'd had no opportunity to see let alone speak with Joseph, with her and Dennis positioned as backup two blocks down, and now Sebastian was in trouble. Even if she were alone interference would have been a risk; with Dennis behind the wheel she couldn't even make that choice. All she could do was cling to the radio, listening to Tatiana and her agents scouring the roadways for their prey.

"They're not in the car," one of them reported in. "They're either on foot or they switched vehicles."

"Keep looking," said Tatiana. "Watch for any cars driving or stopping erratically as you head toward the station. They may have doubled back."

Dennis hummed doubtfully. "If this is what Ruvik is capable of, they could be anywhere," he said.

Juli held the radio to her mouth. "Ma'am, should Agent Green and I assist?"

"Negative, Agent Kidman. Hold your position and keep your eyes open."

Juli bit back a curse and put the radio down. After another few moments of stewing in frustration, she opened her door. "I can't see anything from in here," she said by way of explanation. "I won't go far." She climbed out but she left the door open, leaning against it as she stared into the passing traffic.

 _If they catch Sebastian, too, will all of this have been for nothing?_ she thought as her eyes snapped from one car to the next. _Is it worth it to blow my cover now if it means getting away with him? Can we even hope to save Joseph without one of us on the inside?_ She bit her lip hard. _What should I do?_

"You'll do what I tell you," said Ruvik.

Juli whipped around. All of a sudden the world around her darkened to gray, and the noise from the street quieted to murmurs. A ghost stood in front of her, just like the lord of STEM that she remembered, tattered and burned and translucent. "Ruvik—"

She tried to reach for her gun, but she couldn't move; her hands were locked at her sides and her heels rooted to the sidewalk. "I'm not going to hurt you," Ruvik said, though his word was less than reassuring. "I need you to listen. Sebastian and I have a truck parked on Fifth and Kingsler. We may need your help to keep Mobius away from us as we make our way there."

"'Sebastian and I'?" Juli echoed. "You're together?"

"It's a long story." Ruvik tilted his head. "As is yours, I'm sure. I should have taken what we needed from you at Beacon."

He took her hand, and everything reversed. She remembered sitting with Dennis in the SUV only a moment ago, and then the drive they'd taken through the city to get there, like a tape being rewound. She could feel her eyes being forced to the street signs, and once she'd been pulled far enough, the exterior of the building. A little further and she was climbing backwards out of the passenger side, looking over her shoulder to the garage entrance, where Myra stood, seeing them off.

Ruvik jerked his hand back, and the memories fled. A look of shock crossed his face that Juli never would have expected to see on him. "His wife," he said. "She's Mobius?"

Juli was so caught off guard by his apparent confusion that she wasn't sure how to respond. She didn't get the chance anyway; without warning the world returned to full color and sound, and Juli startled, finding herself alone. She turned back and forth, but there was no sign of Ruvik.

"Juli?" Dennis had his head ducked, trying to see her through the open door. "You okay?"

Juli shook herself, and once sure again that she was alone, she closed the door and hurried around to the open the driver's side. "Move over," she said, and when Dennis stared at her, she was tempted to give him a push. "Come on—I want to drive."

Dennis scooted reluctantly to the passenger side. "Did you see them?"

"Not exactly." Juli climbed behind the wheel and buckled herself in. "But I have an idea where they might be headed." With the door closed and windows down, she pulled away from the curb, heading toward Fifth Avenue. It was risky to attempt to meet them with Dennis along for the ride, but she had no way of effectively deciding whether blowing her cover was worth it if she didn't know the situation. Finding Sebastian would at least put her in a position to decide one way or the other.

***

Sebastian kept his head down and tried not to think about anything but escape. It seemed that every time he blinked he saw a flash of the red Mobius star behind his eyelids, and a frozen image of Joseph, always the calm and rational one, shooting a man dead without a second thought. Not that Sebastian spared any regret for the cretin himself—any agent of the enemy deserved worse than a bullet to the head—and Joseph had no way to know that Ruvik wouldn't have killed him, too, had he not acted. But that image dug under his skin, filled his ears with the report of the gun. If he dwelled on it for too long, there was a good chance he'd go back for his partner and shake some proper sense into him.

He peeked out the window, the familiar streets resetting his bearings. They didn't have much further to go. Then the driver of their escape car abruptly cursed and hit the brakes. Sebastian half tumbled into the foot well, his knees jamming up against the back of the driver's seat. Thanks to Ruvik he barely felt it.

The driver was glaring at them through the rearview mirror. "Who the fuck are—"

A squeal of tires behind them came too late for Sebastian to brace himself. Another vehicle hit them from behind, having not swerved fast enough to avoid the halted SUV. The entire car jolted with the impact, throwing both men violently into the seats again. Though Sebastian was thankfully still pain-free, his vision swam and his head spun more than ever. _That's going to hurt like a bitch when you're on your own_ , he thought distantly as he struggled to right himself. "Ruvik…?"

Ruvik had fared worse in the crash. He looked shaken, the headphones dangling off his neck and blood dripping from his nose. There wasn't time to blame him for whatever had gone wrong; Sebastian shoved his door open and clambered out of the SUV, onto the street.

"What the hell did you stop for?" the second driver was shouting as he got out of his truck. He looked ready to start a fight, but he backed off quickly enough when Sebastian tugged his jacket open, showing off the revolver holstered against his chest. Handling the rest wouldn't be so easy. Cars were already stopped in both lanes, a few pedestrians watching from the sidewalks. They'd already drawn too much attention and he had no idea how far behind them Mobius really was.

Sebastian moved around the SUV as fast as he could and yanked Ruvik's door open. "Ruvik—come on." He helped him climb out and then grabbed the duffel, slinging it over his shoulder. "Are you all right?"

"I was distracted," Ruvik mumbled, scraping his bloody nose against his sleeve. "Talking to Kidman...."

"Don't push yourself," Sebastian warned, grabbing Ruvik's elbow. There weren't any alleyways for them to duck into, so he led them to the nearest intersection, hoping that by getting around a corner, they would lose the worst of the eyes. "If you pass out now, we're fucked."

"I'm not going to pass out," Ruvik retorted. He pulled the headphones back on, and the people that had only a moment ago been gaping at the crash and the fleeing participants immediately went back to their business. Even the two drivers got back in their cars, preparing to leave the scene as if nothing had happened. Though the street was on its swift way back to normal, Ruvik shook his head. "It's too late—one of them saw."

Sebastian looked over his shoulder and spotted it: one of the black SUVs was heading in their direction. He picked up his pace, and as he swung his gaze forward, he caught a glimpse of a figure watching them from across the street. By the time he was able to focus, it was already gone, but he felt he already knew who it was.

 _Leslie_. He pulled Ruvik into the party store on the corner. _But it can't be. What the hell is going on?_

The owner was behind the counter. He easily recognized his best customer for cigarettes and nodded a greeting, only to straighten up at the sight of blood. "Hey, are you okay?"

"We're fine," Sebastian said quickly, already leading Ruvik toward the back. "We just need to borrow the bathroom."

"Yeah, sure. Help yourself."

Sebastian knew well enough that the bathroom had only one stall and one exit. If Joseph had seen them enter, the owner would think nothing of giving them up to him. So he pulled Ruvik into the back instead, behind the refrigerators. There was a shipping door they would be able to sneak through, get back into some cover, make their way to the truck—

Pain flooded into Sebastian's healing leg like a tidal wave, and he almost collapsed, just barely catching himself against a heap of plastic cartons full of booze. " _Fuck_ ," he growled, letting go of Ruvik so he could concentrate for a moment on getting his knees to stop shaking. The impact from the car crash echoed through him. _At least you can say you were right_ , he thought. "God _damn_ it, Ruvik, you have to give me some warning when you do that!"

He looked up and felt like cursing all over again. Ruvik was still upright, but he was deathly pale and his eyes were rolled back, unfocused. "No—fuck—" Sebastian said, grabbing his hand. "You can't do this now!" Not knowing what else to do, he dragged Ruvik's thumb between his teeth and bit down, _hard_.

Ruvik came back into himself with a gasp, and he quickly wrenched his hand free. "What are you doing?" he demanded angrily.

"Just _stop_." Sebastian managed to straighten up, and he pushed the headphones off Ruvik's ears. "Stop already—you're frying your brain out and it's going to get us caught!"

The front door of the shop gave a jingle, and without looking back Sebastian took Ruvik's elbow again, guiding him through shelves of stock toward the rear exit. "We're almost there," he said, though without Ruvik's help every step threatened to collapse him again. "We can make it."

"I'm all right," Ruvik insisted, though he was sounding less convincing all the time. "I can at least…."

Sebastian's pain began to fade again, but he shook his head, shoving Ruvik ahead of him. "Don't—not even that. I can hold out."

They burst out of the shop, raced through the small employee lot, and hopped a short stone fence into a stand of trees. It didn't offer much into the way of cover, but they made the most of it, staying down as they continued on behind a line of stores. They were only one block away from the truck, but they would have to cross into the open again, and even if they reached it, that was no guarantee of safety. Sebastian couldn't see anyone pursuing but he could _feel_ Mobius was close. Their odds were diminishing with every minute passed.

And then Ruvik slowed down. Sebastian gave him a push, but that only managed to spur him on a few more steps before he stopped completely, wobbling on his feet. "What is it?" Sebastian asked impatiently. He stepped up closer to see his face. "Are you all right or not?"

Ruvik shook his head. He twisted his fingers in Sebastian's sleeve and looked ready to either vomit or hit the ground. Sebastian couldn't bring himself to say "I told you so" as he urged Ruvik to lean against the nearest tree trunk. "We're almost there," he said again, squeezing Ruvik's hand hard enough to bruise. "You can make it. Just focus on me, all right? I'm your anchor, remember?"

He heard shoes on the grass behind them. Instinctively he drew his gun, but by the time he turned, it was too late, as a pair of agents in black suits was on them. One was a man in glasses, pocks dotting his cheeks; familiarity nibbled at the back of Sebastian's brain but he couldn't place him. The woman, he could, and his heart skipped. It was Juli.

"Drop the gun, Castellanos," the man ordered, and Juli took a few steps to the side for a better flanking position. "There's nowhere to go now." He cast a half a smirk in Juli's direction. "I told you I saw something."

"I believed you," Juli replied.

Sebastian glanced between the two of them, but he kept his gun aimed at the stranger. "We already did this dance earlier," he said, searching Juli's face for some hint of her intentions. She had seemed plenty like herself at Beacon, but after watching Joseph all but transform in front of his eyes, he couldn't trust anything. "And two of you wound up dead. Back off or it'll be you this time."

Long fingers twisted in his jacket. They were shivering, and feeling those tiny vibrations against his shoulder blades wracked Sebastian's already frenzied emotions. Though he'd seen Ruvik display moments of vulnerability during their bizarre partnership, it wasn't the same, facing down the enemy with something to protect at his back. He wondered briefly what Ruvik had felt when it had been his turn.

"There's nowhere to go, Detective," the stranger was saying. "It's over. You don't have to listen to that cretin anymore—we can help you."

"Help me like you helped Joseph?" Sebastian retorted. "Yeah, no thanks. I'd rather take the bullet."

"If that's your call—"

"Dennis," said Juli, her face still damnably unreadable. "Call it in."

"Oh, right." He had to change his grip on the gun to reach the radio clipped to his belt. He raised it to his lips, but before he had time to even press the call button, Juli turned her gun on him and fired.

Sebastian flinched, and though he ought to have been relieved, his stomach turned as Dennis dropped, a hole in each temple. He looked to Juli and found her stunned by her own actions, but after a moment she took in a deep breath. "I'm sorry," she said, dragging her fingers through her hair. "I wanted to be close in case you needed my help, but then Dennis saw you go into the store. I couldn't convince him to not follow."

"Shit." Sebastian finally began to relax. "Thanks."

He started to lower his gun, but then Juli turned hers on him, and he followed suit. "Whoa—what the hell are you doing?"

Whatever uncertainty had been in Juli's expression a moment ago, it was already gone. "Step away from him, Ruvik," she said.

Ruvik tensed against Sebastian's back. "Wait," Sebastian said quickly. "Stop." If Ruvik fought too hard to take her mind, he'd either put himself down with the effort, or worse, he'd succeed. "We're all on the same side here."

"He's controlling you," Juli insisted, and she stepped to the side as if she might be able to get a clean shot with a different angle. "It's what he does—it's what he _is_."

"He's not fucking controlling me," he snapped back, turning enough to continue shielding Ruvik with his body. "It's Mobius that's controlling you!"

"I'm not—" Juli scowled with frustration; she looked like she was ready to unravel, and Sebastian ached, knowing just how she felt. "They don't know where we are now, but they will soon," she tried again. "And we can't let them get their hands on Ruvik. We can just end this now."

Sebastian's mind buzzed with a familiar signal, and he reached back with one hand, squeezing Ruvik's arm. _Don't_ , he did his best to convey. _Let me handle this._ "What about Joseph?"

"We'll figure something out, just the two of us."

"You can't help him," said Ruvik, though despite the defiance in his voice, he was careful to stay behind Sebastian. "You only broke free from Mobius' control with _my_ help."

"It's because of you that we're all in this mess at all!" Juli shouted. She cast a quick glance over her shoulder before turning her full attention back to Sebastian. "Sebastian, remember what he put us through in that fucking machine. You have to know better than anyone what he's capable of."

Sebastian gulped. His every memory from STEM was thick in his throat, but when he took a breath to speak, Ruvik leaned in closer against him. "I do know," he said. "And it's even worse than you're probably thinking, but I can't let you kill him!"

Juli's face screwed up, and her hands tightened around her handgun. Sebastian braced himself, but then she let her breath out, her arms dropping. "Shit," she muttered. She took one cramped hand of the pistol to rub her eyes. "Fucking shit."

Sebastian winced sympathetically as he holstered his weapon. "I know—everything's all fucked." He turned enough to offer Ruvik his elbow to lean on. "But I can explain everything once we're out of here."

Juli shifted her weight back and forth and looked to Dennis' body on the grass. The strength seemed to flee from her. "I can't go with you."

"What?" Sebastian glared at her in disbelief. "They haven't spotted us yet—we can still make it to the truck and—"

"I can't." Juli shook her head. "I might be myself now, but…they can still control me somehow." Her face crumbled with a pained expression. "I gave you up once already. Until I figure out how to break it, I'll just put you in danger."

"Kidman," Sebastian persisted as she retrieved Dennis' radio. "I'm not leaving you with those assholes any longer. What if they find out you let us go?"

Juli switched the radio on. "This is Kidman," she said, a little breathless but still determined. "Green is down. They're headed west—I think they're making a run for the subway."

"We're on our way," Joseph said over the radio, and Sebastian ground his teeth, ignoring Ruvik tugging at his jacket. "Keep eyes on him but don't get too close until we get there. He's not himself."

"We have to go," Ruvik said close to his ear. "Quickly."

Juli clipped the radio to her belt. "You have to go," she said. "I'll buy as much time for you as I can."

Sebastian shook his head, but he didn't know what else to do. "Wait," he said, even as he secured the duffel across his shoulders, readying for another run. "Wait, at least tell us—"

"She already did," Ruvik interrupted. "I know where they are." He hooked his arm around Sebastian's elbow and pulled. "Sebastian, _please_."

Sebastian had plenty more to say, but by then Juli had already turned and was running from them. He had no choice but to let Ruvik spur him back on their original course. "They're going to catch her this time," he said as they hurried south through the trees, toward the side lot they'd parked in. "They'll turn her back into one of them."

"We can't worry about that now."

The truck was where they had left it, but there was a squad car parked at the entrance of the lot. Officers Chung and Hudson were inside, their eyes on the streets. Both of them were a little too familiar with Sebastian for him to want to risk being spotted by them. "Shit," he muttered. There were people in the lot as well, and even if he and Ruvik could sneak along the cars to their truck unseen by the officers, someone was sure to think them suspicious. "They must have all heard about that agent you killed in the alley. The whole downtown will be locked up pretty soon."

He looked to Ruvik for suggestions, and then shook his head when he saw the headphones coming back on. "Ruvik, no. You're gonna—"

"We don't have a choice," said Ruvik. The telltale hum of his mind rippled outward, rattling along Sebastian's nerves with a definite feel of exhaustion. But even so, every person in the lot stopped what they were doing and turned their backs to the pair. Officer Chung shifted gears and drove away, sirens blaring, toward where they had left Dennis' body.

Sebastian and Ruvik hurried to the truck. Once inside the cab, their duffel stowed behind the seats, everything finally slowed down. With a deep breath, Sebastian started the truck and very casually steered them out of the lot. He headed south, into the side streets where traffic would be lighter and there'd be fewer minds to distract his comrade with.

"Okay," he said, sagging into his chair. Though he was eager to put his foot to the floor, they didn't seem to be drawing any attention and he knew to keep it that way. "Okay, I think…we made it."

He glanced over and winced; Ruvik's eyes were locked in an empty glare on the glove box, and he was chewing on his fingers. "Hey," said Sebastian. He pushed the headphones down and then took Ruvik's hand away from his teeth, squeezing it. "Hey, you can stop now. We're all right."

Ruvik squeezed him back but continued chewing on his other hand. "I need a moment," he mumbled.

"I told you so," said Sebastian at last, but it didn't feel as vindicating as he'd hoped it would. Though he wanted to be angry, it kept slipping into something more ragged. "You're always pushing yourself too far. This isn't STEM—you're not fucking God. When are you going to figure out your own limits?"

Ruvik scowled around his knuckles, blinking rapidly; he was having trouble focusing. "I saved our lives," he retorted. "If I'd done nothing, they'd have us in a cell next to your partner by now."

It was Sebastian's turn to scowl, but he had no comeback to go with it. He couldn't stop thinking about how helpless he had felt in the alley, Joseph on the other end of a gun with Ruvik of all people standing in his defense. As he struggled to keep his wits together, he glanced to the rearview mirror, paranoid of seeing black vehicles in pursuit. What he found was a ghost of Leslie Withers in the back seat.

Sebastian's grip tightened on both the steering wheel and Ruvik's hand, but aches in his knees reminded him not to hit the brakes. He looked from Leslie to the man in the front seat bearing his face and back again as goose bumps crawled up his arms. Leslie looked just how Sebastian had seen him last: pale, bruised, still dressed in his hospital garb. But his eyes were heavy with malice that the real Leslie had never displayed, while at the same time glossy with hurt Ruvik couldn't have mustered.

Sebastian licked his lips. "Ruvik?"

"I miscalculated," Ruvik was muttering around his fingers. "The transmitter increased my range tenfold…but not my stability. It's made me more vulnerable than ever. I should have anticipated…."

"Does that have something to do with why Leslie is following us?"

Ruvik went rigid. "Leslie." His gaze swiveled toward Sebastian. "You can see _Leslie_ , himself?"

"He's right behind us." Sebastian glanced to the mirror again. "Sitting in the…."

Leslie was gone. Sebastian breathed a sigh of relief, but then Ruvik's hand began shaking in his. He knew what it meant and he was already swearing before he looked and found Ruvik collapsing against the dashboard. "I told you," he said again as he grabbed Ruvik by his collar, dragging him back into his seat. His eyes were rolled back and his joints were stiff in the grip of a familiar seizure. "I fucking told you so!"

Ruvik was too far gone to reply. Sebastian stopped the truck and turned toward him, but pinching and squeezing his hand didn't seem to help at all. "Ruvik, I swear to God," he growled, shaking him. "Wake the fuck up!"

A car behind them laid on the horn. Sebastian jumped, checking to make sure it wasn't another Mobius vehicle. Two angry teens in a compact gestured at him to keep it moving, and he was nearly frayed enough by then that throwing the truck into reverse and running them over was tempting. _Just go_ , he told himself, putting his foot back on the gas. He wound his fingers in Ruvik's hood and drew him down to his lap to at least keep his head from knocking around. _Go back to the apartment—be safe. There's nothing you can do for him like this._ He bit his lip until it throbbed. _Don't speed, don't run the light. Just get there. He'll wake up just like before—he'll be fine._

***

When news of a second shooting incident reached the KCPD police scanner, Joseph broke away from the rest of his peers. By the time he arrived at the scene, Officer Chung had succeeded in blocking off half the area while her partner kept the few civilians that had heard the shot at bay. "Broad daylight," a man was saying to another, both of them wearing the nametags of a nearby deli. "How does something like this happen?" Joseph set his jaw and moved on.

The body was lying on its side in the grass, shot dead by a bullet through his left temple. As Joseph drew closer he could smell the blood. It had taken him years on the job to get used to that smell, but after being bathed in gore time and time again inside the STEM, it hardly fazed him. He had met Dennis just before they all headed out together, but he couldn't say that he knew the man well enough to mourn him, either. For the first time at a crime scene, it was knowing the killer that turned his stomach.

"Detective Oda," said Officer Hudson. "I'm glad you're here." He glanced past him. "Who's this?"

Joseph glanced back; he'd almost forgotten that Tatiana was still with him. "She's with the FBI," he said. "She might be able to identify the body."

Tatiana moved to the body and couched down by his head, though she was careful not to get too close. "Yes, he's one of ours," she said. The grief in her voice was so subtle that others might have missed it, but not Joseph. "Were there any witnesses?"

"Not to the shooting itself," Hudson reported, flipping through his notepad. "But these men—" he nodded toward the deli workers "—said they came out the back and saw two men flee the scene."

It was nothing Joseph hadn't expected, but looking over the bloody scene and imagining Ruvik running off, Sebastian at his heels, set frustrating gnawing through his chest. "Then it's the same two responsible for the alley shooting," he hear himself say. "They were trying to double back to their vehicle."

"They must have changed their mind after Agent Green here caught up," added Tatiana as she pushed to her feet. "Our agents will catch up to them in the subway."

Joseph shook his head. "No. Sebastian knows this city better than anyone. We've already lost him."

Hudson glanced between them with wide eyes. "Detective Castellanos?" he said. "He's involved with this?"

Joseph tried not to wince. "Can you give us a moment, please?"

"Yeah, of course."

Hudson nodded and left to rejoin his partner. Joseph sighed as he watched the man whisper something in Chung's ear. "Plenty of us saw him at the precinct," he said. "And now the rumors will spread. The captain will have no choice but to issue a warrant."

"Your partner is certainly a force to be reckoned with," said Tatiana. "We need KCPD's resources to track him down."

"But it's not his fault—it's _Ruvik_ , and no one's going to believe it. If only we could have brought them in quietly…." Joseph looked again to the body and shuddered. "It's going to eat him up when he snaps out of it and realizes what Ruvik made him do."

Tatiana cast him a measuring look. "You feel guilty about Lusche and Ramirez, don't you?"

Joseph narrowed his eyes on the blood seeping through the grass. "I know what Ruvik's capable of," he said, remembering all too well the sensation of another set of nerves twisting like vines over his own. "I should have seen it coming. I should have given Ramirez time to—"

"If you had hesitated, Ruvik would have killed you," Tatiana said firmly. "And Granger, and then Ramirez anyway. You did the right thing." When Joseph didn't answer right away, she added, "Would you rather let Castellanos have _your_ blood on his hands, too?"

"No," Joseph said quickly. "No, you're right." He caught Hudson watching them and waved for him to come back over. "We need to get them both off the streets before Ruvik gets even more powerful."

"Yes, Detective?" Hudson said as he approached, trying to look merely curious, but he was clearly on edge.

"I need you to get on the radio," Joseph said, as much as the words hurt on the way out. "Let everyone know our suspect is a white male in his early twenties, blonde, very pale, last seen wearing a white hoodie and jeans. He'll be with Detective Castellanos."

***

By the time they reached the apartment building, Ruvik had stopped shaking and was quiet. Sebastian knew better than to think it was a good sign. He shoved his door open, but the moment he tried to put weight on his leg climbing out, his knee buckled and he had to grab hold of the cab to keep from collapsing. _This fucking leg_ , he thought, grinding his teeth as pure stubbornness propelled him around to the passenger side. _It's never going to heal with what I put it through_.

"Ruvik?" He opened the door and drew Ruvik to him—eyes partially open but still unconscious. It was broad daylight, and with Ruvik incapacitated he had no way of concealing them, but staying out in the open wasn't an option. With a deep breath, Sebastian hauled Ruvik over his shoulder. The extra weight made his leg ache so badly he saw stars, but he shut the door and hurried to the building's entrance.

Getting inside was enough of a challenge. When Sebastian got the stairs he was sweating, and even with one hand clenched on the railing he only made it up a few steps before he dropped with a thud. _Crawl_ , he told himself fiercely, growling against Ruvik's side. _Crawl if you have to, just get inside._ As he forced his legs beneath him, he heard a door on the first floor open. Footsteps approached, and Sebastian froze, only to realize it was Bre staring up at him.

Her eyes went wide. "Cas? What in the—"

"I need a favor," Sebastian interrupted. He gave his keys a shake and then tossed them to her. "The red truck out there—there's a bag in the back seat. Can you bring it up?"

Bre caught the keys, but she didn't stop staring at him. "What'd you do to your witness?"

"Please, Bre," said Sebastian, and without waiting for a reply and gripped the handrail with both hands and continued up the stairs.

He heard the front door open and close. Bre caught up with him at the door to the apartment, and she let them inside. "Is he all right?" she asked as Sebastian limped to the sofa. "There's blood."

Sebastian tried to ease Ruvik onto the sofa, but he was all out of strength, and they ended up both tumbling onto the cushions together. "He had a seizure," Sebastian confessed as he settled Ruvik on his back. "He's been unconscious since."

"Jesus." Bre set the duffel by the table and came to help. Together they freed the headphones and its cords from Ruvik's hoodie, then tugged the entire garment off. "Should I call an ambulance?"

"No." Sebastian wrestled out of his jacket and noticed Bre eyeing his holster. "No, we can't."

"What about Camilla?" Bre asked on her way to the kitchen. "I know you don't want anyone to know you're here, but—"

"No," Sebastian said quickly. He sat on the edge of the sofa and leaned over Ruvik, smoothing his hair from his face. "This isn't his first—he'll be all right." The glint of Ruvik's unfocused eyes was starting to creep him out, so he gently closed his eyelids. "Hear that, you little shit?" he whispered.

Bre returned with a damp rag and a glass of water, and Sebastian helped himself to a drink while she cleared the remaining blood from his nose and chin. "He's so pale," she said. "You're really sure? You know you can trust Camilla."

"I don't want to involve anyone else." Sebastian set the glass down and then eased Bre back. "Even you. You should go."

Bre looked like she had more to say, but she swallowed it back. "All right," she said, straightening up. "If you change your mind, you know where to find me."

Once she had left, Sebastian turned his full attention back to Ruvik. "Okay," he said, preparing himself. "It's time for you to wake up."

He tried biting Ruvik's hand, teeth digging into the meat of his palm below his pinky. Ruvik didn't stir. He tried pinching the underside of his upper arm, twisting the delicate skin there between three fingers, but still no reaction. When he had his nerves, he tried slapping Ruvik across the face.

 _So much for pain being the answer._ There were other things he could have tried, but for all his taunting, the thought of scarring Ruvik in his sleep wasn't a pleasant one. He kept still for a while, just watching and listening to Ruvik breathe, as if the rhythm would give him some clue on how to proceed. _He did say that he was unconscious for hours after one of these,_ he thought, feeling out Ruvik's pulse at his neck. _It doesn't mean he's in trouble, necessarily. He could just wake up._ His own heart beat a little faster as he remembered the heavy look in Leslie's eyes moments before the fit started; for some reason, it made him think of thick, black tentacles between his fingers. _But if those fucking headphones made him more vulnerable, and he's being attacked, unable to get back to his body...._

Sebastian leaned down. He took a fistful of Ruvik's hair and kissed him, hard and heavy just like early that morning. He bit Ruvik's lip and then soothed it with another kiss.

Ruvik didn't move. The shallow pace of his breath didn't change, and as Sebastian leaned back, he felt like a fool for even attempting it. _Did you really think that would work?_ he thought. _Are you Prince Charming, you asshole?_ He drew his hands to Ruvik's shoulders and wanted to shake him all over again. _All you can do is wait._

A minute passed, then two. Desperation started to sink in. Sebastian leaned into Ruvik's side and didn't know what to do with himself. Reason told him to be patient, to curl up and get some sleep while he could, but he couldn't get the black mass out of his head—he felt as if it was already in the room with them, and he found himself rubbing and scratching at Ruvik's scalp. He couldn't just sit and do nothing. Ruvik was in trouble, and without him, everything they had attempted would be over.

Then Sebastian's eyes fell on the headphones.

 _No, that's a terrible idea_ , he thought. He grabbed them up, following the connecting cable down to the control switch Ruvik had kept in his pocket. _He said you 'might' be able to use them. Might._ He put them on, stretching them down to fit his ears. _He knew what he was doing and these things might have killed him. This is a shit idea._

Sebastian took Ruvik's hand; his own was so clammy that Ruvik felt warm by comparison. "You promised you'd help me take down Mobius," he said, trying to focus on his anger more than the very real fear pulsing beneath it. "I'm not letting you off the hook this easy." Before he could change his mind, he flipped the switch.


	11. Chapter 11

Ruvk couldn't open his eyes. He could hear people shuffling about in the dark around him, smell and taste bitter antiseptic in the air, but his skin was utterly numb and he couldn't open his eyes. They were just so heavy. _Everything_ was heavy. But then a set of fingers pinched his eyelids open and secured them with tape, and once his sight started to adjust to the fluorescents overhead, he knew where—and when—he was.

_No, no._ Ruvik looked left and right, his extraocular muscles seemingly the only ones still capable of conscious control. His eyes watered beneath the glare of the lights but he could still make out the figures in their lab coats, preparing instruments. _No, not here. Not this_. He spotted Tatiana and there stopped. _Not again_.

She was dressed in her surgery scrubs, Anvi at her side, and she was contemplating a scalpel. When she noticed Ruvik watching her, she offered a smile. "Ahh, looks like you're conscious after all," she said as she came closer. "There's no need to worry, 'Dr.' Victoriano." She pulled his bottom lip down with her thumb and ran her nail across his gums to be sure he would feel it. "I'm using one of your concoctions, just like you showed me."

Ruvik's breath heaved through his nose, but he couldn't get his body to obey enough to bite back let alone speak. They hadn't even bothered to restrain him. All around the men and women huddled closer for their view of the spectacle he was about to become while Tatiana took center stage. He knew very well what came next, and he quaked beneath the potency of his own drugs even as he willed himself not to fear. He had suffered this fate before. The agony of piercing light was one of his most well-worn tools—it was foolish for him to cower in the face of it. But as Tatiana announced that the operation was about to begin, he did cower.

_Maybe Sebastian will wake me up again_ , he thought desperately as the scalpel eased into his chest. _Like before_.But then he remembered the twisted expression that had been fixed on him in the rain. _No, he won't. This is the chance he was hoping for._

His charred skin didn't register the sting of the blade at first. It wasn't until Tatiana reached muscle that pain seared up his nervous system, and even then, Ruvik found himself distracted by something not of his memory: a sharp tug against his ankles. A heavy pressure slithered up his calves, his knees, his thighs. As Tatiana and Anvi dragged the flesh from his rib cage, the weight reached his stomach, and finally he could see the blackened mass that had been hunting him, its slick tendrils gleaming in the light.

_Leslie...?_ Ruvik's throat ached with the effort of speech, but only a fragile gurgle came out of him. _No, no, that's not—not like this._ Tatiana reached into his chest cavity, slicing the organs free to be passed to her assistants, carrying on as if she didn't see the creature. Every slice and snip rocked him, but it was the creature's tentacles swelling to occupy the freed spaces that had Ruvik choking. Blood overtook all his senses, followed by the squirming intrusion of tangled limbs. Bit by bit, he was replaced.

_Sebastian!_ Ruvik wailed with all he had left. Once Tatiana had ripped his Aorta free the creature stretched up his throat, into his sinuses. He could feel it wrapping around his brain, pushing against the backs of his eyes. _Sebastian, please!_

And then he was adrift. The pain sharpened into blinding light and a fierce, throbbing whine, until everything grew white and then abruptly dark again. He waited in the formless gloom for the familiar rhythm of STEM to claim him, but then...nothing. There were no lights waiting for him in the distant black. There were no memories to be plundered, no ghosts to make slaves of. There was only a cramped, weightless abyss, swaying nauseatingly all around him. He had no arms to beat against the walls of his prison, no voice to cry out with. He was utterly alone.

***

Sebastian flipped the switch.

Nothing seemed to happen at first. He didn't even hear the terrible noise he was so accustomed to and had been expecting. Ruvik slept on, unmoving, their surroundings unchanged. Only the air seemed to grow hotter, but he assumed that was his imagination as he grew more desperate.

"Come on, Ruvik," Sebastian said, squeezing Ruvik's hands. "At least give me a hint."

Something bubbled up from the carpet by Sebastian's foot, and as soon as he looked, five impossibly long fingers wrapped tightly around his leg. They yanked, dragging him through the floor, through empty space. The world spun and he landed flat on his back on cold tile, the gun in his jeans digging into his kidney. Groaning and disoriented, he waited until he had most of his breath back before rolling onto his hands and knees, and from there, pushing himself upright.

"Fantastic," he muttered, glaring at the mangled reception hall of Beacon Mental Hospital. "Here again."

It wasn't quite the same as Sebastian remembered from either of his visits. Rotten blood stained the floors, chairs, and walls, but the bodies were gone. The ground seemed to be moving very slowly beneath his feet, and the light emanating from the few intact bulbs was a sickly, fleshy red, reminding him of the room of eyes and organs. He took a few cautious steps forward and found himself sweating almost immediately in the unnatural heat.

"Ruvik?" Sebastian checked his two guns—at least both were still loaded. Even more promising was that his leg wasn't a throbbing mess in the dreamworld. He made his way toward the security room, rubbing his ears. _The headphones didn't carry over. So much for having an easy way out of here._ "Ruvik! Are you here?"

The monitors in the security room were dark. Sebastian absent-mindedly touched the screen, remembering a pixelated vision of a streaking, deadly figure. _This is where you met_ , he thought, the hairs on the back of his neck standing on end. _How it all started. God damn, it feels so long ago now._

"Sebastian?"

He whirled, startled but relieved at the sight of a familiar figure standing in the doorway. "Ruvik." His shoulders sagged. "Thank God. I thought...."

Sebastian looked again. He had gotten so used to the youthful face, but the man's shoulders were hunched, feet turned in toward each other, hair tousled and almost pure white. Only the suspicion in his pale eyes was anything like the Ruvik that had served as his companion for the past several days. Sebastian gulped, mind straining for comprehension. "Leslie...?"

Leslie ducked deeper into his shoulders, and when Sebastian took a step forward, he disappeared, flickering back into existence further within the reception hall. Sebastian followed. "Leslie, wait," he said, even though he had no idea what he was doing or what he should say. "Please, you remember me, don't you? I won't hurt you."

Again Leslie retreated, and again Sebastian followed, until they were in the center of the room. " _Wait_ ," Sebastian said again, and he stopped himself from trying to venture any closer. "Please. Do you remember me? It's Sebastian."

Leslie nodded, though there was no happy recognition in his face, only distrust. He scraped his feet together. Sebastian waited to see if he would speak, but when nothing followed, he tried something else. "Do you know where Ruvik is?" he asked. "I have to find him."

Leslie scowled at him and disappeared again, and though Sebastian turned about in search, he didn't reappear. The atmosphere seemed to swelter in the wake of his departure. "Leslie!" Sebastian called after him. "Wait! You....shit." He rubbed his face and tried to shake off a feeling of déjà vu.

_If this is really Leslie, has he been trapped in Ruvik's mind all this time?_ He headed for the western door, figuring he might as well try his luck at the lighthouse tower first. _You've known from the beginning that he's been hiding something from you. What if Leslie is really still alive in here? What if you could give him his body back?_ The doors were hot beneath his palms, and he had to put the strength of his shoulders into opening them. _What if you could undo what Ruvik's done to him?_

__

Sebastan cast the doubts from his mind before they could fester; all that mattered in that moment was finding Ruvik.

The doors swung open, and Sebastian could see the hallway beyond leading to the elevator. The moment he stepped through, however, he was somewhere else. Grass crunched beneath his feet and the walls rippled apart, replaced with open air and a night sky. The heat reversed so abruptly that Sebastian shivered with goose bumps. It smelled like autumn. Dead leaves swirled at his ankles as he turned back and forth, taking in an empty field and distant woods. Not even the door he'd stepped through remained.

"Ruvik, this isn't cute anymore!" Sebastian shouted, but then the tall grass rustled nearby, and he shut his mouth. He expected grey-skinned zombies to creep out from behind the crumbling rock wall, but when reeds swayed, hiding a creature close to the ground, he began to sweat all over again. Even though the country landscape bore a strong resemblance to Ruvik's Elk River nightmare, something about the wind through half-empty branches felt wrong.

_More wrong than STEM_ , Sebastian thought, catching a glimpse of slick, black flesh shuffling to his left. _That's really something_. He drew his revolver, tracking the creature with his ears more than his eyes. _Ruvik isn't in control here._

The creature abruptly headed toward him, and he turned, making sure he had a shot before pulling the trigger. His caution paid off and the creature screeched, its thick blood splurting across the grass. But before Sebastian could celebrate that brief victory, a second creature attacked him from behind. Tendrils jabbed into the backs of his knees. He stumbled, and though he managed to stay on his feet at first, another of the slimy beasts latched its wormlike appendages onto his left wrist.

"Fuck!" Sebastian shot it off, but there were more writhing about in the grass, maybe even a dozen. He continued to pull the trigger until the hammer clicked into an empty chamber. It was like ringing the fucking dinner bell, and the creatures rushed him, their combined weight toppling him to his hands and knees.

"Get off!" he hollered, jabbing at the oozing masses with the butt of his gun and clawing with his fingernails. "Get the fuck off of me!"

One slithered up his back. Sebastian's pulse careened into panic as the tentacles wrapped around the crown of his head and began pulling at his scalp, too similar to its attempt on Ruvik at Beacon. He punched and tore at the thing, but in his distraction the remaining creatures rocked him off his balance, and suddenly he was on his back, heavy weight against his chest and hard, _human_ fingers clenched around his throat. As he fought back with weakening strength, he could have sworn Leslie was squirming among the chaos, his teeth bared.

"R-Ruvik!" Sebastian choked out, trying to reach for the second gun still tucked in his pants. "Where the fuck are you!"

The hissing and wailing of the creatures was drowned out abruptly by an even louder voice—a woman's voice, bellowing like a vengeful banshee. Sebastian's vision had begun to swim but there was no mistaking the charred face and black hair that streaked overhead, and a moment later the tentacles were ripped from him. One by one, clawed hands wrenched the leeches free. Their slime clung to Sebastian's skin. As soon as enough of them had been flung aside, he rolled onto his stomach and crawled. The grass beneath his fingers turned to metal, the cool autumn air boiled into steam, and by the time he was far enough away from the ongoing battle he was butting up against the stone wall of Beacon's boiler room. He put his back to it and watched the screaming ghost rip and smash each black coil into fleshy pulp.

Sebastian holstered his empty gun and hastily drew his spare, his eyes never leaving the burned and misshapen figure of a woman scuttling from one kill to the next. Once his attackers had been reduced to a collection of quivering muscles, Laura turned, her hair sticking to her face and neck. It took only seconds for her to reach him, blocking him in with her extra limbs. He had his gun up—he pressed the muzzle to her throat—but then she stopped, and so did he.

Up close, she was heart-breakingly hideous. Sebastian could smell the fire on her rotting skin and it threatened to turn his organs inside out. Her hair fell around him in a curtain and he didn't dare breathe for fear of getting a taste of it against the corner of his mouth. Even so, he ached. He understood better than ever how and why the nightmare had birthed her, and he stared into her peeling face. Maybe she had been a daughter once, a sister. Maybe she was more chimera than ghost. But she hadn't killed him yet, so he took in a careful breath. "Laura?"

Her head twitched with the name, and he couldn't help but flinch in reply. "Laura," he said again anyway. "I don't...I'm not going to hurt you." Though there was a good chance he was about to find himself eviscerated, he lowered his gun. "I need to find your brother."

Laura considered that for a long moment, still twitching. Just when Sebastian was bracing himself for her claws, she rocked back on her heels and then stood. For the first time she appeared graceful as her long body unfolded, arms stretching down at her sides, long black hair modestly covering her body. At her full height she towered over him like a weathered statue. Though the gleam of her eyes through tattered locks would definitely haunt him, she made no move to stop him from climbing carefully to his feet. She only watched.

_What if she heard what you said about her?_ Sebastian thought out of nowhere as he regained his balance. _That thing about being a hell-beast?_ He gulped, but still she merely stared at him with no indication of an incoming attack. He decided to push his luck a little further. "Do you know where I can find him?" he asked.

Laura twitched. A bell chimed behind her, and when Sebastian looked, he saw that the boiler room wall had opened, revealing an elevator inside.

_It worked._ Sebastian kept an eye on Laura as he moved slowly around her, edging toward the elevator. _Not sure how, but it worked._ "Thank you," he said once he was stepping inside. It might have been a waste of sentiment, but better safe than sorry. "Thanks, Laura." Laura continued to face the wall even as the elevator doors closed him in.

It was taking him down. Sebastian gave himself a quick onceover as he prepared himself for whatever would be on the other side of the doors when they opened. Though bruised and battered by the creatures, he was relieved not to find any lacerations. At least the things didn't have the teeth of a subway fiend.

The air in front of him flickered, and Sebastian held very still as Leslie reappeared, as silent and accusatory as ever. He licked his lips. _Laura listened to you. Maybe he will, too?_ "Leslie," he said carefully. "I'm sorry I couldn't save you." The words were more true coming out than he'd expected, and his chest constricted around them. "I tried. But we can still figure this out, somehow. Just let me talk to Ruvik, and—"

"Sorry," Leslie interrupted, the sharp animosity of his voice giving Sebastian a chill. "You're sorry."

Sebastian gathered himself up, but before he could even think of a way to reply, the elevator doors parted, and Leslie's apparition was scattered by the muscular arm that reached through the opening. Thick, gloved fingers grabbed Sebastian by his gun harness and hauled him out of the box, into the blackened and crumbling front hall of the Victoriano Estate.

Sebastian landed on his side amidst the ashes. He twisted, trigger squeezed before he was even sure of what he was firing at. Three rounds burrowed into the broad chest of a familiar enemy, a fourth glancing off the iron safe atop his shoulders, but they didn't stop his momentum. The mallet was already in full swing.

Solid metal struck Sebastian's outstretched arm. He felt each point connect, breaking skin and spreading cracks through the bones beneath. The impact was so great it tossed him across the floor, and he tumbled helplessly, arm broken and flailing until he skidded to a halt at the base of the stairs. As he groaned and struggled against the splintered floor, the smell of blood took him back to the last time he had crumpled there, his life pumping out of his shredded throat and thigh.

_Is this whole nightmare supposed to be a nostalgia trip?_ Sebastian thought, teeth clenched as his entire arm went numb. He could see bone poking out at the elbow, and when he looked beyond, The Keeper was stalking toward him. _Fuck that. This place couldn't kill you before—it's not about to now. Get up._

Sebastian got his knees beneath while The Keeper lifted his mallet again. He leapt clear just as a heavy swing demolished the banister post, spraying wood and soot in all directions. _This isn't real,_ Sebastian told himself as he clambered upright and raced back toward where his revolver had fallen. _You're not in this fucking mansion, you're on a couch with those stupid headphones on._ He snatched up the gun is his left hand, and though he wasn't nearly as good a shot with it, he put every bullet he had left in the back of The Keeper's neck.

The beast stumbled, blood running down his shoulders, but the wounds seemed to anger him more than anything. He wound his fingers in the burlap of his bloody sack and smacked the mallet against his skull with a sickening reverberation. Sebastian backed away, the revolver clicking emptily when he tried to shoot again.

_You're not out of bullets_. He took a deep breath, ignoring the crackles of pain in his shoulder, the thump of his dead hand against his leg as he continued to put distance between him and his enemy. _There were never bullets to begin with, because this is not real. Remember what Ruvik said?_ He aimed for The Keeper's chest just above the apron. _You can take control here._

Sebastian pulled the trigger. The gun recoiled and a hole carved into The Keeper's sternum, but they both knew a couple more .38's wasn't going to do any good. _Do better_ , Sebastian thought as The Keeper lumbered toward him. _Your arm's not broken—use it._ He breathed through his teeth and shook himself, willing feeling back down into his mangled elbow. Pain flared through his crushed nerves, but then even that was driven out as he forced both hands to the gun. _Remind him what the .50 cal tastes like._

The Keeper drew his arm back, and Sebastian diverted his aim just enough to get extending muscles in his sight. When he squeezed again, the kick shuddered through his wrists and the report thundered against his ears. _That_ , The Keeper felt; his armpit split open, and his arm wheeled back, the weight of the mallet dragging it down.

Sebastian seethed with a rush of accomplishment. He shot again, rendering the limb completely immobile before turning on the other. The Keeper tried to wield the grotesque sack, but two Magnum bullets to the wrist severed enough tendons that he couldn't keep its grip on it. His kneecaps were next, shattered, dropping him to the floor with a thud that rattled the hall.

Sebastian pumped several more shots into The Keeper's chest and neck, his lips pulled back in a snarl. "Sorry, Buddy," he said as he holstered the Magnum. "I don't know if you're supposed to be someone, too, but you're in the way."

He pried the mallet from The Keeper's grip. It was as large as his torso and easily twice his weight, but he made himself believe that it didn't matter. His arm that had only moments ago been numb bore most of the burden, and with a growl he swung the pointed end into the back of The Keeper's neck. With a sick squelch the safe ripped free, but Sebastian didn't stop there: he flipped the weapon around went to work, denting and then cracking the metal beneath a series of punishing blows. Only when the safe door splintered open, oozing blood and brain matter, did he drop the mallet.

The hall fell quiet as Sebastian stumbled back. His feet tangled and he dropped on his ass, where he stayed, content to watch The Keeper bleed as he caught his breath. When he inspected his arm, he found his sleeve torn, blood on his skin, but no longer were there any broken, protruding bones. He fingered the point of his elbow to be sure and then pulled the revolver back out, inspecting it. It was back to being the .38 he'd been using since his promotion to sergeant.

"Mind over matter, huh," Sebastian mumbled, and he looked around at the hall. He could feel the air flexing in wait around him; the walls, the windows, the stairs, even the fallen Keeper tingled at his edges not unlike the glimmering minds of Krimson's youth, milling about outside a trendy downtown bar. Everything was within his grasp. He could mold it—he could _remake_ it.

Sebastian shook his head before he could go too far into speculation. _You're not here for that_ , he reminded himself, scraping his palm across his mouth. _That's not going to help you find Ruvik. Where the hell could he be?_

The safe creaked, and when Sebastian looked, it began to rock back and forth on the floorboards.

***

Ruvik drifted for what felt like ages. He tried to stay focused, painting the inside of his mind with vivid memories—horrific memories of organs being harvested, of his victims stretched out before him with gray matter exposed, of even the shrill scream of his sister's voice amidst crackling fire. He couldn't hold onto any of it. He had become complacent again, too attached to the ache of a heartbeat, to heat and sweat, to pain both fierce and subtle gnawing at his edges. He didn't remember what it meant to rule an abyss, let alone one devoid even of strangers to inflict himself on.

He could feel his consciousness eroding. Bit by bit he was diffusing into the ether. Some part of him thought he ought to be impressed that a fate existed that still frightened him, but the more he wore thin, the more panicked he grew. He wasn't meant to end this way, alone and feeble, less than a shadow.

But then something intruded into his corner of space. Five seeking fingers found him, and all at once he had fingers to grip back with. Gravity reversed and he was being pulled free, the liquid of his surroundings giving way to metal scraping his shoulders and hips, and then empty air. Within moments he was whole again and collapsing into a familiar pair of arms.

"Ruvik!" Sebastian was wiping bloody slime from his face; he could feel the pressure against his cheek muscles, but his skin was all scars, denying him the rough texture of callouses and chipped fingernails. "Can you her me? Are you all right?"

Ruvik took in a breath and was startled by the coarseness of the air in his lungs. He coughed and sputtered as he got used to the sensation all over again. "Se…." Gradually he regained control of his limbs and senses, drawing into focus the mansion around them, the viscous goop he was slathered with, and most importantly, Sebastian's face hovering overhead. He blinked in confusion. "Sebastian?"

"Yeah, it's me." He coughed. "Christ, you smell terrible. How'd you get in there?"

"What?" Ruvik tried to sit up on his own, but the floor swerved beneath him, and he had to grab for Sebastian's arm. "I don't know," he said, just because it was easier than trying to figure out what he meant. He looked to the blood covering his hospital tatters and followed it back to the corpse of one of his monsters, lying beheaded with his safe cracked open.

_So, this is still my mind after all_ , he thought, not that it could have possibly been anywhere else. But something was wrong. He should have been able to sense every room in the mansion, their walls willing and eager to burst apart for him, the very laws of reality slave to his command. Instead, there was only a bloody hall, as foreboding and alien as when he was a boy. Everything swayed as if the house itself were drifting in the sticky ocean he'd just escaped. He couldn't help but shudder beneath the impossible weight of it. Only Sebastian was as alight, and Ruvik leaned into him, eager for stability. "What happened?"

Sebastian wrapped one arm behind Ruvik's back to help him up. "You passed out in the truck," he explained. "And when you wouldn't wake up, I thought you might be in trouble, so I came after you."

Ruvik frowned as an unfamiliar sensation clenched in his chest. "Why?" he asked, but he didn't like how his voice sounded then, so he shook his head and tried again. "How? How are you even here?"

Sebastian shrugged. "I'm not entirely sure. But I used your headphones."

Ruvik went rigid. "No," he said immediately, though it took him a moment to realize he'd spoken aloud. "No, you shouldn't have." He thought of Sebastian drifting alone in the deep as he had, aimless and drowning in bitter recollections, and his stomach turned. "It's not safe for you—you're not ready." He reached up, pushing at Sebastian's ears as if he could shove the device off him in the walking world.

"It's a little late for that." Sebastian took his wrists and urged them down. "Besides, I survived STEM once already. There's nothing left in this big ugly brain of yours that scares me, so let's just get the hell out of here and argue about it later."

Ruvik shook his head. "It's not like before," he said. The truth, _I don't have control here now_ , he couldn't bring himself to say. "I can't just wake us up."

"Figures. So what do we do?"

The floor was finally starting to stabilize, so Ruvik leaned back, freeing himself from the press of Sebastian's hand. "We have to find Leslie," he said.

Sebastian sat up straighter, and though Ruvik didn't look, he could clearly picture the judgment crossing his face. "You lied to me."

Ruvik watched the blood continuing to ooze out of The Keeper's fractured safe. "I didn't lie to you."

"You said that Leslie was gone," Sebastian insisted. "That he was dead, and—"

"He _is_ dead!" Ruvik snapped. "That thing isn't Leslie anymore, it's just…." His stomach was still turning, and he rubbed his mouth, disgusted with himself. "I told you before," he said, attempting a calmer tone. "What made Leslie _Leslie_ is dead—he's just bad data now. He's more _me_ than he is himself."

Sebastian continued to glare at him, and finally, Ruvik had to look. Even that much disappointment shouldn't have moved him, but it curdled the bile already in his throat and left him furious. "You really expect me to believe that?" said Sebastian. "After you've been hiding him from me all this time? _All_ people are 'bad data' to you."

"You don't understand." Ruvik got his feet beneath him and stood; his balance was frail at first, but he managed to be stable by the time Sebastian was beside him. "What's the point of telling you anything if you—"

" _Ruvik_." Sebastian grabbed him by the arm; he flinched. "The truth. Right now."

Ruvik stared back at him, unsteady anger burning behind his eyes. He suddenly didn't know if the emotion was all his, or if Sebastian's frustration and betrayal were merely seeping into him. The thought of anyone having that much power over him, even Sebastian—especially Sebastian—fractured his composure. "The truth," he repeated, and he thrust Sebastian's hand off him. "What does it even matter? The truth is _you need me_. Even if you killed me here, if Leslie could reclaim his body, what good would he be to you? Can Leslie Withers save your partner from Mobius, can he avenge your daughter?" Sebastian's expression hardened, but Ruvik carried on. "If he had survived the STEM instead of me, he would already be in their hands and you and Joseph would be dead. And _you know that_ , so stop wasting our time pretending you feel guilty about it."

Sebastian drew himself up, and Ruvik braced himself for an argument, but then he only folded his arms across his chest. He continued to glare with heated but restrained stubbornness, and as the seconds ticked by, it became clear he wasn't about to back down. Ruvik had to fight not to fidget beneath his unblinking attention. It was mysteriously unbearable.

"What do you want from me?" Ruvik demanded once it had become too much. "What are you hoping I'll say?"

"I already told you," replied Sebastian. "I want the truth, and neither of us is going anywhere until I get it."

"How can you be so…." Ruvik shook his head in frustration, but Sebastian was apparently unmovable, and the pressure of specimen fluid against the mansion's windows was gradually beating down his efforts at pride into a need to escape. His shoulders drooped in surrender.

"Leslie and I had a lot in common," he explained at last, but rather than relent, Sebastian only watched him more attentively than ever. "More than anyone realized. We shared many experiences which, when combined with his peculiar synesthesia, made us very compatible."

"What kind of experiences?" Sebastian asked.

Ruvik found his gaze being drawn to the body of The Keeper again. "Childhood," he said. "I didn't realize at first because it wasn't in Jimenez's files concerning him, but in his mind, I saw his…loneliness, and isolation. His parents were ignorant rabble that didn't know how to raise a child as unique as him; they were neglectful and abusive, intolerant of his needs." An itch crept along his skin like a phantom pain, and he had to make fists to keep from reaching for his arms. "But still he desired their affection, desperately so, up until the end. He stood over them and watched them take their finals breaths. As I did mine."

He glanced up, but when he saw the look of mixed dread and sympathy Sebastian was fixing him with, he had to turn away again before he could carry on. "When Mobius left me no other choice, I took him. I erased from him everything that I could, but...." He worked his jaw distastefully against the words. "Evidently certain memories and emotions of his remained."

Sebastian hummed thoughtfully. "I guess it's hard to erase something that reminds you of yourself."

He didn't like that thought. It rattled about in his skull and he was overly eager to be rid of it. "There's no such thing as a soul," he said pointedly. "Whatever it is you've seen or heard, the Leslie that exists here isn't a real, living person. It's corrupted data—it's fragments of the experiences we shared, shaped by _my_ biases and perceptions of him. It's...." He grumbled to himself and finally shared his full confession. "Like I told you already, it's the fear we held, that whatever frail connections we formed, no matter what we earned or gained for ourselves, in the end everything we cared for would be taken from us again. Well, I _took_ from him. And now he's doing the same to me because it's what I expect of him. _Now_ do you understand?"

"Yeah," said Sebastian. "I get it." He sounded gentler than a moment ago, and Ruvik wasn't sure if he ought to be grateful or hate him for it. "He's just like Laura."

Ruvik shuddered, glaring back at him. "Take that back."

"You said before we have ghosts that live only in our minds, right?" he carried on. "There's no real Laura here, either, it's just your memories of her—"

"Shut up," Ruvik hissed.

"—that you've let become as twisted and bitter as you are because you _expect_ her to blame you for—"

"Shut up!"

Ruvik grabbed at his arms. He didn't know what he intended to do, as even in his original body Sebastian had height and weight over him. He just wanted him to _stop_ , and he did, though a moment later he realized it was because the entire mansion hall had begun to groan and shudder around them. The floorboards rattled and the stone walls ground against each other in complaint. Both of them went very still as they glanced to each corner of the room, wary of a collapse or even an invasion.

"Looks like we'll have to settle this later," said Sebastian. "Do you know where we can find this not-Leslie of yours?"

Ruvik let go of Sebastian and straightened up. "No. We could try his room at Beacon, but I'm not sure that I can take us there."

"Guess it's up to me, then."

Ruvik frowned, watching uneasily as Sebastian moved to stand in front of the hall's man entrance. "What are you doing?"

Sebastian grasped the door handles with both hands and took a deep breath. Just when Ruvik was about to scold him for being foolish, the air around him quivered. The mansion smeared and a ripple passed through the old walls. Ruvik felt it echo through him and we left breathless. When Sebastian flung the doors open, what lay beyond was not the rotting lane that led to his childhood home, but Beacon's bloody reception hall.

"I fucking hate this place," said Sebastian, but he stepped through anyway.

Ruvik followed, eager to close the doors behind them, though even afterward he could still hear the mansion groaning. "How did you do that?" he demanded as the two of them headed for the west hall. "You brought us here—you can control the nightmare?"

"Don't sound so shocked," said Sebastian, striding without concern through the crusty red stains covering the floor. "You're the one who said I had potential."

"But you shouldn't be…." Ruvik clamped his jaws shut. _You shouldn't be more powerful here than I am._ Sebastian inclined his head, waiting for him to finish, but he couldn't. "It's dangerous," he said instead. "What if you're losing the connection to your body, like me? We could both end up trapped here."

Sebastian made a face as he shoved the hallways doors open. "All the more reason to get this over with as soon as we can."

The hallway stretched out before them, bathed in red-orange light from the noxious fluids that swashed up against the windows. Ruvik tried not to look, fearful that there might be faces peering back at him through the glass. As soon as they started toward the far exit, the doors to their right began to rattle and crack, as if there were creatures inside throwing themselves against the walls of their cells. Several of them appeared to be in danger of buckling under the repeating pressure. Sebastian drew both his handguns, but by the time he was offering one to Ruvik, it had become a rifle.

Ruvik hefted the weapon with a queasy feeling. "It worries me that you're finding this so easy now," he said.

Sebastian gave his revolver a shake, and within moments it had become a shotgun. "If you have a better idea, I'm all ears," he replied as he racked a shell into the chamber. 

The doors burst open, and all at once a horde of black, tentacled creatures surged toward them. Sebastian was more than ready for them. He leveled his shotgun and fired into the crowd ahead of them, severing limbs and splitting torsos. As he cleared a path Ruvik kept an eye behind them, picking off those that were fast enough to keep up. Between the two of them they had very little trouble navigating the assault, and were soon charging into an adjoining hall, on their way swiftly to the North Ward.

"You should know," Sebastian said once they'd finished fighting past another round of screeching tendrils, "it was Laura that helped me find you in here."

Ruvik's heart skipped, and he watched Sebastian's face closely to judge if he was being honest. "You saw her?"

"Yeah. Thought for a minute that she was gonna smash my face in." Sebastian paused long enough to put buckshot through another pair of creatures and then continued on. "But she saved my life, and she pointed me right to you, more or less."

They reached the entrance to the ward, giving Ruvik a moment to catch his breath while Sebastian got the doors open. He should have known better, but he asked, "Did she say anything to you?"

"Not exactly, no."

_Laura,_ Ruvik thought as they slipped inside. _I knew you were still here._ His hands clenched around the rifle. _You'll show yourself to him, but not to me?_

Sebastian stopped in his tracks, and Ruvik was so preoccupied that he bumped into him. "Cas?" Ruvik circled around to get a look at his face: Sebastian had his head turned and was staring down a hallway sectioned off from the ward by a barred gate. Recognition was emblazoned across his features, full of apprehension and confusion. "What is it?"

"Nothing, it's just…." Sebastian gave his own face a smack to jar himself from whatever spell had caught him. "I've been here," he explained. "This is where I met that nurse—that Mobius doctor. Gutierrez."

"Here?" Ruvik frowned at their surroundings. "Yes, I suppose she would have spent time here. I don't remember paying any attention to this place in STEM, though…."

He looked back to Sebastian and frowned again. His partner was as fearsome a sight as he had ever been, gun in hand and blood smearing his disheveled clothes. And though the broad span of his shoulders and the set of his jaw were stern, the cool and focused gleam of his eyes was very different from the world-weary detective that Ruvik had first set his sights on in the real Beacon. It made him itch all over again.

"You shouldn't be here," he said quietly. "You have too much to worry about already to have to be looking after me."

Sebastian raised an eyebrow; maybe he sensed something that was too close to an apology in the words. "In a weird way, I'm kind of glad this happened," he replied. "It's good to know that you actually do feel guilty about one of the shitty things you've done."

Ruvik bristled, and he tugged his hood up, stiff with blood as it was, on his way to the ward proper. "I don't feel guilty," he protested.

"Your own mind created a ghost of someone you killed, which is now trying to kill you back." Sebastian followed him down the line of iron-doored cells. "I'm not much of a metaphor guy, but that one is pretty damn clear."

"I don't feel guilty about killing Leslie. We've been over this." His shoulders squirmed with the weight of Sebastian's attention on him. "I just hate it when you look at me like that."

"What do you think guilt _is_?" Sebastian retorted, and suddenly Ruvik didn't know, and he couldn't answer.

They reached Leslie's room. The inside was dark, but soft, shuffling sounds were echoing out of the small window, and a voice whimpered. Ruvik put his hand to the knob. _If I had to do it all again,_ he told himself firmly, _I would still kill him._

He flung the door open, but what lay inside wasn't an asylum room and its occupant, but a stone staircase leading into the ground. As they headed down, it occurred to Ruvik that he knew where they were, and what was waiting for them. At the bottom of the stairs lay a short cellar hallway, and at the end, a doorway bathed in red light.

"I remember this, too," Sebastian said as Ruvik led the way toward the dark room. "Jimenez and I found Leslie down here."

"It's from one of his memories." There was a hum in the air, a heat that even Ruvik could sense. "He'll be here."

They reached the final room. Dim, crimson light cast shadows from the strings of half-developed photographs hanging from the ceilings, chemicals reeking from metal bins crowding the workstations. It may have been a familiar and even calming scene if not for the far wall, which was host to a plague: more of the sticky black creatures clung to its every surface, concentrated most heavily in the corner, where tendrils stretched forth like tree roots. The mass pulsed eerily, and the slapping of slithering of wet flesh gave an illusion of hissing curses.

Ruvik faced the growing mass determinedly, but when he glanced to Sebastian, he found his companion's face abnormally sympathetic given the task before them. "What do you see?" he asked.

"I see Leslie," said Sebastian, shaking his head. "And what I'm guessing are his parents."

He took Ruvik's hand, and suddenly he could see it, too. In the room's corner where the creatures were most densely packed, a pair of bloodied corpses huddled close together; the father had his throat slashed open, while the mother bore two deep stab wounds in stomach. Kneeling in front of them, his back turned to his visitor, was Leslie himself. Ruvik stared at his slumped shoulders and bowed head, remembering the last time he had seen that mess of white hair from the outside. He remembered Leslie's face upturned as he accepted his fate.

"He blamed himself," Ruvik said, eyelids drooping as the faces of Leslie's dead parents smeared across his vision. "More than I ever did, and I murdered mine on purpose. He had a startling capacity for guilt. Looking back, that's probably why he surrendered as easily as he did. Perhaps he felt he deserved oblivion at my hands."

Sebastian flinched and turned toward him. "What? You're not saying that Leslie, he…."

Ruvik stepped forward, tugging his hand free in the process. For a moment the vision of Leslie flickered as if it might go back to only the squirming cancer, but now that he knew what he was really looking for, the bloody scene drew back into focus. "Equal parts accident and self-defense," he said. "You wouldn't blame him, if you'd been there, if you'd known them. Not even the local police did. They protected him." He hefted the rifle, checking it for ammunition even though he knew the bullets didn't matter. "And so did I, for my part. But Leslie never did forgive himself. Poor little fool."

He moved close enough so that he could press the rifle's muzzle to the back of Leslie's skull. Leslie didn't move. It should have been a simple thing to pull the trigger and rid himself of the thing, but for some reason, hearing Sebastian's breath in the small room made him hesitate.

"I don't think that's going to work," said Sebastian.

Ruvik scowled, adjusting his grip. "Shut up," he muttered under his breath.

"You can't just kill off pieces of yourself, believe me."

"I can and I have," he retorted. "You merely lack the courage."

He fit his finger to the trigger, feeling the tension of it spread up his arm. Long before he was able to squeeze, however, Sebastian took his shoulder. "Ruvik," he said, low and close to his ear. "Take another look."

Ruvik did so, and when he blinked, the scene changed. It wasn't Leslie's parents sagging against each other, sealed together in bloody death—it was his. Ernesto and Beatriz Victoriano gazed up at him with empty eye sockets and mutilated, almost patchwork faces. It wasn't a rifle clutched in his shaking hands, it was a butcher's knife; it wasn't an underground studio, it was the master bedroom of a country mansion. It wasn't Leslie staring down at his gruesome work.

Then Ruvik blinked again, and all of it was gone. He was lying on his back on a lumpy sofa, an apartment ceiling overhead. His knees were sore from running and there was blood in his sinuses. Someone was bruising his fingers in a white-knuckled grip.

"Sebastian?" Ruvik squirmed; he was awake, but it still took time for proper feeling to make it back into all his limbs. His surroundings only came into total focus once his gaze landed on Sebastian, seated on the couch with him, head bowed and headphones still on. It gave him back his bodily control, and he pried his hands free so he could sit up and shove the device off Sebastian's ears. "Sebastian!"

Sebastian groaned, cramming his fists up against his eyes. " _Shit_." He didn't seem to notice as Ruvik unwound the headphones and their control piece from him and set them aside. "My _head_."

"Tell me what you're feeling," Ruvik ordered, not that he felt very stable himself. He wasn't sure exactly what had shook them free and it left him anxious about one more blink carrying them back behind his eyes. "Are you all right?"

"My head is killing me," Sebastian grumbled. "But the rest of me…." He lowered his hands, watching blearily as his fingers curled and straightened. "I feel fuzzy. Kinda tingly, like—"

Ruvik drew Sebastian's hand closer and bit down hard on the skin between thumb and forefinger; he startled and jerked back. " _Ow_ , Jesus, Ruvik!"

"Better?"

"Now my head _and_ my hand are killing me," Sebastian complained as he tried to shake the sting out. "Cut it out—I'm all right."

Ruvik continued to watch him, his breath held, until he was convinced that neither of them were about to start convulsing. "Was it you?" he asked at last, squeezing Sebastian's knee without really thinking about it. "You woke us up?"

Sebastian groaned and rubbed his eyes again. "I don't know," he said. "Just give me a second, all right?" He tugged clumsily at his gun holster. "My head's about to fall off—I need to lie down or something."

Ruvik unfastened the belts for him, easing the holster to the floor. He didn't have any intention of putting distance between them, so he tugged at Sebastian's shoulders to urge him forward. "Then come on; lie down."

Sebastian must have been as bad off as he claimed, because he crumbled into Ruvik's arms. He had trouble getting his legs onto the sofa, so he rolled onto his side, letting Ruvik prod them up with his foot. It wasn't until after a great deal of fumbling and a weary collapse that he seemed to realize where he was, sprawled across Ruvik's chest and between his legs, but by then exhaustion kept him from protesting. He relaxed with a heavy sigh.

"Let's not do that again," he mumbled.

Ruvik shivered at the breath passing over his collar. He told himself he only wanted Sebastian close to keep his own mind from drifting again into the abyss; it was difficult to even remember the sickly rocking with a warm, heavy body draped sturdily over his own, pressing him into the cushions. But as he wrapped his arms around Sebastian's neck, his chest thundered and ached. He didn't know what to think or how to act—he felt inexplicably tiny, and it frightened him.

He did know, however, that the last thing he wanted after all that was for Sebastian to be aware of his struggle. So he drew his fingers through man's coarse hair, scratching and massaging in hopes of easing his pains and distracting him from anything else. It worked; Sebastian sighed again, gently, and sank more deeply into him.

"I don't know what you did," Ruvik said, tugging lightly on different locks of hair. "But it worked."

"I don't know, either," replied Sebastian. "But you're welcome."

Ruvik grimaced and tried not to fidget. "I suppose we owe it to my transmitter. I didn't think it'd be so effective on you, with no prior experience." He swirled a fingertip around Sebastian's ear. "I wonder if my using my abilities on you so often has managed to alter your brain chemistry."

Sebastian grumbled against his chest. "Can you just keep doing what you're doing _without_ saying anything creepy or weird for a while?"

Ruvik closed his mouth. He continued to drag his fingertips across Sebastian's scalp, stroking his neck to discreetly gauge his pulse, but eventually the silence crept up on him. He couldn't just leave things as they were, in quiet, easy gratitude of having escaped. Nothing had been resolved; all he had were more questions, more confusion and anger. They circulated his lungs like prickling smoke.

"I thought you were going to let me die," he said. "After what you told me this morning."

Sebastian gulped, stalling. "So that's a 'no,' huh?"

"You were wrong, after all," Ruvik carried on. "You've had plenty of chances to kill me. You could have left me at the car crash, or let Kidman shoot me in the head." He squeezed the back of Sebastian's neck. "You could have choked the life out of me while I was comatose. It would have been easy."

Sebastian licked his lips, and after another long moment, he lowered his voice in resignation. "You don't have to worry about that," he said. "I'm not going to hurt you."

Ruvik imagined he should have felt a sense of relief; instead, his stomach caved in. His arms tightened and he wanted to dig his nails into Sebastian's flesh. "Of course not. You still need me to save your partner."

"It's not just that." Sebastian shifted, but if he was thinking about putting space between them, Ruvik held him tightly until he gave up. "At this point, we've been through so damn much together, if you just went and died it'd be...a waste. I don't want that."

"A waste," Ruvik echoed, unsatisfied.

"Hell, maybe I'm just sick of losing things," Sebastian admitted. "Even if it is a creepy little shit like you."

Ruvik snorted, but at least Sebastian's jabs were easier to tolerate than his attempts at sincerity. He went back to stroking and plucking at his hair, willing the strange tension to fade from between his ribs. It didn't cooperate as much as he'd hoped.

After a few minutes, Sebastian began to squirm again. "My arm is falling asleep."

Ruvik tensed, only to realize how childish it must have seemed. He let go to give them enough room to maneuver. But as he wormed free, and Sebastian rolled onto his back, he changed his mind. Once Sebastian had settled, Ruvik stretched out over him, tucking his nose very decidedly under his scruffy chin. The warmth of another living body was too much to give up when he was still so fragile.

Sebastian prodded only just enough to get any pressure off his healing leg, but otherwise he didn't fight. He even let his arm fall across Ruvik's back to steady him in place. "Are you all right?" he asked. "You're shaking."

"No, I'm not," Ruvik muttered. He burrowed in deeper and squeezed his eyes shut. "I'm fine; I'm only tired."

"What was going on in there before I found you?"

"Nothing." It was truer and more intimidating than Ruvik wanted to admit, and he shoved his hands down between Sebastian and the cushions, like anchors. "There was just…nothing."

Remarkably, Sebastian understood. He gave the back of Ruvik's neck a slow, reassuring squeeze. "It's not over yet, is it?" he asked quietly. "We haven't seen the last of that thing."

"No," said Ruvik, but he didn't want to talk about it and earn any more of Sebastian's scorn or pity, so he changed the subject. "But at least we know now that you have some decent fortitude, mentally. It will come in handy if we're going to help your partner."

He felt when Sebastian's pulse stuttered. "Tell me we really can save him."

"We can." Joseph wasn't Ruvik's favorite subject, either, but at least it would keep Sebastian distracted. "We'll have to get him away from Mobius, first. We'll need time, and privacy. But between the two of us, yes, I think we can save him."

"Thank God." Sebastian moved his fingers anxiously against Ruvik's back. "We have to help him, Ruvik. Just thinking about what they've put him through…what he's going to put _himself_ through once we get him back…." He sighed with frustration. "He doesn't deserve this."

Ruvik frowned into Sebastian's whiskers. "He's important to you."

"Yeah. Yeah, he is." His voice depend with emotion that gave Ruvik goose bumps. "He was the only one who stayed by me, after…everything. I just, you know. I fell apart. Everyone else kept their distance, but Joseph was determined to look after me. And, Christ." He rubbed his eyes and then pushed his hand back through his hair. "I treated him like shit. He was only trying to help—why was I such an asshole to him? He didn't deserve that, either."

"Anything Mobius is doing to him now isn't because you were an asshole," said Ruvik. "It's not your fault."

"I know. But maybe if I'd taken better care of him when we were in STEM, they wouldn't have been able to haul him off in the first place. I should have done more for him." Sebastian growled unintelligibly. "If anything happens to him, that's what I'm gonna be thinking the rest of my damn life, however long that is."

"Stop." There were too many things coming out of his mouth that Ruvik didn't want to hear, he couldn't unpack them all at once. So he pushed himself up just enough that he could fix Sebastian with a steady look. "I'll get him back for you, all right? Stop worrying."

Sebastian stared back at him, and his expression twisted into something almost pained that Ruvik couldn't quite identify. He lifted his hand, tracing out the invisible scar line across Ruvik's brow with his thumb. It tingled beneath his fingerprints. "But you only care because I do," he said.

"Isn't that enough?" Ruvik tried to watch the movements of his hand. "If you're expecting more than that from me, you'll be disappointed."

"Probably," Sebastian agreed. He feathered the backs of his knuckles across Ruvik's hairline. Still his face gave no clear indication of what he was thinking. "But then again, you did stick your neck out pretty far for me today."

Ruvik tried to remain stoic, but that simple caress stirring his hair was too new to him and too tempting to ignore, and he leaned into it. "So did you."

"That has to mean something _,_ right?"

"Like what?" Ruvik asked impatiently. When Sebastian started to lower his hand, he took it, holding it in place. "What does it mean?"

"Hell, I don't know. Not like it's the first time you saved my life." Sebastian rubbed his thumb against Ruvik's forehead where the Plexiglas would have formed a point. "Maybe everything I've seen in here just has me wondering," he said. "Like, where you'd be now if this world wasn't such a shitty place."

There it was: pity. He should have recognized it sooner. Ruvik shuddered with an anger that was almost nauseating, and he pushed at Sebastian's chest, drawing his knees up so he could climb off of him. He hadn't survived Mobius' black hole minions and the fractured enemy of his own mind only to be mocked with _pity_.

"Hey—" Sebastian grabbed his arms before he could get far. "Ruvik, what—"

"You think you know anything about the life I should have had?" Ruvik snapped. He tried to yank himself free, but the strength of Sebastian's broad hands was startling when he had only moments ago been so lax. It made Ruvik's skin crawl. "Let go of me!"

"No—hold on a minute," Sebastian persisted. He kept a tight grip as he tried to sit himself up. "I didn't mean it like that."

"Let go!" Ruvik shouted, and when that didn't work, he _made_ him. He stretched his frenzied mind across Sebastian's nerves and pried off every finger one by one, ignoring the curses it earned him. But as soon as he was free and turning to get to his feet, suddenly Sebastian had him by the wrist.

"Wait," he said, but Ruvik could barely hear him; he was staring in panic at the hand closed around him that should have been under his command. "I'm only trying to say that I—"

"Shut up!" Ruvik tried again. Even after his ordeal Sebastian's every cell was so familiar to him that in an instant he had closed the man's mouth and removed the hand from his wrist. He relished the look on instinctual fear that blazed across Sebastian's eyes as his muscles worked without him. But then that apprehension turned to stubborn determination, and his hands began to move again. He was fighting it. He couldn't get his jaws to open, but his lips pulled back and his brow furrowed in concentration as he flexed against Ruvik's influence. And he was succeeding.

_No, he can't_. Ruvik shivered as he felt hot fingers closing around his wrist again. _He's mine._ He slipped free and snatched up Sebastian's hands, lacing them with his. _You're mine, and you'll do what I say._

Sebastian's nostrils flared as he continued to resist. He had so much more physical strength on his side, and for a moment it even seemed that he'd be able to put it to use. But when Ruvik leaned into him, pushing with his weight and twisting sinews from inside, his defenses failed. All at once he fell back into the sofa, wrists pinned at his ears. The rest of his straining body fell into place, and despite the wrath still in his eyes, he was helpless.

Ruvik's breath stumbled out of him. _Any strength he has came from me,_ he reassured himself, maintaining a firm hold to prove that truth inescapable. His quivers of insecurity sharpened into manic elation as Sebastian's chest rose and fell beneath him. _It was my device that gave him power within the nightmare_ , _and without it, he has no control over me._ _He is mine._

Ruvik leaned down and sealed their mouths in a kiss. It would have been a simple task to force reciprocation, but he didn't, letting Sebastian's angry hisses steam his cheeks. His ownership was clear enough already. He thought of being pulled free from his captivity within his own mind, the bare echo of sensation he'd been granted of seeking hands cleaning and soothing his deadened skin—a pathetic insult to the tickle of breath now against his face, the sweat in his hair and rough, chapped lips on his. He drank all of it in. He would have killed a thousand Leslies if it meant having Sebastian tangled in every one of his senses.

Sebastian growled and huffed, and when Ruvik gave him back his mouth, his first act was to bite. The sting of teeth against Ruvik's lower lip gave him an odd sense of déjà vu. But when Ruvik didn't relent because of it, a tremor went through him and he followed with a kiss of his own. They came together with all the heat of that early morning, sucking and gnawing at each other's tongues. It was like an affirmation: they had combined their strength and survived on multiple battlegrounds—they were dependent on each other. Every inch of them ought to know that.

Sebastian broke the kiss with a gasp. "Let go of my hands," he said.

Ruvik did so. He leaned in again, but then Sebastian grabbed him by the throat, pushing him back. His pulse thudded against Sebastian's rough palm, and though the grip wasn't tight enough to close his airway, he held his breath anyway.

"Just because I let you get away with it before, that doesn't mean our conditions are out the window," Sebastian told him firmly. "Stay out of my brain."

Ruvik touched the inside of Sebastian's wrist. Having confirmed for himself that his control had not diminished, the threats were more enticing than intimidating, and he stroked a slow line down the delicate tendons of Sebastian's forearm. "Must you be so stubborn?"

Sebastian gulped. "I mean it," he said, but when Ruvik leaned forward, he made no attempt to prevent them from coming together again. He met every fierce kiss Ruvik offered, pawing at Ruvik's shoulders and back to keep him close. But when Ruvik shifted position enough to straddle his hips, his resistance began to return, and with a groan he lowered his hands to Ruvik's waist.

"Wait," he panted, even as he twisted the hem of Ruvik's shirt between his fingers. "This is a bad idea."

"What is?" Ruvik grabbed fistfuls of Sebastian's hair, pinning his head in place so he could smother his answer in another biting kiss. Feeling Sebastian's body simmer beneath his, fully willing where his mind was reluctant, spread a thrill of arousal all through him.

But Sebastian wasn't quite through. He relented to Ruvik's demanding mouth for long enough to lose his breath, and then he was pushing back again, turning his head away. "We shouldn't do this," he said.

"Why?" Ruvik challenged. He squeezed Sebastian with his thighs and pushed against the sofa cushions, sighing blissfully as the friction hardened his eager cock; he couldn't fathom how he had lived so long without knowing that sensation. "Why shouldn't we?"

Sebastian dug his knuckles into Ruvik's hips as if to stop him, but that only excited him more, and it didn't do anything to hide his own growing erection, either. "Because I don't like you," he retorted. "And an hour from now I'm going to hate myself for this."

"That leaves us plenty of time." Ruvik gave Sebastian's hair a yank, tipping his head back to get access to his throat. "Touch me, Cas," he said between each hard kiss. " _Touch me_."

Sebastian growled low in his throat and twitched with restraint, but when Ruvik licked the curve of his jaw, the fight was suddenly over. "Fuck it," he muttered, and then he pulled against Ruvik's hands so he could get a proper kiss.

Their mouths clashed, and as Ruvik was distracted by the unexpected passion, scathing fingers crept beneath his shirt. He wasn't prepared for how delicious it felt to have hands kneading into his naked back, and he ached his spine, moaning deeply. "Harder," he breathed. He bit at Sebastian's lips and chin to get his point across. "Harder—make me feel it."

"Jesus Christ...." Sebastian complied a little too well—he raked down the lines of Ruvik's ribs with his nails, clenched bruises into his shoulder blades. Ruvik whimpered and sparked beneath every his every violent attention, reveling in the pain that was _his_. He wanted marks he could cherish all over his body. He wanted blood blossoming under his skin as proof he still lived.

Ruvik drew himself back, sitting up so he could yank his undershirt off. Sebastian must have thought he was trying to escape again, because he was quick to follow, one arm snaking tight around Ruvik's waist to prevent him from going far. Ruvik had no such plans anyway. As soon as he was free of his shirt he clawed Sebastian out of his, and they tangled each other up, all groping mouths and bruising hands. It was blistering and he never wanted to stop. But then Sebastian's hands dove down the back of his pants, and the hard squeeze to his ass swelled an urgency in him that was almost overpowering.

"Wait," Ruvik gasped. His cock was straining against his pants, and he turned his face against Sebastian's neck as he concentrated on not giving in so soon. "Wait."

Sebastian scoffed and gave him another good squeeze that had him moaning. " _Now_ you want to wait?" he grumbled, but as Ruvik murmured and squirmed, he seemed to catch on. He slid his hands free and instead attacked Ruvik's fly. "Make up your damn mind."

"I just don't want to—" Ruvik cut himself off with another heavy moan when Sebastian plunged back into his pants, this time taking up cock. The stroke of his rough palm made him see stars. " _Wait_ ," he said again, and he shoved and smacked at Sebastian's chest to get him to back off.

Sebastian relented with a chuckle. The hoarse rumble of his voice was unexpectedly stirring, and Ruvik was relieved when he leaned back, letting the air cool their heated skin. "You're kind of cute when you're about to come," he taunted. "God, I hate myself already."

He flopped onto his back, and Ruvik was about to chide him for retreating too far, only to realize he needed the space to wrestle his own pants open. He pushed them down just enough to tug his cock free; the sight of it, flushed and hard in his slowly pumping fist, made Ruvik's mouth dry.

"Come on," said Sebastian. He slipped Ruvik free of his jeans and then grabbed him by the hips, repositioning them. "Wait any longer and I'm going to change my mind."

Ruvik watched with wide eyes as Sebastian circled both their erections and squeezed. It wasn't anything like when he had touched himself—even when he'd used that same hand to do it—and his hips jerked forward, wanting the friction of callouses against his sensitive flesh. Sebastian encouraged him, one hand guiding him to move back and forth while the other rubbed their cocks together. Every stroke was electrifying, and if he could have seen himself he would have been ashamed of how hungrily he thrust against his partner, gasping and moaning unintelligibly. _Not yet_ , he thought, digging his nails into Sebastian's chest. Sebastian's fingers tightened involuntarily at the sting, and the added pressure made him almost faint. He sped up. _Not yet, not yet._

Sebastian gave him one long wring up to the tip, and Ruvik couldn't keep it in any longer; his muscles snapped tight and all at once his pleasure overran his senses, bursting forth in a shuddering climax. His vision swam out of focus and it wasn't until Sebastian grabbed his elbows that he realized he had almost sagged off him entirely. For several throbbing seconds he was engulfed in near perfect euphoria. Then he took a breath and realized just how short that time had actually been. "Shit," he muttered.

Sebastian grunted as he steadied him. "Is that the first time I've heard you swear? Must have been pretty—"

"Shut up." Ruvik pushed back his sweat-matted hair. Though even more exhausted than ever, he was filled with a strange, buzzing energy, and all he wanted was more. As soon as he had his breath, he grabbed up both their cocks for himself.

He wasn't ready for the jolt that overly-enthusiastic stroke shot through his softening member. Every inch of him was buzzing with oversensitivity and it _hurt_ as much as it thrilled. With a raspy murmur he did it again, grinding against Sebastian's still straining erection.

"Ruvik." Sebastian reached down to try and stop him. "You don't have to—"

Ruvik slapped him away. His hands weren't as large as Sebastian's and he had a harder time holding them both, but that didn't stop him from trying. Each jerk of his fist made him shake as his nerves blazed, spurred on by the groans of pleasure Sebastian tried and failed to suppress. Once he had the hang of it he lifted his gaze. Even if the pain hadn't been igniting his arousal it would have been worth it to see Sebastian as he was then: eyes heavy with lust, tongue darting over his parted lips, his fingers digging into Ruvik's knees. As he drew closer to his own limit, his breath grew ragged and his chin tipped back.

"Fuck," Sebastian grumbled. "Why do you feel so good?"

Ruvik shivered, and he couldn't keep his eyes off Sebastian as he doubled his efforts. He clenched and stroked until Sebastian was arching beneath him, until he came with growl that had him tingling. Even after his fingers were slicked and the cock beneath them totally spent he kept going, until Sebastian pried him off.

"Okay, okay." Sebastian sagged into the couch as he caught his breath. "Good God...."

Ruvik crawled over him; he was still panting himself, but that didn't stop him from seeking another hard kiss. _Of course you won't hurt me_ , he thought, sucking tiny rumbles of pleasure from Sebastian's mouth. _Of course you came after me. This is how it's supposed to be._ He purred against Sebastian's lips and tugged at his hair. _You're mine._

"You're mine," he whispered, and he kissed him again.

***

Sebastian kissed him back. When Ruvik's steam finally ran out and he tucked himself in against his chest once more, the rest of the room returned to focus. He'd been kind of hoping another awakening was waiting for him, but as the last pleasant echoes of climax ebbed away, all the aches and pains of that terrible morning began to make themselves known. His brain still felt too large for his skull and chopping his whole damn leg off was starting to seem like a viable option. But for a moment, it wasn't so bad. A warm body draped over his, lax with exhausted passion, soft breath in his whiskers—another person was wrapped in his arms, wanting him. An unbalanced and unpredictable person, maybe, but one whose damages he was finally coming to understand, who had fought by his side and risked his life for his sake. Things certainly could and had been worse. And as he closed his eyes, hoping for just a few minutes of lazy peace, a sudden thought crept up on him.

_This is the rest of your damn life._

His breath caught. He fingered damp locks of Ruvik's hair and let that revelation churn through his stomach.

_You're too much of a coward to kill him,_ he thought. _But he's too dangerous for you to ever leave him to his own devices. If everything works out somehow and you save Joseph and Kidman, and you destroy Mobius, and you get away...what then?_ He swallowed hard and was shocked by how heavy Ruvik suddenly felt against his chest. _This is what. As long as you're both alive, he's with you, and you're with him. There's no way around it._

Ruvik sighed and pushed himself up, but rather than finally separate them, he only sought yet another kiss. And Sebastian gave it to him.


	12. Chapter 12

Joseph hadn't been in Sebastian's apartment since filing his report with Internal Affairs. It was a bit neater than he remembered: dirty laundry mostly in baskets, no used dishes left out, no half-empty liquor bottles anywhere in sight. No deep cleaning had taken place, but Sebastian had clearly made an effort to reduce the clutter, probably more for Phi's sake than his own.

Joseph nudged the kitchen trash bin with his foot and heard glass bottles clinking together inside. Plenty of them. With a sigh he continued into the living room.

"Not much here, is there?" Tatiana said as she followed him. She glanced over the sparse furniture with a critical eye.

"It was supposed to be temporary," Joseph explained. "Just somewhere to stay until insurance could work everything out after the fire. But they never got around to finding another place, never bought back half of what they lost…." Joseph idly touched the corner of the television. "I gave this to them. Seems so ridiculous now. 'Sorry about your daughter—here, have a TV.'"

"You made an effort. That's more than most people can say." Tatiana moved to the sliding door that led to a cramped balcony. "We've had eyes on this apartment since he went missing. If he had come back here, we would have known it."

"I know, and so would he." Joseph headed for the next room. "That's not why I wanted to come here."

The bedroom hadn't improved quite as much as the rest of the apartment, with the bed unmade and an empty bottle of bourbon on the night stand, but at least that meant Sebastian had been making it that far at night. Joseph tried not to think about the times he had come to pick his partner up for an early morning call only to find him passed out and half falling off the living room sofa. Instead he investigated the closet, pushing clothing out of the way to reveal a shelf nestled into the far corner with a gun case on it. He flipped the latches open.

"Joseph?" Tatiana was coming down the hall.

Joseph needed only a glance to confirm what he'd already suspected, and then he closed the case back up. By the time Tatiana was in the doorway, he had already hidden the case behind a raincoat. "You were right," he said, straightening his suit coat. "There's nothing here that will help us. Let's go."

***

Sebastian turned out to be right about at least one thing: an hour later, the self-loathing set in.

After a too-short nap to ward off total exhaustion followed by a quick clean up, he began spreading out the files they'd retrieved from the station across the floor. His eyes jumped to the file of Patricia Yates, a school teacher who had—along with her mother, apparently—disappeared into Mobius' underbelly to be dissected and tortured by a brilliant madman. As he read through the report he couldn't help but imagine the various traps and instruments he had come across throughout Ruvik's mind, the ways they had likely been employed against the missing women. A dozen cases lay before him representing lives taken, families shattered, and _he_ couldn't stop thinking about the man responsible rubbing his cock. Shame didn't begin to cover it—he felt like chewed up dog shit.

Then Ruvik emerged from his shower. He was dressed in sweats too big for him, hair still damp and mussed, and he sat himself down next to Sebastian with easy familiarity. There was something endearingly needy about the way he leaned into Sebastian's shoulder, though he may have been trying for possessive. The warmth of his body unraveled all common sense.

"Find anything yet?" Ruvik asked.

The victims came back into focus, and Sebastian cleared his throat. "No, not yet." He began shuffling the cases about, organizing them by age. "Myra only talked a little about her cases to me, but I remember her saying none of them were connected at first because of the randomness of the victims. There's no clear MO that links them together like you'd normally see in a serial abduction. Mobius takes all sorts, apparently."

"Myra," Ruvik murmured, watching Sebastian work. "You trusted her?"

"The hell kind of question is that?" He shrugged Ruvik off his shoulder. "Yeah, it looks like a lot of unsolved cases, but every cop has their cold files. She was still one of our best."

Ruvik gave a noncommittal hum as he turned to the coffee table, starting up his laptop. Sebastian was tempted to tell him off some more, but then his eye caught in the notes of one of the files in his hand. "Agent Green," he muttered to himself, brushing his thumb over Myra's handwriting. "One of Myra's resources in the FBI. She always did get on with the feds better than any of us. Looks like he helped her with some surveillance footage." He flipped through another file and found the name again. It tugged at the back of his mind until suddenly he remembered a flash of teeth, and he dropped the papers.

"Special Agent Green— _Dennis_ Green—that asshole Kidman shot. I knew I recognized him." He looked to Ruvik as his pulse quickened in his temples. "He was at Beacon when the feds took over the scene." The man had even said something to him as they passed each other, but Sebastian had been too busy arguing with the captain over maintaining access to the case to pay him any mind. He did, however, remember the awkward grin, same as just before Juli shot him dead. "Mobius has moles in the FBI?"

Ruvik brought his laptop closer as it continued to boot up. "It wouldn't surprise me," he said. "I was able to get a look at their headquarters from Kidman's memories. It wasn't much but it should at least let us identify the building." He frowned. "I would have tried to learn more, but…."

"You did enough," Sebastian said quickly. "Knowing where they are is gonna help a lot more than these files." Sebastian continued to sort through them anyway, but just as Myra had explained, there didn't seem to be any recognizable pattern. The files included people of all genders and ages, of various ethnicities and from different walks of life. Most of them would have never intersected in their everyday lives.

"It seems almost intentionally random," he thought aloud, glancing through a young man's file. "Like they were filling a quota." He tried not to think about Ruvik leaning over each bloodied victim, but memories of the labs crept in anyway. "Like a scientific sample. They were trying to make a machine that would control every person in range, right? It had to affect _everyone_ , so they were testing it _on_ everyone."

"Sound reasoning," Ruvik agreed. He opened a browser window and called up a map of the city. "I was more interested in their brainwaves than anything else, but that's not something you can filter for until after the subject is in custody."

"That doesn't explain exactly how they're picking, anyway." Sebastian leaned closer so he could see the screen as Ruvik pinpointed the downtown they'd traversed that morning and then began to follow a path in street view. "Maybe if we could see where the holes in their coverage are, we could narrow the field."

"We're not really in the position to worry about preventing future abductions," said Ruvik. "Besides, once we've found our way in, we won't have to."

"I guess not."

Ruvik continued to click through the streets, following the expressway into the southwest. Sebastian estimated he was about an hour out when he finally stopped, turning the road view toward a sleek, modern building, six stories tall with lots of tinted windows and what looked like an atrium dome in the roof. Sebastian blinked at it, his stomach crushing up against his ribs. "Here?" he asked. "You're not serious."

"This is where Kidman came out of this morning," said Ruvik, pointing out a road that led behind the building. "There's a garage in the back. Why, do you know it?"

"This is a _federal_ building." Sebastian took over the touch pad, angling the view to get a look at the building's signage up front. "It's an FBI field office—has been for years."

Ruvik's brow furrowed. "That's just a cover they use when dealing with outsiders."

"But if you're sure this is the right building, it is a real FBI office."Sebastian shook his head. He couldn't decide if it made perfect sense or if he was about to finally lose his mind. "Didn't they bring you in a few times to hack people apart? There's no way that goes on inside an office like this without people finding out."

"No. I suppose not." Ruvik leaned his chin into his hands, staring at the images on the screen with increasing discomfort. "But that would mean the entire building itself is in on it. Or else the entire FBI...."

"No—not possible. Not that I'm a fan of government, but that's…you said they didn't have that kind of power." Sebastian leaned back against his hands. Too many memories were crowding behind his eyes and ears and it was making him dizzy. _How many "special agents" from that field office have you met?_ he tried to recall, their faces whipping past like a slideshow. _How many cases have you been forced to give up because they claimed domestic terrorism or some other jurisdiction bullshit?_ Before he came anywhere near an answer, those questions were overpowered by the memory of Agent fucking Lim with his hand against his daughter's back, his wife's voice tight and close.

" _This is Agent Lim, one of my contacts in the bureau. He has to leave now."_

"That's why they targeted Myra," Sebastian murmured, cold sweat on his palms. He rubbed his eyes and forced himself to continue flipping through the casefiles until he found a too familiar name on one. He couldn't bring himself to open it. "She was closer to them than anyone, she must have put it together. They would have been pressuring her to keep quiet—Lim even said he promised her that he would…." The report fluttered in his clenched fist. "I should have picked up on her struggling. How did I not see it?"

Ruvik didn't speak. For once Sebastian would have preferred a few sarcastic remarks or some cryptic bullshit to keep things from imploding in on him. "Is this not news to you?" he asked sharply. "Because this is a huge fucking deal, Ruvik. Didn't you know? You were in Kidman's mind, back in STEM—you had to have known."

"Mobius's bureaucracy wasn't a priority of mine at the time," Ruvik replied in kind. "I wanted to know what she was after, how I could exploit her, not…." He shifted uncomfortably beneath Sebastian's glare. "I thought it was just a cover—even Jimenez said so. How would I have known? What do I care about the FBI?"

"Yeah, okay." Sebastian snorted. "Or maybe you just don't want to admit you're not as good at this whole mind-reading thing as you claim to be."

Ruvik tensed angrily, and Sebastian worried he was about to find himself on the opposite end of a demonstration, but then he looked away. "Mobius treated Kidman with some kind of infusion before she came to Beacon. I thought that I successfully broke through it with STEM's help, but…it's _possible_ I missed things. And before that, I never asked and wouldn't have cared. I didn't know."

Sebastian watched him a moment longer just to see if he'd confess anything else, and when nothing followed, he sighed, sinking into his shoulders. "It can't be the whole damn FBI," he muttered. "They would have been exposed by now. I mean, hell, they'd have to. If it was that big Myra would have found a way to warn me somehow. Christ, though, this changes everything."

"It doesn't change anything." Ruvik straightened himself up and started taking screen captures of the building and the surrounding map. "It's still just one building. As long as the STEM terminal is intact we can at least get Joseph and her out before they're able to get outside help, wherever it comes from."

"'Her'?" Sebastian lifted an eyebrow. "You care about Kidman now?"

Ruvik's eye twitched. "I'm fine with leaving her, if you prefer."

"No, I'm just surprised you give a crap." Sebastian rubbed his face again, thinking that if he could somehow remold his face into an expression of calm, the rest of him would follow suit. It would have been nice to pass out for a while longer. As he glanced longingly at the sofa, his eye caught on the headphones and their cords piled on the coffee table. The sight of them gave him goose bumps.

"We're going to have to rethink our plan," he said.

"How so?"

Sebastian tried not to make a face. "The plan was we find a way to sneak in and hijack their STEM terminal," he explained with condescending patience. "But this is a government facility we're talking about, and I can barely get around on my own, even with the crutch, which we lost. And you." He waved at the headphones. "Those things aren't even the real deal, and they almost put you in a coma. What good is it gonna do us to get in there only for you to scramble your brain again?"

Ruvik jabbed stiffly at his laptop. "I'll think of something," he muttered.

"God, I hope so. Because if you turn those things back on and wind up trapped in your own nightmare again, I will _not_ go in after you."

Ruvik stopped typing and snapped his full attention to him. "Yes, you will."

Sebastian's heart gave a thud. He tried to glare back at Ruvik with defiance, but he wasn't about to fool anyone, let alone the mind-reader. When Ruvik turned and leaned into him, his brain went white, and before he could even consider rejection, his mouth was claimed in a heavy kiss. His lips were already raw and it was startling how much the sting enticed him. It had been a long damn time since he'd tasted passion like it, and it was much too easy to reciprocate. But then Ruvik pushed against his chest, likely trying to get him on his back. With a grunt he grabbed Ruvik by the jaw.

Ruvik went tight, for a moment seeming almost vulnerable, as if he were fearful of having his control threatened again. That, too, fascinated Sebastian far more than it ought to have. If he pushed too much the outcome was obvious, so instead he drew Ruvik in again, but slowly. Seized by senseless curiosity he kissed Ruvik deeply, tenderly, wondering if a creature like him could appreciate affection that didn't come with teeth. He cupped Ruvik's face with gentle hands and pretended, just for a little while, that there was something inside the man worth romancing.

Ruvik's hands clenched against Sebastian's chest. He seemed unprepared for even forced sincerity and didn't know what to do with himself. When he was kissed again he wilted, just slightly, and the catch of his breath was so charming it gave Sebastian butterflies in his stomach.

 _Careful, Castellanos_ , a voice warned at the back of his mind, even as he stroked Ruvik's cheeks with his thumbs. A tiny murmur of pleasure rumbled out of his chest, and Ruvik answered in kind. _You can't wish him human._

The kiss ran out, and Ruvik leaned back, out of Sebastian's hands. He was blushing hotly and he tensed up again, awkward and uncomfortable. "I'm hungry," he muttered, and he tried not to touch Sebastian as he climbed to his feet and headed swiftly for the kitchen. "I'll make us something."

Sebastian flopped onto his back as the breath rushed out of him. His heart was pounding and the room hazy and spinning around him. _You're an idiot_ , he told himself fiercely as he closed his eyes and tried to will away the youthful spark in his belly. _And you're making this worse._

A few minutes later, he heard Ruvik's bare feet on the carpet, and a plate was set on his stomach. He opened his eyes and watched Ruvik sit down next to him, eating a sandwich—close, but not quite close enough to touch, as if he didn't trust himself, either. As he ate, he kept his focus on the laptop, but Sebastian could _feel_ eyes on him. He knew he was being contemplated and scorned and obsessed over, because he was doing it, too.

 _He's like...a tiger some asshole buys off Craigslist_ , Sebastian thought as he watched Ruvik tuck a damp strand of hair behind his ear. _Thinking he can keep it as a pet. But the damn thing just doesn't belong, and everyone still manages to be shocked when it eats the family dog._ Sebastian rubbed his face, grumbling wordlessly. _Meanwhile, you're the jerkoff making excuses for a serial killer so you'll feel less guilty about fucking him. What is the matter with you?_

Sebastian moved the plate off his stomach and hauled himself up. Seeing the casefiles strewn around them certainly brought things back into perspective. Then he looked to his lunch and realized that next to his sandwich, Ruvik had left him a cigarette and lighter. Thoughtful piece of shit.

He lit up, cupping his hand over the flame. "Think you'll be able to adjust your headphones?" he asked. "Make them less dangerous?"

"I'm not certain yet," Ruvik admitted between bites of his lunch. "I suppose I could try leaving an exposed wire. A steady current out to keep me focused."

Sebastian frowned as he ate. "Especially if you light your hair on fire, I guess. Come on, there's got to be a better way than that."

"We'll see." After a long silence, Ruvik finally pulled the device into his lap. "If we were able to get more supplies, I could build another one," he said. "To transmit on the same frequency."

Sebastian's appetite faltered, so he took a few puffs off his cigarette. "I don't like that idea, either. What if they take us both out at once?"

"We'll be gambling, whatever we decide." Though Ruvik looked reluctant, he connected the headphones to the computer's USB. "I'd feel better about our chances with a stronger connection to you."

 _There, see?_ Ruvik didn't move, but Sebastian could feel the electricity coming off his skin, like a seeking magnet. _Remember when you slept with Tracey Kesser after homecoming, and you were in love with her all sophomore year? This is just like that._

Sebastian moved his plate to his other side so he could scoot closer. "Show me what you've got on the building," he said, trying not to pay attention to their thighs touching. "I'll start trying to think of some way of getting in while you work on the transmitter."

Ruvik perked up a bit as he angled the laptop screen. "There seems to be a wooded area toward the rear," he said, pointing it out. "If we take this side road, that will get us the closest without being detected…."

***

"You should report to the Administrator," Tatiana said as she parked the SUV back at Mobius headquarters. "He'll want to hear your report first hand."

"Of course." Joseph climbed out and glanced around the parking garage; he had half expected Myra to be standing at the entrance, just as when they'd left, but she wasn't, to his relief. "What about Agent Kidman?"

Tatiana shared a word with Agent Granger and sent him off before facing Joseph. "She ought to be finishing up with her own report by now. Why?"

"I just want to ask her a few things." There shouldn't have been any reason to dance around the point with Tatiana, but he'd spent enough time as Sebastian's partner to know the value of confirming a hunch before taking it to the higher-ups. "Maybe I'll run into her on the way."

They moved through the security checkpoint together, but before Joseph could head for the escalator, Tatiana took his hand. "You'll tell me if you think of any leads," she said. "Won't you?"

She didn't grip him that hard, but his hand still tingled. "Of course," he replied, and once she'd let him go, he continued deeper into the facility.

 _Where would he go?_ Joseph pondered as he rode the escalator down, fingers tapping anxiously against the rail. _Somewhere he would have thought of, or Ruvik? If he has any of his own mind about him, it wouldn't be anywhere obvious. Not the cabin. Not a friend._ He thought of Detective Phi's ranting over the CB and sighed. _Not an enemy. Even most of the cash-only motels around here would know his face one way or another. Where is Ruvik hiding him?_

He was just stepping off when he spotted Juli scanning her palm at the checkpoint ahead. She stopped when she saw him, waiting for his own hand scan to allow him inside. "Joseph," she greeted. She looked overly eager to see him. "I was hoping I'd run into you."

"Same here." There were a lot of people milling about, so Joseph motioned for her to follow him toward the atrium. "I think we should talk."

Juli fell into step alongside him. "Did they find anything new?" she asked. "Any clues? Any leads?"

"Not yet. But there is something I wanted to ask you." Joseph kept an eye on her as they walked; knowing that she had been within KCPD with an ulterior motive all along hurt his confidence that he could spot if she lied, but he had to make an effort. "About what happened to Agent Green."

Juli grimaced. "I told him we should have waited for backup," she said.

"You said he saw Ruvik and Sebastian enter the corner store," Joseph prodded. "And you followed them out back."

"Ruvik must have realized we were there." Juli faced straight ahead, strain in her voice that didn't seem faked. "He was waiting for us among the trees out back. Neither of us saw it coming. He probably would have killed me, too, if those workers hadn't come out."

Joseph watched her a moment longer, but she didn't give up anything else. "Did Ruvik pull the trigger?" he asked. "Or did Sebastian?"

"I didn't see—I was diving for cover." She sighed. "Either way, it's Ruvik that killed him. Poor bastard. I told him to wait."

They reached the corner, where an alcove held a vending machine and water cooler for the techs on break. It was as much privacy as they were about to get without drawing suspicion, so Joseph stopped. "Kidman," he said, and she stopped, too. "I was at the scene. Agent Green was shot with a .45."

Juli stared back at him. She really was a decent liar, but now that he knew what he was looking for, he could see her calculating her response. "So?"

"Sebastian carries a .38."

"He also has a Model 22," Juli countered. "He let me squeeze of a few at the range the last time we went—so what?"

Joseph lowered his voice. "It's still at his apartment," he said. "The only .45 near that scene was yours, so tell me one more time what happened."

Juli faltered, but only for a moment. "We're not back in the precinct," she told him firmly. "You're not my supervisor, and I already gave my report to the Administrator."

She turned to leave, so Joseph took her elbow, halting her. She flinched in his grip. "I'm serious," he said. "Did you shoot that man?"

Guilt flashed across her face before she could squash it, and she lowered her voice to match his. "It's like I said already. Whoever pulled the trigger, it was Ruvik that killed Agent Green."

Joseph relaxed enough that she was able to slip free. She looked ready to turn away again, but there were a pair of techs heading in their direction, so instead she faced the water cooler. Joseph pretended to scope out the contents of the vending machine while she filled a plastic cup, until the techs had safely passed. When he looked back, he couldn't help a pang of sympathy: she was certainly rattled and trying to hide it. He would never forget the terrible pressure of another mind invading his own and he hated the thought of anyone else enduring the same.

"If Ruvik can still influence you, you need to tell Gutierrez," he said.

Juli shook her head. "She'd just take me out of the field. I'd lose my position with Agent Lim."

"You _shouldn't_ be in the field. You'd be putting yourself in danger being anywhere near Ruvik."

"We're _all_ in danger from Ruvik," Juli insisted. "Their 'infusion' doesn't work—sooner or later Ruvik wins every time." She shook her head again, putting her cup down without having taken a drink. "Here, there, it doesn't matter, not when they're already planning on bringing him in alive. That's a mistake I can't let them make."

 _That's against our orders._ Joseph's hairs stood on end at the notion, his skin prickling with a sensation like raindrops. "Believe me, I'd be just as happy with Ruvik in the morgue as locked up. But we can't risk taking him out until we know what effect he's had on Sebastian." He glanced around to make sure they were still alone and then leaned closer. "I know you're angry," he said. "And scared. I remember what it felt like when Ruvik took control of me inside the STEM—you're not alone in that. But Gutierrez helped me so that he can't hurt me anymore, and she can help you, too. Just tell her the truth."

A struggle played out across Juli's face. He knew she had her pride to consider but the gleam of desperation in her eyes started to make him wonder if there was something else going on he had missed. "I don't trust her," she admitted at last. "And neither should you."

"What do you mean? Why not?"

"You really don't find any of this fishy?" She edged in closer, too, her voice hissing with urgency. "Covering up all this death—lying to KCPD about what's really going on?"

"You're one to talk," Joseph replied, and she winced. "Maybe I don't like it, but Gutierrez is right: it's necessary. If people knew that Ruvik was out there, with all he's capable of, there'd be panic. More people would just get caught in the crossfire, including my partner. I don't want that."

"What about Beacon?" Juli pressed, and Joseph's heart gave a heavy thud behind his ribs. "They built that Machine— _Mobius_ built the STEM. People have been tortured and _murdered_ by them."

Joseph shook his head. His hands suddenly felt too hot in his gloves and he wasn't sure why. "By Ruvik," he corrected her. "He was the one that corrupted the STEM; it wasn't made for that."

"Then what _was_ it made for? What purpose could it possibly serve except...." Juli's expression screwed up with frustration, and she looked very ready to break into a tirade, but then she held herself back. The desperation was back behind her eyes. "Two nights ago, when I was at Beacon, they took you to a back room," she said. "What did they do to you in there?"

 _I don't know what she's talking about._ The thought came to Joseph so suddenly, and so strongly, that for a brief moment he was sure he had spoken the words aloud. Then, he did. "I don't know what you're talking about," he said before having given it any consideration.

"They did some kind of surgery on your hand," said Juli. "On your _chest_. They put something in you, Joseph."

 _That's ridiculous._ "That's ridiculous," he replied. "Dr. Gutierrez has done nothing but try to help me." His heart ached with the memory of a bullet carving holes through his ventricles, hot blood pooling between his organs. "If it wasn't for her treatment, I'd still be trapped in the nightmare Ruvik made for me. I owe her my life."

"You don't understand. She is not a real doctor—these are not real government agents. They only helped you so—" She stopped herself, grimacing. "So they could use you," she finished in a quieter tone. "You're just a pawn they're using to get to Ruvik, so they can finish their fucked up experiments."

"That's enough," Joseph snapped. "You sound like Sebastian." He hadn't known he was going to say it until he did, and he winced, trying not to let her fervor sweep him up. He should have been well practiced in that already. "You're just being paranoid because Ruvik got into your head. You need to stay out of the field for a while and get yourself together."

"You think I'm making this up?" Juli showed off her left hand. At first he didn't see anything out of the ordinary, but then slowly it came into focus: a pale scar following the lines in her palm. "You see it, don't you?" she asked. "You have one just like it."

 _No I don't_. "No, I don't," said Joseph. "What are you trying to—"

"Just _look_."

Juli snatched up his wrist, and before he could fight back, she yanked his glove off. There was no avoiding it: he looked. Again, he didn't see anything at first, and the look of startled confusion that overtook Juli's face made it seem as if she had been wrong after all. But when she rubbed her thumb across his palm, it stung like a scalpel. A sharp, burning pain spread up his arm and into his chest, spurring his pulse.

"What the hell?" Juli muttered as she clasped Joseph's hand with both of hers. "This was fresh just yesterday—how did it scar over so fast?"

 _There's no scar there_.Joseph stared at the rough line of skin. He could feel the difference when Juli ran her fingertip over it. But he didn't have a scar—how could he see and feel something not there? He felt sparks under his skin like stripped wires, and his stomach turned so fiercely he had to clap his other hand over his mouth. Was there blood in his mouth? He could taste fiery copper bubbling up the back of his throat, even though there wasn't a scar in his chest, either, there wasn't a scar, so why was his shirt hot and wet and—

"Joseph."

Myra's voice flicked a switch somewhere inside him, and he felt normal again. There was only a faint echo of guilt skirting his edges, but when he looked up and saw her approaching, even that slipped away. She wasn't alone: a Korean man was at her side, dressed in black and looking rather smug. As they drew closer, Joseph snatched his glove back from Juli and shoved it on. He didn't want her to see him less than composed. Fortunately the sight of the pair sobered Juli from her bizarre paranoid fit, and they were both able to face their visitors calmly.

Myra stopped in front of them; her companion settled so close to her that it rose Joseph's hackles. "Are you all right?" she asked.

"We're fine." Joseph gave his hand a self-conscious shake and gathered himself up. "I was just on my way to make my report to the Administrator."

"That won't be necessary," said Myra. "I think we've heard everything we need from Agent Kidman." Juli frowned but didn't comment. "You can go back to your room and rest for a bit, if you need to."

"I'm fine," Joseph insisted. "I'd rather get back to work right away."

The man smirked at him, which didn't help Joseph's already low first impression. "First days are always rough," he said. "You shouldn't push yourself."

"I can't rest knowing my partner is still out there with Ruvik. Though I appreciate the concern, Mr….?"

"Agent," Myra corrected for him. "This is Agent Ye-Jun Lim."

"A pleasure," said Lim, extending his hand. Joseph didn't particularly want to shake it, but he did, and wasn't surprised at the overcompensating grip. "Myra's told me a lot about you. I have the feeling you'll do very well here."

Joseph managed not to frown; he didn't like being the focus of Lim's bright-eyed stare. "Thank you."

"It's good to see you up," said Juli, and Joseph was relieved when the man's attention shifted away from him. "How's your arm?"

"Right as rain." Lim let go of Joseph's hand so he could show off to Juli, flexing his fingers. "Left a nasty scar, though. I'll show you sometime."

She snorted. "I think I've seen enough of your scars already, thanks."

"He's ready for active duty again," said Myra. "Which means you're going right back out in the field, Agent Kidman. If you're up to it."

"Yes, ma'am," Juli replied immediately, ignoring the hard look Joseph fixed her with. "I'm ready anytime."

Lim gave her a thump on the shoulder. "That's the spirit," he said. "Maybe there's an even bigger gun in the armory we can check out for you." He started to move on, and Juli obediently followed. "Have you ever fired a .50 cal Desert Eagle?"

"Is there any other Dezzy worth firing?"

He laughed as they continued on together. Joseph watched them, lips pursed as he considered calling them back. Finally he turned to Myra. "Kidman shouldn't be out in the field," he said. "She's too vulnerable to Ruvik and she'll put other agents at risk."

Myra regarded him without concern. It was strangely eerie how familiar the expression was to him. "Agent Kidman knows how to handle herself," she said. "And Agent Lim has just had a fresh infusion. Ruvik won't be able to control Lim, but if he thinks _Kidman_ is vulnerable, it may draw him out."

Joseph clenched his fists; he remembered too well the gun in his hand only hours before, a woman crumpling beneath his bullet. "So you're putting Agent Kidman herself at risk," he accused her.

"She's not a police officer anymore," she replied, "she's a government agent. She knows the risks. And so do you." She stepped closer, and he tensed without really knowing why. "We need to do everything we can for Sebastian. The longer he's with Ruvik, the less chance we have of ever getting him back. You understand that, don't you?"

"Of course I do. But Sebastian wouldn't want her to get hurt for his sake, either." Joseph sighed with frustration. His nerves were still rattled, and being face to face with Myra only made it worse; it was too difficult for him to reconcile the care she was expressing for Sebastian with the long months of her willful absence. "I just don't understand how this all happened," he admitted, working the stiffness out of his fingers. "How it's even possible that you're here, and he's out there, and I'm…."

"Joseph," said Myra, for a moment sounding honestly sympathetic. "Are you all right?"

"Yes, it's just…." She was watching him too intently for him to lie; he offered up his left hand. "Kidman was going on about some kind of scar, or surgery, or…."

She took it, and though her grip was loose, he felt the scar Juli had pointed out to him shift like plates being rubbed together. "Do you trust me, Joseph?" she asked quietly.

 _Yes._ "Of course I do," Joseph said quickly. "I want to bring Sebastian home as much as you do."

"I know. And I know if anyone can do it, you can." Myra squeezed his hand. "Don't worry about Juli; just focus on Sebastian. I know you won't be able to live with yourself if anything happens to him."

Joseph's heart skipped. The words seemed to burrow up his arm and into his chest, making his next breath hard to take. "I'll find him," he said. "I have to."

Myra let him go, and his mind began to spin as if it had been left loose within a vast, empty space. "You should go back to your room for now," she said. "Get some rest. If you think of anything, you know where my room is."

"All right." As eager as Joseph was to charge back out into the city, he was suddenly having a hard time concentrating, and a mattress beneath his back sounded heavenly. "You're sure I shouldn't give my report to the Administrator first?"

"I'll take care of it," Myra assured him. "Go on."

"Thank you."

Joseph wasn't sure how else to part from her, so with a nod he turned and headed back toward his room in the recovery ward. He passed a few people on the way; they offered nods of acknowledgement. He hadn't gotten to know many of them yet, but eventually they would be his fully fledged co-workers. It made him nervous, not unlike childhood memories of arriving at a new school. Fitting in had never come easily to him. Eight years in Krimson City and he still managed to feel like an outsider from time to time.

Back in his room, Joseph draped his gun holster and suit coat over the back of a chair and then stretched out on the bed. He closed his eyes and told himself that he just needed a few minutes, a short nap, to recharge and make himself ready for the world. But the black behind his eyelids was too clean of a canvas—he kept thinking of Sebastian in the alley, ragged and limping, blood in his eye and bandages around his neck. It made him ill to think what his partner must have been put through, and what Ruvik continued to put him through.

 _He wasn't wearing his own clothes_ , he thought, trying to focus on memories that might be of some use. _He was hurt but he was clean. At least Ruvik is taking care of his pet._ Joseph scowled and pinched the bridge of his nose. _It means they have somewhere to fall back to. Someplace Ruvik thinks they're safe, where they can regroup, out of sight. But where?_ He set his glasses on the bedside table and sighed, sinking into the mattress. _Where are you, Seb?_

***

They worked all through the afternoon. There was only so much they could glean from exterior shots of the building, but they mapped it out as best they could, talked through Ruvik's visits and the few details he remembered, and indulged in a great deal of speculation. Meanwhile, Ruvik pored over lines upon lines of code for his transmitter and ran limited simulations through his lap top. None of his calculations had been wrong. He could think of half a dozen ways to increase his potency further, but the answer to stability was still far away. Once or twice he even thought he sensed Leslie in the room.

They were running out of time and options, in many ways. And it didn't help that Sebastian himself had become a distraction.

"What it's really going to come down to is how far you can push your range," Sebastian said, snubbing out yet another cigarette on the lunch plate that had become his ashtray. "Whatever security they have, it won't be anything we can fight our way through, not without bringing the entire place down on us. We need to at least be inside before they know we're there and for that we'll need you."

"I know." Ruvik didn't look up, but he was almost painfully aware of every movement his companion made; every roll of his eyes, every stretch of a sore muscle, every breath. Each had dug under his skin and he didn't know how to get them out. Not that he _wanted_ them out, necessarily. If he hadn't been wary of Sebastian's judgment he'd already be closer, leaning into his sturdy back. He wanted strong shoulder blades against his chest and whiskers at his cheek. What a ridiculous notion. He ought to have been ashamed.

But still, there it was. Even his own miraculously obtained body didn't fascinate him anymore compared to the specimen beside him. He wanted to own and endure every inch of it.

Sebastian abruptly groaned and pushed to his feet. "I need a break," he declared. "I'm gonna go talk to Bre, let her know we're not going to be here much longer." He still didn't look entirely stable on his feet, and watching him sway made Ruvik dizzy. "We should turn in early and leave before dawn. Hit them in the morning."

Ruvik frowned. "You wouldn't prefer the cover of night?" he asked. "I thought that's how this sort of thing was normally done."

"If you're covering our tracks, time of day shouldn't matter, right?" Sebastian replied. "And during the day, most of them will probably be out looking for us. Early morning is as good a time as any to catch them off guard." He must have interpreted Ruvik's lingering stare as a lack of confidence, because he shrugged. "I know we're not in great shape, but we need to finish this. The longer we wait, the less chance we have of getting Joseph and Kidman out of there."

"I know." Ruvik still wasn't entirely convinced, but he nodded. "Go tell Bre."

"Maybe she can even get her crutch back from that bar," Sebastian muttered as he limped to the door. "Guess I'll have to make do with the tree branch."

He left, and in his wake the apartment grew colder. Ruvik glanced between the different corners of the room, anxious of finding a shadow even though the warm light of early evening was still strong from the windows. Then he looked to his transmitter. With a deep breath, he unplugged the headphones from his computer and cradled them in his lap.

Just that morning, their weight in his hands had filled him with such confidence, and a sense of true accomplishment and purpose that outweighed even vengeance and fear. Everything he had wanted, just within his grasp. Rain on his face that had tricked even his own senses. A world of his own making awaited him, and yet now he hesitated. Not only had his powers failed him in the face of Mobius' black-hole agents, his entire ego had folded in on itself in helpless imprisonment. How could it be that he was not strong enough to wield the power he had carved out of reality itself? The very idea was maddening.

Ruvik slipped the headphones over his ears and held them tight. _If I can't break through Mobius' defenses, through their control, this entire venture will have been pointless_ , he thought as he closed his eyes. _Will have been...a waste. That can't happen._ He rubbed his thumb back and forth over the power switch. _Without my power, they'll take him. Who will protect him them? His partner, his wife?_ His lips drew back in a sneer. _There is only me. I must have control._

He flipped the switch, and at once he felt his mind flooding throughout the building. He saw and felt and reveled in every blazing light within his reach. None was stronger than Sebastian, making his way very carefully down the stairs toward Bre's apartment, but Ruvik stayed away for the moment—surely by now Sebastian would be able to sense if he delved too deeply. Instead he slipped from one stranger to the next, just observing their mundanity, not exerting himself. He was too aware of the danger lurking just beyond his sight.

 _No. I can't be afraid of him._ Ruvik grimaced as he pushed himself further, spying on the tenants in the next building over, the drivers passing by. _How can I face Adam if I can't even face Leslie? Once, I knew no fear. Why should now be any different?_

Ruvik tipped his face up, reminding himself of the feel of rain on his skin. _This world is mine_ , he told himself fiercely. _There is nothing in it that I should fear._

He wasn't alone. He felt the air stir before him, and every cell in his body drew in tight, ready to scatter into molecules at any moment. In another state of mind he might have thought it cruel that fear itself would settle before him in such obvious defiance of his affirmations. But there was nothing in him that could hate her, not even for an instant. Shivering, he opened his eyes to black hair and pale, porcelain skin.

And for the first time in years, Laura smiled at him.


	13. Chapter 13

Sebastian had hoped that forcing himself to take the stairs would give him back some much-needed confidence regarding is ability to hold his own physically. It didn't work so well.

He leaned back against the wall facing Bre's apartment for a minute to catch his breath. _Permanent damage to the muscle_ , he reminded himself, wiping the sweat from his forehead. _He did warn you._ Once he had his composure back, he stepped forward and knocked on the door.

Bre took her time answering; he could almost feel her shifting back and forth indecisively behind her peep hole, and he wondered if maybe Ruvik was wearing off on him too much after all, that he could sense that much. When she did open the door, her expression was carefully manufactured to appear as neutral as possible. Something had changed between them.

"Cas," she greeted shortly. "What is it?"

"Hey." Sebastian never did like beating around the bush. "Not happy to see me?"

Bre crossed her arms. "You said you didn't want to involve me. This is my 'I'm not involved' face."

Sebastian couldn't help a little smirk. _Smart woman, Bre_ , he thought. "Yeah, well, I just wanted to let you know, we're not going to be in your hair much longer. We'll try to leave it like we found it."

"Or close enough," said Bre with eyebrows raised. "I saw that bottle you opened."

 _Busted_. Sebastian scratched the back of his neck. "I'll make it up to you," he promised. "That and the crutch I borrowed. It kind of got left behind at…O'Hare's."

He expected a disappointed scoff, but the wary, knowing look that Bre fixed him with was worse. "That's fine," she said. "Insurance paid for it anyway." After some hesitation she glanced up and down the hall and then finally offered the truth. "You shouldn't be out in the open like this. They're talking about you on the news, and everyone here knows your face."

Sebastian felt said face grow white. Within the panic of their escape and the struggles that followed he hadn't given much thought to whatever story the police had been reporting. _Three people are dead—of course Remington had to release a statement._ _Even if they were insane cultists trying to rule the world._ "I don't know what they're saying about me, but it's not true," he said.

Bre shrugged uncomfortably. "I don't want to know. I'm just letting _you_ know, whatever it is you and that kid are mixed up with, you ought to be leaving town, not holing up here." She hesitated a moment and then asked, "Is he okay?"

"Yeah, he's...." He found himself wincing. "Whatever they're saying about him, it's not true, either."

"I'm not involved—I don't care." But Bre's expression showed otherwise, and after another moment of hemming, she leaned closer. "Just be careful," she said quietly. "You know I've always said you're one of the good ones. I want to believe that's still true."

 _Is it?_ Sebastian couldn't be sure, so instead of trying to convince her, he only said, "Thanks, for that. For everything." He took a step back. "Take care of that little girl of yours, Bre."

She smiled tightly, and with a nod she stepped back as well. "God bless," she said, and she closed the door.

Sebastian leaned against the wall again. He was already aching for another cigarette. She was right—it was dangerous to linger where anyone could walk in and see him, but he wasn't quite ready to return to the room yet. He would have liked to step outside, collect his thoughts in the sun. Breathe in his city one more time.

Running away had always been part of the plan. Whether they could destroy only a part of Mobius or all of it, staying in Krismon afterward would have been senseless. He didn't have much of a life to leave behind, but the thought of his home city turned against him was more unnerving than he wanted to admit. All those familiar shops and faces, the beat he'd walked as a rookie, even his shithole apartment—everything, going up in smoke. He felt an unexpected and exaggerated pang of grief and guilt for that loss, only to realize moments later that it didn't entirely belong to him.

His ears were buzzing with feedback—Ruvik was at it again.

Sebastian grabbed the handrail, depending on it as he hurried back upstairs, all the while muttering to himself. "Stupid fucking little...how many times do I have to warn him?" He was breathing hard by the time he reached the second floor and jerked the apartment open. He had enough presence of mind not to slam the door behind him and draw attention. It was just as it clicked shut that he realized Ruvik wasn't alone inside.

"I didn't think you would approve," Ruvik was saying. "He's not what I think you had in mind when you said I should make an effort."

"The hell are you…." Sebastian entered the living room, and when he saw who Ruvik was talking to, he froze.

Laura Victoriano was sitting across from Ruvik among the scattered police reports. Her legs were delicately folded and her red dress fanned out around her, as silky and rich as her black hair. Only two hands were clasped in her lap and her skin was fleshy and pale. Even knowing instantly who and what she was, the faint smell of her shampoo tricked Sebastian at first into thinking she was real. Maybe Ruvik was a god after all—maybe his power was so great the line between living and dead was nothing to him, just as he had once claimed.

It was Ruvik's face that proved otherwise. He was beaming at his sister with more emotion than he had ever shown, full of fondness and relief. But there was a second layer beneath his affection that Sebastian felt as much as saw: the tightly leashed anguish of resignation. It was roiling beneath his surface like waves trapped under ice, and Sebastian shivered with the sensation of spreading cracks.

Laura glanced up and smiled at him, and it _hurt_.

"See?" said Ruvik, and his voice was no less affecting. "I told you he'd come running." He gestured between them. "I don't think you ever got to see her like this," he told Sebastian, though his attention never left Laura. "She wanted to meet you."

Sebastian glanced from one to the other and found it hard to breathe. Somehow, the gloss of Laura's happy blue eyes was more frightening than the talons and bloodlust he was used to. "Ruvik," he said hoarsely. "What the hell is this?"

"What does it look like?" Ruvik replied. He somehow managed to sound as terrifying and as heartbreaking as the phantom herself. "This is my sister, Laura."

Laura offered her hand, and Sebastian thoughtlessly reached back. Her skin was soft and human and it gave him goose bumps; he quickly let go. "But how…." He looked back to Ruvik and noticed the headphones covering his ears. They were partially translucent, as if their wearer was trying very hard to forget they existed and he was only seeing its echoes. As the realization came to him, his blood ran cold.

"It's been a long time since I was able to see her like this," Ruvik continued. "I can only imagine I owe it to my new-found power." He swallowed. "Or to you. Apparently you left quite an impression on her earlier."

"This was your end game all along, wasn't it?" Sebastian said, his gaze dancing back and forth between the ill-fated siblings. "STEM wasn't enough if it was just being together in a dream world, but this...." Laura smoothed a strand of hair behind her ear, and the effortless, natural appearance of her every movement churned his stomach. "If _we_ could all see her, hear her, know her—through you—it'd be just like she was still alive."

Ruvik didn't answer right away. He continued to stare into Laura's eyes as if no force in the world could tear him from them. "I could have done the same for you," he said at last. "Tell me you wouldn't have sacrificed just as much as I have, if it meant having your young daughter back in your arms."

"No." Sebastian could barely get air into his lungs but he squeezed the words out anyway. "Don't you dare." He had no idea what would happen to him if Ruvik conjured a cruel ghost to taunt him with. The very notion left him faint.

*

"I know." Ruvik had no intention of venturing down that path; Sebastian's panic was already diffusing through the air between them, and he wasn't sure what would happen to him, either, if he set it ablaze. "You wouldn't able to accept that, would you? Your worldview is so limited."

Laura was staring steadily back at him. He couldn't look away—it was painful even to blink. She was so beautiful and so dense, occupying the space more fully than any other apparition he could have generated. "But I could have done it," he said, each breath from her lips making up his air. "I could have had her again, except...."

Laura tilted her head to the side, awaiting him to continue. It split him at his seams. "Except I can't remember her voice," he confessed, drawing into himself. His expression tightened with the strain he could no longer hide. "I could, just a few days ago. She spoke to me—she was warning me. I could hear her so clearly, so why...." He gripped his knees and leaned forward. "Say something," he ordered of her, trying to recall that moment only days ago when she had been so close by his side. "Anything."

Sebastian was wavering dizzily on unsteady knees. "Ruvik...."

Laura's smile grew jagged, but instead of obeying, she lifted her hands, offering them to him. Ruvik retreated further. The more he tried to claw back to him simple memories of comfort and home, the more the stench of rotting flesh invaded his nostrils. She was no longer the tender flower that had loved him like a mother, soothing him with rocking arms and warm blankets. Her every pore was a scar on the earth ready to spew fire. "Maybe you were right," he muttered, all his hope turning sour. He could already sense the monster beneath her skin, and the anticipation of it ripping free was slowly driving him mad. "You were right, Cas. This Laura isn't any more alive than Leslie."

Sebastian edged closer. "Ruvik—"

Ruvik's sprang forward, snatching up Laura's outstretched hands. She convulsed in his grip, and just as he'd expected and feared, her skin crumbled beneath his clenching fingers. The heat from the barn seethed up through her flesh and into him, charring them both. Brilliant red and orange spread up her elbows, ripping back her façade to reveal the blackened and malformed beast he had made of her. Within seconds her dress was aflame, her hair, and at last he could hear her voice as she screamed in shrill agony.

And he still couldn't look away. He forced himself to watch fire and wrath swallow her whole, ignoring the burns that rippled up his arms and chest. He had done this to her; he ought to watch. He deserved to have every instant of her hell carved into his body, and it shaped him back into the gnarled grotesquerie he was meant to be, pieced and numb with brain matter exposed. A pack of wolves might have destroyed him, but _he_ had destroyed _her_ , over and over in his own mind, enslaving her memory to his vengeance. Sebastian was right. He had made a monster of her, and only the blaze could reveal them both for what they really were.

Suddenly, he was ripped free. Laura's talons raked across his palms as Sebastian yanked him back, extinguishing the fire that their joined hands had spawned. Ruvik allowed it. He let Sebastian's arms surround him and continued to watch as Laura reeled and began to disintegrate. Her burning sinews flaked away, hair shriveling like candle wicks. Her voice cracked through the growing holes in her chest and throat and finally she vanished in a puff of ash.

"Stop," said Sebastian. His hands were hard and shaking as he slumped on his knees, drawing Ruvik in. "Stop, that's enough."

 _Sebastian. Of course_. Ruvik sagged into him. _He knows this pain._ He let his mind fall open, drinking in that terrible memory they shared of rising flames and choking smoke. He could see a home falling to cinders with a tiny body blistering inside—he felt hot breath steam across his glass scalp and relived with him that horror. Sebastian may have never heard his daughter cry out from the smoldering wreck, but Ruvik was all too willing to offer him the experience of a thousand restless nights, waking in the dark to ears ringing. And Sebastian, in his turn, bestowed on Ruvik an even crueler gift: the impossible, helpless weight of grief that followed the death of denial itself.

Out in the streets, he had tricked himself into believing in the rain of his own making, but there was no escaping the truth: His last hope was a fool's dream. Laura had always been dead.

Ruvik quaked. He glared into the empty space his sister had occupied and willed her back, but nothing stirred. "No," he hissed, and he shoved at Sebastian's arms, trying to free himself. "No—no!" When he couldn't get free he dug in with his nails, but Sebastian held fest. " _No_!" he continued to wail, even after he'd given up his struggles. He let himself be drawn to Sebastian's collar and there tried to bury himself, fingers stiff and teeth bared. When even words failed him he screamed, smothering his fury against the body supporting him. He couldn't cry. He could only choke and howl as his hate boiled him alive.

*

Sebastian knew that pain. He wrapped Ruvik up and tried to quiet him against his chest, but feeling every labored sob reverberating against him only drew him further back into that horrid memory. He wasn't even entirely sure that it wasn't merely his own grief finally given voice, roaring from his lungs. His every rib ached with the force of it and he could barely breathe.

 _The Devil doesn't mourn like this_ , he thought as Ruvik clutched bruises into him. _He's no animal, either._ The mechanical connection STEM had offered seemed ridiculously trite in comparison to how close he felt to Ruvik then, how deeply he empathized. Every bitter, angry impulse that he had tried to drink down bubbled to his surface and he wanted to scream, too. _He's just one more God-forsaken asshole chewed to pieces by this shitty world we live in._ He clasped the back of Ruvik's neck, grimacing at the gnarled scars that made up his flesh. _This is still how he sees himself, but there was a real human being in here somewhere, at some point. A little boy that loved his sister. If only Hell had never found him._

It fueled him with hate. All his adult life he'd spent trying to protect misfortunate souls and what was the fucking point of it? Two dead families, two broken men. It wasn't fair. He couldn't accept that they were so helpless.

 _There was a real human being in here, once,_ Sebastian thought again, seized by a reckless hope. _Maybe under all this, there still is._ He dug into Ruvik's jagged skin. _And even if there isn't, maybe you can make one._

He pulled. He didn't know why he thought it would work, but he wanted so badly to find soft, unblemished skin beneath, belonging to a softer, uncorrupted person. He _willed_ it so. And when the scars fell away, he found it: peachy flesh and tiny hairs hiding along the nape of Ruvik's neck. He slipped between the layers and splayed his fingers along the line of his pulsing jugular.

Ruvik shuddered and fell quiet. His thoughts were still shattered glass and Sebastian felt his sudden confusion at the unexpected tactile sensations. Sebastian took advantage of his bewilderment to tear another strip, laying open his tender throat. But when he tried to go further, peeling the dead away from his bobbing Adam's apple, Ruvik grabbed his wrist.

"Sebastian?" His voice was rough, just like when Sebastian had first heard it crackling out of STEM's scattered memories, but at the same time so far removed in its frailty. "What are you—"

"Wait," said Sebastian, a swell of urgency driving his other hand to action. "Just wait." He scratched at Ruvik's deformed ear until the scars began to come up there, too, and as he raked them away, his heart thumped; supple cartilage lay beneath. With a swipe of his thumb he revealed a perfectly sculpted ear just waiting to be put to use.

Ruvik grabbed that hand, too. "Stop," he demanded, but when he felt the ear for himself, his focus drifted, and he let go so he could trace the shape of it. "How are you—"

"Just wait. Just let me...."

He continued to tug and peel the scars away from Ruvik's neck. It wasn't until he reached higher, freeing the underside of his chin, that Ruvik recovered his wits and began pushing back again. "No," Ruvik said, but his hands were shaking, and though he gripped Sebastian's wrists he didn't have the strength to pry him off. "Stop—let me go!"

" _Ruvik_ ," Sebastian snapped, and the unexpected harshness halted his protests. "Hold still."

Sebastian pressed both hands to Ruvik's jaw and pushed upward, fingers sliding beneath his mangled face as if he were lifting a mask. Every inch he uncovered was flushed and sensitive; his thumbs dragged along Ruvik's narrow lips, the slopes of his nose, the hollow of his eyes, and he felt as Ruvik felt, as if there were hands uncovering him, too. They'd crossed wires somehow. He held his breath just as Ruvik was holding his and shivered on his same frequency, until he could tear the flap of damaged flesh off entirely and reveal what it had been hiding.

Ruvik's face. Lean cheekbones and long angles made up a face he should have grown into—a man he might have been, a life he could have hade. He was handsome and he looked nothing like his father.

Sebastain stroked the freshly uncovered skin with the backs of his knuckles, watching intensely as Ruvik struggled to adjust. It was too much to comprehend at once and both of them were light-headed with disbelief. But then Sebastian drew him in, kissed him deeply on his new lips, and all at once he felt the scream rise up in his throat again. He knew what he had to do.

 _I don't have to kill him_ , he thought, and he grabbed Ruvik's tattered hospital robe—had he always been wearing it?—and yanked it off his shoulders. _I don't even have to hate him._ He kissed Ruvik again and dug in with his nails, dragging the scars off his back. Ruvik hissed and squirmed in his arms. _I can just change him._ He clawed a path down his spine and growled when he felt it arch beneath his hands. _I'll remake him._

"Sebastian, wait," Ruvik gasped between their mouths, but when he tried again to push himself free, Sebastian only drew him in tighter. He gripped each of Ruvik's shoulders and pushed again, stripping him of his robe and the scars coating his arms at the same time; he freed Ruvik's biceps and elbows, narrow forearms and delicate wrists. He circled each finger and smoothed the creases between his knuckles, wearing away reluctance with every touch. It made his palms tingle, even more so when Ruvik reached for him, testing his new hands against whiskers. His next kiss was met with significantly less resistance.

That was all Sebastian needed. Emboldened by his apparent success he carried on, splitting Ruvik open along his sternum, flaying his chest and ribs. He peeled the imprints of trauma from Ruvik's waist and then squeezed, encouraging Ruvik to press harder against is body. He took special care at the small of Ruvik's back, where a scar of his own had weighed on him for too long. It was unexpectedly liberating and he wanted Ruvik to find it equally so. And it seemed to be working. Ruvik's murmurs of complaint turned to heavy sighs as his lips remembered their earlier enthusiasm, seeking longer and fiercer kisses as Sebastian took him apart piece by piece.

 _See? He wants it just as much_. Sebastian urged Ruvik up on his knees so he could relieve him of his pants. He uncovered the curve of Ruvik's ass, the trembling span of his thighs. _He doesn't want to be this thing, either._ He squeezed Ruvik's calves and shed the dead from his feet, leaving nail marks in his new skin. When he reached between his legs, Ruvik groaned all through his teeth. Sebastian was grateful to be occupied with his tongue and teeth—he didn't want to look. He stroked firmly downward, dispelling the rot, and his own cock throbbed as Ruvik's swelled against his hand, so eager and so sensitive. Ruvik's voice rumbling against his tongue was so satisfying it made him dizzy.

But there was still one barrier left. Sebastian sucked hungrily at Ruvik's mouth, keeping him distracted as he lifted his hands back to his crown. Before Ruvik could realize what he was up to, he wedged his thumb between scars and Plexiglas and yanked as hard as he could.

The false skull ripped free. Ruvik jolted, biting into Sebastian's lips to smother his outcry. _It's just metaphor anyway_ , Sebastian told himself firmly as he cast the plate aside. When his hands came together again, he found that the gaping hole was already sealing over, just as willing to pretend. He dragged his nails along Ruvik's scalp and blonde hair blossomed beneath his palms—hair that _belonged_ to him, not borrowed or stolen. It was thick and coarse, begging to be gripped and tugged. He wrapped his fingers in it, holding Ruvik still for yet another long kiss.

This was a man Sebastian wouldn't have been ashamed to have sympathy for. Without the tragedy in his past he might have been handsome and shrewd—without his thirst vengeance, maybe his worst sin in life might have been a poor bedside manner. Sebastian didn't mind when Ruvik continued to gnaw at his mouth even after any cause for pain had passed; that passion made up his only redeeming quality as it was. And when Ruvik pushed, finally Sebastian relented. He let his back hit the floor and welcomed Ruvik leaning over him, bruising their lips against each other.

"How did you do this?" Ruvik demanded as he shoved his hands beneath Sebastian's shirt, scraping it up his chest. "How can you?"

Sebastian arched his back, hissing as Ruvik drew welts along his skin. "I don't know," he admitted. "I don't fucking know...."

He lifted his arms. Ruvik got the shirt up to his elbows but then gave it a twist, tangling Sebastian's arms. It was a childish distraction, but Sebastian was already so mentally exhausted that it worked; while he struggled with his arms over his head, it made it so much easier for Ruvik to lift himself up and take hold of his waistband. With newfound strength, he rolled Sebastian onto his stomach.

Sebastian flushed with heat, sweating even after he'd managed to free himself of the cumbersome shirt. By then Ruvik was leaning into his back, skin on skin, more biting kisses on the back of his neck. He was exhilarated and apprehensive and fierce all at once, and he couldn't tell how much of each was his own, and how much was his partner's. Each brush of teeth was like a brand down to the bone. He took a deep breath, trying to reclaim some kind of focus, but then Ruvik dragged his rough hands down to the small of his back, and everything seemed to blur again.

"Were you hoping I'd take your scars away, too?" Ruvik growled, grinding his knuckles into the line of raised skin that lied just above his waistline. "Make you forget shame? I can remake you, too, if that's the game we're playing." He sliced across the ancient wound with his thumb and it burned as if it were fresh. "But I don't think you'll like what I make you into."

Sebastian flinched, shivering as Ruvik turned his wrist and slid his hand down the back of his pants. "That's not it," he said, but then two long fingers dipped between his ass cheeks. His body arched without him even as warnings rang in his ears. "I wanted you to—"

"To be more palatable for you?" Ruvik roughly kneaded his hole, and Sebastian shuddered with a premonition of what was in store for him. "To temper me into a 'proper' lover? To absolve yourself of guilt?"

"No!" Sebastian tried to gets his arms beneath him, to gain some leverage and roll free, but Ruvik only pressed more weight against his shoulders. He was stronger than Sebastian remembered, more than Ruvik himself anticipated, and his thrill at realizing the extent of his advantage pulsed between them both. It felt _good_ , and even though Sebastian was on the receiving end it wore down his instincts for self-preservation. "No, I wanted...I want you to feel human," he said. "For your own sake."

"Liar," Ruvik spat. "Did you forget that I can read your mind?"

With too little warning, he pushed his two fingers into Sebastian's ass. Sebastian shook, groaning curses as he scraped his face against the carpet. It had been a long damn time since he'd seen action at that end and his body flared and clenched against the intrusion. But even as he struggled to keep his breath and his wits, he was aware of Ruvik quivering against his back. What was painfully nostalgic for Sebastian was brand new for Ruvik, and for a moment he seemed dumbstruck, unprepared. It hurt, and he relished that pain as if it were his own, and that relish in turn trickled back to his companion in a bizarre feedback loop of pain and pleasure that neither of them knew how to handle.

Ruvik licked his lips—Sebastian tasted him on his tongue. Their nerves were treacherously entangled. When Ruvik began to move his fingers back and forth, he sensed instinctively how deeply to reach and what angle to aim for. Sebastian had never had a lover that knew his body so well and each stroke had him tingling. Even when Ruvik's bony knuckles stretched his asshole wider, stinging, he drank it in. He told himself he wasn't the kind of pervert that got off on pain, even less so the kind that got off on inflicting it. But Ruvik was drunk on the new sensations—of having control, of surrendering it, of penetrating and being penetrated—and experiencing each as if they were new for him, too, intoxicated Sebastian past the point of shame.

"Is this what you wanted?" Ruvik asked, breathless between the words. He rubbed their bodies together, and his skin felt hotter against Sebastian's back than when it had been aflame. He fumbled kisses at Sebastian's shoulder blades in ragged adoration as he fingered him back and forth, in and out. "Is this what 'feeling human' is?"

 _No_. Sebastian growled into the floor as he spread his knees wider, ignoring the complaints of his injured leg. _I feel like an animal._ "I just wanted...to help you," he gasped.

"You have." Ruvik retrieved his hand and began yanking Sebastian's pants down. "God, you have."

Not the way he'd wanted. The signal went both ways—Sebastian could see and feel the extent of Ruvik's obsession, relived all those gratifying moments of possession, experimentation, and delight that Ruvik had teased from their partnership. This meant something to him. But as Ruvik pressed up against the backs of his thighs, as he braced himself, he could see just as clearly how far short he'd fallen.

Ruvik rubbed the head of his cock against Sebastian's hole. He was already wet with desire though not nearly enough to make it any easier on them. He hesitated. Sebastian couldn't tell if it was his own nerves, or if he was reacting to _his_ trepidation, but it was oddly reassuring. At least the uncertain squirming was distinctly human. If Sebastian acted, he could stop this, and he came close. He was hot and desperate but a remaining shred of common sense still clung to him. It was Ruvik's hand on his hip, faintly pawing in his indecisiveness, that wore him down.

"Just do it," Sebastian said, angling his hips. "Fuck me."

Ruvik thrust into him, hard. It fucking hurt, and Sebastian had to bite hard into the meat of his palm to keep his voice down. Sweat flicked from his batting lashes and stung his eyes. But just as he thought it might have been too much, he felt Ruvik shivering all under his skin. His cock twitched and swelled with echoes of heated pressure swallowing it whole. If Ruvik hadn't been gripping his hips so tightly, he might have rocked forward as if there were a body beneath him waiting to be possessed. That mirrored ecstasy overcame any growing soreness in his muscles. When Ruvik pulled back, he squirmed, drawing his knees higher and dropping his shoulders in an attempt to better accept the next one. He may have been out of practice but it wasn't his first time taking a cock by any means, and he wanted Ruvik to give it to him right where he needed it.

Ruvik adjusted beautifully, rising up just enough that when he plunged in again, his swollen head stroked tantalizingly across Sebastian's prostate. The crackle of pleasure was mind-numbingly welcome, and he must have felt it, too; his breath caught and his voice keened with a throaty murmur. All hesitation was forgotten as he pulled back, only to thrust in again, urgently seeking more. He quickly established a rhythm. Letting Sebastian's instincts guide him, he improved slightly with every pump of his hips, until they were meeting each other perfectly.

Sebastian smothered a groan against his palm. Feeling Ruvik match his body's unspoken desires drove him out of his senses. Every electric sensation they shared was overwhelming; even as Ruvik fucked him, his own cock strained, as if somewhere in an alternate world he was the one with Ruvik on his belly, punishing him over and over. It was glorious and insane, and when Ruvik abruptly stopped, his every sinew snapped with defiance.

"Fuck, don't stop," Sebastian panted. When he tried to look over his shoulder, Ruvik grabbed his elbow and used it to haul him onto his back. Relieved, he immediately drew his knees up, letting Ruvik settle in between his thighs. They both took a moment to catch their breath, and in the pause Sebastian lifted his eyes to Ruvik's face.

He was still wearing the long angles and coarse blond hair, eyes heavy with lust, lips bruised red. He was undeniably beautiful and Sebastian felt a pang of attraction so strong his balls tightened. But this wasn't the face Ruvik had been hiding under his scars—this wasn't a Ruben Victoriano that could have been. He'd molded a creature of his own making and this man didn't exist.

Ruvik clenched his jaws and surged forward. His cock re-stretching Sebastian's hole had him grimacing at first, but as soon as they found their rhythm, all pain became rapture. Sebastian couldn't quiet his voice anymore; his left leg was shaking, and he devoted one hand to keeping it raised while the other clung to Ruvik's shoulder for stability. It left him to moan openly, choking on obscenities as Ruvik pounded him with increasing confidence into the carpet. Skin slapped against skin and muscles burned, until Ruvik's thrusts became reckless, desperate, and he shook with restraint.

"Oh fuck," Sebastian rasped, urging his lover faster and harder as the pressure mounted inside him. "Oh fuck, Ruvik, please—"

Ruvik buried himself as deeply as he could in Sebastian's ass—Sebastian clenched in tightly around him—and they both came, burst after burst, shuddering and groaning. The whole damn world fell away. A white hot climax ravaged their weary limbs and glimmered in every frayed nerve ending, multiplied by the echo chamber their conjoined senses had become. Sebastian squeezed his eyes shut and had to make a conscious effort to breathe, in and out, until everything stopped spinning and his lungs were under control. With his pulse still racing, he urged Ruvik back so he could stretch his legs.

Ruvik collapsed onto the floor next to him. The tempo of his breath had changed, and when Sebastian opened his eyes, his stomach leapt: he was back to his young face and corn-silk hair. The dark blush in his cheeks and ears was charming, and even more so, the gleam of satisfaction in his sleepy blue eyes. But then he paused. He looked down to his hands, then reached up, tracing the contours of his jaw and nose. A darkness passed over his features as he carefully sat up.

Sebastian watched him, his heart in his throat. Even though he was still tingling with passion, he felt shame creep up on him again as Ruvik continued finger his ears and hair. Their connection had ebbed away—he couldn't feel the fingers of Ruvik's mind on his and boundary was suddenly frightening.

He cleared his throat. "Ruvik?"

*

Ruvik turned. He took in the look of guilty concern on Sebastian's face and didn't know what to make of it. He wasn't sure what to make of _anything_. His body had never fully felt like his own, not since the earliest stages of his life, but the sweat and the adrenaline and the ache were pushing him out of synch with himself in a way he'd never experienced. Moments ago, he had been something else. He had felt in tune with a beautiful lie that didn't belong to him, and he hated himself for falling for it so completely.

But that look on Sebastian's face—the prints of Sebastian's body still cooling on his own. How dare he look so contrite and so inviting after wielding that power against him. He wanted to be furious, but he understood Sebastian's intentions better than he wanted to. The anger in him grew sharp, and he hated himself all over again for not being able to indulge any of the lies STEM had promised him. His sister, his body, his reclaimed life—he could have none of it.

"How dare you," Ruvik said, quaking with an emotion too intense for him to identify. "How could you—"

"I'm sorry." Sebastian took his arm and held on even after Ruvik flinched back. "I'm sorry."

Ruvik eyed him warily, but when Sebastian gave him a tug, he allowed himself to be drawn in. He curled up against a warm chest and let tired arms wrap him up. Instantly his lungs began to twist as if someone had stabbed a knife in his chest and was winding his organs like clock gears. He feared it would grind the rage out of him, but then Sebastian started rubbing his back, and gradually he calmed. He breathed Sebastian in and tried to focus only on the rumbling aftershocks of pleasure still circulating his blood.

 _I can still have him._ Ruvik tucked his nose under Sebastian's chin and wriggled as close as he could. He could still taste bile at the back of his throat, but at least his hands no longer shook. _If nothing else, he's still mine._

***

Myra heard the door open, but she didn't look up. She didn't have to; there were only two people who had the audacity to enter her room unannounced, and Lim didn't wear heels. She kept her eyes on the computer screens while listening to them tap closer, until Tatiana was leaning against the back of her chair, her nails scratching Myra's shoulders through her button down.

"Still at it, I see," said Tatiana, always a little too calm, always testing.

"They were retreating south," said Myra as she navigated the virtual map of the city she had been staring at for hours. "So they came from the south." On a second monitor she had a list of various police incident reports and anonymous call-ins from the area. "They must have found somewhere safe and reliable."

"Oda has his ear on the police scanner. Now that we can be sure the two of them are together, information is bound to surface." She poked Myra hard in the back of the neck. "I told you to let us handle this."

Myra leaned into it. "If I didn't think you could, I'd be out in the field already," she replied. "I'm just trying to put my experience with him to use." She began scrolling through a list of tenants in a building where someone had called in a break-in. "What would be the point of all that reconnaissance I used to do if I didn't?"

"My-ra," Tatiana sang, and she braced her elbows against the back of the chair, letting her hands dangle over Myra's chest. "You know I can see right through you."

She did know. On most days, it was a comfort she would protect with her life. "I'm not going to try anything foolish," she said, though there was every chance that Tatiana could see that, too. "It's not as though Adam is going to let me anywhere near him unsupervised, anyway."

"Neither am I." Tatiana rested her cheek against Myra's ear. "I want that man, Myra, _alive_. He's going to be the key to everything we've worked for." Myra could feel her lips pull back in a smile. "Don't worry. By the time I'm through with him, even he won't remember he was ever human. He'll never hurt you again."

Myra was distracted momentarily with pondering whether Tatiana even truly understood the concept of pain, outside its most basic definitions. When she couldn't think of how to respond, she changed the subject. "How did Joseph do out in the field?"

"He was fine." Tatiana straightened up, moving instead to lean against the desk. "You were right about him: once he's had a few more treatments, he'll do very well here." She hummed thoughtfully. "It's Kidman that concerns me."

"Let me worry about Kidman," said Myra. "Lim and his team answer to me."

"I'm very aware."

Her tone was carefully measured; she was still testing. Myra continued to hurry the conversation onward. "I heard the Administrator wasn't happy about the amount of attention you drew today. He got a call from Washington."

Tatiana scoffed. "You're not seriously worried about the Bureau, are you? We've been steps ahead of them for fifty years—that's not about to change now."

"Don't get cocky just because we're closer than we've ever been," Myra cautioned. She wasn't really paying attention to her screen anymore, but she continued to click about anyway. "That's exactly when things go wrong."

"You both worry too much. If they send anyone to check on us, they'll get the same treatment as always."

Tatiana was quiet for a moment, and then she reached out, drawing two fingers down Myra's cheek. Myra stopped her clicking and turned her head just enough to show the touch wasn't unwelcome. "I can do the same for you, if you want," Tatiana offered. "You just have to say the word."

It was more tempting than it should have been, but Myra knew very well what the consequences would be. "When it's over," she said. "When they're here, and it's settled. By then I'll want to forget anyway."

Tatiana smiled knowingly. "Of course." She pushed away from the desk. "I have some work to finish in the lab, just in case Lim manages to bring our boys in. But I'll come back later."

"Please," said Myra. "Otherwise I'll be at this all night."

"Always happy to distract you." Tatiana gave her shoulder a squeeze and then headed for the door. "And I'll bring food. I doubt you've had much to eat, either."

Myra shrugged as she went back to website scrolling. That lasted only until Tatiana had closed the door behind her. Once she was alone again she leaned back, letting the screen blur out of focus. The silence in the room seemed to hum and crackle into white noise, and she let it build, until it was buzzing beneath her skin. Tatiana always got what she wanted. Following that truth to its logical conclusion, sooner or later she would have Sebastian. Maybe she would stab needles into his skull, saturate him with her drugs and chemicals—or maybe she'd dissect him like Ruvik, placing each organ in its own glass case to be displayed. Maybe they could go visit his lungs and liver, and hear young agents cluck to each other over how their specimen should have taken better care of himself. And he would never know who had done it to him.

Myra was on her feet. She was breathing hard and the desk was overturned, monitor fallen and cracked, implements scattered. Her palms were sweating and she began to pace. _He might never know_. The thought had consumed her for months, carving deeper into her brain with each repetition, a comfort she had clasped so tightly it had become torturous. But a new thought had crept in alongside it, and they were chewing on each other's tails: Maybe he _should_ know. Maybe he deserved to know—maybe _she_ deserved to have him know. No one left at Mobius was qualified to judge her; only Sebastian could give her that. And how could she carry on without it?

There was a knock on the door. She answered, opening the door only wide enough to see who it was, to keep them from seeing the mess she'd made inside. Her heart skipped; it was Joseph. His breathing was elevated as if he had been running and his eyes were wide and conflicted. She knew immediately what he had to tell her and it made her scars tingle.

"I need to talk to you," Joseph said.

"Did you see Tatiana just now?" Myra asked before she was even stringing conscious thoughts together.

Joseph shook his head. He must have anticipated her meaning, because he said, "I haven't told anyone yet. I thought you should be there this time."

"Good." Myra snatched her jacket off the floor and joined him in the hall. "Let's go," she said as they started quickly off. "We can grab who and what we need on the way."

***

Sebastian dozed in and out of sleep. He didn't know for how long, but by the time he opened his eyes, the sun had set, leaving the room dark. Ruvik was still wrapped tightly around him, so he tried not to move too much as he carefully stretched his weary legs and back. _Everything_ was sore. _That was really stupid_ , he thought, grimacing, as he took stock of his many aches and carpet burns. _Is there a worse time for dry-fucking than this?_

Ruvik grumbled in his sleep, and without thinking Sebastian stroked his back until he had quieted. It was almost maddening, how natural it felt to be offering Ruvik, of all people, such easy comfort. Leaning back, he took a moment to study his unlikely partner's face. Not that it was even his real face—it was a stolen face, deceptively young and innocent. Sebastian traced the soft contours of his cheek and felt what might have been resignation ease through his chest.

 _This isn't the real Ruvik,_ he thought as breath tickled his chest. _Maybe there's no such thing anywhere. But this is what he is, now. You can't change him, can't fix him._ _If you're gonna keep going, it's this, or it's nothing._

He fingered the lines of Ruvik's ear, ridges and valleys that didn't exist in his dreaming form, down to the tender lobe. He sighed. "Guess you'll just be my little monster."

Ruvik inched closer, and it was tempting to stay put a while longer, but Sebastian didn't want to be drawn in any further with so much at stake. "Ruvik," he said, giving him a nudge. "Come on—we gotta get up."

Ruvik grumbled, but he did wake. Rubbing his eyes, he gradually disentangled himself from Sebastian and sat up. He looked halfway mystified at first, squirming as if getting used to his own skin again. Sebastian gave him a few moments to collect himself and then finally asked, "You okay?"

Ruvik frowned down at him. "Are _you_ okay?" He turned to face Sebastian better. "You're very sore."

"No shit." Sebastian got his hands beneath him and sat up with a groan. "There are better ways to go about that, you know."

"For next time, then." Though Ruvik was still wary, he couldn't hide the thread of eagerness beneath his tone. "You can show me."

Sebastian gulped; his imagination was suddenly alight with visions of Ruvik warm and writhing beneath him, and he wondered briefly if it wasn't Ruvik himself putting them there. "Next time," he agreed, but then he cleared his throat. "But we can't stay here anymore. If you feel up to it, I think we should find a motel for the night. Trick the owner into giving us a room for a day or two." He rubbed the small of his back. "We might have to delay our plans a little longer; I'm not sure either of us will be up to going to war come morning."

"True enough." Ruvik scratched at his stomach and made a face. "I'm going to clean up again."

He grabbed up his sweat pants, but when he reached for the shirt, Sebastian stopped him. It was a closed hoodie with a front pocket and no zipper or buttons. The events of the past hour simmered at the back of Sebastian's mind as he wound the fabric between his hands.

"How did I get this off you?" he asked.

Ruvik gave him a strange look. "You took it off when you were skinning me," he said.

Sebastian winced, but at least Ruvik sounded more sarcastic than accusatory. He shook his head. "No, I mean...I thought you were wearing your robe," he tried to explain. "Your hospital robe. I took it off your shoulders, remember? But I would have had to pull _this_ over your head...." He scanned the floor until he found the repurposed headphones nearby; he couldn't remember at what point he'd stopped noticing them. "You were wearing these when I came in," he said, baffled. "But I don't remember taking them off you. They were just...."

Ruvik looked thoughtfully from one article to the next. Something must have clicked in him; Sebastian _felt_ his swell of pride, and his lips twitched. "Then it would seem that we're more powerful together than we are separately after all," he said with satisfaction. He took the sweatshirt from Sebastian and climbed to his feet.

Sebastian squirmed uneasily as he turned on the nearby lamp. "What does that mean?"

"I'll explain later." He headed into the bathroom. "I still want to make you a transmitter of your own."

"No thanks!" Sebastian called after him, not that it would make much difference. He rolled his eyes and decided he didn't want to move too much until he could head straight for the bathroom. _Where the hell is that tequila?_

Ruvik didn't take too long, and then Sebastian had his turn, cleaning up as quickly but thoroughly as he could. By the time he was out and dressed, Ruvik had finished tucking all the missing person's files back into the duffel, for which he was more grateful than he wanted to think about. "There's a motel out on the highway we can try," he said as he buckled his gun harness across his chest. He took one last swig of the tequila before capping it for good. "It's small, a little sleazy, but it's on the way to Mobius. It'll be a good place to start out from."

"That's fine." Ruvik headed into the kitchen. "I'll figure out how much food we have left."

"Okay." Sebastian had just shoved is revolver in the holster when there was a knock on the door. _That's probably Bre_ , he thought as he moved to answer. Her apartment wasn't directly beneath them, but it still made him grimace to think of what she might have heard. He was already preparing excuses as he opened the door.

Joseph was on the other side.

Sebastian's heart jumped. Automatically his hand went for his gun, but as soon as he reached it Joseph's gloved fingers were around his wrist, preventing him from drawing. The look of hurt Joseph fixed him with threatened to turn his stomach inside out. Partners for almost a decade and his first instinct was to pull a gun.

"You don't need that," Joseph scolded, and Sebastian let go. He couldn't movie as Joseph plucked the revolver from its holster. "I just want to talk."

Sebastian looked past him; he didn't see anyone else in the hall, but that didn't mean all of Mobius wasn't already at the exits. They were fucked and his mind was utterly blank. "Joseph." It was hard enough to breathe let alone string words together. "How did you find us?"

"Someone in the building called in a disturbance," Joseph said as he emptied the revolver's bullets into his palm. "They said they heard screaming." He tucked the bullets into his coat pocket, the gun in the back of his belt. The shift of his jacket revealed his own weapon holstered against his chest. "Bre managed to talk down the responding officers, but when I heard the building address, I knew it was you." His wince made Sebastian feel downright guilty. "Did you really think I didn't know about your arrangement with Bre? I'm your partner."

Sebastian was speechless. He glanced behind him and spotted Ruvik in the kitchen archway; he looked pale, and when their eyes met, he shook his head.

"Can I come in?" asked Joseph.

 _We're fucked._ Sebastian drew his gaze back and felt a chill all over again at Joseph's unfamiliar suit and red-emblem gloves. "Are you alone?"

"No." He looked nervous, but determined, and it was fucking heartbreaking. "There are three agents in the hall, six more covering the exits. They're not going to act until I tell them to, but there's no way out this time, Seb. So can we please have a conversation first?"

 _We're totally fucked._ Sebastian looked back again. Ruvik was watching them like a hawk, but there was nothing in his face that indicated what he thought they should do. _Maybe there's a way to reach him,_ Sebastian thought desperately, and he stepped back, allowing Joseph inside. _Between the two of us, we can help him, and then...maybe...._

Sebastian closed the door behind him. Joseph noticed but he didn't protest, instead devoting himself to a quick scan of the room. His nose wrinkled, and Sebastian was blindsided by the concern that he'd already figured out what he and Ruvik had been up to. "Joseph," he said, thinking he could preemptively explain. He followed Joseph further into the apartment. "I don't know what Mobius has told you, but I'm sure it's bullshit."

Joseph finally spotted Ruvik. His posture tightened but he controlled his reaction; he had planned for this. He was thinking and calculating, not like a brainwashed pawn but like he always did, and it was making Sebastian dizzy. Ruvik stared straight back at him, still with no hint of what he was thinking. A tense, silent confrontation seemed to pass between them, and then Joseph was turning back to Sebastian.

"After being exposed to the STEM in Beacon, I was in a coma," he said. "I spent two weeks falling in and out of that nightmare. Even now it's hard for me to sleep, thinking there's a chance I'll regress. Thanks to _him_."

He glanced to Ruvik, and Sebastian couldn't help but do the same. Ruvik didn't react or respond, so Joseph kept going. "It was Mobius that woke me up. I might not still be here at all if not for that. Maybe I don't know everything about them yet, but do remember what Ruvik put us through in that machine. Do you?"

"Of course I do," Sebastian replied immediately. "Believe me, I know exactly what he's capable of." Joseph made a face that he was too nervous to interpret, so he carried on. "But we're not in STEM anymore—Ruvik isn't our enemy here. _He_ saved _me_ from Mobius, and we're working together to try to help _you_. They didn't rescue you, Joseph, they fucking kidnapped you."

"Kidnapped?" Joseph scoffed. "I was in a federal medical facility receiving treatment. And I was at the station this morning talking to the captain—what part of that sounds like 'kidnapped' to you?"

Sebastian ground his teeth in frustration. There were agents closing in around them—they didn't have time for this shit, and Ruvik was still no help at all. "They're brainwashing you!" he insisted. "These people tried to _kill_ me, multiple times. They're _insane_ , and they're just using you to get to us. If you bring us in, all three of us are going to end up in specimen jars."

"Because you were right about the conspiracy," Joseph prodded. "Is that what you're really getting at?"

The conversation was starting to feel too familiar. Typically it ended with Joseph conceding to a "possibility" and Sebastian conflicted between feeling righteous and feeling a fool, but those didn't seem like options anymore. "I was," Sebastian said firmly. "I was right about all of it. If you'd just let us help you, I could prove it."

"You want me to leave Mobius for a different brainwasher?" Joseph squared his shoulders; he wasn't about to back down. "He'd be in my mind right now if not for Dr. Gutierrez's treatment. He could make me believe anything he wanted, couldn't he? He's still capable of that."

Sebastian made a face, but he didn't know how to answer in a way that didn't sound incriminating. "Knowing that," Joseph continued, "what makes you think you know what the truth is? You've been alone with him all this time. Everything you've learned and experienced has come from him."

"That's not what's happening," Sebastian said, leaning weight off his injured leg. "It was Mobius that chased me down and tried to kill me, and I have the bullet wounds to prove it."

"How do you know that's even what happened?" Joseph challenged. "He could have wounded you himself to keep you manageable, dependent. Would you even know the difference?"

"That's...." _That's bullshit._ Sebastian looked to Ruvik—his eyebrows were raised, but he still didn't intervene. "That's ridiculous."

Joseph took a step closer. He looked so damn sure of himself. "He created an entire world in his own mind," he said. "You think he can't convince you of a conspiracy you've been obsessed with for months? You wanted to blame someone for Lily and he gave that to you. That doesn't make it true."

Hearing the name gave Sebastian goose bumps, and he clenched his fists. "It's not like that."

"He's a monster," Joseph carried on heatedly. "He's killed hundreds of people; do you really think he cares what happens to you? He's just using you to get his power back so he can cause even more damage!"

"It's not like that!" Sebastian wavered on his feet. He couldn't say that it didn't make sense; he couldn't even say that no part of him was tempted to believe his partner's impassioned words. He waved angrily at Ruvik. "Can't you say something?"

Ruvik folded his arms. "Why should I?" he replied. "You don't need to take my word for any of it. Look at _him_." He jutted his chin at Joseph. "Is this really your partner?"

Sebastian did look. It was unmistakably Joseph: his hard but still sympathetic expression, his attempts to mask emotion with logic. But there was something off. Something in the way he stood, so utterly still, the way the corners of his mouth pinched at every word out of it. The subtle tremor in his left hand. This was Joseph, but it wasn't his partner, not completely. It was all he needed to see.

"Joseph," said Sebastian. "You're wrong. And I'm going to find a way to make you see it."

Ruvik tensed, and so did Sebastian, thinking that he had unintentionally given a signal. But then Joseph sighed, and the energy in the room changed. "I thought you'd say that," he murmured. "I knew you wouldn't listen to me." He turned toward the door. "But there is someone you might."

Ruvik frowned at his back, and his eyes grew unfocused; he was scanning the hallway. Suddenly, he went rigid. His cheeks paled anew and he let his arms fall. "Joseph," he said sharply. "Don't."

Joseph ignored him. "I know you've been waiting for this for a long time, Seb," he said as he opened the door. "I just hope it's enough to wake you up."

He motioned for someone in the hall to come forward. Sebastian prickled with apprehension but he had no idea who or what to expect. Those nerves turned to blind shock when he felt Ruvik suddenly at his back, hands twisting in his shirt. Ruvik's voice was hushed and urgent. "Whoever comes through that door, you can't believe her," he said close to Sebastian's ear. "She's just as Mobius as he is. Do you understand? _She's not your wife now_."

Sebastian's stomach dropped. "What?"

She stepped into the doorway. She was dressed in her favorite gray, her blonde hair tucked back, earrings dangling. Her face was deeply etched, each line so familiar it took his breath from his body. Every inch of her was just as he had seen her last.

Myra. She was alive. Before he could even process as much, she was coming toward him. His vision swam and he thought he might faint, but then her arms were around his neck, holding him tightly, her body swaying into his. She fit against him as she always had, and the smell of her skin made his heart beat so fiercely he thought it might force every other organ out of his chest. His limbs moved without him, encircling her, drawing her in.

"Myra...?" There were tears in his eyes and he thought he might fall apart at any moment. He could still feel Ruvik's hands against his back. "You're...?"

"I'm sorry," she said; her voice rattled him. She let go of him with one arm. "I'm so sorry, Sebastian."

He felt her move—felt Ruvik move at the same time. He didn't understand either even after he looked down. Ruvik was gripping Myra's wrist, and she in turn was gripping an encased hypodermic. Both shuddered with effort for only a moment before Myra relented, letting the needle fall to the carpet. Sebastian was slow to comprehend.

"Hello, Ruben," said Myra coolly across Sebastian's shoulder. "I've heard so much about you."

"Likewise," he replied in kind.

Sebastian squirmed between them; he couldn't see either of their faces, and having both pressed so close was turning his brain to mush. "What the hell...?"

"I've come to take you home, Sebastian," Myra said, but each word was hollow, like a poor imitation, and his skin crawled. "You don't need this anymore. Please, let me take care of you."

Ruvik's hand tightened against his back. "Don't listen to her," he said. "This isn't your wife anymore. She's one of them."

 _No_. Sebastian shook; he thought he should try to unwind from them, but his arms were numb, and the signals weren't connecting. _This isn't real, it can't be._ Desperate, he looked to Joseph, only to find him pulling the gun from his jacket. _This is so fucked._ "Myra, how are...what the fuck is going on?"

A tremor went through her, and it made him want to hold her tighter, but then she was speaking again. "Please don't worry about that now," she said against his cheek. She sounded like a stranger and he wanted to throw up. "Just come home with me. I'll help you."

"No," Ruvik snapped. "He's mine. You can't—"

He broke off abruptly. Sebastian felt the coming storm before it hit, like a flash of heat against his back. The skull-piercing noise split him open a moment later. It wasn't like what he was used to. Ruvik managed only a thin, strangled moan before he collapsed, but the entire apartment seemed to flex and wail around them. Instinctually Sebastian pulled free of Myra and turned, awkwardly catching Ruvik's arm to ease him to the floor. For brief moments he felt fire against his hands, smoke in his already watering eyes, but more than that, horror—a guilt-laden horror that turned his bone marrow to ash. Within seconds Ruvik was unconscious and seizing on the carpet.

"Ruvik!" Sebastian tried to support him, but when he looked up, two more agents were entering the room and Myra was retrieving the hypodermic from the floor. _You're fucked_ , he thought distantly. _It's over._ The gleam in Myra's eyes as she watched Ruvik suffer was downright lethal. "Myra," said Sebastian. "What the hell did you do to him?"

"He was trying to read my mind," Myra replied. "So I let him." She leaned down. "Now hold still."

She lifted the needle—the others were drawing close. The were only moments to make a decision, and Sebastian did the only thing he could: he lashed out with his foot, striking Myra's knee hard enough that she was thrown to the ground. He scooped Ruvik up, and even though his entire lower half complained with the effort, he forced himself to his feet and turned to run. There was a fire escape out the bedroom window, and it was at least a chance. He only made it three steps before Joseph fired.

He felt the shot strike him in the back. It hurt like a son of a bitch but he kept going, until his knees fell out from under him. He was just inside the bedroom when he crumbled, Ruvik spilling out of his arms, vision blurred and body swiftly going numb. As he tried to crawl, he realized that there wasn't any blood on his back, but it wasn't until Joseph approached and pulled the needle out from between his shoulder blades that he really understood what had happened.

"I'm sorry it had to be like this," said Joseph, carefully urging Sebastian to lie on his side. His voice was garbling into nonsense. "But you're going to be all right, Seb. It'll be all right now...."

 _No, not like this._ Sebastian pawed at the carpet but his strength was quickly fading, and all he could reach was the cuff of Ruvik's sweatpants. He gripped it tight. _Not after everything_.

The last thing he heard as he slipped under was Myra's voice, but he couldn't make out the words.


	14. Chapter 14

Sebastian awoke to a pounding headache and a twisting stomach. There was a heavy, metallic taste at the back of his throat that was overpowering his other senses; he had to claw his way back into consciousness, gradually becoming aware of the hard mattress beneath his back, the pressure against his ankles and wrists. When he managed to open his eyes, he was relieved to find the lights mercifully low. It gave his vision the chance to adjust and he could finally see where he was.

It looked like a hospital room. He'd seen his fair share, woken up in a few himself, and there was no mistaking the sweaty cotton gown clinging to his chest, the sensors pasted to his skin, the nearby monitors and locked cabinets. But the mirror across him from was almost certainly one-way glass, and he'd never been cuffed to the bed.

Sebastian yanked on the bindings. They weren't handcuffs; they were padded leather buckled tight, the good stuff, preventing his hands and feet from moving more than a few inches in any direction. He struggled anyway and hissed at the pins and needles rippling under his skin. He'd been there a while. When nothing budged, he lifted his gaze to the rest of the room, wondering if there was possibly anything that would help him.

He wasn't alone. He froze, every hair standing on end as he finally discovered the man seated at his bedside, who had been patiently watching him all along. His eyes gleamed eerie green in the dark.

"Good morning," said Agent Lim.

Sebastian felt his entire body clench into a fist. "Lim."

"I'm so glad you're awake." Lim stood, grinning as he stepped closer—though not close enough for Sebastian to have reached any part of him. "I was starting to think I'd lose my chance. If Gutierrez shows up for you, we'll have to put this off. The longer we put it off, and, well." He shrugged. "The less of a point there is."

Sebastian seethed, but he tried to look past Lim, scanning the bedrails, the nearby side table—there had to be something. _Ruvik?_ He squeezed his eyes shut and tried to concentrate; he took a deep breath and let his mind fall open just like when Ruvik had shown him waiting outside the bar for Kidman. _Ruvik, where are you?_ But there was only the soft clap of Lim's shoes on the tile as he moved away, and he felt like a fool for attempting it.

"Logically, I should have just done this while you were asleep," Lim prattled on as he stopped in front of the room's locked medical cabinet. "But where's the fun in that?"

Sebastian bent his knees, dragging himself down the bed, but no matter how he maneuvered, he couldn't get his teeth around the straps. He growled in frustration. "Where's Ruvik?"

"'Where's Ruvik?'" Lim parroted. "Gosh, you sound honestly concerned." He finished keying numbers into the cabinet's digital lock. "Well, a little Stockholm's Syndrome never hurt anyone, I always say."

Sebastian gave up his struggles for the time being so he could catch his breath. His brain was still full of fog, and at first he couldn't remember how he'd been captured in the first place. _Joseph found us. And Ruvik—he collapsed._ He worked his fingers and remembered the pant cuff in his grip. _Because he was trying to read…._

It came back to him like an anvil on his chest. Myra's arms around his neck—Myra's voice in his ear. She was alive. The knowledge melted his wits. "Where's Myra?" he asked hoarsely.

"Oh, she's probably with Gutierrez. Buying us time." Lim was fitting a sterile needle onto a rather wide syringe. "Poor thing." The muscles along his jaw tightened. "I hate seeing her like that."

"You…." Sebastian squirmed on the mattress; his body ached for freedom even though he had no idea what he would do with himself once he had it. "You said you killed her."

"Did I?" Lim frowned thoughtfully. "I think it's more likely that you just don't understand my sense of humor."

He set a vile in front of him, but when he went to fill the syringe, Sebastian was just enough in his right mind to realize that the needle was nowhere near it. He had deliberately turned his back to the observation window and was filling his syringe with empty air.

 _He's going to kill you._ Sweat drowned Sebastian's pores as he watched Lim tap the end of the needle and then smirk to himself. He resumed his fight, but the cuffs weren't giving way and there was nothing in reach. _After everything, he's just going to off you right here and now._ His wrists ached as he twisted and pulled. _Ruvik will be next if he's not dead already_.

"I want you to know that this wasn't my idea," Lim said as he returned, making sure to keep the syringe out of view of the window. "I mean, generally speaking. I'd much rather hand you over to the Administrator." He stopped beside the bed, still safely out of reach. "But your wife made me promise to kill you if I could, so here we are."

"You're fucking insane," Sebastian growled. He drew as far back as he could, thinking that if Lim had to reach across the bed for him, it might give him some chance. "And a liar."

Lim's eyebrow quirked. "Denial sure is grand." He held up the needle just far enough so that Sebastian could see it. "Now, this a rather large syringe," he said, and the hint of glee in his too-bright eyes turned Sebastian's stomach. "If we're lucky, the air's going to get trapped in your atrium and stop your heart with just one shot. But one's not always enough, so." He chuckled as he grabbed Sebastian's elbow. "Try, try again."

He dragged Sebastian's arm up tight against the bedrail, grip tight enough to immediately bruise. He wasn't human. Sebastian tried to fight back but he had no leverage and the best he could hope to accomplish was biting a hole in Lim's sleeve. Lim regarded his struggles with amusement, warning, "This is going to hurt."

"I'm going to fucking kill you," Sebastian snarled. "I swear to God, I'll burn every piece of meat right the hell off your body."

Lim paused. His gaze snapped to Sebastian's, waiting, as if Sebastian would make good on his threat right away. And by God did Sebastian want to. He scorched his brain with visions of his enemy writhing and screaming just like in the dream. He could make that a reality—even Lim seemed to think him capable of it, judging by the wariness in his face.

But then the moment passed, and Lim let out a tiny huff of laughter. "You'd better get started, then," he taunted, and he angled the needle toward the Sebastian's vein.

The doorknob turned. Lim reacted swiftly, letting Sebastian go and leaning back. As he faced their visitor, he tucked the syringe in the back waistband of his pants, each move so quick and effortless that even Sebastian almost missed it.

The door opened, and in stepped Joseph. Sebastian was so relieved he could have collapsed, but Lim was still too close—to both of them. "Joseph!"

Joseph glanced between them, startled, but not nearly enough to be on his guard. "Agent Lim," he greeted. "I didn't know you were here."

"Agent Hanson asked me to keep an eye on him," said Lim, sliding his hands into his pockets. Sebastian tensed, ready to shout a warning at any moment. "Didn't want him to wake up alone."

"I see. Thank you." Joseph started closer. "How long has he been up?"

"Just a few minutes."

Another step and he'd be within easy striking distance. Sebastian's heart pounded as he propped himself up as best he could. "Joseph, wait," he said, eyes dancing to Lim and his supposedly easy posture. "You can't...." He gulped. "Can I talk to you alone?"

Joseph looked surprised, but then pleased. He nodded and turned expectantly to Lim.

"You have something to say I can't hear?" Lim asked Sebastian over his shoulder.

Sebastian wound tight, but he started to panic again when Joseph finally reached the bedside. Lim was practically buzzing with lethal energy and it drove him mad that Joseph couldn't see it. "Please," Joseph said calmly. "If you don't mind."

Lim stared back at him for a long, thoughtful moment. Then he smiled. "Sure," he said, and without another word, he showed himself out, the door clicking shut behind him.

Sebastian sagged into the mattress. "Fuck," he wheezed. "You just saved my life."

Joseph pulled a face as he drew the bedside chair closer. "I don't like him much, either," he said, "but there's no need to be dramatic."

Sebastian wasn't sure whether he should laugh or cry, and he didn't manage either. "He literally just tried to kill me."

"What?" Joseph draped his suit jacket over the back of the chair and sat down. "That's absurd."

"He said so himself," Sebastian tried again. "He took a needle out of that cabinet and…." But Joseph's face was only projecting concerned sympathy, and his nerves crumbled. "Fuck. You're not going to believe anything I say about them, are you?"

"A lot of people worked very hard to bring you here safely," Joseph reasoned. "Including Agent Lim. Why would he want to kill you?"

"Because he's insane!" Sebastian rattled his shackles even knowing he wasn't going anywhere. "He's been trying to kill me this whole time! He fucking…." He shook his head. "Where's Kidman? Is she here? Ask her—she'll tell you."

Joseph reached over the bedrail to grab Sebastian's wrist. "Just calm down," he said, soothing but firm. "He's not here now, and besides, no one's going to hurt you while I'm here. All right?"

Sebastian fell still, even as his heart thumped like a bat in a cage. _They've fucked him good_ , he thought. _You're not going to be able to just talk him out of this. You need Ruvik._ He forced himself to take a few deep breaths to prove he was calm and tried to make his voice sound neutral. "Where's Ruvik?"

Joseph relaxed, letting go of Sebastian's wrist. "He's secure. You don't have to worry about him."

"What does that mean?" He shuddered with the memory he unintentionally borrowed from Ruvik's dream of biting scalpels and tugging hands. "What are they doing to him?"

"Nothing, as far as I know." Joseph leaned his forearms against the bedrail. "Dr. Gutierrez said they'd be sedating him."

Sebastian felt fresh sweat on his brow. "Sedating him?"

"They've got him sealed up in some kind of Faraday cage chamber," Joseph continued. "It should block him from using his hypnosis."

 _He's sedated._ "No," said Sebastian, his breath tangling in his lungs. _Then it's just him, alone, stuck in his own mind._ "No, you can't do that."

"He's secure," Joseph repeated. "He can't reach you here, Sebastian."

He was trying so hard to be reassuring; Sebastian was trying so hard not to vomit. _That seizure back in the apartment was bad,_ he thought, and it wasn't until Joseph took his wrist again that he realized he'd been yanking on the restraints. _If it was anything like last time, he's stuck in that nightmare._ "They have to wake him up," he said urgently. "They can't leave him like that—not with Leslie still loose."

Joseph frowned at him in confusion. "Leslie? I didn't think he still—"

"It's not really—it's complicated." Sebastian continued to twist uselessly against his handcuffs. _You promised to be there whenever he passed out_ , he couldn't stop thinking, not caring when Joseph stood up to better restrain him. _Wasn't that one of your conditions? Now all that hate of his is going to eat him alive_. "You can't leave him like that," he persisted. "Sedating him is like torture—make them wake him up!"

"You know I can't do that," said Joseph, taking Sebastian's shoulder. "Just take a deep breath, Seb. You're all right—it's going to be all right."

"No, it's…." Sebastian's fingers were tingling, and he forced himself to take Joseph's advice and let the strength go out of him. "It's fucked," he said, grimacing up at the ceiling. "We're all fucked now."

"Sebastian…." Joseph shifted back and forth; seeing his strained composure only made everything worse. "Listen," he said carefully. "I'm going to help you get through this. Once you've spent some time away from him, I'm sure it'll start to wear off, and you'll feel like yourself again. We just have to be patient."

"I'll feel like myself," Sebastian muttered. The room around them suddenly felt impossibly small and suffocating. He laughed bitterly. "The hell does that even mean?"

"I know that must sound crazy now, but it's going to get better, I promise." Joseph hesitated a moment before continuing. "Maybe what Ruvik put me through isn't anything like what he's done to you, but I know what it feels like to not have control of your own body."

The words made Sebastian's skin crawl. He looked up into his partner's face and went flush with shame. _Does he know?_ The pinch of Joseph's eyebrows could have meant anything. _Whoever ratted you out might not have only mentioned screams._

Sebastian opened his mouth, but he couldn't conceive of the words let alone get them out. He tried several times beneath Joseph's agonizingly patient stare before he managed to say, "It's not what you think."

"You don't have to explain," Joseph said quickly. "I know."

"No, you don't! He didn't…." Sebastian growled as he fought for coherency. "He's not what you think he is," he said dizzily. "He's not just some monster, all right? They tortured him—they burned him alive, and his sister—"

"I know what's in his past," Joseph interrupted. "That doesn't excuse any of the things he's done.

"I know it doesn't!" Sebastian snapped. "I'm just telling you, he's not—it wasn't like that!"

Joseph shook his head, frustration getting the better of him, too. "We shouldn't talk about this now. You've still got too much of him in your system."

Sebastian cringed—that much was true. He was still deeply sore in the worst places and Ruvik's fingerprints were all over the inside of his skin. He wondered if maybe Joseph could smell it on him. "Where's Kidman?" he asked again, desperate to change the subject. "I want to talk to her."

"She's busy, but I'm sure she'll come see you soon. She's worried about you." Joseph sat back down, and every part of him grew heavier. "We _all_ are."

Sebastian felt that weight clearly, pressing down on his chest as if he were at the bottom of the ocean. Or maybe it was just a woman's arms wrapped around his neck. "Myra," he said. It was all he could get out.

"She's here," said Joseph, leaning his forearms against the bedrail. "And she was asking about you, but I don't think she's ready to see you yet. Not while you're...like this."

Sebastian blinked at him; the words sounded like another language, and he couldn't get past the first part. "She's here," he repeated. Even with the memory of her breath against his ear so close, he had to ask, "She's alive?"

"Yes." Joseph smiled thinly. "She's okay, Seb. I'm sure once you're both up to it, she'll want to talk."

Sebastian tried to tell himself to stay calm, but his heart was up in his throat again, strangling his attempts at steady breath. _She's not okay,_ he thought. _Not any more than he is. Mobius has had her all along._ He clenched his teeth until they ached and fought the urge to yank at his shackles. _They've brainwashed her just like him._ Anger seethed up through his skin, but the air was still so heavy, and he couldn't sustain any one emotion; he felt as if he were stacking and crumbling blocks over and over.

"She's...." Sebastian squeezed his eyes shut; it was too hard to ponder anything with Joseph looking at him like that, so compassionately. "She's been here the whole time?"

"I haven't been able to get many answers out of her," Joseph admitted. "But yes, I think so. I hate to say it, but…."

"'I told you so'?" Sebastian grimaced. "Fuck."

Joseph sighed. "That's not what I was going to say, but…yes." Sebastian could hear the leather of his gloves crinkle, but he still couldn't look. "Myra always did get along better with the FBI than any of us. They've offered her a job more than once, remember? I guess she finally decided to take it."

 _They're not the FBI_. Sebastian ground his teeth, and tried to grind his ears as well—he didn't want to listen to any more. _They didn't 'offer' her a job, they fucking kidnapped her._

"It wasn't fair of her to leave without telling you," Joseph continued. How dare he sound so damn reasonable. "And I think she knows that. But you were both so devastated after the accident, maybe putting some distance between her and it was the only way she knew how to cope."

Sebastian was sure that if he opened his mouth, he'd be sick. _Accident_ , he thought, the word drilling through his veins. He remembered Lim among the barbs spitting out a confession. _He said he promised Myra he would._ He pictured Lim's hand against his daughter's back and ached to tear to world down. _No fucking accident._

"Shut up," he muttered, exerting steady, angry pressure against his cuffs.

But Joseph was still talking. "I know how hard it was for you, losing her," he said as if begging for hands around his neck. "You know I do. And you have the right to be angry, just try to remember when you see her—"

"Just shut up," Sebastian hissed. _They killed your daughter, kidnapped your wife, all while you were getting drunk and feeling sorry for yourself, you fucking asshole._ "Just stop."

"—that it's been just as hard for her, too. But I know she still cares about you. It's not too late for you both to—"

"Shut the fuck up!" he shouted, fire in his throat. "Just shut up—you don't know what the hell you're talking about!"

Joseph did stop, but feeling him lean back from the bed didn't make Sebastian feel any better. After a few long breaths, a struggle for calm, he finally opened his eyes. Joseph was making that pained face he knew so well—the one that said, "I'm hurt, but I'm going to forgive you for that later because I know you're drunk right now." He'd seen it too many times and it made him feel even worse.

Sebastian licked his lips. "Joseph," he said, still wrestling with composure he couldn't quite pin down. "I'm sorry."

"It's okay," Joseph said, like clockwork. "I know you're not yourself right now." He looked away. "I shouldn't be pushing you."

 _No, it's not like that, either._ Sebastian quivered with frustration, but nothing he wanted to scream would change anything, and he couldn't shake the sense into his partner even if his arms had been free. "No," he insisted. "I mean, I'm sorry." He waited until Joseph was looking at him again to continue. "You're right—I know you know. You've had my back when no one else has. And I know I…." The admission was too true, and too long in coming, for Sebastian to get it out all at once. Why was it so much easier to say to Ruvik than the man himself? He swallowed and tried again. "I've taken that for granted. And I've taken advantage of it, too. I've been shitty to you and I'm sorry."

He opened his hand to him as best he could. Joseph's shoulders fell, and his expression twisted with a softer but no less painful emotion. "You don't have to apologize," he said, taking Sebastian's hand and squeezing it tight. Sebastian did his best not to look at the splash of red on the back of his glove. "You've been through hell. And to be honest…." Joseph smiled through a grimace of his own. "As far as I'm concerned, I'm returning a favor. You've always had _my_ back, too." He took a deep breath, working up to something. "I don't think you know just how much that meant to me when we first started out."

Sebastian couldn't help but smile tight with the memory of rookie Joseph Oda, shaking his hand for the first time on one of the best nights of his life. Of skinny shoulders trembling under his arm as they left the grisly scene of their first case together. "No, I know," he assured him. "I knew."

Joseph looked relieved and embarrassed at once, and with one more squeeze he cleared his throat and leaned back again. "Can I get you something?" he asked. "I don't know if you're allowed to eat anything yet, but you're probably thirsty."

"Yeah," Sebastian replied. "I could use a whiskey."

"That's not funny." Joseph pushed to his feet. "You're getting water."

Before he could go anywhere, Sebastian rattled his cuff. "Hey. Can you at least untie one of my hands?" When Joseph looked hesitant, he added, "I don't want to have to drink out of a sippy cup."

"I'll find you a straw," said Joseph. "Those are there for your own safety, you know."

"I know, but...I'm okay right now, and it's not like I'm going anywhere." Sebastian wriggled his bare feet. "Come on, Joseph, unless you want to scratch the itch on my balls."

Joseph scoffed loudly, but he did relent. "Only for a minute," he said as he took Sebastian's wrist, undoing the buckle. "So you can drink."

"And scratch," Sebastian reminded him. He slipped his hand free and gave it a shake, wincing. "Shit, that's going to rot my fingers off."

"Your fingers are fine," Joseph scolded. He headed for a sink against the far wall. "Stop squirming so much and it won't hurt."

As soon as his back was turned, Sebastian rolled to his other side. "I like this hand," he said, doing his best impersonation of casual as he began unbuckling the second wrist strap. "I do lots of things with it—I gotta be careful."

Joseph pulled a Styrofoam cup out from under the sink. "I can't believe you're making jokes now," he said. "Whatever spell Ruvik had you…."

He glanced back just as Sebastian got his second hand free. "Hey." With a long-suffering sigh he came back. "I told you—"

"I don't need them." Sebastian tried to bend his knees, but the angle his ankles had been restrained at made it hard to drag himself far down enough. "I'm not going anywhere, I just want to—"

Joseph took his elbow. It was just where Lim had grabbed him and all at once his panic was back—he needed to get out. He needed to find Ruvik, and kill that asshole Lim, find Myra, escape—he _needed_ to get out. He twisted against Joseph's grip but he couldn't break free. "Let go!"

"Sebastian, stop," said Joseph. He put his hand on Sebastian's shoulder and tried to urge him back. "This isn't helping."

He was stronger than he had any business being, and that only made Sebastian more desperate. He was aware all over again of how much was at stake and how little he could afford to be strapped to a hospital bed, vultures in the halls. "Get off!" he snarled, and with all his strength he put both hands to Joseph's chest and shoved.

Joseph fell back, but he managed to catch his balance before toppling entirely. He was back too soon, hooking his arm under Sebastian's armpit so he could haul him back up the bed.

"Let go!" Sebastian shouted as he fought. He pried at Joseph's fingers, and when that didn't help, he beat against his shoulder and chest. "You don't understand—we have to get out of here!"

Joseph pushed Sebastian onto his back and then grabbed his wrist, trying to get his hand in the strap again. Sebastian continued to struggle, and when his fist caught Joseph's jaw he reared back, his glasses clattering to the floor. It was like a switch being thrown. Without a word Joseph climbed onto the bed, pinning Sebastian's chest beneath his knee and driving the breath from his lungs. He devoted both hands to driving Sebastian's right back in the restraints.

"Joseph," Sebastian wheezed, but Joseph only pressed more weight on him, until he could barely take in a breath. His body retreated to instinct and all he could do was push ineffectively at Joseph's waist with his one free hand. "Sto…stop, I can't…."

Once Joseph was finished with the one, he twisted, digging the vital monitors into Sebastian's skin. It took him a moment to catch Sebastian's hand as it flapped and clawed, but he managed to wrestle it into the leather cuff. He yanked both straps tight and then climbed off.

Sebastian gasped and coughed. "Fuck…." His hands were throbbing, but holding still made him feel too much like he was utterly screwed, so he went back to yanking on the cuffs. "God damn it, Joseph!"

"Stop it!" Joseph hollered, gripping the bedrail as he caught his own breath. "Just stop already—I'm trying to help you!"

"I know you are!" Sebastian hollered back. "But you're not! You're gonna get us all killed, you stupid shit!"

Joseph's face screwed up, and he looked ready to let Sebastian have it, but he managed to calm himself down. With a weary sigh he pushed his hair back and picked up his glasses. The defeat in his sagged shoulders churned Sebastian's insides with guilt, up until he realized that Joseph was heading for the door.

"Wait," he called after him. "Where are you going?"

"Not far," Joseph replied numbly. "I'm going to find out when you can eat, while you cool off."

"No, wait." Sebastian's abdomen burned with the effort of sitting up. "Don't go. I can't be here alone."

"You'll be fine—I'll only be a while."

Sebastian's pulse sped the closer Joseph got to the door; it was like he was miles away. "Joseph, don't leave me here alone with Lim!"

Joseph stopped at the door and turned back with a roll of his eyes. "Sebastian, he's not going to—"

"He killed Lily." It hurt so much to say there might as well have been a knee in his chest again, but at least it got Joseph's attention. "He set the fire. He told me himself." Joseph's eyes were wide, but Sebastian continued before he could open his mouth. "Maybe that's just what Ruvik wants me to think, but right now, I believe it. So don't leave me alone with him." He slumped onto one elbow as he stared Joseph down. "Because if I'm right, he'll kill me as soon as he gets the chance, but if I'm wrong, _I'll_ fucking kill _him_. I'll tear his throat out with my teeth if I have to."

Joseph's grim expression showed he at least believed Sebastian wasn't bluffing. "Okay," he said. "I'll be right outside." He stepped out, closing the door behind him.

Sebastian dropped onto his back once more. He closed his eyes in hopes that the room would stop spinning, but no such luck. _It's not his fault_ , he told himself as he waited for his pulse to calm. _They've changed him. But Ruvik can fix him—he promised._ He let the breath tumble out of him. _Ruvik. Don't you dare be dead._

***

Joseph let the door click shut behind him and then leaned his back against it. He was still rattled after the brief scuffle, but worse was the terrible pressure threading through his ribs. When he took his glasses off to rub his eyes, he realized his hands were still shaking. Sebastian at his worst had never been easy to deal with, but he hadn't been as prepared as he'd thought when it came to handling the fractured results of Ruvik's mind control.

 _It's not his fault,_ he told himself, willing the ache in his chest to subside. _Ruvik's been in his mind for too long—but he'll get better. He just needs time._

"It must be hard," said Lim.

Joseph startled, quickly putting his glasses back on. Agent Lim was leaning against the wall opposite him, hands in the pockets of his suit jacket, a sympathetic wince twisting his features. He had to have been there the entire time. Joseph swallowed down a rush of ill ease and gathered himself up as best he could. "Excuse me?"

"Seeing him like that," Lim elaborated. "He was your partner, right? I've heard he's a tough son of a bitch, but apparently no one goes up against Ruvik and walks away unscathed."

"Apparently," said Joseph. "But he _is_ tough." His fists clenched. "And he's _still_ my partner."

Lim's mouth quirked. "Of course." He pushed away from the wall. "You look tired. Want me to keep an eye on him while you freshen up? Pretty sure you haven't slept since he came in."

Goose bumps rippled up the back of Joseph's neck. He didn't believe in Sebastian's paranoia, he didn't. Even so he found himself too quick to answer. "No, thanks. I want to stay with him at least until Gutierrez comes to make her assessment."

Lim was too still. "You sure? There's an open room just down the hall if you wanted to take a nap."

"I'm fine," said Joseph firmly. "I'm not leaving him."

"Okay, okay." Lim shrugged, though there was nothing careless about it. "I was just offering." He hesitated for a beat that had Joseph growing tense, but then he turned down the hall. "I'll see you around, Oda."

"Likewise," Joseph replied. He watched Lim move away and didn't finally let his guard down until he'd turned the corner.

 _What the hell was that?_ Joseph leaned back against the door again, needing the support. He found himself replaying their short conversation in his mind, trying to remember just where Lim had been and how he'd looked when he first entered Sebastian's room. Then he shook his head. _He's definitely unsettling but that doesn't make him a murderer_ , he thought, willing himself to believe it. _I can't let Sebastian's ramblings get to me. He doesn't mean what he's saying._ He sighed. _Including that apology._

He stayed there for a few minutes, just collecting himself. Twice he glanced through the observation window to make sure Sebastian wasn't trying anything, and was relieved to see him resting more or less quietly. Just as he was gaining the courage to re-enter, he heard footsteps approaching. For a split second he feared it might be Lim again, but when the entourage turned the corner, his heart thumped for an entirely different reason.

Tatiana and Anvi were headed his way, and with them three broad-shouldered security guards with batons. Anvi was guiding a wheelchair that sported more leather restraints. The sight of it made Joseph prickle with a sensation of déjà vu he couldn't explain.

"Oh, Agent Oda," Tatiana greeted as they approached. "Good, I'm glad you're here." She motioned for him to step away from the door, and he did so. "Maybe you can help us make this transition as smooth as possible."

Joseph eyed guards as one stepped forward to open the door. "Is this all really necessary?" he asked.

"One can't be too careful," Tatiana replied. "I've seen what he's capable of, whether he means it or not."

She moved into the room, followed closely by her guards and then Anvi and the wheelchair. Joseph took one last deep breath to steel himself before he joined them.

***

Sebastian was feeling out the bedrail in search of a screw that could potentially be removed when the door opened, and a procession walked in. He recognized Tatiana immediately, and while the guards surrounding her were a concern, they were nothing compared to the wheelchair that was with them. His heart began to pound, though he did his best to keep that apprehension out of his face.

"Gutierrez," said Sebastian warily. "Am I going somewhere?"

"It's time for your treatment," said Tatiana as she unlocked the room's medical cabinet. She noticed the bottle that Lim had placed ahead of the rest and she paused for a moment, scrutinizing, before putting it back in its place. As Sebastian debated over whether it would do any good to rat Lim out, she selected a different vial and a fresh syringe. "You've spent a long time in Ruvik's 'care' and we need to understand what kind of effect that's had on you."

"I'll bet." Sebastian watched like a hawk as Tatiana filled the syringe and then headed toward him. "You're not sticking me with that."

"It's going to help you remain calm," said Tatiana, in her characteristically cool monotone. Two of the guards flanked her while a third moved to the other side of the bed. "Just relax, Detective Castellanos. We're going to take excellent care of you."

"You're not sticking me with that," Sebastian repeated, but then the guards took hold of his arms, pinning him to the mattress. He struggled fiercely, though ineffectively. "Get the fuck off me!" He looked from one to the next and finally spotted Joseph moving to the foot of the bed. "Joseph! Don't let her give me that!"

But Joseph only gave Sebastian's foot a reassuring squeeze. "Relax," he said, maddeningly calm. "Please just listen to her, okay? It's for your own good."

"You stupid…asshole…!" Sebastian growled. He couldn't help a stirring feeling of betrayal as Tatiana pierced his inner arm with the needle, administering the drug. "God damn it…. God damn it!"

"Hush now," Tatiana scolded. "It's not that bad." She pulled the needle out and stepped back, allowing a new woman to put a quick bandage over the puncture. "Take a moment to let it sink in, hm?"

The guards let go, but they didn't back off. Sebastian glowered at each of them, sizing them up, as the drug burned its way up his arm. "Fuck," he muttered, flexing his fingers against the sting. It wasn't the same as the sedative that had taken him out in the apartment; it made everything sour, not just his sense of taste, but _everything_. It felt as if his eyeballs were swimming in it, and they rolled back and forth until landing again on Joseph.

He looked so damn empathetic and concerned, that Joseph. It made him sick to think of what face he'd make once he realized what he was doing. He blamed himself for too much already. It was going to take a lot of work to turn him around once they got away. _If_ they got away.

Sebastian sank into the mattress. "I sure hope we get to laugh about this someday," he murmured.

Joseph started to reply him, but something held him back. His look of discomfort actually gave Sebastian some hope.

The second woman reached across the bedrail and began removing the sensors from Sebastian's body. He tried to watch her work, but even the slight movements of her hands were too swift for him to follow; everything was growing bright and blurred. Instead he focused on her face, and the lines of her features coalesced into familiar patterns. "It's Shah, isn't it?" he asked her, remembering Ruvik's sketch. "Ruvik told me about you."

She looked surprised. "Did he?" When she smiled, it almost looked as if she were blushing. "I'm flattered he remembers me. I served as his assistant a few times."

 _Assistant. She helped him cut them up._ "You learn anything from him?"

Anvi finished placing the sensors aside. "Yes, quite a bit," she said. "I enjoyed watching him work."

Sebastian made a face at her. "That must make you pretty sick."

"Detective," Tatiana interrupted. "How are you feeling?

"Like I'm gonna puke," he grumbled. "Either I need a bucket or I _will_ need a fresh dress."

"Both can be easily arranged," Tatiana replied smartly. "Do you think you're calm enough for us to move you to the chair?"

He snorted. "Let me loose and find out."

Tatiana nodded to the guards. Each of them took to a strap, Joseph handling his right foot. Sebastian closed his eyes briefly, telling himself not to fight just because the restraints were growing slack. It was six against one—fighting at all was probably a wasted effort. Once the cuffs were off and the side rail lowered, he sat up carefully, not completely faking a wobble as blood struggled to climb to his brain. His toes touched the cold tile floor.

 _You're not getting out of this_ , he thought as the guards took his arms to help him up. He glanced up and saw that Joseph was tense, anticipating him. _You're wasting your time._

__

He fought anyway. As soon as he had even a little stability he lashed out in animalistic desperation, driving his elbow hard into the closet's man's throat. The stranger fell back, and Sebastian wrenched free of the second, but Joseph was already moving and he had vivid memories of all that police takedown training they shared. But he didn't stop, propelling himself away from the bed.

Tatiana kicked him hard in his left knee. The drug buzzing through his system made it so much worse, and as he buckled, she grabbed his wrist and spun him around, twisting his arm behind his back. With very little effort she had him bent over the hospital bed, his face shoved into the sweaty sheets.

"Now, now" she said, and when he struggled, one of the guards joined her in keeping him pinned. "There's no need for that."

Sebastian growled curses into the bed, bare feet scraping the floor as he continued to fight back. Then another guard joined them, the extra weight shoving the bed rail into his stomach and making him gag. But it wasn't until Joseph took Tatiana's place that he accepted the fight was really over.

"Easy, Seb," said Joseph. "No one wants to hurt you."

They hauled him backwards, all at once, and Sebastian only managed an ungraceful squawk as he was heaved into the wheelchair. He tried to claw himself out of it, but they were already at his wrists, strapping them down, and he didn't have the strength to prevent it. By the time they reached his ankles he had given up for the moment.

 _Save your strength,_ he thought, though even in his own mind he doubted it would help. _Eventually they'll have to pull you out of this. Fight then._ He glared at Tatiana as she finished securing his feet. "I liked you better inside STEM," he muttered. "And that's saying something."

Tatiana paused, betraying a moment of honest curiosity. She straightened up. "You saw me inside the STEM?" she asked.

"Yeah." Sebastian wriggled in the chair; he couldn't move much, but there had to be some position more comfortable than the rest. "You were _charming_."

Tatiana looked extremely thoughtful, but then she shook herself and motioned to her helpers. "All right, let's go," she said, unlocking the chair's wheels. She stepped back and allowed Anvi to guide the chair outside, the guards taking up flanking positions as soon as they were in the hall. Joseph fell into step behind them.

"So where are we going?" Sebastian asked. He tried to keep an eye on the scenery they were passing, but everything was just white walls and locked doors, one after the next, and the hallway fluorescents were hurting his eyes. "A stroll through the atrium?"

"I already told you," Tatiana replied. "You're going in for treatment."

"Treatment like what you did for Joseph? No thanks."

"He hasn't complained."

"No." Sebastian stewed in bitterness. "I guess you've made sure of that."

They turned the corner at the end of the hall, and there almost ran right into Juli. She looked like she had been in a rush, and her eyes wide with comprehension of what was happening filled Sebastian with an almost manic elation. They weren't on to her yet. When he realized that it might have shown in his face, he leaned far forward. _Don't you rat her out in front of Gutierrez_ , he told himself, only to feel the words themselves in his mouth. He coughed and sputtered to keep from saying anything.

The procession didn't halt, so Juli moved aside and then fell into step at Sebastian's left. "Are you taking him to Lab 4?" she asked. "Isn't it kind of soon for that?"

"This is just the preliminary phase," Tatiana replied coolly. "I'm sure he can handle himself."

Sebastian was still having a difficult time focusing, but he didn't have to see Juli to feel her anxiety. She was thinking of interfering, but between the three guards, two doctors, and Joseph still frustratingly entrenched, both of them knew their odds were crap. Even if she could have gotten him out of the chair somehow, he wasn't convinced he could run well enough to keep up with her. They needed to wait for a cleaner moment.

"Hey, Juli," he said, pushing against the armrests. "When they're through with me, how about you bring me some whiskey?"

Juli snorted, but she got the message. "Sure, boss. On ice." She nodded to Tatiana and then stepped back, letting them carry on without her.

"Thanks." Sebastian hunkered down in the chair once more. _It's more important that she stay safe,_ he thought. _There'll be other chances. Just keep your head a while longer._

***

Juli dug her fingernails into her palm as she watched the group move away. _You can't stop wondering, can you?_ Lim's voice floated out from her memories. _What could they be doing to him in there?_ She took a deep breath and tried to force the questions from her mind. Sebastian wouldn't fall for their bullshit. If Ruvik hadn't been able to control him, there was no chance of Mobius succeeding.

As she watched, Tatiana slowed and then drew Joseph to a halt with her. They shared a few words, Joseph frowning deeply, and when she continued on, he didn't follow. Juli waited a few beats more to make sure Tatiana was out of earshot before moving to join him. _I can't help Sebastian right now_ , she thought. _But maybe Joseph…_

Joseph didn't look as she approached, instead watching Sebastian move further away. His brow was knit, though not with the same kind of piercing concern Juli was trying to hide. She stopped next to him. "She told you not to watch, huh?" she asked.

"I'm not sure I want to anyway," Joseph admitted quietly. "It's so hard to see him like this." He shook his head. "But if it would help him for me to be there...."

 _That's not what this is about!_ Juli had to clench her teeth to keep from screaming; she wanted to shake him until something rattled loose. _Isn't there anything I can say that will reach him?_

"Joseph," she said carefully. "I know you think I'm paranoid, but—"

"He said that Agent Lim tried to kill him in his room," Joseph interrupted suddenly, and she went cold. "But that's crazy, right? Why would he?"

Juli tried not to fidget. Even with Tatiana and the rest far away, the hall around them empty, that didn't mean no one was around to hear. "If you feel the need to ask me, doesn't that say enough?"

Joseph frowned deeper and didn't look about to answer, so Juli took a chance and touched his shoulder. "We can ask Sebastian about it again once he's out," she suggested. "Let's go wait in his room, okay? The three of us always managed to work things out."

"Yeah." Joseph nodded, letting her lead him back toward the recovery room. "Yeah, we did." He gave his chest a rub, wincing, but then he straightened up and didn't say another word.

***

By the time they reached the lab, most of Sebastian's nausea had passed. Everything was still too bright, and his eyes were dry and almost swollen, but at least he felt that he would be able to keep his balance, if only he could get to his feet. As Anvi pushed him through the double entrance doors, he leaned back, determined to take in as much of the room as he could. After the horrors he'd witnessed at Beacon he was convinced no madman's laboratory would ever spook him again.

But once he was inside the circular room, once he saw what they were leading him toward, his stomach dropped. Rolling curtains had sectioned off the lab's center, where an apparatus lay beneath the harsh lighting: a chair made of metal, adorned in leather straps and needles on the ends of long, plastic tubes. A pair of arm-like extensions arched over the chair's back, bracing between them a headpiece bearing more needles, more tubes. The surfaces might have been polished cleaner than the monstrosity he remembered from inside STEM, but it was no less intimidating, and his skin crawled.

"You're not putting me in that," he said automatically.

A man and a woman stepped out from behind one of the curtains. The man was the long-faced, heavy-browed Administrator that Sebastian recognized from Ruvik's drawing, but it was the woman that made Sebastian's heart crawl up his throat.

He tried to swallow it down. "Myra…?"

She was wearing the same gray suit she had at the apartment, and there were bags under her eyes further confirming a long, sleepless night. But even the bare hints of affection and sympathy she had fixed on him then were gone. Her expression was utterly devoid of any namable emotion, even indifference. She was barely there at all. The last time he had seen her like that, it was while they watched a tiny casket being lowered into the earth.

The guard that Sebastian had elbowed stepped forward, and without warning he punched Sebastian hard across the jaw. Sebastian rocked against his straps, unprepared and completely dazed, preventing him from fighting back as the men unbuckled him from the wheelchair. He started to regain himself once he was being moved, but there were too many, and his brain already too garbled, for him to stage a proper resistance. He shoved and twisted, but in the end they wrestled him into the chair, binding his wrists and ankles again.

"Fuck you," he growled as another strap was tightened across his chest. "Let me out of this thing!"

Tatiana stepped forward. Unlike the wraith he remembered from inside STEM, there was a gleam in her eyes betraying an almost Ruvik-like anticipation for whatever horror she was about to subject him to. "Hold still," she said, reaching across him. Before he could even contemplate making good on his earlier threat to use teeth, she drew another strap across his throat. She secured it so tightly that he almost couldn't breathe, and as he choked, she tugged the headpiece down.

Sebastian was too well bound to make it difficult for her; he could only cough and sputter as the metal squealed closer. The crown dug into his scalp as it was positioned and then tightened in place, cold and unyielding. His temples ached with the vice-like pressure and his ears rung with electricity. Once it was secure, Tatiana loosened the neck strap enough that he could breathe clearly again, but it was no comfort at all.

 _Keep it together_ , Sebastian told himself, but everything hurt, his heart was scrambling, and he was chained to some scientific abomination prepared to do God-only-knew-what to him. Panic was looking better all the time. He spotted Myra again, but her arms were folded and her head was turned away. She wouldn't look at him.

The chair began to whirr. Sebastian couldn't see what it was up to, but he certainly felt when Tatiana guided two more syringes into his veins, one for each forearm. He tried not to wince as a fresh batch of the burning drugs was pumped into him. It raced through his system and made everything blazing and nauseating again.

Tatiana pulled the hospital gown away from Sebastian's chest, applying fresh sensors to his skin. Once she was finished, she stepped out of his line of sight. "He's ready for you," she said.

The man in the black suit came forward. He was dragging a chair, the scrape of it on the tile floor piercing Sebastian's eardrums as he positioned it just in front of his prey. He unbuttoned his jacket and sat down. "Castellanos," he said. "Do you know who I am?"

Sebastian squinted against the lights. "Go fuck yourself, _Adam_."

"Administrator," he corrected, though with a deliberate pause as if in an effort not to sound defensive. "You know, I wondered for a long time if you and I would ever have the chance to meet."

" _This_ is not a meeting," Sebastian retorted. He twisted his wrists against the cuffs. "Let me out of this thing, and we can _really_ get to know each other."

"Cute." Adam leaned forward. "But I really don't think you'd enjoy that any more than the situation you're currently in."

He looked so damn serious, Sebastian had to laugh. It made the strap dig into his neck and he didn't care. "You stupid asshole," he said. "I just spent the last week in the company of the devil. You really think I'm scared of _you_?"

"Maybe not," Adam conceded. "But I do think you're scared of _her_."

He nodded toward Myra, and when Sebastian looked, he had to admit, his heart skipped. She turned to face him, and her utter lack of expression turned his blood cold. He swallowed hard and didn't know how to react.

"I know what you're thinking," said Adam.

Sebastian clenched his hands into fists. "The fuck you do."

"You're thinking that I took her from you. That I kidnapped and brainwashed her just like your partner." Sebastian drew his attention back to him, wishing he could punch his face right the hell in. "Maybe you're trying to think of some precious memory you share," Adam went on. "A personal anecdote that would help her remember, and then she'd snap out of it, and you two could break out of here and go home together. Is that what you're thinking?"

"I'm thinking," Sebastian retorted, seething, "of how slowly I'm going to kill you once I'm out of this chair."

Adam wasn't moved. "There's nothing you can do to save her," he continued. "You can't get her back because she was never yours to begin with. Myra is one of us, and always has been."

"Fuck you," Sebastian barked. "I'm not falling for your bullshit mind games."

"This isn't a game, Castellanos," Adam replied coldly. "This is the truth. Myra was born here, among us. She and I share a grandmother—we're family. Whatever story she told you about her late parents from North Carolina, her private school upbringing—all of that was a lie."

 _Don't believe him._ Sebastian tried to shake his head, but the crownpiece prevented him. _He's a fucking liar._ He felt as if his fingers were going numb from how tightly he was squeezing them. "That's not true."

"She joined KCPD because _I_ asked her to," said Adam, each word out of his mouth making the air harder to breathe. "She married you because _I_ gave her permission. She's destroyed evidence and silenced witnesses on _my_ orders. Everything she's done since before you knew her has been for the betterment of Mobius."

"Not everything," said Myra.

Sebastian flinched. He tried to take some relief from her words, but her voice was as still and lifeless as her eyes. _Remember what Ruvik said_ , he reminded himself, licking his lips. _She's not really herself now, you just have to have faith. Right?_ "Myra?"

Adam leaned back in his chair. "No, not everything," he agreed. "Would you like to explain that one to him? Or should I?"

Myra turned her head away again. "Go ahead."

"Myra," said Sebastian, straining against his bindings as if he could draw her eyes back to him. "I don't want to talk to him— _you_ talk to me. Tell me he's full of shit."

She didn't react. "I was against her pregnancy," Adam resumed in her stead. "I was concerned that it would hamper her duties inside the department and create a conflict of interests. But I let her keep the baby. Gutierrez convinced me it would be more trouble than it was worth to force her to abort."

"You…." Sebastian ground his teeth as he glared daggers into the uncaring asshole in front of him. He ached so badly to have his hands around the bastard's throat he felt as if his insides were tearing each other apart, and he'd start vomiting blood at any moment. "You sick son of a—"

"But I was right. When we couldn't ignore her distraction any longer, I warned her that things would change."

"So it was you." Sebastian imagined, with all the sick determination he could manage, Adam bursting into red flames. If only Ruvik were there to help him make it a reality. "You sicced your mad dog on our daughter."

"Not quite." Adam nodded to Myra once more. "Tell him, Myra."

Myra didn't move. Sebastian began to sweat all over again and he wasn't sure why; his entire body was suddenly so cold. She hadn't even spoken yet and denials were running back and forth through his brain. "Tell him," Adam said again. "It was your choice; it's your responsibility."

"Tell me," added Sebastian. "Tell me he's lying, Myra."

Myra finally drew her attention back. She even stepped closer, and Sebastian held his breath as the rest of the room with its guards, and doctors, and even the straps around his wrists ceased to matter. "The Administrator asked me to withdraw from KCPD," she said. "I had already filed a report with him explaining that you would be a poor fit for Mobius, and wouldn't submit easily to conditioning. He decided it would be easiest to kill you."

Sebastian shuddered dizzily in the chair. _That's not her_ , he told himself again, but his mind and memories were blurring together, and he suddenly couldn't remember what she was supposed to sound like. "No," wheezed. "No, you…you didn't."

"I didn't want that," Myra continued, and the slight tremble in her voice only made him sicker. "I wanted to stay where I was, as your wife. But the Administrator had already made it clear that things couldn't continue as they were." Her arms tightened around each other. "So when Agent Lim told me he had been ordered to kill you, I asked him to do me a favor instead."

"No." Sebastian shrank back as horror coursed through him. "No, stop."

"I canceled the plans I had made with the other detectives from work, and I asked Juanita to babysit so you and I could have dinner instead." She gathered herself up as Adam and Tatiana looked on, silently patient. "I told her that Lily had a cold, and left out some medicine to give her before bed."

Sebastian's eyes burned, his throat burned. He could feel Ruvik's screams vibrating in his lungs. "Oh my God...."

"And I...." Myra gulped, hesitating. "I drugged it," she said at last, and Sebastian was half convinced he crumbled into pieces. "I laced it with doxepine so she would sleep. I made Ye-Jun promise to handle Juanita and set the fire, and he did."

 _No, no._ Sebastian squeezed his eyes shut, but the lab fluorescents blazed through his eyelids, painting a vivid scene of a burning home against his retinas. _No. No._ "I...." His voice broke with a sound of pain. "I don't believe you."

"She suffocated in her sleep," said Myra quietly. "She never woke up. It was as peaceful as I could—"

"I don't believe you! I don't—I can't—" Sebastian tried to take a breath but his chest was tight and seizing, his fingers going numb. His every instinct was thwarted—he couldn't fight back or retreat, couldn't cover his ears or rip Adam's throat out, couldn't even breathe. "You're lying!" he choked out. "You couldn't...oh God, I...." As he yanked helplessly at his bindings, he turned his hateful eyes on Adam.

" _You_." He pushed so hard against the straps he almost cut off his own air. "You did this to her—I'll kill you! I'll fucking—"

The chair beneath him jolted, and a spark of electricity passed through the crown, lighting him up with a searing pain unlike anything he'd ever felt before. His entire body convulsed with the blow and his every thought was instantly stripped away. It only lasted a moment, but even the aftershocks were agony, and he couldn't keep from vomiting.

Tatiana was beside him, holding a basin under his chin as if she'd expected it. His stomach didn't have much to offer, and once he'd stopped retching she handed the small tub to an assistant and wiped the sick from his face with a cloth. He didn't have enough of his wits back to resist.

"Do you understand what she's telling you?" asked Adam, his voice beating against Sebastian's eardrums. "I ordered her to kill you, but she chose to spare you instead. She killed your little girl, Castellanos."

"I don't…." Sebastian coughed, and even after couldn't get a proper breath in without gagging. "I don't believe you."

"She just told you herself. You think she's lying?"

"It was Lim," Sebastian said hoarsely. "He said so, he said—"

"Lim is a good dog," Adam interrupted. "You point him at something and he takes care of it. But sometimes he forgets who's holding his leash." He tilted his chin up. "Tell him one more time, Myra. Tell him what a good boy Agent Lim is to you."

Sebastian tried to look at her, but he was only able to make out smears of light and shadow through his watering eyes. Then he heard the clap of her shoes as she moved away. "Myra?" he called after her, but he couldn't turn his head to follow her gray shades leaving the room. "Myra!"

"You can deny it as long as you like," said Tatiana, pushing on Sebastian's chin to keep him from squirming. "But it doesn't change what happened to Lily."

Sebastian's lips pulled back from his teeth. "Don't you fucking say her name."

"You think we wanted her dead? She should have been here, with us: her real family."

"She's dead because of you," Adam took over again, and the words pierced straight through Sebastian's chest. "You must have thought that plenty of times. Maybe you'd gone home sooner, you could have saved her, for example? But now you know the truth: you earned that guilt much more than you thought."

Sebastian shut his eyes again, but again he couldn't escape the red blossoming across his brain. He felt as if the drugs in his system were really acid, burning imprints of the memory into his gray matter. When he tried to retreat deeper into the chair, the hospital gown pulled against his back, reminding him of Ruvik's hands twisting in his shirt. _Don't believe them_. He let Ruvik's voice echo all through him. _Don't believe them._ "Where's Ruvik?"

"Ruvik is no good to you now. But if you're tired of reminiscing, we might as well begin." Adam scooted closer, his chair screeching on the tile. "I'm going to ask you a series of questions."

"Go fuck yourself," Sebastian snarled. "Where's Ruvik?"

Adam continued as if he hadn't heard. "You're going to answer yes or no. There are no other responses you can give. Do you understand?"

"Go to hell! _Where's Ruvik?"_

The chair electrocuted him again. It was worse the second time, longer, and a cry of pain splintered through his teeth. He shuddered with the come down, his mind white. The hum of the machinery in the room suddenly reminded him of music, and he could have sworn he heard a child's laughter folded deep within it. He could feel the warmth of a tiny body against his sternum.

"Stop…." Sebastian fought for each breath. "Get away from me…."

"You're going to answer yes or no," Adam repeated. "Or I'll hurt you. Do you understand?"

"I understand," Sebastian panted, "that you can go straight to—"

He knew it was coming, but that didn't make it any easier. The jolt rattled him down to his bones, and his mind blanked so effectively he thought he'd passed out. As he came to, he realized he was heaving again, though without anything left in his stomach to puke up. Tatiana wiped his face again anyway.

"Castellanos," said Adam. "You're going to—"

"Okay." Sebastian kept his eyes closed; it made his nausea worse, but at least he wouldn't have to see Adam's smug face. "Okay, just ask already."

Adam scooted closer again, close enough that their knees bumped. His voice was low and firm, and impossibly steady. "Have you ever felt betrayed by ones you trusted?" he asked.

Sebastian felt the answer well up inside him, burning behind the taste of bile at the back of his throat. He thought of the clap of Myra's shoes as she left the room, not unlike the last time he'd seen her, leaving their apartment as he struggled to prepare for a morning of work. Before he could think to hold back, he answered, "Yes."

"Have you ever betrayed someone who trusted you?"

Again, the answer came far too quickly; there were too many instances to count. "Yes," he said, and then grimaced, as if he could draw the admission back. It was the truth but he was tempted to bite his tongue off if it would keep Adam from hearing what he wanted.

"Have you committed sins that you are ashamed of?"

 _Don't answer that. You know what he's doing._ Sebastian bit his lip, but he could sense Tatiana close beside him, her slight movements indicating she might have been reaching for something. "Yes," he admitted, and several of them came to mind, in frightening detail. "Yes."

Adam lowered his voice, until it almost seemed to blend in with room's ambient rumbling. "Do you consider Lily's death to be one of them?"

 _Don't believe him._ Sebastian gripped the arm rests and again tried to fill himself with memories of Ruvik's voice close behind his ear, but instead there was only Myra leaning into his chest, her arms around his neck. The heat of her body washed over him like distant fire and fueled a crushing sensation of guilt. The answer was yes. Still, he fought back just for the sake of it, and he managed to croak, "No."

It was a lie, and he expected to be punished for it. He waited with breath held for the chair to deliver another mind-numbing shock, but nothing happened. The lack of reprimand was inexplicably disturbing, and Sebastian trembled with shame he couldn't reason himself out of.

"Did you become a cop because you thought you could help people that way?" Adam continued.

It wasn't the answer Sebastian would have given under normal circumstances, but it wasn't untrue, either. "Yes," he said.

"Do you feel that you have failed in your duty?"

Sebastian opened his eyes. He was surprised to find that there was no trace of smug superiority in Adam's face after all: just unrelenting seriousness. For some damn reason it compelled him to be honest. "I don't know," he admitted.

The chair fired, zapping him more fiercely and for even longer than before. Sebastian yelped and could have sworn the inside of his skull was blackening. His fingers ached around the armrests and the straps bit into his skin wherever he was bound. As the seconds ticked by he momentarily forgot where he was; there were just white and red fireworks exploding in his eye sockets, and a collection of bitter and shameful histories rising and falling within each blast. It was cruel, how many regrets his life had to taunt him with. By the time he pulled himself together, he was shaking and he would have said anything to let it be over.

"Yes or no," Adam reminded him icily.

"Yes," Sebastian said hurriedly, even though he couldn't remember what he'd been asked. "Yes."

Adam nodded, pleased. "Do you also feel that you failed your wife as a husband?"

"Yes…fuck." It was too hard to keep on processing meaningful thought, and his heart was racing with panic. His gaze clawed the room in search of Myra but he couldn't make out anyone past the devil and his assistant beside him. "Where is she…?" When Adam gave a look to Tatiana, he scrambled to take it back. "Yes, yes."

Adam waited a moment to make sure he wouldn't break the rules again, and then he asked, "Do you sometimes feel that your failed your daughter as a father?"

Sebastian writhed in the chair with a groan of pain. His eyes ached and it took all the frail composure he had left not to sob. "God, yes…."

"Do you blame yourself for Lily's death?"

 _Yes_. Sebastian took in a deep breath and held it as the weight shifted atop his ribs. His toes tingled as if they were curled over a ledge, the chair pushing him from behind. He couldn't lie again—he _did_ blame himself. Whether Myra was telling the truth or not, or if she was truthful whether she had acted willingly or under the influence of madmen, it didn't matter—he hadn't seen it. He'd been blind and selfish and doomed them all, and he hated himself so much that he finally understood Joseph putting the gun to his head. It should have been easy to surrender that much truth.

But when he looked at Adam and the rest of the lab melted away, a different kind of bile chewed its way up his tongue. Even shaken and red-eyed, he glared back at the administrator with defiance. "No," he said. "No, I blame _you_. And I'm going to kill you for it."

Adam leaned back, for the first time his expression registering irritation. He considered Sebastian for a long moment and then looked to Tatiana. "Fry him," he said. "And then give him a stronger dose. We're starting over."


	15. Chapter 15

"Hey," said Juli once she had grown sick of pacing. "Do you remember the first case Sebastian let me take the lead on?"

In the two hours they had been waiting, Joseph hadn't moved once from the chair at Sebastian's bedside, but he still looked just as restless as she felt. "Yeah," he said, carefully, as if he thought she were trying to trick him. "The Milton murder, right?"

"Yeah." She took a seat on the edge of the bed close to him. "That case was so screwed up. I thought 'chainsaw massacre' only happened in the movies, you know?"

Joseph winced, and suddenly she had no idea what she hoped to accomplish. There wasn't anything she could say that would have made either of them feel better, let alone break a mind control spell. But the longer Sebastian remained missing, the more desperate she was to do _something_. She couldn't stand the thought of having them both against her among the wolves.

"It was a rough one," Joseph agreed. "Honestly, I didn't think you were ready for it, at the time. But at least we got him." He looked a little too thoughtful, and Juli considered interrupting him before he could get whatever it was out, but she didn't make it in time. "You were part of 'this' by then, weren't you? You were never on the beat; you hadn't encountered stuff like that before."

Juli curled her fingers in the sheets as she pondered how honest she should risk being. _They used lies to fuck him up_ , she reminded herself. _You'll never wake him up with more of the same._ "Yeah," she said, forcing herself to sit up straighter. "But it's not like I was sheltered, either. Before Mobius took me in, I was pretty much living on the streets." Even after all the control she had managed to cast off, the memories still came back to her reluctantly, as if they were part of a movie she'd watched when she was younger. "I was rough, you know? I got into a lot of trouble. I'd seen a dead body before, but…not like that. Not with that much blood."

Joseph's grim expression softened with empathy. "You never get used to it," he said quietly.

Emboldened, Juli edged closer. "The stakeout was actually the worst part," she went on. "All that sitting around and waiting for something to happen. By the time we caught the bastard I was wound up like a top. And then Sebastian took us to that _terrible_ dive bar, God. I'll never forget that smell."

Joseph's nose wrinkled; apparently he wouldn't ever forget, either. "It was awful," he agreed. "I can't believe he preferred it _that much_ to Barely Brothers."

Juli managed not to cringe at the too familiar name. "My hands were still shaking from earlier. I didn't want him to notice, not after my first big break. I ordered a bunch of shots, thinking that if either of us got drunk, it wouldn't matter." She cast Joseph an apologetic smile. "You were so pissed at me."

"I was," said Joseph, but he was smiling, too. "I had to carry him home that night, you know. I was so exhausted afterward that I spent the night there."

"I remember! You came in together." Juli chuckled with the memory. "You were a wreck, but Sebastian was on fire that morning. Everyone thought _you_ were the one hungover; even Phi gave you hell for it."

" _Phi_ ," Joseph muttered with disdain, just like Sebastian always did, and the two of them laughed together. But their humor quickly wore out. Joseph lowered his eyes, and his expression darkened again as he stared down at his gloves. "I was really worried about him," he said. "Myra had been gone for a while by then, and it was finally starting to sink in that she wasn't coming back." He sighed. "He didn't want you seeing him shake, either."

Juli's shoulders sagged, and yet she couldn't help a spark of hope; Joseph looked so much like his old self in that moment, she couldn't believe that anyone was in control of him. "I'm sorry," she said. "I didn't know."

"It's not your fault," Joseph said quickly. "He went to some lengths to keep that part from you. And everyone else was afraid to bring it up, as if…." He shook his head. "Like they thought that if you even said Myra's name, he'd show up like the Boogeyman and make a scene. You'd think they were afraid of him. Stupid, really…."

Juli had seen Sebastian's temper more than once; part of her couldn't blame the others for staying away. Not that telling Joseph that would help matters any. "I didn't understand what was really going on at the time," she said, "but I could tell how much you were looking out for him. How much you still are. He's lucky to have you."

"Yeah…." Joseph frowned, rubbing his thumb against the palm of his left hand. "Maybe."

She watched him, prickling with hope all over again. _He can feel it_. She licked her lips. "I know how highly you think of Gutierrez's treatment," she said carefully. "But Sebastian's kind of a different beast than what she's used to, don't you think?" He made a face at her, but she continued before he could interrupt. "I mean, she doesn't know him like we do. If anyone here is looking out for _him_ , it's us. We have to protect him."

Joseph's frown deepened. "You don't think Myra is looking out for him?"

Juli cautioned herself not to answer right away, even as her memory of Myra's hand gripping hers gave her goose bumps. "Honestly, I'm not sure she's capable right now. It seems like she has a lot of issues of her own to work out."

"She cares about him," said Joseph. "More than we...."

He trailed off, and his face screwed up with confusion for a moment as he continued to stare down into his hands. Juli watched him, and when it didn't look as if he were going to finish his thought, she nudged his foot with hers. "Joseph?"

The door opened, and Juli hurried to her feet, Joseph only a beat behind. Two guards entered first and headed for the far side of the bed, then entered Tatiana, and finally, Anvi with the wheelchair and the last guard behind. Juli took one look at their captive and her heart sank.

Sebastian was strapped into the chair just like before, but it didn't seem necessary; he was entirely limp, slumped and half folded in on himself like a crumpled doll. There were fresh bruises on his jaw, blood on his lips, and his breath hissed in and out in fits and starts, as if he had to keep reminding himself to go through with the act. Juli stepped out of the way as Anvi stopped the chair, but Joseph remained, helping to unbuckle the cuffs. The look of concern he fixed his partner with was downright heartbreaking, even more so when Sebastian allowed them to transfer him back into bed without a fight.

Tatiana folded her arms as she watched them work. Her manner was tight and irritable, more so than Juli was used to seeing in her. "Agent Oda," she said crisply. "A moment, please." Without waiting to hear a response, she left the room.

With one more pained look at Sebastian, Joseph followed her out, Anvi and the wheelchair close behind. As the guards strapped Sebastian to the bedrails once more, Juli joined them, taking one of his ankles. She glanced to the guard beside her and was surprised to see his face tight with strain.

"Hey." She waited until he'd finished tightening his strap and then touched his arm. "Everything okay?"

"I hate having to watch," the man said, and without a second glance he left the room.

The two remaining guards watched him, glanced to each other, and then to Juli. It wasn't hard to interpret their uneasy expressions. "Go on," she told them. "I'll keep an eye on him." With gratitude in their faces, they joined their fellow in the hall.

As soon as the door clicked shut behind them, Juli shoved the chair closer to Sebastian's head and sat down. She didn't know how much time she'd have. "Sebastian?" Up close he looked even worse than when he'd come in: His eyes were partially open but devoid of focus, the left one still red with burst capillaries. He stank of sweat and vomit and she had to try hard not to be sick herself. "Hey, it's me—it's Juli. Can you hear me?"

His gaze swiveled toward her, and though he didn't seem to see her at first, recognition gradually solidified. "Kidman," he said hoarsely. "Where's my whiskey?"

Juli let out a sigh that could have easily been a sob of relief. "Sorry, boss," she said. She glanced between his hands and then tugged the front of his hospital gown down—no bandages. They hadn't carved into him after all. "You took so damn long I drank it myself." She smoothed his hair back from his forehead and winced at the reddening marks pressed into his scalp, like the imprints of some apparatus. "I owe you a Crown Royal."

"Fuck," Sebastian muttered, and he closed his eyes, sinking deeper into the bed. "Could really...use a drink right now...."

Juli gave his hand a squeeze, realizing only then that he was shaking. His breathing was still labored as well; whatever he had done to avoid Mobius' control, she could see how badly it had cost him. "You look like hell," she said. "What'd they do to you in there?"

Sebastian coughed and shuddered, making her wish she hadn't asked. "He just...asked questions," he said. "Over and over…."

Juli shuddered, too; she suddenly remembered the low, threatening monotone of the Administrator's voice, peeling back the layers of her memories one by one. "I'm sorry," she said almost without thinking. "I wanted to stop them before they took you in, but...."

Sebastian had gone very still. She thought maybe he had passed out after all, but then he opened his eyes again, and he looked to her with trepidation. "Kidman," he said, and then he paused, working himself up to it. "How long have you been here?"

"Since they took you in," she replied. "I wanted to—"

" _Here_." Sebastian coughed again, his hand tightening around hers until it ached. "Mobius." There was a rawness in his expression she'd never seen before. "Did you...know my wife?"

Juli tensed, her heart plummeting again into her stomach. He already looked so defeated that she badly wanted to lie to him. She glanced behind her to make sure Tatiana wasn't coming and then leaned in closer. "Yes," she said quietly. "She was the one that recruited me into Mobius in the first place."

It took Sebastian a while to process her words. "When was that?"

"Last summer. June, I think." She shook her head. "It's hard to remember sometimes. It was only a few weeks before I came to KCPD."

"June," Sebastian repeated, and she cringed at how pale he suddenly looked. "She was already here? She...."

"Sebastian, I'm so sorry." Juli's pulse throbbed between her temples, and she shifted in her chair restlessly. "I didn't know anything back then. If I had, maybe—"

"Oh God, she wasn't lying, was she?" Sebastian took in a shaky breath. "It's all true." He writhed helplessly on the bed, weak and crumbling before Juli's eyes. "My fucking God...."

"Sebastian?" Juli let go of his hand and instead put her hand on his chest, rubbing gently to try to soothe him. "Hey, calm down. You've got to breathe."

It was no use; he was shaking his head and couldn't hear her. "She killed her," he choked out. "She killed her—she told Lim to kill me—it's my fault."

"It's not your fault," Juli tried again, even though she didn't know what he was talking about and had no idea how to help. "Whatever they said to you in there, you can't believe them, okay? None of this is your fault."

"She killed our daughter," Sebastian moaned, and Juli went cold with horror. "Because of me—she said—oh my God." He was falling apart, yanking at the bindings on this wrists and ankles, not with strength but with sheer panic. "How could she? I didn't...I couldn't...." His already strained lungs heaved around the words. "My God, I...."

Juli leaned over the mattress and wrapped her arms around his neck. She didn't know what else to do, even less what to say—her throat was closing in and she found it almost as hard to breathe as him. "It's not your fault," she said close to his ear. "Whatever happened, it's not your fault."

She half expected Sebastian to fight her, but as soon as he was in her arms, he surrendered. A sob tore from his throat and he buried his face against her neck. She could even feel his hand pawing at the only part of her shirt he could reach. "Shh," she soothed, holding him tight as his tears soaked into her collar. "Shh, it'll be okay."

"Christ, I'm tired," Sebastian wheezed. He tried to press himself more deeply into her embrace but the cuffs prevented him. "I'm so tired, Kid…."

"I know." Juli felt tears in her own eyes as she stroked his hair. "Me, too. You're not alone."

"I don't know if I can do this anymore…."

Juli bit her lip hard. She wasn't any good at this: comforting, reassuring. Feeling Sebastian cry against her put a tremor in her chest she was sure would move to her hands before long. But then she took a deep breath, drawing on the strength that had sustained her within Mobius' ranks for so long. He needed her, and for much more than this. It was more than anyone had ever asked or expected from a runaway like her, and she felt a pressure rise up inside her. She had to help him. Whether it was determination or desperation, she wasn't sure, but it fueled her.

"I'm going to get you out of here," she said, and her heart began to pound as if she were already on the move. "I'll get a gun from the armory and we'll blast our way out, right now. I'll throw you over my shoulder and carry you if I have to."

Sebastian gradually caught his breath. "What about Joseph?"

"I think he's starting to see it now." Juli wasn't as certain as she made herself sound, but she at least needed him to believe it. "He's doing all this for you, after all. I'm pretty sure that if we make a run for it, he'll come with us. And if not...." She grumbled with frustration. "Then we'll knock him out and I'll carry him, too. None of us can stay here another hour."

Sebastian leaned back, and Juli let him go, staying close as he settled into the mattress. Though still haggard, the life was starting to come back into his eyes. "We need Ruvik," he said.

The name still turned her stomach, and she shook her head. "I don't think that's an option now."

Sebastian stared back at her unflinchingly. "I'm not leaving him here," he insisted, and she didn't know what to make of his sudden intensity. "Do you know where they're keeping him?"

"Yeah, but...." Juli thought of organs floating in glass cases and grimaced. "They're holding him in the south wing. But getting down there won't be easy, and Sebastian...." She glanced again to the room's door to make sure they were still alone. "I honestly don't know what shape he's in. He might not even still be alive let alone in one piece. If we get to him, and he's in no position to help us, we won't get back out."

Sebastian's face screwed up as he muttered a curse, but he didn't seem to have the energy to hold onto his anxiety. "When they found us at the apartment, there was a pair of headphones on the coffee table," he said. "Do you know if they were brought back with us?"

Juli frowned as she tried to think back. "I don't know. But Gutierrez nabbed everything either of you might have touched in that apartment. They must be here somewhere."

"You need to find them." Sebastian reached for her, and when she took his hand, he squeezed it tight. "Get them to Ruvik, or if you can't, bring them to me. If we have those, we might have a chance."

"I don't get it. Why headphones?"

"They're actually a transmitter," Sebastian explained, and she got that sick feeling all over again. "Ruvik made them to increase the power and range of his psychic power bullshit. We were going to use them to take control of Mobius' STEM terminal."

"That's...." Juli gulped. She could have even sworn the room grew darker around them. "Is that really a good idea? Giving Ruvik that kind of power again?"

"Yes," Sebastian replied without hesitation. He quivered with fury. "Mobius deserves whatever kind of hell he makes for them."

The steel in his voice gave Juli a chill, but she nodded. "Then I'll try to find them," she promised. "I'll go right now. Think you'll be all right for a while?"

"No." His lips quirked in a bitter, jagged smirk. "But it's not like we have a choice."

"Sebastian…." Juli gave his hand one last, firm squeeze and then stood up. "Just try to get your strength back," she said. "As much as you can, because when I get back it'll be time for us to run."

"I'll be ready," Sebastian assured, but before she could let him go, he gave her a tug. "Thank you, Juli."

Juli's heart gave a thump. She wanted to say something dramatic or meaningful, how she was trying to pay him back for having lied to him so long, what it meant to her to be depended on like this, but she couldn't get the words out. "We'll share a drink when this is over," she said instead, and she offered him a smile before striding from the room.

Out in the hall, her heart began to pound again. She was already thinking ahead to their potentially deadly escape and her mind raced with the maps and routes she'd memorized over the past two weeks. Before she could get far, however, she spotted Joseph. He was standing at the one-way mirror looking into Sebastian's room, and she realized, _He saw all that._ She moved closer, not sure what to make of the distant look on his face as he watched his partner through the glass.

"Joseph?" She touched his shoulder. "What did Gutierrez say?"

Joseph didn't reply right away, making each quiet second painful suspense. "She said that Ruvik's control over him is stronger than they thought," he said flatly. "They might have to resort to drastic measures to bring him back, if he can be saved at all."

Juli shifted back and forth. "How 'drastic' are we talking here?"

"She didn't say."

He was silent for another long moment, and when Juli couldn't take it anymore, she leaned in closer. "I'm getting him out of here," she whispered. There was a pretty good chance he would immediately rat her out, but she couldn't help herself; despite her strong words to Sebastian, she knew better than to think she could carry them both out of Mobius on her own, or even with Ruvik's help. "I'm going to grab some things, and when I come back, we're all leaving here, together."

Joseph frowned deeply but didn't look at her. "I don't think the Administrator will allow that."

"Fuck the Administrator—he doesn't control me anymore." She took Joseph's arm, and he flinched. "Or you. Please, Joseph, tell me you'll come with us when it's time. Just the three of us walking right out the door."

Joseph squirmed, and she wasn't surprised when he touched his free hand to his chest, rubbing the bandages beneath his suit. "I've known Sebastian for almost eight years," he said distractedly. "But I've only seen him like this once before. After Lily died."

Juli licked her lips as she tried to come up with a response. "Yeah, he's…having a hard time right now. But being here isn't helping him. _We_ have to help him."

"I know." Joseph stared hard at his partner. "I won't be able to live with myself if…."

He blinked, and then straightened up, a strange look falling over his features. "…If anything happens to him," he finished vaguely. He pushed into his chest and winced as a shudder went through him. He looked to Juli. "There's something wrong with me, isn't there?"

"Oh, thank God." Juli grabbed him up in a swift, firm hug; she could have cried all over again. "It's not you," she said quickly. "It's this place—it's these fucking assholes. It's not your fault." She leaned back again, instead gripping his shoulders. "When you brought Sebastian and Ruvik in, do you remember seeing a pair of headphones?"

"Headphones?" Joseph was disturbed and bewildered, but he looked like he was finally pulling himself together. "Yes—Ruvik was wearing them at the station. They should be with the rest of their things in Lab 2."

"Lab 2," Juli repeated, reminding herself of where that was: something of a trek from where they were, but she'd be able to pass the armory on her way there easily enough. "Okay, listen: stay here. Keep an eye on Sebastian—do _not_ leave him alone, especially with Lim. I'll be back as soon as I can."

"Wait," said Joseph. "I don't understand—what is really going on here?"

"Don't worry about that right now. In fact, don't even think about it at all." Juli gave his shoulders a clap and then let go. _There's no telling if the conditioning will kick in fully if he fights it too much. Don't push it._ "Just wait here for me and I'll explain everything later." Without waiting to hear any more protests, she turned and headed for the elevator, determined to keep her word.

***

Joseph watched her go, and once she turned the corner, he went back into Sebastian's room.

He felt sick, all over. His heart was beating to twice its normal size as far as he could tell, and his skin prickled with a sensation of stinging rain. Looking at Sebastian made it worse. He remembered one night, three weeks after Lily's death, leaving the station to find Sebastian crumpled over the steering wheel in his car. His partner, who had stood mournfully silent and composed throughout Lily's funeral, utterly shattered by grief in the middle of a downtown parking lot. Joseph couldn't remember what he'd said, if anything, but he'd felt as helpless then as he did now.

He found the Styrofoam cup he had fetched earlier, filled it at the sink, capped it. He fit a straw in the slot and approached Sebastian's bedside. "Sebastian."

Sebastian looked up at him, so exhausted and yet so wary that Joseph hated being there at all. But then he nodded, and he let Joseph slide a hand behind his neck to help him sit up. He drank, pausing once to cough, and then leaned back.

"Thanks," he muttered.

Joseph grimaced as he watched Sebastian collapse into the bed. He told himself he should have been used to this, but as wrecked as Sebastian appeared, there was still clarity in his bloodshot eyes. His pain was all too visible his throat and lungs, too affecting to be the manipulations of a psychotic who probably didn't even know what agony really was.

_Was he right all along?_ Joseph shivered with cold as he sank into the chair at Sebastian's bedside. _About Mobius—about Ruvik?_ The cup crinkled in his hands. _This is my fault?_ "Seb, I—"

"Don't," Sebastian interrupted quickly. "I can't do it again now." He squeezed his eyes shut. "Don't say anything."

Joseph lowered his head. _No. This isn't him._ Guilt burrowed through his chest like hot lead while his brain tied itself in knots. _There's nothing wrong with me—Ruvik is toying with them both._ He clenched his fists, clenched his jaws, trying to expel the sensation of chilling rain on his exposed skin. _But what if Kidman's right? She can't be. She's not. But what if she is?_

Sebastian's cuff rattled, and Joseph immediately looked up, dreading another struggle and the decision that would have to come with it. He realized soon enough that Sebastian was just trying to get his attention; his expression was still strained but his hand was open and reaching.

"Don't go anywhere, okay?" he said.

Joseph took his hand, and the strength of Sebastian's grip silenced the tangle of thoughts and instincts boiling beneath his surface. "I won't," he promised, and for the moment, that was all that mattered. "I'm staying right here."

***

Myra was still in the prep room, rubbing her thumb back and forth across the scar in her palm, when Lim entered. He headed straight over and sat down on the bench next to her, close enough that their shoulders touched, stretching his long legs out in front of him. When he slouched it put them at an even level, and she knew immediately what he'd done and what he was about to say.

"I'm sorry," he said.

"No," said Myra, and she meant to continue. She was supposed to tell him "it's better this way," or "Tatiana was right," or even "I needed to face him." But she couldn't. Her innards were made of molten lead, and she knew that if she opened her mouth again, it would spew out of her. So she just sat there, gradually leaning more into Lim's shoulder and hating him for it.

She couldn't stop thinking of that horrible look on Sebastian's face, as twisted and broken as the night of the fire. She felt his eyes charring the flesh from her body. By the time Adam and Tatiana finally emerged, she was certain nothing remained of her but ash.

Adam eyed the pair of them, but despite his obvious displeasure Lim didn't move away or even correct his posture, so instead he focused on Myra. "So here you are," he said. "You were supposed to stay for the entire procedure."

Myra wasn't sure she would be able to work up an answer for him, either, but then her mouth started moving. "I wasn't going to be any help to you," she replied calmly. "I told you a long time ago that you wouldn't be able to control him."

"That's not relevant," Adam insisted. "I told you to be there. And _you_ told _me_ you could handle yourself in his presence."

"I did." She may have been seconds away from scattering to the wind but she still managed to show him defiance. "But apparently none of us are as capable of handling Sebastian Castellanos as we thought."

Lim squirmed against her shoulder; Adam was eager enough for the distraction that he shot him a heavy glare. "You're not supposed to be here, either," he snapped. "Don't you have other assignments?"

"I'm sorry, sir," replied Lim, but he didn't move from Myra's side. Adam gathered himself up for a more serious reprimand, but they were spared by Tatiana stepping forward.

"It doesn't matter," she said, tapping a few times on the tablet she was carrying. "In fact, it's probably best that we didn't succeed in breaking him. I was monitoring his brainwaves throughout the conditioning." She handed the tablet off to Myra, who accepted out of instinct rather than interest. "Comparing them to the data we have on the Ruvik, it seems that it was during Castellnos' most susceptible moments that he was _least_ compatible. Making him compliant might have ruined any chance of placing him within the STEM core."

Myra watched the lines form jagged mountains and valleys across the screen, and she found herself placing each spike to a question, each fall to Sebastian's pained voice. "Jimenez said once that compatibility with the Ruvik core was likely dependent on the subject's memory," she murmured. "Similar life experiences. Any act of repression would logically damage that connection." She passed the tablet over to Lim before anyone would be able to see her hands shake. "But the readings from the very beginning of the session look promising."

"He's our closest match yet," Tatiana confirmed, though she didn't sound pleased. "I've already sent word to the lab to begin prepping the machine."

Myra went very still. Lim could tell immediately, and he began prodding at the tablet. "So soon?" he asked to cover her lapse. "You're not gonna give him a breather at all?"

"We can't afford to waste any more time," said Adam. "The STEM project has taken up our full time and resources for long enough, and has recently become too public. If we can't produce results with the samples we have, we have no choice but to move on."

_Samples_. Myra forced herself to straighten up; though both were clearly irritated, she couldn't afford to show them too much of her mental state. "You must be concerned about Washington after all."

Tatiana made a face, but Adam spoke over her. "This is coming down from the elders," he said, and suddenly his tension made complete sense. "They've lost their patience. We need find out as soon as possible if Castellanos is viable, or this entire enterprise will have been wasted. He'll be prepped and inserted into the STEM as soon as possible."

"I thought you were going to use Oda," said Lim, again doing his best to speak up while Myra wasn't able. "Though I guess you just said that the conditioning would have ruined that."

Tatiana folded her arms. "Yes, we did," she said tersely. "And considering the lengths we went to during his conditioning in the first place, we don't have time to unravel it now without causing some kind of damage. Which means that even if we're able to successfully integrate Castellanos into the STEM, we have only one known compatible option to pair him with."

"No," Lim said immediately, figuring it out long before Myra did. "You're not serious."

"If Castellanos survives the first linking, we'll at least know he's viable," said Adam, and Myra stared down at her hands, imaging her skin flaking away like trails of dust. "But we still don't have a reliable way of seeing into the STEM's matrix. A compatible subject is our only way of knowing if he's actually taken over the core. After that, we can begin working out how to reverse engineer compatibility."

_Inside the STEM with Sebastian_ , Myra thought, rubbing her thumb against the scar in her palm. _Sebastian, STEM's core. Leading Mobius into a new world._ She tried to picture blood welling at the old incision, but it had been too long, and she didn't think she had any drops left anyway. _Then he'll see everything. He'll know everything._

"I'm not in favor of this," Tatiana said, though to Myra's ear they were empty words. She had only ever managed to play at being human, and even then just barely. Of course she was willing to sacrifice any piece on her board for the sake of her grand experiment. "But I don't see that we have a choice, not if we want any hope of results sometime soon."

"That's too much of a risk to Agent Hanson," Lim insisted, finally straightening up. "There has to be someone else. What about Kidman? She—"

"It's fine," Myra interjected before Lim could reveal the sorry state of Juli's conditioning. She wasn't sure why she was bothering, but it felt worth it. "I'll do it." She glanced between Adam and Tatiana. "God knows neither of you will."

"Myra," Tatiana said pointedly. "You know this isn't about what any of us _wants_. It's about what's feasible."

She looked like she meant it, and she probably did. But the look that struck briefly across Adam's face was nothing short of fear. No force of nature would return him to that machine.

"I know," said Myra. She stood up, and Lim followed suit, staying close beside her. "Go prep the machine. Agent Lim and I will collect Castellanos."

"This is only the first test," said Adam. "If he doesn't survive the initial procedure this will have only been speculation. Even so…." He eyed her as she straightened her jacket. "You need to take this time to regain your composure, Myra. The STEM isn't like anything you've been exposed to before, and if you can't hold your own against that man already—"

"You don't have to worry about me," Myra interrupted confidently. "I have nothing left to hide from him."

"She'll be fine," Tatiana agreed. She glanced between Adam and Lim. "Would you two mind giving us a moment?"

Lim frowned severely, but he nodded and left the room. Adam didn't look inclined to leave the two women, but with their unrelenting stares on him, he didn't have much other choice. "I'll be with the machine," he said. "Hurry up." He showed himself out.

As soon as they were alone, Tatiana set her tablet down so she could take Myra's hands. "Myra," she said, though her tone was far too calculated for honest sentiment. "I know how this must seem. But you're not expendable to me. I need you to know that."

"I understand," Myra replied automatically. "It's not personal." She managed a faint smirk. "And who knows? He may not survive this time at all, and then I'll have nothing to worry about."

Tatiana's eyes narrowed, and her grip on Myra's hands grew tighter. "Did you ask Lim to kill him for you?" she asked.

Myra was prepared for that one. She had spent all night rehearsing for it. "Of course not," she replied with perfect ease. "It was making him promise _not_ to kill Castellanos that got him in trouble the first time." She relaxed her hands. "Why? Did he try something?"

Tatiana frowned, but whatever words were on the tip of her tongue, she didn't voice them. Instead she let Myra go and took a step back. "Not that I can prove. But I'm going to send Anvi with you to collect Castellanos, just in case." Whatever affection she might have been trying to fake fell away entirely. "I need this to work, Myra. You know what it means to me."

"I do," Myra assured. "Believe me, I do."

She stepped past Tatiana and headed for the door, and though she half expected to be halted, she made it into the hall without another word. Adam and Lim were waiting a few yards away, speaking in hushed, heated tones. As Tatiana joined Adam and the two of them headed toward the elevators, Myra fell into step beside Lim.

"I don't like this," he said immediately as they headed for the nearest security station. "It feels like he's ready to throw you away."

Myra stared straight ahead. "He doesn't have any power over me. If I do connect to the STEM, it will be my choice, and anything that happens in there will have nothing to do with him."

"You were passed over during the first round of tests for a good reason." Lim was watching her, she could feel it, but she didn't divert her focus. "I don't want to see anything happen to you."

"It's not up to you," said Myra, and she pulled out her phone, sending a text to Anvi to meet them at Sebastian's room with preparations. "You've done enough."

"If you tell me it'll be all right, I'll believe you."

That time Myra did look, and she found that Lim was offering her his left hand. She started to take it without even thinking, but then she hesitated. A realization came over her that would have rattled her bones if she hadn't already been made entirely of flaking coals. _This is what I've wanted_. She stopped walking, and as she looked into Lim's face, she perfectly understood what she had been waiting for all those months. _I won't survive this._

She took Lim's hand and gave it a brief, hard squeeze. Only after she'd let him go and started walking again did she speak. "It's not going to be all right," she said. After all the times she had used and deceived him, she wanted to be honest with him at least once. "But it's not your fault. Promise me that you'll behave after this? You'll do whatever the Administrator tells you to?"

Lim considered for a long moment. "Okay," he said at last. "I promise."

"Thank you." Ironic, that he was finally able to lie to her once she was being honest. But Myra didn't mind. She was already far away.

***

The armory didn't give Juli any trouble about checking out the .45 cal; Agent Yale was on duty and he recognized her from the field. She would have liked to take another pair for her comrades, but the suspicion that would draw was too great when she still had so far to go. Still, she felt better with the gun on her hip, even if she hoped to delay using it as long as possible.

Lab 2 was located on the building's upper floors, far removed from the more sensitive areas of research and development. She had heard once that it was to isolate any possible mishaps that might occur when using devices of unknown origin. With her clearance upgraded thanks to her supervisor, Lim, she was allowed through the first round of security no questions asked. A guard even directed her to the exact room Ruvik's things were being kept. To her dismay, a tech was inside at one of the tables, hunched over a laptop. There would be cameras as well. Juli forced herself to slow down and take a few deep breaths before stepping inside.

The tech looked up. She was younger than Juli, a pair of glasses perched low on her nose, hair tied back. She looked like she should have been in a college lecture hall somewhere, not a cult laboratory. Juli gathered herself up in an attempt to look authoritative and intimidating as she swiftly approached the table.

"Agent Kidman," she introduced herself crisply. "I was told this is where you're keeping evidence gathered from the apartment scene?"

Already she probably sounded too much like a cop instead of an agent, but the tech didn't look suspicious. She nodded vigorously and gestured to the various articles spread about her workspace. "Yes, sir—ma'am. Everything has been catalogued, and some of it just got back from fingerprinting. The land lady's prints were on a glass of water but Agent Oda cleared her. Nothing of particular note among the clothes, cigarettes…."

Juli scanned the objects, her attention snapping to a closed silver case near the opposite end of the table. _That has to be it._ She glanced back to the tech, and seeing how nervous she looked, she switched tactics. "Sure this isn't one of yours?" she asked, tapping her fingernail against a half-drained bottle of tequila.

The tech blushed and quickly shook her head. "I kind of wish," she replied, though she caught herself and looked sheepish a moment later. "It's this laptop I'm working on now," she carried on. "It's really fascinating, really—I mean—Ruvik wrote all his own software, including the operating system. He must literally be a genius, if it's true he never touched a computer growing up. I'm still trying to work out what he was up to with this last opened program, but I think it's related to the headphones."

Juli's heart skipped. She moved down the table and found that the top of the case she'd spotted was made of glass, letting her see inside; sure enough, Ruvik's headphones were nestled inside. She drew her fingers over the touch-panel lock set into the surface, but it required a pass code. "He was wearing these when we pursued him through the downtown," she said, stalling. "We were lucking to retrieve them intact."

"Actually...we're not sure yet that they are?" the tech said hesitantly. "They don't seem to do anything, now. Which is why I'm trying to unravel this software...."

A plan solidified in Juli's mind, and she swiftly turned on the girl. "You didn't turn them on, did you?"

The tech flinched. "Well, yeah. But only for—"

"They're not just headphones, they're a STEM transmitter," Juli interrupted, dragging the case down the table toward her. "They could be broadcasting a signal now. Did you remember to turn them off?"

"I—I think so." The tech looked white in the face as she stood. "I'm pretty sure—I know I did."

"Open it." Juli turned the lock toward her, and when she was met with hesitation, she hardened her face and voice once more. "You don't want to know what I saw in Beacon when a careless mistake caused the STEM to go haywire. We have to make sure they're not receiving power."

"Okay—of course." The tech still looked concerned, though it was hard to tell if she was taking Juli's warning seriously or if she was catching on. Still, she keyed in the code, but then she had to swipe her ID card as well. Even if she could get the case out of the lab, knowing the numbers might not be enough to open it outside. At least it was a hook latch and not magnetic.

The case popped open. In a desperate move Juli yanked the case toward her, pretending that her urgency over the device was just that great. The corner knocked into the bottle of tequila, sending it rocking toward Ruvik's open laptop. Juli had been hoping for it to break, but the tech chasing it down to prevent a spill was distraction enough. Thinking fast, Juli snatched a pair of cigarettes from the half empty pack and shoved them into locking mechanism. She kept one hand over it as the other pretended to investigate the headphones.

"Sorry," Juli said. "It didn't spill, did it?"

"It's fine." The tech moved the bottle to the far end of the table. "What about the headphones—transmitter?"

"I'm disconnecting the power source for now." Juli gave it a rattle while the tech's back was turned and then closed the case up. She listened for the latch to snap, and was only granted a momentary relief when it didn't; the display flashed up an error message. "And I'm taking it to Gutierrez in Lab 1," she added, grabbing it up off the table. "Anything STEM related is dangerous and needs to be under tighter security than this. She might want to relocate the laptop as well."

"Oh." The tech fidgeted uncertainly as she retook her seat. Thankfully, she seemed as confused as she did suspicious. "Guess I'll try to figure out as much as I can before it's classified too high for me."

Juli tried to offer her a reassuring smile and had no idea how well she succeeded. "Good luck," she said, trying to cover the front of the case while still looking decently composed as she hurried out. The guard outside gave her a strange look, and he glanced into the lab, but apparently the tech didn't appear harried enough to raise his suspicions, either. She was out.

_I made it._ Juli clutched her prize close and ducked into the nearest restroom. _Who knows how that will look on camera, but even if someone watching monitors noticed, it'll take them a while to figure out I wasn't sent there._ Once safe in a stall, she opened the case on a toilet and looked over the headphones again.

They looked deceptively normal, even with the cord and extra box hanging off one ear. Anyone could have mistaken the device for a jerry-rigged mp3 player instead of a mind control device. Juli got a chill as she lifted it out of the case. _A portable STEM,_ she thought. _With this, Ruvik could kill everyone here. Can Sebastian really use something like this? Would he?_ The hard, almost mad look in his eyes earlier made a damn strong case that he could, and she had the impulse to smash the thing against the stall wall. But after a deep breath she had calmed, and she slipped the device over her ears.

_I'm just out for my morning run_ , she told herself as she tucked the controller into her back pocket. _Like I do all the time. No one will look twice._ She stashed the case in the bottom of a trash can on her way out and then took off at an easy jog back toward the infirmary unit. She didn't go far before passing a group of agents, but just as she expected, they only offered her faint, familiar smiles. She nodded acknowledgement in return. _I have to get back to Sebastian. Then we can finally get the fuck out of here._

***

The door opened, and Sebastian's heart gave a thud. He had tried to take Juli's advice but there was no settling his mind or his nerves. He was worried about Joseph, about Ruvik, about their escape, if his body would be able to carry him and if it would even be willing. He didn't know how he would react if anyone—if _anyone_ —had to be left behind.

But it wasn't Juli who entered, ready to spring them into action. It was Myra. She looked just as empty as she had in the lab, and it chilled Sebastian head to toe. Then Anvi came in after her, guiding the wheelchair, and he moaned at the sight of it.

"No, enough," he mumbled, clinging to Joseph's hand. "I'm not ready for another round...."

Joseph stood, turning so he could keep his grip on Sebastian but still face the approaching women. "Myra? What's going on?"

"I need to talk to Sebastian alone for a minute," said Myra. She sounded so unlike herself in her emptiness that Sebastian would have preferred cold-hearted sneers. "Could you please wait outside?"

Alone. Sebastian's hair stood on end, watching her like a hawk as she approached the bed. He scanned every familiar line in her face for some indication that this was finally the moment they had both waited for: no audience, no administrator, where she could let her façade drop and tell him the truth instead of those unfathomable lies. It had all been part of a long game—she could still take it back. The thought left him halfway manic.

"I think he could—" Joseph started to protest, but Sebastian gave his hand a sharp yank.

"It's okay." Sebastian apologized for his roughness with a swipe of his thumb and then let Joseph go. "Thanks, Joseph. But we need to talk."

Joseph frowned uncertainly, but when Myra's gaze slid to him, something in his face changed, and he gulped. He took a step to his left as if to avoid letting her get too close. "Okay," he said. "I'll be right outside." Reluctantly, he left.

Anvi didn't follow. When Myra cast her an expectant look, she offered a sympathetic wince and shook her head. "I'm sorry, Agent Hanson," she said. "Dr. Gutierrez's orders."

"I suppose it doesn't matter now anyway," said Myra, and with a deep breath she took the seat next to Sebastian's bed.

Sebastian couldn't take his eyes off her. He was suddenly reminded her of the first day they'd met at the station, and the calm indifference she had offered him through their introductions. What a tantalizing mystery she had been. Weeks he'd spent trying to get to know her, hopelessly enamored by her strength and prowess, thrilling with every morsel of approval or affection she tossed his way. It had felt like a game they played, pushing and pulling, erecting walls and carving doors out of them, up until the bullet struck her in the back.

He remembered holding her hand in the ambulance. She'd had that terrifying look on her face, like she didn't even care that she was bleeding out. Like she wouldn't have batted an eye if the world spun on without her, and she just stayed behind in the alley, diffusing into the gutters. It didn't make any sense to him.

_There's more than this_ , he'd told her later, in her hospital room. _There's more than this piece of shit city, and these fucking criminals, and bureaucracies, and dead bodies. There's you and me._ She hadn't cried when a child murderer cracked her shoulder blade with a .22, but she cried then.

And here was that look again. _Let it all go to shit_ , it said, _because I'm already gone._ Maybe it was up to him again, to say a few words of inspirational bullshit to make it better. But there was only one thing he could say.

"Myra." Sebastian stared hard into her dead eyes. "Tell me it's not true."

"I can't," Myra replied, and everything went hot and sharp, as if he were under the lab lights again. "I wasn't lying to you before. I'm sorry."

_No_. Sebastian shuddered. He didn't think he had the strength in him to still feel horror, yet sure enough his body constricted and his eyes burned. "No," he tried again. "Please, don't."

"But I didn't tell you the whole truth," she continued, and he hated himself for the way his heart skipped with the words, as if there was anything she could have said. "I couldn't, with the Administrator there; there are things I want to tell you I wouldn't want anyone else to hear, especially him. But in case I don't get my chance, I wanted to tell you…."

She leaned forward against the bedrail. Sebastian could barely breathe. Finally there was something like emotion in her glassy eyes, but he had no idea what to make of it. "I'm sorry," she said, her voice so thin he could feel it snapping in half between them. "I shouldn't have loved you. But I did—that part wasn't a lie. You don't know what you meant to me." Her lips twisted in a mockery of a smile. "But I should have turned you down, that night you asked me to marry you. I'd go back and change it if I could, because then you wouldn't be here. You'd be home and safe with someone who would never hurt you like I have."

Sebastian tried to answer, but he had no idea where to begin. His insides were a helpless knot of anger and grief, his mind a slideshow of a thousand tiny moments he couldn't trust. He didn't know if he believed her let alone if it mattered. "Myra," he croaked, but he couldn't get anything else out.

"I won't ask you to forgive me," Myra said, her face porcelain again. "I don't want you to. There's more to say but I just wanted you to know this much, at least, in case we don't survive what comes next."

"What?"

"Anvi is going to give you a shot," Myra explained, and as she went on, panic struck him very still. "It's going to paralyze you, but you'll still be able to breathe, and see, and hear." Her eyelids drooped. "And feel. It's not so different from when you're dreaming, except, you're still awake."

The room began to spin around them, and Sebastian gulped, struggling to remain coherent. He could feel fingers digging into his skin. "Are you going to cut out my brain?" he asked hoarsely.

"No," said Myra, but in such a way that he registered no relief. "But you have the right idea; the administrator has decided to put you inside the STEM, to see if you can take Ruvik's place as its core. They're pretty confident that you're compatible enough."

_Inside the STEM?_ Sebastian prickled with too many warring impulses. _Ruvik believes you're compatible enough. If you could take over that machine just like you did Ruvik's nightmare…isn't that what you came for? And if Kidman can get to Ruvik…._ "What then?" he asked. He huffed. "Your friend Adam is going to have me take over the world for him?"

"Something like that." Myra leaned back. "I'm going to be your first test," she said. "If you survive being linked in, they're going to put me in there with you."

"What? But…." Just when he thought he was getting the blocks stacked, she knocked them down again. "Then we…."

Myra nodded. "Then it'll finally be you and me. I'll be in your mind, and you in mine. You'll be able to see everything I've kept from you." Her smile returned, however fleetingly. "And of course, I'll be able to see everything in you, too."

Sebastian whirled with the prospect. Real answers, real truth—it didn't seem possible. He watched her push to her feet and was already awash with questions. Even knowing there was no explanation she could give that would make up for her sins, he simmered with an entirely wasted sensation of hope. But then the reality of what she'd said finally sank in, and he grimaced as a different set of hands seemed to paw at him. "Everything?"

"Yes. Everything."

Myra signaled for Anvi to step forward, and she did, already brandishing a loaded syringe. Sebastian tried to squirm away from it. "Wait," he said, forcing himself to look at his wife instead of the needle. Anvi's grip was unexpectedly firm as she took his biceps. "Myra, wait, I have to tell you—"

Myra took Anvi's shoulder to pause her. "Yes?"

"Myra, I…." Sebastian licked his lips as he fidgeted in his restraints. It was so foolish, but the words tumbled out of him anyway. "I thought you were dead," he babbled. "You were gone so long, and he said he—I didn't know. I wouldn't have gone through with it if I'd known you were still alive, especially not with…."

Myra stared at him in confusion, but before he could take back his nonsense, understanding came to her eyes and she looked stunned. "Is _that_ what you're really worried about right now?"

Sebastian cringed, shame piercing him from all directions. But then Myra's expression shattered, and she smiled—a pained, exasperated smile he could recognize. "Oh, Sebastian," she whispered, and suddenly she leaned down, her hands on his face and her lips on his. Her kiss was hard and sweet and everything he remembered from a thousand times before. He trembled beneath the weight of it. She pulled away before he could kiss her back, stroking his whiskers with her thumbs.

"I'm so sorry," she murmured. "But I haven't been entirely faithful to you, either."

Sebastian blinked. "What?"

Myra walked away, allowing Anvi to take her place. "Wait, what?" Sebastian said again, heat rising up through his skin. "What the hell does that—" He winced when Anvi jabbed him with the needle, filling his veins with the new drug. Unlike the last concoction, he didn't feel anything at first, and he continued to struggling against his cuffs. "Myra, stop!" he shouted as she opened the room's door. "Come back here and tell me—"

Agent Lim entered. He touched Myra's shoulder as he passed; the sight of turned the world red. "You son of a bitch," Sebastian snarled, even as his arms began to grow heavy. "You fucking…both of you, you—"

"What?" Lim challenged, coldly, without his usual good humor. He urged Anvi aside and began undoing the cuff on Sebastian's wrist. "What are you going to do to me, huh Castellanos? Tell me."

As soon as Sebastian's hand was free he reached for Lim, grabbing up a fistful of his jacket. He had all manner of detailed and gruesome fates to promise him, but all his mouth could manage was unintelligible growling. One by one his muscles grew lax, until his fingers loosened and his arm dropped to the mattress. Everything was so heavy, like layers of blankets weighing him down, his heart thudding wildly beneath the pressure. As Myra had said he could still breathe, but he didn't seem to have any control over it. He felt just as he had inside Ruvik's nightmare: oversensitive and utterly helpless.

"Well?" Lim goaded as he leaned over Sebastian, untying his other wrist while Anvi handled his ankles. "I'm waiting?"

"Ye-Jun," said Myra. "Leave him alone."

Lim made a face, but he did shut up. It only made Sebastian angrier, and he seethed, unable to move or even curse, as Lim hauled him off the bed. The run spun, granting him a glimpse of Joseph at the door before he was shoved into the wheelchair and strapped into place.

"Myra, what is going on?" Joseph demanded. "What did you do to him?"

"He's sedated," Myra replied. Sebastian hated himself for being fool enough to think there had been any real affection in her, only moments ago. "We're taking him to the STEM."

Lim finished binding him to the chair and then stepped back so Anvi could turn him around. He saw Joseph then, but he couldn't move his tongue or jaw enough to speak, and only managed breathy grumbles. He tried to convey as much as possible with eyes alone, only to realize Joseph already understood very well.

"You think putting him back in that machine is going to help him?" said Joseph, planting himself in the wheelchair's path. "It's because of that thing that he's in this state in the first place."

"We don't have any other means of reaching him," Myra said. "You have to trust me, Joseph."

Sebastian hissed, but then Anvi strapped an oxygen mask to his face, and he couldn't do even that much anymore. Joseph watched with escalating concern. "We should talk about this," he said. "Give me more time with him. It's only been a day; I'm sure if we—"

"These are our orders, Agent Oda," Myra cut him off impatiently. "Step aside."

Joseph looked unnaturally pale, and he kept clenching his left hand as if it hurt. "No," he said anyway. "Not until you—"

Lim grabbed him by the knot of his tie and pulled—pulled so hard he threw Joseph out of Sebastian's range of sight entirely. Sebastian heard him hit the wall, and he strained his ears until a sputter of breath assured him Joseph was okay. He was full of wrath and would have done anything to have Lim bloody and writhing beneath his boot again.

Myra sighed, unmoved by his violence. "Bring him with us," she said. "It'll be up to Tatiana what we do with him."

"Sure," said Lim.

Myra headed out of the room, and Anvi followed, pushing Sebastian in the wheelchair. He could hear Joseph protesting, quiet sounds of a brief scuffle, but then he was out in the hall and surrounded by his three armed buddies from earlier. They formed a procession and all together headed off down the hall to the elevator. It was larger inside than it appeared, with enough room for all of them to fit. Sebastian wasn't sure whether to be anxious or relieved when he heard Joseph being pushed inside behind him.

"Joseph," Myra said as they descended. "Have you seen Agent Kidman lately?"

"No," said Joseph, but he sounded shaky, and it made Sebastian ache to think of what Lim might have in store for him. "She checked in with Sebastian after he came back from his treatment, but I haven't seen her since. I think she went back to her room."

He wasn't much of a liar, and Myra's quiet hum made it clear she saw through him, but she didn't say more. She set her hand on Sebastian's shoulder. The pressure of her fingers was hot and unbearable.

Sebastian tried to focus on what was coming: the unbridled STEM, and whatever horrors lingered within it; the promise of Myra joining him, a possibility for truth; the swiftly diminishing hope that Juli could get to Ruvik in time to help them, if he was even capable of helping them at all. He tried, but locked inside his own flesh all he could think about was the past. Fragments of his life paraded across his eyes like clips from a movie about somebody else, even as a familiar weight settled onto his chest until he was suffocating, his ribs contorting beneath it. He couldn't bear to draw the memories closer _or_ push them away—they were in the air, in his sweat. His entire life felt like a second skin clinging to him with nothing but raw meat underneath.

"Seb," said Joseph, and Sebastian managed to look at him. He really was pale. "I'm sorry."

The elevator sounded, and Lim gave Joseph a shove, pushing him into the wall of the hallway beyond so that the rest could pass ahead of them. The clack of their shoes against the tile floors and the creak of the wheels drew Sebastian sharply back to the present. There wasn't much to see at first, just a set of double doors at the end of an empty corridor, where Tatiana was waiting. As they approached, she pressed her hand to the scanner, and the doors swung wide, granting Sebastian a full view of the chamber beyond.

The machine was smaller than the grand STEM core that Sebastian remembered from the top of Beacon's tower, but the sight of it still turned his stomach. Tubes and cables ran floor to ceiling surrounding the apparatus' center, branching out into five porcelain tubs and the work stations that monitored them. A dozen or so scientists were moving about the room from one table to the next, but they stopped their anxious fiddling and turned to stare once the procession entered. Even Adam himself was among their ranks, his attention fiercest of all. Their glares, though unsettling, were nothing compared to the malice of the STEM itself. It hummed with electricity and Sebastian could have sworn he felt its eyes on him.

"Now, Castellanos," said Adam as Myra stepped forward, taking her place beside him. "Don't disappoint me."

***

The ghastly image of the STEM froze Joseph in place. He didn't have any memory of seeing it from the outside, but even so the wires and monitors, the blinking lights and the bathtubs—they set his heart pounding. Already he felt paper thin, and the machine seemed to vibrate straight through him.

"What is he doing here?" Tatiana asked.

It wasn't until that that Joseph realized how far he'd strayed from Sebastian, and he started forward, anxious to catch up. Lim grabbing his elbow halted him. "Let go," he said automatically. "I want to—"

"His conditioning is slipping," said Lim, strangely eager. "He stood up to Myra. Should I lock him up while he rides it out?"

Tatiana looked ready and angry to scold him, but when she looked at Joseph, she changed her mind. The disappointment in her face was bizarrely distressing. "No. Take him to his room and sedate him. We'll reinforce once we're finished here."

_Sebastian was right_. Joseph shivered, sweating through his suit as he scanned the chamber for a sign of his partner. _Kidman was right. What have I done?_ His hand was throbbing, and he couldn't help but cradle it to his chest. "What did you do to me?"

Both of them ignored him. "Isn't this what we were just talking about?" Lim insisted. "We should let him crack—then he'll be compatible, won't he? So Myra won't—"

"It doesn't work that way," Tatiana cut him off tersely. "Take him back to his room and sedate him. And when you're finished, I want you in the com room. The chamber is going on lockdown. No one goes in or out—no communication until I say so. We can't risk any interruption or contamination to the experiment."

"I want to be in there for this."

Joseph squared his shoulders. "You can't just—"

Lim shoved him into the wall; he didn't seem to exert much effort, but Joseph felt the impact up and down his back, and the breath was pushed from his lungs. As he coughed and sputtered, he could hear Tatiana saying, "Stop that. You're behaving like a child."

"Why are you willing to risk Myra when we can just use this asshole?" Lim demanded. "He's not valuable to us."

"That's not for you to decide." Tatiana fixed him with an icy glare. "Take him to his room, sedate him, take over at the com room. That's an order, Agent Lim."

Lim bristled, but he took a step back. "Yes, ma'am," he muttered, and he took Joseph by the elbow again, yanking him away from the wall. "Let's go."

_That's an order._ The words thundered in Joseph's ears, and he could feel something deep in his brain trying desperately to click into place. "What did you do to me?" he asked again, and Lim looked like he might have answered, if not for Tatiana calling after them.

"Lim," she said. "Don't try to interfere with Castellanos again. Remember: everything I make, I can unmake."

Joseph felt a quiver go through the hand gripping his arm. "Yes, ma'am," Lim repeated, and then he was dragging Joseph back to the elevator. He didn't let go until they were inside and going up.

Joseph leaned his back against the elevator wall. _Sebastian was right about everything_ , he thought, and yet he couldn't stay focused, as if the colors of his brain were dribbling out through cracks in his skull. _They've messed with my head._ He closed his eyes as sweat bubbled and popped against his skin. _No, that's crazy. There's nothing—no, there's—damn it, why can't I think?_

He opened his eyes again. Once thing was for certain: he couldn't stay with Agent Lim any longer. The man was standing very still, unnaturally still, like a coiled predator. He was taller and broader and in an open fight he would easily win, even if Joseph hadn't been ready to fall apart at his seams. In his room, there was at least furniture, lamps and cutlery and…maybe something, anything, that would help even the odds.

The elevator reached its destination too soon, and Lim pulled Joseph out, around a corner to a security door guarded by a man with a gun.

"You're relieved," Lim barked at the man, who flinched. "Join up with your off day patrol for the next two hours."

"Yes, sir," the guard said immediately, and without question he left his post.

Lim took off his glove, using the hand print scanner to let them into the room. It looked like a large scale security office not unlike the one at KCPD, if only it had five times the budget. Two women were on duty, watching diligently over the different monitors. They looked up immediately when Lim entered and both betrayed a flash of wary concern.

"Agent Lim," the closest one greeted. "Can we—"

"Out," said Lim, jerking his chin toward the door. "Take lunch or something. Gutierrez put me in charge."

They glanced at Joseph. He must have looked pretty terrible, because they seemed reluctant to leave. But he imagined that none of Mobius' officers were up to the task of questioning Agent Lim in his harried state, and they, too, quickly followed his orders.

As soon as they were out of the room, Lim let his captive go and leaned over the closest workstation. As he began typing out commands, Joseph took the opportunity to put some space between them. He considered making a run for the door, but his knees were unsteady and he had no idea where to go. Anxiously he looked from one monitor to the next, finally spotting three cameras that captured the STEM chamber they'd left Sebastian and the rest in. He could see Sebastian being laid out face down on what looked like an operating table....

_There's a dozen people in there,_ Joseph thought desperately. _Isn't there anything I can do to stop this?_ A few monitors over, he caught a glimpse of Juli reaching Sebastian's room. _Kidman. If I can get to her, maybe the two of us can figure something out._

There was a fire extinguisher on the wall. He edged toward it, watching Juli on the screens to try and distract himself from his aching hand and chest. "So," he said. "I guess you're not sedating me."

"You're welcome," said Lim as he continued to work.

"You're betraying your orders," said Joseph, made ill with a sensation of guilt that didn't belong to him. He couldn't fight it out. "What are you trying to do?"

Lim kept on typing and didn't answer. When Joseph leaned to the side, he was able to read a few commands off the workstation screen; Lim was breaking all lines of communication between the STEM chamber and the rest of the building. Tatiana had mentioned a lockdown, but Joseph doubted this was what she'd had in mind. Finally Lim punched in one last command and then straightened up.

"You know," Lim said in his peculiar sing-song tone, "I wasn't born here, not like Hanson and Gutierrez. I was born overseas."

Joseph glanced to the monitors, but Juli was no longer outside Sebastian's room, and he wasn't able to locate her right away. Lim was turning around and he deserved full attention. "Oh?"

"Yeah." Lim chuckled. "I know you don't care, but you're not unconscious, so you might as well hear me out."

_What's going on?_ Joseph swallowed hard; he and Sebastian had dealt with many a strange customer over the years, but watching Lim lean back against the workstation, he had no idea what to expect. "Sure," he said carefully. "I wasn't born here, either."

Lim pointed at him. "Canada. Right?"

"Yes."

"Cool." Lim shrugged. _Unhinged_ said the little roll of his head. "Anyway, my folks, they came over from South Korea. I guess they got themselves in some trouble and they wanted to start a new life, here in the good ol' USA. As it turned out…that life didn't include me."

"That's…." Joseph swallowed. _Is he telling me this because he's going to kill me?_ He leaned back, feeling for the fire extinguisher. It probably didn't matter if Lim saw what he was up to or not. "That's rough."

"I didn't blame them," Lim prattled on. "I mean, I was four, I didn't understand. But they must have seen me coming, because I was…a _bad_ kid. Like, _really_ bad. Mobius had to pull me out of a facility." He paused, his pale eyes twinkling with some memory. "They put Myra in charge of me. She was only a few years older than me, but she was like my handler. She figured me out. It was her idea to cut me open."

Joseph felt a sharp pain in his chest, ripples across his skin, but he clenched his teeth and fought to stay composed. "What?"

Lim smirked at him as if he knew exactly what he was feeling. "You see, I always knew there was something wrong with me."

He pushed away from the desk, and Joseph tensed, reaching behind him. "I could feel it, you know?" Lim continued. "In here." He tapped two fingers to his sternum and stepped closer. "Like there was something inside me other _normal_ people didn't have. I was supposed to be _more._ For a while I had myself convinced I wasn't even human." He laughed. "Kids and their imaginations, right?"

One more step and he'd be too close for a wielded fire extinguisher to be effective. Joseph pulled it off the wall, gripping the neck in his right hand. He was ready to make a fight of it, but then Lim stopped short.

"It frightened me," said Lim, with a sudden, eerie sincerity that gave Joseph goose bumps. "But Myra, she told me, 'Let's just cut you open, and we can see for ourselves.' So we did." He slashed an X across his chest with his fingers. "And then, they cut me up some more." He tapped his eyelids, his ear, his temple. "So I could match the thing inside me. She helped make me what I was always supposed to be."

Joseph grimaced. He had known Myra for years, long enough for profound respect to sour into disappointment and even resentment, but he couldn't picture what Lim was describing. Myra, a young agent, carving into fresh recruits.... He remembered defending her to Sebastian only hours earlier and could have thrown up. "That's... I'm happy for you."

Lim's smile unwound. "The reason I'm telling you this is because I want you to _get it_ , Oda," he said. "What that woman means to me. I would do _anything_ for her." He raised an eyebrow. "And I'm willing to bet that you feel the same way about your partner."

_I won't be able to live with myself if anything happens to him._ The words drilled into Joseph's skull, and as much as he knew someone had put them there, that didn't make them less true. He tried to catch another glimpse of Sebastian on the monitor but Lim was in the way. "I do," he admitted, adjusting his grip on the fire extinguisher. He watched him closely for any indication of where the attack would come from; he could feel it approaching like a gear twisting against his back, getting ready to spring back. "But I don't see how you killing me helps either of them."

"I'm not going to kill you," Lim replied, taking off his other glove. "I just wanna cut you open."

He moved. Joseph swung his weapon, preparing to let go if Lim dodged; he couldn't afford to have momentum make him vulnerable. But Lim blocked the extinguisher against his forearm. The impact shook them both, and Lim's expression flashed with pained surprise as if he'd underestimated his opponent's strength. Joseph took advantage of the opening to kick the inside of his knee, buying enough time and space to get his back away from the wall.

He didn't get far—Lim stumbled but only for a moment, and he lashed out with a kick of his own, sweeping Joseph's feet out from under him. When he hit the floor the extinguisher flew out of his grip and he could have sworn his organs rattled. He managed to get to his knees, but by then Lim had him by the back of the neck, and he was dragged right back into the wall.

"I guess the serum's not entirely out of your system," said Lim. Joseph fought back, but they were too close together, and Lim had too many advantages. "If only we'd done this sooner, we could have had a _real_ fight."

Joseph went for a punch, but Lim caught his wrist before he could get any momentum, forcing it to the wall. Within seconds five iron fingers were around his throat and forcing his chin up.

"What serum?" he choked out as he pried at Lim's fingers. "What did they do to me?"

"Don't remember that part, huh?" Lim taunted. "Gutierrez would have given you a shot of it after your first conditioning. It's her special elixir—helps heals wounds faster. Hard to forget you've been cut into when it's still itchy, after all." He shifted his grip on Joseph's wrist. "Has the added benefit of making you stronger, for as long as it's still in your system. In my case, pretty much all the time, so don't feel too badly about losing."

Lim worked two fingers beneath Joseph's glove. His skin was hot and his nails rough, and he dug viciously into the lines of Joseph's palm. Joseph winced, trying to yank free, but that only hurt more.

"There," said Lim, kneading into the bruised flesh. "This is where they cut you."

Blood welled at the incision; Joseph could feel it crawling through the gaps in their pressed hands. The slick of it triggered in him a vibrant memory of blazing white lights, leather on his wrists and ankles, a vice around his head. His heart raced and voices blurred in his ears.

"Wha...." Joseph closed his eyes, but he could still feel Lim's breath on his face, and it nauseated him. "Tell me what they did to me!"

"They took you into that lab just like everyone else," said Lim, his voice tight and eager. "The Administrator asked you his questions. You remember, don't you? The chair?"

He gave Joseph's neck a shake, and yes, he remembered. He remembered electricity coursing through his nerves and that voice in his ear, rumbling, delving. He wanted to be sick. The words scrambled together and left only that terrible fear beneath a dozen watchful eyes, and the shame of being laid open in front of them.

"They brainwashed you, Oda," Lim carried on. "You let them do it. You led them straight to your partner and now they're killing him in that machine thanks to you. There's only one way for you to help him now."

He let go of Joseph's neck and instead grabbed for his shirt, tearing it open and sending buttons flying. The scrape of his pawing fingers lit a fire between Joseph's ribs and he knew, with a feral panic, that he had to stop it. The lowered angle of Lim's shoulder gave him an opening. With all his strength he swung his open palm into Lim's ear.

It worked better than he'd hoped; Lim reeled, giving Joseph enough maneuverability that he was able to raise his arm up and over Lim's just like in training, rolling his body, putting him right where he needed to be to elbow his attacker in the face. When he yanked his second hand free their fingers tangled in the glove, bending Lim's the wrong way until he was able to struggle out of it. He put his knee in Lim's gut and finally escaped.

_Have you ever felt betrayed by ones you trusted?_ The words pealed across Joseph's ears like thunder as he scrambled away from the wall and snatched up the fire extinguisher again. Without pausing to consider how Lim would come at him next, he heaved it at him and made a dash for the exit. _Have you ever betrayed someone who trusted you?_

He reached the door, but Lim was right behind. A fist rushed at him that he almost couldn't dodge; the security door dented beneath the hit, shuddering on its frame. In the close quarters Joseph lashed out, driving the heel of his palm into Lim's already bloodied nose. It only seemed to make him angrier. With a growl that didn't sound human Lim reared back and the forward again with a powerful kick.

The door came off its hinges. As it tipped Joseph went with it, and they spilled together into the hallway. He tried to get to his feet but Lim grabbed him by the shoulder and kneed him in the gut so hard it threw him into the opposite wall.

_Do you often feel ashamed of your own weakness?_

Joseph collapsed onto his knees and vomited. His ribs blazed from the attack, and when he wrapped his arm across his chest, he could tell at least one was fractured. He grit his teeth and forced his head up, determined to at least face whatever his enemy had in store for him.

Lim was scraping his sleeve across his face, smearing the blood from his broken nose. "If you won't cooperate, I'll just kill you," he spat. "She doesn't need you around complicating things anyway."

Joseph could feel something cold and wet prickling the back of his neck. _Do you wish you were stronger?_ Adam hissed in his ear. He pushed against the wall so he could get himself upright, letting go of his aching ribs to loosen his tie. "So try it," he said.

"My pleasure." Lim grabbed for his shirt again, ripping it further open. His fingers raked over a scar that shouldn't have been there, and Joseph grabbed for his wrist and triceps, hoping a good enough snap would damage his elbow. _Would you do anything_ , that damn voice bellowed behind his eyes, _if only you could be stronger than this?_

"Agent Lim!"

Both turned: the door guard that Lim had dismissed earlier was back, and Juli was with him. He rushed forward, confusion and concern in his face, but Juli hung back. Her face hardened with determination and she unclipped the pistol from her belt.

Lim let Joseph go and moved as if to greet the approaching man, but too quickly, his attention locked on Juli as if he already knew exactly what she was up to. Without a word she leveled her .45. The flash of her eyes across the barrel was piercingly familiar. When she pulled the trigger, the report of the gun struck all through Joseph, burrowing into his chest. He could feel the bullet ricocheting through the chambers of his heart. By the time he looked down, blood was already flowing down his chest, and when he raised his eyes again, the hallway lights flooded his senses. Tatiana was standing in front of him, a smear beneath the florescents.

"Now remember, Joseph," she told him with sympathetic but firm authority, "I'm the one that pulled this bullet out of you. But I can always put it back in."

Joseph blinked, and he was on his knees again, shoving his hands into the bleeding hole in his chest. Every breath was agony. When his skin began to tingle he thought he was going numb, but then he realized it was the rain. The floor beneath him was rough as concrete and he could hear buildings cracking and churning in the distance.

_No, not again_. Joseph rubbed his eyes and got blood on his face, but when he looked again he was still inside headquarters. The guard that had interrupted them was dead a few feet away, shot through the back of the head. Beyond him, Lim and Juli were grappling back and forth in the narrow corridor. For an instant, lightning flashed, and Lim cast shadows larger and more grotesque than himself.

Joseph crawled away from the wall, gagging as the new position sent blood flowing up his throat. He fumbled at the dead guard's gun belt and finally managed to claw his weapon free. The world tried to reverse on him again; when he flicked the safety off and raised the pistol, Lim and Juli were gone, replaced with a hellish, rain-spattered landscape of ruptured skyscrapers and roving beasts.

_It's not real_ , Joseph told himself, both hands around the gun. _Ruvik doesn't have any power over me now._ He squeezed his eyes briefly shut, and when he opened them again, the pair was back: Lim had one hand around Juli's neck as he pinned her to the wall, and she had her four inch heel sheathed in his thigh. Holding his breath to steady his aim, he squeezed the trigger.

The bullet struck Lim in the back of the head. Clumps of scalp and shattered bone went flying, and he convulsed, dropping to the ground with a sickening thud. Juli collapsed right after, coughing and holding her neck. Joseph let the gun fall so he could press his hands again to the hole in his chest. Blood was still pouring from jagged wound, blistering his cold fingers. He probably didn't have long, and he was dizzy with shame. After everything, was he really leaving Sebastian behind? The thought hastened his strength from his body.

"Jo…Joseph," Juli wheezed as she struggled to regain her breath. "Shoot him again!"

Joseph startled, and when he looked up he chilled further at the sight of Lim getting his legs beneath him. He was sputtering and gagging, blood pouring from the crater ripped out of his skull, and his icy eyes rolled blindly back and forth. When he tried to stand he stumbled roughly into the nearby wall. But he was standing, God help them. He was still alive. He touched his hand to the back of his head and let out a terrible, hair-raising moan.

"Shoot him!" Juli shouted, and Joseph lurched for the gun. " _Fucking kill him_!"

Lim pushed away from the wall and ran. Joseph's hands were slick and shaking but he leveled the pistol and fired, shot after shot. Two caught him in the left arm and elbow, but he didn't stop, leaving a bloody smear on the far wall as he turned the corner and disappeared.

" _Fuck_ ," said Juli. She coughed some more and was finally able to stand. "I knew he'd fuck everything up." She grabbed her gun and limped over to Joseph, but then she had to pause, leaning forward against her knees. "You okay?"

Joseph blinked at her. His entire torso was stained crimson, skin so pale he could have easily been dead already. With every passing second he felt hollower. "Not really," he replied hoarsely.

Juli smirked as if it was a joke and straightened up. "Where's Sebastian?" She spotted the open doorway into the com room and headed inside. "Maybe I can see him on the monitors."

Joseph slumped onto one hand, watching, dumbstruck, as she moved away. "He's...." He may have not been any use to her in his current state, but she could have at least offered some sympathy. "They took him...to the STEM."

"Shit." She leaned over one of the workstations and began typing, only to be met with error after error. "The whole chamber is locked down. It even runs on a whole other power grid we can't access from here. There's no way we're getting in, short of tearing the building apart...."

Joseph's gaze swam out of focus, and he had to close his eyes before it made him nauseous. _If only he hadn't stopped me_ , he thought, his arms aching as if they were buried beneath slabs of rubble. _If he wasn't trying to help me, he wouldn't even be here._ He clenched his teeth against a sound of pain. _I've done nothing but make things harder for him._

"Joseph?" Juli was back and kneeling in front of him, her hand on his shoulder. "There are more coming—we have to get out of here."

"Go without me," Joseph replied weakly. His hands were numb and he wasn't sure he could stand let alone run. "Help Sebastian."

"What? No." Juli looked him up and down. "Are you hurt?"

Joseph let out a huff of incredulous laughter. "You shot me," he said, though he didn't even have the strength to be angry. "Again."

" _What_?" Juli pushed his ripped shirt open, and he watched her hands become stained with the still-pumping blood, but then she kept on looking. "Where? How bad is it?"

"What are you...can't you...." The press of her searching fingers hurt, and he urged them off him, coughing. He could feel blood slicking his lips, and as he tried to wipe it away, he realized...he should have been dead already. A .45 in his heart should have shredded his ventricles and bled him out—his lungs should have been drowning. He was back in Hell, dying slowly over hours and days. At any moment boils would rise from his skin.

He looked at Juli and shuddered. "You can't see it, can you?"

"No...." Juli touched his chest again. "There's nothing here, Joseph—it's just a scar. There's no gunshot wound."

Joseph gulped; to him it felt as if she was poking him in his exposed organs. _It's not real_. He took a deep breath, but that only made the choking copper in his throat worse. _This is...Gutierrez's failsafe, to keep me compliant._ But no matter how resolutely he told himself that much, he couldn't make his brain believe it. He was still laid open—he was still bleeding out.

"I can't," he gagged. "I'm trying, but—"

"You need Ruvik," said Juli, to his shock. She pulled a pair of headphones off her neck and gave them a quick look. "I sure hope they still work." She tucked the control piece into what remained of his breast pocket. "Hold onto these—Sebastian said we would need them."

Joseph let her put them on him. "You want to...wake Ruvik?" he asked, and by then she was drawing his arm over her shoulders.

"We might not have a choice," Juli replied as she hauled him to his feet. "If we can get down to the basement, we can short out some fuses on the way to the south wing. They'll have a harder time finding us in the dark."

"But won't _we_ —"

Juli turned her gun toward the com room and fired, hitting the fire extinguisher. The case cracked open and immediately began to spray its contents everywhere, covering the desktops and monitors. "I have a lot of the building memorized," Juli said as she holstered the gun, devoting herself instead to helping Joseph take the first steps forward. "And I've had some practice in the dark."

An alarm bell shrieked overhead; it sounded a lot like a creature bellowing, to Joseph's ears. Juli swore and hurried them down the hall, but then another guard and one of the women from the com room turned the corner. They spotted the pair and the dead body behind them immediately. It wasn't until then, as the guard started to lift his rifle, that Joseph remembered he still had a pistol in his hand. Without thinking he leveled and fired—he was half dead, he'd failed his partner, he couldn't lose anything else. The first shot caught in the man's vest but the second split his throat. The com's agent wasn't prepared. She stared back at Joseph blank-faced, and he wondered briefly if she was feeling what he was, her mind splitting open with the Administrator's voice in her ears. Then he put three bullets in her chest.

Juli held still until she was sure both were dead. "Good shot," she said as she continued forward. She sounded breathless. "They must have found Lim and sounded the alarm. We have to hurry."

When they reached the bodies, Juli stopped them again to grab the second guard's gun, slinging it over her shoulder. Joseph tried to not look. "You really want to wake up Ruvik?" he asked. They reached the elevator, its closed doors smeared with blood, and instead ducked into the emergency stairway. "He'll turn this place into Hell."

"That's the idea." Juli kept one arm tight around his waist as they clambered down the stairs. Each step jarred his aching ribs and spilled more blood down his stomach. "We're getting out. If we have to kill every one of them to do it, so be it. It's what they deserve."

_It's what they deserve._ Joseph forced himself to take a deep breath and hold it a moment, as if he could refill the lung his fractured mind was telling him was collapsing. _It's what has to be done, if we're going to save Sebastian._ Nothing mattered more, and it was telling himself that which enabled to stay on his feet as Juli led them down, into the Mobius' bowels.

***

_She fucking lied to you_.

They shaved a two inch square in the back of Sebastian's head. He could feel the scrape of the razor against his scalp but he couldn't pull away. He couldn't flinch when a tech swabbed the newly exposed skin with alcohol, or when someone drew an X on him. He couldn't close his eyes when he heard the drill.

_Every word out of her mouth from the moment you met her._ He took a breath when the vice holding his head steady tightened, and a moment later the bit reached his flesh, shredding easily on its path into his skull. _She says she still loves you?_ His eyes were watering and he couldn't blink them clear. _She's a liar. She used you, and she still is._

The drill carved into bone, only just enough to breach the cavity, but enough that the vibrations saturated him. He would have lost his mind to horror if not for the anger cutting him up from the inside. _If she could go back, she would rather unmake your daughter than save her,_ he thought, raving helplessly in his useless body. _She'd kill her again. She'd take everything worthwhile in your life away from you._

They put something in him. Sebastian could feel metal chafing the inside of the tiny shaft they'd created, prepping him like a wall mount. And then the clamps were removed from his head, and they dumped him back in the wheelchair to be shuffled to the STEM proper.

_This must be how Ruvik felt_ , he thought, vibrating with hate as he was lifted out of the chair _._ He couldn't blame him for what had happened next.

They lowered him into the tub. The water was lukewarm, and as it rose up along his body, creeping up his chin and ears, it brought with it a flash of instinctual panic. Then Myra leaned over him, cupping his jaw with both hands to keep his face up as the others repositioned him. Something within the tub swelled until it was supporting his back, and when all hands but Myra's pulled away, he was floating. It was surreal and disorienting, and he found himself staring directly into Myra's face to keep himself focused.

She stared straight back, but her eyes were empty again, offering him nothing. Sebastian couldn't stop himself from wondering who else she had looked at with eyes like that, who among her Mobius cohorts—her Mobius _lovers?_ —she had given her confidence and trust. The speculations churned over and over in his rotting innards, but then he reminded himself _, Her turn is coming up._ Anvi approached, pulling his hospital gown down to tape sensors to his chest, but Sebastian only watched Myra. _She won't be able to lie to you in there. Pull her apart, just like Ruvik showed you._ He ached with anticipation. _But first, you have to survive whatever's left in this fucking machine._

Anvi stepped back, and Tatiana took her place. She, too, look alight with anticipation, though of another sort. "You will let me know," she said, "if you still see me in there, won't you, Castellanos?"

_If I do, I'm wringing your fucking neck_ , he wanted to say. He hoped the glare he fixed her with got the message across, and it seemed to, because she smirked. Then Myra tipped his head forward, and Tatiana took a fistful of his hair, holding him still as she stabbed something into the hole she'd carved in his skull.

It didn't hurt; there was only the pressure, and a wrongness that made his stomach turn. Then both women stepped back, letting his head sink into the water. It wet his whiskers and ears, but no higher.

"He's ready," said Tatiana, somewhere beyond his vision.

"Then proceed," replied Adam.

Sebastian looked again for Myra, but saw only the back of her head as she strode away. _You'll survive_ , he told himself fiercely as the machines above him began to whine. _You have to, if only to get your hands on her. Just like Ruvik showed you._

A jolt struck him in the back of the head, and everything went swiftly dark. He was alone in weightless, empty black. But then he sensed lights glinting out from the abyss, and he reached for them.


	16. Chapter 16

For the first time, Juli was grateful for her experience inside STEM.

The twists and turns of Mobius' underground were seared into her brain. She had already traversed its hallways in near perfect darkness, hunted by the screaming undead—a few security guards, disoriented by lack of leadership, couldn't come close to the Hell she'd survived. Even with with Joseph still depending on her shoulders, they moved quickly down through the building to the maintenance corridor. There were a few engineers on duty, crowded around a radio that was relaying orders from above. Juli only heard "that new agent from KCPD" before she fired several shots over their heads.

"Everyone who wants to live needs to leave," she said.

There was a split among the ranks; two of them immediately backed away, but another two stood their ground. "We're Mobius," said a woman, reaching for a wrench to brandish. "We're willing to die for—"

Juli fired, taking her out with two shots to the chest. The man beside her darted to the side, but Juli killed him, too, even though it took more bullets to do it. The remaining engineers fled, and she hesitated, but then Joseph leaned around her and fired. He hit both in the back and they crumpled.

Juli held her breath. During her time in KCPD she had rarely seen Joseph fire his gun at all let alone at a person. She glanced to him and found him just as startled by his own actions. But then he shook his head, and with Juli's help, he was able to sit down on a nearby stool.

"We can't take any chances," he said quietly.

Juli nodded, holstering her pistol in favor of the rifle she'd stolen from an earlier guard. "By the time we wake Ruvik up, they'll be glad they didn't live to see it," she assured him. But she still felt a weight in her stomach as she hunted out the building's emergency generator.

 _Some of the people here were born into this_ , she thought as she disconnected the fuel lines. _Some would have been recruited and brainwashed like I was, or straight up kidnapped like Joseph. But there's no way to tell them apart now._ She opened fire on the power cables, ducking beneath a shower of sparks. _He's right—we can't take any chances._

Once the backup generator was disabled, Juli turned on her attention to the fuse boxes. Joseph had beat her to it; though leaning heavily against the box to stay upright, his eyes were clear and sharp as he pointed out the proper levers. "I can't find anything that connects to the STEM chamber, but this looks like it controls power to the south wing," he said. "If we turn only this off, we'll have some cover getting to Ruvik, without panicking the entire building. Turn off everything and they might end up evacuating."

 _We can't let them leave_. Juli took a deep breath. "If we leave power to the upper levels they could call for help," she said. "What if there are reinforcements?"

"They won't contact anyone who isn't already Mobius. Their connection to the FBI is legitimate; they can't risk drawing any more attention to themselves after yesterday." He faced her, clearly as eager to convince himself as her. "Anyone who comes will deserve to be here."

They met each other's gaze for another long moment, steeling their conviction. Then Juli nodded, and she threw the switch. For a moment there was no reaction, but then the connections to the generator she had disabled began to hiss and crackle, seeking a function they couldn't fulfill. Juli used the butt of her rifle to break the lever off, and then she draw Joseph's arm over her shoulders again. They headed onward.

Joseph felt heavier than before. As they left the grid behind she found and squeezed his wrist; his skin was clammy, his pulse weak and unsteady beneath her fingers. _It's not just in his head_ , she thought, forcing them to move faster. _His body really thinks it's dying._ She clenched her teeth as they passed through a doorway and into a lightless hallway. _If I hadn't shot him in the first place, maybe they wouldn't have been able to use it against him…_.

In the dark, Mobius' basements were even more familiar. Juli led them through hallways and down a powerless escalator, into the furthest reaches of the facility. The server room gave her goose bumps, and they were forced to stop when a small group of security guards entered from the opposite end. With some stealthy maneuvering and patience, the pair of them managed to slip through without being detected at all. Two rooms later they weren't so lucky, but even so she managed to pick off both of the guards they ran into without taking fire.

It was easier, in the dark. She had no trouble pretending they were merely Ruvik's leftover wraiths.

Reaching the furthest chamber of the south wing took longer than Juli had hoped. Her nerves were frayed bare by the time they forced their way into the circular room, her mind alight with worry for her partners. The space inside was illuminated by half a dozen emergency lights gleaming in eerie white, and it took Juli a moment to realize that they were containment units, the lights filtered through liquid. They looked like aquariums, within each a collection of tubes leading into hunks of flesh.

A heart. A length of intestines. A pair of lungs. Each case appeared to be powered by a battery backup—evidently Mobius was keen on keeping the organs in good shape. Juli glanced from one to the next and felt Joseph shivering at her side.

"We're too late," he said.

"No." Juli swallowed and pulled him closer to the lungs. In the gleam from the cylinder she was able to make out the instrument panel. "No, these have been here for weeks. These are…Ruvik's original organs." She squinted into the dark beyond the grisly collection and saw a red light blinking on and off from behind a set of rolling curtains: the distress signal of a piece of medical equipment.

"Over there," she said, pointing it out. "Let's check it out."

She heard voices coming from behind the door they'd entered through. Hissing a curse, she let Joseph go and rushed back, dragging over a nearby desk to try and block it. The men arrived a moment later, shoving their weight into the door, and Juli's heels screeched across the floor as she was budged. Before she could regain her footing, Joseph was beside her. He shoved the muzzle of his gun through the narrow opening of the door and fired to drive the men back, and during their retreat, Juli was able to grab up a metal IV pole. Together they dismantled the wheeled end and shoved the rest through the door's handles, pinning it shut.

"That won't hold them for long," Joseph said as they retreated deeper into the chamber.

"If this works, it won't have to," replied Juli.

She pushed the curtains aside to reveal a metal cage, fifteen foot square. The links were thin but spaced closely together, too dense for even a finger to worm through. Juli went immediately for the door, bashing the lock in with her rifle, as Joseph pressed up close against the mesh.

"He's in there," he said, the red light reflected in his glasses. "He's been intubated."

Juli hands slipped against her gun; they were slick with sweat, and she had to wipe her palms on her pants before she could continue. _He's alive._ She finally damaged the lock well enough to open the door and let them both inside. _This is it, then. Please don't kill us, Ruvik._

Inside the cage was an IV stand with a dosing machine, a small cart with a heart-rate monitor and a respirator, and next to them, an examination table upon which Ruvik had been laid out. He was still dressed in sweatpants and an undershirt, as if Mobius had deposited him on the table and abandoned him there as quickly as possible. A tube had been shoved down his throat to help him breathe, an IV needle in his elbow. His eyelids had been taped shut.

Joseph slumped against the table, depending on it to stay upright as he disconnected the IV bag from the port in Ruvik's arm. "He's in deep sedation," he said. "We'll need some kind of reversal agent."

Juli left the cage, pushing the curtains further back so some of the emergency lights could help illuminate her search. There was a medical cabinet nearby stocked with various bottles, some of which labeled with names she vaguely recognized, and she scooped up armfuls of them. "I don't know anything about anesthesia," she admitted as she returned. "But I'm pretty sure that if we give him the wrong thing, it could kill him."

She set the bottles out next to the heartrate monitor, and when she looked up, Joseph was fitting the headphones over Ruvik's ears. Her heart skipped. "I don't know if that will work while he's unconscious...."

"We have to try," Joseph replied, which of course she already knew. His hands were shaking a little as he took up the control box. He looked to Juli, and they shared a nod. If anything went wrong, at least they were in it together. He flipped the switch.

The walls of the cage melted away. The medical equipment was replaced with an old, wooden work bench, the examination table with a moldy cot. Stone walls swelled out of the shadows, covered in line after line of scribbled writing and anatomical drawings. A pair of mannequins huddled in one corner and there was a strong smell of rot in the air that made everything dense and suffocating. Juli's hair stood on end.

"How are you here?"

Joseph and Juli turned. A heavy oak door guarded the exit, and it was there that they spotted Ruvik: tattered robe over scarred flesh, hood pushed back to display cracks in his Plexiglas skull. His hands were bloodied and fingernails cracked, matching the mauled door frame. He faced his visitors with mania in his eyes and demanded, "Where is Sebastian?"

***

When Sebastian opened his eyes, he was lying on the couch in his apartment. He had slept in his work clothes and there was a half empty beer bottled tucked in the crook of his arm. For a moment he thought that maybe it had all been one long, crazy dream, and he made up his mind to not move for the rest of his life.

But the light pouring in through the far window was a sick, fleshy orange, and a hot breeze was whistling through the apartment. He could feel the world shifting beneath his back, could sense its layers stacking one on top of the other in a dense, grinding expanse just beyond the walls. Ruvik had left plenty behind for him.

Sebastian shoved the bottle to the floor and sat up. His living room looked just as he had left it a lifetime ago, but his kitchen was gone—torn from the building, leaving broken studs and dribbling pipes reaching into open air. Sebastian edged closer, shielding his eyes from the unearthly glare, and was treated to a familiar view of his home town: Krimson City in ruins, entire buildings upended, streets fractured and twisted into impossible angles, blocks separated by massive rifts striking deep into the earth. The sky gleamed and pulsed as if the city were encased in a giant, illness-stricken organ. Though he hadn't laid eyes on it while inside Ruvik's mind the last time, he somehow knew that the gruesome vista had been there, just beyond Beacon's walls. He wondered if it would please Ruvik to know that the world he left behind had not changed much in his absence.

 _Well, you're still alive, so far,_ Sebastian thought, heading into the bedroom. He opened the closet and shoved his clothes out of the way. _At least, it seems that way. Would you even be able to tell the difference at this point?_ There was a case hidden in the back, and he pulled from it the .45 cal revolver. It was a beauty: a rare restoration with a five and half inch barrel and hard-cased finish. He could have dreamed up anything, and there would likely be cause to later, but for the moment he was glad to have retrieved a weapon of his own as if it were the real thing.

The building was intact enough that Sebastian didn't have any trouble making his way down to the street. He kept his weapon ready, anticipating an ambush from the haunted undead, or even the slick, black tentacles of remnant Leslie. But there was nothing. He strode out into the middle of the ruptured street and took in the apocalyptic setting, realizing with a chill that there were no creatures left after all, not even their remains. Except for the wind through the cracks, the city was quiet. The war was over.

"So now what?" Sebastian muttered. He turned in a circle and spotted Beacon rising in the distance, its tower leaning but mostly intact. A light gleamed from the top, blaring out over the deserted landscape, unmoving. He watched it a moment, hair raising with the sensation that it was still watching him. But nothing stirred.

"Light's on; nobody's home." Sebastian holstered his revolver and took in a deep breath, held it, let it out. "Guess it's mine, now."

He closed his eyes. Just like in Ruvik's mind, he could feel the space around him twist and flex beneath the press of his thoughts. _It's just data_ , he told himself, concentrating. _It's building blocks._ Movement stirred at the edge of his senses and set his heart racing. _I can remake everything._

Sebastian took a step forward, and the wind died. A few more and the scrape of concrete beneath his shoes became a tap of marble. He opened his eyes and found himself yet again in Beacon's front reception hall, bloody smears where bodies had once lay.

"Fuck." Sebastian scrubbed his face. _Okay, maybe not that easy after all,_ he thought. But then he was struck with an idea, and he headed for the side hall just as he and Ruvik had done. He followed a familiar path past glowing windows and empty cells, into the south ward where he had woken up a dozen times before. At the time, it had felt like a reprieve, but as he entered the nurse's station he was ablaze with determination, and he found exactly what he was hoping for: Tatiana Gutierrez was seated behind the desk in her red sweater and nurse cap.

Sebastian pulled his gun out as he approached. She was reading a newspaper and didn't seem to notice him, even once he was directly opposite her. So he rang the bell.

Tatiana lifted her head. "Detective Castellanos," she greeted without any inflection, just as he remembered. "I didn't expect to see you back here."

"Neither did I, believe me," Sebastian replied, thumbing the revolver's hammer without drawing it back. He stared hard into her face, hoping to detect some trace of human emotion, maybe even a glimpse of her memories, but she was paper thin and utterly indifferent. A ghost, not unlike any of the shambling corpses he had expected to find. "But here we are. Looks like you're the last one standing."

Tatiana—or rather, her phantom—folded the newspaper delicately and placed it aside. "Yes," she said, leaning back. "It would appear that way."

"Are you the last of Ruvik's leftovers?" Even knowing she wasn't real and there was no point in harassing her, Sebastian couldn't help his anger. "Or are you only here because I wanted you to be?"

She scoffed. "Don't flatter yourselves."

"So what are you, then?" Sebastian asked impatiently. "Why did you help me the last time?"

"I wasn't helping you," Tatiana replied. "I was opposing Ruvik." She pushed to her feet. "As I will anyone who tries to rule this world."

Something struck Sebastian in the back of the knees, and involuntarily he sat. He knew right away from the press of the metal what it was, but by then the ligatures were snapping around his wrists, the crown piece screeching as it plunged onto his scalp. Growling curses he fought back, ignoring the needles that jabbed into his arms. "Fuck!" He glared at Tatiana as the nurse's desk peeled away, allowing her to approach him unhindered. "What the hell are you?"

"Just another ghost." Tatiana stopped in front of him; he honestly wasn't sure if he preferred that cool gaze of hers with its hints of cruelty, or devoid of anything, as it was then. "A memory that was left behind." She shook her head. "I wouldn't expect you to understand."

Sebastian clenched his teeth as the machine whirred and whined behind him, building power. _She's not so special_ , he thought, thinking back through the myriad of creatures and apparitions he'd faced. He looked past her to the shadow she was casting against the wall, its shoulders broader than could have belonged to her. _If Ruvik didn't make her, then she was here—Gutierrez was in STEM at some point. She and her fucking boss left something behind._ He dug his fingernails into the chair's arms. _And sooner or later, they'll be back. You can't just survive until then, you have to take control._

Sebastian squeezed his eyes shut and again honed his concentration as best he could. _This world is yours now_ , he told himself fiercely, and he felt the earth rock beneath him in answer. _You can remake it._

The chair streaked away from under his hands. Everything spun, and when he opened his eyes, he was sitting behind the wheel of his Ford CrownVic, idling in his driveway. The passenger door opened, and he caught only a glimpse of Myra's gray jacket as she leapt from the car. Wailing sirens and flashing lights were left in her place, but it was the smell that bore into Sebastian from all sides, pinning him to the memory like a bug on a specimen board. That terrible burning—that stench of smoke and ash—it tunneled up through his brain, and he drew into himself, trying to block it out.

"No," he said, lowering his head so he wouldn't be able to see the blaze that was turning the insides of his eyelids red. "No, I'm not doing this." A voice rose over the roar of the flames and fire trucks: a frail scream that almost ripped his heart out through his ribs. He knew it was false—nothing could have been expelled from those tiny, clogged lungs—but he shook anyway, drawing upon rage when all other emotions failed him. "This isn't what I want!"

The smoke and the fire and the emergency crews fled. The leather seats became a sofa, the light staining his eyes became soft. Plush carpet blossomed under his suddenly bare feet and he could smell a roast in the oven, savory and unburnt. " _No_ ," he said even before the house could finish being built around him. He could feel the icy fingers of the STEM raking across the ridges in his gray matter, eager to make his every bitter memory a scathing reality. "Not this."

His ears rattled with the soft pad of little socks in the hall. "Daddy?"

Sebastian tasted bile, and he forced himself to his feet. "No!" he shouted defiantly. "I'm not playing this fucking game!"

Gravity reversed, and Sebastian fell backwards as the world overturned. He passed through the hall of the home he'd made as if it were an endless well, a flash of green socks streaking past. But he remembered falling. With his teeth on edge he shoved his feet against the tilting earth. Hardwood turned to tile, burning his soles, and the walls darkened to Beacon's abandoned corridors. Just when he thought he would tumble over, he forced himself to turn through sheer force of will, facing the gaping black before him. On the balls of his feet he ran down the slope until everything began to right itself like a tilting plane, plunging him back into the ward with Tatiana before him.

 _Just like Ruvik would do_ , he thought, and for the first time Tatiana's face registered surprise as he grabbed her around the throat.

He pushed, and when Tatiana fell back it was into a porcelain bathtub. The water gushed out, soaking them, before sloshing back over her face. Her nails drew blood from Sebastian's arm as she struggled, and the STEM chamber that rose around them spun and groaned in complaint, but he didn't relent. His determination gave him all the strength he needed to keep her pinned as his other hand snatched up the needle holstered at the tub's head.

"If you really are a piece of Gutierrez, then you know all about Mobius," he said, dragging Tatiana's head above the water. The shock in her face felt like victory. Bit by bit the room built up around them: five tubs, the surrounding workstations, the slab where they'd carved into his skull—everything he could remember from just before being plugged in. "You know this building, and everyone in it. And you're going to show me."

He jabbed the needle into her skull. Immediately she went still, and chamber was drawn into better focus. As Sebastian eased her into a sustainable position the STEM core above their heads began to hum, drawing from her what scattered fragments of her memory remained. He watched ghosts take wispy shape and flit from one computer to the next, reenacting some average day in the life of a psychotic cult member. They were joined by an apparition of Tatiana herself, and Sebastian kept a particularly close eye on her as she passed each of her workers, drawing their faces and names into the nightmare.

"You did connect to the STEM at some point, didn't you?" he mused, spotting the ghost of the nurse Anvi leaning over a test subject in one of the tubs. "How did Ruvik not know?"

Anvi straightened up and beckoned for someone to come closer. Sebastian followed her gesturing and flinched; Ruvik was among Mobius' cloudy wraiths. He was somewhat more presentable than Sebastian had ever seen him in person, a button down and slacks replacing his hooded cloak, cloth bandages covering his hands and head. He approached Anvi with Dr. Jimenez a few steps behind. Sebastian leaned closer as they conversed, but Tatiana was on the other side of the room, and though she took notice of them whatever they were talking about never reached her memory.

 _Ruvik._ Sebastian moved closer anyway, captivated by the bits of scar tissue visible through his dressings. _No, Ruben. They all knew him, long before they cut him up and put him in the STEM for good._ He turned in place, eyeing the men and women who would soon betray and butcher their compatriot. The memory he had borrowed from Ruvik was still close beneath his surface, and he wondered if he would find its mirror if he delved deeper into Tatiana. Could he watch through her eyes as she dissected a conscious man without remorse? Would he find his wife watching from behind the observation glass? The thought boiled his blood.

 _These Mobius fuckers don't care about Krimson City_ , Sebastian thought as he marched back to Tatiana's bathtub. _It's not home to them. They don't care about anything in my past, either._ He gripped the slick edge and glared at Tatiana even though her wide eyes were blank and glossy like a computer monitor. _But maybe they care about here._

"Show me everything," Sebastian demanded, "so I can make this place a hell they deserve."

***

A woman's scream echoed down through the ceiling. Joseph and Juli both flinched, gazing upward with trepidation as the voice was broken with pleading sobs and a sharp squelching of meat.

Ruvik drew in tight. He had heard his mother beg for her life so many times that frustration more than anything twisted him nearly to pieces. Over and over, trapped within the cell his father had made for him, he had listed to her heels on the tile as she called his name. Time after time she was silenced by the knife, its weight still embedded in the palms of his hands. She had died a hundred deaths by him already. Leslie had a very self-centered concept of purgatory.

"Where did you come from?" Ruvik asked again as he abandoned the immovable door frame, brimming with fiery impatience. "Where is he?"

"They took him—" Juli was interrupted by Beatriz's final death gurgles. "Christ, who is up there?"

"Never mind that," Ruvik snapped. "Where is…."

Again he didn't finish; it was then that he really took notice of Joseph. The man's skin was as pale as his own, and from the chest down he was soaked in entirely too much blood. Ruvik's heart thudded, but it wasn't just Joseph's pain echoing into him. Sebastian's anguish burned preemptively at the back of his mind as he hurried closer and pushed the shredded remains of Joseph's shirt aside.

A gunshot wound. The blood flowing from the ragged hole was dark, and with so much of it spent already, he had minutes at the most. Ruvik's face screwed with anger as he tried to bury the spark of dread beneath it. How dare the motivation for all their struggle be so careless.

"Who did this to him?" He urged Joseph to sit on the cot and pushed a stool closer for himself. "Was it Lim?" He scowled. "Sebastian's wife?"

"What?" said Kidman. "No—he hasn't been shot. There's nothing there."

Ruvik's brow furrowed, and he almost called her a fool, but then he looked again. He pressed his palm flat to the wound, and though Joseph hissing in pain threatened to confuse his senses, the blood melted away. Two ribs were fractured and more that would be very sore, but there was no hole, no threat of impending death.

"Can you see it?" Joseph asked hoarsely.

"I could," Ruvik replied, and suddenly he realized that there was more: he could feel Joseph's anxiety and desperation, hear echoes of the Administrator's voice haunting his ears. He sat up straighter. "I can see you now."

"Can you help him?" asked Juli. "I think he's remembering when I shot him in STEM. His pulse is so weak…."

"Interesting," Ruvik murmured, and he took Joseph's head in both hands. For a moment Joseph tried to pull back, and his resistance flared against Ruvik's invading mind just like the unfathomable black hole that had rebuffed him at the police station. But Ruvik remained firm, peeling away the outer senses that had Joseph so fooled. Buried within the tangle of lying neurons were memories steeping in bitter emotion even he hesitated to penetrate.

Joseph shuddered, hands clenching against his knees as the Administrator's voice reverberated louder than ever between them. Juli watched him squirm and said, "Ruvik, please don't hurt him."

"I'm not," Ruvik retorted. He closed his eyes for a moment and it was even easier to see through the haze into that brightly-lit chamber full of heartless specters. Into the chair. He hummed, not sure whether to be impressed or to scorn himself for merely being dim as he partook of Joseph's experience. "I think I understand now how Mobius' control works."

He let go, and Joseph sagged, his breathing faint. He was probably reliving at least part of his conditioning and Ruvik had no qualms putting to words the truths unlocked from his mind. "They start with the drugs," he said as he reached behind him, picking a narrow forceps off the work table. "Something of their own concoction, I imagine, to help reduce your mental capacity. To make you incredibly susceptible to hypnotic suggestion."

"Hypnosis?" Juli repeated. "Seriously?"

"Did you think it was more complicated?" Ruvik gripped Joseph's shoulder with his free hand and plunged the forceps into the imaginary wound.

Joseph quaked and cried out, but Ruvik dug his fingers into his clavicle to keep him from escaping. "Their methods seem to be as primitive as Jimenez once said," Ruvik carried on as he worked the forceps. "They use torture to create for you a horrific memory, crafted from what they know of your fears and regrets. They humiliate you. Then they encourage you to repress it, using your mind's own protective instincts against you. Healing the physical scars they've inflicted faster than should be possible helps to confuse your system further."

The instrument scraped against something that wasn't bone, and Ruvik turned his wrist so he could pinch it. "In Joseph's case, he was halfway there already," he said, ignoring Joseph gripping his elbow. "I had laid him open for them. All they had to do was convince him that betraying them would lead him back to _me_."

He pulled the forceps out with a jerk. Joseph rocked and coughed, reaching instinctively for his chest. "Fear is a powerful motivator," Ruvik talked over his sputtering. He let the bullet go, and it dissipated into the air even before it hit the floor. "But shame and guilt even more so. They turned your weakness and insecurity against you to ensure compliance."

Ruvik tossed the forceps aside and reached forward, sneaking his hand beneath Joseph's to again palm the open wound. "It's really no surprise it worked so well," he said as he convinced the flesh it had already been healing for days. He fixed Joseph with a sharp look. "You know all about _shame_ , don't you, Joseph?"

Joseph was still catching his breath, but his eyes hardened as he glared back at Ruvik. "Fuck you."

Juli made a startled face, but Ruvik couldn't help but smirk. "Cas will be glad to see you back," he said, and by the time he drew his hand away, the wound was gone. "Now. Where is Sebastian?"

Juli put a hand reassuringly on Joseph's shoulder. "They took him to the STEM," she said, and Ruvik tensed all over. "We weren't able to get in, but he seemed to think you would help us."

"You're wearing the headphones," Joseph added as he rubbed his chest. The color was already coming back into his cheeks. "But you're sedated. We don't know with what. And Mobius—"

"It'll be faster if you show me," said Ruvik.

He offered his hand to Juli—she had been fully coherent for much longer, and Joseph was still fragile enough that he didn't want to get drawn into that trauma. Juli regarded him as warily as if he was a viper, but after a moment she accepted. As soon as their hands touched her mind opened to him, and with the help of his transmitter he was able to delve back through her memories with ease. He saw the cage he was kept in, the guards they had eluded through the dark, the bloody confrontation with Agent Lim. Those incidents he flew past, interested only in Sebastian's fate.

He wasn't expecting what he found: Sebastian cuffed to a bed, broken and on the verge of defeat. It set a wholly unexpected and unfamiliar emotion blazing through his chest. He sank into Juli's senses, remembering with her the weight of Sebastian in her arms as he cried. The dampness of tears against her collar drove him out of his mind far more effectively than the tortures he'd suffered the past hours, and he shook with fury.

Juli flexed her hand against his. "Ruvik…?"

Beatriz began to scream again above them, but it was Ernesto's voice joining hers that spurred Ruvik back to himself. "You need to read the labels on the medications you found," he said. "I'll tell you which to administer."

It wasn't as easy as Ruvik had hoped, fighting off the surrounding nightmare to see through Juli's eyes. He could feel Leslie pacing just beyond the door. Even when the real world bled through the illusion, giving him his first real look at his captivity, he could see mounds of squirming black flesh waiting for him outside the cage. Joseph eyed them warily; Ruvik was surprised that he could see them at all, until he remembered the unique compatibility they had shared within STEM. He tried to put it out of his mind as Juli checked the drugs that had been fed through the IV.

"Caenobarbital," she reported. "And Soventanyl. Never heard of them."

"They're Mobius's own creations," said Ruvik, struggling to remember Anvi's prattling, the few times they had worked together with a subject. "Look for Xylazine, or…Athazine, I think she called it."

Julie pored over the bottles while Joseph found and prepared a fresh syringe. "Got'em! Both of them."

"Give me five milligrams of each."

Joseph measured the dose. Despite having been half dead only minutes ago, his hands were steady as he injected the dose into the port still in Ruvik's arm. Ruvik watched, looking at himself from the outside for the first time, and he was struck by just how much he still resembled Leslie. In the dark of the cage there was no telling that his hair had changed color, leaving only a pale, thin young man in uneasy slumber. Joseph peeled the tape from his eyes and it gave him a chill.

Juli turned toward the exit, and through her Ruvik saw when she did the Mobius guards breaking through their meager barricade. Cursing, she only had enough time to yank the cage door shut before they opened fire. Ruvik instinctually ducked with her only to realize a moment later that his real body was behind him, which Joseph was pulling off the table to try to shield him.

Fortunately, the cage mesh was thick and dense enough that most of the bullets became lodged or were repelled rather than breaking through. The guards paused in their firing to rush forward, rifles still poised and flashlights blinding as they fanned out to cover the cage's only entrance. Ruvik could see and hear all half dozen through Juli's senses but otherwise they were utterly blank to him, even more so than he was used to from Mobius' agents.

"Toss your weapons into the corner!" the lead guard ordered. "Then get on your knees, hands on your head."

Ruvik lowered his gaze to the guards' feet, where Leslie's own soldiers squirmed, invisible to them. If only Leslie were a bit more like his host, he probably would have been smug. "Do what she tells you," he said.

"What?" Juli edged deeper into the cage. "They'll just kill us."

"Toss your weapons!" the woman said again. "Now!"

"The cage is shielding them from me," Ruvik insisted. "If I'm going to fight back they need to be inside." He fixed her with a hard stare. "Trust me, Kidman."

It was tall order, certainly. Juli struggled with the decision, but when she looked to Joseph, he was already tossing his gun away. With a deep breath she did the same and then laced her fingers behind her head. "I hope you know what you're doing."

Ruvik stood as a pair of guards stepped forward. "Leslie," he said, placing himself directly in their path. "I can't give you want you want if these Mobius fools kill us all." The guards kept their guns up as the cage door squealed open. "I know there's enough of me in you to see that much reason."

The first guard stepped in, and immediately Ruvik felt the pressure of his thoughts. Like all Mobius' accursed henchmen he was clouded, memories bludgeoned into submission by Tatiana's crude, cruel science. But Ruvik finally understood. Rather than risk entering the pawn's dulled mind as would have been his instinct, he focused only on the muscles and the nerves that governed them, guiding the man's hand to his belt. He yanked the pin from a flash grenade.

"Close your eyes," he said, and the man turned toward him as if he'd heard, but it was too late.

The grenade went off in a blaze of white light. Joseph and Juli covered their eyes in time, which blinded Ruvik as well, but he didn't need them any longer. He turned the guard around and had him shoot into his comrades, stepping back through the cage entrance to block their shocked counter fire. Even when the guard took a shot through his jaw Ruvik forced him to continue firing, round after round until all but two of the guards were downed.

The remaining pair retreated, and Ruvik let his puppet go; he slumped to the floor, gurgling as the blood in his throat choked him. Juli opened her eyes, granting Ruvik sight again, but then he was overcome with with a sudden nausea, and everything blurred into black tendrils. When he tried to blink them away, his vision was overwhelmed by Joseph's face as seen from below. His body was waking up.

Ruvik tried to take in a breath, only to be thwarted by the tube lodged in his throat. He gagged and squirmed, clawing at the tape holding it in place until his hands were urged down. "Hold on," said Joseph, removing the tape and then gripping the tube. "Just relax—try to exhale."

Ruvik did so, wincing as the tube was pulled free. Once it was out he rolled onto his side, coughing as his lungs struggled to resume breathing on their own. Joseph's steadying hand on his shoulder made his skin crawl, but he needed the support; he was still drowsy from the medications, his limbs heavy and barely responsive. _Where's Leslie?_ He tried to keep still as Joseph removed the IV port from his arm as well, using his tie to apply a pressure bandage. _He must still be close._

He heard gunshots that sounded more like Juli's pistol than the rifles, but his eyes weren't focusing enough for him to see her, and he couldn't sense her within the cage. "Help me up," he said. "I need to get out of this cage."

Joseph scooped him up. It wasn't very dignified but Ruvik was in no position to complain. As soon they were outside the cage he was able to sense Juli again; she was firing into the hallway to drive back more guards. When her pistol clicked, emptied, they tried to come forward again, but she discarded it in favor of a rifle snatched from one of the previously downed agents. She hit at least one as they were forced to retreat again.

Joseph ducked behind one of the room's specimen tubes, shielding them from the firefight. "That was really you in there, wasn't it?" he asked warily. "You do still have all your powers from STEM…."

"Put me down here, and go help Kidman fend them off," said Ruvik. "It might take me a while to handle them."

Joseph lowered his feet to the floor, giving him a moment to adjust. Ruvik's knees weren't as stable as he had hoped and he had to cling to the tubing to stay upright. As soon as he could be sure he wouldn't collapse, he waved Joseph off. "Go. When I'm ready, you'll know."

Once Joseph had moved to aid Juli's defense of the doorway, Ruvik closed his eyes and took in a deep breath, making sure the headphone were secure against his head. He could feel the guards moving about in the hall. They were still ugly blots against his vision, but understanding their source made them bearable. He picked carefully at each of them, searching for the agent most vulnerable to his manipulation. _We don't have time for this_ , he thought madly as he pressed his forehead to the glass, letting the warmth of the lights inside draw his senses back into function against the drugs. _Sebastian needs my help._

"Ruben."

Ruvik's eyes flew open, but before he could fully comprehend the voice in his ear, he got a good look at the specimen housed before him: a pair of lungs. They were well preserved, nutrients being fed to them through the tubes. The casing itself had no identifying marks on its console but he knew immediately that they were his, and his chest clenched with the memory of his ribs splitting open. _Have they done the same to him?_ Fear and wrath threatened to turn his flesh inside out again as his fists shook against the glass. _If they took him to the STEM already_ ….. He wanted to scream, but then he realized his face wasn't the only one reflecting in the glossy surface of the case.

At least, it ought to have been one face; Leslie was standing next to him, watching the lungs quiver. Having seen him from the outside so recently, Ruvik was struck by how different the apparition looked. Leslie's downturned eyes had never been so bitter, his manner so still. Even the basic contours of his chin and cheekbones were slightly off, like a sketch done without a reference. For some reason, it made Ruvik cringe. Then he noticed the pair of hands resting on Leslie's shoulders, and he lifted his gaze, his heart thudding with each crease in red sleeves, every gentle curl in black hair.

"Laura," he whispered, and she smiled at him. It almost tore him in two—he had feared that after their last encounter, he would never see her true face again. But when he glanced to her image reflecting in the glass, he reminded himself of what he was really seeing.

Neither specter could be trusted. Her chin and cheekbones were no more accurately carved than Leslie's, and the sound of her voice, which he had so cherished, was nothing more than an echo from imperfect ears. He had warped her too far from her original self to even be considered a ghost. She had always been dead. He had always been alone.

 _Neither of them are real,_ Ruvik thought, vibrating with anger. Leslie turned hateful eyes on him, and in that moment at least, he was sure they looked exactly the same. _It's just me. Why am I wasting time punishing myself for things I wouldn't take back? He's not my burden, he's my weapon._

__

He pushed away from the glass case and faced the doorway that his compatriots were struggling to defend. Leslie did the same, and then he stepped forward, heading toward the firefight. "Leslie," Ruvik murmured as he watched Leslie's skin grow black and tarry, his hair twisting into tentacles. "If I regret anything, it's only that I didn't erase you completely to begin with." His fingernails dug troughs in his palms. "You didn't deserve to be made into this."

Leslie surged forward as a mound of writhing flesh. Once he reached the doorway he stretched and expanded, sealing the opening in a solid wall. The Mobius guards fired into it at first, bewildered, but seeing no reaction they retreated further into the hallway to confer on a new strategy.

"What the hell is this?" Juli demanded as she backed away. "Is this you?"

"Stay away from the doorway," said Ruvik. "They can still shoot into the room, and we'll be in trouble if they decide to use a grenade."

They moved to Ruvik's side. "If it's just an illusion," said Joseph, "there's nothing stopping them from coming inside and shooting us."

"Yes, but they don't know that."

"I can take care of them for you," said Laura, and Ruben shivered all over at the sound of her voice. "One last time."

"No," he replied quickly. He forced himself to look her in the face, ignoring Joseph and Juli staring at him in confusion. The thought of watching her burn to cinders again for the sake of his rage turned his stomach. "No, you've…done enough." He took a deep breath, letting it rattle about behind his ribs. He released her sleeve. "Thank you. Laura."

Laura's smile deepened; he prayed that his memory of at least that much was true. "Goodbye, little brother," she said, and she touched the control piece dangling from his headphones, turning the output up to its maximum setting.

Ruvik took in another full breath as the transmitter cast his mind out across the compound. Black holes were gathered in the corridor just outside their chamber, and more black holes were rushing to block exits and relay orders, and even more black holes were being herded back to their departments as part of their crises training. Ruvik could feel their traumas flicker off them like ash, each of them in their own state of decay. He despised every one of them. Unlike the glimmering lights of the STEM that had welcomed him to godhood, his subjects now were scampering, soulless rodents, and he dreaded having to crack each of them open. At least two hundred tainted insects were in need of a boot when all he had were his fingers.

And then he felt it: a beacon lit among the vermin, warming his skin. When he turned his full attention toward it, the light swallowed him up, blinding and pawing. The eye of the completed STEM was upon him. For all that he had commanded when he had made up its core, he had never experienced it from the outside: the way its raw energy swarmed over and through him, laying bare his weary mind. He caught glimpses of another world just within his reach. The raging fire and choking smoke at its edges kept him at bay at first, but then he was within its folds, the light piercing all through him as if he were merely a channel.

Joseph grabbed him around the waist. It wasn't until he was being dragged deeper into the room that he realized one of the agents had tossed a grenade after all, and he and his comrades dove for cover behind the furthest of the specimen cases. The explosion shattered glass and sent instruments flying, threw organs to the floor and filled the room with foul smoke. Ruvik gripped the headphones, trying to focus on the advancing agents to determine which he could use, but he was still sluggish from the drugs, and when he tried to enter their minds all he heard was Adam's voice in his ears.

"It's him—he's awake!" one of the agents shouted, signaling to his fellows. "Shoot him before—"

The man's head split open beneath a gunshot, helmet and all. Blood and brain sprayed the man on his left, and the agents whirled, startled by the unexpected angle of attack. They fired, but the smoke twisted and lurched as if alive, two more invisible bullets cleaving two more skulls. A translucent wraith swept through Mobius' ranks with swift, lethal force. One after another the agents were shot dead, until every body was crumbled and only their killer remained, gradually taking full shape.

Ruvik shoved Joseph's arm off him and hurried forward. Even though he should have guessed what had happened, watching Sebastian's apparition solidify took his breath away. He wasn't just some pale ghost, he was blazing and vibrant, the STEM's churning omnipotence at his back. Through him Ruvik could feel the expanse that had once been his, remolded into a fresh hell waiting just on the edge of a fragile boundary. His world had a new god and he was struck with awe.

Sebastian's arms were around him. Though to the eye he may have been only glimmering vapor, Ruvik clearly felt the warmth of his body that had become so familiar to him. "Ruvik," said Sebastian with elation Ruvik hadn't expected from him. "Thank God; I thought they might have cut you up by now."

Ruvik tried to take a breath and almost couldn't, as if Sebastian's arms were squeezing his lungs too tightly for any air to be drawn in. How could he be so strong when he had recently been so fragile in Juli's arms? "Likewise," Ruvik said, only once he was sure his voice would hold. "Are you—"

"Still in one piece," Sebastian assured. "More or less."

Ruvik winced. He started to reply, but he was distracted by a sensation of fingers worming through his thoughts. His memories from the last several hours fell open like book pages, each flashing across his eyes and twisting his insides. The intrusion ought to have frightened him, but instead he held very still, too overwhelmed to protest.

Sebastian grumbled quietly as he leaned back. "Shit, Ruvik. I knew you'd be torturing yourself in there." He took up Ruvik's hands, rubbing his thumbs over his fingernails. "Sorry I couldn't keep up my end of our conditions."

 _Shut up_ , Ruvik thought, knowing Sebastian would hear it. _Just shut up._ He grabbed Sebastian with both hands, rose up on his toes and kissed him full on the mouth. Even as an apparition he tasted like cigarettes, and Ruvik swayed into him, earning strong arms around his back again. He didn't know what had become of his emotions; once more he felt small, and he wanted Sebastian all over him. He wanted to pull his skin around him like a cocoon and be remade in the image of Sebastian's new world. When Sebastian kissed him back, a ferocity swelled inside him. He relieved each of Sebastian's many horrors at Mobius' hands and ached to become a god of wrath.

***

"Sebastian?"

Sebastian leaned reluctantly back. He couldn't quite wrap his head around how he was even able to; all he knew for certain was that the moment he felt the telltale reverberations of Ruvik's power, he had reached for it. Their connection was as strong as ever and he could see, hear, and feel through Ruvik's senses as if he were in the room. When he looked to Joseph, it wasn't the same as really seeing him, not with Ruvik turned away. But he knew the shape of him through the various tensions in his muscles, making up a weary stance, a confused expression. An echo of guilt.

"Joseph." Sebastian wanted to be closer, and then he was, touching Joseph's shoulders. "Are you all right?" he asked, even though he knew immediately that he was.

Joseph flinched beneath his hands. "Seb, is this…really you?"

"Yeah." Sebastian waved one hand back and forth, tendrils of light swishing through the air. "Thanks to them."

Juli stepped hesitantly closer. "You're not…dead, right?"

"No—no, I'm…" When Ruvik turned, Sebastian was finally granted a real look at both of them, and their bruised, bloodied faces drew him tight. "Fuck. I don't know how to explain it. But I'm not a ghost." He nodded to Juli with gratitude. "Thank you, for trusting me."

"I'm sorry," said Joseph abruptly, and Sebastian drew his attention back. "Seb, I'm so sorry, I didn't—"

"It's not your fault," Sebastian interrupted him. "Don't apologize."

Joseph's frustration and grief hummed from him, rippling out as if across a pool. "But you're only here because of _me_ ," he insisted, pain in his voice. "You tried to tell me and I—"

" _Joseph_. Don't." Sebastian lifted his hand to the back of Joseph's neck and gave it a firm, reassuring squeeze. "I understand, okay? I know what they put you through. It is _not_ your fault—it's Mobius. And they're gonna pay for it."

Joseph nodded, but he wasn't convinced. Sebastian felt it easily, and then realized just how much _more_ there was behind it. Not just his current, tangled thoughts and emotions—Joseph's entire life and history lay beneath his fingertips. In moments he could learn more about his partner than he had over years of working side by side. He could answer every question he'd ever had, understand Joseph's perceptions and biases from the inside out. It wouldn't take any effort at all.

"I don't recommend that," said Ruvik.

"What do you want us to do, just _leave_?" Juli said crossly. "You know they'll never—"

"He doesn't mean that," said Sebastian. He shook the temptation off of him and stepped back to better face them all, more or less. "They have me in the STEM chamber, but they shot me up with one of Ruvik's drugs. I don't think I can wake up on my own let alone move. Can you get to me?"

"Of course," said Ruvik. "If you'll clear us a path."

He offered his hands, and without hesitating Sebastian took them. He felt the familiar tug of Ruvik's mind, winced against the shrill hum of the transmitter, and then everything opened. Like light through a prism his consciousness passed through Ruvik and splintered across Mobius' headquarters, alighting on every spot of black that occupied its labs and halls. He had already mapped its layout to his new world thanks to Tatiana's knowledge, along with a great deal of its personnel. Now, with Ruvik's enhanced abilities casting him outward, he could see them. Just like Beacon. He burned with anticipation at the thought.

"Is this what it was like for you?" he asked. He tightened his hands against Ruvik's and felt as if every wretched soul in the place was between his fingers. It was overpowering and exhilarating.

"And more so," replied Ruvik. Sebastian had never seen him as intense as he was then; he could feel his heart racing. "The two of us together can do anything. If you're ready."

"There are more coming," said Juli, slinging a rifle from one of the agents over her shoulder. "I can hear them in the hall."

"So can I," said Sebastian, and he turned his attention toward the lab entrance.

Five armed agents were grouped in the hall just beyond the door. A senior agent was handing down orders through their radios: _shoot to kill_. They had no idea what they were up against, but their conditioning kept them obedient. There were some fears that went beyond a mysterious prisoner rumored to have psychic powers on the loose.

 _For now, at least_ , thought Sebastian, and he got his teeth in them.

Tatiana's drugs and the Administrator's hypnosis were no match for the STEM they were foolish enough to have recreated. Sebastian stripped away the blackness that surrounded and pervaded each agent, tunneled in through their ears to awaken every repressed memory, every sin committed in Mobius' name. Their psyches cracked open before him as easily as shredding paper, and he reveled in their fear. Each of them was his enemy—they deserved his judgment.

The world went red. Joseph and Juli flinched back as the agents began to scream, then choke. Smoke poured from their mouths and they were helpless; they didn't notice the air becoming steam, the corridor walls growing sharp and twisted. They were oblivious to the hulking figure gradually taking shape behind them with its great barrel chest, its heavy limbs, its angular head. None of them had any defense as the Keeper's mallet crushed their spines and pounded their skulls into lumps of meat, one by one, until not one human limb was recognizable.

Ruvik ventured into the hallway first, and he eyed The Keeper with approval. "Took a liking to this one, did you?" he asked.

The Keeper turned and lumbered on down the hall, dragging his sack behind. "He was always a pain in the ass," said Sebastian. "I can't think of anything I'd rather sic on these fuckers."

Ruvik smirked. "Oh, I think you can."

Joseph and Juli emerged from the chamber, weapons ready. Their uncertainty hung in the air as potently as the stench of blood. "Did it really just beat them to death?" Juli asked as they hurried past the mess and fell into step behind Ruvik. "Or did you just convince them it did?"

"Does it matter?" Sebastian replied. "Keep going; I'll cover you."

"Be careful," said Joseph. But it was a ridiculous notion and Sebastian didn't bother to respond.

He allowed his consciousness flow outward again. Rather than try to focus on the individual insects, he let everything come into him, enveloping the building's labs and hallways into the backdrop he had already prepared for them. Lights flickered and then shattered, casting sparks. Windows blackened with smoke and ash as if the inferno of hell lay beyond every wall. Every door and exit slammed shut, soldering into impenetrable barricades, and everyone who attempted to breach them found their palms blistered from the heat. Sebastian watched them scamper from one to the next like rats on a sinking ship. A few of Mobius' cultists had some inkling of what was happening, but that only made them more desperate. Within minutes, every agent, scientist, guard and bureaucrat had fallen into panic as the headquarters that was their home was engulfed in nightmare.

The agents reduced to a gooey pile had been receiving instructions by radio. Sebastian followed it back to the source, where a small group had holed up attempting to repair the chain of command. He let them see him—he _wanted_ them to see him, and to see Ruvik at his side. _It's only what you did to me_ , he thought as he cut through the swathes of repression that had already begun to split. Their raw trauma spilled forth, consuming and charring them. Their flesh grew black and flaking and cinders burned within their veins. _You all deserve this._ Their darkest secrets and most painful memories were nothing compared to what he had suffered at their hands, and hearing the Administrator's voice pouring from them only made him angrier, hastening their transformation into shrieking, red-eyed ghouls.

And Ruvik was there with him, glowing with feverish approval. They were only spirits but Sebastian could have sworn Ruvik's hand was in his, joining them even more closely than the night before as they watched the enemy crumble. "There's no need to hunt them all," he said. "If we target a few in each wing, they'll handle the rest."

"I'll leave that to you," replied Sebastian. "I'm going to open up the STEM chamber." His bitter eagerness drove the coal-like haunted into the hallways to seek their prey. "I need to speak to my wife."

"Be careful," said Ruvik, and Sebastian didn't want to listen to him, either, but then he continued. "I had a taste of what she's been hiding and even that was more than I was prepared for. Do not let her draw you in."

"Don't worry about me." The facility was already descending except for the one chamber closest to the center, and he was aching to tear it apart. "I just want you to focus on the Administrator." He let the core of the STEM pull him in. "Hurt him for us."

Ruvik's enthusiasm for the task vibrated between them. "With pleasure."

He vanished, and moments later Sebastian sensed him flashing between groups of armed agents, turning those he could and slaughtering others. Then he was in the labs, terrorizing so-called doctors, cutting the throats of screaming technicians. He moved between each area of the compound with clinical precision, warping Mobius' finest and most pathetic to his purpose. A group of analysts trying to contact the outside were murdered by their previously human assistants and a young tech in lab two boiled in her skin. Some accepted and even welcomed the death bestowed on them. Others had only moments to register horror after awakening to the realization that they had been only victims all along. Ruvik's vengeance was a thing of beauty and none were left untouched.

Sebastian left the wretches to their fate and turned his attention inward.


	17. Chapter 17

Myra watched the proceedings from a distance. Tatiana kept reporting that the readings were favorable, that as far as they could tell Sebastian was integrating perfectly, but she knew something was wrong. She looked at his sleeping face, eyes twitching beneath their lids, and was overwhelmed with a smell of smoke. It was clogging her sinuses with a choking sensation and she wanted to run.

"That's enough," she said. "Turn it off."

"We're not finished," Adam replied, still close at her side. "Not until Dr. Gutierrez has all the data she needs."

"Something isn't right. It shouldn't be working this well. Maybe—"

"Myra," Tatiana interrupted from her console. "We just need a little longer." She muttered something under her breath. "Anvi, I'm registering an erratic heartrate. Can you confirm it's not the sensors?"

Anvi approached Sebastian's tub and reached in, taking his pulse at the wrist. She froze. Myra saw it, and she took a breath to give a warning, but it was too late; Anvi burst into flames.

It took mere seconds for her to be consumed, so much faster than anyone was able to react to. The fire seared her hair and clothes, lips and eyelids. By the time she was able to scream her throat was already full of smoke, and the sound she made turned Myra's blood cold.

The nearest tech was next. He wasn't close enough to have touched her; the fire didn't spread so much as begin anew, erupting spontaneously all over his body. Then was a guard who was backing away—then another raising his gun with no idea what to shoot at. One by one they combusted and burned down, until the stench of burning flesh was everywhere, Myra transfixed by the sight.

She remembered fire—its violent hues and all-consuming odor were never far from her senses. She watched her colleagues burning to ash and wasn't sure whether to feel horror or sick elation. Her turn was coming. In moments she would join them, finally living through the fate that should have been hers.

Adam grabbed her by the elbow and yanked her toward the door, where Tatiana was pressing her hand to the scanner. The panel's surface began to hiss as it registered her print, and Tatiana cried out in pain. But she didn't pull her hand back until the scan had completed and the door began to open; her entire palm was scorched and blistering.

"Go," she said. "I'll shut it down."

Adam rushed out. Tatiana turned back toward the STEM and its chamber full of writhing, coal-black corpses. Myra didn't move. Her mind was utterly blank except for the roar of the flames, and when her shaky legs carried her back a step, it was directly into a man's body. Strong arms encircled her chest, as familiar and frightening as the blaze.

"We're going to have that conversation now," Sebastian said against her ear, and the STEM core rising before them became a burning house, the victims its kindling. She wasn't standing in the Mobius headquarters that had raised her, she was in the driveway of her suburban home with sirens all around and a towering pyre at the end of it. She couldn't move. She watched the flames spew black ash and still waited for her turn.

Sebastian's face was in her hair; he couldn't even face the memory he was subjecting her to. "Tell me this wasn't you," he said raggedly. "Please, Myra."

Myra sucked the poisoned air into her lungs. "She died in her sleep," she whispered, not bothering to fight as Sebastian's fingers dug into her shoulder. "She didn't feel anything—she didn't even know. It was the best I—"

" _Why_?" He squeezed until the gold of his wedding band burned into her jacket. "Tell me why!"

"Because I...." Myra shuddered; she could feel claws raking across her mind, prying at each instinct and memory in an attempt to split her open. "Because I had to," she confessed, her seams pulling loose. "I didn't want Adam to have her."

Sebastian groaned against her ear. The house in front of them stretched with a crackling growl as if in answer, clawing free of its foundations and swelling to monstrous proportions. Myra could only watch with aching eyes as the front door gaped wide and rushed toward them to swallow them whole.

The inside of the house was intact, but it was so cold and empty that the breath was sucked straight from Myra's lungs. Sebastian vanished from behind her back and she stumbled, catching herself against the stairway bannister. The layout and the furniture were just as they had been before the fire. Their photographs still blanketed the walls. Myra's eye caught on her daughter's face staring up from her swaddling clothes, and then next to her, a picture of Myra herself as a young girl, wearing a somber black dress. She had never seen it before; it shouldn't have existed at all.

"She was everything to me," said Sebastian, but his voice was reverberating from the walls and she couldn't see him. "You both were."

"You were everything to me, too," Myra replied as she moved down the line of photos. Some of them she remembered, but some were of Sebastian before she had known him, and some were impossible shots of her, all of them mixed together. "For a while."

The house rattled. "You can't lie to me anymore," he snarled. "You _killed_ her. We were _nothing_ to you!"

Myra picked up her pace, but the hallway continued to stretch before her, on and on, thousands of photographs taunting her from either side. She began to see crime scenes and laboratories among them, bodies split open, human subjects strapped down. "I can see them all now," Sebastian continued as she hurried past them. "Your fucking admin was right. You sabotaged all those cases."

"I didn't have a choice," said Myra. The house may not have been burning but she was still desperately overheated, and she shed her jacket. "No one could know."

"You killed witnesses!" Their portraits joined their family photos on the walls—gunshot wounds and cleaved skulls tucked in among Lily and her vibrant red Christmas dress. "Even victims—they trusted us!"

Myra clenched her fists as she sped up further, trying to escape the gauntlet. "You don't understand. I had to protect us!"

"Oh, I get it," said Sebastian, and finally she could see the tiled floor of the kitchen through the far doorway. "You were more concerned with keeping Mobius safe than us."

A young girl's voice rose from the end of the hall in a shrill scream. Myra's heart skipped, and she broke into a run. It sounded like Lily—it had to be Lily. It shouldn't have mattered but she ran anyway, bursting out of the hallway not into their family kitchen, but a laboratory lit by eye-burning fluorescent lights. Doctors in scrubs were crowded around an operating table, their gloves soiled red, and from between them a small, pale hand reached for her.

Myra fell on the doctors, ripping them away from the table. She used her elbows and knees, even snatched a scalpel out of the hand of one to slash his throat. She'd had this nightmare before. For weeks after giving birth she had dreamed of Tatiana and her team swarming over a tiny body on their slab. Her little girl was still screaming, and she screamed back, clawing and stabbing at her Mobius comrades until they all fell away, leaving her alone with the operating table and the lone stain of blood atop it.

Sebastian shoved her onto the table. She gagged at the blood soaking into her shirt but she fought, kicking with her heels. Her every effort passed straight through him, and then he was on top of her, pinning her back to the metal. Despite knowing better she looked up into his face, and the pained expression on his face halted her struggles.

"You should have told me," he said, his voice shaking as much as the hand he had twisted in her shirt collar. "If you wanted to get out I could have helped you."

Myra shuddered beneath him. "They would have killed you."

"They _did_ kill me!" he snapped back. " _And_ her. It wasn't mercy, Myra, you were only out to save yourself!" His fingers clenched and tugged as if he were unsure what to do with them; she could feel them through her skull again, digging in search of truth. "We could have brought Mobius down together if only you'd let me in."

_Bring down Mobius?_ The thought sent a jolt through her, fiercer than she'd expected, and her skin crawled. "There's no bringing down Mobius," she told him.

He shook his head. "I would have rather died trying than to lose Lily, and you knew that."

"This world needs Mobius," Myra insisted, the words rising up from a tomb inside of her. She had done and sacrificed too much to believe any differently. "Even if you kill all of us now, that won't change. What we're doing _matters_."

Sebastian regarded her with such shock and disgust that it would have curdled her blood if it wasn't already charred down to her marrow. "You killed our daughter to keep her out of their hands," he said, "and yet you're still defending them?"

It must have seemed so absurd to him, and maybe it was. Myra was crumbling piece by piece and she didn't care anymore. "I stand with Mobius." As soon as the words were out she took in a breath as if she could draw them back into her lungs, to saturate herself with them. "I already said I don't expect or want you to forgive me for that. But there was never a chance for her, Sebastian. For any of us."

Sebastian let go of her shirt, but he wasn't backing off. In fact, he was coiling tight. He was wedging the power he'd gained between her cracks. "If you could do it over," he said quietly, "you still wouldn't trust me, would you? You would just killer her again."

Myra stared straight back. The answer was so clear in her mind, ready to be devoured. "I would kill _you_ long before she could be born," she said. "The moment you started loving me."

She gave him what he wanted—she didn't have the means to do otherwise. The entirety of her history tore free, past mistakes and regrets laid bare like exposed bone. Decades of indoctrination, ceremonies and procedures she didn't even remember, the tapestry of lies that made up her world—she let him have them all. She _wanted_ him to know all that she had suffered, from Mobius' hands and from his. He deserved to know her every horror.

Sebastian reeled back, unprepared for her life gushing through his senses. But it wasn't just him partaking of her misery; the STEM itself fed on her sin, warping the already grotesque landscape her husband had crafted for her. It turned her inside out as if it had been eager to do so all along. Then Sebastian was gone, and when Myra looked around her, the operating table had become a stone alter. The lab was replaced with an underground chamber lit only by ancient candles, blood in the bricks.

"Sebastian?" Myra sat up, and her head spun. She took in the familiar, low-ceilinged room with a thrill of fear; she was below the Cedar Hill church.

_No, not here._ "Sebastian!" she shouted as she swung her feet to the floor and pushed away from the altar as fast as she could. His wrath was agony but she would have preferred it to the fetid air drawing goose bumps up her arms. _I can't be here_. She rushed to the doorway only to find it shut with sturdy metal bars. As a child she had been able to squeeze through them, but not anymore. She yanked and pushed and nothing moved.

A growl rumbled all through the walls, and Myra thought it was Sebastian returning to accuse her further. She turned to face him, only to find a collection of gleaming eyes watching her from the far shadows of the room, a beastly growl in the air.

***

"I told you so," said Ruvik, and Sebastian opened his eyes to a room full of ghosts.

He was standing at the back of the Cedar Hill church. He recognized it immediately, even though it was much more intact than what he remembered from STEM. The pews were meticulously positioned, each brimming with shadowy worshipers bathed in evening light. The pastor stood at the head, droning on in unintelligible nonsense. As Sebastian stepped down the line of half-formed specters, he noticed that some were much more distinct than others, their faces ranging from well-rendered to grotesquely smeared. Among them, seated halfway down the northern isle, was the four-member Victoriano family.

Sebastian glanced to each of them in turn, lingering the longest on young Ruben himself, no more than eight years old by the looks of it. His elder sister was holding his hand to keep him quiet. "Ruvik?"

Ruvik had finished providing hellish catalysts and was body-bound again, rushing with Joseph and Juli through Mobius' underbelly. Sebastian could see them in his mind's eye as if watching them on a security monitor. "I said to be careful," Ruvik scolded him from across the distance. "If you let her memories become integrated in the STEM, her influence will only grow stronger."

"I don't care." Sebastian hurried toward the altar and, as expected, he found a young, blonde girl in a black dress seated next to her mother in the front pew.

Sebastian had never seen pictures of Myra as a child. She'd told him they were all damaged and thrown away after her family home was flooded. According to her, Lily didn't resemble her at all, denying him even that comparison to draw from. He probably couldn't trust her own memory of herself, either, but seeing her so young, her wide eyes upturned and full of childish awe for the sermon, he felt something in him slip.

The pastor was ranting about the filth of the world, about order and balance and the only path that mattered. Sebastian passed through him, down below the altar where a cobbled stairway led into the church's stony bowels. He entered the musty tunnels and found Myra's young ghost there as well, holding the hand of a boy that looked to be her same age. They were being herded along with a procession of other families, past barred cells, past medieval laboratories, past tombs, into the deepest chamber where seven elderly men and women sat in audience of a stone table.

The center figure of their half circle was a woman with no face, and she beckoned young Myra forward, gave her a cup to drink from. Similar cups were passed among the gathered families, as if they were taking communion. He watched Myra gulp down her portion, and then she swayed on her feet, the vision of the room beginning to smear.

"More drugs," muttered Sebastian, and the chamber thudded in place of his heart. He felt the old woman's gnarled hand gripping Myra's tiny shoulder to keep her steady. "She can't be more than eight."

"Don't be distracted," Ruvik warned him yet again, voice popping like a poor radio signal. "You've known all along what these people are."

A far door opened, and two more ghosts in long cloaks appeared, dragging a man to the stone table. He was drugged, too, and didn't put up a fight as he was forced onto his back atop it for all to see. No one spoke as an executioner took to their stage, but Sebastian knew well enough what was happening. The man was a traitor. He had tried to leave. And through Myra's ears he heard the old woman hissing, "He's not your father. We are your only family. You stand with us." Myra looked on, swaying and unflinching, as the axe came down.

_They're not people,_ Sebastian though, his stomach rotting as he watched the scene play out again with other victims, with older Myra's. She watched each with the same empty-eyed face, eventually not even needing the drugs to calmly endure the slaughter. _They're monsters breeding more monsters._ The stone table became metal, the cloaks became lab coats. A generation of Mobius cruelty played out across STEM's canvas and he took it in. When Myra passed by him he touched her face, letting the contact blur the misty tendrils that formed them both. _If there was ever a Myra that could have been, there's no saving her now._

The floor began to rumble and then shake. The ghosts vanished, and in their place were left Mobius' present day fiends, corrupted past the point of humanity. Sebastian hated them. Every dead or undead rat left in the maze was part of the unholy beast responsible for his torment. He hated them for what they had done to his wife, so long before he could have known and so far beyond his repair. He hated the grief and guilt clawing through his lungs even as he watched her commit one atrocity after the next. Her histories flooded through him and forced him to witness the thousand times she had considered fighting back against her masters—to tell _him_ the truth—only to convince herself back into their fold through fear, and arrogance, and hope— _hope_ , for Christ's sake. Hope for a world of unyielding order, faith in a bleak future under Mobius' heel. How was he supposed to act in the face of such knowledge? How the fuck was he supposed to feel?

Sebastian didn't know, so instead he hated. Hate rippled out from him in violent orange and black, turning the already charred vermin around him into piles of ash. His agony flared out between the cracks in the church's stone floors and his frustration scorched the altars and pews. The smoke billowed out of the underground chambers and into the headquarters, consuming laboratories and guard stations, staining the atrium glass. The fire itself followed, swarming up through the indoor gardens and turning everything to smoldering dust.

***

Ruvik retreated from the onslaught. The heat licked at his skin and he was paralyzed. He could hear the rats wailing, their smoke-clogged voices threatening to overpower his every sense. He was so distracted trying to disentangle himself from Sebastian's wrath that he didn't notice the dead-eyed creature stretching its broken limbs toward him.

A few shots from Joseph's rifle dispelled the former janitor into great puffs of ash. "Ruvik?" He touched Ruvik's shoulder. "Are you—"

"I'm all right." Ruvik managed to mute his senses and shook Joseph off him. "But something's wrong." He hurried to catch up to Juli in the lead, just as she reached the fire door that would lead them back through the maintenance corridor. "Be ready," he told her.

Juli braced her weapon to her shoulder and let Ruvik open the door. As he expected, the room beyond was full of shambling ghouls, blackened and crumbling from Sebastian's fire, but it was their backdrop that concerned him more. Instead of the maintenance hall they were streaming down a stone corridor with fearsome figures carved into the walls, weathered by age and water. KCPD's finest made quick work of the beasts, but Ruvik felt Joseph hesitate over a pair them. It took only a moment for him to discern the reason, and it didn't surprise him: Joseph had shot them in the back earlier. They should have already been dead.

"We're under the church, aren't we?" Juli asked uneasily. "What is this doing here?"

"It's not just Sebastian affecting the STEM," Ruvik said as they continued on. "It's drawing from the memories of anyone it can't easily consume, just like in Beacon." He picked up his pace, forcing the others to do the same. "And now the building is on fire. We have to hurry."

Joseph stayed close at his side as Juli took to the lead again. "Sebastian's in trouble, isn't he?" he asked.

Ruvik tried not to grimace. "It's his wife. He's learning too much from her mind too quickly. He doesn't have enough experience with STEM to filter her out."

"Can't you tell him to stop? We can get to him on our own."

The thought of reaching out to Sebastian then made Ruvik's flesh prickle as if scabs were forming along it. "He'll be all right," he said. "He needs to finish this, and besides, he gave me a job to do." He raised his voice so Juli would hear. "Take the next stairs up."

Juli did so, hurrying her steps, and he wondered if she had sensed their quarry, too. They reached the upper level that ought to have been a hall of offices, but instead were met with a medieval cellblock, mindless drones bashing their heads up against rotting iron bars. And at the end of the long corridor, leaning against a pile of crumbling blocks as he tried to catch his breath, was the Administrator.

Ruvik flashed his teeth. "Adam."

Adam saw them and turned white. He was already ragged, black ash smearing his face and clothing, and immediately he started to run. But Joseph was quick on the trigger, and a spray of bullets carved up the side of Adam's left leg, felling him with a shout.

"You...!" Adam tried to draw his leg in and couldn't; three jagged holes had been shot clear through him and were already bleeding profusely. He pushed himself up as best he could as his attackers swarmed. "K-Kidman," he sputtered, jabbing his finger at her. "You will obey orders!"

"Yeah, I don't think so," Juli replied, her rifle trained on him.

Joseph got even closer, his barrel pointing directly at Adam's forehead. "I remember now," he said, quaking with anger. "Everything you put me through—what you made me do."

Adam glared warily back at him, but it was when his eyes met Ruvik's that real fear made him wilt. "How?" he asked. "The terminal isn't wireless. How did you do this?"

Ruvik stood over him, enjoying the shudder in Adam's broad shoulders. It reminded him of a dozen side glances cast in his direction when they first knew each other. "You've always been afraid of me," he said thoughtfully. "Haven't you?"

Adam didn't answer, but he didn't have to; it was written all over his sweaty face. Ruvik drank it in and hoped that Sebastian, whatever state he was in, could feel it, too. "Now, Adam," he said, taking a step back. He tugged Joseph and Juli's elbows, encouraging them to increase their distance from him. "You know very well you need to answer yes or no."

A trio of fleshy tentacles stretched down from a hole in the ceiling that hadn't been there a moment ago. They hooked under Adam's armpits and around his neck, heaving him into the air. He screamed as he was hauled into the darkness, his kicking legs throwing blood in all directions. Joseph lifted his gun, but Ruvik squeezed his arm before he could fire.

"You'll have a turn," he promised, and he led his KCPD partners through the connecting hallways. They could hear Adam's terrified voice as he was dragged through narrow passageways above them, until they found him again in a circular chamber lined with glass specimen tubes and medieval-looking instruments. But the main event was at the center: a rusted, grotesque version of the compliance chair that the Administrator favored so much. A writhing mass of sticky, boneless limbs had bound Adam to the chair, their barbs drawing blood from his wrists, ankles, and neck. When he struggled, they tightened, muscled strands peeling away to dig into his gunshot wounds. His pained cries echoed all through the walls; Ruvik wanted each of his loyal ants to know that their master was helpless in his grasp.

"If this is the only kind of honesty you understand," said Ruvik as he stood before the man, "so be it."

"You can kill me," Adam wheezed, "but—"

"We'll get to that," Ruvik interrupted, and the tentacles drew tighter, another pair snaking around his chest and waist. "But not before we get some answers out of you."

Another narrow appendage stripped away from the mass' body, tapering to a needle-like point. It stabbed into Adam's temple and he convulsed, teeth gnashing and eyes bulging. The theatrics weren't necessary but Ruvik enjoyed them nonetheless, as well as the mess of disgust and approval vibrating off their onlookers. "Now," he said. "This isn't the first time you've been connected to STEM."

"I can't," Adam babbled, tugging against his bindings again even though it only dug the barbs deeper into his skin. "Get this fucking—"

"We don't have time for this," said Joseph. "We need to get to Sebastian."

"We will," Ruvik assured him. "As soon as Adam answers my questions."

The needle-limb drilled deeper into Adam's skull, and with another sharp jerk his mouth fell open. "We were the first to connect...after the STEM was completed," he said haltingly. "I had to know. She had to know."

"Tatiana," said Juli, and Ruvik took a moment to pick through her mind, drawing out her memories of Tatiana from inside the STEM. "She denied ever being connected, but I _knew_ I saw her in there."

"Everything that connects to STEM leaves a piece behind," said Ruvik. "Even all of us now. In the beginning, when I first—" he grimaced "—became permanent, I was as much a captive as any of them. If Gutierrez was one of the first connected she must have hidden herself from me then." There would be time for her later, so he returned his attention to Adam himself. "But _you_. You couldn't hide from me, could you?"

"Stop," Adam wheezed. "Don't touch me...."

"This room we're in is from your memory, isn't it?" said Ruvik, and the insides of the tubes that lined the walls grew clouded, malformed hands pressing up against the glass. "Mobius has always resorted to crude means. Maybe you thought that with STEM, you wouldn't have to. You could just remake the world clean." The hands began to paw and pound. "But you haven't forgotten your past, it seems. I doubt they've forgotten you, either."

Adam's gaze leapt from one tube to the next, his breath heaving as some of them started to show cracks. "Don't—don't leave me here."

"We should just kill him," said Joseph, hands tight around his rifle.

Juli took a step forward. "Wait," she said, her voice taking on a different kind of intensity. "I have a question for him."

Ruvik learned her question and his answer in moments; he motioned for her to go ahead. "Be my guest."

"The village," she said with a great effort toward restraint. "My mom—my sister. They were all part of your church, right?" She took a deep breath. "What happened to them?"

Adam hesitated; the tentacle embedded in his head gave a twist that got him talking again. "D-Dead," he sputtered. "All dead. Sacrificed." He twitched and gagged. "It was what they wanted."

"You son of a—" Juli raised her gun and fired, four good shots carving into Adam's chest. He rocked and gurgled, eyes rolling back, but before the wounds could even begin to bleed properly, more tentacles plugged them up. They slithered beneath his skin and forced his torn heart to keep beating, pumped his diaphragm to draw air into his lungs. Adam coughed up blood but he was still alive, still helpless. When he seemed to realize the fate in store for him, he gave his chin a sharp jerk, letting his captor's barbs drag deep slashes through his throat. But only one bloody spurt escaped before the tendrils were there, creating bridging vessels to keep his circulation flowing.

"Kill me," Adam choked out, trying desperately to sever his wrists against the chair's arms, but the tentacles were there, too, gradually taking over his bodily functions where necessary. "Just kill me, you freak!"

"Oh, you'll soon be dead," Ruvik promised him. "Your human body, at least." He came closer and dug his fingernails into Adam's throat just so his gooey servant would have more damage to seize upon and repair. "But you're in the STEM now, Adam. As long as it still exists, so do you." He smirked. "Just like you always wanted."

"No." When Ruvik stepped back again, Adam resumed his fight, though he only succeeded in coercing more wriggling arms beneath his skin. "No! Kill me!" He tried to wrench free of the tendril lodged in his skull, but each tug only made his body spasm. Still, he tried, becoming less and less of a man as the creatures wailed and pounded all around him. " _Please_ , _kill me_!"

Joseph and Juli looked on in horror, and it took Ruvik's hands in theirs to pull them along. He was happy to lead the way.

***

Myra's only weapon was a shard of glass, and she cut her fingers open as she stabbed it into the creature's heart.

The hound bellowed and whined as it collapsed, though it still had enough strength that it struck her with one massive paw, throwing her into the chamber wall. The stone bruised her cheeks and jaw, scraped her skin raw. She didn't wait to see if her attack had finally killed the beast—she ran, bare feet aching on the uneven ground as she fled down a narrow corridor.

This was the STEM. She had devoted plenty of imagination toward it after the first stories crept out of Beacon, spurred on by the peculiar fear Adam held for it. But the reality was crueler than she'd expected. It wasn't just a nightmare world full of Hollywood creatures; the horde of cinder-men were all familiar faces, the hellscape plucked from her own miserable, half-fractured childhood. As she ran from the howling monstrosity it brought to life memories of hiding between church pews after the evening service, listening to the great guard dog crying to be fed in the caverns below, and hushing Adam when he begged her to seek it out with him.

_This isn't real,_ Myra told herself, but she couldn't stop running. _It's just illusions._ She could smell smoke flowing between the bricks and it set her basest instincts on edge. _It's just Sebastian getting you back for what he's been through. It's what you deserve._ She tried to wipe the sweat from her eyes as she flew. _But it's still just dreams and ghosts. You're still in the lab—you haven't actually gone anywhere!_

There was a gate at the end of the hall, and she ran for it. Only darkness lay beyond that reeked even more of flesh-turned-ash, but she threw herself against the bars anyway, smearing her blood on the rusty iron. _Is this really what it was like for Sebastian?_ she thought as she threw off the bolts and locks one by one. She freed the final hindrance and plowed through, into yet another underground laboratory.

It was the STEM chamber, charred and soiled, its instruments rotting as if it had sat for years unattended beneath the earth. But the core was still at the center, humming and pulsing like a living heart, its sludge-filled tubs gathered around in worship. The ashen remains of Anvi and the other techs and guards had been scattered across the floor. As Myra stepped forward, no idea what her next move ought to be, she spotted a familiar figure in a red sweater standing beside one of the tubs.

"Tatiana?" Myra limped forward, eyeing each corner of the room. She could feel her husband's eyes on them. "Are you all right?"

Tatiana glanced up only briefly and then went back to filling a syringe with pale yellow fluid. She was soaked from head to toe with bruises around her neck but otherwise she looked unharmed. "We don't have much time," she said. "He's gone beyond the boundaries, now."

Myra cradled her wounded fingers to her chest. "What does that mean?"

"This isn't just inside STEM anymore." She filled the rest of the syringe with a different solution. "This should counteract the sedation. He has to be stopped before he...."

She stopped, eyes growing wider. Myra felt him before she saw him. Sebastian formed out of the smoke, his outlines flickering and snapping wildly in orange hues. He didn't look human, or even that he ever had been, and she was overcome by the realization that he was looking at her the same way. It terrified her that she'd finally made him a good match for her.

"Before I _what_?" Sebastian asked, his voice rippling off the walls. "What are you afraid I'll do?"

Tatiana shoved the syringe into Myra's hands and then pushed her away, and just in time; Sebastian was on her in an instant. He grabbed her around the throat, and immediately his fire spread to her, searing off the top layer of her skin. "I don't have a scalpel," he growled as she writhed in his grip. "Sorry I can't be as precise as you were."

Boils rose and then burst all across Tatiana's skin, and her hair flaked away. Myra could only stare as Sebastian took his time peeling her apart—her blackened skin, her sizzling fat, her melting ligaments. Tatiana screamed for longer than seemed possible as her throat disintegrated. A woman Myra had known for years was broken down before her eyes, and all she could think was that her daughter had died the same way. Her beautiful Lily had shriveled up and been reduced to dust. Maybe she had been awake for it—maybe she had cried like that after all. By the time Tatiana stopped screaming her limbs had fallen away and she was so small under Sebastian's hands.

Myra leapt at him. The moment they touched his fire spread to her, too, but she kept pushing, using her elbows and what momentum she had to throw him off his feet. His knees clipped the edge of the tub and they both tumbled into it, cold, fetid water swallowing them up and dousing Sebastian's flames.

It didn't feel like the inside of the tub; the water seemed to go on endlessly in all directions, blissfully cold and black. For a moment they were floating, and Sebastian's body against hers was so familiar she could have cried. _I'm sorry_ , she thought, not knowing if he could hear her or if it mattered. _But it has to end this way._ She jabbed the syringe into his neck and hit the plunger.

Sebastian shook, and he grabbed at her shoulders, trying to throw her off. As she fought back she could suddenly feel the walls of the tub around them, knocking against their shoulders and knees. She shoved her hands past his, digging them into the back of his scalp. Her fingers found and wrapped around the tube embedded in his skull and she _pulled_.

***

The world fell away. The fire, the catacombs—even the black holes were snuffed out, their screams and their pain with them. It was like shutting off a television in a dark room, and Sebastian floundered, disoriented, in the emptiness. His body felt weightless and weighed down at the same time and he could barely string conscious thoughts together. And then it all came back. All the chaos he had wrought snapped back into focus just as swiftly as it vanished, and for a brief moment he could see it all from the outside. All of Mobius, scampering about like ants in a cheap plastic farm. Then Myra's hands snaked around his throat.

Sebastian's arms were heavy, but he got his hands beneath Myra and heaved with all his might, throwing her out of the tub. He dragged himself out next, coughing and sputtering as his body fought to regain its senses and functions. As he spilled out on the crumbling tile it took him a while to realize that Anvi's ashes were sticking to his wet skin. He grabbed the side of the tub to try and drag himself upright, but then Myra was there, kneeing him in the stomach.

The breath went out of him and he dropped. Again she went for his throat, her nails raking, and they tumbled across the floor as they struggled. She tried to stab him with the syringe and the needle broke off in his shoulder. With a growl Sebastian threw her off, and in his efforts to stand he spotted the remains of one of the guards nearby, his sidearm singed but intact. He lunged for it, grabbed it up with shaky hands and turned it on his wife.

Myra was leaning against the bathtub, out of breath but on her feet. She straightened up as she faced Sebastian down the barrel. Finally, there was life in her eyes, but they were wild with desperation and determination in equal measure. "Do it," she said.

Sebastian wrapped his finger around the trigger. He had to brace the grip with his other hand and even then he was still unsteady. He told himself to look past the blood and ash on her face, her sliced earlobe where her earring had been ripped out, the open wounds on her hands and arms. He tried not to imagine her as a young girl with a crone's gnarled hand on her shoulder.

_She did this_ , he thought, sweating through the bathwater. Blood was trickling down the back of his neck. _She could have made another choice. You saw that, in her memory. She made the choice._ He thought he might be sick but he fought it back, casting out all else but the plea in her face. _She wants you to do it._

Myra waited. Sebastian tightened his grip, but the moment he felt the trigger began to give, it sent panic all through him. He had already watched her get shot before, and even after all he'd seen and caused, he couldn't go through that again.

"I can't." Sebastian let his arm fall, and the gun clattered to the floor. He was just so tired. "You know I can't."

Myra's face went tight with pain. "Neither can I."

Sebastian knew what she meant, but he turned his back anyway. On weak knees he started toward the chamber's only exit. It wasn't that far; if only he could run, he would already be out. It filled him with relief to know that after so many struggles, it would all be over, so soon.

Myra's bare feet made only muted footsteps on the tile. He kept walking, listening to her step away from the tub, three steps forward to where he had just been. He heard the soft scrape of metal and the hammer being drawn back. Three shots hit him in the back.

Sebastian wavered, but he didn't fall, not immediately. The pain was incredible but it was blissfully far away, and he managed three more steps before his legs buckled. Landing on his knees rattled his shredded organs and he could taste blood in his throat. As he pressed his hands to the exit wounds, another shot rang out, followed seconds later by the sound of Myra's body dropping to the ground.

Sebastian didn't look back. He closed his eyes and curled over his chest, concentrating on each breath through shuddering lungs. Already his fingers and toes were beginning to go numb. "Ruvik," he wheezed. "I'm sorry, but...the rest is up to you."

***

Ruvik stumbled, and if not for Joseph at his elbow, he would have fallen. His torso was aflame with a burning agony, and when he looked down he saw blood oozing down his chest. "No," he whispered, and when he rubbed his shirt the vision of the blood vanished, but not the pain. His mind flew across the space between him and Sebastian, and instead of fire and rage he found only weary resignation. His body went cold. "No."

Joseph helped steady him. "What's the matter?"

Ruvik traced each blood vessel and nerve to ascertain the damage. "No," he said again once a clear picture had formed in his mind. _He can't survive that_ , he thought, heart and breath racing as panic threatened to shatter his concentration entirely. _He's already dead._

"You need to go to lab 4," he said breathlessly. "Find Gutierrez's serum. It's amber-colored, probably labeled with her name. Bring it to the STEM chamber as fast as you can."

"What's going on?" asked Juli. "What happened?"

"Just go!" Ruvik pushed away from Joseph and started to run. "I'll meet you there!"

The hallways were still made of stone, still full of crack-skinned wraiths. Ruvik flew past them, destroying all obstacles in his way. "Cas, we're coming," he said as he sprinted past the crumbling foundations of Mobius' past. "Apply pressure, stay still. We'll be there soon."

_Not soon enough_ , Sebastian replied. Even with the physical connection to STEM severed Ruvik could feel him so clearly, along with every ragged emotion. _I can hear your thoughts, remember?_

Ruvik shuddered. "Shut up. Shut up!" He scattered another group of former agents into less than dust and forced his legs to move faster. "Just stay still. I'm coming."

It wasn't fair. They had already won—Mobius was dead. Ruvik could have burst from rage and frustration but it was concern that gave him wings. With all his strength he raced through the remaining maze, back down into the building's underbelly, and finally, into the lab.

It was a scene fit for STEM. Ruvik forced himself not to look at the burned human remains and rushed to Sebastian, crumbled no more than fifteen feet from the door. He was hunched over in his hospital gown, his blood slick on the tiles and thick in the air, no color left in his face. But when he lifted his head and spotted Ruvik, he smiled through his grimace. It nearly took Ruvik apart.

"Ruvik," Sebastian wheezed. "How'd I do?"

Ruvik tugged his headphones down and rushed to his side. "You stupid...." His chest was drawn so tight he had nearly as much difficulty breathing as Sebastian. "You should have killed her," he said as he moved behind to check the entrance wounds. "You should have...."

Sebastian shook his head. "I wouldn't...have survived that, either," he said.

As much as Ruvik wanted to shake the rest of him, he understood. He swallowed down his bitterness and moved in front of Sebastian again, tugging at his hands. "Let me see."

"It's not like...." Sebastian coughed, spilling blood down his lips. "...last time. You can't patch me up from this."

"Shut up and let me see," Ruvik insisted stubbornly, but seeing the wounds only confirmed what he already knew: vital organs damaged, catastrophic internal bleeding. Even with their comrades racing through the facility, there wasn't enough time. Sebastian's heart was already struggling and he'd soon lose consciousness. It was over.

_It's over._ Ruvik clenched his fists against Sebastian's chest and felt a scream circling his throat. _No. No, it can't be over._

"I did my part," Sebastian croaked, leaning into his hands. "Get Joseph and Kidman out of here."

Ruvik shook his head. "No."

When Sebastian tried to reply, he couldn't, so instead he focused his thoughts and let Ruvik pull them from his mind. _Saving Joseph was the whole point. You promised to get him out. Stop worrying about me and just go_.

"No," Ruvik said again. "I'm not leaving you here—not like _this_ , with _them_. Don't you dare say you've given up after everything!"

But Sebastian was sagging, the strength flooding out of him. _Try to be good._ He turned his face against Ruvik's cheek. _Look after them for me? Please tell me you'll be okay._

Ruvik clenched his teeth until they ached. Sebastian's raspy breath was flecking blood on his face; it felt so hot against his skin he was sure it would steam off him. Every shiver through his failing body was exhaustion and acceptance and Ruvik hated him for it. It was cruelty itself, and denial made a madman of him.

He raised his gaze to the STEM, still humming with the loss of its master, and felt its eye on him. He knew what he had to do.

"Sebastian." Ruvik took his head in both hands and forced it up so their eyes could meet. "Do you want to die here?"

*

Sebastian stared back at him. Fatigue was carved into his every corner, and how could Ruvik blame him for that? Everything he had was spent; he had earned his rest. He couldn't even hope that his daughter waited where he was headed. Oblivion was the only respite left.

But then Ruvik reached down in the pit of him, reminding him of the strength that he so adored. He shouldn't have had any hope left, but something raw rose up in him anyway, and he spat the blood from his mouth. "No," he said, his eyes wet because he knew it didn't matter. But it was still the truth.

"Then put your arm around me," said Ruvik, already drawing it over his shoulders. "And stand up."

He grabbed Sebastian around the waist and pulled. Every movement made Sebastian quake and groan; the bullets had cut clear through him but he could have sworn he felt the edges of each wound grinding against each other. Even so, he put all the strength he had into his legs and pushed. With Ruvik's help, he managed to get to his feet. Even once they were there, Sebastian could support almost none of his own weight, depending entirely on Ruvik to carry him step by step.

Blood that wasn't his slicked the bottom of his feet. His stomach lurched, and it wasn't until Ruvik was bracing him against the side of the bathtub that he noticed he'd been pulled deeper into the chamber instead of out.

"What...?" Sebastian gripped the edge of the tub, realizing with a flash of horror that Ruvik was trying to push him back in. "What are you—"

"Get in the tub," Ruvik said, shoving at his back even though he _had_ to know that it was anguish.

"No," Sebastian choked out. His knees were giving out, but when he started to sink Ruvik only held ono tighter. "Not here."

Ruvik growled with frustration. "Get in the tub _now_ , Sebastian."

Sebastian didn't have the means to fight back, but he tried. "I don't want to die in—"

" _Get in the fucking tub_!"

Ruvik hooked his elbow under Sebastian's thigh and heaved, using strength he shouldn't have had to throw him over the edge. The water immediately turned crimson, and Sebastian floundered, gasping and pawing as the holes in his torso drowned in it. "Ru—" He thrashed, though weakly, as he fought to keep his head up. "I can't—"

Ruvik helped position him in the tub just enough to keep his nose and mouth out of the water and then disappeared, rummaging about the machine. Sebastian tried to reach for him but his mind was in freefall, and Ruvik's no clearer. All he gleaned were flashes of determination, and the anger they shared against what fate had handed them. _Ruvik!_

Ruvik returned. He was dragging a long wire behind him that seemed to connect back to the core. Without hesitation or explanation he climbed into the tub with Sebastian, his weight making the pressure worse. "I need you to trust me," he said, and to Sebastian's shock, he stabbed the needled wire into the back of his skull.

"Wha...." Sebastian's eyesight went dark. The cold water of the bathtub sank all through his pores, numbing his already useless limbs. But he could still sense Ruvik with him, fingers in his hair urging his head up. Then the STEM needle was back in place, and the world he'd created flooded through his senses in a vibrant assault. He felt himself shivering through Ruvik's hands and tried to reach for him. "I don't...want to die," he said. "Not in this fucking machine!"

"Sebastian, listen to me," Ruvik said firmly. He leaned down to put them forehead to forehead. "Death does not apply to us. Do you understand?" He stroked Sebastian's cheeks with his thumbs. "Trust me."

Trust. He should have laughed in his face. But Ruvik had been wrapped up in him from the start, was throbbing in his veins where his missing blood used to be, and it was fitting that it be the two of them at the end. He couldn't draw enough breath to speak but he nodded, and Ruvik kissed him, hard and deep and manic.

"Goodbye, Sebastian," he said, and then the STEM was upon them, everything blurring into blinding points of light.

***

Juli stopped when she heard the clack of the heels, grabbing Joseph's elbow to stop him as well. The sounds of the cinder-ghouls shrieking in agony had become like white noise but there was no mistaking the extra layer of monstrous wailing atop it, the gnashing of oversized teeth. She peered around the corner and wasn't surprised to see a long mouth atop slender legs devouring what had once been nurses.

"That's new," said Joseph, blinking at it.

"Not to me," Juli replied. "I sure hope she's on our side."

The spotlight swung around, and Juli winced back, but the creature didn't pay them any mind. " _Gutierrez_ ," the mouth uttered in unearthly tones, and then she turned, striding swiftly toward the lab.

Juli sighed with relief. "Come on," she urged, and they gave chase.

Shade burst into the lab, knocking the doors out of their harbors. The interior was closer to the Mobius Juli reminded, but its modern instruments were still rusted almost beyond recognition, blood and soot caked on every surface. A dozen former humans were sprawled about in various states of mutilation and decay, and at the center sat the chair, roughly dismantled. Joseph bristled at the sight of it, but there wasn't any time for contemplation; Shade's light had turned to blazing red and was swinging toward a row of medicine cabinets, where a still-breathing woman was digging through the supplies.

The woman lifted her head; the spotlight reflected in her cracked glasses. She was bloodied and singed but perfectly whole: Tatiana Gutierrez.

Shade bellowed, and immediately Tatiana bolted, a swing of her arm scattering the bottles she'd stacked on the table. While Joseph followed the fleeing doctor, Juli flung herself at the rolling bottles. Most were glass and one shattered against the floor before she could reach it. She banged her knees skidding into the shelves, but she managed to save the remaining medicines, cradling them in her arms as she carefully stood up. She could hear Joseph's rifle firing from the next room.

"Which one is it?" Juli muttered as she lined the bottles on the table. The lab was awash with dreary red, disguising the color of the fluids inside, the labels smudged with ash. "I can't fucking see—"

The light flicked from red to white, and then a spotlight focused in on the rows, narrowing until it only covered a single bottle on Juli's right. The liquid gleamed amber, and when Juli held it up, she could barely make out GTRRZ on the label. She glanced up and couldn't help but jump to find Shade right at her shoulder, but the creature was only interested in the bottle.

Juli gulped and then nodded. "Um, thanks."

Shade's light swerved away, and she moaned, " _Gutierrez"_ as she headed toward the far door. Joseph was on his way back through, and he lurched out of her way. His face was drawn with frustration as he returned to Juli's side.

"She blocked the next door," he said. "I couldn't follow her."

"We don't have time for her anyway." Juli shoved the bottle into her pocket along with a syringe from the shelf and then turned back. "We have to get to Sebastian."

"If Ruvik is asking for this, he must be hurt," said Joseph as they ran back the way they'd come. "Do you think—"

"Don't think," Juli interrupted. "Just keep running."

They sprinted as fast as they could toward the core.

***

When Sebastian regained consciousness, he was entirely numb. Only his ears seemed to work, and only well enough to deafen him with ringing and buzzing that shook down to his bones. It was hard to breathe and the tub water sloshing against his face didn't help. After several failed attempts, he latched onto the side of bathtub and dragged himself upright.

The lab swam dizzyingly around him, everything dark and indistinct as if he were still underwater. His skin was fuzzy and edgeless as if his entire body was made of cotton, and as he tried to probe for the wounds in his chest, his senses scrambled. He felt so small, and he shivered, fighting tooth and nail for coherency.

"Ru….." Sebastin coughed, wracking with the effort. He didn't know what the hell had happened, but he was alive, somehow. He slicked the water from his face and blinked rapidly, trying to clear his sore eyes. "Ruvik?"

He heard footsteps, and he turned toward them; a pair of figures was entering through the lab's open doorway. The glint of a dirty fluorescent against Joseph's glasses had him sagging in relief. "Joseph," he said, his voice thin and almost unrecognizable to him. "Thank God. Are you both okay?"

"What?" Joseph took a step into the room and then paused, his head tilted toward the floor. "Oh my God…."

Juli continued past him, but then she stopped, too. Sebastian couldn't see her face but it nauseated him to think that they both assumed he'd done it himself. "I tried," he said, half sick around the words. "But there wasn't…fuck, it was what she wanted. Maybe I should have done it myself, but…God, Myra...." He rubbed his face and tried to take in a full breath. "Are you both okay? Where's Ruvik?"

"Where's…what?" Joseph shook himself away from the sight of Myra's body and came closer. "What are you…."

He trailed off, growing as still and silent as Juli. As Sebastian's sight gradually came back into focus he was finally able to see the shock in their expressions. It gave him a chill. "What?" he asked, and his heart began to pound wildly. "What's the matter?" When he could see well enough to follow their eyes, he realized they were both looking past him, and he turned to see for himself. "What are you looking…."

Sebastian went rigid. Lying stretched out beneath him in the bloody bathtub was his own body: his brown eyes half open but lifeless, his thin lips parted but no breath through them, his skin cold and pale. Dead.

"What…." Sebastian looked down at his hands. They were small and thin, bruises on the knuckles from having been bitten and chewed. "No," he whispered, shaking as he reached up, pulling at the corn silk strands of his hair. He felt as if shards of ice were stabbing into him from all over. "No, what did you do?"

He lunged forward, grabbing fistfuls of the bloodied hospital gown. "What did you _do_?" he shouted, shaking the body, beating against its chest. "You stupid piece of shit! What have you done—what the _fuck_ _did you do?_ "

"Hey!" Joseph rushed do his side, capturing his flailing hands and drawing them back. Sebastian continued to holler and swear, but he didn't have any strength, and within moments Joseph had gathered him against his chest. "Stop," he said, his voice rough with emotion. "Stop, _please_ , calm down."

Sebastian didn't calm, but he did stop. He wound tight in Joseph's arms and watched, motionless, as Juli put her hand to his body's neck. Her face screwed up as if she was fighting back tears, and then they came anyway. She shook her head.

Joseph's breath went out of him; he had to devote one hand to the bathtub to keep his balance. It turned Sebastian's stomach, and he leaned over the edge and vomited bile. His nerves were twisting and sparking, static in his ears—he could still feel the bullet holes in his chest and he couldn't breathe, as if the air was rushing straight through him. "Fuck," he wheezed, and his stomach heaved again with nothing to offer. "Fuck, fuck!"

Joseph rubbed his back. "Se...." He shuddered and had to take a deep breath. "Sebastian? Is this...are you...?"

"...Yeah." Sebastian wiped his mouth and gagged all over again at the taste of blood. He watched Juli close the body's eyes and thought he might pass out. "It's me."

"Jesus Christ," said Juli. She and Joseph shared helpless looks, completely at a loss. Then all of a sudden she gathered herself; she wiped her eyes and checked her rifle for ammunition. "We have to go."

Joseph shook his head. "We can't just...." He cast another glance to Sebastian's body and grimaced. "Oh God, Seb. I'm...." He scrubbed his arm across his face and then drew his attention back to Sebastian himself. "Can you walk?"

_Walk?_ Sebastian thought. _Do I even exist?_ He couldn't take his eyes off his own dead face; he looked exhausted, denied peace even to the end. The sight burned itself into the inside of his skull. "No," he said.

"Then I'll carry you." Joseph turned around to offer his back, and when Sebastian didn't move, he dragged his arms around his shoulders himself. "Just hold on to me, okay? We're getting out."

He reached down into the tub, getting enough of a grip on Sebastian's sweatpants that he was able to drag him out. As they stumbled together, Sebastian felt the headphones slipping off the back of his neck. Instinctually he reached for them, and as he tried to sling them more securely, one of the speakers passing his ear issued a quiet whine.

Sebastian jolted. He finally put some effort into situating himself on Joseph's back so that he could devote one hand to fitting the transmitter on properly. He could hear the shrill feedback that had become as familiar to him as his own breath, and it put life back in his numb limbs.

_Ruvik?_ Sebastian squeezed his eyes shut and tried to concentrate on the noise, imagining it as a line drawn through the air that he could grasp. _Ruvik, you fucking asshole, please be there._

A light flickered across his eyelids, and when Sebastian opened them, he saw a glimpse of a tattered white robe and scarred flesh near the chamber exit. It was only an instant, blinking in and out in the dreary illumination of the lab, but suddenly Sebastian could breathe, and he tightened his arms around Joseph's neck.

"I'm ready," he whispered, and the three of them struck out into the facility.


	18. Chapter 18

The building was in a state of utter chaos. Joseph had hoped that with no one left connected directly to STEM, they would be free of its corrupting influence, but nothing had changed. The tiled floors of Mobius' labs were starkly juxtaposed with the weathered stone of the church's catacombs, joined only by their inhuman occupants. Crusted ghouls shambled through every corridor and black smoke seeped through every crack.

Juli stayed at the lead, keeping the way clear with a fresh rifle she'd plucked from a corpse. She didn't speak, focusing on cutting down any threat that crossed their path with efficiency. Joseph admired her courage. His own nerves were shot, and though his determination was a match for hers, he wasn't sure how far he could have made it on his own with two fractured ribs and Sebastian clinging to his back.

Joseph gulped and turned his head, but Sebastian's face was pressed to his neck and he couldn't tell if he was even still conscious. The soft hair against his cheek and skinny knees hooked over his arms had him whirling. To think that it was his partner, small and shivering against his shoulders, was more insane than the glimpse of The Keeper bludgeoning ash-men in lab coats to death in the next room.

Sebastian abruptly flinched, lifting his head enough peek forward with one bloodshot eye. "Turn left up here," he said.

"Kidman, left!" he called ahead, but it wasn't until they passed the turn that Joseph understood why the change in course; the right led to the atrium, a whirlwind of black smoke and roaring flames. As they hurried onward Joseph tried to catch a glimpse of Sebastian's face. "How did you know?"

Sebastian's arms tightened around his shoulders. "Ruvik's leading us."

Joseph grimaced, but then he saw it, too: as they reached the next turn, a flash of light in the rough shape of a white robe sparked in the doorway. He wouldn't have been able to make it out if it hadn't been so familiar. "What is he?" he asked. "What happened to him?"

"I don't know," Sebastian replied, and his voice was so hoarse that Joseph couldn't bring himself to ask anything else.

At last they reached the escalator. It wasn't running and Joseph winced in anticipation of what the steps would mean for his chest. Juli must have noticed, because she offered, "Do you need me to take him for a while?"

"No," Joseph said quickly. "I'm okay. I'd rather you stay on point."

Juli nodded, and as she started up, Joseph took a moment to catch his breath and heft Sebastian's weight; slight as it was, the pressure against his ribs had him seeing stars. "Sebastian," he asked carefully. "Are you still with me?"

"…Yeah."

Sebastian reached one hand down, pressing his palm flat against Joseph's chest. To Joseph's shock, the pain that had been throbbing all through his side since the fight with Lim was suddenly dulled to barely a murmur. Feeling significantly lighter, he started up the escalator. "How did you do that?"

"I don't know," said Sebastian. "Ruvik used to do it for me, so I thought…."

He trailed off, and Joseph didn't press him. As he climbed the steps behind Juli, he thought back over all the bizarre circumstances of the last several days, remembering the protective glare in Ruvik's eyes as they faced each other in the alley, Sebastian's fierce defense of him in the apartment and again later in captivity. He remembered a kiss between two ghosts in the darkness of the lab below. He couldn't make sense of it.

"Hey, Seb," he said, even knowing it wasn't the right time or place. "What happened between you two?"

Sebastian shivered. "It's…complicated," he said helplessly, and Joseph didn't blame him, but then he grew tense again. "Wait. Something's up there."

Joseph lifted his head. Juli was nearly at the top, and as she got a glimpse of the hall beyond she immediately stopped and took a few steps back. Joseph's hair stood on end as he hurried to join her. "What's the matter?"

"The hall is blocked," said Juli, wiping sweat from her face. "But there's no other way around that doesn't take us through the atrium."

She leaned against the rail so Joseph could pass her and see for himself. As he scaled the last few steps his stomach rose up against his throat; he could hear the ghouls moaning and crackling, more than they'd had to face before. The sight of it was worse: dozens of the creatures were hunched together in the corridor, droning on unintelligibly as they swayed back and forth. They hadn't been there on the trip down—they had to have been lying in wait to gather so many so quickly.

"If they're all grouped together, maybe we can take them," said Joseph. "They don't take that many shots each, so between the two of us—"

"Let me down," Sebastian said urgently, already trying to wriggle free. "There's something else in there."

Joseph stepped off the escalator and then crouched so he could lower him onto more even ground. He stayed close, offering his arm so that Sebastian could steady himself. As Juli joined them on the landing, the horde of ghouls began to mutter and fidget in restless agitation. It turned Joseph's stomach and he braced the rifle stock to his shoulder.

"What is it?" he asked, hair rising when he saw a pair of arms stretch out of the fray. "One of Ruvik's monsters?"

"No," said Sebastian, glaring with renewed intensity into the throngs. "One of mine."

The reaching hands each took hold of a ghoul's shoulder, using them to push their full figure upright. It was a man with long limbs, singed black and stained crimson, his movements the twitching, unnatural angles of a poorly controlled marionette. His eyes glowed green in the dark of the tunnel, and when his head lolled to the side, they could see the gaping, ragged hole where the back of his skull used to be.

Joseph flinched. "Agent Lim…?"

"How the hell is he still alive?" muttered Juli.

"He's not," said Sebastian. "His body is dead. But he must have survived long enough to get sucked into the STEM." His fists quivered at his side. "He's just a ghost, now."

" _Castellanos_ ," crowed Lim. His left elbow buckled and he sagged, struggling to stay upright. "Did you really think I would let you leave, after—"

Juli opened fire. She caught him full in the face, tearing off his right cheek, but then the surrounding ghouls jolted upright to block the rest of her bullets. All at once the not-quite-human shield rushed toward them, and even with Joseph shooting as well and ghouls falling underfoot, there were too many for their ranks to be thinned. Just as Joseph was considering a retreat down the escalator to narrow the field, the onslaught suddenly parted, and Lim shot out of the horde, striking Sebastian in the chest with his palm.

Sebastian fell over backwards. He made a grab for the escalator's handrail, but he only caught one side; he spun and then tumbled down the stairs. Joseph didn't have time to even call after him, because then Lim was there, grabbing him by his elbows while Juli continued shooting into the mass of bodies. He fought back, but his heels were already slipping off the top step, and Lim had an army of ghouls to brace him.

"I knew you'd be trouble," Lim rasped. His eyes were staring in different directions and sizeable portions of his skull were missing, but it didn't seem to bother him in the least. "I should have killed you the moment they brought you in."

"Your mistake," Joseph spat, but a dozen hands were trying to yank his gun from him, and it was hard enough keeping his grip let alone trying to aim a decent shot. "Give it up—you're already dead!"

"Takes one to know one," said Lim, and his sternum shifted with an audible _crack_ that was nauseating. His throat bugled as if something were crawling up it, his jaw jutted forward—Joseph could even see a glimpse of raw muscle squirming past the hole Juli's rifle had carved out of his face. Five skinned fingers reached out of the hole in the back of his head and wriggled in the air.

Juli kicked the closest of the ghouls away from her and swung the rifle barrel around. "Just fucking die!" she hollered as she pulled the trigger, and another three bullets made craters out of Lim's temples, one bursting his right eye. But he barely flinched, and before she could do any more damage, the hand lurched out from his skull to wrap around her face. In her panic to try and pry it off, the mass of brainless zombies resumed their attack, ripping her gun away from her.

"Don't worry, Kidman," said Lim, but his voice wasn't coming from his mouth any longer, clogged as it was with a bloody elbow. "You can still be on my team."

The hand sucked back like a tongue being drawn into a mouth, dragging Juli up against Lim's back. She kicked and clawed, her screams muffled against his slimy, skinless palm, but he didn't react to even her nails digging into the mangle of flesh his face had become. Joseph finally got his gun angled despite his captive arms, but shooting Lim through the stomach didn't seem to have any effect on him, either. He still towered over them, his remaining eye swiveling blindly back and forth.

"I guess you can join us, too," said Lim, his voice thick with blood. "Since you've already survived this long." It took Joseph a moment to realize that his stained shirtfront moved when he talked. "Be grateful."

He twisted, and Joseph tried to plant his feet, but Lim was still so much stronger. The horde got their hands on him. Joseph shoved and fought, clinging to his gun as sweltering fingers pressed burns into his exposed chest. "Get off!" he shouted, shooting the closest of the creatures through the head. Its skull crumbled into ash, and so did several afterwards, but there was so many and they seemed to just keep coming. "Get off me! Kidman!" When he tried to turn, thinking maybe he could at least shoot enough of Lim that there wasn't anything left to hold her with, he couldn't see through the sudden crowd of pushing, grabbing bodies. One after another he shot them dead, but they were all around him, crying and smothering.

"Sebastian!" Joseph called out, but then one of the creatures struck him in the back of his knees, and he fell to the ground.

***

Sebastian clawed at the sides of the escalator, but he couldn't get himself upright. His limbs were still mostly numb, skinny and short like twigs, and he feared that moving too much would break him apart. The fall had his head spinning and his back aching. Even though he could hear fighting and gunshots above, his eyes refused to focus and his stomach was threatening to empty what it didn't have. He was just as helpless as when Ruvik's drugs were poisoning him. Then he realized he wasn't wearing the headphones.

"Shit," Sebastian hissed, and he twisted, trying to peer through watering eyes at the steps below him. "Shit!" He felt around with hands and feet, and his heart skipped when his heel knocked something further down. Desperately he gave chase, scraping his hands on hard edges until he'd managed to grab the transmitter up.

"Ruvik?" He fit the headphones to his ears, pressing them in hard against his head. "For fuck's sake, where are you?"

Sebastian felt a hand on his shoulder. He couldn't see anything, but the imprints of scarred flesh burned into his own. "Sebastian," said Ruvik, his voice crackling in Sebastian's ears like white noise. "You need to calm down and focus, or I can't—"

Something thumped on the steps above, and Sebastian startled, raising his head. Lim was heading toward him, Juli stuck to the back of his head like a leech. Her arms were slack and she stumbled on the escalator in her heels. Blood flowed thick and dark from the many holes ripped through Lim's head and arms, and watching it stain Juli's hair and shirt made Sebastian ill. With a growl he forced his quivering knees and elbows to get him to his feet.

"Castellanos," said Lim, and Sebastian could see teeth moving against his shirt front. "Did you really think I'd let you leave, after what you've done?"

Sebastian clung to the handrail as he faced Lim down. "Let her go, asshole."

"She's mine," Lim snapped. "She asked for me." He came to a rickety halt, Kidman swaying mindlessly into his back. "And she's better off, considering you've _killed_ everyone else that mattered to you."

"You son of a—" Sebastian lunged, but Lim had every possible advantage, and all it took was a swift kick to send him tumbling further down the escalator. It was surreal, feeling bruises jabbed into a body that didn't belong to him. He could barely control his limbs enough to try to stop. Then he felt the hand again. Firm arms wrapped around his shoulders and saved him from a harsh landing on his head. His heart pounded anew and he reached back, desperate to find Ruvik there. "Ruvik—"

"Why the hell are you to trying to punch him?" Ruvik said angrily as he dragged Sebastian back to his feet. "Did you forget everything we just did? He's _nothing_ to you."

Sebastian wobbled dizzily as he was forced upright again. He could barely breathe or see, let alone remember what it meant to be limitless. "God damn it, Ruvik," he wheezed, "can't you just—"

Lim pounced, leaping easily down the stairs and grabbing Sebastian around the neck with both hands. Sebastian fought back, gagging and choking as Lim's noxious blood clung to his skin, but he didn't have any strength and he could no longer feel Ruvik at his back. He was lifted into the air, and though he managed to get one foot on the handrail, it wasn't enough of a relief for his captured throat and he couldn't draw breath.

"Myra was never yours," Lim snarled as Sebastian clawed helplessly at his wrists. "You didn't love her—you didn't even _know_ her. You took her from _me_!"

He heaved Sebastian up onto the partition, shoving his back into the metal. Sebastian tried to get his feet between them, even if he knew better than to think he'd have any luck freeing himself that way. His ears were throbbing with the pressure of his own pulse, with Lim's cursing and a distant roar of fire. He was exhausted and sick and he couldn't tell Lim he was wrong. But he still fought. He shoved his knees up against Lim's chest and pushed with what little strength he had.

Something _snapped_ beneath Lim's shirt. Sebastian's sight was starting to go, but when he looked down he could see the fabric ripping away, and a broad, gooey hand just like the one reaching out of his head emerged. It grabbed at Sebastian's knees and pride them open so he could lean closer, the press of his larger body taking away Sebastian's last defense. He was pinned and helpless.

"Her and Lily both," said Lim, the gleam of one eye and flashing teeth poking out of his torn chest. Seeing his daughter's name formed in those rotting lips refilled Sebastian's vile hatred to overflowing. "Do you think I enjoyed killing her, when it should have been you?" he carried on, Sebastian roiling with every word. "It was only because Myra made me promise. I should have taken them home—they should have been mine!"

A scream tore out of Sebastian with such force it shook the hands off his throat. He thought of Lim's hand on his daughter's back and suddenly he remembered rage. He could feel each muscle, tendon, and bone that made up Lim's long arms and his wrath took them apart, stripping and tearing, grinding and spewing. His hate splintered like shotgun pellets and Lim was thrown back, howling and thrashing as both arms disintegrated into blood all the way up to his shoulders.

Sebastian slumped back onto the escalator steps, grasping for breath and balance. Familiar hands took his shoulders to steady him, and he struggled to regain his composure as quickly as possible. "Ruvik?"

"It's about time," Ruvik scolded.

He braced Sebastian against the handrail and motioned for him to look at his handiwork. Lim had retreated upward, groaning and quaking. The ruddy arm sticking out of his chest, unaffected by Sebastian's attack, sucked back into his torso. The first even let go of Juli, and though he wasn't entirely stable, Sebastian leapt for her. She collapsed into his arms and he had to fight to keep from tumbling down the stairs.

"You _fuck_ ," Lim hissed, and then with a nauseating squelch, the flayed arms burst out of his severed shoulders to replace the limbs he'd lost. With a shout like a beast he fled up to the landing.

Ruvik gave chase. Sebastian watched his white robe disappear into the throngs of ghouls, filling the hall with their ghastly cries and death groans. Seconds later he emerged again, a battered and coal-stained Joseph in tow. Baffled but relieved, Sebastian turned his attention to Juli.

"Kidman?" She was still crumpled in his arms. He wiped the blood from her face the best he could and then gave her cheek a slap. "Juli!"

Juli took in a huge breath and then immediately expelled it, coughing and hacking. "Kill him!" she gasped out, reaching for a gun that wasn't there. "Fucking kill—"

"It's okay," Sebastian tried to reassure her. "Calm down—you're okay." He helped her to sit up, but once she managed to catch her breath, he was the one that needed help standing up. " _Are_ you okay?"

"Shit, I think so." Juli grimaced as she made her own attempt to get Lim's blood off her, grimacing all the while. "Where is he?"

They climbed the stairs to where Joseph and Ruvik were waiting: Joseph sitting on the steps, his arm around his midsection but seemingly all right; Ruvik on his feet, facing the hallway beyond. Sebastian held his breath as he reached out and wound the back of Ruvik's robe in his fist. The fabric was cold and stiff, but it felt real between his fingers, and when he leaned closer, he could make out every ridge and valley in Ruvik's exposed scars. He knew it was only a phantom tricking his senses but it might as well have been the real Ruvik—a Ruvik he had never met—turning to look at him.

"Don't worry," said Ruvik, and when he offered his hand, Sebastian eagerly took it. "I'm still here."

"What did you—" Sebastian started to ask, but Ruvik tugged him up on the top step with him and shook his head.

"You need to handle this first," he said.

Sebastian looked. Lim and his horde had retreated back into the corridor, where he stood at their center, shredded and grotesque. The ghouls swarmed around him like bees, and as the group watched, those closest began to shove themselves between the fibers of his exposed muscles. Their bodies deflated and stretched, crawling up between the sinews so that they bulged with the added mass. He was absorbing them, and within moments he had grown so much that the rest of his human skin and clothing split apart and fell away like the cheap shell it was.

"Jesus Christ," muttered Juli, her hand over her mouth. "What is he?"

"He's becoming Amalgam," said Ruvik as their adversary bloated to fill the hall. Even then his face was only barely visible, poking out through the spaces between flexing ribs, bloodshot eyes peering back at them with hate. "All the Mobius vermin we've exterminated are flocking to him as the final authority left—their raw data is fueling him. Their fear and his hate have made a fine monster for us."

Joseph dragged himself to his feet with Juli's help. "How do we stop him?"

Ruvik snorted. "'We' don't do anything. It's in Sebastian's hands."

Sebastian's hand clenched around his involuntarily. He stared up at the hulking beast Lim had become: raw muscles stretched over a writhing torso, limbs long and bending with too many joints, a cavern between jutting clavicles where his neck ought to have been. Blood and pus oozed from between every crevice, and when Lim opened his mouth, the exposed bone of his jaw shoved his internal organs out of the way, displaying teeth like machetes in the hollow below his sternum. Watching the flesh squirm made Sebastian's own insides crawl, as if he could feel them parting from the skull lodged in his own chest. But instead of succumbing to nausea he filled his belly with hate, fierce and almost delirious with anticipation of watching the thing die.

"What do I have to do?" he asked.

"Whatever you like," replied Ruvik. He slipped out of Sebastian's hand so he could instead take his shoulder, turning to meet him face to face. It was strange and somehow daunting to have to look _up_ into his eyes. "Think about it, Sebastian. The STEM here isn't wireless, and you're not connected to it anymore—this is all _you_." He squeezed Sebastian's collar with urgent excitement. "This is _us_ , our power. Nothing can stop you, let alone this filth. You are _God_ to them."

He urged Sebastian forward; Sebastian took a step, then two, forcing himself not to pause when Ruvik's hand fell from his shoulder. It was the truth, after all; when Sebastian allowed himself to think and feel past the fuzzy, unfamiliar outlines of his own body, he had no trouble seeing Lim and the masses he'd gorged himself on for the microbes they were. There was nothing recognizably human in what they'd left behind, only as a mash of agonies and terrors, sins and regrets. Even Lim himself was nothing more than a twisted memory. His reality stretched only as far as Sebastian's own will.

"Go ahead," Lim taunted, leaning forward against the first of his many elbows. The skull hiding behind his ribs twisted and turned to get a better look at him. "Be my God, and I'll be your Devil. Then I can make you suffer as long as you exist."

He reached forward, his hand stretching with slick, crooked fingers. Sebastian held his ground. "No," he said, and when they were close enough to touch he reached out, too, digging his nails into the inside of the closest joint. "I'm done with you."

Sebastian shoved his fingers between the exposed tendons, into the congealed tar of Mobius fodder that Lim was feeding on. Ruvik was right. Decimated as they had been by the initial assault on the headquarters, there were no individuals to be found—only the faint echoes of the Administrator's voice kept them bound to each other and to Sebastian himself, too pathetic even to be pitied. They were far more ready to face oblivion than he had been, and even though it may have counted as more mercy than they deserved, he gave it to them.

Lim closed Sebastian up in his fist, but by then the ashes in his veins were already heating. Each unworthy cell popped and boiled, turning his blood molten. It oozed through every fleshy boundary, scalding him from the inside. Like any fire it swept through him with terrifying swiftness, consuming every vessel and organ.

"I didn't kill my daughter," said Sebastian as Lim recoiled, howling and writhing. His throat closed around the words but he forced them through. "I didn't kill my wife, either. You did." He shuddered, overwhelmed and unblinking as he watched the beast clawing at its own melting carcass. Strips of meat cooked off the bone and blood simmered as it spurted against the walls. "All of you. And you're going to hell for it."

"You can't kill me!" Lim screamed, even as his musculature blackened into a husk, shrinking and disfiguring him. "You can't kill me!" His fingers broiled away, then his palms, his wrists, and every twisted elbow down to his shoulders. His legs shriveled and curled into snakeskin. Still he hollered and cursed, until every speck in his horde had been scattered and there was nothing left but a cracking, blistered rib cage and a red-stained skull glaring out of it.

"You can't kill—" he started to say, but when Sebastian lifted his hand the .45 was cocked in his grip, and he unloaded the full clip until all that was left was shards of bone.

Sebastian let go of the gun. He didn't hear it hit the floor, his senses were far away and smearing beneath the suddenly choking stench of smoke and ash. He felt as if he'd carved weights off his own body and it was adrift, the world he'd crafted dissipating around him. His knees wobbled, but before he could even start to collapse Joseph was there, pulling his arm over his shoulders.

"I've got you," said Joseph, and with Juli leading the way again, they stumbled past Lim's remains and headed for a side door further down the corridor. "You got him, Seb. We can get the hell out of here now."

"Where's Ruvik?" Sebastian asked blearily, but the words weren't even fully out of him when he felt a rough hand skating along the back of his.

"I'm still here," Ruvik assured him. "Keep going. There's just one more thing I have to take care of."

"What?" Sebastian twisted against Joseph's support, trying to see him, but then Juli was touching his face. When she tried to take his headphones off he startled and pushed her back. "The hell are you doing?"

"Just for a moment," she said, and he finally realized that she was offering him a gas mask from a nearby supply closet. "The smoke is getting worse—we need these."

Sebastian allowed her to help him into the mask and then quickly drew the transmitter back into place. He couldn't feel Ruvik at his side anymore, but his ears were ringing, and that was good enough for the time being. Once Joseph and Juli had masked up as well, they hurried on together toward the last hallways that would lead them out.

***

Ruvik only waited long enough to make sure that Sebastian had some momentum before venturing outward. He knew very well how frail the tether between the mental and physical could be, and Leslie's body had already endured so much he feared testing the limits too quickly or too far. But Sebastian was on his feet, was moving, had purpose again. As far as Ruvik was concerned, humanity had no greater strength to offer.

So he spread his senses out. Most of the building was falling into shadow; the bulk of Mobius' rats had been extinguished with Lim, and those that remained were rotting away or already far gone, preventing Ruvik from seeing through their eyes. He didn't need them to feel the heat of the fire spreading ever more rapidly through the facility and he kept his distance. Soon the entire headquarters would be nothing but a burnt out shell with barely ashes to mark the graves.

But there was one human soul left among the wretches, or at least, one sane enough to pretend. He followed the shaded outlines and found the last of the black holes in an office on the second floor. A pair of legs in a bloody sheet was crumpled against the wall, and Tatiana had the heavy iron spotlight in her hands, using it to break through an exterior window. Though she had certainly seen better days, she was relatively unharmed despite the hell she'd fought through and her mind was as closed to him as ever.

"Gutierrez," said Ruvik, and she went still. "I knew you would be the last."

Tatiana dropped the spotlight and turned to face him. "You can't hurt me, Ruben," she said confidently. "There's not enough of a soul in me for you to exploit."

"If that were true," he replied, "you wouldn't be able to see me at all." But he allowed her to see him; he _wanted_ her to see him, just as any of the others inside STEM had before he brought them doom. Her memories may have been locked to him, but her surface was ripe for the taking, now that he had Sebastian's power to draw from. He took a step forward. "I can do anything I want to you, 'doctor'. Where shall we begin?"

Tatiana didn't falter; she even stood taller, determined not to shrink before him. "It's a shame," she said. "We could have created such remarkable things together."

Ruvik seethed with the memory of blades in his flesh. "You should have considered that before you gutted me."

"Only because you betrayed us first."

Ruvik moved closer. "I was protecting what was mine."

"So was I." Tatiana took off her glasses to clean with her lab coat. "Do you know what our emblem stands for?"

"Go ahead and tell me," said Ruvik. "Make it your last words."

Tatiana replaced her glasses, but just as she opened her mouth to speak, he sliced a line down her chest. He didn't need to trick her with visions of him rushing toward her with a scalpel; just opened the flesh along her sternum in a familiar Y incision. Her eyes widened and she gasped, clutching her arm across the wound, but it didn't stop her. "It represents the strength of our will," she said. "Our willingness to strike at the core of humanity."

Ruvik stepped closer, cutting her open along her shoulders and thighs, elbows and knees, as if readying to take her apart piece by piece. She hissed with pain and retreated, her blood flowing, but still she glared back at him. "Sacrifices have to be made for the greater good," she continued defiantly, even as Ruvik opening her ankles made her stumble. "You understood that once. There will never be real change until _we_ take root, take control. Only Mobius has the strength to—"

"You don't know what strength is," Ruvik interrupted, carving up her throat into her face. "You're all nothing but cowards."

Tatiana's hands went to her face, but it wasn't until he burst one of her eyes that she cried out. But she still had some wits about her. She snatched up Shade's spotlight again and swung, heaving it through the window she had already cracked. The glass shattered and she let her momentum carry her through the jagged opening. The shards drew more of her blood but she didn't stop, leaping from the building. Through her Ruvik felt the rush of the fall, even heard the blare of sirens drawing closer. Finally he caught a taste of her fear, just before she hit the ground.

Her senses went dark. Ruvik strained, hoping to confirm she'd landed badly enough to break her spine or crack her skull open, but her mind, be it dead or merely unconscious, was still a black hole to him. There was no way to know.

 _It's all right_ , said Sebastian, and Ruvik was relieved to know he had been with him all along. _Forget about her. Just come back_.

Ruvik was reluctant, but there wasn't any more he could do. He let himself be drawn back into the folds of Sebastian's mind.

***

They reached the building entrance. The glass doors were black with char, and beyond them, the world swirled with Hellish red and orange hues. Sebastian felt a chill as he approached, overcome with the sensation that his judgment awaited. But Joseph and Juli were still at his back, depending on him, and when he put his hand to the doors the inferno fell away. He pushed, releasing them into fresh air and a summer sunset. As they emerged, fire trucks and police cars began to pour into the courtyard with lights and sirens blazing. The déjà vu made Sebastian ill.

"Is this the right time to get our stories straight?" Juli asked as the three of them put the building behind them.

"Don't stop," said Sebastian, striding determinedly down the front stairs. "Don't talk, don't look at them. Just follow me."

Joseph and Juli fell into step behind him. A police car stopped in front of them and Detective Phi bounded from the passenger seat, but it hardly took any effort to divert his eyes. The firemen and reporters hurried about, setting up and already speculating, but none of them paid the trio any mind. Sebastian kept it that way as they moved beyond the driveway, up a sloping embankment toward the interstate. Only once they'd reached the top of the hill, a safe distance from the commotion, did Sebastian pushed the transmitter off his ears and toss the gas mask to the ground. Though a large part of him didn't want to, he turned back to look.

The entire Mobius complex was up in flames. It roared and heaved in the dying light, so brilliant that it bled into the setting sun, as if the horizon itself were ablaze. Dark smoke spewed from every window and turned every breath of wind foul. No effort of the emergency crews seemed to do anything to halt its gradual consumption of the building. Sebastian was transfixed by the sight. He stared until the light burned his eyes and his sinuses were full of soot.

Joseph and Juli shed their gas masks alongside him, but for the moment, he barely noticed them. He licked his lips and tasted ash. "Ruvik?"

"I'm here."

A scarred hand slipped into his. Sebastian twisted their fingers together and squeezed tight, clinging to him as they faced the horrifying scene. He saw the cult's twisted headquarters burning to cinders as a suburban family home, as a barn amidst a field of flowers. The wailing of sirens blended into the tortured screams of a dying young girl. Their enemies disintegrated into dust amidst a daughter, a sister, among Myra and Leslie and the rest of their monsters, among Ruvik's organs and Sebastian's corpse and the STEM itself—laying every last shred of them to rest in that singular memory that had bound the two of them together from the start.

They stayed and watched, hand in hand, as it all burned into the night.

***

Sebastian didn't remember passing out, but when he came to, he was stretched out in a bed. The lumpy mattress felt familiar beneath his weary back, but it wasn't until he felt a twinge in his leg that he put the scene together: he was in Martin's apartment. His body was sturdy and whole again, all rough edges and whiskers. It didn't fool him for an instant. Still, he didn't move for a while, allowing himself to remember the tempo of his breath.

Fingers eased through his hair, finally prompting him to open his eyes. He looked up and found Ruvik beside him, watching from beneath his hood. Only a week ago he would have found waking up to those pale eyes on him to be cause for panic, but now it fill him with mourning.

"I guess I'm dreaming?" he said.

"Something like it." Ruvik shifted back so Sebastian could sit up, leaning into the headboard. "You should be used to it by now."

Sebastian shot him a look, but Ruvik's dry delivery, so familiar and from his real voice, turned him upside down and he wilted. "For real this time," he said. "What did you do?"

"The only thing I could," Ruvik replied. "I transferred your data to Leslie, just like I did for myself the first time. All your memories, your thought processes—everything that makes you _you_."

Sebastian looked down at his hands. His eyes were drawn to his naked ring finger, and the tan line that stood out like a scar. When he made a fist he could feel Leslie's smaller hand beneath his skin, and it made him shudder to think that when he woke up, any marks on his body wouldn't be his.

"What about you?" he asked, stretching and then curling his fingers, drawn in by the bizarre sensation.

"I haven't gone anywhere," Ruvik assured him. "I've merely...taken a step back."

Sebastian raised his head; he didn't need to watch to sense Ruvik's tense uncertainty. Surely Ruvik could sense just as much from him. "So you're my Leslie now."

"No," said Ruvik, but then he hesitated before elaborating. "Not precisely. When taking over this body the first time, I made an effort to erase as much of Leslie as possible, and I more or less succeeded. But all of me is still here."

He was still holding back. "Only?" Sebastian prompted.

Ruvik's brow furrowed, but he hadn't been much of a liar even when there might have been a point. "Only, you don't have the experience I do of living this way. I did what I could to make sure your connection to this physical body was stronger than mine, so you would have it as an anchor." He paused again, sinking deeper into his hood. "But I only exist inside of you, now. As time goes on, the line between us may blur. Your memories and perceptions of me could become stronger than what I am. They could change me."

Sebastian gulped. "I can't imagine you liking that idea."

Ruvik met his gaze and replied, "It terrifies me."

The words struck a similar feeling through Sebastian. "Then switch us," he said before he could even think about what that meant. "Just take it back. I don't want this body anyway."

Whatever uncertainty there had been in Ruvik's face swiftly hardened. "No."

"I didn't want this!" Sebastian insisted. "Ruvik, she—" His throat closed around the truth, and he could have smacked himself for how foolish that was, when he was already only a ghost in his own mind. "She killed me. I didn't ask you to sacrifice yourself for me. I was ready for—"

"No you weren't—you can't lie to me," Ruvik snapped, and Sebastian flinched, ashamed that he was right. "And we can't switch, either." He forced himself to straighten up and face Sebastian fully. "I may or may not be able to survive inside of you, but you would never survive inside of me. I'd just make a monster out of you, like Leslie, and...Laura. I don't want to know what I'd make you into."

"Ruvik...." Sebastian ached, and he sighed, trying to expel the weight from his chest. "So what do we do now?"

Ruvik relaxed a bit, and in doing so looked more like himself. "Anything you want," he said as if it were easy. "You have all my abilities, my knowledge. You saw what we were able to do with that one transmitter—with time we could build a stronger one. You can have and do anything you want."

He took Sebastian's hand, and the slow squeeze of those rough fingers helped him feel clearer. "But don't think you'll be rid of me that easily," he said. He even smirked a little. "I've been quite at home inside your mind for a long time now."

That managed to coax a dry smile from Sebastian. "That's not funny."

"Besides, I've been lucky before. Perhaps a compatible body will cross our path."

Sebastian thought he should have found the idea revolting, but instead it felt like hope. "I guess I'll keep my eyes peeled," he said. "Any special requests?"

He meant it as a joke, but Ruvik grew serious again, watching him with an almost desperate sincerity. "Don't change me," he said.

His fear resonated so deeply, but for some reason it, too, filled Sebastian with possibly unwarranted hope. After everything they had endured and survived, it was a relief to be able to reassure Ruvik of at least one thing. "I couldn't even when I wanted to, remember?" he said, and he reached out, drawing his thumb along Ruvik's cheek. "You don't have to worry about that, Ruvik." His smile deepened until it hurt. "I know you."

Ruvik remained still for a long moment, watching and gauging, his attention drawn tight on the words. Then something in him crumbled, and with a deep sigh he turned his face against Sebastian's palm. When Sebastian welcomed him closer he eagerly complied, and they wrapped each other up as they sank to the mattress together.

 _Well, you were right_ , Sebastian thought, holding Ruvik tighter and tighter until they melted straight through each other. _He's with you, and you're with him._ His body shrank in around him, growing smaller and younger and alien to him. _He'll always be your little monster._

When Sebastian opened his eyes, he was still stretched out in bed, but it wasn't the apartment—it was a motel room. He could tell by the smell of the carpet. A television news broadcast was playing, and over it, Joseph and Juli discussing its contents.

"They haven't said anything about catacombs," Joseph was saying. "Or any of the other crazy things we saw in there. Isn't that proof enough?"

"They're not just going to bring that up on the NBC nightly news," argued Juli. "Even if they don't have control of the media. It doesn't prove anything."

Sebastian opened his eyes. He didn't recognize the motel but his partners were a welcome sight; they were sitting on the opposite bed together, watching the television. Both were bruised but cleaned up and dressed in fresh clothing, and seeing them well had Sebastian grinning.

"But it couldn't have been _real_. That's just...."

Joseph glanced over and saw him awake. Some of the color left his face and he immediately snatched the remote up to turn off the television. It alerted Juli, who swore under her breath, and together they gathered around Sebastian's bed. They were all elated and nervous at once and none of them knew what to say.

"Hey," said Joseph, watching like a hawk as Sebastian sat up against the headboard. "Do you...want some water?"

Sebastian didn't think he wanted anything in his stomach until he glanced at Juli and saw the beer in her hand. He waved for her to hand it over, which she did. "Be careful," she warned as he tipped the bottle to his mouth. "You weigh about ninety pounds now."

Sebastian drank. It wasn't strong but the alcohol tasted completely different on his tongue, and after he handed it back he found himself licking his lips. He looked over his new body, for the first time taking real stock of his shorter limbs, his paler, more youthful skin. He felt out the gentle slope of his jaw and the soft whorls of his hair. It was surreal and humbling, and he wondered—and then knew—how Ruvik had felt the first time it was his.

"Sebastian," said Joseph. He sounded hoarse. "It's...it really is you, isn't it? You're really Sebastian?"

"Yeah." Sebastian felt out the bruises he'd gained from tumbling down the stairs, and a few from earlier in the week he didn't get himself. At least they had cleaned him up and changed his clothes—he didn't know what he would have done if he'd woken up to the smell of smoke. With a deep breath he faced them both. "Yeah, it's me. I know it's nuts, but...it's me. Sebastian Castellanos."

Joseph's eyes pinched, and he looked like he could have cried—or had been already. He was so tired and Sebastian wished he could have reached inside him and made him forget everything that had happened. "What about Ruvik?" he asked. "Is he...?"

"He's still here." Sebastian gave his chest a rub. "It's kind of hard to explain, but...we're both here, now. And we're...." It was unbelievable and he couldn't help but laugh. "We're okay, I guess. Are you guys okay?"

They looked at him as if he'd lost his mind, and maybe he had. But then they laughed. They leaned into each other and laughed and wiped tears from their eyes, because they were all out of their minds.

Once they'd calmed down and had some water to drink, Juli laid out their situation. "We're at the Motel 12 on Interstate 41," she explained. "I had to hotwire a Subaru to get us here, but we should be okay for a little while. We managed to get some cash out of Joseph's accounts, too. I don't think anyone in the department knows...anything really, not yet. We don't know if anyone is looking for us yet, either."

Sebastian turned the water glass around and around in his hands. "What have they been saying about the building?"

"Nothing that matters. Just that there was a fire at FBI headquarters, agents are still on the scene...."

She trailed off, and she exchanged a glance with Joseph. Only with his nod did she continue. "They're saying there was only one survivor, in critical condition."

 _Gutierrez._ Sebastian knew immediately, but the expression on Joseph's face convinced him not to reveal it. "It doesn't matter," he said. "We did what we needed to do."

"I'm sorry," Joseph said abruptly. It didn't take a mind reader to see the amount of pain he was in, and immediately Sebastian reached for his hand. "This was my fault. I should—"

"Don't," Sebastian interrupted, squeezing his fingers. "This wasn't you."

"They only caught you because of me," he carried on. "You were only after _them_ because they had me. If I had just—"

"They were always going to kill me. They—" Sebastian cut himself off, his chest tight with the memory of Myra staring back at him across the barrel of a gun. "Myra...she was never going to let me live. She couldn't. If you'd died in the STEM—if I'd had to pull your corpse out of those fucking bathtubs—I would have given up. I wouldn't have gone after Ruvik, wouldn't have survived them as long as I did. It's not your fault that it's come to this."

"He's right," Juli added. "Mobius was waiting for their chance for a long time." She grimaced. "And if we're going to give each other shit for what we did when Mobius was controlling us, I'm just as guilty as you. Hell, I went to them _willingly_."

Joseph lowered his eyes. Sebastian had never entirely figured out what he was supposed to say when his partner took the world on his shoulders, and he sure as hell didn't know then either. It was tempting all over again to just sneak into his gray matter and turn off those terrible impulses, but he didn't need Ruvik in his ear to remind him not to cross that boundary. Instead he gave Joseph's hand a tug and waited for him to look up again.

"Joseph, I need you," he said, and he felt him flinch. "Whatever happened to get us to this point doesn't matter, but where we go from here does. Look at me, I've got to go through puberty again—I can't do that without you."

That got Joseph to smile, at least for a moment. "I'm not going anywhere," he assured, and it was everything Sebastian wanted to hear. "Whatever you need, I'm here."

"So am I," said Juli. "I've got nowhere else to go."

"Me, too," said Ruvik.

They all jumped, and when they followed the voice, they found Ruvik sitting in one of the motel chairs next to the television. He was reclining very easily, hands folded, his eyes bright and curious. "So, Cas," he said. "Where _do_ we go from here?"

His friends looked so bewildered that Sebastian couldn't help but smirk. Actually considering the question took some of the humor out of him, but he found the answer closer than he'd expected. "We've got work to do," he said, sealing his conviction more and more. "We've hurt Mobius, that's for sure. But they're not gone. They were keeping ahead of the feds—they've got to have more bases out there, more labs. Not to mention their real leaders."

"The elders," said Ruvik, steepling his fingers.

"That's not going to be easy," Juli warned. "I was one of them for a year and didn't come close to even hearing about what went on above the Administrator."

"We'll find them," Sebastian said confidently. "And we're going to end them, whatever it takes." He thought of Lim's hand on his daughter's back and an old woman gripping Myra's shoulder. "They're not going to get away with what they did to us, and neither is anyone that gets in our way. There's no point in us surviving all that if we don't see it through."

Juli took a deep breath and then nodded. Joseph offered a half smile. "If it was easy," he said with a shrug, "we wouldn't be interested."

They clinked their glasses in a toast, a promise made. For the first time in what felt like months, Sebastian was overwhelmed with a sense of purpose, but it was Ruvik's approval humming through him that gave him the strength he needed.

They spent the night at the hotel, exhaustion giving them sleep. In the morning, they packed the few belongings they had and took to the road. They left nothing behind.

-End-

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all for reading! Your comments, kudos, bookmarks and follows have meant the world to me, it's been a long and challenging fic and I appreciate your support so much.


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